Chapter 115

The set up failed.

The team transported the man purporting to be Jimmy Vong via police entourage. They made it to the parking garage where it was anticipated Rathborne would take action to assassinate his target. Whether the team was too jumpy or he was never going to attempt to act on that day, the set up ended in disaster.

At the Precinct, having heard the entire roll out of the plan and seen its dismal failure, Beckett and Castle retreated to the breakout room to debrief and figure out what went wrong.

The team were on their way back to the Precinct and the Captain was finishing up things with the DA, Coonan's lawyer and paperwork to discharge Coonan.

With the door closed, Beckett slumped on the couch her hands to her forehead, "I let her down."

Castle who leaned against the kitchen counter watched over Kate, aware she was going through some serious emotional shit right now. He crossed his arms, then his ankles. He quietly said, "No. You didn't."

"Rathborne is in the wind, Dick Coonan is about to walk." She sat up and looked at him, "You're a hundred grand down."

"So what? It's nothing."

"I must have missed something."

He shrugged, "Honey, it could have been me. Rathborne could have checked the routing number and realised the money was coming from my account, not Dick's. It was arrogant of me to be brazen."

Beckett sighed, "I didn't think you were arrogant, Castle. I thought what you did was sweet and I will pay you back one day."

"Negative, Ghost Rider. Small price to pay for a shot at your mother's killer."

Beckett's brow furrowed in thought and Castle didn't miss it. He immediately recognised that expression. "What, Beckett?"

She brightened with hope, "Oh my God, Castle, I did miss something." She stood up suddenly and went to Castle.

"What?"

She smiled, momentarily pinched her bottom lip, "Umm… Her killer."

"What?"

"Rick, Coonan said it was a hundred grand to catch her killer."

Castle lit up and stepped to her as she stood, "And you never told him it was your mother that was murdered."

"No. Not once." Her gaze shot out through the windows to the hallway where Coonan was currently being relieved of cuffs by LT.

"Oh my God, Castle. We have to stop him."

Beckett was gone like a flash and flew out the door with Castle chasing her. Long legged she paced across the bullpen to intercept Coonan as he made his way to the elevator foyer.

"Hey, we need to talk." She called out and confidently stepped directly in front of Coonan who had no choice but to stop, surprised by her sudden appearance. Castle joined Beckett at her side fully aware that Coonan who was of equal size to him, could easily push Beckett out of the way. She could hold her own but his male instincts were too strong to ignore

"There was no Rathborne," she accused. "That was just a cover up. It was you."

"Clever girl." Coonan smiled, drew a gun, grabbed at Castle and shoved the gun into Castle's back. It all happened in the blink of an eye. There was a scramble. Startled, Castle struggled to maintain his balance, to escape as he was pulled back against Coonan. "All right ah ah ah ah." He cried out his eyes seeking Beckett drew her gun. She had her pistol pointed at Coonan's head, but she wasn't clear to take a shot. He used Castle as protection. She could aim for his forehead but she risked Castle taking a bullet. Nobody else in the bullpen had noticed what was going down. The second one did, she knew all hell would break loose.

"Now here's what's going to happen." Coonan quietly and calmly said also noticeably aware of how many unaware cops surrounded them. "We're just going to stroll on over to the elevator together, nice and easy."

Beckett quietly said, "That'll never happen."

"You make a sound," Coonan quietly threatened, "If you attempt to signal, you so much as clear your throat and I'll put a round in this man's liver and he will die slowly and in considerable pain." He shoved the gun deeper into Castle.

"Ahhh." Castle cried out his eyes staying on Kate's.

"Let's go." Coonan started stepping towards the foyer, causing Beckett to follow. "What, no pithy remarks from the peanut gallery? Not so funny facing your own death is it?"

Castle gritted his teeth, the anger started to surface and his eyes remained on Beckett who had her gun pointed at Coonan but her eyes were flicking between the two men. "I don't know, Dick, you tell me. Last time I checked this was a police station." Castle spoke loud enough to raise attention. Beckett wished him to stop. Then from behind him, Beckett saw the Captain finally see what was happening. Her heart pounded.

