IMPORTANT MESSAGE!

For plot reasons, Amy and I have decided to change the name of one of our character's names. Many of you have noticed I, as in Helena, mention the Character Melody a few times. She is my best friend and she will be mentioned more later, but we are changing her name to Emma.

Yes, that will be mildly confusing, but it is for plot purposes. Sorry for the confusion.

Also, trigger warnings. Panic attacks. I don't want to trigger anyone with my issue

Helena frowned, having heard Amy's mumbled comment whether she was meant to or not. In all honesty, Helena was surprised the shadow had not come for her already. All it took was feeling lost and wanting to escape, right? Maybe there was more, but Helena could not remember the details. She had definitely been feeling lost lately. Either way, Helena was not letting that shadow anywhere near Amy. Focus, Helena. Yes, Helena knows, shut up. A magic wand might work, Amy apparently has magic. Which would mean, in theory, she could use one. Getting a hold of a magic wand would be the issue though… Helena's thoughts came to an abrupt halt when they were interrupted by Snow's voice.

"Rieka! So good to see you out of your corner! And who is this?" Snow's warm smile turned toward Amy.

Helena adopted an easy smile, "This is my new friend, Lady Rosette, I rescued her from her grouch of a father. He wasn't letting her dance with any of the handsome young men." Helena stage whispered conspiratorially to Snow.

Helena could practically hear Amy rolling her eyes and there was a slight movement in her peripheral vision. Helena assumed that meant Amy had moved to pinch the bridge of her nose or something similar.

Snow laughed and Helena saw David smile from his place to Snow's left.

"I do hope you are enjoying the celebrations even with your father being… protective." Snow said, a smile still playing on her lips.

"Thank you. I am thoroughly enjoying the festivities despite my father's antics. The ceremony was beautiful! And your dress is gorgeous!" Amy said, slipping right back into the formal speech from before.

Helena had to fight to keep her face neutral. Amy had clearly forgotten that Regina had crashed the ceremony. She must have remembered because she was suddenly trying to cover up, "So… Rieka told me, except for that… thing… with Reg- Evil Queen… I'm so sorry… My father… We were late… I'm going to shut up now…"

Snow shared a sympathetic look with Charming. "Yes, well, our happiness is our own and The Evil Queen cannot take it unless we surrender it to her." David said, pulling Snow a little closer.

There was a pause. Everyone seemed to be waiting for someone else to speak. Helena could even feel Amy's eyes on her, practically begging her to say something. Helena said nothing. With storybook characters around her once again she had to play the part of Rieka and Rieka would not have come to the rescue of her new friend. Not even when Amy gave Helena her 'I Hate you' look.

"So, what are your plans for your honeymoon? Where are you going?" Amy asked, clearly trying to change the subject. Helena had to suppress an inappropriate comment she could have made there.

David smiled, "I'm afraid that is a secret. I intend to surprise my lovely bride."

Helena noticed the strange look Snow gave her prince. Oh, great, they haven't talked about it yet. This will be fun.

"Charming! You can't honestly expect to still be going!" Snow hissed.

David made his 'I'm semi laughing at you but also arguing with you' face. "Snow, of course, we are. What better way to...Snow? Where are you going?" David, unfortunately, was still semi-laughing at his bride's reaction as he turned to follow her out of the ballroom.

Amy turned sheepishly yet ecstatic to Helena, "Did I just make that happen? That was awesome!" She then backed down at Helena's motherly scolding gaze, "I'm sorry."

Helena sighed, "I suppose something had to trigger their next conversation. The show was never clear when that argument took place. Now, I believe we're-"

"Rosette!"

"Out of time…" Helena trailed off after hearing Rumple's call for his daughter.

"Great…" Amy mumbled under her breath, then something came to mind, "Oh, crap, Zach! I need to get back. Coming, Papa! Goodnight, Helena." She somehow ran in the dress without killing herself.

Zach?! What?! Helena wanted to call Amy back and make her explain, but the girl was already with Rumpelstiltskin. Dang, she pulled a Helena on Helena. Well done, Amy, well done.

Helena suddenly realized she had been left standing alone awkwardly. Without a person, she knew close by she had no one to focus on. Nothing solid to focus on. Suddenly, the smells all around her started taking over and the feeling of fire ants crawling over her skin made itself known. No, no, no, Helena, you. Are. Over. This! Keep it together. Keep it together. Keep it together. Helena turned and made quickly for the door. She needed out. The ants climbed higher, Helena could not hear voices anymore, just a loud ringing. No, no, no. White noise surrounded her. Where had the air gone? Helena tried to breathe, but it only made the smells worse. Outside. Outside. Outside. Helena finally made it to the castle gardens, but it did not help. The ants had climbed too high. Helena remembered finding something solid and falling against it before the white ringing took over.

"-ellow… yellow… yellow."

"Blue."

"Sky."

"Stars." who?

"Purple."

"Blue… blue… blu… bl…" the whiteness that had started to recede crept back.

"No, no, focus. Green."

