Nope

At the edge of the camp, Hope sat alone on the top of one of the rocky hills. It overlooked the entire camp from above, and the view of the sunset was a true sight to behold. However, Hope's eyes were staring at the reddish-brown rock below her, while her back was sat against a conveniently-placed boulder; her legs were being hugged to her chest, and her hair was softly dancing in the cool breeze. After everything that just happened, it was true that Hope was happy - relieved especially - yet that was also why she needed this moment alone. All those emotions, felt that strongly, had made Hope feel… overwhelmed almost. She needed a moment where she could digest everything, feel everything slowly and at her own pace. Moreover, just because so many people had accepted her, didn't mean that Hope's trauma was gone. It didn't say, "Sorry. Gotta go." No, Hope was still traumatized. Very much so.

Mara's voice would probably never leave Hope. She would always be a part of who Hope was. Even so, Hope wouldn't let that part of her control her life any longer. Again, she needed to stop letting the "impossible" control her; because, after today, Hope was living proof that the impossible was possible. And it made her happy. So despite Mara's voice, despite the never-ending trauma, Hope was able to find freedom. She was glad to have found true happiness, and that was more than enough for her.

Hope didn't… need anything else. If she had her friends, then-

"Hey."

"W-What…?!" Hope yelped upon hearing that unexpected voice. But like every single time prior, the girl's eyes found the owner of the voice, and her face went red with embarrassment. "O-Oh, um… Hey, Newt."

"Can we talk?" he asked, his face void of any emotion. "Just for a little bit."

"S-Sure." Hope nodded. "You can sit-"

Newt had already sat himself next to Hope, though, before she could finish. Even worse (or better?), he sat himself right next to her, so the sides of their bodies were flushed together. The feeling made Hope's cheeks become even redder.

"Thomas is giving Brenda some of his blood," Newt acknowledged. "We don't know if she'll live, but… who knows. Nobody thought we'd get this far, so I guess anything is possible."

"You can say that again," Hope said as a smile formed on her face. "I can't believe that this isn't all a dream… It feels too good to be true, y'know?"

"...Are you feeling better?" Newt questioned after a short pause of hesitation. "You cried a lot back there. The others practically picked me up and forced me to come check on you."

"Ohhh," Hope let out a noise of understanding. "So you're up here for their sakes."

"Sort of."

"'Sort of'?"

"Well, I obviously want to know too," Newt stated and then turned his head, where his eyes found Hope's slightly shocked ones. "Hope, I've never seen you act like that before. No, I've never seen anyone cry like that before. A-And I'm not saying that it was wrong or anything, but… Well…"

A conflicted expression formed on Newt's face. It was obvious that he wanted to articulate what he was feeling in words, but he simply could find the right ones. His eyebrows creased, he bit his lip, his right leg started ticking up and down, and his head turned away from her. Newt was obviously not having a good time over there, and yet… Hope couldn't stop herself from smiling. That mix of annoyance and puzzlement on his face, made Hope feel oddly reminiscent.

"That takes me back…" When Hope mumbled this, Newt looked back to find her warmly smiling up at him. "That face hasn't changed a bit."

"What?" Newt mumbled back. "Takes you back to…?"

"When we were kids, and when you couldn't figure something out, you always had that exact expression on your face," Hope explained fondly. "You would get this angry, irritated look in your eyes, and you would bite your lip - almost until it bled sometimes. Your leg would start jerking like that, and Minho would always have to yell at you to stop." A light embarrassment then crossed Hope's face. "I-In all honesty, though, I remember seeing that expression, and I… I always waited a little bit to help you out, because I thought you looked cute."

Dot.

Dot.

Dot.