"You knew before I arrested you, didn't you?" She asked, "You knew my mom was your victim."

"It wasn't personal, okay? She was just another job," Coonan replied.

"She was my mother." She stressed, then paused and with a deeper stronger voice she said, "Who hired you to kill her?"

"Forget it, you'll never touch him, he'll bury you."

"Tell me who." She glanced to the Captain who had a gun aimed and was ready to shoot. "No no no, sir." She called out, "I need him alive."

"That's right," Coonan replied, "You do need me." He said directly to Beckett, "Now, back him off or Castle dies."

Beckett shot glances at the Captain, then louder said, "Sir, back off please."

Montgomery who held his gun pointed at Coonan's head replied, "You know I can't do that."

"Hey, you want to learn who ordered the hit on your mommy, you had better make sure I make it out of here." Coonan dragged Castle backwards.

Beckett's eyes stayed on Castle's eyes that hadn't moved from hers. "Roy, please."

"That's right, Roy, nice and easy, nice and easy."

And then everything shattered out of control.

Beckett found her opportunity and shot Coonan in the chest.

He was flung back. His arms fell from Castle who scrambled away.

Coonan hit the floorboards. He was dead seconds after.

Beckett cried out, stumbled over to the floor. She slid the hand guns out of Coonan's reach and commenced to perform CPR on the body, desperate to keep him alive.

The crowd of detectives watched Beckett work on the body of a dead man for the time it took the paramedics to arrive.

She sat back when she had depleted herself of energy, panting and crying. Her hands were soaked with Coonan's blood. Castle instinctively stepped in to stop her from further attempts to revive Coonan.

"Kate, he's gone, come away," he said.

Beckett held up bloodied shaking hands.

Esposito who was at Castle's left shoulder ordered. "Castle, get her away."

Whatever it was Castle snapped out of the semi-trance he'd been in leaned over, wrapped his arm around Kate and with relative ease he hoisted her off the floor into his strong hold. She cried out in objection. Ragged breathes, a tight and stiff body in his arms. He felt the trauma inside of her.

This was the woman who had just saved his life and was in shock. Like a robot, he simply followed Esposito, his mind fogged and panicked. His heart thumped as hard and fast as Beckett's. His ears were ringing, and he could hear the thump of his blood pressure. Things were being said to him, but he no longer heard words. Only sounds. There was an awareness the paramedics had called Coonan as deceased. He knew they were in the break room, and he was guided Castle to the sink.

"Castle." He heard and a hand gripped his upper arm. "Hold her still," Esposito quietly ordered. "You're both shaking like mad."

Castle nodded. Obeyed. Kate was on her feet, but he held her steady, and she leaned against him. He was partially aware she was in shock. Her body was shaking worse than her hands, but he found it difficult to identify who trembled more.

Esposito turned the water on and found soap.

"Kate?" Esposito said to gain her attention. "Breathe."

She sucked in air. Castle did too but drew in a deeper breath.

"Wash your hands."

For several seconds she stared at her hands then with Esposito's coaxing she reached out and placed her hands under the water.

"It's cold."

Esposito immediately increased the temperature and poured liquid soap over her hands. She begun to urgently scrub at hands, cries of repulsion coming from her to be-rid herself of Coonan's blood.

Castle's deep breathes brought him closer to reality than he'd been a minute or so ago. With his eyes closed, he listened to Beckett's distressed whimpers, to Esposito consoling and efforts to bring her out of shock. In his arms her body shook while his imagination relived the terror of the loaded gun pushed into his back. It was an horrific scene they'd left. A man of equal size to Castle lay dead in the bull pen in a pool of blood, because of a fleeting second of misfortune. Castle had scraped close to death's door and he sensed the reality of it.

Beckett began to struggle against him and he felt her abdomen heave.

