A/N: Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed so far. This one is a long one, about 48 pages and I'm in love with how it turned out so I hope all of you enjoy it too. A few notes: Gough Island is a real island in the South Atlantic that does have a weather station still in use. There are, indeed, penguins, mice and albatross there. Some details of the island have been altered or made up in order to fit my story. Without further ado, happy birthday to me, this is my gift to you!
I is for Instinct
Max's heart had stopped before. She'd been dead and if it hadn't been for her brother, for Zack, she would have stayed that way. Really, technically, her heart never started back up. This time it was Zack's heart that stopped. It's just that it was her chest that it stopped in. The world around her tunneled, it looked kind of wavy and untouchable. Like asphalt on a hot summers day. She could barely make out the moving lips of the people in front of her but their voices were just so low that her brain couldn't make sense of their words.
Suddenly awareness slammed back into her, Zack's heart started beating again, her eyes were able to focus on Mole and Dix and Mole's voice finally went back to sounding like it's usual gruff self.
"Where?" she managed to croak out, clearing her throat in an effort to stabilize herself. This wasn't the time to fall apart.
The silence lasted too long as the two transhumans shared a look.
"Didn't you hear me Max?" Mole asked, his voice shockingly patient. "We don't have a location. The electrical storm fried the black box," he repeated slowly.
She shook her head. "Where was the last known location?"
"Over the Atlantic headed back from French airspace," Dix piped up. "But during the storm they could have been knocked thousands of miles off course."
"Or…" Mole hesitated to say it. "Or they could have gone down in the Atlantic," he grumbled, clenching the cigar tightly in his jaw.
"Can you bring up any images?" Max asked, ignoring Mole and swinging her gaze to Luke who was sitting nearby at the computer terminal.
"We've been working on it," Luke grunted out as his fingers flew over the keyboard.
"Work harder," she grit out through clenched teeth, ignoring their hard looks as she turned on her heel and marched into her office. She shifted through the large stack of paperwork on her desk until she finally found the cellphone that Alec had forced her to carry once they became trapped in TC. She flipped it open and hit number 8 on her speed dial.
"Hey," Logan's kind voice greeted.
"I need your help," She stated briskly.
"Of course," he replied, a hard edge in his voice as he readied himself for whatever she was about to spring on him. They hadn't spoken much over the last few months as her duties had started to overwhelm her and his duties had demanded his attention but he would always be there for her. "What do you need?"
"Two of my people were on a private plane headed to home from Russia after meeting up with an important contact to help further our fight for freedom," she began to explain. "Somewhere over the Atlantic they hit an electrical storm. We lost all contact, all we know is that they were going down. Prior to that the last gps signal they got had them flying over French airspace."
"Black box?" he asked.
"No go. Destroyed in the storm. I have my people trying to find any video evidence of where they might have gone down but I could use as many people on this as I can get," Max replied. She could feel her emotions slipping away as she brought the soldier to the front. She needed to maintain a healthy distance from the feelings that threatened to drown her so that she could remain useful.
"You got it. Who were the transgenics on the plane?" he asked, she could hear the keyboard keys clacking in the background.
"An X5 who goes by Joon and…" her voice caught in her throat. She cleared it and pushed forward. "Alec," she finally got out.
Logan was quiet for a long moment. "I'm sorry, Max. I'll hit ya back if-" he cut himself off. "When I find something," he told her softly. He might not be best friends with the younger man but Alec had really stepped up over the last couple of years. He might not be around much but Logan knew that the whole of Terminal City liked and relied on the charismatic X5, Max included.
"Thanks," she replied right before flipping the phone closed. She let out a deep breath as she sank down into the somewhat comfortable (as a pose to most of their furniture) desk chair that Alec had surprised her with a few months earlier.
~DA~
The turbulence was jarring, Alec's head rattled as it snapped back against the headrest of his seat. The emergency lighting on the plane flashed disconcertingly. Despite the pressure in the cabin holding his head back he forced his head to the side to see if he could see anything out of the small window. If he survived this then he'd need to get his bearing as soon as possible.
The cloud cover was too heavy, they were trapped in a dark gray sky, lightening flashes contributed to the plane lights flashing and Alec noticed little white dots at the end of his vision. He forced his head in the other direction, looking at the gaping hole in the side of the plane where an emergency door had once been. Where Joon had once been.
Alec was thrown forward in his seat as the plane shifted into a nosedive. He grabbed the oxygen mask that hung down above him, struggling to place it on his face, and braced himself for impact. He breathed in and out deeply, loosening his muscles to more easily absorb the impact. Mentally he counted down, shutting his eyes, bracing himself. Three.
Two.
His world went black.
He noticed the rocking motion before anything else. His head was pounding and his mouth was cotton dry. Before he was able to pry his eyes open he accidentally inhaled a huge gulp of water. Salt water. The events of the last few minutes came flooding back to him and his eyes flew open.
He was completely beneath the water, his lungs burned as the sea water made itself at home in them, his arms pushed down in a heavy stroke and he found himself breaking the surface. He breathed in huge gulps of air as he looked around. He was completely surrounded by the wreckage of the plane. The thing that had his heart dropping into his stomach was the lack of anything in view aside from the plane and water. No land.
He swam to what looked like one of the wings of the plane floating nearby. It was large enough that he was able to pull himself up onto it completely. It dipped a little under his weight but it was buoyant enough to continue bobbing along and he closed his eyes in relief at the small mercy. Alec used his arms to row himself around to other parts of the wreckage in the hopes of scavenging anything that could help him.
After what felt like forever he managed to fashion himself a couple of makeshift paddles out of pieces of the seat. Luckily he had still had his pocket knife on him when the plane went down and he put it to use to strip the pieces he needed to fashion the small oars. They weren't much but he'd be able to use them to propel himself along faster than it would be to use his arms.
He also kept his eyes peeled for the pilot but he already knew that, like Joon, the man had died. The cockpit would have been the first to crash into the sea and that's assuming the pilot had survived the pressurized cabin and turbulence long enough to even witness impact.
They had been leaving France last he knew before they hit the electrical storm but he knew that the storm had thrown them off course. How far off course was anyone's guess. He sighed as he looked out at the wide open ocean. The only way he knew for sure that he didn't want to go was west. Land could be anywhere to the east, south or north of him though. He sighed and picked a direction.
To the best of his knowledge he had been at sea for three days. The wreckage from the plane was long behind him and he hadn't seen anything but water in a long time. He had been able to scavenge a dinky first aid kit that had been floating amongst the debris and, along with basic medical supplies, had gained a tiny compass, a multi-tool, flint, flares and an emergency blanket.
The emergency blanket was being put to use now as a storm started to set in. The previously blue skies darkened to a deep gray that reminded Alec of the day of the crash and the ocean roiled and rolled as the winds picked up. Alec took off his jacket and used it to secure himself to the wing of the plane that had become his raft before grabbing the emergency blanket and hunkering down below it, keeping a tight hold on the edge of the wing.
He had already secured the first aid kit to his belt loop with the carabiner that had been attached to it and as he laid on his stomach on the wing he gathered his makeshift oars beneath him to try and make sure they didn't get lost in the storm. It was uncomfortable but, then again, nothing the last few days had been comfortable.
Uncomfortable ended up being a woefully inaccurate descriptor for what that night ended up being. Alec was amazed that he didn't end up capsizing on his small raft, he had come close more times than he could count. The ocean waves had towered over him all through the night and never, not even during his darkest moments in Psy-Ops had he ever felt more insignificant than he had in the face of the power of nature.
The blanket did little more than provide a bit of relief from the winds but it was something that Alec clung to with every ounce of strength during the worst of it. When the skies cleared Alec finally moved his stiff muscles and sat up, bringing the blanket away from his head and squinting against the lightened skies.
He flexed his hands and groaned a bit as his stiff joints protested against the movement after clutching the sides of the plane all night. He took inventory and groaned again as he realized that he lost one of his oars during the night. He still had one oar, his knife, the first aid kit, blanket and his jacket though so the night wasn't a complete loss.
He looked at his surroundings. Still just a lot of blue. He tried not to think about the hunger gnawing at his stomach. He had been careful when removing the emergency blanket and managed to save himself a small pool of rainwater that he greedily drank. It did little to soothe his parched throat but it was something.
He had no idea how far he had drifted during the storm and he could only hope that it had brought him closer to land. He felt drained. After not getting any sleep the night before, his every thought and action focused on surviving, he decided that just a moment of rest was well deserved.
He closed his eyes and for the first time since the moments leading up to the plane crash he allowed himself to think of his friends. He thought of Joshua and wondered if he'd ever get a crushing bear hug from the big fella again. He thought of Mole and wondered where the pain in the ass lizard would get his cigars from if Alec didn't make it back. He thought of Sketchy and Original Cindy and wondered if he'd ever get a beer with them or play a game of pool.
He thought of Max. He wondered if he'd ever see her scowl at him again. If he'd ever see that hint of softness behind her eyes as she called him a smart ass. If he'd ever feel her fist against his shoulder or her palm against the back of his head that had, more recently, turned into something of a caress as her hand would fall away. He wondered if they'd ever get the chance to figure out the strange undercurrent of tension that had run through their every interaction in recent months.
A wave broke over him and he sputtered a bit as he spat the salt water back out and one thought ran rampant through his mind. Probably not.
Alec spent more and more time sleeping as the days passed by. His lips were cracked and bleeding, his energy levels were nearly non existent. He was cold. It wasn't just the ocean coolness, or the near constant feeling of being soaked to the bone, it was the air. It was the frequent rains and cool temperatures during the days. He'd lost track of exactly how long he'd been lost at sea but he thought he might have been on day six.
Then he heard them. Birds. The out of place sound pierced through his muddled brain and he fought to open his eyes, they were practically glued shut, and when he did his heart jumped to his throat as he watched an albatross soar overhead. A sudden rush of adrenaline surged through him and he easily propelled himself up into a sitting position. He looked around and finally his eyes caught sight of land.
His face broke out in a grin that tore his lips back open but he didn't even feel it as he grabbed his remaining oar and ruthlessly paddled himself closer to the rocky terrain. As he gained on the island he saw...penguins. Fuckin' penguins. He thought back to everything he'd ever learned about birds and, as he got closer, he was able to identify them as northern rockhopper penguins. He was much further south than he'd thought.
He pushed the information to the back of his mind for now as he made it close enough to the island that he gathered up his meager belongings and jumped into the shallow water to walk the rest of the way in. The wing of the plane, his home for the last week or so, would only get caught on the rocks that jutted out from the land.
Once he was on solid ground he collapsed in a heap. He may have actually kissed the ground but he'd never admit to it. The light was starting to dim and Alec picked himself up, stumbling a bit as his legs worked to get used to walking again. His knees were shaky but he pushed forward, tucking the blanket beneath his arm and double checking to ensure that the first aid kit was secure on his belt loop as he tied his jacket around his waist.
He walked away from the beach, keeping a sharp eye on his surroundings as he moved as quickly as his starving, tired, weather beaten body would allow. After what he figured was about six clicks he entered a plateau. He turned in a slow circle and decided to head back into the hills to look for fresh water. He finally heard some water running and practically ran toward it.
He entered a small clearing and his breath was stolen as he laid eyes on a small waterfall that opened up into a deep blue pool of water. He gave it about two seconds thought before he dropped to his knees at the waters edge and, forming a scoop with his hands, brought large mouthfuls of gloriously fresh salt free water to his mouth.
He submerged his head next and his lips turned up in a smile under the water at the piece of good that he'd finally stumbled upon. When he brought himself back up he laughed. His body still craved food but the water had done wonders to restore his energy levels and bring some positivity to the forefront of his mind.
~DA~
A week. A whole entire full seven days. One hundred and sixty eight hours. Ten thousand and eighty minutes. Seven days and zero answers. Zero leads. Max had zero patience. Luke and Dix had been in near constant contact with Logan as they tried to narrow down the search area. Business on a city level had to go on as usual and Max was doing everything in her power to keep everything afloat.
She was realizing exactly how much Alec did. How much people relied on him. How much she relied on him. Time kept ticking on and Terminal City survived. Mole picked up some of Alec's duties and Priya, someone who Alec had trusted implicitly since their Manticore days, had taken over his training of the X6 and X8's. She had also taken over some of the meetings with Alec's contacts, the ones that had met her when Alec brought her to previous meeting. It wasn't as beneficial as having Alec around but, for now anyway, it was enough.
Max took over the rest of it. Between that and her relentless search for Alec it was a damn good thing she rarely had to sleep.
~DA~
Alec settled up in a tree close to his newfound water source. With no knowledge of animal life or possible inhabitants of the island he found himself on and no daylight left to scout he didn't want to bunk down on the ground. He once again used his jacket to secure himself in place, this time to the tree, and settled back.
He reflected on the drastic change between how and where he woke up this morning and where he was going to sleep tonight. He thought of penguins. They had been on course for the US, headed over the Atlantic shortly after flying over France when they hit the storm and now he was sharing an island with fucking penguins. He figured he was somewhere in the South Atlantic. Hopefully not further south than that.
He wondered if Max was looking for him or if they assumed he died in the crash. He wondered if they even had any idea where the plane went down. Even if they did know where it crashed he had absolutely no clue how far he had drifted between then and now. The storm and his declining physical state following the storm had wreaked havoc on his sense of direction and he'd lost the tiny compass that had come in the first aid kit on his second day adrift. That's what happened when it was the size of a dime he thought derisively.
He sighed and closed his eyes before shutting his mind off so he could get some rest. The morning would bring a chance to explore, to figure out if there were other people on this rock or if he was well and truly alone. More than anything he hoped that tomorrow would bring food.
His eyes opened slowly as he woke up to the loud squawking of birds and the rustle of leaves. The events of the previous day...the previous week came flooding back to him. He groaned and straightened himself up from the slump he'd ended up in after he'd drifted off. One foot dangled down off the limb he was perched on and his body was titled sideways, he was glad he had the foresight to tie himself to the trunk.
His stiff muscles protested as he moved to untie his jacket from his waist, yelling out even more angrily as he slowly climbed back down to the ground. When he'd arrived on land yesterday the adrenaline had pumped through his body allowing him to ignore the aches and pains that came after a week of no movement aside from the tensing of every muscle in his body to try and keep himself afloat on his makeshift raft.
The fresh water had allowed him to ignore the fact that he hadn't eaten in god only knew how long. His body wasn't as forgiving in the cold light of day and Alec stumbled forward back to the pool of water. Drinking deep and trying to get his bearings. He needed food. That was priority number one.
Alec slowly stumbled back towards the shore where he'd first hit land. He was dizzy and sluggish but he pushed himself forward. He'd been worse off than this before. It felt like hours before he finally heard the waves crashing against the large rocky shore, loud now that he was close, and he stumbled out of the treeline to the sight of those fuckin' penguins.
