NOTE: The final chapter of this story.
Extra Chapter: Dragon Ball Kai Episode 3
Mira cleaned off the bar counter with a content smile. After they had finished watching DBZA things seemed to have gone back to normal. Though Natsu did attempt to shoot a Kamehameha earlier, he only ended up setting Gray on fire. The ice mage ended up stark naked and got into another fight with Natsu.
Looking over to her right Mira stared at the Lacrama they had used to watch the episodes. She had decided to create a little stand for it, just in case they ever wanted to watch it again. Walking over to it, Mira picked it up off the stand. She activated it and scrolled through all of the episodes they had watched. "Maybe I should rewatch a bit of it on my own. I'm sure the others won't really mind," She giggled to herself. As she was ready to start it up, something caught her eye.
"Kai episode 3? I don't remember us watching these," Mira mumbled to herself. "Maybe, the rewatch can wait a bit."
"So, we're going to watch a recap episode of the stuff we watched last week?" Lucy asked to make sure.
"Yup!" Mira nodded her head.
"Alright, I'm down," Lucy shrugged.
Currently, Mira had assembled Fairy Tail to watch one more episode that she had found. Didn't seem to be too long, so it wasn't going to inconvenience anyone. Mira enlarged the Lacrama and started it up.
ANDROID 16: Physical media is forever! Buy Laserdisc!
(Cuts to the outside of Capsule Corp)
YAMCHA: I-I'm just saying, I know it was stolen but it was still good music, right?
"Any stolen music is not good music," Gajeel huffed.
"How would you know what good music is? You can't sing," Natsu insulted him.
"Say that again, Salamander!"
"You heard me, metal mouth!"
"SHUT IT!" Erza forced them both to sit down.
BULMA: Yeah, because it was stolen from better artists.
KRILLIN: What about the dub score?
"The what score?" Wendy asked.
"I-I'm not sure," Levy shrugged.
YAMCHA: Oh yeah, let's start THAT flame war.
"A flame war sounds tasty!" Natsu exclaimed.
"I don't think that's what he meant," Lucy sweat dropped.
(Cuts to Vegeta)
VEGETA: FREEZA'S HERE!
KRILLIN: F*CK!
PICCOLO: OH MY GOD!
GOHAN: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
"And that escalated pretty quickly," Carla muttered.
"Do we really have to see Frieza again?" Lucy complained.
"Yeah, Freezer's here! And you know what that means, Lucy?" Natsu grinned.
A soft smile graced Lucy's lip. "Yeah, it means we'll see Trunks again."
(Cuts to Mecha Freeza, King Cold, and their army.)
MECHA FREEZA: That's right, buttholes! This is my resurrection! And you're all about to get F-(Trunks' sword slices through him, cutting him off. It makes a squelching noise as it slowly slices Freeza in half. The sword gets caught in Freeza's throat, struggling to fully cut through. Metal squealing was heard once Trunks' sword continued to cut through him. Blood starts gushing from Freeza's wounds.)
Everyone fell into a fit of laughter after seeing Frieza get cut off and Trunks' sword get stuck in his body.
"At least Frieza was dealt with quickly," Lucy said.
(Cuts to Krillin. Frieza's blood spewing all over his face.)
KRILLIN: …WHOO!
"WHOO!" Happy copied him.
"I wouldn't cheer about the blood part though," Lily shook his head.
[KAI OPENING SEQUENCE]
(Cuts to Krillin and Tien, then Trunks.)
KRILLIN: So, what's your deal?
FUTURE TRUNKS: I'm here because we have no female fanbase.
"Well, you do now~" Cana purred.
BULMA:(Camera pans closer to her. She winks at him.)Well, you do now~
FUTURE TRUNKS/LUCY: YOU NEED TO BE STOPPED!
[EXPLOSION]
(Cuts to Goku arriving in his space pod. All of his friends stand above the crater to welcome him home.)
GOKU: Hey, guys! I'm back and I'm off my meds!
"And you're about to be put back on them," Lisanna said.
"And he'll proceed to not take them at all," Erza sighed.
"He's allergic to-"
"I remember," Erza cut off Levy's quick reply.
(Cuts to Future Trunks and Goku talking privately)
FUTURE TRUNKS: Goku! The Red Ribbon Army has returned and-
GOKU: Only saw Z, who dat?