Slap! Hope slapped a hand over her mouth, as well as whipped her head the opposite direction of Newt's. Similarly, her 'light embarrassment' turned into full-blown embarrassment, because her face turned redder than it had ever been. You know that feeling when you tripped in front of a whole crowd of people? At first, the fall just hurt your body. You felt sore. But then, slowly yet so very quickly, the reality that you just tripped in front of everyone set in, and the physical pain turned into a light nudge compared to the mental pain equivalent to being punched in the gut fifty times. Yeah, well, that was exactly what Hope was now feeling. Precisely like nobody meant to fall in front of people (except if you were weird, I guess), Hope didn't mean to say that. It just came out! Seriously, Hope would kill to have a time machine right then and there. But since she didn't have one, the possibility of just killing herself looked pretty ap-

Wait.

That wasn't… the only time.

No, that wasn't the only expression that…

Suddenly, Hope realized something during her moments of pure mortification. Seeing that expression on Newt's face may have reminded Hope of one of his expressions, but… Now that Hope had remembered that expression, she started to remember all of the… other ones. And, worst of all, Hope remembered thinking that each of them were cute! Hope remembered that every time Newt would smile, frown, get angry, get annoyed, get disgusted, or any other expression that would show on his face, she would always… be unable to look away from him. Without even realizing it, Hope would merely stare at Newt without being able to look away. And not only did she think that Newt was cute, she also remembered her child-brain thinking that he was han-

Oh my god, Hope screamed in her mind. I totally had a crush on him!

In all actuality, Hope was about to scream. Or pass out. Or both. Hope didn't know how to process stuff like that! She had no idea how to handle it or how to get over it! Really, this entire situation wasn't even a big deal, yet the girl had no experience whatsoever in the "Mushy-Feelings Department"! And for Newt, no less! Newt, who had very much turned into more than a simple "crush" in the past few weeks! This was bad. This was very, very ba-

"Hope."

Hearing Newt's voice, Hope almost had a heart-attack. "Y-Yes…?!"

"Who's Mara?"

Thump. That was when the embarrassment left, and her single heartbeat shook her entire body. That was when Hope's red face went pale, almost like she had become ill in mere seconds, because that name… That name coming out of Newt's lips, sounded extremely wrong. Like Mara's name being spoken by Newt was supposed to be an unforgivable sin. But Newt had spoken it. He wasn't afraid of facing Hell.

"H-How do you…" Shakily, Hope moved her head back toward Newt. "You sh-shouldn't know that name…"

"I heard you talk about her to Aris," Newt said, his eyes staring back into Hope's anxiously. "And judging by that look in your eyes, I was right to assume that she's not someone you like."

"U-Um…" Hope's body shrank. "It's not… She's not…"

"Hearing you talk about the past, reminded me that there's still a part of it we don't know about," Newt remarked with his eyes now full of sadness. "You're keeping one last thing from us, aren't you? And it involves whoever this 'Mara' is."

Hope started shaking her head. "N-Newt… You know that I trust you, but… that part of me is scary."

"Is that why you haven't said anything?"

"W-Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

"I was waiting for you to come to us," Newt said before letting out a long sigh. "But I'm selfish, and I need to know. Especially now that I've seen how you react to just her bloody name. And you know I would never push you. I wouldn't force you to do anything, but this is… Hope, what happened to you?"

Never in her life had Hope spoken about what "happened" to her, not even to the person that caused it. She had never, in full detail, admitted to someone what she had gone through. So yes, hearing someone ask about that unspoken thing horrified Hope. It made her scared to fully face her dark past, and yet… And yet Newt. Newt was the one asking her, and he was everything to Hope. From the day she met him for the first time, and from the day they met again, Newt had Hope's heart and soul. He was the one she first allowed herself to be vulnerable with, he was the first person to comfort her, and he was the one who gave her the strength to say the hard truth. Everything good that had happened to her, was linked to him. And now, that same boy was pleading for her to open up some more. Hope's "everything" was asking for everything that she was.

Therefore, there was no way that…

Newt truly was Hope's weakness.

"Are you sure?" Hope questioned. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"I want to know everything there is about you," Newt said, not a single hint of uncertainty in his words or eyes. "The good, the bad, everything… I just want you for you."

Then that settled it.

If Newt wanted something, then Hope would do everything in her power to give it to him.

