Elliot has never been there when the smoke has settled. He's been there in the belly of the beast alongside her, he's even been the beast itself but he's never really been there in the calm quiet that comes with the stillness the aftermath that follows chaos. The dead silence of her empty home with the exception of the rattling buzz of the fridge covered in post it's and pictures is the only sound that plays soundtrack to her sadness in these moments. Her son guarded safely away from this and tucked away so that she can be alone with it all but not tonight.
Elliot shows up with cold hands and red cheeks without a warning call or courtesy text, he just appears at her door long after she's showered and changed into pants that are too big with a tank perhaps too small. He has a tray with a couple teas and doesn't say a word when she opens the door but instead walks forward until she's guiding him back to her living room.
She doesn't bother asking him who told him what or where because she knows the why- why he's here after 11pm sitting on her couch beside her sharing in the silence.
He could explain himself, he could ask for forgiveness or offer explanations of himself and his actions but tonight isn't about any of that so he holds her hand with one hand and nurses a tea that looks tiny in his big hand with the other.
She can feel all that lies silently to rest between them. The heaviness that comes with forgiveness but the power that comes with surrendering to it all so she lets her head fall on his shoulder and pretends that she can't feel the way his lips are just so softly touching her hair when he goes to speak.
He asks about Noah, compliments her on what a good score her new place is and keeps it light, most of all so he can just continue to share in this special brand of nearness between them because he knows how rare it is for him to be invited into this part of her world.
The part that she guards up tight and doesn't share with anyone, including her son is now a space she's allowing him to be in- with her. Not out of duty or an obligation that runs blue but out of a want that exceeds friendship and all that's left unspoken.
So he goes to kiss her when he follows her into the kitchen because he has run out of reasons not to and mostly because she looks so beautiful and so exhausted this late into the evening , and for his own selfish reasons it only feels right to him.
It seems that it feels right to her too when she moans softly into his mouth letting his tongue touch hers so delicately that it makes her eyes roll and it's so overwhelming that she has to pull away and put her forehead to his. To still him and freeze this moment before it runs too far ahead of her.
"I'm not ready yet…" it barely leaves her mouth and she almost questions if she even said it to begin with until she feels him exhale and nod against her, softly closing his eyes while never for a second letting go of the hold his arms have wrapped around her body.
"And I'm not leaving." She nods now and let's him hold her and kisses his neck before letting her forehead rest against it.
Where there were once a land of never's and walls there is now hope to all the yets ahead of them that hold promise and love.