Note from Author:

Hi everyone!

I apologise for the huge break, it's been a bit hectic lately and I struggled with finding time for this one. Should be all sorted now though and it's a bit of a filler but it needed doing so here you go! You'll be happy to note, you won't need to wait so long for the next chapter :)

As always, please leave comments and interact as much as possible, I cannot STRESS how much they spur me to continue, and your feedback always warms my heart.

Stay safe fae family and HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!

- Ty x

Chapter 14:

~ Brianna ~

It had been days since their kiss and Brianna had worked hard to avoid the faerie as much as humanly possible. Late and extra shifts, playing cards with the crew…she wanted to talk to Mor, but she felt uncomfortable, because she'd realised that Mor was right, they really shouldn't take their attraction any further. But Brianna's cursed mind would play over the feeling of those lips on her own, of how Mor's breath hitched when she'd nipped at her neck.

So she'd proceeded to work herself to the bone. She'd been sat on a stool in that spot for hours going over and over her conversation with Mor, which had left a sour taste in her mouth…

One day prior…

"Fiorello hates me" Brianna muttered, rubbing her back as she tugged off her boots. She'd been dispatched all over the ship, climbing the rigs to tie off knots, be a look out, delivering equipment, messages, mopping the deck, loading and unloading barrels, and recounting the kitchens stock. She was exhausted and yet, her tired eyes searched the small cabin for Mor. The orange and yellow from the rising sun crept in through the small window, casting a warm glow throughout the small space.

She spotted the faerie on the bottom bunk, laying on her side and facing the wooden slats making up the wall, her breath rose and fell in quiet slumber. Her loose golden hair lay behind her and cascaded down her back, curling slightly at the ends, she'd always liked the length and shook her head as she envisioned her hands tangled in it.

She smiled despite her tiredness and froze as she heard Mor murmur in her sleep before loosening her limbs.

Brianna perched on the cot beside the faerie. She reached out and gently freed some of Mor's golden hair. Without thinking, she began rubbing small circles against her exposed shoulder and upper back; soft, contended murmurs greeted Brianna's ears and her stomach flipped.

"Stars, you're beautiful" Brianna whispered and pulled her hand away. Shaking her head, she changed her clothes and climbed to the top bunk, before drifting into an easy deep sleep - images of the softly slumbering faerie sleeping soundly mere inches from her head circling her mind.

~ Morrigan ~

Morrigan hadn't meant to fall into such a deep sleep, but as it became apparent that Brianna was not in any immediate danger, she'd retired to their cabin to rest with every intention of going back out to watch over the female. Yet, she'd felt compelled into a deep slumber where her strange dreams pulled her deeper.

She'd heard Brianna enter the room and scuffle around before feeling her perch on the cot. She trained her breathing, despite her hearts desire to race. She felt warmth spread throughout her body as a gentle hand tentatively shifted her hair and then her toes curled as delicate, female fingers began rubbing lazy circles at her back.

Morrigan's slow, fae hums of satisfaction escaped her mouth and she had to concentrate to stop from turning to face Brianna because she'd been afraid they'd not do much talking…

If Mor listened to her powers, which pushed and scratched at the corners of her mind and heart with the truth of her inaction; that it was due to how she enjoyed the absentminded, intimate touches from Brianna, and relished in how they made her feel. And that ball of fear - which alerted her to how she had started to feel towards Brianna - only, grew.

"Stars, you're beautiful" Brianna had breathed into the room. A stolen, forgotten and painfully honest admission, that Morrigan shouldn't have heard. But oh she had. She'd heard the reluctant honesty in Brianna's tone and knew that the words held a note of sadness within them. Morrigan squeezed her eyes tighter. Brianna rose and left, gently lowering herself onto the cot above, Morrigan immediatly felt the absence of her slender hands on her body.

As the minutes passed in solemn silence, Morrigan grew impatient. She needed to do something. She had to get herself – and her body - in control, she wanted nothing more than to answer the desperate desire to crawl to Brianna, tilt the females head back with her fngers under her delicate chin and to close all the space between them. Explore every inch of her body, with her hands and mouth…

Morrigan swallowed the lump in her throat and ignored the growing dampness between her legs. She paused as she thought about their passionate kiss, briefly touching her lips and inadvertently smiling against them before shaking her head.