He cocked his head in consideration. He'd never eaten penguin before. The thought of it was somewhat off putting. They were so damn cute and he could only imagine Max's reaction if she found out he'd murdered a penguin. His survival came first though and he figured they outnumbered him to the point where he was the less expendable party.
His plan to catch himself a penguin may have been more successful, however, if he wasn't moving like a sloppy drunk on his way home from last call. The flightless birds took one look at him and slipped seamlessly into the water, swimming far out of his reach.
He sighed and looked around for plan b. He could try fishing but he had a feeling his slow reaction time would once again work in favor of his prey. His musings were cut short by the flicker of movement from the corner of his eye, he turned his head slowly and grimaced at the sight of a mouse. He didn't put much thought into it though as he slowly extracted his switchblade from his pocket, twirling it until the blade was between his finger tips and then, once he'd locked eyes on his target, he threw it, hitting the mouse blade first in the head and killing it instantly.
He sighed deeply and went to retrieve his meager kill. He removed the blade and lifted the poor thing up by it's tail. It was barely a bite once skinned and cleaned but it was more food than he'd had in over a week and he eyed it hungrily as he slowly spit roasted it over the fire he'd managed to make with the flint he'd had in the first aid kit. The day was overcast but so far there hadn't been any rain so he'd made the fire right there on the beach, eager to get something in his stomach.
The small amount of meat didn't really do much for him but his stomach didn't quite feel like a gaping black hole anymore so he supposed that was worth something. He poked around the rocks for a few minutes as he kept an eye out for any more mice. What he really wanted was a nice big steak. Beggars, he supposed, couldn't be choosers though so rodent was good enough for now.
He didn't see anything after what he figured was an hour so he doused the fire and trudged back into the treeline towards the plateau and this time, since he already had a water source he focused on finding more food. His gaze darted everywhere and when his foot sank into a mound of mud he glanced down just in time to stumble forwards, just barely catching himself before he stepped on a single white egg. Hello lunch, he thought eagerly as he picked up the egg which was about four and a half inches long and looked around for any sign of the parents. He wouldn't mind a little meat to go with his eggs.
He didn't have a frying pan or a pot to boil water so he decided to just crack the thing open and hope the embryo wasn't too far developed. He gently cracked the egg against a nearby rock and, with dread, peeked at it through one eye. Relief flooded through him when he saw nothing but yolk and egg white as he carefully pulled off half of the shell, using the other half as a cup. He greedily drank down the raw egg.
It was by far one of the worst meals he'd ever had...and he grew up in Manticore. But it settled nicely in his stomach and the absence of the gnawing feeling was well worth the slimy taste on his tongue.
"How's my vacation, you ask?" he muttered to himself. "Just dandy. I had myself a lovely little meal of raw egg and mouse. Hoping to catch a nice lunch of snails and snakes," he answered himself sarcastically. It was the first time he'd really spoken in days and his throat felt like sandpaper, his voice was nearly unrecognizable.
Following his disgusting yet satisfying meal he turned right and started heading south. He came in on the east side of the island and his pool of water was located about five clicks to the north which was about a click away from his current location. He still should have hours of daylight left and he was beginning to get the impression that his plot of land would be easily explored. So far he hadn't witnessed any signs of human habitation.
He nearly stumbled to a stop when, after walking a few more clicks away from the plateau, he caught sight of a sprawling old building that was clearly uninhabited. Large portions were clearly inaccessible with severe fire damage. Parts of it's roof was caved in and there was a tree that had taken out one of the walls but it was a sign that this island had once had a human presence. Maybe it still occasionally did. Not too far away there were other smaller buildings that had likely been temporary housing for whoever had lived there, they also looked to be damaged by weather or by fire depending on the building. He slowly stalked towards the main building, careful to remain quiet and not disturb the terrain too much. He still wasn't entirely sure how many and what kind of creatures he shared this island with.
He cautiously entered the building after scouting around behind it. It was an old weather station, it looked like it hadn't been in use for decades. When America had been hit by the pulse it hadn't been the only country affected. The aftermath of that unprecedented attack had spider webbed throughout the world, the repercussions made obvious in many ways including in the suspension of funding for various projects. Other countries had to let programs go in order to save their resources for what they deemed most important. The world changed over night and things like how many inches of rain some nowhere island out in the middle of the ocean got was unimportant and left forgotten.
He looked around for any equipment he could use to try and signal back home but he found nothing usable, he wasn't even sure he could scrap anything together but he figured he'd have the time to try so he gathered anything that looked remotely technological together onto a table that was barely left standing.
He was going through cupboards and would deny feeling tears prick at his eyes as he caught sight of a few really, really old bags of pasta and some canned goods. Food. Food that wasn't rodent or raw egg. It wouldn't last forever but a small amount would serve to pad his stomach that night.
Something crinkled beneath his boot and he looked down to find a few loose papers that had obviously gotten left behind when they'd abandoned the station. He picked them up and found they were notes on some of the wildlife. The Penguins and albatross. The mice, which were noted as invasive and known to attack and kill albatross chicks. He shuffled through the papers and paused when he finally found one with the name of the island he was on. Gough Island, South Atlantic.
"Well shit," he muttered, even though he'd already kind of come to the conclusion that he was much further south than he'd hoped.
He sighed and set the papers down glancing around once more before heading back outside. The rest of the building he'd just explored was heavily damaged and inaccessible so he headed towards the housing units.
All but two of them were nothing but burnt out shells. One of the more viable ones had severe smoke damage and had nothing of any use to him. The last one though, it had a cot. So already he loved it. He found a lone skillet in one of the cupboards. A pot on the counter near a sink that had long since stopped working. There was no bathroom, his guess was that they'd had a communal one set up somewhere that had likely been destroyed. Not that it would be of any use anymore anyway.
His very favorite find though, was a fishing pole and a crab net. Rifling through cupboards that were almost bare he managed to find a thin blanket, a very old deflated pillow that was so flat it might as well be a very small sheet, a threadbare towel and a few more cans of food and three unopened bottles of water. Whoever had occupied this trailer had obviously either had too much shit or had left in a hurry. The occupant of the other trailer had certainly taken the time to take all his items home with him.
All in all as the barely there sun started to set Alec's day was ending on a much more positive note than it had began on. His trailer was set nearest the cliffs and he walked out, shrugging his jacket on to guard against the wind chill and droplets of rain that were slowly starting to leak from the sky. He stood there for a long time, watching the waves break against the rocky cliffs. Catching sight of albatross flying overhead, his enhanced vision peering into the watery depths and catching sight of the fish that would soon be his meals.
When the rain started to fall more heavily he turned back to the trailer and walked in, closing the door against the wind. He grabbed the barely there towel and used it to dry his hair and face before slowly stripping out of his clothes. The island had been damp since he'd arrived and he'd spent a week in the ocean prior to that so his water logged clothes still hadn't dried. He hung them up to dry by draping them over cupboard doors.
He wrapped the towel around his waist and grabbed one of the old cans of tomato soup, using his pocketknife to pry it open and, since he didn't want to go out and make a fire and there wasn't any electricity to heat it inside the trailer, he drank it down cold. It was the best meal he'd ever had. He followed it up with a small sip from one of the water bottles before climbing onto the cot and pulling the thin but pleasantly long blanket up to his chin. Fed, hydrated, somewhat warm- at the very least not freezing cold- and sheltered from the elements Alec fell almost immediately into a deep slumber.
~DA~
Two months after the plane crash life in Terminal City had moved on to a new normal. Their supply runs were more risky now because losing Alec had lost them a lot of his contacts which meant more burglarizing to get what they needed. They did it though, they were well trained and for the most part they were doing well.
Morale though...well, morale had taken a nosedive. Much like Alec's plane, Max thought with a mirthless snort. Nine days after the plane went down Logan, Luke and Dix had found evidence of some of the debris from the plane. It was thousands of miles off course and while a lot of it had sunk they managed to find clear enough images of what was left to positively identify it. There was nothing nearby. No land, nothing. Max's heart had sunk and she was almost positive that it now lay at the bottom of the ocean with the plane wreckage and, possibly, with Alec.
She ordered them to keep looking for any evidence of survival and she knew that they still were. It wasn't as high a priority anymore though and they all knew that the likelihood of them finding anything was incredibly low. Max knew Alec though. Knew that he'd beaten the odds before. There was a part of her deep inside that was absolutely convinced that he was still out there somewhere.
She hoped it wasn't just wishful thinking but as the weeks turned into months she found herself losing more and more hope. She felt more like 452 these days than she ever had before as she went through the emotions with none of the spark that made her Max.
Mole had always enjoyed drinking. Always consisted of the last three years since Manticore had burned down, it fit though because three years ago was when his life really began. Not that he was getting all philosophical about it because he didn't do that shit.
Mole had always enjoyed cigars. See the above spiel for what exactly made up 'always'.
Mole had never really liked people. That went for before and after his life began. He had, more recently- see 'always' times- been known to make an exception or two. He got along well enough with Dix and Luke which was good considering how much time he spent with the two computer nerds.
He liked Gem and Dalton well enough considering one was always carrying around her sticky little spit ball and the other was about as annoying as they made 'em.
He didn't really like Max all that much but he respected her. He usually found her judgment to be fairly sound and she treated him like an equal. Even made him her second in command. Max was a little bit of alright even if she was a black hole of depression these days.
He hated Alec though. Granted his version of hate is a little skewed and what he really meant was that Alec was his best friend forever or some shit like that and he was extremely upset that the man was MIA.
Yeah. He hated Alec and he loved his booze and who needed one when he had the other? A lot of the other. Homemade even. The stronger the better given their metabolism. He took another deep drink.
Sorrow came in many colors but all of them are muted. Sorrow was dark blue like the sky just before a storm rolled in. Sorrow was gray like the billowing clouds as they emptied themselves of rain. Sorrow was purple like the sky as another day ended and another cold night began. Sorrow was black like the night sky when the city lights were browned out and the stars were too afraid to shine.
Anger came in many shades and all of them are vibrant. Anger was deep red and burnt orange like the lava that spewed from an erupting volcano. Anger was dark gray, a slightly darker shade than sorrow, like the smoke cloud that billowed and mushroomed following the eruption. Anger was black like the suffocating, ash filled air when fire was close by.
Joshua was blue and gray and purple. Joshua was red and orange and black. Joshua was sorrow and Joshua was anger and Joshua missed Alec. The middle of his closest family. The cream in the oreo, Alec had said once. Joshua still didn't know what that meant but he knew it was accurate.
For weeks after Alec went missing he couldn't paint. He couldn't even look at the canvas or the colors or the tools. And then one day he picked it all back up and he didn't leave the easel for two days. Not until Max had come in to check on him even though he knew she was barely hanging on herself.
Max was dark blue and deep red and black. Max was gray and orange and purple. Max was anger and Max was sorrow and Max missed Alec. Maybe more than anyone else.
Joshua had taken a step back as Max snapped him out of his paint fueled stupor. He had eight canvases set in various spots in his apartment. All of them were various shades of blue, gray, purple, black, red and orange. There were no other colors. No happy green or cheerful pink. No earthy brown or sunny yellow.
As he had looked at them he realized they spoke of each week Alec had been gone. The eighth one, the one still on his easel, was little more than black. He looked at the paintbrush in his hand that was dripping even more black.
Black was sorrow. Black was anger. Black was depression. Black was Joshua. Black was Max.
~DA~
Alec was a master fisherman. He'd brag about it if he had someone to talk to aside from the penguins and the mice. Who was he kidding? He did talk about it to the penguins and the mice. He used his knife to carve a line into one of the walls of his trailer for every day that he had been there. It had been about two months, give or take a few days since he still didn't know how long he'd been at sea.
"Don't even think about it Mole," he huffed out as he shot a glare at the penguin who was eyeing the fish who was nibbling at his line.
It's what he'd been reduced to. Naming the penguins after his old friends in order to try and keep some level of sanity as the solitude slowly ate away at him. He had considered a time or two that the naming of the penguins- especially after his friends- might actually be a sign of insanity. He'd waved the thought away though because he was Alec and he needed to talk. It was just what he did. He felt better about it if he felt like he was talking to someone other than himself.
He knew the whole island better than the back of his hand. It was roughly eight miles long and four miles wide and it was a friggin' rectangle. Not once had he seen a boat or heard any air traffic. There were no big predators other than him and the only other mammal living there seemed to be the mice. A lot of mice. Pretty big for what they were too. The notes he'd found his second day there had mentioned that they attacked and killed the albatross chicks and having witnessed it in person he'd readily admit to them being brutal, vicious little fucks and he had no qualms killing and roasting them when he needed a little pick me up.
He hadn't eaten penguin. It would practically be cannibalism since they were now named after his buddies in Terminal City. Only they were cuter. He had caught himself a few birds and while albatross tasted like albatross he pretended that it tasted like chicken.
Mostly he existed off of seafood. Fish, crab, oyster, squid. Hell sometimes he even caught lobster. Funny how he had to come to the edge of the world to eat like a king and for free even. He still had most of his scavenged cans of food and he planned to save them for emergencies.
There wasn't any fresh water sources incredibly near to where he lived, he assumed that the people who had been there before probably had their water supply choppered in given the presence of a mostly destroyed helo pad, but he had found enough water bottles that he easily made trips to his little lake to fill them up. That was also where he took his showers. He really wished he could hook a water heater up to his waterfall though.
The fish finally took the bait and Alec quickly and expertly reeled it in. Mole eyed it hungrily and, when it had finished cooking over the fire he made, Alec took pity on his little buddy and tossed him a small piece. Of course that immediately caught Max's attention and she came over to check it out.
"All incarnations of you turn out to be a nosy little bitch," he told her fondly, throwing her a small piece of his well gotten gains as well. He brought a hand up to scratch at his chin and even though it had been steadily growing since before he'd even landed on the island he was still caught off guard by the beard that had taken over the bottom half of his face.
There weren't any mirrors that had survived whatever had happened on the island so all he had to judge his appearance by was his reflection on the still waters of his pond. He had never had a beard before, people more more likely to cozy up to a clean shaven face. He didn't really like it so he did what he could by keeping it as short as possible with his knife.
Alec sighed, his eyes drifting to the ocean waves, frown on his face as he watched the breaking swells, the low flying albatross and the playfully swimming penguins. The air was chilled, cloud cover was nearly permanent in the region but he was fairly lucky that the temperature was fairly consistent. It was never hot, rarely warm but it wasn't freezing and after two months his body had adjusted and he was nearly always comfortable.