"I'm gonna be sick." She cried out.

Castle released her and stepped away just as two paramedics also approached him. He pointed at Kate.

"Please. Help her."

"No, you need to take a seat, Sir." A tall blond woman said, placing her hand on his upper arm.

Castle stared at the female paramedic. She was pretty, young, but she appeared all bright, fluorescent. The lights overhead were dark and the walls bright. There was a moment he feared he was going to pass out.

He reached for Esposito. "Help me, Espo, I don't feel so well."

*. *. *. *

The team and witnesses were released once the investigative squad had finalised their initial interviews of everyone present when the shooting event occurred. The firearm-investigative team completed their scene investigation and submitted a summary report to the Captain clearing Beckett of any wrongful action. Montgomery told Beckett and Castle to have a patrol unit take them to their respective homes to avoid the media frenzy out front of the Precinct. However, wearing dark clothing and beanies, they used the rear fire escape and left unnoticed via the garage. They walked to the nearest railway station and rode the subway to Kate's home. They barely said a word in the train, but stared at each other, their non-verbal communication heightened by the trauma. Their walk from the station to the apartment was brisk.

Once Beckett had the lights switched on in her apartment she went directly to her fridge, took a glass bottle out of the freezer, twisted the lid off it and tipped it to her lips. It was cold, wet and contained a high percentage of alcohol. She felt Castle's eyes on her as she consumed two healthy mouthfuls of the bitterly cold liquid. She then held the bottle out to him, saw him think. The plastic bags he had carried into the apartment were dumped on the counter and he relieved her of the bottle.

"Why not. Cheers," he said and downed a couple of mouthfuls. He coughed, pushing the bottle back to Beckett. He stripped his body of the coat and beanie.

"Yep. Why the fuck not?" She drank more then held out the bottle to him.

Castle waved off any more. "I'll save it," he said as he turned to the bags, "I didn't know what you felt like so I ordered sushi, I got some Italian, some Thai and was even able to order in hot dogs."

"I can't believe you have the doorman on your side already, accepting orders for us." She pulled the beanie from her head and left it on the counter top.

"Well, you can't have people just coming up here and I slipped him a tip …" he paused, sensing something and looked to Beckett who was about to fall apart. "Hey." His voice was soft. He stopped what he was doing and reached for her left hand. "I'm sorry, Kate, that it rolled out like it did. We almost had him."

Beckett squeezed his hand, "It wasn't your fault, you know."

"I overstepped. I'm sorry." He stepped to Kate and embraced her.

Beckett rested her head against his chest, "No. If it wasn't for you, I would have never found my mom's killer. And someday soon, I'm going to find the sons of bitches who had Coonan kill her, and I'd like you around when I do."

"I'll be here with you. Now, you need to eat." He let her go, "So what will it be?"

"Thai."

"I knew it."

"And wine."

"How about whisky?"

"Even better." The bottle of vodka was returned to the freezer. "Thank God we got your money reversed, Rick."

"Yeah, that was a lucky strike, that the bank could do it."

"Big transfer."

"Good bank." Castle carried cartons of food to the coffee table. "No TV, Hon. It will be all over the news."

"I know. Did you call Martha? Alexis?"

"I did. You just weren't with it at the time, and I was barely cohesive. I just called her to tell her we were fine."

"Oh." She sat to his right and placed two tumblers of bourbon on the coffee table then reached for the container of noodles. Before she started, she asked. "Rick, how did you feel after it all happened? He had the gun pressed into you and all I could think about was I couldn't lose you."

He took a moment to think, and he looked at her eyes. "Hey. It's over. Don't get upset."

"I'm okay," she softly replied even though she wasn't. "How-?"

"I was terrified, Kate. I don't remember some things. I wanted to protect you, take you away from him. It gets vague but I was aware of Esposito's presence and at some stage you were sick."

She shrugged. "I don't recall that. There's a lot then a patch of nothing and then I was on the couch, and you were there."