"You're not planning on running away from me are you?" Morrigan spun around and a corner of her mouth twitched upward as Brianna sat cross-legged on her bed, with the sheets firmly pulled up to her chin.

"I don't know if I'd get too far being surrounded by water" Brianna chuckled.

"I don't think for one moment that you are trapped by the sea, Mor" she said it with laughter in her eyes, and a dimple appeared. Mor's heart seemed to dive at the sight.

"I'm not going anywhere," she whispered, meeting Brianna's warm eyes and cleared her throat, ignoring the way her heart melted as the gold from the sun ignited the red and orange tones in Brianna's hair. A crown of Fire. Beautiful.

Brianna hopped down and tentatively stepped in her space, far enough to be respectable but close enough that Morrigan could visibly see the flecks of amber and gold in her eyes, the colours looked startling against the green. They reminded Morrigan of the gorgeous colour-changing rivers in the Summer Court.

She was momentarily mesmerised as Brianna stepped closer, her exploring eyes drinking Morrigan's body. The female wore nothing but a plain off-white, long loose shirt. The small swell of her breasts rising with every shallow breath.

"Brianna…" Morrigan breathed, a warning. But her body hummed with need, her powers curled within her, desperate to release. The female shook her head, and placed a chilly, slightly shaking finger over Morrigan's lips. Was she cold, or nervous? A shivering sensation cascaded down Mor's back at the feel of her finger against her lips.

Those green eyes dripped with desire; her lips pursed and as she stepped closer, she took a long intake of breath through her nose. Her eyes drooped closed and she so slightly and delicately leant into Morrigan, and a delighted hum escape her lips. When her eyes opened again, her pupils were dilated and Morrigan could saw Brianna's pulse beating rapidly in her neck. She sucked in her bottom lip and sighed before stepping back.

"We need to talk" Morrigan said, breaking the trance and the primal fae – a creature living within herself rarely reared its head and it screamed in frustration. She so desperately wanted to close the distance and have Brianna in all ways; she wanted to taste her skin, her centre, she craved her.

It utterly terrified her. The primal need, the desperate way her heart leapt in hope. How she fought to keep her eyes from showing just how much she burned for Brianna. It made no sense to her, sure she'd had lovers, male and female – mostly the latter – and she'd never felt that unyielding pull. It had been a while she supposed.

"I know" Brianna whispered, not stepping out of Morrigan's space. She noticed the females gaze continued to drop to Morrigan's mouth, and she swallowed softly, her throat bobbing.

"We can't cross that line Brianna," Morrigan hated the taste of the words, but she needed to be clear with the female, no matter how frustrated they both felt. There was a time to handle those urges when they returned to their very separate lives. Morrigan simply hated complications, and if she were to be honest with herself, her heart was still mending from the human queen who'd shattered it. Not to mention the war had not long ended and it felt as though it was still ongoing, looming close again.

She'd almost lost her family, her friends. She hated war. Hated the senseless loss of life, the stench of death on the battlefield. The worry in her stomach making her feel sick, unable to keep any food or water down. She couldn't bear to have another one so soon after, her family, her home, was still healing. She was still healing.

Brianna was key to avoiding more senseless bloodshed. Of risking her home and family, her court.

The look of Feyre's eyes as she watched her mate die was heart-wrenching and she could bare it, she couldn't fathom that kind of pain. For all she most certainly loved the human queen, she had suffered enough heartbreak in that awful wall and the realisation that her love was older and…and gone.

Her heart was not ready for that again. So she answered her needs with dancing with strangers in bars, and taking them home…

Her heart was not ready to allow even the slightest bit of the possibility of those emotions that were trying so hard to latch onto Brianna, to come to fruition. Because she knew how that particular story would end, and she didn't want to play the secretly broken-hearted faerie again. She'd love to have some fun with Brianna, but the way those eyes looked at her – into her – and the way her own body reacted to a simple kiss…

It was too risky. Brianna was light and darkness, and funny, sweet, fierce and completely off limits.

