CHAPTER 3. GREEN LIGHT.
A smile tugged at her lips as she read Peeta's text.
He was great at coming up with clever captions for the random pictures she sent him throughout the day. Today, she'd sent a picture of Flavius, her neighbor's cute poodle, in a stylish outfit and the message she got back a few minutes later definitely brightened up her day.
After all, the whole situation of hiring someone to be her date to Annie's wedding didn't turn out to be as bad and awkward as Katniss initially feared.
In fact, she and the man who had suddenly become her savior easily settled into a sort-of-friendly-but-also-business-related sort of relationship. What began as Katniss texting him the details of the wedding, promptly turned into a full-fledged conversation when Peeta began asking various random questions about her expectations as a bridesmaid, her friends, her time at college and everything in between.
Now, more than a month after that initial text, an awkward exchange of pictures, and hours on the phone later, their conversation was well beyond the point of mere acquaintances. It had become sort of a routine by now, to text back and forth throughout the day about anything at all and, sometimes, to finish off the day with a call. Katniss would never admit to it, but, more often than not, she found herself looking forward to listening to Peeta's reassuring voice before going to sleep.
She'd learned a whole lot about Peeta. Sure, they'd gone over the basics: he was currently doing a masters in journalism at Northwestern University where he was also taking some art courses, he liked writing about everyday people and things everyone could relate to, and he volunteered as an art teacher at a local community center. Over time, Katniss had also come to learn that he was the youngest of three brothers, that his favorite movie was The Godfather (all of them, he couldn't make up his mind about which one), that no matter how late he went to bed he was always up at 6:30 am, that he liked to bake, and that he could listen to any kind of music at all.
Talking to him came naturally to Katniss and the more she learnt about him made her think better of him, something that had seldom happened before. The guy was, really, an open book.
Maybe due to this realization, Katniss' defenses had slowly lowered around him and she ended up trusting in him enough to tell him an astounding amount of information about herself. She rationalized it by thinking that it was because she couldn't feel judged by someone that seemed so distant. Nonetheless, sharing anything about herself at all was something completely out of character for Katniss' cautious and distrustful self. Somehow, Peeta seemed to understand her in a way nobody had before, except for maybe Prim. Also, if anything, opening up to him felt good. It felt good to finally have someone know some of her thoughts without judging, someone that was completely on her side.
For some reason, he never judged her, or at least never let her feel it. Not even because of the fact that she was literally hiring someone to pose as her boyfriend. And it was a relief for sure. Katniss was convinced that if the situation was reversed, she would have been very judgmental and prejudiced.
Peeta Mellark really did seem like a genuinely nice person. And that sucked for Katniss and her weakness for nice people.
It was a particularly chilly night, despite it being late April.
Tired as hell after a predominantly shitty day, Katniss put on her fluffiest robe, made herself a big cup of warm chamomile tea, grabbed some chocolate chip cookies and decided to go to bed early. She turned on the TV, absentmindedly sipping on her tea and flipping through the channels until she found some 90s series rerun. Katniss turned on the volume and programmed the TV to turn off in an hour.
It was one of those days in which she hated her loneliness, in which the silence and emptiness of her home seemed scary instead of welcoming.
These were the kinds of days in which she called someone or went to sleep over at a friend's home. Anything to feel less lonely.
But Prim had a big exam to prepare for and Katniss had just been with her friends from work, not to mention that they'd find it odd if she called them at this time. Frowning, Katniss placed the empty plate and cup next to her bed and laid down. She closed her eyes and focused on listening to the droning dialogues and the pre-recorded laughter on the TV.
Sometime later, she dozed off.
Her eyes opened violently a few hours later.
She was trembling uncontrollably and feeling incredibly cold. Her pajamas felt sticky with drying sweat and her hair, undone from her usual braid, was sticking to her clammy face.
She sat up, propping herself up on her pillows, and looked around in the darkness of her empty room. Her bed was a mess, her sheets and comforter tangled in a mess on the floor as if she'd violently kicked them off her.
The last notes of the song her father had been whistling in her dream were playing themselves in her head over and over again, making her feel small and weak once again. Helpless. Lonely.
Lonely like she was now.
At least she'd had Prim with her then.
Katniss got up on shaky legs and made her way to the bathroom, almost collapsing on the sink.
After she washed her face and drank a glass of water, it became pretty clear that she wouldn't be able to sleep for at least a couple of hours.
With trembling legs, Katniss sat on her freshly made bed and unlocked her phone.
It was roughly 1 am.
She'd only gotten two texts since she'd gone to sleep. One from Prim, wishing her a good night and promising to call her back tomorrow. One from Peeta Mellark, it was some funny meme about grandparents using the internet for the first time.
Wholesome, she typed and added a laughing emoji.
Usually she was not the type to use emojis. However, since Peeta and her began texting, Katniss had gotten more and more used to them.
