Turns out the Betrothed AU (I'm naming it, My Knight in Demon Armor) is still underdeveloped, long stories are so difficult for me T_T. Meh, I won't stress too much about it. I'll just get that published whenever I can. At least I got this for now, less plot and more angst.

I'm experimenting with my writing style so this is how I used to write before I wrote Astelle fics, it's more narrative than dialogue based. Let me know if it's any better. I just feel that this style is more immersive but character interactions are less noticeable. Also I wanted to explore another side of Asta because I usully focus on philia (friendship love) developing to romantic. Since he's dense, I imagine that he's pretty innocent so why not give him a little shock with lust? Lols.

Warning for intimate content, I borderline wonder if this should be M rated but nothing goes beyond making out so I don't think it is. If it gets deleted or anything, I'll just publish this separately from my other fics.

Asta was a pretty simple guy withtwo main goals in mind: (1)become the Wizard Kingand (2)marry Sister Lily. But once he and Noelle unintentionally kiss, he became borderline obsessed with another goal. Now he wants to reexperience what was meant to be an accident.

Asta was by no means a stranger to desire. He has desired many things throughout his life.This was his motivation which rewarded him unlimited potential, beloved companions, and significant achievements. It seemed however, that not all of his wants were as clear cut as he would've liked. His latest desire had him questioning if he even truly knew himself because what he wanted was definitely forbidden. After all, he shouldn't desire to kiss a friend. A friend he knew possessed only platonic feelings for him. Noelle had been a comrade of his for years yet this longing has only recently sprouted. Never did he think he was capable of such want, much less when he already committed himself to another woman. This started due to a mishap while attempting to save her. If only he hadn't caught her—no. Helping her couldn't be a mistake, he would never forgive himself if he let her get hurt.

The two had gone on a mission to find rogue mages suspected of human trafficking. One of which had the ability to make their victims fall asleep. When they inspected the suspicious building, the duo caught the mages on the act. They both rushed to take the victims away and their opponents released a gaseous spell as defense. Thankfully, spells like that are unable to affect him but the same could not be said about his partner. Midair, the watermage abruptly detransformed and plummitted to the ground. On instinct he cushioned her fall using his body. That was fine, the weight and impact didn't bother him at all. Still, did her lips have to fall on his?

He witnessed the expression on her face as she landed, the same moment she went unconscious. Half lidded eyes, a slight open mouth, eyebrows free from any sign of tension. It was so serene, beautiful—angelic even, that the sight made his heart skip a beat. It took a few seconds for his mind to register their position and the tingly sensation on his lips. The moment he regained himself he pushed her off of him, ignoring the flush on his cheeks.That was his first kiss and most likely hers as well, Asta was guilty that he took that away from her. What's worse is that she wasn't even awake for it. However that was hardly the right time to think about such things. With his distractions aside, Asta brings out Demon Destroyer and the gaseous spell's effects are no more. Noelle woke up as intended and together they take down the criminals. After the culprits were imprisoned, the captives released, and the reports written, the duo's mission was officially done.

When they were no longer in imminent danger, the antimage was forced to deal with the aftermath alone. That of which was more troubling to him than their sustained injuries. He was conflicted. Is he supposed to tell her what happened—maybe. Would she be mad—obviously yes. Was there even a point in telling her—none if that would only end with her upset and himself drenched. After a few back and forth thoughts, he decided to keep the accident to himself. Thus, she continued to be blissfully unaware while he attempted to forget it completely. Simply pretend it never happened. That was what he had in mind, unfortunately his subconscious begged to differ.