Rain was common and Alec barely even noticed the drops anymore. He chose to stay inside sometimes when there was a particularly heavy downpour but otherwise he went about his day as though he didn't notice the moisture in the air. He rarely wore his shirt, choosing to keep it in his trailer to keep it in one piece for when winter made an appearance. His shoes were wearing thin and he was dreading the day that they were rendered useless and he had to brave the rocky shores with bare feet even though he knew his body would easily adjust to that too.
He wished that he could say he was optimistic that rescue would come before winter but as the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months his hope dwindled. It was just him and his penguin friends and holy fuck he was lonely.
Not a sound was heard through the afternoon air. Leaves weren't crunching. Birds weren't singing. The tension was thick and it seemed like the island itself seemed to be holding it's breath as it waited for something to explode. There was a predator on the island and it's prey were deadly silent.
A startled squawk suddenly rang out through the still air before cutting off mid-sound. Alec grinned predatorily at the ten inch bird in his hands, it was one of the Whalebirds that called the island their home, it was grey and white and had a blue bill that was broad and had a comb like filtration system in it's bill that Alec knew helped filter food from the seawater. "Hello dinner," he muttered as he turned and walked noiselessly through the trees back to the southern part of the island where weeks ago he'd set up his cook pit.
He'd barely noticed when the changes started taking place but every once in awhile some part of his mind would awaken and snap at him to wake up and take a look around. He'd always been stealthy, it was how he'd been created. Still, when he'd first arrived on the island he could easily retrace his steps if he took a wrong turn and follow the broken twigs and bent leaves back to where he had begun. Now though, it was like his feet barely touched the ground regardless of whether he was walking or running.
It was impossible for him to get lost and had been since the sun set on his first week on Gough Island, after all, it wasn't exactly huge. He mostly kept himself fed with sea life but occasionally something that didn't taste like saltwater called to him and that's when he caught himself a bird or, it he was feeling particularly desperate or lazy, mice.
The birds had learned quickly to be wary of him, all except for the penguins anyway. The mice though, well they were bold little fucks who probably thought they'd eventually take him down like he was an albatross chick.
His weeks hadn't just been filled with hunting and fishing. He'd also built a latrine system that had taken a long while due to his lack of tools but he'd spent long hours working on it, sometimes from dawn until dusk only to start again with the dawning of the next day. It was hard work and it kept him occupied so that he wasn't constantly dwelling on his less than favorable circumstances. Weeks later he had himself a narrow twenty foot hole, made possible due to his Manticore gifted jumping abilities. It had been incredibly uncomfortable and he had done everything he could to keep his mind off of the reason why he was digging it.
He used the wreckage from the buildings that hadn't survived the fire to build walls and a roof and was even able to attach a door...you know, for privacy, he had thought with a mirthless cackle. He'd scavenged an old, large, rust filled bucket that had been half buried by the helo pad and painstakingly removed the bottom of it with sharpened rocks in order to save the blade of his single knife. Once the bottom was removed and he was left with a hollowed out cylinder he attached one of the old toilet seats also scavenged from the wreckage and placed it on top of the bucket before placing the whole shoddy project over the narrow, deep hole in the ground.
"I give you, my shit house," Alec had proclaimed the evening he'd finally finished it. A mouse that had been nibbling on something nearby cocked it's head momentarily before scurrying quickly away.
It had been finished a few weeks earlier and since then Alec had tried to come up with more projects to keep himself busy. He tried desperately to make a radio out of the random items left behind in the main building but there just wasn't any power source and one night, after a particularly lonely and stress filled day Alec roared in rage and threw the scattered, useless pieces forcefully away from him before turning his fury on the desk. He upended it easily, grabbing a chair next and smashing it into one of the walls, his chest heaved as he watched the pieces shatter and he was left holding what was left of the back.
With another broken roar he heaved that away from him as well before turning his fists to the metal walls, pounding at them until they were dented and blood smeared. Then he'd collapsed in a heap as he choked out dry sobs, tears burning at his eyes though he refused to let them fall.
Alec plucked the feathers, gutted, cleaned and prepared his bird for the fire. He glanced down at his bruised, cracked knuckles once the bird was placed on the spit and flexed them, relishing in the burn as some of the wounds reopened. His melt down had only happened two nights earlier. Lydecker would be ashamed of him, he thought wryly, here was after only a couple months of solitude already cracking under the pressure of being alone. He felt like he was in the hole again only it was more hopeless now because he didn't know if he'd ever be getting out.
He sought the pain out to remind himself of who he was and what he'd survived. He let the pain burn through him as he reminded himself that he was a survivor first and foremost.
Alec added another notch to his makeshift calendar before slumping back down onto his bed. One hundred and thirty three days, give or take a couple. More than four months, a little over one third of a year. He wondered, as he often did, how his old friends back in Terminal City were fairing. Had they found new avenues to bring in supplies after losing his contacts? Were they still holed up in the city or had they managed to broker a deal with the government as they'd been on the brink of doing before his crash?
Did they still think of him? Did they hold out hope that he might have survived? Did they keep a whether eye out for any sign from him? Had they all just accepted the false truth of his death? Had they moved on? Did they talk about him in quiet moments? Remembering him as he once was?
He sighed, laying on his cot and staring blankly at the ceiling. One leg was bent at the knee, foot on the ground and the corresponding arm was dangling down next to it. Depression threatened to swallow him whole. An all consuming darkness was constantly present within his mind and he could see it out of the corner of his eye as it awaited him. He hadn't eaten in a few days. He'd managed to make himself move long enough to add a tally mark to the wall, to sip some water and to take a piss or shit. He didn't have the energy to hunt or fish or hell, even dredge up the crab pot and see if he'd caught anything.
He certainly didn't have the energy to kill and prepare whatever catch he might get. His eyes glazed over as he stared at the same crack on the ceiling for hours, he could almost hear the distant tick of an imaginary clock. Alec was built for solo missions but he'd never been good at being alone. This was hell. He was in hell. He'd never believed in hell before, or God or heaven, after all a power crazed scientist somewhere was his version of a god, but now he was sure that it existed. Whether it was right here on this island or whether he really did die in that plane crash and this was the afterlife he'd earned after a lifetime of bad deeds was the only thing he didn't know for sure.
The imaginary clock kept ticking but still Alec didn't move.
He'd always prided himself on his ability to survive. He'd survived months of torture during his decades at Manticore. Months of brainwashing and reindoctrination and a lot of it had been done on behalf of the actions of another. He'd survived it all.
Alec had never been suicidal. Part of him had always enjoyed life, even back at Manticore he had been one of the ones who'd been able to make the most of what little he was given. Freedom had been a welcome shock and his zest for life had increased a hundred fold.
No, Alec had never been suicidal but as he sat on the rocky shore near his penguin friends after leaving his trailer for the first time in nearly two weeks. As he sat there with his switchblade in his hand, eyes intently studying the blade, he wondered if survival was really worth it.
Something nudged at his foot and he looked down to see his penguin version of Max peering up at him and he swore she looked curious and solemn and like she cared. His laugh was brittle because goddamn he really was losing it but still, he tucked the blade away and put it back in his pocket and he lived to survive another day.
~DA~
Sometimes- okay all the time- she wondered where he was if he really had survived. It would have to be somewhere remote. He'd have been stranded and unable to reach out to them or make his way home. She knew this with a certainty that was unshakable. He might have started off as her unreliable, reluctant side kick but Alec would die for any one individual in Terminal City and he certainly wouldn't stay away if he'd had any choice in the matter.
She imagined him on a tropical island, toes wiggling in the sand as colorful parrots flew overhead, drinking some kind of hastily made jailhouse jungle juice out of a coconut as he waited for her to find him. She imagined walking up to him finally, after over six months of not seeing him.
She imagined his bronzed skin, tanned deeply from the warm sun, she imagined the light shades that would be in his sun streaked hair as he sauntered up to her with that smirk that she never thought she'd miss so badly. He's say "What took you so long, Maxie?" and she'd cuff him aside the head for daring to take such a long vacation and then she'd pull him into a tight hug and apologize for taking so damn long.
On her more realistic days- not the ones where she truly believed that he was dead but the ones when she pictured the man that she knew lost somewhere in the world- she worried about how he would be holding up if Joon hadn't made it. Even on a tropical island with warm beaches, coconuts and chattering monkeys she knew that Alec would hate to be alone.
"I always hated the hole the most," he'd confessed to her once a long time ago. "Even more than the laser, I think. The solitude, you know? The loneliness. You know how I'm a social butterfly," he had said with a laugh as he tried to negate the seriousness of his confession with a joke.
She knew that isolation took it's toll and Alec was one of the most sociable people she'd ever met. Sometimes...and she'd never admit it out loud, but sometimes the thought of him being in complete isolation for over half a year ate at her to the point where she thought that maybe it would be better if he hadn't survived the plane.
The guilt after such a thought was almost unbearable.
Max didn't always stay there, she still had her apartment in Terminal City but Original Cindy kept her old room open for when her boo needed to get away. When they'd been granted citizenship two months prior she had assumed Max would move back in and things would go back to some semblance of the normal they'd lived a few years earlier.
It was a naïve thought though because citizenship was just the beginning. Max was elected to run Terminal City and, while the transgenics and transhumans didn't have to stay there it was highly encouraged and most of them had found a home there anyway. Max had found a home there.
Most of the time Original Cindy would admit to herself that Terminal City wasn't really Max's home and neither was her apartment. No, her girls home was lost. Maybe at the bottom of the Atlantic or maybe stranded on some forgotten plot of land. She wasn't sure if it was better or worse that Max and Alec had never gotten around to actualizing their feelings for each other before he went missing.
She leaned against her bedroom door frame and watched quietly as Max sat in the window sill, head turned towards the pane of glass, watching the rain fall heavily down. Cindy wondered if it was raining where Alec was, if he was even still alive. Max swore that she felt that he was still out there. Alive but lost. Sometimes Cindy wondered if that was a good thing or not.
Alec was her friend too, she loved that boy like the annoying little brother she'd never had, but Alec loved people and for the life of her Original Cindy couldn't imagine him stranded, lost and lonely with no one to talk to and no hope of being found. It sounded like hell on earth and she wouldn't wish that on her worse enemy.
She sighed soundlessly and turned back into her room, leaving Max to her thoughts as sorrow threatened to overwhelm them both.
When he wrote about life after the siege he couldn't help but mention Alec. Alec wasn't there when his people were granted their freedom. He wasn't there to celebrate or complain about the conditions they'd been laden with. He wasn't there physically but he was there in spirit. He was on everyone's mind as they drank their fill and partied all night. He was there at the edge of room, the sorrow filled pocket that everyone had tried to avoid but couldn't help but touch a time or two.
He was there in the toasts that were shared after glasses clinked and shouting stopped. He was such a big part of getting the citizens of Terminal City to the point that they'd been accepted and acknowledged by the Amercian government and no one wanted to voice the thought on everyone's mind. That it was a damn shame that he wasn't there to witness what he had helped make possible for them.
At the end of the night, when everyone who wasn't going to drink until the next night started to think about filtering home it wasn't "Too freedom!" that was shouted all around the room it was "Too Alec!"
Sketchy stared into his pitcher of beer as he sat slumped at one of the tables in Crash. His latest article had been a hit, he even scored a front page expose. It had been picked up by bigger papers because, somehow Calvin Theodore had become a name associated with integrity despite the magazine he worked for.
Along with a picture of some of the citizens of Terminal City, Max's smiling face and sad eyes at the forefront, he had included a picture of Alec that he'd taken a lifetime ago when they'd all been nothing but bike messengers to print with the article. He was smiling, eyes dancing with mischief as they were known to do. It was a good picture.
Sketchy still hung out with Original Cindy frequently. He saw Max less but she had a lot of responsibility as life in Terminal City, Seattle, Washington and the United States of America in general shifted and merged into some new kind of normal. He had a lot of friends within Terminal City and he still, for some reason he couldn't quite answer, kept his job at Jam Pony as a part time thing so he had friends there too.
He and Alec had grown pretty close over the three years they'd known each other though and the mystery behind what exactly had happened to him. If he died in the plane crash or later on, lost at sea, or if he had somehow managed to get to land somewhere, ate at the lanky reporter. He wished he had the resources to help in the search for information. He knew for a fact that Max, Mole, Dix and Luke still searched relentlessly.
He took a deep pull from his glass, draining it before pouring himself a refill from the pitcher. He could really enjoy losing a game of pool to his old buddy right about now.
He still looked from time to time. It wasn't high on his priority list anymore, not out of spite but because there just wasn't anything new. No leads, no trail to follow. He knew that his computer savvy counterparts in Terminal City were still looking as well and that they, too, were not finding anything.
He personally believed that Alec had been killed in the crash and he had been legitimately sad at the thought. He might not be his favorite person but the kid had made a big impact on the people in TC, a good impact and Logan couldn't blame Max for falling in love with him.
He still looked sometimes for her sake. She deserved to be happy and he didn't think she'd ever find that until she knew what happened to Alec, good or bad. He searched for Joshua, Cindy, Sketchy, Mole and all the other people that cared for and loved Alec. He searched for his wife because Asha had also been a close friend of Alec's. He searched for himself too, because he liked to solve a mystery and there was a part of him that hoped he was wrong about Alec perishing at sea.
Nothing new, no new leads. Logan sighed and turned his attention back to his latest Eye's Only mission.
~DA~
Alec groaned as something nudge him as he laid sprawled out on the rocky shore of his tiny island. He opened his eyes and glared at Joshua. "Go away dude," he muttered, closing his eyes again. Joshua nudged him again though and this time he sat up with a frown and found that Dalton, Mole and Max were also standing near him and staring. "What the hell are you guys looking at?" he asked accusingly.
His irritation immediately left him when Mole waddled up to him, his yellow feathered crest blowing in the wind, and dropped a fish next to his feet. He stared, dumbfounded at the fish before looking back up to Mole. Dalton waddled up next and added another fish to the offering, followed by Max and then Joshua. "Holy shit," was all he could think to say as he stared at the animals before him.
He had shared his fish with them many times over the last eight months and it seemed that they were now returning the favor. He was so caught of guard that he didn't even bother to give them crap for not cooking them first. He slowly reached down and grabbed the four small fish. It would be a decent lunch.
He made short work of cleaning and cooking them at the fire pit he kept up at the shore. He had them placed all over the island so that he didn't have to go back to a specific location to eat. He had also made them in case he ever needed to build a signal fire.
Once they were finished he tossed a fairly large piece to each of the penguins who had contributed to the feast and finished the rest of it himself. He chuckled and shook his head, he must look really pathetic if the wildlife were trying to take care of him.
The penguins on the island were pretty much the only thing he enjoyed anymore so he spent the majority of the time where they were most likely to hang out which was on the shore. He rarely spent time in his trailer anymore, it was too easy to give into the sucking pit of despair. He had also taken up carving. He had started whittling a few months earlier once he'd finally snapped himself out of his near suicidal depression.