"I think that line may have been crossed and if I am honest, I'd like to cross it some more, toss it aside…" A knowing smile curved on Brianna's lips as she gently ran a finger down Morrigan's bare arm. Morrigan's eyes fluttered shut and she stepped back, hating the hand dropping away and the hurt and confusion in Brianna's eyes.

"We can't" she repeated, conviction and more than a little regret in her tone.

"I see" Brianna said, she folded her arms across her chest and nodded before quickly pulling on her clothes.

"Brianna, we have to remain vigilant, the unrest grows and we…" Brianna scoffed and turned to face Morrigan, the heat in her face no longer seemed to be from embarrassment. Morrigan rubbed the back of her neck in anticipation of the ferocity she'd seen and lay dormant within the female. Like a large cat sleeping.

"Do you know what?" Brianna said, as she fastened her weapons to her body – which did nothing for dampening the attraction Morrigan felt towards her. Brianna pulled her longcoat over her shoulders and headed toward the door, she didn't turn as she whispered, so low Mor strained to hear, "you deserve happiness too Mor, however brief. Whether that's with me or not. What's the point of stopping wars, and unrest, if you are afraid to live" Morrigan stood dumbfounded as a wave of sadness and frustration washed over her.

The parting words had cut her deep, leading right to her heart. She felt tears stinging her eyes and blew out a shaking breath as a small, tender voice whispered to her.

She is right. You are afraid to live, of feeling, of loving. Of living your truth. Azriel's warm smile invaded her mind.

Coward.

She is right. She is right.

~ Brianna ~

Present Day

"Land!" her young crew-mate shouted across from her, it wasn't always practical to have two members of the crew as look-out, but on occasion the young lad had joined her. He already had a lot of promise as a sailor when he grew bigger. He'd taken to following her almost immediately, and she didn't begrudge the company of the lad.

"Well spotted lad" she said before signalling to the crew on deck, she was secretly pleased they'd reached the smaller island to restock as she could sense the seas changing. A storm was brewing and she really didn't have the energy to sail in a storm. Again.

"Should we go down and help?" he said eagerly, hazel eyes shining. Brianna shook her head and leant against the mast.

"No, they'll need us up here for a bit longer" she said before taking a flask from her hip and knocking the burning liquid down her throat.

"How long to the island?" he said, glancing between the ship and the tiny bit of land miles and miles away, his blue-grey eyes sparking.

"We'll be docking in the very early hours of tomorrow, I'd guess" she answered nonchalantly. It was already darkening, and the circular moon was poking through the grey clouds as the sun made it's retreat.

"Are you still mad at your bunkmate?" he asked, curiosity in his eyes.

"No," she said truthfully, and sighed through her nose; "I'm a little disappointed at myself mostly" she admitted and began tugging a stray thread from her coat.

"Why?" he asked, he always asked 'why'. He was extremely intuitive and curious, she'd warned him it was a good trait in a sailor but to be mindful of it.

To answer the boys question, she supposed she felt embarrassed at practically throwing herself at Mor, and feeling certain it was reciprocated, only to be turned away whilst half naked. It wasn't her finest moment and her pride had been hurt for certain, but it had hurt parts of her she didn't care to, nor have the energy, to unpick.

She accepted what Mor had said, and the subsequent attempts to further explain herself but they'd only made her feel more insecure and irate. She wasn't everyone's cup of tea – something her father loved saying whilst patting her head – but she was just so sure Mor felt something.

Something more. And she hated how she'd finally had the courage to try with someone, for however brief their encounter might have been, because she saw something she wanted and went for it for once. And she had been turned away for all her troubles.

As Brianna analysed her emotions painstakingly over the last few days, whilst avoiding the faerie; she did feel something for her and it was growing irritatingly obvious to her that her attraction wasn't wholly about letting off some steam with Mor's gloriously beautiful body. Once this small factor was realised, she'd taken the extra shifts and did everything she could not to be alone and awake too often with her 'bunkmate'.

