24. Once More, with Feeling

Minerva had known highs before, but this was different. This was beyond that. For a couple of days she felt as though she had accomplished everything she had ever set out to do. But of course, that wasn't the least bit true.

Despite her assurances to the contrary, she had fallen a little bit behind on her scheduled revisions for the upcoming N.E.W.T.s, and then there was Quidditch. In their last two games Gryffindor had flattened Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, but so had Slytherin and now the match between the two rival houses would decide who was going to win the Cup.

It hit her again that this was it. Her last game. Her last chance.

When she mentioned that to Professor Dumbledore, he said, "There's still time to change your mind and become a professional Quidditch player after all."

Minerva was still going to his office to practise her Animagus transformation, though it was mostly out of habit rather than necessity, now that the change itself was no longer dangerous. Or perhaps it was simply because she seemed unable to stop. Or because he hadn't told her to stop.

"You know that's not what I want," she said dismissively.

"Then what do you want?" Dumbledore asked.

She thought about that. "I suppose I don't want it to end."

Dumbledore looked at her over his half-moon spectacles, and though his X-ray vision could be exhausting at times, Minerva knew she was going to miss it. "But without endings, how could there ever be new beginnings?"

Perhaps she would miss his enigmatic answers a little less. Still, Minerva laughed. "That might be the least practical advice I've ever heard," she said, "Professor."

"I see. Well, how about this?" Dumbledore leaned forward in his chair. "Make smart decisions tomorrow."

"I always make smart decisions," Minerva replied.

Dumbledore only harrumphed slightly.

After a night of fitful sleep and a quick breakfast, Minerva faced the rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team in the changing rooms. They could hear the noise from the stadium. As always, the entire school had shown up to watch the match, despite the heavy rain and stiff wind. Minerva didn't mind. That was proper Scottish weather and she knew that her team was made of sterner stuff.

"Listen, everyone, you know what to do, so let's make this one count, okay? Not just for Duncan and me, who won't get a do-over next year, but for all those Gryffindors cheering for us out there. That Cup has no business being in Slytherin. Let's show them what it means to fight like lions. Let's show them our pride."

The team cheered and got ready to walk onto the pitch.

Duncan sidled up to Minerva. "Feels like yesterday that we tried out for the team, doesn't it?" Minerva gave a non-committal nod. She was checking the direction of the wind. "Listen, I've been meaning to thank you for not kicking me off the team when you became captain."

"Thank me by catching the Snitch," Minerva replied.

"You bet," Duncan nodded. "But anyway, that was real decent of you."

"Not really. You've been a good Seeker ever since you recovered from your accident in our third year. If I had kicked you off the team for personal reasons, I could have just as well handed my badge back in to Professor Dumbledore," Minerva said. "Plus, it's been ages since we were together."

"Yeah, but when my granny read that you're an Animagus now, she called me a git for breaking up with you."

"I was the one who broke up with you," Minerva corrected him.

He frowned. "That's not how I remember it."

"Probably because you're a git."

"Funny." Duncan grimaced. "But also true. I'm working on that, though. So if you wanna hang out again some time…?"

Minerva snorted. Clearly Duncan's sense of timing had not improved one bit. "Ask me that again when we've won the game," she told him and led her team out onto the pitch one last time.

It was quite possibly the worst game of Quidditch Albus had ever seen. Not because of the weather. He had cast a powerful Impervius Charm and it kept most of the rain at bay. It also wasn't that the two teams were playing poorly. Quite the opposite. They were playing with a vengeance that had little to do with a sporting competition. Albus refused to believe that he had kept Minerva alive throughout the entire process of becoming an Animagus, simply to watch her kill herself on the Quidditch field.

Everything started with one of the Slytherin Chasers, Israr Sevazlian, who flew straight into the Gryffindor Keeper, knocking him off his broom. Sevazlian claimed that he had simply not been able to break in time, but Minerva seemed to think that he was lying because she argued about it with Madam Hooch for a good five minutes. When the game resumed, Minerva had clearly directed the Gryffindor Beaters to badger Sevazlian – and no one else – with Bludgers. In retaliation Sevazlian stole a bat from one of his own Beaters and tried to hit one of the Gryffindor Beaters over the head with it. While defending her teammate, Minerva almost jumped onto Sevazlian's broom to stop him.

Madam Hooch awarded so many penalties that they made up for half of all the points scored. The game was tied at 110 points each, which gave Albus hope that the Snitch would be spotted soon. Unfortunately, soon was not soon enough.

Minerva currently had the Quaffle and she was racing towards the Slytherin goalposts. Sevazlian dived to head her off. He was on a clear collision course. Minerva saw him, but she refused to stop. Sevazlian crashed into her with a sickening crunch. Somehow Minerva got the Quaffle off to score, and then she was falling.