He had long ago knocked down as many small trees as he could to keep near his fire pits in case he ever heard a plane or saw a boat. As time passed and rescue seemed less and less likely Alec had absently picked up one of the branches and started cutting away at it. His first attempt had been...well he's still not sure exactly what it was. It was kind of bird shaped but also kind of blob shaped but he'd kept it nonetheless.
He got a feel for it after a short while though, he'd always been a quick study, and now he entertained himself by carving replicas of the penguins he was closest to. They each had subtle distinguishing markings that allowed him to tell them apart and he carefully mimicked the markings on his carvings. The finished products went onto one of the few shelves that had survived one of his angry outbursts in his trailer.
It had been two hundred and fifty six days since he'd landed on the island and another six or seven since the plane had crashed. It had been more than eight months. Closer to a year than not. Alec sometimes felt a stillness settle within him. It wasn't always there, there were still days when rage nearly consumed him or depression threatened to drown him.
He had his penguins though. He had his carvings and he had started running. His shoes had long since fallen apart but, just as he knew they would, his feet had adjusted to the terrain and he actually felt more free without them. Most days he wore only his faded, worn and frayed jeans. No shoes, no shirt, no jacket. He didn't need them anyway.
He ran laps around the island. On his worst days that was all he did. He'd stop for some food, those were the days he usually utilized the canned food he was saving, and he make a pit stop at his waterfall for some fresh water and to cool down and then he'd start running again. He couldn't run from himself but he could drown out the darkness a little bit by keeping his mind focused on the exercise.
He rarely smiled but he did that day as he finished his gifted fish and watched as Max, Mole, Dalton and Joshua finished theirs. He had to hang on to the bright moments when they appeared because they were few and far between.
He hadn't bothered to trim his beard in a couple months but it had grown to the point where it was brushing against his chest, a constant reminder that he wasn't really Alec anymore, so he finally sat down at his little lake and carefully sawed a few inches off with his pocket knife.
After he was done he stripped off his jeans and boxers and dove into the cool water. He stayed beneath the surface for a long time, enjoying the feel of the fresh water as it rinsed the grit out of his eyes and off his skin. When he finally surfaced he did so right beneath the waterfall. His breath gasped out at the sensation of the cold, pounding water but it made him feel alive so he soaked up every moment of it.
He swam in the lake for hours that afternoon, it was a rare warm, sunny day and he was actually enjoying himself. When he eventually pulled himself out of the pool of water he walked, still naked, up to the rocks jutting out from the top of the waterfall and laid down on it, allowing the sun to dry his skin and the warmth settle back into his bones.
He didn't have many peaceful days but that one was a good one and he savored every second of it, filing away the way he felt, the way things tasted and smelled, so that he had a good memory to draw on during his darker days.
Alec refused to eat octopus. He watched a documentary in his downtime while he was on a mission once and had been completely fascinated by how smart they were. He had watched as an octopus, who was unhappy with the meal of fish that it's zoo keeper had given him, had easily broken out of it's aquarium, fish held in one of it's tentacles, and marched into the office of the keeper, threw the fish in the guys face before turning and marching back to his tank.
Alec had decided in that moment that the octopus was his spirit animal and nothing about living on the island had done anything to change that opinion. Sometimes one of the birds tried to drag one of the octopuses out of the water and while they occasionally succeeded he'd seen the large tentacled creatures deliver more than one beat down before slipping gracefully back into the water and swimming quickly away.
Occasionally he caught one in his crab pot as they attempted to steal his catch and every time it happened he rolled his eyes and let it go...usually tossing a crab at it for it's trouble. He had also watched in amusement as one would come up and watch the pot for a long moment as though it was working out a puzzle before carefully snagging one of his crabs and sneaking away with it's ill gotten gains.
Octopus and penguins. Forever safe from being caught in Alec's evil clutches.
Summer had been drawing to a close when Alec's plane had crashed and while he had dreaded winter in those first few months on the island it really had been mild. It snowed a bit in the interior of the island but the shores didn't even really get frosty. The temperature was pretty much the same year round he could now say with confidence, although there had been a few winter days where he'd dawned his shirt and coat. He'd also been his dark depression spiral during that time so a lot of time was spent in a daze within his trailer.
It was spring now, less than a month away from summer and it hit home just how close he was to his one year anniversary. His plane had crashed on September ninth and by his best calculation it was now May thirty first. Two hundred and sixty four days.
It felt like it had been so much longer.
~DA~
Max laid in her bed, eyes wide open and staring blankly at the ceiling. Today was September ninth. Today was an entire year since Alec and Joon had crashed into the Atlantic. They were having a celebration for them that night. It hadn't been Max's idea, she had no idea what it was they were supposed to be celebrating. Joon hadn't been all that well known, he had been quiet but dependable, and Alec had left a gaping hole with his disappearance. What was celebratory about that?
Joshua and Cindy and Sketchy planned it. Cindy had told her it was to celebrate the memory of them, to share stories and try to gain some kind of closure. Max wasn't ready for closure though so she wanted nothing to do with the party.
Oddly enough it was Mole that came and dragged her ass out of bed and forced her to make an appearance. "If I have to go then you have to go, your highness," he grumbled as he threw a shirt at her.
"What's the point?" she asked in frustration. "There is nothing to celebrate."
"Beats the hell outta me but you know damn well that Alec would be the first one partying it up. So maybe we go just because we know he would," Mole replied and Max couldn't fault his logic so she dragged herself up and allowed him to lead her to the party.
It wasn't quite as terrible as she'd expected. People didn't really talk about him being gone or how sad they were. They talked about the things they remembered about him.
"One time, we were like fourteen, Alec got the one of the guards to sneak in a porno mag in exchange for the pills they made us take. I swear that was the only time I ever actually felt like a fourteen year old boy in that place," Delfino chuckled as he recounted his Alec story.
"Remember when Alec snuck all that booze into the unit after his away mission when we were seventeen? Oh man, I'd never had as much fun as I did that night. We couldn't even get drunk but the fact that it was completely against the rules was enough to make us all feel high," Tanner laughed, shaking his head at the memory. "Then that guard, Baxter, opened the door to find out why we were all laughing so hard and Alec just smiled at the guy and asked if he wanted a drink."
"You guys didn't get sent to reindoc?" Sher asked incredulously.
"Nah, man! Baxter just took the shot and told us to keep it down! He was one of the only cool guys in that hell hole."
"I went into heat once, it was when Manticore was still trying to figure out what heat was, you remember? Anyway I was horny for every guy I laid my eyes on and they were all coming after me but I didn't really want it cuz I was like twelve, you know? Alec came up and pulled me to medical before anything bad could happen though. I know it affected him but for some reason he was the only one near by who was able to think straight. Best CO ever, I swear he saved my ass on the regular," Tru recounted.
Max smiled genuinely and laughed real laughs as she listened to the many, many stories that featured Alec and some of the ones that featured Joon too. She learned more and more about the man who never got the chance to find out that he'd stolen her heart and she soaked up the stories like a sponge. Clinging to every memory of him and falling for him even harder.
It was a good night and Max had thanked Cindy and Sketchy and Joshua. She had shared a grin with Mole and she knew that the lizard man had also come around to the odd celebration of their lost friends.
When she fell to sleep that night it was with a little bit of bitterness and a little bit of sweetness and a whole lot of gratitude towards her friends for somehow making the anniversary of the worst day of her life a little less dark.
One year, four months, three weeks and six days. It was February fourth, another new year had dawned and a loud shout had sounded from Dix as he called frantically for Max.
She darted out of her office and was at the computer terminals in seconds. "What is it?" she asked, heart pounding at the thought that trouble might be knocking at their door and breaking up the fragile peace they'd been living in for over a year now.
"I think I found something from the plane crash!" Dix said excitedly as he pulled up a satellite image. Max's heart jumped and her eyes squinted to try and figure out what she was looking at. "There!" Dix exclaimed as he pointed at a small white spot on the screen that was attached to a mass of land.
"What is it?" she asked again as Mole and Joshua came bounding up behind her. Dix clicked a button on the mouse a few times and enlarged the image. Max's breath caught in her throat as she made out the image of what looked like wreckage from a plane. "Is that a wing?" she asked breathlessly.
"Yes!" Dix answered immediately. "I already emailed the image to Logan and he's working on clearing it up with his Eye's Only software," he told her. "It may not be from Alec and Joon's plane but I've been monitoring the entire Atlantic ever since he went down and there haven't been any other plane crashes since theirs.
"Where is it?" Mole grunted out, his jaw clenched tight around his cigar.
"South Atlantic, thousands of miles off their charted course, hell it's thousands of miles away from where their plane went down. It's the Tristan da Cunha, they're a remote group of volcanic islands," he told them. "This one, where the wing is, is called Inaccessible Island."
"Jesus, all this time we were looking in the completely wrong area," Mole grit out, feeling helpless and angry all at once.
A call came in suddenly and Dix opened the video chat. Logan's face popped up and he looked cautiously optimistic as he looked at the group at the other end of the call. "Took some doing but I managed to get a clear read of the serial numbers on the wing. It's Alec's."
A loud cheer rang out from just about everyone, a large group had gathered while they were waiting for further information, at the first new piece of information since the first week following the plane crash.
"Is there any way it could have drifted there by itself?" Max asked, unwilling to get her hopes up quite yet.
"Doubtful with how far it traveled from the rest of the wreckage," Dix replied just before Logan spoke back up.
"We've been monitoring the tides since the crash and while there is a very, very minute chance it could have drifted that far by itself it seems far more likely that someone was using it as a raft," Logan told them and by his disbelieving laugh Max could tell that he was completely shocked at the possibility.
"Can you tell if there is any signs of life by the satellite images?" was her next question.
"We're looking now," Logan assured her with a soft smile and a sparkle in his eyes. "Hurry up!" Asha's voice rang out just before she popped into the frame. "I'm dying here!" she exclaimed as she and Max made eye contact and Max felt the hope welling within her, threatening to burst past the dam she'd carefully crafted.
"I'll talk to you soon," Logan promised before ending the call.
Max once again felt like the world had frozen but this time she welcomed the feeling because she had a feeling that any semblance of calm was about to fly out the window. She heard Dix chattering excitedly about letting her know as soon as they had more information and she numbly nodded and turned back to her office. Closing the door behind her and letting the first sob escape.
Logan's promise of soon took way too long in Max's opinion. Original Cindy, Sketchy and Normal had long since arrived within city limits to await further news along with the rest of them. The sun had fallen hours earlier and Max looked around from her perch on the catwalk above the ground floor at all the people lounging around head quarters. There were people curled up in chairs and couches, people stretched out on the hard floor. Groups playing cards or having a drink. There were some that were-
"Found something!" Max bolted to Dix's side and the rest of the occupants surged forward like a tidal wave.
Logan and Asha popped back up in the video chat too. "What is it?" Max asked, it was her catch phrase for the evening.
"There are no signs of human habitation on Inaccessible Island," Logan told them. "So we expanded our search to the other islands in that area using satellite images from before the crash and from after it. All but one show no change," he said with a large smile.
Dix picked up where he left off. "Gough Island is the southernmost island of the Tristan da Cunha, it's seventeen hundred miles away from South Africa-"
Mole cut in. "Let's save the geography lesson for later," he growled out, waving his hand to urge Dix to get to the point.
"Right," the transhuman said sheepishly. "This is what it looked like before Sept. 9th 2022," he said pulling up an image of a part of the island that had a burned out series of buildings. "It used to have a weather station but that went down after a major electrical fire burned out most of the buildings and equipment. It was after right the pulse so they didn't have resources to rebuild and it's been uninhabited ever since," he explained. "Except about a month after the plane crash this new building popped up," he said excitedly as he pulled up a new image and circled the building in question with his mouse cursor.
"What is it?" it was Cindy's turn to ask as she cocked her head at the small rectangular building, Dix zoomed in and they were able to make out the blurry details of roughly put together debris that looked scavenged from the other buildings, it came complete with a door.
"Our guess?" Logan spoke up. "An outhouse," he told them, his grin unwavering. "We can't really get any clearer images because they're so pixelated so we can't bring up photo evidence of the person who built it but here's what the island looks like today," he said as he sent an image to Dix who brought it up side by side the first image.
"Along with the new structure Max's trained eyes could make out that the forest on the island was a little thinner than before which wouldn't be too alarming except that there were also what looked to be large pyres placed around the island. She imagined they'd make a decent sized signal fire.
"Oh my god," she breathed out. It may not be Alec. It could be Joon or it could be the both of them, she hoped it was the both of them so that Alec hadn't been alone for nearly a year and a half.
"I already got in contact with an old friend of mine who owes me big and happens to own his own helicopter," Logan told her, looking right at her with a beaming smile. He continued talking, giving Dix the information for the airfield but Max was already running out of HQ and to her apartment to pack.
She hit up Alec's long empty apartment after hers and grabbed fresh clothes for him. There was something deep within her soul that just knew that it was him that would greet her on that remote island in the middle of the South Atlantic.
~DA~
Alec sputtered as a rogue wave crashed over his head and infiltrated his lungs. He'd started swimming on the one year anniversary of his arrival to the island. He didn't have any way to make a raft that would be secure enough to withstand the angry ocean so he swam instead. It was incredibly stupid, he knew that but it was better than sitting on his ass waiting for a rescue that wasn't coming or running another lap around the island that he knew better than he'd ever known any other place in his life.
As far as he could tell there wasn't any other islands anywhere near him, at least not within transgenic swimming distance. He had methodically made his way around the island, choosing a different launch point every day and swimming as far out as he could before he knew he'd be too tired to make the trip back.
After he'd exhausted his swimming options and convinced himself that there was really nothing he could do unless he wanted to swim until he drowned he finally gave that up and focused instead on rebuilding his signal fire points. There had been a particularly violent storm in late fall, something he had avoided his first winter there, and it had destroyed a lot of his previous hard work.
He built them taller and wider. He did this, mostly, just to keep himself busy and not because he had any real hope of ever using them.
He ran and he swam and he built and he carved. He hung out with his penguins and he hunted and he fished. He ran through the motions and he pretended that the darkness wasn't still calling to him and that the depression wasn't his only real friend.
Sometimes, usually at night when he was in his trailer all alone with no penguins to talk to, he allowed the darkness in. He allowed the choking depression to consume him. It was a dangerous game and one day, one year, one month and four days after he'd arrived on the island, the new day dawned and Alec couldn't release the depression.
It was worse than it had been nearly a year earlier, if he'd chosen to think about it he might have noticed that it seemed to get the better of him as the season was changing to winter. He wasn't suicidal that time around, he was just despondent. He no longer talked. Not to himself or to his penguins or to the mice that he hated.