She was surprised when he immediately responded with another funny picture. This time, it was a goofy animal picture. A small smile made its way to her lips.
Katniss found herself typing it before thinking it through: I know it's late but can I call you?
She waited for what seemed like the longest three minutes of her life until he began typing back.
Sure, he said.
She pressed the green icon before she changed her mind.
"Hey! Sorry for the late call."
"No problem," he answered and Katniss could picture a smile on his face, "I was binging on the new Netflix series and just sort of lost track of time".
"Really? I have yet to find a series that interests me enough to finish it," Katniss added with a snort.
"So why are you up so late?"
She curled in bed with the phone on speaker and let some of it out.
The bad dreams.
Her fear of dark, crowded, and subterranean places.
How much she missed her dad.
It was something she did not like to think about. How her life had changed so drastically from one day to the other. How her and Prim almost didn't make it. How terrified she was of inheriting her mother's weakness.
The next morning, Katniss didn't even remember falling asleep and was too ashamed to look at her call log to find out when that had happened.
Peeta and Katniss had agreed to meet for the first time a couple of days before their trip. To be honest, Katniss had tried pushing off their meeting as much as possible, an irrational fear always overwhelming her whenever she thought about the idea of meeting the person that she shared so much with during the past weeks. However, they had yet to come up with a story about their relationship and she had to explain a few more details regarding their trip. Katniss couldn't put it off any longer.
It was Peeta who brought it up, casually making a comment during one of their usual nightly phone calls.
His words brought Katniss back to reality, to the fact that this was a mere transaction and their relationship was really a business. Somehow, she'd found that detail so tedious to think about that it had almost slipped her mind.
She suggested they meet for a coffee at Starbucks on a Wednesday, the most boring meet-up she could come up with.
Peeta, however, laughed as if it was the silliest thing in the world and said he knew a nice place that he'd love to show her. With all the nonchalance she could muster, Katniss agreed.
Now, as she navigated the busy streets of downtown Chicago, Katniss felt as if her heart would burst out of her chest at any second. She walked past a couple of graffitied walls and independent-looking stores, following the indications on her phone.
She finally stopped at the door of Mockingjay Café, an antique and cozy looking shop that looked very out of place in that modern neighborhood. As she looked at the wooden and glass door, Katniss grasped her phone harder in her hand and tried to stop the pit of nerves from swallowing her whole.
Trying not to overthink, she made her way in and allowed her gaze to roam around the small space.
She spotted a broad pair of shoulders and golden hair at the farthest corner and shakily made her way over there.
Katniss moved towards the chair opposite where he was sitting, her hand hovering near the back of the chair with hesitation. "Peeta? Hi."
Peeta Mellark shot her a radiant smile. He was bigger than she'd pictured him. Taller, wider, more muscled.
"Katniss, it's great to finally meet you," he said standing up and suddenly engulfing her in a bear hug.
Katniss froze on the spot, his warmth surrounding her small frame. Unused to physical contact, especially from strangers, every instinct in Katniss' body alerted her to flee.
Just as she was easing into the unexpected contact, he let go.
"I'm a hugger," Peeta said as he pulled the chair for her and sat down himself, his boyish face coloring with the faintest tinge of red.
As she sat, the only thing Katniss could think about was that Peeta Mellark was a lot taller than she'd imagined.
A smiling waitress came by their table to take their orders and Katniss felt the tension slowly melting off. Peeta made small talk, making her feel at ease, as if they were talking over the phone. Soon enough, Katniss found herself telling him all about college and her friends, about how Annie and Finnick had met, about her disastrous friends with benefits relationship with Gale, and, finally, about her fallout with both him and Madge.
Peeta listened raptly as she spoke and, thankfully, did not comment on her stupid choices. The few times Katniss glanced at him, his face gave nothing away as he seemed to drink in her words.
It hadn't been as terrible as she'd imagined, really. It helped that he was clearly not judging her at all.
As the waitress came with her third cup of hot chocolate, Katniss finally seemed to run out of words. She felt as if she'd never spoken so much in her entire life.
Sensing her awkwardness, Peeta took over the conversation. "Have I ever told you how I found this place?"
With an easy smile, he explained how he'd found this place on a lazy Sunday walking around the city, back when he had just moved in.
As she watched him talk, using his hands to evoke vivid images in her mind, Katniss realized he had a way with words like no other person she'd met before.
"This place reminds me a lot of the place my father owned when I was growing up," Peeta said, his face brightening up. "Though it would be perfect if it had a bookshop".
"Maybe this could be the place we went on our first date," Katniss blurted out without thinking, "you know, the beginning of our fake relationship," she added. A furious blush already coloring her cheeks.
"I bet it was one hell of a beginning", he said winking at her.
Katniss almost choked mid-sip of her hot cocoa at his words but promptly laughed it off.
That night, he walked her home even though they pretty much lived on opposite sides of the city.
A/N: I'd love to know what you think so far!