The white moved away. "Emma."

If Helena had been more aware she would have sensed the confusion emanating from the voice, "Sword."

"Shield."

"Bow."

"Arrow."

Helena was becoming more and more aware. The ringing was mostly gone and the white in her vision was clearing. She could see a figure in front of her. Whether they were standing, sitting, or crouching Helena could not tell. She still could not focus well.

"Tree."

"Bush."

"Ground."

"Dirt." Helena could see him now, because, yes, it was a him. He wore the uniform of the castle guard and he was crouched in front of her. He must have removed his helmet because she could see his face very clearly. His chainmail hood was also pulled back leaving his shaggy dirty blonde hair disheveled. His eyes were the darkest blue Helena had ever seen. At the moment, they were filled with concern and, surprisingly, understanding.

"There she is. Here," The guard said, a smile forming on his face as he handed Helena a water skin. "Drink," He instructed. Helena was not one for taking orders, but she knew what was best for herself coming out of a panic attack and water would help. So, she took the offered skin and drank. Not too much, but enough. Her throat felt like she had been screaming. Maybe she had been.

"Better?" The guard asked.

Helena simply nodded, handing the skin back. "How… how did you know to do that?" Realistically, Helena knew that people would have had panic attacks in times like this, but it seemed odd to her that a random soldier would know how to properly handle someone having one. Most people, even in the modern world, did not know how to properly help a person through a panic attack. Usually, they just end up making the situation worse.

"My sister used to have… fits like that." His eyes were downcast as he answered.

Helena decided not to press. Instead, she smiled, "Well, thank you. I… I've never had anyone help me before. Much less know how to."

The guard's eyes flashed with gratitude before he answered, "You are welcome." He offered Helena his hand, but noticing her hesitancy to take it he smiled, "Take your time."

That's what Emma says. With so many kids in her house, Helena had learned very quickly that you spoke loud and fast if you wanted your words heard. If you slowed down or stuttered no one stopped to listen to you. No one would pay attention. No one except Emma. Helena had met a lot of people in her life, but she had never met anyone who asked a question and waited patiently for the answer, who offered her something and did not get impatient when she could not decide if she wanted it. No one except Emma. 'Take your time'. Helena remembered everything around her coming to a stop the first time Emma said that to her. She had been so shocked. And it had not been just once. Emma always said it when Helena was having trouble with her words, when she could not decide what she wanted, or if she wanted to talk about something that was bothering her. 'Take your time'.

"Close your eyes," The soldier's voice broke her out of her thoughts. "Just close your eyes and take a moment." Helena noticed he had not retracted his hand, still holding it out for when she was ready to take it.

Helena did as he bade her. Closing her eyes and tilting her head back. Breathing in the fresh air. She could smell the flowers, she could hear fireflies. She could smell the grass, she could hear the water falling from a fountain. She could smell… him, she could hear his heartbeat. It was strong and steady. Consistent.

Helena smiled as she opened her eyes. Reaching forward, she took his outstretched hand. He pulled her up slowly, careful not to jostle her. He let her go as soon as Helena was on her feet, but she noticed that he kept his hands out toward her for a moment. Probably checking to make sure she could stay on her feet.

"Thank you." She said again

The young soldier bowed with a slight bit of teasing dramatic flair. "A knight is always happy to serve. My name is Dorien."

"Rieka," Helena said with a smile.

"Well, Rieka, It was nice to meet you, but I must return to my duties now. Please consider getting some rest." And then he was gone, striding off at a brisk pace to who knows where. Probably his post.

Helena stood there for another moment, just thinking. She felt like Will Treaty with her thoughts flitting from one thing to another so fast it was like butterfly wings. Though Helena supposed it was more accurate to say hummingbird wings, but that did not match with Will.

Past, present, and future, multiplied by possibilities and choices. It was like trying to understand the multiverse theory. Or the science of time travel. Helena has watched enough science-fiction TV shows to know how most thought time travel would work, but did that even apply to this? Would anything she, or Amy for that matter, did here change how the original story played out? That's how it had worked for The Savior and Hook, but were she and Amy subject only to the rules of this fictional world, or were they somehow expected to follow a jumbled set of rules from both worlds? Their own and this one. What about the amount of time that paced? Would she be gone from her world, from her life, as long as she was here? Or was it like Narnia? Where she would only have been gone a few seconds? Helena desperately hoped it was like Narnia. But if it was like Narnia did that also mean that she would forget who she is and where she came from? Like the four children had forgotten? Helena did not want to forget. There were too many important things she needed to remember. Then again, the four siblings needed Narnia to find out who they were and who they were going to be. But Helena knew all that already. She knew her place in life and she liked it. However, she got here it had been no wish of hers. Did that mean she would not forget? Or was she analyzing her new life based on the wrong book series?

Helena turned and headed to her room. She needed to rest, even if sleep would be unlikely tonight. She could try and think through all the logistics of what was going on later. After all, she had several months to kill before she could go to the dark castle and discuss things with Amy.