As if a persistent voice was ordering him to, Asta's thoughts started to center on the young Silva. Truth be told, he built this habit when they trained in the Heart Kingdom; maybe even before. One can't exactly comment on 'the softness of her skin', unless they payed close attention. In his defense Noelle was hard to ignore, especially with her ki. He could detect her distinct flow of energy whenever she was with him. An aura that was comfy, stable, warm and only he could elicit. This was her trust in him. Perceiving it caused him unexplained feelings of happiness and relief. However, this was replaced with a new set of feelings ever since that mission. Unlike the fulfillment he gets from her ki, the accident left him incredibly unsatisfied. The brief contact of their lips wasn't enough for him, Asta craved to feel more. Everyday he contemplated on the suppleness of her lips, how it would stretch and pull in between his teeth, the soft buzz it makes when she moans against him as he kisses her even deeper. These kinds of thoughts were oddly riddled with lust and he was terrified.

As a result, he could no longer trust himself when Noelle was around. Even being fully aware, he was incapable of stoping himself from deliberately watching her lips. It was a healthy shade of pink, appealingly plump, and normally moist. No doubt the image was practically ingrained in his mind. He could barely control himself! The worse instance was when she wore lipgloss— courtesy of Vanessa, he even caught the faint scent of fruit and it evoked his hunger. The make up no doubt made her very enticing, her mouth might as well be his candy-coated temptations. Asta wanted—needed to know how it tasted. The urge to find out was so strong he had to literally run away before he devoured her unassuming lips. Very soon, he avoided her altogether, even abruptly stopping conversations just to get away from her. This happened so often that she attempted to question his behavior which he either ignored or evaded. Unfortunately that was his only solution, but even Asta knew it was impossible to keep up. Furthermore, his mind didn't even give him the opportunity to solve that first problem before giving him a second.

One day he woke up tied to a chair with his arms—the same as his feet, bound behind him. Even with his strength he couldn't break the ropes. Panicked, he looks around and finds Noelle glaring at him with her arms crossed in front of her.

"I know you've been avoiding me." He shudders in fear.

She sounded mad, angry, infuriated! Clearly his antics pushed her to force this confrontation. He felt himself sweat and he closed his eyes when she approached him. The male tried to think of a way to possibly get out of this but her menacing aura made it clear that escaping was futile. Perhaps he could talk his way out? Unfortunately he was incapable of lying and doing so would increase the guilt he already harbored. There was no evading this. After gathering all his courage, the antimage spoke.

"I can explain." He leaned against the back of the chair as much as he could. With eyes still closed, he felt a weight on his lap. In confusion, he peaked with one eye and the first thing he saw was her triumphant smirk.

"Think you can ignore me now?" For the first time in his life, Asta stuttered to reply.

"N—noelle, what are you do—doing?" He was frozen in place not that he had much room to begin with. Regardless, he was afraid to make the slightest movement with her sitting on him. The woman ignored his question in favor of devoting gentle touches all over his body. Her feminine hands slowly roamed accross his face, descended to his neck, around his shoulders, and throughout his abdomen. The sensation of each finger softly pressed against his skin leaves him breathless. His silence must've satisfied her because she takes the opportunity to whisper in his ear. The slight breeze she made as she spoke caused goosebumps.

"I know what you want."

Ba-dump.

"But you won't get it if you keep avoiding me." She pouted. Her arms wrapped around him and she brought herself closer.

Ba-dump.

"Idiot, there is no need to stop yourself." Her hands reached behind and fiddled with his bindings. With their noses touching, the distance between them significantly diminished and their eyes locked in a heated gaze.

Ba-dump.

Moments passed, the antimage felt his restraints loosen and she said. "Go ahead, obtain your desire."

He struggled to regain rational thought, but he was sure that eveything she had just done was beyond the bounds of normalcy. Noelle was a reserved girl, she was unlikely to do any of this, much less with him of all people. As soon as he regained his ability to move, he gripped both of her shoulders and succesfully pushes the woman off his lap. The imposter yelps and he stood towering over. With his sword already in hand he aimed it to her neck.

"Who are you?" She scoffed at his question, not at all concerned about the weapon looming her.

"I am who you think I am, or more accurately how you want me to be." Her vague answer did very little to clear his understanding.

