Allison: I want a trip down memory lane.
Boris: *proceeds to grab every warrior cats book they have and sets them in Allison's lap*
Boris: I heard you needed these?
Allison: YES! ALL OF THEM!

Boris: We have fun, don't we, Tom?
Tom: I have never been more stressed out in my entire life.

Allison: Did Malice just tell me they loved me for the first time?
Boris: Yeah, they did.
Allison: And did I just do finger guns back?
Boris: Yeah, you did.

Malice: Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
Malice: I need my socks.

Boris: I'm so happy two of my favorite people are getting along now.
Henry: Uh, Allison and Malice are not getting along.
Boris: They're not trying to kill each other.
Henry: You may have a point.

Boris: What do you call a dictionary on drugs?
Tom: If you say "addict-ionary" I swear I will cut you.
Boris: I was actually going to say "high definition", but your answer's much better.
Tom: ...

Malice: What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you.
Ink Bendy: Being a fish.
Malice: Well, shit.

Boris: *coughs blood*
Malice: Don't die, Boris!
Boris: Don't tell me what to do!

Malice: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Malice lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!

Henry: Tom's refusing to wear their glasses!
Tom: Henry, look, I wore the glasses for a day. My eyes are much better now. Watch.
Tom: *points to Allison* Allison.
Tom: *points to Boris* Boris.
Tom: *points to Ink Bendy* Sasquatch.

Allison & Malice: *accidentally set the kitchen on fire*
Allison: We need an adult!
Malice: Allison, you are an adult!
Allison: We need an adultier adult! Get Tom!

Boris: So, what are we doing?
Allison: Wasting our lives.
Boris: I meant for lunch...

Allison: Why are you late?
Malice: A technical error occurred, causing an unexpectedly long bout of unconsciousness.
Allison: Overslept?
Malice: Overslept.

Henry: Okay, help me, please!
Malice: Got two words for you.
Henry: I bet they won't be helpful.
Malice: Your problem.
Henry: I was right.

Tom: I'm not a morning person. I'm barely even a person.

Ink Bendy: Did you wash the dishes?
Tom: I thought you wanted to do that...
Ink Bendy: *chuckles* You were WRONG.

Malice: I am not a lunatic. I have the psychiatric report to prove it. A slender majority of the panel decided in my favour.

Ink Bendy: You know you can die from that, right?
Malice: *smoking a cigarette* That's the point.
Henry: *drinking alcohol* We're trying to speed this up.
Allison: *Eating raw cookie dough and nodding*

Tom to Boris: First rule of battle, little one... don't ever let them know where you are.
Allison, shooting out of frame: WHOO-HOO! I'M RIGHT HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O' ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH! Whoo-hoo!
Tom: 'Course, there're other schools of thought.

Boris: *Pulls a glass a water from out of nowhere*
Tom: Where did you get that?
Boris: My pocket.
Tom: How do you keep a glass of water in your pocket?
Boris: Skills.

Malice: I'll offer you some friendly advice-
Tom: I don't want your advice.
Malice: Well, then consider it unfriendly advice.

Ink Bendy: I just had a long talk with Malice and Allison about hitting and now they are yelling "it's my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence" before hitting each other.

Henry: Hey guys, I found a spider. Cool little lad. Thanks for eating the mosquitos.
Henry: Oh no, where did it go?
Malice: HENRY WHAT THE FUCK?!

Malice: WHO ATE MY BREAD?!
Malice: I'M GOING TO FUCKING K-
Allison: I did?
Malice: Kiss you and buy some more, you haven't been eating anything today Allison.
*walking away*
Allison:
Allison: Their gone Henry.
Henry, coming out the closet with bread stuffed in their mouth: Twankh uh!

Ink Bendy: BWWAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, you hear that? That's the wrong opinion alarm.
Boris: That is not something you actually have installed.
Ink Bendy: Sorry, say again? I couldn't hear you over my alarm that YOU SET OFF with your WRONG-ASS OPINION.