Hold my hand
A Top Gun: Maverick story
Pairing: Lt. Natasha 'Phoenix' Trace & L.t. Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw
Mentioned: Hangman, Maverick, Goose, Carole.
Chapter one
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The moment that Lieutenant Natasha Trace saw Lieutenant Bradley Bradshaw walk in that bar again, her heart nearly stopped.. It had been months since she had seen him and she wasn't even aware that he was states side again.
Not many were aware but the two of them had been an item, on and off for quite a long time and it was only Brad's tendency to pull away from her when they got anywhere near close in the vicinity of emotional vulnerability that ended their time together so when she saw him walk into the bar wearing his signature aviators and Hawaiian shirt, and jeans, part of her wanted to run to his arms, but she stopped short, instead making a tiny little quip about it but inside she was silently aching and hurting.
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Seeing him when he sat down at the piano, playing, singing and having fun, she saw the man she fell in love with, the man she once thought she could settle down and have a future with till he kept pulling away from her, opting in for some of the most dangerous missions and she knew those feelings were still there. They never left her. Now she just needed to figure out what to do with them.
Bradley knew that Natasha was the one, they had met when they were at the Naval academy, and they hit it off, but his past was something he always hid from everyone because he didn't want the the pity. All he had told Natasha about his past was his folks had both passed away and that it was too painful to talk about. He couldn't let himself get close to her because he was so afraid he would lose her like he lost his parents.
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When he saw her though at the Hard Deck bar, he had no idea she would be one of the pilots called for this new mission, and he almost lost his swag as he walked in, but he collected himself in time. Trying to keep it casual as he talked to her, seeing how close she appeared to be with Hangman made him slightly jealous, though he knew there had been nothing happen between Jake and Natasha, yes he may have asked around, he was still slightly jealous because he loved her.. No scrap that, he was in love with her.
It made him happy when he saw her walk over to him and sing with him at the piano, he reminded him of better times, when his parents were still around and he was close to his Uncle Pete.. While he was only around 4 years old when his father was killed in that training exercise, he still remembered that day when he and his Mom went to visit his Dad and Uncle at the Top Gun School in Miramar, and how they sang at the piano to Great Balls of Fire. It was one of the last times he had ever seen his father alive.
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After his father died, he saw his mother grief and watched her never be able to move on till her own death from cancer. He missed his father as well and while his grief as a four year old little boy losing his father was different to that of his grief as a nearly eighteen year old young man losing his mother, he vowed not to get close to anyone because he couldn't go through the pain of losing a loved one or watching a loved one lose someone.
Sitting on the ground after going head to head with Maverick, he sighed softly shaking his head.. As much as he was angry with Maverick and resented him, he still admired him as well and wished things had been different. He had been close with Pete growing up, and then things took a turn when he found out Maverick had been the one to pull his application from the Naval Academy which essentially set him back four years. He hadn't spoken to Maverick since then, even though Pete had tried to contact him through the years and had kept an eye on him in the Navy.
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Bradley felt her presence before he saw her, and he swallowed hard as he looked up and saw her in his view, he knew she was going to go hard on him now, and he deserved it.. He shouldn't have gone below the hard deck, and challenge Pete but it was his instinct to finally have that showdown with him. "Breaking the hard deck? Insubordination? Are you trying to get kicked out?", she broke the silence between them finally, looking at him.
He didn't want to do this⦠He wasn't ready to do this so he shook his head, "Don't worry about it". She wasn't going to take him saying that and he knew as much, "Look, I'm going on his mission but if you get kicked out, you leave us flying with Hangman.. Talk to me Brad, what the hell was that?" His elbows on his knees, he lowered his head for a moment, before he looked back at her, "He pulled my papers". Natasha was confused, looking at him as she squinted at him, the sun setting behind them, "What? Who?"
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All this time they had been together and he never had told her this, he had managed to keep it to himself this whole time, "Maverick. He pulled my application for the Naval academy, he set me back four years". This had Natasha sit up a little straighter and focus on him more, their hands resting close to each other's, "why would he do that?"
Sighing one long big sigh, Brad looked over at her, "I can't do this Tash", he stood up as though he was going to walk away and just as she was letting her head drop, her heart sinking into her stomach, thinking this could have been the moment he opened up to her, he held out his hand to her, shaking his head, "Not here", he added hoping that his extended hand would show her he was finally ready to open up to her once and for all.
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