"I don't get it." He muttered. And in a flash she disappeared. A kick pushed him forward and he turns around, the sword posed to attack. The woman before him giggles and he didn't understand. One second she was on the ground and the next she was right behind him, sitting at the chair he previously occupied. It was hard to believe that she teleported during that miniscule second and he didn't perceive magic of any sort. And even if he didn't sense anything, his antimagic sword would've automatically gravitated towards it.

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

She clicks her tongue.The impersonator sit cross-legged and had their cheek resting on the palm of her hand."How disappointing but whatever. Let's see how long you last." Her fingers snapped.

He woke up drenched in sweat, his heartbeat rang in his ears and it took a while to catch his breath. Asta realized he was safely in his room and on his bed, the sheets a tangled mess between his legs. It seemed as though he had just woken up from a nightmare. Now that he thought about it, he saw nothing beyond himself, a chair and Noelle. The ability of said woman to transport without using magic was also unexplained. And since when could he perceive himself in third person yet feel the exact sensations as if he was in first person? Once he analyzed everything he came to a conclusion: that was all fabricated from his mind. A dream. Perhaps to compensate for what was deprived of him in the real world, his subconscious offered it in his sleep. He hoped that was a one time occurrence unfortunately luck was not on his side.

Due to the insistent attempts for intimacy in his dreams despite his repeated refusals, the antimage went to Finral for guidance. He told him about the persistent seductress, and everything she had done or said—sans her identity. Asta thought the older male would be shocked, worried, or even appalled by what he told. Unexpectedly Finral burst in glee and even congratulated him. Apparently the experience entailed a transition in his coming of age, that it was completely normal for him to dream events of such nature. The spatial mage told him that plenty of people have gone through the same thing and there was no need to be embarrassed or ashamed about it—in fact he should enjoy it. Furthermore it would be difficult to stop himself from dreaming anyways. One cannot control their subconscious.

"So do what you want, it's just a dream." Finral adds with a shrug. But as much as Asta trusted his senpai, there was no way in hell he could indulge in his temptations and have the audacity to face the real Noelle afterwards. He didn't want to avoid her for yet another reason. So out of respect for his friend, he did everything in his power not to defile her in his mind. This vow to himself proved to be difficult to uphold, especially when he failed to recognize that he was dreaming at all.

A memory replayed in his mind, the very reason why all his torment started, the accident as he called it. He remembered it well, her immediate plummit to the ground, his turn in direction to cushion her fall, the peaceful expression on her face as she landed, and the mishap itself. Obviously it wasn't the most graceful kiss in the world, what with the force of gravity against them. Not to mention, the dangerous circumstances surrounding them prevented him from truly savoring the experience. Fortunately in one's imagination, the concept of time has no need to abide by the rules neither must facts align with reality. In dreams, the will is what constitutes as truth.

Instead of her knocked out as he remembered, she remained conscious even with her eyes closed. He was surprised that the lips he had yet to separate from started moving against his. Noelle kissed him softly and kept a steady pace. Despite his initial shock, he didn't stop her. Instead the familiar tingly sensations encouraged him to reciprocate. He feels the watermage smile through the kiss he returned with vigor. Eventually they separate and she hovers over him, panting. Her hand moved to trail on his lowerlip, her index finger leaving featherly touches as she spoke.

"To think you refused me for so long, but aren't you delighted to make your desires true? Real me would've blasted you into oblivion. That's why I'm here. Dreams are mere illusions. Consequences don't apply to me—" The same hand cups his chin while she whispers.

"So do what you want, it's just a dream."

It was true that he was scared of his recent impulses. Oddly enough he was unwilling to even be honest with her about it. Perhaps it was because he didn't even know that he liked her this way. Maybe he was terrified of her reaction and the possibility of losing their friendship. And what kept him from doing any of his desires was clearly her lack of consent. He refused to use her like an object for pleasure. However, the imposter above confirmed that they are not the same person. Instead she is the personification of what he wanted, specifically made by his mind to appease him. No matter how much he denied her, subconsciously he still wanted her, therefore she would never go away.