"Yeah, I think you went to a dark place for a bit," he said. "You didn't say much for a few minutes."

"We should eat," she said, "Foods going cold."

"Or forget the food and get absolutely wasted."

With the carton of noodles open she dug around with the fork. "Not a bad idea."

They picked at their dinner. Although they hungered for food, they lacked appetites which caused Kate to switch foods a few times, but nothing hit the spot.

The food dismissed, Kate went to the bedroom, extracting herself out of the clothes she'd changed into after the shooting. The firearm detectives had asked for the clothing she'd worn when she had discharged her Police gun. She would have them returned, clean, in the next few days. Alone in the bathroom, she stood beneath the shower and soaked her body, her hair and just stood there letting the hot water cascade down her, washing the day away and the feint smell of iron on her fingers, the blood beneath her nails.

While she showered, Castle made every attempt to relax. The couch was perfectly comfortable, the lamp provided a pleasant ambience and the apartment was warm but he was unable to settle. The TV was running with the volume down low but he could hear it. He needed to know what the media knew. It wouldn't be a good idea for Kate to watch so soon after the event, but it was imperative he know what others were seeing before he communicated with anyone. His manager, for instance, had been trying to make contact but rather than talk to her, he'd sent a simple text stating he was okay and safe. He had a glass of whisky he was taking his time with.

Coonan's death was all over the news. It was big news in New York into the late night, and Beckett was in the thick of it all. Images of Beckett mostly standing to the side of Captain Montgomery during media announcements were repeatedly shown. Luckily, Castle was of minor attention, but the media had somehow received information that caused them to suspect he'd been quite involved. The story had reached California. His cell phone hadn't stopped with incoming calls and texts from friends on the west coast. Even Meredith had tried to call him. He'd switched it to silent at the Precinct. On the coffee table, Beckett's Police phone was continually buzzing and chirping, to the point he had silenced it during their dinner.

His family. As a priority he had called his mother and daughter after everything calmed down, after Esposito had encouraged him away from Beckett, after Coonan's body had been removed by ME Parish and her team, and after the shock had subsided. His mother had been memorising lines and his daughter had been studying. Luckily, they heard from him before the event was publicly known and became leading broadcast news. His call hadn't stopped Alexis from losing it at him. Castle had chosen to spare them the details. Alexis had made it clear he had already survived a bombing and then he had almost died in a shooting incident.

He exhaled slowly his head lulling against the back of the couch. He reminded himself that his body functioned perfectly, that there wasn't so much as a scratch on him. Nothing hurt, not a muscle ached. However, his brain was scrambling to deal with what had gone down so quickly. Seconds felt like hours. He still tasted sour bile in his throat a taste that whisky didn't swish away. While Coonan had held him, a gun pointed into his back, he'd heard his own pulse in his ears. His spine had been chilled and he had held onto his composure with his sight locked on Beckett. If he had experience death, she was the last thing he wanted to see. The terror had shown in her eyes, yet she had maintained composure, trusted her training and had overcome the problem. She killed another man to save him and for that his love for her had taken on a whole new level. They often kidded around about saving each over but she had proven her word that day.

Even though he did not suffer from physical injuries, he couldn't cease an urge to be at home, to hideaway within the secure confines of his office and bedroom. He was certain if he succumbed to it, his family would be at him, asking questions, expecting answers, delivering opinions. The want to be with Kate was strong, to keep her company while she was in her own land of hell was important for him for him to undertake. Not only had she taken a life to save his, she had also lost the chance to learn who had ordered the hit on her mother. After Coonan had been declared deceased and the body had been removed, Beckett and Castle had been questioned separately. Every officer who had been present in the bullpen had been questioned.

Beckett was not allowed to return to work tomorrow. Instead, she was required to schedule counselling sessions and she had to pass a psych evaluation before was granted permission to return. Montgomery had ordered he also attend. Tonight, was Beckett's first fatal engagement of her weapon. How well she had handled herself was a testament to her nature.

