Hold my hand

A Top Gun: Maverick story

Pairing: Lt. Natasha 'Phoenix' Trace & L.t. Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw

Mentioned: Hangman, Maverick, Goose, Carole.

Chapter two

π‘‡π‘œ 𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑙 π‘šπ‘’ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 π‘šπ‘’

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, π‘’π‘£π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘¦π‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘” 𝑀𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 π‘œπ‘˜π‘Žπ‘¦

𝐼 β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘‘ π‘“π‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘£π‘’π‘›π‘  π‘‘β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘’π‘‘π‘  β„Žπ‘Žπ‘£π‘’ 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 π‘”π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘¦

After they were dismissed for the afternoon, instead of going to the Hard Deck like everyone else, Natasha and Bradley stayed on base and after dressing in civvies, went back to Rooster's living quarters for dinner and a few beers so they could continue this conversation. After they ate and finished cleaning up, they sat down on the couch each nursing a new beer.. "Okay, so talk to me Rooster, what's going on? Why did Captain Mitchell pull your naval academy application papers? And why does it seem that you and Maverick have history?"

Taking a sip of his beer, he swallowed and then sighed, his arm resting on the back of the couch, "You know how I told you both my folks had already passed?", he was careful in his words as he thought out everything and what he wanted to say. She nodded her head in confirmation, "I remember". This was it, the moment of truth.. His heart was pounding and he felt nauseous, "I haven't told anyone this, but my Dad was in the Navy as well.. and he and Maverick flew together. He was Maverick's RIO".

𝑃𝑒𝑙𝑙 π‘šπ‘’ π‘π‘™π‘œπ‘ π‘’, π‘€π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘ π‘šπ‘’ 𝑖𝑛 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘Žπ‘β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘” π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘šπ‘ 

𝐼 𝑠𝑒𝑒 π‘‘β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’'π‘Ÿπ‘’ β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘‘π‘–π‘›', π‘€β„Žπ‘¦'𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ π‘‘π‘Žπ‘˜π‘’ π‘ π‘œ π‘™π‘œπ‘›π‘”

π‘‡π‘œ 𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑙 π‘šπ‘’ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 π‘šπ‘’? 𝐼 𝑠𝑒𝑒 π‘‘β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’'π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘‘π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 π‘‘π‘œ π‘ β„Žπ‘œπ‘€ π‘šπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘”π‘Žπ‘–π‘›

𝐡𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑓 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑑𝑒𝑐𝑖𝑑𝑒 π‘‘π‘œ, 𝐼'𝑙𝑙 π‘Ÿπ‘–π‘‘π‘’ 𝑖𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘  𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑒 π‘€π‘–π‘‘β„Ž π‘¦π‘œπ‘’, 𝐼 π‘€π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 𝑙𝑒𝑑 π‘”π‘œ 𝑑𝑖𝑙𝑙 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ 𝑒𝑛𝑑

Moving a little closer to him, she rested her hand on his knee and sighed softly, knowing there was more to it than just that, "What happened?" Taking her hand in his, lacing their fingers together, it finally felt right after all this time to tell her what really happened to his father. "They were being trained at Top Gun and they were in the air during a training exercise and from what I have been told, Maverick flew through another pilot's jet wash and spun out of control towards sea, they had to eject and my Dad ejected before the canopy of the f-14 they were flying in cleared and broke his neck".

Her hand that was on his knee squeezed a little more as he spoke, his voice filled with pain and emotion, her heart breaking for him. She had always wanted him to be more vulnerable and now here he was, pouring his heart out about how his father died and how his past was now coming back to haunt him in terms of being taught by none other then the man who was in the cockpit at the time of the incident that led to his father's death.

π‘†π‘œ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘‘π‘œπ‘›π‘–π‘”β„Žπ‘‘

𝐡𝑒𝑑 π‘‘π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑙𝑒𝑑 π‘”π‘œ π‘œπ‘“ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘π‘Žπ‘› π‘π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘’π‘£π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘™π‘Žπ‘ π‘‘ π‘‘π‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿ

𝐼 π‘€π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 π‘™π‘’π‘Žπ‘£π‘’ 𝑑𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝐼 π‘’π‘›π‘‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘ π‘‘π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π‘ƒπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘šπ‘–π‘ π‘’ π‘šπ‘’, 𝑗𝑒𝑠𝑑 β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

She could sense that he wasn't finished and waited for him to continue, his eyes filling with tears as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. He hadn't let himself cry like this in many years, and he had always been afraid of this, if he started, he wouldn't stop. "I was", he stopped, took a breath in and let it out slowly before he continued again, "I was only four years old when he died and while Mom never blamed him and the Navy cleared him from any wrong doing, I think Maverick still feels guilty and didn't want me to follow in my Dad's footsteps in case something happened to me.. My Mom had developed an aggressive form of leukemia and was dying around the time my application was pulled and I just have a feeling that he didn't want my Mom to have to deal with her son going into the academy when she was dying".