He didn't laugh or whistle, sing or hum. He didn't even know what his own voice sounded like anymore. He didn't smile, not when Max pecked at him or when Mole stole his fish. Not when Joshua nudged him or Dalton stumbled and fell over thin air. Dalton was the clumsy one and it used to amuse Alec.
He lost all sense of time. He'd stopped marking down the days. He'd stopped watching the ocean for ships or the sky for planes. He'd stopped listening to anything outside the sounds of the island. Sometime into his second winter alone on an island he doubted most people had ever even heard of Alec lost himself.
He couldn't picture the faces of his friends, the human(esque) versions anymore. Not clearly. When he thought of Max his minds eyes conjured up a penguin. When he thought of Mole or Joshua, Cindy or Sketchy, Dalton or Logan he just saw penguins.
He didn't know how long it had been since he'd been himself. He didn't keep track anymore. He knew that it had been weeks since he stopped scratching the tally marks into his wall. He sat cross legged at the bottom of his lake, holding his breath like he'd been forced to do when he was a kid.
He couldn't hear anything but his heartbeat and the roaring of the waterfall. He didn't hear the blades of the helicopter as it circled overhead.
~DA~
Max looked anxiously out the window of the chopper as they circled Gough Island. They'd been flying for nearly two days with a pit stop somewhere in there so they could refuel and the pilot could get a few hours rest. They weren't able to land on the island so Logan had set up supply ship that had a helideck. The only issue is it took more than a week for it to travel to the island from Cape Town, South Africa so Max, Mole, Priya, Sketchy and Joshua had had to wait an additional week to even leave Seattle.
She had thought the previous year and five months had been hellishly long but that was nothing compared to being forced to wait when they knew that someone was on that island just waiting for a rescue. Thanks to their freedom Mole and Joshua had been able to come along. Original Cindy and the rest of the Terminal City population had wanted to come too but the helicopter only held seven and they needed to save two seats just in case both Alec and Joon had made it.
Sketchy made the trip due to his status as a reporter. Max was leery about having Alec's possible rescue documented but if anyone was going to do it she was glad it was Sketchy. If anything went sideways she could count on him to lose the story like he'd never even had it.
They circled the island twice looking for any sign of Alec or Joon before turning and heading towards the supply ship. She kept an eye on the small island the entire time, waiting to see one of the signal fires light up. Her heart dropped a bit when none did.
They departed the chopper immediately and ran towards the boat waiting to take them to shore. The island was incredibly rocky so the man steering the boat could only take them so close before they had to jump out and swim. They made short work of the distance with Priya keeping a solid hold of Sketchy.
Penguins were the first thing Max noticed when she was able to touch the ground and walk onto the shore. A lot of penguins. It was cold there too, not unbearably so- at least for a transgenic- but it definitely wasn't some tropical oasis filled with warm, white sandy beaches and coconuts.
There was a small group of penguins that stuck together and they eyed them curiously. Keeping their distance but seemingly unafraid of them. Sketchy thought they were the coolest thing he'd ever seen and immediately started taking pictures of them.
"The old weather station is on the southern part of the island, we came in on the eastern side," Priya called out, eyeing the penguins as she softly walked around them, giving them a wide berth as she started to head towards the tree line.
Max was right by her side, keeping a sharp eye out for any sign of Alec. She noticed that they made a very noticeable trail in their wake but there didn't seem to be anything disturbing the forest floor before them and she frowned. They were quiet as they walked and after a few clicks they entered a plateau and turned right to head south towards where they knew the buildings were. It was another few clicks before they reached them,
She looked out over them from where they stood on a small hill and they all shared a look before quickly moving towards them, they didn't wait for Sketchy to catch up. They entered the main building first and Max's breath caught in her throat as she took in the sight of an overturned, splintered table, the shattered remains of what she thought might have been a chair and the blood stained wall that was dented with what looked to be a fist.
She could almost taste the despair in the room. Joshua whimpered and Priya let out a sound that was a little choked. Max glanced at Mole and saw his fists tighten and his jaw clench around his cigar. Sketchy finally caught up to them. "Woah, dude," he muttered as he took in the damage. Max turned and walked out, ignoring the click of his camera as she did so.
The trailers that were placed further down were burnt out shells so they mostly just bypassed them. They finally came to the structure that had brought them there in the first place. Given what they thought it was no one was exactly eager to open the door but Max finally heaved a sigh and pulled it open.
There was surprisingly no smell but there was a large metal bucket sitting over the ground with a toilet seat sitting atop it. "Must have dug deep," Mole muttered. "Probably why it didn't show up on the satellite images until a few weeks after he got here."
Sketchy stepped forward and photographed that too.
The trailer closest to the cliff was relatively undamaged and she hesitated briefly before opening the door, her heart in her chest as she considered the possibility that he might be in there. He wasn't. However it was definitely his home. There was a cot that had been recently slept in. A few canned goods sitting on what was left of a counter, it looked like whoever was living here had taken some more anger out on this room at one point.
"This is Alecs," Priya suddenly spoke up as she picked up an old worn jacket that had definitely seen better days. Max's eyes burned with tears at the confirmation that it was him. He had survived and he was currently somewhere on the same island that she was.
"Alec shirt too," Joshua said, his voice subdued and Max knew that despite the joy they felt at finding out that Alec had survived they could all also feel the hopelessness that encased the buildings. Her attention was caught by something else. "Only Alec, no one else," he said as he breathed in deeply.
"He stopped counting," she said in a choked whisper, barely hearing what Joshua had just said.
"What?" Sketchy asked, looking up from where he was snapping pictures of something on a shelf.
"He was counting his days here," she said as she pointed at a wall filled with tally marks. It hurt to see his time put up there so baldly. It was so much time. "He stopped over four months ago," she said and her heart stuttered at what that could mean.
Mole came back in for the tail end of what she was saying. "The fire pit out front is still smoldering, Max. He's alive," he assured her.
"Which means he lost hope," she murmured sorrowfully.
"Kid picked up a hobby though," the lizard man said, trying to refocus her as he pointed out the carvings displayed on one of the remaining shelves. Max gasped as she looked at them. Most of them were penguins, each on slightly different. Some were albatross. There was one octopus that he'd painstakingly added detail to. There was one that was kind of shapeless and she wondered if that was his first attempt, she kind of thought it looked like a bird. Another was a woman. It was just a silhouette but with her long hair, popped out hip with a hand placed on it Max thought- "I think that's you," Mole mused as his eyes roamed over the carving. Yeah, that's what she'd thought too.
~DA~
Alec stalked quietly through the foliage, his nose twitched and he stopped in his tracks as he smelled something that didn't belong. A lot of somethings that didn't belong. He moved stealthily through the trees, his eyes picking up every broken twig and misshapen branch. The scents were vaguely familiar but it had been so long since he smelled anything aside from mouse, bird and sea that he couldn't place them.
He followed the trail to his home. He recognized the guy going into his trailer after placing a hand over the remains of Alec's breakfast fire. It was Mole. The slightly human Mole, not the penguin Mole. He blinked and shook his head. The hallucinations were new and he realized with a distant sadness that he'd finally truly lost his mind.
~DA~
Sketchy got pictures of the markings on the wall just before they all filed back out of the trailer. "Should we just hang around here and wait for him to come back?" Priya asked.
"Joshua look for Alec," Joshua insisted firmly.
Max was about to speak up with the ocean breeze shifted and she picked up a new scent. Her head swung to the side, hair flying behind her, and her whole world froze. The rest of her group turned to what had captured her attention and everyone fell still.
"Alec," Max breathed out. He was standing about ten yards away, closer to the main building than to them, his muscles were coiled and his eyes were dark as he watched them. He wore only the tattered pair of jeans he'd worn the morning she'd last seen him and they were slung low on his hips. His hair was quite a bit longer and he'd lost weight but he'd gained muscle. A lot of muscle. He'd also gained facial hair and she'd be lying if she said that he couldn't pull it off.
"Man are you a sight for sore eyes," Sketchy exclaimed with a big goofy grin as he broke the silence. Max tensed as Alec's head slowly cocked to the left as he assessed them.
"Shit," Mole muttered. "He might have gone native."
They had talked about the possibility of him being feral during their long trip but Max didn't think that was the case here. She saw the intelligence and awareness in his eyes. "Alec?" she said hesitantly. "I know that it took us a long time to find you, too long. Way, way too long," she admitted guiltily. "It is us though. It's me, Max. And Mole, Joshua, Sketchy and Priya...Original Cindy wanted to come but we didn't know if Joon survived too so she had to stay behind. She's waiting in Seattle," she told him softly. She saw something flicker in his eyes at the mention of Joon but he remained silent.
"Alec, you remember that mission back when we were fifteen? I fell into one of those deep ground traps and broke my leg, remember?" Priya asked. "I was stuck there for like eighteen hours but it felt like eighteen years and when you found me you told me I was a feral little drama queen and if I didn't stop you'd throw me back down," Max frowned and shot the other woman an incredulous look as she wondered where her story was going. Mole looked just as stumped as he side eyed the female X5.
"I've decided that you won back when you told me that you bet me that you would have lasted way longer," she continued. "Because you stopped counting at fourteen months and I stopped at fourteen hours and this is why you were the CO. You're way stronger than the rest of us and so right now I'm telling you that you are notyou're feral...although you do kinda have a history of being a drama queen," she said with a tiny grin.
"Alec come home now," Joshua added with baleful eyes. "A lot of people waiting, miss Alec. Joshua miss Alec."
"I only came to see if you managed to build a still on this depressing rock," Mole told him with a shrug.
Max's heart jumped as Alec's lips twitched at Mole's comment.
~DA~
The problem with his hallucination theory is that his brain hadn't been able to conjure up an accurate image of any of the people standing before him for months. He certainly didn't remember their scents well enough to be breathing them in so realistically. He glanced away from them, looking back to the clumsy trail that marked their path. If it was a hallucination then it was the most elaborate one he'd ever had.
"Alec?" Max's soft voice reclaimed his attention and he turned his focus back to her. She seemed relieved that he still knew his name judging by the look in her eyes when he looked back at her. "We have a boat, it's on the eastern part of the island. It's there to take us to a ship that has a chopper on board to take us back to Seattle. I know that flying is probably the last thing you want to do but It's the fastest way off this island," she told him, keeping her voice slow and soothing as she explained the plan.
He watched them as he considered her words.
~DA~
The relief Max felt when Alec responded to his name was immediate and overwhelming. He hadn't made a sound so far and she couldn't remember him ever being so quiet for so long. When he moved she was caught of guard and she couldn't help but watch in awe as his moved silently, the ground didn't register his footsteps and his muscles seemed to ripple with his movement. He looked every bit like he belonged with the island and it broke Max's heart.
He gave them a wide berth as he walked past them. He jumped easily up onto a large rock that jutted out past the treeline and he looked to the east. That was when she realized that he was confirming her story by looking for their ship. She noticed that he seemed to always keep one eye on them and the small group of rescuers had reached a silent agreement to keep still and allow him to come to them. Sketchy moved uneasily and Joshua placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.
What he saw seemed to satisfy him because he gave a single nod as though he were making a decision before turning to fully face them and jumping silently back down to the flat ground. He moved towards his trailer but he didn't take his eyes off of them and Max wasn't sure if it was because he didn't trust them or because he was afraid they'd disappear.
He walked through the door and she peeked around to watch as he grabbed his shirt and jacket, he wasn't wearing shoes and given the rough terrain she imagined that they'd worn out long ago. He put his shirt on but used his jacket as a makeshift bag as he carefully placed his beautiful little carvings into it. He stepped back once he had collected them all and took one last look at the place that had been his home, she watched as his eyes darkened as he looked at the wall that had served as his calendar.
He moved with a grace that transcended even transgenic standards as he came back out of the trailer. He still had yet to utter a sound but he paused and gave them one last searching look before he headed back towards the treeline and they all shared a look before quickly following him.
~DA~
He had jumped up onto the cliff to see if he could see the boat that Max had told him was there. He could, and when he used his enhanced vision to zoom in on it he saw the chopper she'd claimed was there as well. He gave himself a sharp nod as he decided that he would believe them until they gave him a reason not to.
He walked into his trailer and hesitated briefly before grabbing his shirt and pulling it on. The last time he'd worn it had probably been about a year ago, during his first winter. He thought about putting his jacket on too but it was a fairly warm day and he didn't want to overheat besides, he needed somewhere to put his carvings.
If anyone had told him when he'd first landed on this rock that he'd want souvenirs when he left he would have laughed in their face but those damn penguins had saved his life and his carvings were the only thing he had to remember them by. He grabbed one other thing from the counter to place in the jacket.
He turned and glanced at his cot and the wall behind it where he had marked his days off until he didn't. His mood darkened, the promise of rescue not enough to light up the dark. He turned quickly and left the only home he'd known for the last...however long it had been behind him. He gave the five people in front of him another sweeping look before he turned and headed towards the trees. Max had said that they came in on the East shore which is where he'd washed up so long ago. It was where his penguins were too.
He heard them loudly trampling over the ground cover behind him and held back a wince at the sound. When he got to the plateau he paused, glancing behind him and meeting Max's eyes as she watching him curiously. There was one other place he wanted to see one last time before he left. So instead of turning towards the east he headed straight ahead to the north and back into the tree cover.
"Wha—" he heard Mole start to question him before he was abruptly cut off and Alec's lips twitched as he could almost picture Max's elbow plowing into the transhuman's stomach to shut him up. "Bitch," the lizard man said as they continued to follow him.
It didn't take long to reach his waterfall. He heard Max gasp behind him and he cocked his head to study the clear blue water and bright green foliage that grew around it. He hadn't really looked at it and seen it's beauty since he'd first arrived there but it had become his safe place. He heard rapid clicking and his head snapped over, eyes narrowing as they landed on Sketchy and the camera he held in his hands.
Max's hand snapped out and caught the lanky blond on the back of his head. "Put it away, dumbass!" she hissed.
"I'm just trying to get an accurate documentation, Max!" he whined. "Alec! You came here because you like this place, right?" Sketchy asked, turning to address him. Alec didn't answer but he waited for the other man to continue. "I could get some pictures, you know? So you can look back at it sometime."
Alec considered that and, surprising everyone, he gave a curt nod before turning back to his waterfall. Pictures would be great but he drank in the sight of it in person in the hopes that it wouldn't fade from his memory as quickly as his friends once had.
When he'd drank his fill with his eyes he leaned down and drank his fill by swooping the water up in his cupped hand and bringing it to his mouth. Seattle water never tasted as fresh if he remembered correctly. Especially not in Terminal City.
He turned without warning and walked past them back towards the plateau. He heard the snapping of Sketchy's camera in his wake.
