His coaching session for the interviews with Brutus and Enobaria was a joke. The children from the Academy were trained on public appearances from the time they were 10. He knew how to play a crowd, answer Caesar's questions, get sponsors coming in. He had perfected his fake persona years ago. It came naturally to him now.
Eventually, all three of them admitted that they were simply wasting time and gave up. With free reign of his afternoon until the score's announcement after dinner, he chose to head down to the training room. Even after his display for the gamemakers, the memory of his dream was still all too fresh in his mind. He couldn't sit in his room or his shower pondering over his emotions anymore. All it led him to was missing Katniss, wondering how she did in her private session, how surprised the gamemakers were to see her with the bow, wishing he could have seen it himself. So instead, he decided to go break a few punching bags. He didn't think they would allow him in the training room anymore after today, it was now or never.
His feet carried him down the stairs quickly, but he almost tripped over them as he saw her. Katniss was walking up the stairs slowly, anger written across all her features. She looked about as angry as she had the last time he saw her when she was screaming at him. The fire in her eyes was burning bright again.
Jesus, what happened to her? Did she just now finish her training session?
He stopped for a moment, allowing himself to take in the sight of her. Bruise free, cut free, injury free, she was okay his dream wasn't real. He pushed all thoughts of it from his mind at confirmation.
"Katniss" he called to her as he flew down the last flight of stairs to her. She looked as if she had just noticed him now, too caught up in her rage to hear his pounding footsteps. When her eyes met his, he watched as all of the rage faded away. It was as if someone had popped a balloon, the way her face fell and the fire in her eyes was snuffed out. In place of it rose fear. Not the wariness he had seen on her face before, the nervous look she had at the tribute parade, her apprehensive look when she noticed the way Clove was glaring at her, no. This was fear like the way she looked after Prim's name was called.
"Katniss, what happened?" He asked, grabbing her by the shoulders. She flinched away from him, her eyes filling with tears. Suddenly, she pulled out of his grip and darted up the stairs. Her feet taking them two at a time as he stood in shock.
"Wait!" he called out after her as he began to chase her. They both raced up the stairs. His footsteps were clumsy as his body filled with panic.
Maybe she finally came to her senses. Maybe Peeta finally convinced her. Maybe she flinched because she is afraid of you again. Maybe…
His mind raced with possibilities as he saw her, two flights ahead of him, throw open the door to the roof and rush outside. He willed his legs to go faster. She was quick, much faster than him. His final push allowed him to reach the roof, his eyes darting around in search of her. For a moment, he felt bile rise in his throat at the thought of her throwing herself off. But he knew the capitol had built force fields to prevent that.
Finally, he spotted her. She was huddled in the corner of the garden, wind chimes tinkling above her head. From where he stood, he could hear her sobs. Even if they were muffled from the way her faced was shoved into her knees, her whole body was curled into a ball, wracked with grief. His heart twisted as he raced over towards her.
He knelt in front of her, approaching her the way he had before. He reached his hand out slowly, gently placing it on her shoulder. He relaxed when she did not flinch away this time, but instead her breath hitched. She lifted her face, revealing the tears streaming down her splotchy, red cheeks. Her eyes were swollen, nose a bright shade of red as she sniffled.
I thought after that nightmare nothing would be worse than seeing her scream in pain. But now, this is real, and I'm pretty sure the sight of her crying will be the death of me.
His heart shattered into a million pieces as he spoke, soft and calm, "Little flame, what's wrong?"
He had never called her that out loud, but some part of him hoped she would scowl and tell him she hated it. Instead, she whimpered and threw herself forward into his arms. He caught her, wrapping his arms around her and using one hand to rub her back. He could feel her tears seeping through his shirt onto his neck. He couldn't have cared less about that at the moment; all he was worried about was the way she was shaking in his arms.
"They're going to kill me." Her voice cracked as she said it.
I'll have to be a pile of ashes before I let that happen.
"Nobody is going to lay a hand on you Katniss." He vowed, squeezing her a little tighter. Her sobbing had relaxed into more of a quiet grief, tears still leaking from her face onto his shirt, still shaking, but her breathing had calmed.
"No, no, no, you don't understand. I messed up. I did something really bad. They're going to kill me or Prim or my mom or Gale, oh god, what if they kill you?" She was stressing out now, pulling back to look at him.
"I'm so sorry, I'm so – "He didn't let her finish.
"Katniss. Nobody is going to kill you. Nobody is going to hurt your family. Nobody besides Haymitch, Brutus, and Peeta knows that we even speak to one another. Nobody is going to kill me. Stop apologizing. Just breathe for a second, okay?"
He placed his hands on her face, wiping her tears with his thumbs the way he had before. She closed her eyes, taking a few deep breaths. She stopped shaking.
"That's good, a few more deep breaths for me, okay?"
She listened, breathing in and out three more times before she reopened her eyes. He let his hands fall from her face, smiling whenever she snaked her arms from around his back to grab his hands.