She came from the bathroom, bare feet, her wet hair combed back from her face and wearing a black slip that stopped at the top of her thighs. He barely noticed her as she approached. "Castle? Are you alright?"

He raised his head, gave her the hint of a smile. "Mm." He shifted so he was more erect, less laid back, and reached out with his right arm, signalling he wanted her to come to him. "Just would like a minute to hold my girl." His tone was so endearing it caused Kate to smile for the first time in hours.

She took his hand as she lowered herself to his right thigh and he adjusted his body to accept her comfortably. Her body folded into his and she placed her left arm around his shoulders cupping his head with her palm. He wrapped his arms tightly around her body bringing her as close to him as possible.

She whispered soothingly, "It's okay. I love you."

"I love you too. Thank you, Kate. I know you don't like paperwork but thank you for saving me."

Kate squeaked in amusement. "You don't like paperwork. I didn't want to have to tell Martha or Alexis that I'd failed to protect you, failed you."

"Never will you fail me." His palm glided the length of her right thigh from her knee to her hips and up her body. He inhaled deeply then slowly released the air, the tension.

"You didn't take your eyes from me," she murmured.

"I couldn't."

She pressed her forehead to his.

"I thought you were going to be the last thing I would see. Closest to death I've ever been."

"You're not hurt?" She asked in a whisper, her fingers combing through his hair and she visually inspected him.

"No. You?"

"Mentally, I'm exhausted."

"Mm. Same. Little shaken now the experience has had time to sink in."

"It will take it out of you for a few days. I'm here when you need me." She softly said then pressed her lips to his temple.

"Thank you." He smiled against the hand that gently cupped the side of his face and for several moments he really soaked up the affection Kate offered him. His arm that was loosely looped around her tightened bringing her body against his.

"You told your Mom you're good?"

"Yes but I skipped the details."

"Good. I never share much with my Dad."

"I know. It pisses him off. I called him to tell him you were safe," he said.

"You really are working on my Dad."

"Have to have him on side if I want to marry you, one day."

Kate sat back to look at his eyes a smile spreading. "Really, you want to marry me?" She was mostly teasing.

"Since the moment I laid eyes on you."

She pressed her lips to his temple again. "Did you speak to Alexis?" Her tone was cautious. He squeezed her.

"Don't," he softly said.

"Don't what?"

"Don't be afraid of her, of how she will be."

Kate brought herself in closer against him. "Sorry."

"I debriefed both of them, but they don't know much so if they ask you questions, just keep it general. No one but us needs to know what happened."

"Okay."

Kate opened her eyes to the TV when her name was said by a reporter.

"How are you handling all this?" Castle asked watching the TV the mug shot of Coonan on screen. Then footage of Coonan was shown in a corporate scene. Old footage of Beckett came on screen and there was yours truly right beside her.

"I have to live with myself that I took a life." She pointed at the screen. "How short is my hair back then."

"It was cute," he replied then said, "Coonan murdered your mother, Kate. He literally confessed it."

Kate sat up her hands to his shoulders. "I know. Nobody but you and I heard him say that," she said in hushed tones.

"I didn't say anything during the interviews. I thought it might imply you had motive to pull the trigger."

"I did have motive." Kate inhaled deeply as she stared at Castle. "You," she whispered.

"That was selfish of you." He momentarily squinted, then stroked damp hair from her eyes, "Thank you for saving me."

"I didn't believe what he said, Castle. I pushed it to the back of my mind to focus on keeping you here with me."

"It stays between you and me." He pointed at the TV, "It's all over the news."

"It will be for a couple of days," she replied. "Newspapers tomorrow. Nothing next week."

"Well, this means we just lay low for a few days."

She shrugged. "No one will notice us."

"Maybe not." He touched her head, felt her wet hair. "You need to go dry your hair before we go to bed. I need a shower."

As she moved Rick assisted with a boost until she stood. She reached for his hand to help him up

"C'mon, Castle."