After a few clicks they were making their way down to the rocky shore and Alec hesitated and for the first time since he'd realized that his friends were really there he was reluctant to leave. He held up a hand, warning the others to stay back and they immediately complied. He grabbed the last thing he'd grabbed from his counter out of his jacket before gently setting it down.
He held the rather large fish that he had decided he didn't want for breakfast in his hands and broke it into smaller pieces as he approached the group of penguins that were his. They waddled up to him eagerly and he knelt down and passed them each a piece of the fish before popping the last portion in his mouth, one last meal together. For the first time in months Alec opened his mouth and forced sound out. "Thanks," he muttered almost inaudibly but Max chirped at him and Joshua nudged his hand and somehow he thought they understood.
He stood up and gave them one last look before turning towards the ocean and spotting the small boat that had brought the others to shore. "We have to swim out to it because it's so rocky," Max explained as she slowly sidled up to him, it was the closest he'd been to her since they'd said goodbye in Terminal City an eternity ago.
Alec nodded and bent down to retrieve his jacket, he rolled it so the carvings were tightly encased in the fabric before tying it around his waist. He stopped suddenly at his favorite fishing spot and reached down to raise the crab pot, he shook it, releasing let the three crabs and one lobster it had caught back into the ocean before collapsing it and turning to throw it far from the sea. It landed somewhere in the forest.
He then walked up an outcropping of rocks that overlooked a deep ocean pool and dove in. He cut through the choppy water with ease and was at the little skipper before the rest of the group had even gotten all the way into the water. He pulled himself up and over the edge of the boat and gave a nod to the man who was smiling wide at him.
The rest of the group joined them after a few minutes and after the last one was seated in the boat Mole glared at him. "Show off," he grunted as he crossed his arms over his chest. Alec didn't answer as he watched his island get smaller as they jetted away from it.
~DA~
When Alec had continued north rather than turning east Max had frowned but silently followed him, elbowing Mole when he tried to ask questions. Alec knew what he was doing and that was good enough for her which meant it was good enough for the rest of them. When they entered the little clearing that opened up to a beautiful crystalline pool of water with a picturesque waterfall she couldn't help the small exhalation of breath that escaped her.
It was gorgeous and she could see why Alec had wanted to see it one last time. Then Sketchy had started snapping pictures and Alec's immediate reaction had the entire group tensing as once and she couldn't help but smack her idiot friend.
She had been as shocked as the rest of them when Alec had nodded his permission for the reporter to keep taking them before bending down and drinking from what had obviously been his water source.
The rest of the trip to the shore had been made with a single minded focus and Max could tell that there were really very few places on the island that Alec had actually cared about. He had seemed to hate his trailer but the waterfall was different. It was peaceful. It was nothing compared to what she bore witness to once they reached the eastern shore.
He had thrown his hand out in a halt gesture and they all did so immediately, wondering at first if there was a threat. She had watched closely as he pulled a fish out of his jacket before setting the material down and walking smoothly towards the group of penguins that had been watching them curiously upon their arrival. Sketchy immediately started snapping photos again and she couldn't blame him, in fact she was glad that he was capturing the moment.
Max and the group watched as he tore the fish into pieces before lowering himself down, rocking back onto his heels before them. She watched in amazement as they eagerly clambered up to him and hungrily took the fish that he offered them. She watched as he brought the final piece up to his own lips and slowly ate it and she got the distinct impression that he had shared a great many meals with that group of penguins.
He spent a long moment with them and she knew that he was saying his goodbyes before he finally rose again and looked out towards the boat awaiting them. She walked up at let him know that they had to swim out to it, relishing in the closeness of him. He had nodded, seemingly unsurprised before tying his jacket around his waist and, instead of wading out into the water he leaned down to pull something out of the water and Max watched in surprise as a crab pot surfaced. Alec shook out his catch before tossing it away from the shore before walking around to a cluster of rocks that jutted out of the side of the cliff. Once he got to the edge he put his hands above his head and dove gracefully into the ocean.
He surfaced near the boat and was already waiting inside by the time the rest of them got all the way into the water. Max's lips at turned up at Mole's jibe once they were all seated but her attention was quickly captured by the unnamed emotion in Alec's eyes as he watched the island get smaller. She hesitated a moment before reaching over and gently placing her hand on his, which had been fisted on top of his knee. He glanced over in shock and she realized that it was the first time he'd had human contact in almost a year. She moved to slowly pull away but his fist had relaxed, his hand opening up and, while he didn't quite return her grip, he allowed her to wrap her fingers around his palm. She gave him a comforting squeeze.
~DA~
There was a lot of commotion on the boat and Alec flinched back as the guy he assumed was the captain asked if they were ready to fly off so he could return to South Africa.
South freaking Africa. Alec thought bitterly as he got a slightly better grasp on his location.
"Hold on," Max replied. "Alec? I brought some clothes for you, from your apartment. Do you want to change into them?" she asked softly, tucking her hand back into his in a silent show of support.
He nodded without much thought. He didn't care what he had to do in that moment if it meant getting a moment of quiet. Joshua quickly walked over to the chopper and pulled out a small duffle bag to bring to them. Max opened it and pulled out a fresh pair of boxers and jeans, a new shirt and some socks and shoes. She carefully handed them to him and the captain pointed the way to the bathrooms.
He closed the door loudly behind him and squinted against the florescent lighting. He caught sight of himself in the mirror and the clothes fell out of his hands as his grip slackened with shock. He was more thin than he'd ever been before. Not gaunt, really, just toned. All muscle, no fat. His beard was full and thick although he'd trimmed it as best he could recently so it wasn't overly long.
His hair was though. It had grown at least nine inches and was tousled from air drying during the boat ride. He pulled off his clothes and studied himself further. He was lean and despite there not being sun a whole lot of the time wearing nothing but jeans had given his upper body a deep tan. He slowly pulled on the new clothes Max had brought him. The first time he'd changed his outfit in over a year.
He sat back on the toilet as he put on his socks and shoes, they felt foreign on his feet and he immediately decided he hated the feel of them. Once he was done he sat there for a long moment, his head in his hands, his elbows on his knees. He barely heard the knock at the door or Max's voice calling his name. He didn't really register when it opened and she sunk down in front of him. He didn't notice her until her hands were on his, pulling them away from his face and replacing them with hers. Her deep chocolate eyes meeting his as she levered herself up and pressed her forehead against his.
"It's gonna be okay, Alec," she breathed out in promise. Then her arms were around his shoulders and her face was in the crook of his neck and god he'd missed the touch of another human.
~DA~
About ten minutes after Max had found Alec in the bathroom they were loaded up on the chopper and headed home. Those few heartbreaking moments they'd spent in the bathroom plagued Max as she thought back to the despondent man she'd walked in to find. He'd looked so lost. So broken. She wanted nothing in the world more than to help him put himself back together. Unfortunately for them in order to get to a place where he could do that peacefully they first had to survive the flight home and she wasn't entirely sure how he was going to react to it given how his last flight had ended.
Max had quietly asked the pilot to circle around the island one last time so Alec could look at it from an aerial view if he wanted and he'd willingly obliged. Alec seemed grateful as they slowly flew over it and she could see him mapping it out, memorizing every little detail, and when they'd turned away he didn't look back.
Over all he'd handled the flight better than she thought she would have. His eyes squeezed shut sometimes when they hit turbulence and his hands would squeeze whatever they could in a white knuckled grip but he didn't complain. Whether that was because he didn't feel the need or just because he'd thus far refused to talk though, Max couldn't be certain. His silence was unnerving and it, more than anything else, is what really worried her.
It was a long two days before they touched down at the private airfield in Seattle and she could tell that the journey had taken a lot out of Alec. When they departed the chopper she pulled Mole to the side.
"Call ahead to TC and tell them not to make it a circus. I want the streets clear. I see anyone sneaking a peek or trying to bombard him I'll kick their asses myself," she told him sternly.
"Way ahead of you, your majesty," Mole replied as he flipped open his phone and called head quarters.
She moved back to Alec's side and gave him a choice. "Car or bike?" she asked as she tilted her head and smiled warmly. He hesitated as he glanced between the car where Priya, Joshua, Mole and Sketchy stood and Max's long familiar black ninja. He moved towards the bike and Max beamed.
She climbed on and waited until she felt him slide on behind her, his arms wrapping lightly around her waist, before turning the engine over and pulling out smoothly onto the street. She waited for him to get used to it, to remember how to balance before she picked up speed and flew through the night down the nearly empty streets.
She had taken them the long way around even though she was anxious to get Alec settled because she wanted to give Mole and Priya a chance to get there first and run interference. Her plan worked too, because when they finally pulled into Terminal City every light in every apartment was on but the streets were empty and no one came up or called out to them. She saw faces watching them through their windows but she ignored them as she pulled up to their building.
Alec got off the bike and looked around at the city, his eyes taking in the great many changes that had taken place in his absence. Max took his hand. "Come on, let's get you settled in and, if you want, I'll tell you all about what's gone on while you've been gone," she told him as she turned and led them towards their apartments.
She hesitated outside his door. "There's not really anything in here. To eat, I mean. We kept all your stuff they way you left it but the food was going bad so…" she trailed off. "Also, it's occurred to me that you might not want to be alone after, you know, a year and a half of being alone," she rolled her eyes at herself and mentally slapped herself for shoving her foot in her mouth.
Alec reached out and squeezed her shoulder. She stopped her rambling and looked up at him, her stomach lurched at the small smile playing on his lips. He answered the question she failed to ask by moving past her and walking straight into her apartment, just like he used to. She sighed in relief and followed him inside, closing the door behind them.
~DA~
It was suffocating. All of it. The worried glances constantly thrown his way by Max and the others. The harsh sound of the helicopter blades. The wobble of the bird as it adjusted to wind sheer. The fact that he was up in the air again, long suppressed memories of his last flight played through his mind with a startling clarity that he hadn't thought himself capable of anymore.
It was disorienting. The quiet conversation from the other passengers. He hadn't heard anything but nature and the sound of his own voice in so long and even his voice had long since faded. The squawking of the radio from the pilot's headset, the buzzing of the engine, the whirl of the blades overhead. None of it was natural and somewhere along the way Alec realized that the sounds of the island had grown to be comforting.
It was bright. Alec was used to mostly overcast days, he was used to the world being so dark at night that he could see the stars, every star, for miles. He had never felt closer to the stars than he had on those long nights staring up at them from atop his trailer or from the rocky shore with his penguins. He'd stare at them and wonder if Max or anyone else he knew was staring at them too. Now, he was up in the sky with them and they'd never felt further away thanks to the city lights shining brightly below as they passed overhead. Hell even the interior of the chopper was bright. Flashing lights from the various controls and overhead lighting. Fake and fluorescent and it was jarring.
It was loud but Alec was almost thankful for that because no one looked at him and expected him to start talking. It wasn't that he couldn't or didn't remember how to. He'd managed a faint goodbye to his penguins, after all. It was just that...well he hadn't had anyone talking back to him in so long, anyone listening or expecting a reply. The thought of having to hold down a conversation, answer the questions about how he'd spent his time the last however long was overwhelming.
What would he say? 'I almost slit my wrists a time or two'? 'My best friends were a bunch of penguins and, oh yeah, I named them after all of you'? 'I thought I'd die there and, more importantly, sometimes I wanted to die there'? Or maybe 'What the hell took you guys so long'?
Yeah, the disorienting roar of the man-made world around him was much better than expectant silence. He could have lived without the turbulence though.
It felt like an eternity before they landed in Seattle and Alec knew a little something about what an eternity felt like. When Max had given him the choice between the car or her bike he really hadn't had a choice. The car was claustrophobic and filled with people who were all anxiously awaiting him to speak.
Her bike wouldn't block out the harsh world he found himself thrust into as well as the car but it also wouldn't allow for conversation. He chose the bike and Max had seemed pleased. He hadn't been in the city for a long time but he was fairly certain that she had taken the scenic route and he became more and more uncomfortable the longer they drove.
When she finally pulled into Terminal City he thought he might have known the reason for the extra long drive when there wasn't a soul in sight once they got through the gates. No one hounding him, expecting him to be the Alec they all once knew. He noticed other things too. Like how the gates were left wide open with only a couple sentinels on duty who were playing cards rather than closed up tight with the night crew on high alert.
Max stopped in front of a building that was no longer familiar to him although he recognized it. She startled him out of his examination of the city that looked almost nothing like how he'd left it by taking his hand and assuring him that she'd tell him everything he'd missed.
Too soon they were outside the door he'd recognized as once being his and the world tunneled in front of him so that it was just him and the door. The other side of the door would be empty and if he went in there then he'd be alone again. He didn't want to talk but he couldn't bear the thought of spending another night alone now that he was off his island.
Max seemed oblivious to the fact that his world was shattering but she seemed to reach the same conclusion anyway and the relief and gratitude he felt propelled him into motion as he walked past her to the apartment he'd remembered as hers. Once again she'd seemed pleased with his decision as she followed him inside.
He walked over to one of the windows and took in the sight of the city. He felt as though there must have been something wrong with him because he found himself wishing for his dark, damp, tranquil island that had done nothing but heighten his inner turmoil the entire time he'd been there. Maybe it was some type of Stockholm syndrome. Max was talking suddenly and Alec tuned in although his eyes stayed on the window.
"That meeting you and Joon had in Russia, the one just before you...well, anyway, it did what we were hoping and it opened a lot of doors for us. We were granted our freedom just a few months after you…" she trailed off and her voice was rough with emotion. She cleared her throat. "Anyway, that's why the gates are open now and the security is a little more lax. We had a few issues with the ordinaries at first but after over a year since being declared citizens a lot of the hostility as died down. People are free to come and go as they please, a lot of us chose to stay here though," she informed him.
~DA~
Alec wasn't looking at her as she spoke but she could tell he was listening. "Let's see, what else? Normal still runs Jam Pony as a slave driver. I did not go back to working there even though, get this, Normal offered me my job back," she told him, still kind of incredulous about that offer herself. She was disappointed at the lack of reaction though and forced herself to keep going. She wasn't used to having to do all the heavy lifting in a conversation and she was trying her hardest not to let her frustration get the better of her. A long time ago the duty of being the chatterbox fell to Alec. "I was elected to lead the city here though and keep everything peaceful and you know how that's a full time job," she said with a slight chuckle.
"You know, Cindy, she was advocating hard for us even before...well before. Once we got citizenship she became a kind of liaison between us and the Seattle PD. Can you believe that? My boo working it and keepin' the pigs on their toes," she laughed. "And Sketch's in depth, exclusive coverage of all that was happening here landed him a job at The Seattle Times. He left Jam Pony at that time too," she filled him in. He was still staring out the window. "Alec?"