"What I said before - about living in luxury - was true, but there's another truth that's much more… selfish," Hope sighed while her eyes turned to gaze out at the sunset. "I didn't want that life: the life where I lived in a nice home with nice things in it. Back then, I would stare out at this same sunset and wish that I could throw it all away. Wish that I could be someone else. Someone that… wasn't "Ava Paige's favorite"." Hope took a deep breath. "I might have not remembered my brother or my friends, but I yearned to be in that room with you all. A room with no furniture, metal walls, and uncomfortable bunk beds. I wanted that life - I prayed for that life regardless of how fortunate I was, because I… I was scared of Ava's home. I was scared of Mara every single time that she came home to her mother."

Newt's eyes widened. "You mean…"

"Mara is Ava Paige's daughter," Hope said and then leaned her head against the boulder behind her. As she looked up at the sky, she could see Newt staring down at her, his eyes never leaving her. "There was this room… with big windows in it. They started at the ground, going all the way up to the ceiling. I would look out at them every day to see this sky, and I remember wanting nothing more than to touch it, to not feel glass separating me from the outside world. That room that those large, bright windows were in… was so dark. Unnaturally dark. I spent so many years of my life just sitting in it. Just… rotting away in it. But then, the darkness would turn into blackness every time that… that Mara would come back home." Saying this, a single tear fell from Hope's blue eye. "Sh-She'd tell me terrible things, Newt. Terrible things that made me want to do even worse things. I didn't want to believe her at first. I didn't want to believe that I was worthless or unloved, but… Eventually, I couldn't not believe her."

Hearing Hope call herself "worthless" and "unloved" made Newt's eyes turn sadder than they already were. Although, because of the sadness, Newt could finally put the pieces together in regards to Hope's nightmares. 'The woman' was Ava Paige, while 'the girl' must have been Mara. Though, simply saying that name in his head made Newt boil with rage. Again, through Hope's sadness, Newt could finally start to understand why Hope was Hope. He had a few more questions, however.

"Hope," Newt turned his whole body toward her, "did she touch you?"

Deliberately, Hope's eyes found his. "Newt…"

Hope may have not answered him with words, but her expression was proof enough. And thinking back to those two times that Hope had flinched away from him, made Newt almost explode. It got even worse, though, once Newt remembered something else. "A-And those things you said to me in that building… She made you think those things, didn't she? She made you feel like you were-"

"No, you're insane for wanting me.

"Why would you want me?

" Wh-What's there to want?"

…

"Trust me, you'd be better off without me."

"I'm going to kill her." It wasn't that Newt spoke that sentence in an angry or enraged tone. No, it was the fact that he said such a dark thing in such an unemotional way. Newt meant what he was saying. "I'm just going to kill her. I've… I've never hated another human being this much. I can't even put it into words how much I hate her. If I ever meet this thing, I'm just going to freaking strangle her. I'm gonna-"

"Newt!" Hope shouted before he could finish. "Newt, no! I don't want you to do that!"

"Why not? She hurt you."

"I know."

"So why not?"

"Because you don't hurt people." When Hope said this, Newt's completely emotionless eyes changed back into his normal ones. The boy that now stared back at Hope, was the kind, sympathetic Newt that Hope had fallen for. "And hurting Mara won't change anything for me."

"Hope…" Newt breathed. "I know that hurting people, regardless of who they are, isn't your thing. I get that, but you can't just… Aren't there some people that deserve to be hurt?"

"Hurting Mara won't change anything for me, because you've already healed me," Hope said, causing Newt's eyes to widen. But before he could respond, Hope stood up and walked forward. Below her, she could see the Right Arm and her friend enjoying themselves. She felt their happiness, their relief, and everything in between. "I don't need anyone to hurt anyone, because I don't hurt anymore. Not when it comes to what Mara said to me. Just being with you guys, means more to me than all those years I spent with Mara."

Behind her, Hope could hear Newt stand up as well; she could also feel his intense gaze on her back. Still, she did not turn around. Not just yet.