He pushed her off him and got up, much to her disappointment. Once he stood he takes hold of her torso and threw her on his bed—without even bothering to question how it got there. Before she could move, he saddled her waist. With a strong grip, he held her hands above her head and the surprise on her face made him shudder in anticipation.

It's just a dream.

The male leaned down to reconnect their mouths, taking the lead this time. He tilted his head for a better angle and proceeds to suck on her lower lip. Using his canine, he bit and pulled on her mouth gently. The sound of her whimpers delighted his ears. Momentarily he draws back to admire her swollen lips, the woman underneath him stared back in a daze. Satisfied by the sight, he continues his ministrations. Searing kisses are left on her neck, his teeth lightly nibbling against her pulse. He sinks his teeth and feels her gasp as he no doubt left bruises. Asta returned to her lips once again, his tongue seeking to play with hers. When he found it she attempts to fight for dominance but his aggresion wins him the battle. He takes the opportunity to memorize the feeling of her mouth.

It's just a dream.

Having lost himself to dedicating the sensation to memory, he doesn't notice her legs that wrapped around his waist. With a jerk she pulls their abdomens closer and he groans from the unexpected but satisfying friction below his hips. He readjusts the grip on her wrists and replicates her previous action several times. Each repetition was no less electrifying than the last, even with both of them fully clothed. The desperation to achieve his euphoria had him tempted to fully disregard his vow and he clings to that one phrase for justification.

It's just a dream.

When he was done she attached herself to his ear. "Hey Asta~" She called out to him in a sweet manner, much like a succubus alluring its prey. He glances at her to witness her menacing smile.

"Are you no longer bothered to use me in satisfying your own sick pleasures?"

That mocking question broke his one fragile excuse and the antimage wakes up shaking and ridden with guilt. While he had been aware that she was an illusion, what he didn't know is that she was actually a collection of his contradicting thoughts. Although she was the personification of his forbidden desire, she was also the guilt he harbored along with it. For days, sleep was no longer available to him. Asta was unwilling to risk making the same mistake twice. What he did was shameful and inconsiderate, loosing his control in a dream was no excuse. He no longer had the right to call himself worthy of Noelle's friendship.

Knock. Knock. Knock

In the middle of preparing for yet another restless night, a sound interrupts his routine. Asta opens the door, expecting it to be one of the other guys but turns out it was the woman he was ashamed to face. Noelle stood in front of him and tapped her foot on the floorboards, a sharp glare settled on her eyes and her arms were crossed.

"I know you've been avoiding me." A wave of deja vu hits him from the familiar line and posture. It did very little to quell his anxiety. Part of him wanted to close that door shut. Simply pretend that she was yet another hallucination but the look in her eyes told him she wouldn't let him go so easily.

"And I honestly have no clue why but that doesn't matter right now. Are you alright? You look as though you barely had any sleep." He knows that her initial hostility was a front. The concern in her ki was enough to placate him for the time being. He almost forgot how comforting it was to have her around. It was a relief to know that even though he avoided her for so long, her trust in him never wavered.

"I haven't been sleeping at all." He admitted and she bombarded him with worried questions.

"What! Why? For how long? How come you never asked for help? Seriously, what's gotten into you?" She held his face and inspects him closely, especially the deep circles under his eyes. Her concern took him by surprise, he felt like a chick being doted by a mother hen. Asta concluded that he was selfish for troubling her so much, especially since he avoided her for seemingly no reason. He decided that the least he could do was give her an explanation.

"I've been avoiding you because I've been guilty." The Silva brushed the topic off in favor of caring for him.

"We can talk about that later, for now you need rest. I've read before that chamomile tea could help with insomnia, hold on—" He stopped her right as she turned around, his hold being a silent plea for her to listen.