"We were in the same boat, but I actually don't get this joke," Levy frowned.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Listen! I'm from the future,(GOKU: Woah!) Bulma and Vegeta are my mom and dad,(GOKU: 'Kay…) and two "Androids" are going to show up to murder you all in three years!
"Well if we're just going to tear the Band-Aid off," Levy rolled her eyes.
GOKU: Whoa! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?
"No, you do that to yourself," Gray sighed.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Here's some heart medication. Don't not take it.
GOKU: …But will I?
"You won't," Erza grumbled.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Alright, I'm out.(Cuts to Future Trunks now in his time machine.) Bye, mom!
"WHY!?" Lucy questioned, baffled.
BULMA: What did he just-
FUTURE TRUNKS: (Chuckling) Just kidding! Hah, look at Vegeta's stupid shirt!(His time machine vanishes).
"Heh, it is pretty stupid," Gajeel laughed.
TENSHINHAN: More like "Saiyan pride parade", am I right?
VEGETA: I'm now going to breed the nearest female just to prove you wrong.
BULMA: Oh, cool.
"DON'T JUST BE FINE WITH THAT!" Lucy yelled.
"What's wrong with that, Lucy? We-"
"SHUT YOUR STUPID FACE!" She shoved a cupcake into his mouth.
PICCOLO: Should we be worried about the Androids?
"Nah, they're actually really cool people," Romeo answered.
"Except for Cell. It can burn in a hole," Wendy's smile creeped the boy out.
GOKU: Prolly.
[THREE YEARS LATER]
"We're just skipping all of that," Levy shrugged.
(Cuts to the city on fire, people are screaming.)
CRYING CHILD: FILLER-!(Child was crushed by falling debris.)
Everyone winced at the sight of the child dying, also feeling bad that her last words were 'filler'.
(Cuts to Goku)
GOKU: Guys!(Camera cuts to Android 19 and Dr. Gero) It's a set of "Androids"!
"Yeah, because we didn't know what the actual ones looked like, because Trunks sucks at explaining shit," Gajeel said.
(Cuts to Yamcha)
GOKU: And Yamcha's here.
YAMCHA: I am!?(Cuts to Dr. Gero stabbing his hand through Yamcha's chest.)
"Well, not anymore," Cana winced.
YAMCHA: (Squealing)
GOKU/NATSU: Yamchca's dead!
"No, he's not!" Lucy yelled at him.
YAMCHA: (Muffled) No, I'm not…!(Gero attempts to remove his hand from Yamcha's chest, but it gets stuck.)
DR. GERO: Come on, you…!(Fisting noises) Blasted ribs got caught on my sleeve!
"Not something you ever want to hear if someone stabbed you," Lily said.
"I wouldn't want to get stabbed, period," Macao said.
YAMCHA: (Crying)
GOKU: Need some help?
DR. GERO: How dare you? Nineteen, kill him!
(Cuts to Nineteen punching Goku in the face.)
GOKU: Argh!(Goku clutches his chest in pain) Ah, my heart!(He falls over).
Erza tries to not rip her own hair out in frustration.
GOHAN: Dad's dead!
"No, sweetheart, he's just taking a nap!" Mira yelled sweetly.
"That's not what taking a nap looks like," Lisanna scooted away from her sister a bit.
GOKU: No, I'm not-(Nineteen falls on top of him) AAUG!
"Well, you're about to be dead in a second," Levy winced.
"Until Prince jackass arrives," Gajeel added.
DR. GERO: Either the heart attack is going to kill him, or my Android is!(Cuts to Nineteen tightening his grip around Goku's throat) Either way, victory for Gero-
(Vegeta kicks Nineteen off of Goku).
ANDROID 19: Shit!
"Yup, he heard what Gero was about to say and wanted to stop that," Gajeel chuckled.
VEGETA: Vegeta… LIVES!
DR. GERO: Only saw Dragon Ball, who dis?
"I still don't get that joke!" Levy yelled, upset.
VEGETA: (Cuts to Vegeta turning into a Super Saiyan). BEHOLDMAHPOWAH!
DR. GERO: I feel like I underprepared for this.
"Because you did," Romeo said.
VEGETA: DO YOU AFRAID!?
DR. GERO: KIND OF!?