While he didn't know of his mother's request to Maverick to have his application pulled, he knew it had to do somewhat in part with his mother being sick, and while he did resent Pete for being the one to pull his application and setting him back years, something he would possibly never tell him was he was a little grateful at the same time. It turned out that when his mother passed, it would have been during when his studies at the Naval academy would have started and he wouldn't have been able to have time to mourn his mother's death.

π‘…π‘Žπ‘–π‘ π‘’ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘‘, π‘™π‘œπ‘œπ‘˜ π‘–π‘›π‘‘π‘œ π‘šπ‘¦ π‘€π‘–π‘ β„Žπ‘“π‘’π‘™ 𝑒𝑦𝑒𝑠

π‘‡β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘“π‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿ π‘‘β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘'𝑠 𝑖𝑛𝑠𝑖𝑑𝑒 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑀𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑑, 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑖𝑑 π‘‘π‘–π‘šπ‘’

𝐼 π‘π‘Žπ‘› 𝑠𝑒𝑒 π‘’π‘£π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘¦π‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘›π‘” π‘¦π‘œπ‘’'π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑏𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑑 π‘‘π‘œ π‘›π‘œπ‘€

π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘Žπ‘¦π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘  𝑀𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 π‘Žπ‘›π‘ π‘€π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘, 𝑙𝑒𝑑 π‘”π‘œπ‘‘ π‘€β„Žπ‘–π‘ π‘π‘’π‘Ÿ β„Žπ‘œπ‘€

"I'm so sorry Brad, I had no idea". She had no idea of any of this and she sighed softly as she tried to process this news. Her hand that was resting on his knee now moved to find his hand, lacing their fingers together, both of them looking down at their fingers laced together and then Rooster looked back up at her, "I struggled with Dad's death, Maverick was like a father figure to me growing up, he was always around and doing things with me that Dad should have been there to do with me.. I might have only been four years old but I remember him and it still breaks me apart knowing I lost all those years with him". He stopped for a moment to catch his thoughts and then continued, "I used to idolise Maverick, used to want to do everything with him you know.. He was the closest thing I had to a father after Dad's death and I clung to him.. I don't want to hate him or resent him but I don't know how not to anymore".

Nodding her head, she could start to understand his resentment towards Maverick and she sighed softly. "Why didn't you ever tell me any of this before?", she had to ask though she had a feeling she knew why. "I didn't want the pity or the looks that I always used to get whenever anyone who knew me and my history looked at me.. I wanted to know you wanted me for me, not because you felt some kind of obligation to be here for me or take care of me".

π‘‡π‘œ 𝑑𝑒𝑙𝑙 π‘šπ‘’ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 π‘šπ‘’? 𝐼 𝑠𝑒𝑒 π‘‘β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’'π‘Ÿπ‘’ 𝑏𝑙𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘‘π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑑 π‘‘π‘œ π‘ β„Žπ‘œπ‘€ π‘šπ‘’ π‘Žπ‘”π‘Žπ‘–π‘›

𝐡𝑒𝑑 𝑖𝑓 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑑𝑒𝑐𝑖𝑑𝑒 π‘‘π‘œ, 𝐼'𝑙𝑙 π‘Ÿπ‘–π‘‘π‘’ 𝑖𝑛 π‘‘β„Žπ‘–π‘  𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑒 π‘€π‘–π‘‘β„Ž π‘¦π‘œπ‘’, 𝐼 π‘€π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 𝑙𝑒𝑑 π‘”π‘œ 𝑑𝑖𝑙𝑙 π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ 𝑒𝑛𝑑

π‘†π‘œ π‘π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘‘π‘œπ‘›π‘–π‘”β„Žπ‘‘

𝐡𝑒𝑑 π‘‘π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 π‘¦π‘œπ‘’ 𝑙𝑒𝑑 π‘”π‘œ π‘œπ‘“ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π‘Œπ‘œπ‘’ π‘π‘Žπ‘› π‘π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘’π‘£π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘¦ π‘™π‘Žπ‘ π‘‘ π‘‘π‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿ

𝐼 π‘€π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 π‘™π‘’π‘Žπ‘£π‘’ 𝑑𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝐼 π‘’π‘›π‘‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘ π‘‘π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π‘ƒπ‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘šπ‘–π‘ π‘’ π‘šπ‘’, 𝑗𝑒𝑠𝑑 β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

Moving just a tad closer, their fingers still twined together, she rested her nose on his cheek and kissed the side of his face, "I always will want you for you Rooster", she shook her head, her eyes shining with tears as she spoke, "That will never change.. I've never stopped loving you, or wanting you Brad".