"Truth is, the reason why I can't sleep peacefully is because something happened on our last mission together and I kept it from you." She sighs exasperated by his insistence on the irrelevant topic and refused to face him.

"Asta, that was months ago. In any case I was only knocked out for half a minute. Whatever happened is probably less important than your health—"

"I stole your first kiss by accident!" His revelation was finally enough for the watermage to stop in her tracks.

"When you started falling, I caught you but the way you landed on me was—I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to.

Seconds of eerie silence ensued and he was anticipating a waterblast to the face at any moment. He felt her abruptly pull her arm away.

"Seriously?" She cried, turned around and lightly smacked him on the head.

"Dork, stop feeling guilty for unnecessary things. I don't even remember it happened. If you say it's an accident then I believe you." The Silva resumes her exit but stopped just a few steps from his doorframe and adds with hesitation.

"Besides, I really don't mind having you as my first kiss." Noelle may be faced away from him but he can still detect her aura, he senses her ki resonate strongly in her chest. It was magnificently bright and the weight of his guilt lightened. After that she hastens her steps til she was out of sight even still he continued to track her. He notes that her energy fluctuated as if she was leaping in joy. It makes him think, could Noelle be glad that he stole her first kiss? The possibility of her wanting more than friendship from him was astonishing. However he couldn't get his hopes up from mere speculation. Eventually she retuned and offered him a cup of freshly brewed chamomile tea to which he thanked her for. The warmth in his hands and the aroma of soothing flowers was perfect in calming his nerves for what he was about to do.

"So about the accidental kiss..." He trailed off and took another sip to gain more courage. "Am I stupid to wish it would happen again?" He watched her violently splutter her own drink. When she recovered she looked at him with eyes shocked, cheeks flushed, and mouth agape. However, what truly answered him was the mirthful movement of her aura. The watermage wipes away the excess liquid pouring down her chin.

"No." She mustered and looked away by pouring herself a new cup.

"But if you were, then I'd be stupid to wish I remembered." He heard her mutter quietly and she continued to hide her face behind the porcelain. It was then he understood, all this time he mistook her affection for something else. The unwavering energy she felt for him was not trust but love.Turns out he had nothing to be afraid of. A chuckle escapes him from the ridiculous self inflicted suffering he went through these past months. His hand clutched hers and carefully intertwined their fingers, thankfully she hadn't flung him away.

"I can remind you as many times as you want, just say when." She flinched from his tease. He took a celebratory sip of the delicious brew.

"How about now?" It was Asta's turn to choke on the liquid and she found amusement in his instant karma.

"Tea through your nose isn't very pleasant is it?" The watermage taunts and stuck her tongue out. For revenge, his first impulse was to lick it but he knew that would earn him a good slap to the face. Instead he cupped her cheeks and brought her closer to his face.

"Well? Are you gonna kiss me or not?" He asked in a low but demanding tone. All sense of teasing was gone and her embarrassment skyrocketed. Noelle could no longer avoid his direct gaze due to the hands keeping her in place. He felt her nervousness set in but she subdued it by taking a deep breath. Still her hands shook to cup his cheeks as well. Slowly she inched closer, her eyes closing the nearer she went.

Chu~

The kiss was sweet, mellow and tasted like honey—probably because of the tea. At first he felt her stay still against him but soon moved when she gained enough courage. Her hands went around his neck and he follows her lead by placing his on her waist. They pull and their bodies were flushed against each other. After a few more seconds of lip locking they separated for air. The two hug afterwards, giggling to themselves. Finally he thinks, their first real kiss. Sure it wasn't as mind boggling as their first nor as intense as his dreams but he can declare with absolute certainty, this was their best so far. What makes it even better is that this moment was of their own choosing. This kiss was no mere accident. And as for Asta's dreams that will continue to plague him—in fact they might get worse; he's pretty sure his girlfriend wouldn't mind.