VEGETA: BAZINGAATTAC-KUH(Vegeta launches his Big Bang Attack and kills Nineteen.)
"The third time he's said a name related to this attack," Levy said.
ANDROID 19: F*ck!(Giant explosion)
ANDROID 19: (Disembodied head rolls on the ground) Fa-a-ther, I wish to be a real boy…
"That's not creepy at all…" Lucy shivered.
VEGETA: And now, to put the old man in a home: A FUNERAL home! I- AH…(Dr. Gero disappeared) Ah, shit. Damn, he runs fast for an old guy.
"Don't underestimate old people!" Makarov huffed.
(Cuts to Krillin in front of Gero's lab).
KRILLIN: Don't worry. I found his lab!
DR. GERO: F*ck! They found my lab.
(Cuts to the inside of Gero's lab as he turns on the lights.
DR. GERO: But luckily, I have two more Androids…the original Androids that were always a part of this story! (Gero activates 17 and 18) Yes, from the very beginning! And now, I shall awaken them!
"Wait, why didn't he just start with these two? Honestly, Gero gives scientists a bad name," Levy glared at the old doctor.
DR. GERO: Behold: My second greatest creations! (An upwards panned shot of 17 and 18).
"Was Cell the first?" Natsu wondered.
"He might be alluding to 16," Erza said.
ANDROID 17: F*ck's that mean?
"What? You're jealous?" Cana asked.
ANDROID 18: I dunno. Maybe he's referring to this? (18 stood in front of 16's capsule).
DR. GERO: No! Don't wake him up for some reason!
ANDROID 18: Pft… I'm gonna.
(Cuts to Future Trunks losing his shit).
FUTURE TRUNKS: NYYAAAAAAAA-!(Trunks destroys Gero's lab).
"Jeez, Future Trunks, what the shit!?" Wakaba shouted.
ANDROID 17: Duuuude! Caaaalm down!(17 and 18 were standing in the ruins of the destroyed lab, unharmed).
FUTURE TRUNKS: NO!
ANDROID 16: (Wakes up) Hello, I am Android 16. I am hilarious and you will- BIRDS BIRDS BIRDS GOKU.
"Hi, 16!" Wendy completely ignored his short-circuiting.
ANDROID 17: Hm. I like him!
(Cuts to them now on the highway with Vegeta glaring at them.)
VEGETA: Hey, c*nt!
All of the women just groaned at Vegeta.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Whao, Dad!
VEGETA: What? She's a c*nt! A c*nty c*nt! Whatcha gonna do about it, you big ol' c*nt!? Gonna c*nt all over me with your c*nty face, and your c*nty boots, and your… VAGINA!?
"I can't wait for what happens next," Mira said gleefully.
"Minerva would've enjoyed seeing this again," Erza said.
(Cuts to 18 brushing some hair out of her eyes.)
ANDROID 18: (Inhales)
(Cuts to Android 18 breaking Vegeta's arm with a kick).
VEGETA: AGH-
[ Eric Andre Show - We'll Be Right Back ]
Everyone fell out of their seats laughing at Vegeta's pain and the gag that was played.
(Cuts to each of the Z-Fighters laid out on the ground with Vegeta screaming in pain in the background).
VEGETA: AH! (Android 18 kicks him into the air) AH! AHH! (She stomps on his back, breaking his spine) BAUUUAGH! (He flips over onto his back, clutching his chest) AAAAAHHHH! (She breaks his other arm by stepping on it) AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
The laughter kept going as everyone watched Vegeta get what he deserved.
KRILLIN: I feel like we underprepared for this!
"Because you did," Romeo said.
(Cuts to the Androids standing in front of Krillin).
ANDROID 17: Hey! Don't bang my sister.
"Too late," Juvia giggled.
KRILLIN: Oh.
ANDROID 18: (Kisses him on the cheek) He might~
KRILLIN: Ohh!
ANDROID 17: But don't.
KRILLIN: Ohhhh…
"They fell in love, 17. There's no stopping love!" Juvia swayed in her seat.
ANDROID 16: He wants pussy like I want Goku.
ANDROID 17: That sounds a little gay, dude.
ANDROID 16: It is a little gay, dude.(The Androids fly away.)
"Can androids even be gay? Or straight?" Levy wondered.
"I'd rather not think about that," Lucy shook her head.
