Woman

Characters: Ikkaku, Heart Pirates. Rating: K+. Warnings: The menstrual cycle

So they had a woman in the crew. Just one woman, and to begin with this was the best thing that had ever happened to the Heart Pirates, to many minds. Of course, they quickly learnt that Ikkaku was as stubbornly badass to nakama as to a random group of men she barely knew, but that was no bad thing. They didn't need a nakama that couldn't pull their weight, and Ikkaku threw herself into life aboard the Polar Tang with a much vigour as any of the boys.

Having her around to laugh with them, fight with them, and generally be a nakama (but not a love interest, because she'd made it perfectly plain that she wasn't interested in any of that nonsense, and romantic relationships within a crew were often doomed to fail) was great, and not one of the men regretted the loss of their unisex crew status.

There was, however, one small thing that made itself quietly known over time, which most of them had conveniently forgotten about, either genuinely or deliberately. Ikkaku was a woman, and therefore dealt with a menstrual cycle. She didn't advertise it, to the relief of many, and most of the time they were completely unaware when it struck – which was just how they all liked it.

Some of the crew found out more often than others. Law, as the doctor, had reluctantly had a talk with her regarding what was normal, as part of his records on his crew's health, although he'd clearly wished he could palm that responsibility off on someone else. That had included the regularity of her cycle (not that anyone ever expected pregnancy to be a problem, Ikkaku included), so he was (regretfully) aware of the schedule. Bepo's more sensitive nose meant the Mink always knew, but once he'd been told it wasn't something to worry about he didn't share the information, to everyone's relief. The last member of the crew to usually find out was the cook, when his kitchen was raided for chocolate steadily for a week or so.

Beyond that, they tended to stay blissfully unaware, and that worked for everyone just fine. Ikkaku, for all that she loved teasing her nakama, was usually content to suffer in silence. If she got slightly more clingy at times, draping herself over random nakama instead of finding her own chair, no-one wanted to read too much into it. Besides, the woman could be scary when she wanted to be, so it was better for everyone involved if they accepted their temporary position as a cushion. It wasn't like they minded, anyway. As a whole the crew were physically affectionate, so no-one really needed a reason to create human cushions out of their nakama.

Then there were the months when things went wrong. The months that Ikkaku got inexplicably snappy for no reason and everyone guarded themselves with chocolate offerings, or the months when she ended up curled in a ball on the bathroom floor because it was worse than normal and no-one knew what to do but couldn't just leave her there so awkward cuddle piles ensued with the woman firmly in the centre.

And then, then there were the disasters. The times when she'd race to the infirmary and traumatise her poor captain (and anyone else in earshot) because for whatever reason she had nothing to use and had to improvise, which meant Law, desperately trying not to go completely red-faced, was put on the spot about finding some temporary measure because after one mortifying occasion involving toilet paper that everyone had forcibly removed from their memories, Ikkaku refused to settle for something that unreliable. No-one argued with her on that.

Such mishaps happened less and less through the years, not because Ikkaku got any better at remembering to stock up when supplies were low, but because her nakama slowly realised that they didn't have to be mortified at the idea of picking up a few things for her if they saw them (Ikkaku had a fond memory of a red-faced Shachi, clashing wonderfully with his hair, and an equally scarlet Clione shoving packages into her hands before fleeing), and that if everyone chipped in she wasn't going to be running out any time soon.

Well, that was a win-win situation for everyone involved.

I've been discussing this with a reader recently, and how the female pirates deal with their monthly fun is an interesting idea. It depends what's available in One Piece's universe, of course (reusable stuff would probably work best if they can get hold of it).

Thanks for reading!
Tsari