She could sense it was hurting her, but she didn't want to face it all. She was frustrated with Mor, one minute she was flirting and kissing her with a passion she'd never felt, that made her toes curl and the next she was pushing her away citing 'the mission' as the reason for her cold shove. She was being dishonest with both herself and with Brianna and she hated it.

Keeping the ship safely moving provided enough distraction to keep her mind busy; so she'd delved into it, and the crew had taken easily to their new crewmate, trusting her with her tasks without so much as a second glance. It was nice to finally show a whole crew the skills she'd honed over the years of solo sailing, and learning more from members of Eleanor's crew than she'd ever care to admit.

"I think it's weird how she doesn't fancy you," the boy said bashfully, his plump cheeks growing pink "everyone thinks you're really nice, Papa says so all the time" he smiled shyly and she ruffled his curly brown hair.

"Thanks kid" she grinned, "they're a good crew, and your Papa has been really kind to me" she admitted. He beamed.

Most of them were older by at least twenty years, but they often commented how their son, or nephew or some other male relation, was alone and desperate for a wife to tame and make him into a man and how she'd be perfect for him.

She'd kindly laughed their comments off as she scoffed her food and said 'ah but will they be able to tame me?', a comment to which they'd grumbled rolled their eyes. Because they knew those men probably couldn't do so. The husband and kids life had never appealed to her, and she knew deep in her heart that it never would. So that was that and they'd dropped it.

"I mean I have a bit of a temper, my father used to say, 'you have fire in your heart as bright as that hair of yours girl, and it will either make or kill you' he was a bit dramatic" she laughed, the boy placed his hand on her shoulder and smiled. It seemed sad somehow.

"Brianna!" a gruff voice boomed, ruining the moment.

"Aye?" she shouted back, not bothering to look below at whom shouted for her. She simply knew the irritating voice anyway.

"The Captain wants to see you and your companion in her rooms for supper, you best head off to get changed" she rolled her eyes.

"Tell her thanks for the gracious offer, Fiorello but we'd rather jump ship and take our chances with the creatures of the depths" the boy's shocked pale face made her giggle.

"It's not a request!"

"Fiorello, I am not…"

"Now!" he said, immovable then.

"Fucker. Don't repeat that word," she added sheepishly and her young charge nodded enthusiastically.

As she got to her room she stood outside for a few minutes before opening and gently closing the door; the chill in the air sent a chill down her neck and she hugged her coat closer, grateful for its warmth. Mor sat with one leg across the other reading a book; Brianna wondered where in the gods she'd got that from but the question died on her lips as the faerie shot her a wide, toothy grin. The sight made Brianna's stomach flip and she nodded in greeting.

"We have been summoned to the Captains' quarters for supper" she rolled her eyes as she tugged her boots off and sighed at the blisters atop blisters. She was exhausted and sore; this supper would be painful indeed.

Mor slowly closed her book and frowned at Brie's feet.

"I have a salve for that, you should've said you were in pain" Mor's gentle tone was laced with genuine concern.

"I'm fine honestly, working on a full size ship is tough work, I forgot just how tough it could be on the old body. I'll live though" Mor frowned.

"Brianna, I am over five centuries old, I'd hardly say you were old" Brianna dropped her boot and spun around.

"Shit, now that is old" she grinned and Mor leant forward and playfully smacked her arm, "ouch," she said rubbing at the spot. "I'm almost twenty-one and yet my bones feel as old as you" Mor frowned and folded her arms over her chest in quiet protest.

"Of course, because we're all frail" Brianna scoffed, she fanned her face in mock fragility. "What with our near impenetrable skin, general ethereal beauty and inherent enhanced skill-set" Brianna laughed and winced, Mor smiled softly and pulled out a small tin and motioned for her to sit with her eyes.

"You forgot powers," Mor wiggled her eyebrows and grinned as Brianna's eyes widened, "many high fae have certain abilities" she clarified and Brianna rolled her eyes.

"See? I don't stand a chance against your superior biology" Brianna winked at the last word and unconsciously, her body had leant closer to the faerie. She swallowed.

"Yet we both bleed the same" Mor smiled and popped open the tin and gently spread some of the salve over her wounds, Brie sucked in a breath as a sharp sting settled into her wounded feet and shot up her legs. She closed her eyes as tears welled, her breathing settled as Mor took her hand and squeezed.