(Cuts to Piccolo)
PICCOLO: You know who could use some character development?
"Gohan," Mira said.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Gohan.
TENSHINHAN: Gohan.
KRILLIN: Gohan.
VEGETA: Kakarot's brat.
PICCOLO: (Angry) MEEEE! (Flies away towards Kami's lookout)
(Cuts to Kami's Lookout)
PICCOLO: Kami! We have to kill some teenagers. Also, we cool now.
MR. POPO: I DID DRUGS THIS SCENE!
"That's great…" Lucy muttered
KAMI: You had me at "killing teenagers". AAAHHH!(Kami and Piccolo fuse).
PICCOLO: WHOOOOAAAA…!
"Why was that the part that had you!?" Lucy asked.
PICCOLO: I'm three guys now!
NAIL/KAMI: (In Piccolo's head): 'Sup?
KAMI: ( Piccolo flies away from the lookout) Do you think this joke will get old?
"Not at all," Mira smiled.
PICCOLO: Nah, it's not Ghost Nappa.
KAMI: Where's Goku, anyway?
(Cuts to Goku's weird dream of him with a 3D model. He stands in front of U.A. High School dressed as Izuku Midoriya).
GOKU(?): I'm gonna be the greenest Goku ever!
"What the actual fuck?" Everyone blinked, shocked.
(Vegeta appears behind him, dressed as Katsuki Bakugou).
VEGETA(!?): F*ck you, Dekurot! Kill yourself! WRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
DEKUROT: God, you're such a deep character.
"About as deep as a kiddy pool," Gajeel snarked.
VEGETAKUGOU: (Grabs Dekurot) F*CK ME!
"I'd pay to watch that," Cana said.
"Of course, you would," Lucy sighed.
(Scene changes to Goku sleeping in Roshi's house.)
GOKU: I wish I was All Might.
"Who? Sounds…what's the word?" Levy asked.
"Stupid?" Gajeel suggested.
"Yeah that!"
GOHAN: I wish my dad was All Might...
(Cuts to Piccolo talking with Kami and Nail as he walks through the deserted Ginger Town).
Everyone groaned, knowing who was going to pop up next.
PICCOLO: Look, I'm not saying it was the BEST music, but American kids grew up with it, you know?
KAMI/LEVY: That doesn't make it good; it just makes it nostalgic.
[ Smash Mouth's "All Star", whistled ominously ]
PICCOLO: Wait… what is that?
"A very stupid green bug man," Wendy growled.
(Footsteps were heard as the whistling grew louder with each approaching step).
(Piccolo looks to his right and sees a giant green cockroach man dragging a body along with him.)
PICCOLO: Who-
IMPERFECT CELL: SOME-
[ TO BE CONTINUED ]
"Well, that was somehow more ominous than before-" Lucy was cut off by something that would haunt her for the rest of her dreams.
NAPP-ALL MIGHT: …And remember: When you say, "Plus Ultra", you really gotta say it like a Japanese dude. (The camera zoomed in on Nappa's eye) PURUSU… URUTORAAA!
"PURUSU URUTORAAA!" Natsu and Happy copied Nappa.
NAPP-ALL MIGHT: Got it? Good. Cause 'I gotta go bang Dekurot's mom. Straight up Professor Oak-in' that bitch.
Lucy was currently banging her head across the table as Natsu and Happy were still screaming.
"PLEASE JUST START THE NEXT ONE!" Lucy begged Mira.
"Yes yes, I know," Mira quickly started up the next part.
PERFECT CELL: Give money: Receive Dragon Ball.
(Cuts to Piccolo and Cell standing in Ginger Town).
IMPERFECT CELL: (Still singing) Only shooting stars break the mo~old. Hey, da~addy!
PICCOLO: Who're you?
(Imperfect Cell vomits a baby).
"IT'S STILL ALIVE!?"
"WHY IS THIS WORSE THAN BEFORE!?"
IMPERFECT CELL: You're gonna help me raise this child!
"NO! HE'S NOT READY FOR THAT TYPE OF COMMITMENT!" Mira shouted.
"WHY ARE YOU GOING ALONG WITH IT!?" Lucy and Lisanna yelled.
PICCOLO: I'm not ready for that level of commitment!
IMPERFECT CELL: Fine!(He stabs his tail into the baby and absorbs it).
"WHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!?"
PICCOLO: NOOO! MY BABY!
"YOUR BABY!" Mira cried with Piccolo.
KAMI: He's getting in your head!(Cuts to Imperfect Cell holding Piccolo) AND YOUR ARM! (Injects his tail into Piccolo's arm).
PICCOLO: AAAAGH, MY ARM!
IMPERFECT CELL: Ooh, Daddy; it's so tight!
PICCOLO: Why do you keep calling me that!?
"Because it's true! You're one of its nine fathers!" Mira cried.
"WHY ARE YOU CRYING!?"
IMPERFECT CELL: Because I'm NINE guys! Burgers and fries!
(Cuts to Krillin and Trunks who've arrived to help).
KRILLIN: Piccolo, we're here to help-(Cuts to Imperfect Cell's crotch) Oh my god; is his mouth his dick?
"Why was that the first thing you wanted to know!?" Lucy cried out.
"It's also its ass!" Cana added.
"NOT HELPING!"
IMPERFECT CELL: (His crotch grows a mouth) SOLAR FLARE!
(Image of a Freeza sex toy)
"AAAAAGGGHHHH!" Everyone screamed, traumatized by the image.
KRILLIN: AH! DICK IN MY EYES!
IMPERFECT CELL: (Flying away) BRB; Gonna eat up my siblings!
(Cuts to a plane carrying the Z-Fighters)
PICCOLO: What should we do?
FUTURE TRUNKS: If only Goku were here!
(Goku pops in with Instant Transmission)
GOKU: PLUS ULTRA! (He takes Gohan and leaves)
Natsu pouted in his seat. "Goku said it wrong."
KRILLIN: Wonder where they're going?
(Cuts to the Hyperbolic Time Chamber's entrance).
MR. POPO: WELCOME TO THE ROOM OF INFINITE BULLSHIT!
VEGETA: F*ck's that mean?
"Means you're going to get stronger in one day's time!" Levy exclaimed.
GOKU: It means next year will be tomorrow.
VEGETA: NANI!? (Mr. Popo shuts the door on him).
GOHAN: So what are we gonna do?
"Not get involved until Vegeta screws up," Gray answered.
GOKU: I dunno. I usually don't get involved until things are at their worst.
GOHAN: So, we're waiting for Vegeta?
GOKU: Waiting for Vegeta, yes.
"Goku's infinite insight on all of his friends!" Levy exclaims.
"It doesn't take much to figure out Vegeta if we're being honest," Gajeel said.
(Cuts to Master Roshi's house with a talk show in the background).
TALK SHOW: No, I don't think it's racist to call the king a son of a bitch.
(Piccolo walks up to the open window).
ANDROID 17: Hey!
PICCOLO: HRMN!?
(Screen pans out to show all three Androids).
ANDROID 17: Can Goku come out and die?
"I thought it was 'play'?" Romeo questions.
"For them it means something else entirely," His dad said.
PICCOLO: THE SIGN SAYS NO SOLICITORS! (He sends a devastating punch into 17's face).
ANDROID 17: GUAWG! (17 punches Piccolo in the gut)
PICCOLO: BLAHEGH! (Punches 17 in his gut).
ANDROID 17: GUACK! (Punches Piccolo back).
PICCOLO: BLARARAH! (Punches 17 back).
ANDROID 17: UGHAW! (Hits Piccolo back).
PICCOLO: BLUAGH!
"Doesn't get any less stupid the 2nd time," Cana said.
"MANYLY!" Elfman rips off his shirt.
(Cuts over to Android 18. The grunting continues off screen.)
ANDROID 18: And suddenly we're in Looney Toons.
ANDROID 16: I like the Road Runner.
(Cuts over to Imperfect Cell standing on a cliff).
IMPERFECT CELL: And I like Pepe le Pew!
PICCOLO: I'm a fan of Sam Sheepdog-(Imperfect Cell breaks his neck) DOLWARGH!
Mira winced. "That doesn't get any better the 2nd time."
ANDROID 17: Cyborg Jesus, what is that thing?
IMPERFECT CELL: I'm your Onii-Chan! (Slams 17 into the ground with a "Pomf").
"That's never a good sign," Happy whimpers.
ANDROID 17: What are we going to do on the ground, Onii-chan?