"Even though it felt selfish to be near you all," Hope started again, "I couldn't not be near you. Newt, when I bumped into you in the hallway back at WICKED, I followed you on instinct. I didn't want to let any of you go. I wanted to be with you despite everything that Mara told me. That's how much you all mean to me." One last leap. There was one last leap that Hope had to accomplish, and it was the longest leap of them all. Still, to fully free herself from Mara, Hope would need to make this leap. Thus, Hope lifted up each of her sleeves to her elbows before dropping them back to her sides, giving Newt a perfect view of her scars. "I'm happy that I'm alive, Newt. I'm happy that life gave me a second chance even when I didn't want one. So although trying to take my life away is what led me to meet you all," Hope finally turned around to face Newt, "I'm glad that it happened. I can now look back at my past and not feel shame or self-hatred. Now, I can just feel glad about it."

That emotionless look in Newt's eyes was gone, swapped with a look so powerful that his eyes were on the brink of tears. With the orange sunset behind her, Newt looked at Hope like she was the most beautiful thing in the world. She was oh-so precious to him, even more now that he knew what she had suffered through. However, precisely like Hope, Newt could feel happiness despite the overflowing sadness. Hope had spent her entire life in the Glade helping other people; she dismissed her own feelings so that someone else could feel better. But now, Newt relished in the fact that he and his friends were able to finally return the favor. Hope had carried their pain, so it was time for them to carry hers. Newt didn't think he could love this girl any more than he already did, but… Hope was good at proving him wrong.

"Oh my god, just come here." So, not being able to control his emotions any longer, Newt grabbed Hope's hand and pulled her into a hug. He wrapped his arms around her neck, and he almost died when Hope wrapped her own arms around to his back. Newt then nuzzled his nose into her hair, while he felt Hope nuzzle into his shoulder. "I'm sorry… I'm about everything that happened to you… I can't even begin to imagine-"

"Yes, you can," Hope interjected in a soft tone, "which is why you mean so much to me. We understand what it's like to feel utterly hopeless - like there's no reason to continue on. So please, for my sake and your own, let's move on together, okay? I don't… I-I don't wanna live a life without you in it, Newt."

"Me neither," Newt agreed, but that was when Newt also realized something. It caused his cheeks to go red. "Hope, after all that you've told me… There's something I need to tell you, too."

"There is?"

"Mhm."

"What is it…?"

"You… might get angry with me."

"W-What?!" Almost immediately, Hope broke the hug and shook her head up at Newt. "No, I would never! Th-There's absolutely nothing in this world that would make me angry with you! I swear, I have no anger! None at all! It's not even a word to-"

Newt's lips were on Hope's in a blink of an eye, his warmth seeping into her body. However, just like the first time, Hope became frozen to her spot. She didn't know how to react, but… it felt nice. So nice that Hope was about to close her eyes until Newt slowly broke the kiss.

"I love you," Newt whispered, resting his forehead against hers. "I'm in love with you."

At first, Hope wondered if she had misheard. She had to have misheard, right? That word… That three-worded sentence that Hope had promised never to say in her head and especially out-loud… Had Newt truly said it to her? Hope was so flabbergasted that she didn't even blush. She just stood there, which caused Newt to quickly disconnect their foreheads and step back.

"P-Please say something," Newt pleaded as his face got redder by the second. "I'd rather you bloody reject me than never speak to me again."

"You couldn't have…" Hope could barely breathe. "D-Did you really just say that?"

"Well, judging by this reaction, I'm kinda hoping I didn't."

"But…"

"But what?"

"Did you… really say that?"

"Well…" Newt promptly let out an irritated scoff. "W-Well yeah, okay?! I did say it! I bloody did! I-I mean, how could I not love you?!" Hearing that four-letter word, Hope's eyes widened even more. "It's impossible not to fall in love with you, Hope! You're nice and smart and all those other things! You're never mean to anyone, you always try to help people, and you're just… You're beautiful, alright?! And I just love you. I do. And I don't think I'm ever not gonna love you, so… so whatever! I-It's…! It's… whatever... It's whatever…"

Hope was never able to say it.