They met each others gaze and it was the first time in days Brianna had allowed such close proximity. Mor smiled, colour creeping up her neck as she gently shifted some hair behind her elongated ears.

"Brianna," Mor started.

"It's fine Mor, let's leave it as it is and move on?" Mor grudgingly nodded, "we'd better get changed" Brianna croaked and cleared her throat, patting Mor's hand, "thank you, that already feels better" she said sincerely.

"You're comfortable on a ship" Mor said as Brianna gripped a handrail and glanced back at the faerie.

"Thank you, I think?" Brie laughed.

"You seem confident here, like an animal being freed in its natural home" Brianna stopped and Mor almost bumped into her. She grinned as she stared into the surprised and genuine brown eyes.

"I've never really been 'entrapped', not without my permission anyway, far too stubborn for that" Heat crept up Mor's neck and cheeks, Brianna bumped her shoulder gently and they continued through the ship, behind them the moon shone on the surface of the sea. "I have always loved sailing, my father taught me a little, he used to call me a mermaid" she smiled at the fond memory, "It's a creature who was part fish, I loved those stories when I was young" she added.

"They are not so pleasant in reality" Mor said, matteroffact, her footsteps close beside her.

"In any case," she moved on, climbing a small step, and rounding a corner to reach the Captains quarters, "it feels natural for me to be on a ship, or in the water. I feel…"

"Peaceful?" Brianna nodded, "there's a large lake near my home, hidden beyond mountains and trees. It's crystal blue; the surface so clear you can see the landscape reflected with unimaginable clarity. They say it's enchanted and should you swim with your lover at twilight, when the moon is highest, it will reveal to you whether you're with your true mate". Brie stopped and faced the faeie, her face solemn and yearning.

"That sounds beautiful, Mor" Brianna smiled, she understood that feeling, of missing the wholeness you get from being 'home', or she remembered the feeling.

"It is, although I've never had cause to test its alleged magical abilities" a small frown appeared on her forehead.

"Maybe one day" and Mor nodded wistfully before glancing at the door they'd reached. An unsettling feeling gripped Brie's heart, at the idea of Mor taking her lover to that lake one day and the sad acknowledgement that that person would not be herself made her feel, quite ridiculously, hollow.

Brianna knocked on the door and a grumbled 'enter' sounded from within the room. Mor looked stunning, she wore a red dress, embroidered with golden leaves around the bust and slit up one leg, showing her gorgeously tanned, smooth skin. Her hair dangled behind her in a loose braid, with loose curled strands resting on her elegant neck and around her face, she'd finished by applying a red lip, which matched the dress exquisitely. Somehow, this feminine look had made her appear all the more powerful. She'd wondered if this was somehow more comfortable for the faerie, as though this attire was her true armour.

Brianna felt less than 'dressed' in her clean linen shirt, buttoned in a way in which to discretely show her cleavage, she'd dusted some rouge on her cheeks and applied a nude lip, with a delicately placed black line across each top eyelid, which she'd been told accentuated her green eyes.

Her shirt tucked loosely into black trousers and the braces with gold buckles were pulled over her shoulders keeping them from falling. She'd worn her long-coat for warmth, and sturdy, polished boots. Her hair had been brushed and hung free, and a gold clip at the back kept the strands from straying. When they'd emerged from changing, Mor had visibly swallowed and clenched her jaw.

Brianna felt the air leech from her lungs as she took in the beauty before her. She'd decided to accept there was attraction and it was absolutely fine to let it die at that. That didn't mean she'd punish her eyes for looking the curvaceous body up and down, nor her heart for the speed at which it beat in her chest. She was merely human after all.

"Well come in and take a seat, you're letting the heat escape" Eleanor mused.

~ Morrigan ~

Brianna looked gorgeous and Morrigan had to control her breathing with every sentence she spoke and step she took.

They'd been sitting in silence with the Captain, making small talk in the way of conversation and the situation reminded her of being forced to hold meetings with her father to discuss Court matters. Perhaps not a brutal in fairness to the Captain, who was clearly trying to build a bridge from the ashes from which, she'd burnt.