(Cell's tail opens up with the "WOW!" sound effect).
Lucy's head perked up after hearing that sound. "Why does that sound familiar?"
"What do you mean, Lucy?" Erza asked.
"I don't know. Just feels as if I should know that sound effect," Lucy said.
(Cuts to Android 16 with his rocket fist ready).
ANDROID 16: Gundam sound effect! (He launches his rocket fist at Cell's face).
IMPERFECT CELL: AH! (Gets punched in the face) F*ck! Do you MIND!? I don't come to your work and knock your brother out of YOUR HOLE.
"Please please please! Rephrase that!" Lucy begged.
ANDROID 17: Wait you can't do this, we're related!
IMPERFECT CELL: Not by blood~
ANDROID 17: Oh, cool. That's fine then. (Gets absorbed by Cell).
"DON'T JUST ACCEPT IT LIKE THAT!"
[ Porn music in the background accompanied by scrunching sounds ]
[Morph sounds]
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: And now, I-
TENSHINHAN: HEY, DICK LIPS! (Cell looks up to see Tenshinhan in the air) This is the last cool thing I'll ever do. There is no joke.
"There really isn't a joke this time," Levy said sadly.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Respecc. (Proceeds to get blessed by the KIKOHO) AW BEANS!
TENSHINHAN: HO-HO-HO (Ten falls to the ground after finishing his attack. His fall is accompanied by the announcer voice from Dragon Ball Fighterz). Merry Christmas motherf*cker.
"Eh, a couple days late," Lisanna shrugs.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: And Happy Hanukkah to you. (Cell prepares to kill Tenshinhan).
TENSHINHAN: Thanks.
(Goku pops in).
GOKU: Did someone say Christmas!?
"The one-time Christmas works in their favor," Erza said.
TENSHINHAN: NOW you show up.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Oh, hey Goku-
GOKU: (Holding Piccolo's unconscious body) You're gonna f*cking die. (Pops away)
Everyone was flabbergasted by Goku's cursing.
"H-Has he ever said that word before?" Carla stuttered.
"No…no he has not," Erza answered.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Oh. Guess I'll just Perfect, then.
(A wild Vegeta appears).
VEGETA: Or maybe you will not!
"He will, because you let him," Lily said.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Oh, hey Vegeta.
VEGETA: I'm gonna do you a f*ck!
"Well, that's new," Gajeel whistled. "Definitely taking that one."
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: S'cuse me?
VEGETA: NEVER! (Kicks Cell in the back of the head).
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: AHH! BLgggghhh! (Skids across the ground).
VEGETA: Look how yoke'd I am. (Spits) Straight up cock diesel!
"He is pretty big," Cana shrugs.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Can I just absorb the androids?
VEGETA: No.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Yes!
"Wait for it," Levy held up a finger.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: Pleeease?
VEGETA: Yes!
"Yup, there it is," She lowered her finger.
FUTURE TRUNKS: NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(Cuts over to Android 18 and 16 as Trunks continues to scream).
ANDROID 18: …What are they talking about? (She gets absorbed by Cell)
"WE'RE JUST SKIPPING KRILLIN'S PART!? JUVIA DOES NOT APPROVE!" Juvia rages with cold fury.
[Morph sound]
PERFECT CELL: I am perfect…and you will quote…everything I say.
"...It's not wrong," Levt sighed.
KRILLIN: YOU ATE MY GIRLFRIEND-(Gets bitch slapped by Cell) Ah!
VEGETA: Now you shall feel the wrath of SUPER VEGETA-(Gets bitch slapped by Cell) Ah!
FUTURE TRUNKS: I WON'T LET YOU DESTROY ANOTHER FUTURE-(Gets bitch slapped by Cell) Ah!
Everyone laughed at the super cut down version of Cell beating the three Z-Fighters.
"Minerva would've loved the Vegeta part," Erza wiped a tear.
PERFECT CELL: And now I'm gonna go throw a tournament. Later, breeders. (Cell leaves).
(Cuts to Krillin holding the damaged Android 16).
KRILLIN: We're friends now.
"I want to be 16's friend!" Wendy yelled.
ANDROID 16: But I want to kill Goku.
KRILLIN: Most of my friends did.
"That should be brought up a lot more. Really concerning," Erza said.
Juvia and Gajeel both coughed.
