North Stars
Chapter 12
Mike felt like he was in a total fog. He remembered Christine and the girls being there at different points. And Tom, Sasha, Russ, Kara, Danny, Wolf, Azima…so many people came and went. He was in intense pain and seemed to sleep a lot. They did another surgery on his hip and knee and took the chest tube out. One morning; Christine came in and smiled at him.
"How long have I been here?" Mike whispered.
"Nearly a month. They are talking about physical therapy soon though." Christine answered. She moved the table and unwrapped something that was foil wrapped.
"What's that?" Mike asked.
"Well, your nurse said you could start eating solids as long as it was soft. Katie made applesauce cake and thought you might like some." Christine explained. She cut a bit off and put the fork to Mike's mouth. He immediately took a bit and tried to smile.
"Very good." Mike said. She continued feeding him the cake and then gave him a drink of water.
"How are you feeling today?" Christine asked.
"Slightly better. Still in pain. Feel like I've slept a lot." Mike said.
"You heal best when you sleep." Christine remarked.
"Can you shave me today?" Mike asked.
"Of course. I was planning on giving you a bath today." Christine answered. Since he had been hurt; she helped him bathe, shave and feel a bit more human.
"I don't want you to overdo." Mike remarked.
"I'm okay. Besides; Kara is coming to visit tomorrow. Officially." Christine said. Mike nodded in understanding. Kara was now a senator and was heading up the investigation on the air strike in the Baltic. Reiss had ordered the fleet into the Baltic, which the Russians had seen as an act of aggression, and Congress had not declared war. There was talk of impeaching Reiss.
"Oh." Mike said. It was hard to talk about things he didn't remember. Apparently he had regained consciousness and pulled a lot of people out of the burning bridge that day on the Michener. He didn't remember it and all he knew was there had still been fifty-two deaths.
"I went to the doctor earlier today. Had another ultrasound. Everything is still okay. The nurse wrote the gender on a piece of paper and then sealed it in an envelope so we could find out together. If you want to?" Christine said. They hadn't talked about the baby, other than Mike making it clear to Christine not to get an abortion and to take it easy.
"I don't want to know. You can open it if you want." Mike said. Christine sat down next to him and touched his uninjured hand.
"Mike…Lucas would want you to love this baby. He would be thrilled to be a big brother. I miss him too…a lot. I think about him every day. You wouldn't be replacing him." Christine told him gently.
"This isn't about Lucas." Mike insisted.
"Isn't it? Sure, we had plans of traveling and all, but this seems more deep-seeded than that." Christine asked.
"Its a lot of different things. Your age and how a pregnancy at this stage can endanger your life. The baby may not be…normal." Mike said.
"And mostly Lucas." Christine said.
"Its not about Lucas." Mike insisted.
"We'll agree to disagree on that. Just know that Lucas would want you to love this baby and no one will judge you for it." Christine said. She gave him a kiss on the cheek and smiled at him. It annoyed him but he decided not to address it.
"About that bath?" Mike asked and Christine nodded. She got off the bed and began getting the necessary supplies together. Mike was glad she had dropped the subject of the baby and Lucas.
Getting attached to the new baby meant letting Lucas go and he didn't want to do that. He knew it wasn't a proper way to grieve. He just knew that he missed his boy and loving a new baby seemed very unfair to Lucas. At least so far; Christine was having a very healthy pregnancy and was absolutely glowing. She seemed completely thrilled. He just hoped she could love the baby enough for the both of them.