She'd gathered that the Captain was procrastinating, trying to find the right time to discuss something but this true purpose was hidden amongst pleasantries, sarcastic responses and shuffling food around ones plate. She distracted herself from the ice in the room by stealing glances at Brianna across the table, who'd batted sarcastic retort after sarcastic retort, behind it all though, Morrigan could sense her tired companions pain. She clearly felt forced into the situation, being forced to formally dine with ones first love, who betrayed you and the person whom rejected you must be difficult. So she couldn't blame the female for her blatant hostility.

But her own enjoyment at witnessing Brianna dressed beautifully and how her viper tongue managed to stop any attempt at conversation from the Captain was muted by Brianna's discomfort. Her own disdain for Eleanor at the meal had mostly been caused by the appreciative, slow glance she'd given Brianna as they'd entered. She'd had no right to feel anything like jealousy, but still, it reared in her belly like a snake, ready to bite.

That, and the human food was disgusting.

What a confusing mess it all was, she'd have to work hard to claw her self back to friendly terms with Brianna. She was used to witnessing her companions trip into romance when important mattered needed attending to, and silently judging them for straying their concentrations.

Yet, here she was, daydreaming about pulling those straps down and un-tucking the shirt to allow her hands to roam over the creamy skin…

"Mor is it?" Morrigan snapped her head to face the Captain, and nodded, swallowing some water.

"I wonder how long your errand will take once you are deposited in Hybern?" she mused, swirling her glass, the red liquid sloshing precariously at the edge.

Morrigan did not answer the question. She didn't think it was any of her business nor did she truly know the answer. The Captain nodded to herself and glanced at Brianna.

"The ship will reach our first stop early in the morning" Eleanor said, before gulping some strong scented liquor.

"Indeed, we saw the isle" Brianna said, glancing at Mor and back at her plate.

"We'll pick up some crew and then set sail for Hybern"

"I am aware of the course Eleanor, did you invite us to your den to needlessly discuss matters which we were already privy?" the Captain sighed and shook her head.

"No, of course not" she quickly glanced between them, "I wanted to ask what your plans were, after you'd completed your…errand?"

"I don't see how that has anything…"

"We will return to Prythian, and then we will each go our separate ways, with a new friend to call upon when the need arises" Morrigan said, her tone devoid of emotion. Despite her heart sinking at the thought, she didn't dare look at Brianna, but she felt the females hurt.

"I see" the Captain muttered, confusion briefly entering her features, she turned swiftly to Brianna, "you should join my crew, permanently" she said it so quickly, Morrigan had almost missed it.

Brianna laughed an emotionless, exasperated guffaw.

"I'd sooner rather join the Imperial Army of Hybern or…" she glanced at Mor, "meet a mermaid", a surprised bubble of a laugh escaped from Morrigan, the sound sweet and true, humour and understanding glinted in Brianna's green eyes.

"Think about it Brie, the crew like you enough already, you could learn more and be apart of a family, plus you'd be earning steady coin" Brianna sighed, "those things are going to be important soon…just, think about it?" Morrigan bristled at that, but she could not deny the logic. She hated how she prayed on Brianna's circumstances.

A loud bang echoed throughout the cabin, muffled panicked voices shouted and feet bounded on the wooden floor above them.

The Captain sighed, slight alarm in her eyes.

"What the?" Brianna uttered, standing. Morrigan was beside the female before she released she'd even moved.

The door to the cabin flew open and a short man stood in the doorway, gripping a sword.

"Captain, bandits I think…they're trying to board"

The Captain pulled her sword from her side and Brianna copied the motion simultaneously, Eleanor smirked.

"Let's see how well you've been training" she mumbled in Brianna's ear as she passed. Morrigan suppressed the urge to growl.

They watched as the Captain ran for the door. Brianna moved to chase after her and halted to watch Mor.

"You might not have time to change or grab a weapon, maybe you should stay here?"

Morrigan pulled her dress to reveal her blade, she kept it on her at all times, it served her in both wars and saved her life countless times. She tugged it free and smirked.

"I am a weapon" she glared at the door.