"Okay, just relax. Tell me what happened." He told her, squeezing her hands for comfort.
"I-I was all wound up whenever I went in for my private session. Peeta was saying all kinds of things to me, and I was just so fed up. I was relieved whenever they called my name." She told him
This fucking guy. Again.
"What kind of things?" He asked, already knowing the answer.
"The usual. The alliance is a bad idea, you're going to kill me, he had to join the Careers to protect me. I was just… already shaken up. And the bows in there… I'm just not used to using a metal bow. I never have before." She explained.
"What's you bow at home made of?" He asked. He was trying to keep her calm, asking useless questions so she didn't get herself worked up again.
"Wood. My father carved out of wood from a big oak tree. The arrows are wooden too. The metal bow is a lot heavier, and the string is just a bit too tight. I'm just- like I said, I've never shot one before. So when I went in, I missed my first target."
"By how much?" He asked. He knew the gamemakers would immediately ignore her after seeing that. Unless you hit somewhere on the rings, they'll just give you a five for knowing how to use a bow and label you as a bloodbath victim.
"Only about an inch, it wasn't even on the rings. I heard them laughing at me, but I just tried again anyways." She answered.
"Did you hit it that time?" He asked, if someone saw her hit it on the second try, she might have a shot at a decent score. He didn't want a target on her back with a super high score, but he didn't want her getting a low score and sponsors overlooking her.
"Of course I did, bullseye."
Fuck, I've only ever hit the exact bullseye a few times. The innermost rings I can hit consistently, but bullseye is a lot harder than it looks. Even with training. Was she used to hitting bullseye every single time? Jesus.
"Did they see you?" He asked. That would get a high score.
The anger was back. Her voice became annoyed as she answered, "No. Not one of them was watching me, they all were looking at this stupid roast pig!" She spit.
"Relax, so what did you do then?" He asked, trying to calm her again. Her hands were squeezing his very tight. She met his eyes as she gave her response.
"I shot the apple out of the pig's mouth."
Cato didn't say anything. He just sat there staring at her.
No fucking way she shot an arrow at the gamemakers.
Oh, but the move was so Katniss. Only the girl on fire would be the one to demand attention in such a manner.
She spoke again, "-and then I just, really dramatically, bowed at them and I said 'thanks for your consideration' and left."
The mental image of her giving the gamemakers a sarcastic bow, sneering at them. Fuck, it was almost as bad as his stunt. She had basically told the gamemakers to go to hell.
Cato couldn't help it. He tried to hide it, but instead he started to laugh. She scowled at his reaction, which made him burst out laughing. He could barely breathe, a stitch forming in his side as he wheezed. He knew there was a reason why he loved her so much, why he was willing to give up everything for her. His little flame was incomparable to anyone else. Nobody else in the country would have the balls to do that to the gamemakers. Nobody else would think to sneer at them afterwards. Katniss was one of a kind. If he could, he would kiss her senseless right now.
"Stop laughing at me. It's not funny." She broke her hand from his and smacked his arm, but as she scolded him she started to laugh.
"C'mon Katniss. That's some of the best shit I've ever heard." He choked out through his laughter. Katniss's laughter joined his. He loved the sound of her laugh, the way she smiled. After seeing her break down, he thanked whatever higher power existed that he was able to get her back to smiling and laughing.
"Okay, I'll admit that in hindsight of my massive meltdown it's kind of funny." She said, catching her breath. "I'm sorry for that by the way." She added.
He shook his head at her, "Don't worry about it. I have more shirts, feel free to ruin all of them."
Ruin everything I own for all I give a shit Katniss. It's all yours anyways.
She cocked her head at him silently, narrowing her eyes as she looked at him. She was trying to decipher him, and it made him nervous. His hand twitched in hers under her gaze.
He averted his gaze choosing to stare at their hands instead.
"Thank you" she squeezed his hand.
"For?" He allowed himself to look back up for a moment.
There was that look in her face again. The one he could never understand. She was smiling at him, but everything else was unreadable.
"For being there… and making me feel better." She explained.
Anytime little flame. I'll always take care of you.
"Of course, that's what friends do right?" He stopped himself from cringing at the reminder. She narrowed her eyes at him, that look on her face popping up for a moment before she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him.
This is the first time they had ever hugged without needing to. The first time, Cato had basically told her all his darkest secrets. Reliving his dark past had been hard for him, and a difficult reality to face for her. They were both upset, so the comforting gesture made sense. Just earlier, Katniss had been having a meltdown. The stress of the games had gotten to her, even if what she did was totally badass. That hug had been to help relax her.
But this one, was entirely voluntary, and she had initiated it.
She wants to be close to me.
His heart soared as he hugged her back. He took deep breaths in. She smelled like the rain, like she belonged in the woods. She smelled exactly how you'd expect a huntress to.
"Yeah, that's what friends do." Her voice sounded pained. Cato chalked it up to her still recovering from all that had happened.
The last thing I want to be is just your friend, but I'll take what I can get.