He turned towards her and his eyes were so lost and sad that her breath was stolen from her and her heart broke for the millionth time since she'd saw him standing in front of her on that goddamn island. He cocked his head and gave her a slight nod. "Um...Logan married Asha! You know they were dating when you...so they're married and they seem really happy," she told him with a genuine smile at the thought of the poster couple for helping the downtrodden. She saw surprise flicker through his eyes.
"Are you hungry?" she asked, pointing to her kitchen. Alec shook his head though and his eyes flickered towards the bedroom. She realized then that he hadn't slept during the entire two day journey back to Seattle. They'd had some food on the flight, Alec had barely picked at it but she supposed it would be hard to get used to regular food again. "Tired?" she asked instead.
He shot her a small smile and it made her heart stutter in her chest. She moved forward and guided him into her room, he went along easily and she almost felt like he was so overwhelmed that she could lead him just about anywhere so long as he didn't have to focus on the world around him.
"I'm just gonna change, real quick," she told him before going to her dresser and pulling out two different sets of clothes. She handed him a t shirt and drawstring sweatpants that should still fit him okay, she had stolen them from his apartment after he'd disappeared. She had worn them nightly up until they day they'd left to find him despite the fact that his scent had long since faded. His eyebrow raised a bit and she shrugged. "They were more comfortable than mine," she lied before turning to go into her bathroom.
When she exited a few minutes later Alec was changed but he was still standing uncertainly by her bed. She slid into the left side before reaching over to where he stood on the right and gently grabbing his hand and pulling him down next to her. He came willingly and once he was beneath the blankets and at her side she slowly maneuvered herself so she was lying on her side against him, her right arm draped across his chest and her head nuzzled in the crook of his neck.
He was tense against her but he didn't try to move so she stayed where she was, keeping her embrace light so that he didn't feel trapped. So slowly she almost didn't notice his muscles relaxed, one by one until he sank into the mattress. Tears sprung to her eyes when his arms encircled her and suddenly, as though he couldn't control himself, he was holding her tightly to him. She hugged him back just as tightly and let him take as much comfort as he could in the embrace of another person for the first time in nearly a year and a half.
When Max woke up the next morning, after an unusually long, deep sleep, Alec was still still passed out beside her. His chest rose with deep, steady breaths and she watched him for a long moment afraid that she was going to wake up and he'd be gone.
When her fear of staring him into alertness became stronger than her fear of him fading away she carefully slipped out of his embrace and out of the bed. She entered her kitchen and grabbed some bread, popping it into the oven to toast. She had thought about it a lot on the long, tense, quiet helicopter ride home and she figured it'd be best to try Alec on bland foods until he got used to processed foods again.
While she was waiting for it to toast something caught her eye and she realized that someone must have dropped their bag from the chopper off sometime after they'd gone to bed. She walked over and picked it up, unzipping and unpacking it.
She pulled out Alec's bundled jacket and hesitated for a moment before unrolling it and looking at the figures he'd painstakingly carved and had meant enough to him for him to bring them home. She picked the octopus up and studied the intricate detailing on it's tentacles before moving on to the penguins.
Each of them were different in some way, as though they had personality. She was studying one in particular, it's head was cocked to the side a bit and it held a fish in it's bill. "That's Max," a voice, broken from disuse, said from behind her and Max froze, eyes widening in shock. Slowly, penguin still in hand, she turned to face him.
"Huh?" was the most intelligent thing she could think to say.
"The penguin," he said, nodding to her hand, "She was named Max."
"You named one after me?" she whispered breathlessly.
Alec shifted, his eyes darting anywhere but at her. "I named them after all of you," he said quietly. "Max was greedy and bossy and one of the sweetest...especially when given food," he told her with a shadow of his former smirk gracing his lips for just a moment.
Max didn't know what to say. Her previous thought from days earlier, when he'd taken a moment to say goodbye to the penguins...to his penguins, came flooding back to her. They'd become his friends when he'd been separated from the real versions. "Is something burning?" he asked suddenly. Max snapped back to the moment and rushed to the oven to remove the now blackened pieces of toast.
"Shit," she said. "Something tells me this isn't more appetizing than your island food," she muttered as she wrinkled her nose up in distaste.
Alec came closer to her, still keeping a bit of distance though, she noted. "I dunno," he said with a minute shrug. "My first meal on the island was mouse and raw albatross egg," he was blasé about it but she heard a hint of something deeper in his tone. "Burnt toast would have been a five star course at that moment."
"That sounds disgusting," she replied with a grimace.
Alec looked away and gave another barely there shrug. "I hadn't eaten for a week. I would have had just about anything," his voice was distant and she winced at her tactlessness.
"I'm sorry," she said immediately. "I didn't mean-"
"I know," he cut her off as he shuffled back to the window he'd posted up at last night.
"Alec?" she asked softly.
"I'm not ready for people," he told her honestly. She nodded, she hadn't planned to let anyone near him until he was better settled.
"I wasn't planning on going anywhere but...do you want me to go out for awhile too?" she asked hesitantly.
"You aren't people," he replied and she winced as she tried not to let that sting. He looked at her then, his bright hazel eyes serious as he caught hers. "You're Max," he finished as though that explained everything. Maybe it did.
~DA~
It was difficult, hearing about how life had moved on in his absence. He found himself relieved that his Russian trip hadn't been for nothing, that his isolation and Joon's death hadn't been for nothing. He wasn't surprised that Max had been elected to continue leading their people in the dawning of a new age.
Cindy working with the cops was a surprise and if he'd thought himself capable he would have laughed at the thought of it. He remembered Sketchy snapping pictures during their trip from his trailer to the shore of his island and he wondered if it was all just for an article in The Seattle Times.
Asha and Logan. Marriage wasn't too surprising, they had been dating for several months before Alec's crash. Max's genuine happiness for them was a little shocking. He remembered that she had handled the news of their dating with a stoic silence but Alec had felt the hurt bubbling beneath the surface.
When she'd asked if he were hungry his stomach turned at the thought of food. He remembered long days and longer nights dreaming of pizza and burgers. Tacos and pork rinds. Anything but mouse, albatross, fish or crab. His body wasn't used to all the processed crap anymore though and so the granola bars and chips and donuts that they'd supplied during the long flight back to Seattle had been nauseating and it had been all Alec could do to not throw it back up.
He shook his head and involuntarily found his eyes flickering towards her bedroom. The thought of a bed, a real bed was surreal. When they were standing next to it and she was handing him some sweats to change into, his sweats if he remembered correctly, the world started to tunnel again. He didn't remember getting himself changed, all he remembered was staring at the big, blanket and pillow covered bed. He was used to his cot, just a little softer than the floor. He was used to his threadbare blanket that didn't really help keep him warm. He was used to laying flat on the bare pad, his flat pillow useless until he'd finally shredded it in a rage fueled moment. After that he occasionally went without his blanket and balled that up beneath his head instead.
He barely even registered Max coming back out of the bathroom and crawling into bed, he startled to awareness when her hand grabbed his and she gently pulled him down next to her before snuggling up to him. Every muscle tensed and he felt her tense alongside him. She wasn't breathing as she waited to see what he'd do. She had touched him several times over the last two days. Touching his hand, his face, a gentle presence constantly at his side. None of that had been like this though. Touching from head to toe, another warm, human body next to him.
Tears burned at his eyes and he was glad she wasn't looking up at him as he slowly forced himself to relax. When he succeeded and he could feel himself sinking deeper into the mattress, could feel her surrounding him he couldn't control his reaction as his arms came up and pressed her closer to him, craving the contact. She didn't protest and instead hugged him back just as fiercely and he was reminded that she knew a little something about what it was like to be denied touch.
She drifted off to sleep before him even though he was dead tired. Sirens rang out in the distance. Cars honking and the air brakes of large trucks hissing through the night air. It was all so foreign and yet strangely familiar. If he had been alone, in his apartment, he wouldn't have slept at all that night but as he breathed, Max's scent surrounding him and her embrace strong even in her sleep he found himself slowly drifting off.
He awoke alone. Panic seized his chest at the thought that it had all been a dream. An incredibly realistic, painfully hopeful dream. He breathed in deep to try and calm himself and that's when he smelled her. Surrounded by her. He looked around and saw that he was, indeed, in an actual apartment. The kind that his island definitely didn't have. He heard creaking from the other room and automatically translated the noise into footsteps.
He rolled out of her bed and walked silently to the doorway. He paused as he caught sight of her. She was standing over his jacket with one of his carvings in her hand. She set it down and picked up another. He watched as she paused, tilting her head a bit as she studied it intently. He narrowed his eyes in on it and when he saw that it was his carving of her penguin counterpart that had so keenly caught her attention his heart jumped and he suddenly, for the first time in forever, found himself wanting to say something.
So he did. She had frozen and then whirled to face him, shock and hope painted plainly on her face but he caught a flash of guilt at the realization that she'd been caught snooping. Almost immediately it transformed into confusion as she processed his words. So he told her, just a little bit, about Max the penguin. He didn't mention that she'd saved his life. Or that she and the others shared their fish with him.
Something was burning, his nose twitched and he found the question tumbling from his lips. Max had been patient with him even though he could feel her frustration and concern at his silence over the last couple days. He watched as she rushed into the kitchen, pulling the burnt toast from the oven, self depreciating as she compared it to his island food.
He found himself thinking about the day after he'd arrived on the island and his desperate search for something to eat and some way to eat it. The words, almost a joke, came pouring out of his mouth. He knew that she didn't mean anything by it when she called it disgusting and honestly, it had been disgusting. The worst meal he'd had his entire stay but...he'd done it to survive and he had survived and the defensiveness rose up inside him even though he didn't mean for it to.
"I'm sorry," she immediately said, guilt heavy in her tone and her eyes were wide as she tried to backpedal. "I didn't mean-"
"I know," he cut her off as he shuffled over to her living room window. He did know. It wasn't her fault that she couldn't understand, he was glad that she couldn't understand. That she hadn't had to live that solitary nightmare. There was a small, selfish part of him though that wished she could understand so that he wouldn't have to still feel so incredibly alone.
He realized then that people would be wanting to see him. Joshua had made reference to all the people who had missed him, who was excited for his return, during the flight back. If he felt overwhelmed just being around Max who had noticeably and patiently gone out of her way to make sure he didn't feel pressured, to make him comfortable how was he going to handle being around the others, those who were more excited and less intuitive. He didn't think he could fake it yet.
So he told her that he didn't want to see people and she had offered to leave too. He didn't want to be alone with himself though. He'd rather be alone with her so he told her she wasn't people, hurt had flashed through his eyes before he elaborated. She was Max. He didn't know if it made sense but she seemed to get it because her eyes softened and she looked slightly flattered. She nodded, giving him a small but warm smile and turned around to place some more bread into the oven.
~DA~
The days had turned into a week and it was getting more and more difficult for Max to keep the adoring masses at bay. Alec still hadn't come out of her apartment, he still rarely talked and when he did he kept the conversation directed towards what had happened in his absence. His time on the island was rarely mentioned, especially after her insensitive remark that first morning. He was reclusive and she didn't know how to bring him out of it.
They were sitting quietly in her living room. Max was pouring over reports that she'd been neglecting the last couple weeks and Alec was watching tv. She peered over at him and decided that staring at the tv was probably more accurate.
Her front door opened suddenly and both transgenics tensed. Max was about ready to go apeshit on whoever decided that it was okay to just barge in after her very strict orders to leave Alec alone for the time being when her eyes caught sight of Original Cindy. Max's brows rose in surprise. Her boo hadn't been happy that she hadn't been able to see her friend yet but she'd seemed pretty understanding especially once she'd talked to Sketchy and heard about what he'd been like when they'd found him.
"Cindy," Max started, her tone reproving, but a flicker of movement had herself cutting herself off. Alec had levered himself off of the couch at the intrusion and Max was almost certain that he was going to retreat into the bedroom but he didn't. Instead his eyes were locked on something in Cindy's hands.
Cindy noticed too and she looked directly at Alec as she spoke in an uncharacteristically soft tone. "Sketchy showed me some pictures he took of your island, boo," she said. "Original Cindy found herself thinking you might like a shave," she told him, holding the shaving kit she held in her hand in offering.
Max mentally facepalmed at not having thought of that sooner. Shaving, looking more like himself as he had before the island might help him start to adjust. He could use a haircut too.
Alec moved forward, silent and graceful and nearly inhuman- well more so than they were usually- and gently grabbed the kit from Cindy. "Thanks," he murmured quietly before turning and walking into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.
Max watched him go before turning back to her friend and meeting her sad eyes. "Sorry to barge in, boo. Wigga just had the pictures developed last night and you weren't answering yo' phone," she said apologetically.
Max shook her head. "I can't believe I didn't already get one for him. I hadn't thought...it's just been so…"
Cindy put her hand on her shoulder. "I gotchu boo," she told her kindly. "Want me to go?" she asked, jabbing a thumb over her shoulder towards the door.
Max hesitated. Alec hadn't seemed upset by Cindy's intrusion and whether that was because of the shaving kit or not she couldn't be sure. "No, stay. For now, anyway. Just...don't take it personally if I kick you out later," she told her with a strained smile.
"No worries," her friend answered easily with a grin. They sat on the couch and talked for a bit, Max didn't talk about the last week, Alec would easily be able to overhear anything they said and she didn't want him to feel her strain.
A while later the bathroom door opened and Alec walked out, clean shaven and looking more like him for the first time in god only knew how long. Max felt shame burning in her again for overlooking his need to groom himself. He hadn't asked but he shouldn't have had too.
"Lookin' fine as ever, baby boo," Cindy whistled in appreciation. Alec's lips twitched like he wanted to smile but it never quite manifested. Max felt the slight slump from her friend at the lack of reaction but Cindy recovered quickly. "Want me to trim that hair while I'm here?" she asked him with another smile.
Alec hesitated for a moment. "Okay," he agreed before grabbing a chair and spinning it around so the back was against his chest. Cindy got to her feet and pulled some supplies out of her purse as she walked over to Alec. His hair was still damp from the shower he'd taken a bit before Cindy's abrupt arrival.
Cindy worked methodically, chattering about anything lighthearted that popped into her mind. She told Alec about her job working with the police and how they were all a bigger bunch of morons than Sketchy. Alec had snorted a bit at that and Max had seen Cindy's lips turn up in a large smile. Max had never loved her friend more than in that moment.
"Got myself a new lickity chick. You'll have to check her out for me sometime, hot boy. You always was the best wingman," she was saying when Max tuned back in.
"Sounds like you got along just fine without me," he replied and his tone was teasing but Max could hear the undercurrent of strain and judging by her friend's response she did too.