She shunned herself from even thinking it.

That three-word sentence…

Hope couldn't admit it to herself, because…

It hurt too much.

Hope always thought that the person she chose could never love her back.

But Newt said it.

And Newt was the person Hope chose.

This blushing mess standing before her was…

He was the boy she loved.

Hope loved him.

She just loved him.

"I…" She was terrified, but Hope looked into Newt's eyes nonetheless. "I love you."

"Huh…?" Newt's blush left his face. "Sorry, what did you just-"

"I've been in love with you since I met you, Newt," Hope confessed while tears formed in her eyes. "I love you so much that it's stupid. I-It's stupid how much I want to be around you, and how much I just wanna talk to you. Gosh, it's just…" Hope awkwardly glared down at her feet. "I-I don't even know what to say. I look so stupid! You had this whole thing, and I have nothing. I'm… honestly… so…"

Newt took back his one step backwards by taking one step forwards, positioning himself so that Hope could see him walk closer. His closeness wasn't what made her turn back into a tomato-faced mess, however. It was when the boy placed his hand underneath Hope's chin and made her gaze up into his own. The girl gulped upon seeing the fire within Newt's eyes. "N-Newt?"

"So," a boyish smile spread across Newt's face, "do you still think I'm cute?"

"Th-Th-That's what you're focusing on?!" Hope stammered out, and Newt only showed her a serious look in response. The girl had to glance away. "W-Well… It's just that… Um… Don't you already know? Especially now that I…"

"That you…?"

"You know."

"Do I?"

"W-Why are you teasing me?"

"I want you to say it again… Please?"

"Newt…" Hope couldn't resist those eyes. It was scientifically proven that she couldn't. Hence, regardless of her easily-embarrassed nature, Hope's eyes found Newt's once more. "...I love you."

A bashful smile spread across Newt's face before he leaned in. And, for the first time, Hope closed her eyes when he kissed her. Third time's the charm, after all. Newt could barely contain his happiness when he felt Hope kiss back, so when they eventually broke the touch, Newt cupped her cheek and pulled her back in. Behind Hope, the sun had fully set, causing the world to become illuminated by a dark-blue glow. It was almost like the Earth giving the two of them a moment, a moment where no one in the entire world but them… saw them. This was their moment that nobody could take away from them. Those two teenagers that had gone through so much, that had once given up on life, were more full of life than ever. And it showed in the way that they held each other, both of them clinging onto the source of their joy. Newt especially never wanted to let Hope go; he wanted her all to himself, which was why he couldn't stop kissing her.

Selfishly and possessively, Newt knew that Hope was at the top of a lot of other people's lists. So although it made him glad that so many people cared about her, that selfishly possessive side of him needed to know that this part of Hope was his and his alone.

"N-Newt, um…"

Newt grumbled when Hope broke one of their kisses. "What?"

"I-If you keep going, I think I might pass out!" Hope squeaked, latching her hands into Newt's shirt to keep herself steady. "And, well… You know I'm… not good at handling… stuff like this."

"...Sorry," Newt apologized while he wrapped his arms around Hope's back, helping her keep steady as well. "I just, uh… I've never felt this way before, so I don't know how to… control it."

"It's okay…" Hope took a deep breath and leaned her forehead against Newt's chest. "It's gonna be okay…"

All those years of pain, all those years of loneliness, all those years of nothingness, were worth it. Since, without them, Hope would have never met Newt. She wouldn't have met any of her other precious friends, who were alive or… sadly not. There truly had been light at the end of the tunnel, and Newt was the one who had led Hope there. Without a doubt, Newt was Hope's hope…

So it was sad that they'd have to be pulled apart so quickly.

A/N: I'm pretty sure someone already commented this, but yes, Hope and Newt's ship name is "Nope." Fight me.

(I think it's so funny, I'm sorry.)