This was the point where he could have gotten up and walked away from the risk of hurting himself or hurting her again, but instead with Maverick's philosophy of don't think, just do in his head, his heart racing a little as his free hand cupped her cheek and he leaned in closer to her, not saying anything, just letting his lips find hers and he kissed her, pouring all of his emotions into that one kiss knowing that he had never stopped loving or wanting her either, still holding her hand, fingers entwined as she moved closer to him, his hand on her cheek moving to the back of her head as he cradled her, her own free hand moving to his cheek, her fingers gently tracing the scar on the right side of his face, before he pulled back slightly a few minutes later, catching his breath, "I've never stopped loving you and wanting you either Tash", he whispered in a softer voice, gazing into her eyes.

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ -

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

𝐼'𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 π‘Ÿπ‘–π‘”β„Žπ‘‘ β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’, β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ -

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

𝐼'𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 π‘Ÿπ‘–π‘”β„Žπ‘‘ β„Žπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘’, β„Žπ‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

Gazing into his eyes, she smiled softly, her hand still on his cheek, "What do we do now?", she asked, knowing that during this training mission, it wouldn't be appropriate for them to be a couple, or if they were going to, that they needed to be discreet about it… "Why don't we just see how it plays out? We can deal with the mission first and then work out everything else". Nodding her head, she could deal with that, she wasn't sure if Maverick would even pick either of them for the mission but she knew that once it was all over, she wanted to start a fresh with Brad. "I can deal with that, just know that I'm right here to hold your hand through all of this".

Nodding, he smiled and leaned in, kissing her again, "I know, and I'm right here to hold your hand as well". He could do this, he had never been this emotionally vulnerable with a woman before, but getting over that little bump, he knew he could make it work this time. As long as she was right there to hold his hand.

𝐼 π‘˜π‘›π‘œπ‘€ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’'π‘Ÿπ‘’ π‘ π‘π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘’π‘‘ π‘Žπ‘›π‘‘ π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿ π‘π‘Žπ‘–π‘› 𝑖𝑠 π‘–π‘šπ‘π‘’π‘Ÿπ‘“π‘’π‘π‘‘, 𝑏𝑒𝑑 π‘‘π‘œπ‘›'𝑑 𝑔𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑒𝑝 π‘œπ‘› π‘¦π‘œπ‘’π‘Ÿπ‘ π‘’π‘™π‘“

𝐼'𝑣𝑒 β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘‘ π‘Ž π‘ π‘‘π‘œπ‘Ÿπ‘¦, π‘Ž π‘”π‘–π‘Ÿπ‘™, π‘ β„Žπ‘’ π‘œπ‘›π‘π‘’ π‘‘π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘’

π‘‡β„Žπ‘Žπ‘‘ 𝐼 π‘€π‘œπ‘’π‘™π‘‘ 𝑏𝑒 β„Žπ‘Žπ‘π‘π‘¦ π‘Žπ‘”π‘Žπ‘–π‘›

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘,

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘, π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

π»π‘œπ‘™π‘‘ π‘šπ‘¦ β„Žπ‘Žπ‘›π‘‘

𝐼 β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘Ÿπ‘‘ π‘“π‘Ÿπ‘œπ‘š π‘‘β„Žπ‘’ β„Žπ‘’π‘Žπ‘£π‘’π‘›π‘ 

Author's Notes.

I've based this story on the Lady Gaga song Hold my hand which is on the soundtrack, and also beginning from a particular scene from the film. I've now seen this film three times and I'm feeling more and more excited over different ideas I have for the movie. I do feel after two more viewings, I can really see the chemistry between Phoenix and Rooster, and want to continue this further so I'm not sure yet if this will be a two chapter one shot or multiple chapters. I am also going to do some more stories on Top Gun Maverick, including Penny and Pete as a couple as well and maybe some past scenes of Pete and Penny and also between Maverick and Rooster and even Maverick and Ice. Maybe also some stories on Maverick and Charlie. One of my stories I already have written is Charlie dying of breast cancer, but in other stories I might change the story around and let that love story run it's course and them to fizzle out as I do think that Penny and Pete make so much more sense than Maverick and Charlie did now seeing it a few times.