"Pfft, Sketchy was running around trying to be my wingman and tha' foo's strategy seemed to jus' be to scare 'em into Original Cindy's ever loving arms," she said with a cluck of her tongue as she trimmed his hair. "You know OC don't go for the damsels," she muttered with a shake of her head.
"Oh, I dunno, Cindy. Damsel's can be awfully grateful," he told her and she paused for a moment while Max straightened up. He had sounded...almost wicked. The words were quieter than they would have been two years ago but he sounded like Alec.
"True dat, boo," Cindy agreed with a chuckle. "All done," she proclaimed as she stood back to examine her handiwork. She'd cut off quite a few inches and his hair was now a lot closer to the cut he'd had when he first was released from Manticore, just a little more length now than he'd had then.
He got up and checked himself out in the mirror really quick. He nodded and Max noticed the relief in his eyes. "Thank you Cindy," he said sincerely.
"Anytime, hot boy," she replied easily, her arm came up and gently squeezed his arm. "Original Cindy's gotta jet," she announced as she packed up her tools. Alec went to bring the shaving kit back out but Cindy shook her head. "That's yours, baby," she told him. "Welcome home," and she said it so sincerely that Alec looked slightly shocked.
Original Cindy bid goodbye to Max and left them to themselves. Max looked at Alec, looking so much like he had the last time she'd seen him before his Russia trip that for one brief moment she was almost able to convince herself that the last year and a half had been a really bad dream.
Mole still loved his alcohol. His cigars too. He still got on with Gem and Dalton and had even warmed up to the sticky little tot.
He still got along with Max, finally admitting that he actually kind of liked her. Not that he'd ever admit that out loud.
He decided that he may have been exaggerating just the tiniest bit when he had claimed to hate Alec. It had taken a frustratingly long time but after a few weeks of being holed up in Max's apartment Alec had finally come out.
Mole had watched him closely, watched the masses trying not to bombard him too. He hadn't seen the kid since the air field, Max had kept him to herself but Mole wasn't stupid. He knew that Alec wasn't in any shape for his adoring masses.
By the time Alec had finished making the rounds he'd looked exhausted but the citizens of Terminal City looked in better spirits than they had since their freedom was announced. Maybe even longer because even that day had been tinged with sadness. Alec was walking away and he could tell that he was looking for some peace and quiet.
"You look like shit," Mole yelled out gruffly from where he stood, leaning against the door of his apartment building.
Alec's lips twitched as he glanced at him. "Still prettier than you, Scales," he shot back and Mole almost toppled over at how much he sounded like himself...hell he almost choked on his cigar when he'd heard him talking to one of the X5's just a bit earlier. Max had said he still wasn't really talking but now he was thinking maybe she meant about anything important.
"Drink?" he offered.
Alec hesitated for a moment. "Sure," he finally agreed as he stepped over the threshold.
Mole poured him a drink once they got to his place. Alec took a pull from it and nearly groaned in pleasure. "Been awhile?" Mole asked with a smirk.
Alec shrugged. "Choices on my island were limited to water or water," he joked.
Mole's smirk faltered for a moment before he slapped it back in place. Last thing the kid needed was pity. "Yeah well, didn't look like you tried very hard to widen your options," he grunted.
Alec's lips twitched again. "Somehow building a still never crossed my mind," he said, referencing the first words Mole had spoken to him after they'd found him...or rather, he'd found them.
"Not like you had anything else to worry about," Mole said with a casual shrug. Alec just nodded and took another drink. Mole knew they had a long way to go before the other man was firing on all cylinders again but he was patching himself up the best he could and Mole was proud to call him his friend.
Joshua looked around his warehouse. He had a wall...a long wall, that held his paintings from the time Alec was gone. Twenty One. One for every week of those first two months and another thirteen for every month after that. Many of them were little more than black canvas with the occasional swirl of color for when Joshua had been feeling particularly hopeful.
There was the painting from when they found out he might be alive, he'd painted it while they waited for the helicopter ship to get into place. There was a large circle of black in the center slowly changing to slightly lighter hues. Navy blue, royal blue, deep purple, brick red, swirling out to sky blue, light purple and the dark pink hues of hope.
Then there were the paintings that represented every month since Alec had been back. There were five on the wall and each of them were just a little bit lighter a little bit more hopeful. Joshua moved to the wall and placed the sixth canvas onto it's corresponding nail. He stepped back and looked it over carefully before walking over to a different wall, the one where he kept his portraits. He pulled Alec off the wall and held it up to Return from Island #6. They were similar. Return from Island #6 was still a little darker both in the center and in the colorful tendrils that swirled out towards the edges of the canvas.
Return from Island #6 was much closer to Alec than Return from Island #5 and light years closer than Return from Island #1. Joshua grinned widely.
Alec stared blankly at the paper in front of him. The front page byline read Theodore Calvin and right there staring him boldly in the face were the pictures of his island. Words that told his story. It was well written, he'd give his old buddy that. It was his story but it was told from the perspective of his friends.
"I'll be honest," the quote was from Logan. "I wasn't as sure as Max was that he survived the initial crash. Alec has always had this knack for survival though so I still checked even months...even after a year and more had passed. Alec proved me wrong. He does that a lot."
"Look. I knew that he had to have survived because he still owed me a box of cigars after losing one of our poker games. If the kid had died I would have had to kill him myself. It's prison rules, you know? You pay up or you just pay." Alec had outright laughed at Mole's words.
"Alec alive. Alec survives, nine lives. Like cat. Joshua knew that Alec still had cat lives to use."
"I wanted to believe that he was alive but...it just took so long and a lot of us lost hope. I shouldn't have doubted him though 'cause Alec's like the toughest, coolest guy I've ever known, you know? I tried to fill his shoes after he left but...they were too big," Dalton.
"Original Cindy may have had a little doubt, fo' sho'. Alec did what he does best and put us all in our place though and Cindy won't be making that mistake again. Max though, my girl always knew that he was out there somewhere and that she just had to find him.
"This reporter, as you know if you've been reading my articles for the last couple years, is a good buddy of Alec McDowell. It was a privilege to be one of the few to be there when we found him. It was an honor to see the life he forged for himself, the hardships he endured and survived. That's what he does best, my friend. He survives. There aren't words- and I would know- to describe how I feel, how we all feel, that we can give this story a happy ending."
"I always knew. Somehow, deep down inside me I always knew that he was alive. It was just instinct." Max's words. "I never gave up, we never gave up and it took us a long time...too long, but we got him home. He's home and that's all that matters."
"It's...good to be home," it was all Alec could contribute.
Sketchy hadn't put up and pictures of him except one where his back was to the camera and he had his group of penguins surrounding him. There were photos of his trailer, of his markings on the wall. His shelf of carvings. The outhouse he'd worked long and hard to build. There were pictures of his waterfall and pool. Of the many albatross that constantly flew overhead. Of his penguins. Even now, after six months of being back and nothing more than slightly grainy black and white pictures to go off of he could easily tell them apart.
He noted that Sketch had kept the name of the island he'd been on out of the paper. Maybe to discourage unwanted, curious tourists. Maybe because he didn't remember the name. Alec didn't really care why, he just was glad he had.
He still felt that encroaching loneliness sometimes. It was hard having no one to talk to who would understand. He refused to give any details into his time on the island. They wouldn't understand and they worried enough as it was. They didn't need to know how close he'd come to ending it.
The most surprising thing, the thing that caught him off guard the most was the fact that sometimes he missed the island. He missed his penguins. He thought the feeling would go away after he'd readjusted to normal life but if anything they'd heightened. He felt like a piece of him had been left behind there. He felt like the only place where he really made sense anymore was that damned island. Don't get him wrong, he doesn't want to go back to the loneliness there. He just...he craved the simplicity of it.
Alec sighed and stared down at the pictures of his penguins. He'd have to ask Sketchy for the original copies. Maybe they'd be in color.
Logan had asked if she was sure and her answer had been a resounding no. Of course she wasn't sure, she had no idea how her idea would be received. It had been eight months since Alec returned. He'd been back for half the amount of time he'd been gone and he'd done a great job of faking it but he wasn't alright.
She could feel it in waves coming off of him, the loneliness. He tried, he really did. She knew he did. He refused to talk about his time on the island outside of tidbits here and there. He knew what she knew. She'd never really be able to understand. None of them would. They hadn't lived it.
She took a deep breath before turning to face him. They were in bed, they weren't like that. Not that Max opposed to a relationship with him, she craved one actually. But he wasn't ready for anything more than her companionship and she accepted that as gracefully as she could. She knew that he knew she wanted more but neither of them ever spoke about it. It was just another thing added to the list of things they didn't talk about.
"Alec?" she asked hesitantly.
"Hmm?" he hummed in reply as he flipped the page of the book he was reading.
"I have something I was thinking we could do together...we don't have to if you don't want to. I got it all set up but...well it'd be easy to cancel, I made sure of it…" she rambled.
"Max," he said, cutting her off. "Spit it out."
"I asked Logan to get in touch with his contacts, the ones who helped us get you off of Gough Island. There is a ship on it's way back to where it set anchor when we got you. There's also a chopper in place to fly us there. If you want to go back, only if you want to, then we're set to leave tomorrow afternoon to meet the ship when it gets there. We'd stay for a month. Just you and me. You could, I dunno, show me around. Introduce me to your penguins. Maybe I could understand a little better. Maybe you could talk to me finally…" she was rambling again.
She risked a look at Alec and he looked shell shocked. She immediately cursed herself but before she could get around to trying to figure out how to take it all back he surged towards her, his book forgotten, as his lips captured hers. He broke it off as quickly as he'd started it and rested his forehead against hers. "I'd really like that," he replied and she saw a glimmer of something in his eyes. Gratitude maybe, or relief.
She smiled widely at him. "Get some sleep then pretty boy, We leave the airfield at noon...and we need to pack first."
Alec smirked. "You don't want to wear the same outfit for the next month?" he asked.
She paused. How much of his life there did he want her to experience, really? "Do you want me to?" she asked curiously.
He laughed. "Go to sleep, Max. We'll pack in the morning," he told her with an amused shake of his head.
They'd been on his island for two weeks. Max kind of didn't want to leave after the next two weeks were up. She hadn't seen Alec so animated since before his crash. In the dark of the night he would whisper about the dark thoughts he'd had at his worst times. Her heart broke for him while she simultaneously was again reminded of how strong he was.
He'd introduced her to his penguins. They flocked to him as though they had missed him. Alec told her that they had just missed his fish but she didn't entirely believe that. They were more wary around her, even after two weeks. Alec had just shrugged and told her that it had taken months for them to warm up to him. He told her about them sharing their fish as though they were attempting to cheer him up during one of his spells of depression.
She fell in love with them. He loved them and they had saved him. She could see why he'd had a hard time leaving them. They swam in his little lake and showered in his waterfall. It was difficult adjusting to the dreary, rain filled weather even though she was from Seattle but she immediately noticed that Alec barely even noticed it.
She wasn't nearly as graceful and silent as him and she just watched him in amazement as he noiselessly stalked his prey. He showed her how to cook up albatross and fish, crab and lobster. He took her to the rocky shore and pointed out the octopus when they came around, enraptured by them and she felt herself falling for him even harder.
Their first night he had asked her what she wanted for dinner and she'd looked him right in the eye. "Mouse and raw albatross egg," she'd replied. He'd looked stunned and then laughed before shrugging and setting out to supply if for her.
It had been disgusting just as she'd thought. She hadn't been starving for a week prior to eating it so it wasn't quite the same but she could tell that Alec appreciated the gesture. He'd given her a perfectly cooked piece of fish to wash it down with.
They stayed in his trailer at night. They'd brought better bedding that they'd had dropped down by helicopter before landing on the ship and though it was a tight squeeze they managed to make themselves somewhat comfortable on the little cot. She didn't need nearly as much sleep as him and late at night as he slept beside her she would lay awake, staring at the ceiling. Imaging herself there all by herself as the months ticked on. She could feel the choking loneliness just imagining it. She'd look over at Alec in awe realizing again how hard it would have been to keep going in the face of the prospect of living out the rest of his days alone and trapped on the island.
She learned how to fish, they had retrieved his crab pot and he'd taught her how to bait it. He took her on runs around the island and it wasn't long before she'd had it all mapped out. Before their trip there she'd only seen the whole thing from the chopper having not really strayed from the eastern and southern sides of the island during the rescue mission.
When she was itching for activity that wasn't running he'd looked at her knowingly and dared her to follow him as he dove off of a cliff and swam gracefully through the water. Never one to back down, she followed and they swam. He'd tell her about how he did that everyday for weeks in an attempt to find another plot of land. He never would have found anything, not that was occupied anyway. He was thousands of miles from the nearest land mass that had humans on it.
At night they'd lay on the shore or in the plateau or sometimes up on one of the tallest rocks and watch the stars. They'd never been so bright and there had never been so many. "This is one of the things I've missed the most," he'd told her.
When their month was up and their bags were packed, the crab pot returned to the trailer rather than thrown into the forest, the made their way to the eastern shore. His penguins still didn't come up to her but they tolerated her presence while they flocked to Alec and shared food. His goodbye tradition. Max found herself reluctant to leave.
She had called Mole on their satellite phone and let him know they'd be home in a few days and it had been harder than she'd expected to force the words out. There was something about the island. Especially, she mused, when you weren't alone that made it hard to leave.
Alec didn't say anything but she knew he felt it too. He smiled at her though as they made their way back to the ship. There was a light in his eyes that she hadn't even realized had been missing before their trip.
Days later they were back home and exhausted but as Max looked around their apartment it didn't feel quite like home anymore. Alec hadn't kissed her since the night she'd told him about the trip and she hadn't pushed for anything. If there was one thing the whole ordeal had taught her it was patience.
When the bedroom door closed behind her he turned suddenly and pushed her against it, kissing her soundly and he knees nearly buckled as passion consumed them. When he pulled away he had a real, genuine grin on his face. "Thank you, Max," he said.
"Thank you, Alec," she replied, thanking him for letting her into his world, for confiding in her and letting her know the darkest parts of him as well as for showing her that there were good moments too.
He kissed her again and she got the impression he knew why she was thanking him. He moved them to the bed and finally, finally he let her show him just how much she loved him and he returned the favor.
Max and Alec looked over the newly developed photos from their trip. "We'll go back again," she murmured as she smiled looking at one she'd taken of him, his indignant face watching as Mole the penguin ran off with the piece of fish he'd stolen.
Alec smiled at her words and she found herself thinking that maybe, one day, once their transition into the human world was complete and they were accepted wholly (or as wholly as any group of people could be accepted) maybe they could move to Alec's little island. Set up a home there, a life. Maybe just a summer home she decided. She'd miss her friends and being pampered too much to fully commit to island life.
"I'll hold you to that," he replied softly as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
-End