(Cuts to Perfect Cell putting his arena together.)
PERFECT CELL: (Humming Megalovania) Mmm, this will age well.
(Cuts to Goku and Gohan leaving the Hyperbolic Time Chamber).
GOKU: Hey, guys, we're out of the chamber! Anything happen? (They see that the entire lookout is on fire.)
"Vegeta had a temper tantrum," Gajeel assumed.
"Or Popo did drugs again," Lisanna suggested.
"Could've been both," Erza concluded.
GOKU: Vegeta, whatchu, do?
VEGETA: Nothin'.
GOKU: Vegeta, what did you do?
VEGETA: Nothinguh!
"Goku sounds like a parent and that's weird," Gray scrunched his face.
"It's weirder that he's doing it to Vegeta," Gajeel said.
GOKU: What. Did. You. Do?
VEGETA: I f*cked your mom!"
GOKU: I don't have a mom!
VEGETA: (Sheds a tear) Neither do I…
"Aw…" Everyone felt bad for the Prince.
GOHAN: (Walks over to Piccolo) Hey Mr. Piccolo! I'm a Super Saiyan.
PICCOLO: NO, YOU'RE ME! (Uses the Clothes Beam to change Gohan's outfit).
[ A$AP Rocky - Fashion Killa plays in the background ]
GOHAN: (Now wearing Piccolo's clothes) Cash.
"My handsome little boy," Mira sighed, happily.
FUTURE TRUNKS: By the way, we don't have Dragon Balls anymore so-
GOKU: But then what are we in!? (Pops away).
"Ah, meta joke," Levy nodded her head.
GOKU: (Pops back in with Dende) Goku fix.
DENDE: Okay, so I'm God now.
"A lot more accepting of it than before. But yeah, that's fine," Lucy said.
MR. POPO: Bet.
DENDE: Sick.
GOKU: Tournament time!
(Cuts to the Cell Games Arena)
ALUCARD: Hey, we're still doing those versus videos?
"Nope! You missed your chance!" Natsu yelled.
PERFECT CELL: Nope!
ALUCARD: Ah, no worries. (Teleports away).
"That was weird," Happy said.
"You're telling me, buddy," Natsu agreed.
GOKU: I like that guy's coat.
"It was a pretty cool coat," Natsu agreed.
PERFECT CELL: Welcome to the Cell Games, everybody. Here are the brackets. (Shows a bracket that only had Goku and Cell on it. There was also a sponsorship by HETAP logo slapped on).
"Wait, how is that a tournament?" Erza asked.
"And still with the damn sponsorship," Levy huffed.
"That part isn't important, Levy," Lily said.
"It's important to me," She replied.
FUTURE TRUNKS: Wait, how is that a tournament?
PERFECT CELL: Hey don't hate the Cell player, hate the Cell Games.
"Oh, I do. With a passion," Wendy said.
MR. SATAN: What about-
GOKU & PERFECT CELL: Shut the f*ck up!
"That's twice now that Goku's dropped an F-bomb!" Lisanna gasped.
"Manly F-bombs!" Elfman exclaimed.
MR. SATAN: They didn't really change my character anyway.
GOKU: All right! Let's go Cell!
PERFECT CELL: With pleasure!
"Yeah! Kick Cell's ass, Goku!" Natsu cheered.
Gray turned to Lucy. "He does remember how this goes, right?"
Lucy just gave him a shrug, she honestly wasn't sure.
(Cell charged in and punched Goku in the face).
GOKU: AUGH! OW! I quit! Gohan, get 'em!
"Yeah! Kick Cell's ass, Gohan!" Natsu cheered.
"Okay, now I'm really confused on if he remembers," Gray said.
GOHAN: What!?
PERFECT CELL: NANI!?
GOKU: In a year.
[ TO BE CONTINUED ]
"NANI!?" Everyone shouted.
GOHAN: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Gohan destroys the words on the screen and transforms into a Super Duper Saiyan).
"Oh thank goodness," Levy sighed in relief.
PERFECT CELL: Wait, did we just skip my children? (Gohan bitch slaps him out of his Perfect form and into his Semi-Perfect form).
"Your children suck!" Natsu yelled.
GOHAN: Get lost, ya dingus.
SEMI-PERFECT CELL: I'm no dingus…YOU'RE A DINGUS!
[ will. - Big and Chunky plays in the background ]
(Cell bloats up like a balloon).
GOHAN: Oh god, I killed us all!
"No! You didn't, Gohan!" Mira yelled.
GOKU: (Pops in) No, Gohan. Just me. (Pops away with Cell).
"HOW IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER!?" Mira roared.
GOHAN: NOOOOO-
PERFECT-ER CELL: JK, not dead, LOL.
FUTURE TRUNKS: NOOOOO-(Gets shot through the chest) AUGH!
Everyone winced. "Definitely not easier the second time."
PERFECT-ER CELL: No! Enough of that!
"They have been screaming 'No' a lot," Levy noticed.
PERFECT-ER CELL: Now listen up. Y'all been skipping my best shit since I got here. Ranked me as the fourth-best villain under King Piccolo! I'm Perfect Cell, motherf*ckers! So Dende on f*cking Earth! You better recognize the crackle of my RAW, SSSSEXUAL ENERGY, and line your 1990s asses up so I can-
GOHAN: HAAAAA! (Starts killing Cell with a Kamehameha).
"KICK ASS, GOHAN!"
PERFECT-ER CELL: This time I'ma let it all come out. This time I'ma stand up and shout. I'ma do things my way. It's my way! My way or the hig waaaay~ CHIIIP (Cell sings as he's wiped away from existence).
"Hm, that's a completely different song. But it still works," Levy giggles.
GOHAN: (Turns back to normal and fall to the ground)
KRILLIN: Gohan beat Cell!
PICCOLO: But at what cost?
(Cuts to Kami's lookout, where Dende summoned Shenron).
"Absolutely no cost at all," Levy said.
"Well, besides Goku," Lucy added.
PICCOLO: Oh right, no cost. Hooray!
SHENRON: New balls, who dis?
YAMCHA: Bring back the deads!
SHENRON: Done!
KRILLIN: Give me a girlfriend!
SHENRON: Done!
"WAIT THAT WORKED!?" Macao and Wakaba screamed.
GOKU: I'm gonna stay dead.
SHENRON: Done!
GOHAN: What!?
"What we were all thinking the first time," Erza said.
GOKU: (Fades away into the sky) You're Goku now…
"Give it a second," Levy held up a finger.
GOKU: (Fades back into frame) I-I meant FOR now.
"Yup, and there it is," She lowered her finger.
[KAI OPENING SEQUENCE]
(The Dragon Balls left to be spread across the Earth once more).
GOHAN: Wow! I wonder what's next for me?
"Oh, I'm sure you're going to have so many great adventures, Gohan!" Mira giggled.
PICCOLO: (Puts a hand on Gohan's head) You peaked.
Mira's entire face drops instantly.
GOHAN: What?
PICCOLO: You peaked.
"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS!?" Everyone shouted in unison.
GOHAN: You're kidding! After all that!?
"Guess, Goku wasn't kidding at all…" Levy winced.
PICCOLO: Yeah, sorry.
GOHAN: But…b-but I get stronger though, right?
PICCOLO: Yeah, but…no.
"Wow…I mean…that's just sad," Gajeel said.
"Eh? I'm sure Gohan will be fine," Mira shrugged, getting over it. As long as Gohan was happy in the future she wouldn't mind.
GOHAN: …Oh.
(Everyone stands around in awkward silence. Metallic footsteps could be heard in the background. Android 16 walks into frame).
ANDROID 16: By the way, I never died in this version.
Wendy jumped out of her seat. "THIS VERSION IS CANON! AND NONE OF YOU CAN TELL ME OTHERWISE!" She screamed.
Mira got out of her seat to pick up the Lacrama now that they've finally seen everything. "You know, I have been wondering something," She said aloud.
"Hm? What, Mira?" Makarov asked.
"Who sent us this Lacrama?" Mira asked. Everyone took the time to pause and wonder the exact same thing. Who exactly sent them that Lacrama?
On top of the 2nd level of the Fairy Tail sat two familiar people. One was a small girl with blonde hair, wearing a white dress. The other was a young man with black hair and black and white robes.
"Should we tell them?" Zeref asked.
"Nah, let them keep wondering," Mavis giggled.
Extra Over
NOTE: Yup, that's the end.
The Shortz will be done in a completely different side story. Until then...
Happy New Year's!