Albus had his wand ready, but before he could speak an incantation, loud gasps and shouts of surprise rose from the stands of the stadium. Minerva had changed in mid-air to become the small Tabby cat he had grown familiar with. His wand still in his hand, Albus hesitated. Cats were known for their nearly infallible righting reflex, and Minerva's feline body had already begun to twist to make sure she would land on her feet.

Shaking his head, Albus lowered his wand. Which, of course, was exactly when Minerva slipped back into her human form and crashed onto the field, sending mud and raindrops flying everywhere, to lots of more yelling from the stands and the shrill sound of Madam Hooch's whistle.

Albus, who was quite ready to be done with Quidditch for the day, quickly rose from his seat to get down to the field where Madam Hooch and half of the Gryffindor team had landed to check on Minerva.

"Well, she's out," Madam Hooch said gruffly when Albus reached them.

"I'll get her up to the hospital wing," he volunteered and then looked at the other Gryffindors. "Mr Bayfield, it looks as though you're captain now. Do try to stay on your brooms, if you please."

"Er, yes, Professor," Duncan nodded and waved for a reserve player to come in.

Albus transferred Minerva's unconscious body onto a stretcher and directed her up towards the castle. When he told Madam Hailstone what had happened, she shook her head.

"Why would she turn back into a human? A cat's body is built to survive high falls."

"I don't think it was on purpose," said Albus.

"Unfortunate is what it was. Well, with Gryffindor playing Slytherin for the Cup, it's not as if I wasn't expecting this." Muttering to herself Madam Hailstone got to work.

A concussion, several broken ribs and a collapsed lung were the result of her examination and Albus left to let her do her magic.

He hadn't got far before he ran into Horace, who was grinning broadly but tried to school his features when he spotted Albus.

"Horace, you are of a rather impressive build, but even you can't hide that Cup from me," Albus informed his colleague.

Looking sheepish, Horace pulled out the Quidditch Cup from behind his back. Apparently, the game had ended right after Albus had left. "What can I say? The better team won! But I feel terrible, of course. How is Minerva?"

"She'll be fine, though not very happy, I daresay," Albus replied.

"Oh, but she doesn't need this, does she? With everything she has accomplished, a little school competition should no longer be of any consequence to her!" Horace laughed.

Somehow Albus doubted that Minerva would see it that way.

When Minerva woke up, she instantly had a feeling that the sudden quiet was a bad thing. She knew that she was lying in the hospital wing – she had expected as much – but she should have been able to hear people celebrating. Unless the celebrations were taking place down in the dungeons.

As soon as Madam Hailstone came out of her office to check on her, Minerva asked her what was going on. To her utter disbelief, the matron told her that she didn't know and didn't care. She also refused to let any visitors in, not even her brothers, for several more hours. Eventually Professor Dumbledore entered the hospital wing and Minerva immediately sat up straighter.

"Did we win? Did we lose? What happened?"

Dumbledore slowly approached her bed. Only then did he say, "You and I have a very different understanding of what it means to make smart decisions."

"Noted, Professor," Minerva nodded impatiently. "But did we win?"

"No."

With a groan, Minerva sunk back onto her pillows. Perhaps she could take her N.E.W.T.s in here so she wouldn't have to see the smug look on Sevazlian's face or watch him hold the Quidditch Cup. Oh, she couldn't believe that she would have to leave the school with a Slytherin victory!

"I'm sorry, Professor," she said after she had stewed in her anger for a while and Professor Dumbledore had waited her out.

"For what?"

"For losing Gryffindor the Championship."

Dumbledore shook his head. "I don't think anyone can accuse you of not having gone above and beyond what you could have – or should have – done. That transformation in mid-air was rather impressive. Especially since I assume that you didn't have your wand on you?"

She nodded in confirmation.

"I suspect that is also why you eventually lost control again. It takes time and experience to change without a wand."

"I know. I also had trouble focusing,"

"I hear that can happen with concussions sometimes," Dumbledore replied pointedly.

Minerva sighed. "I know you think I was being careless, but I just really wanted to win that Cup for Gryffindor and give it to you."

"Maybe you will feel better if I give this to you instead," Dumbledore said and placed something on her bedside table.

It was a see-through cube with a ruby floating inside of it that, as Minerva watched, turned into a red rose and then a red hummingbird and back into a ruby to start it all over again. On the base of the cube it said in silver lettering: Transfiguration Today Most Promising Newcomer Award.

Minerva was speechless.

"It'll be in the next edition," Dumbledore informed her. "They wanted to have a big ceremony, but I told them not to. I hope I was correct in assuming that you wouldn't have wanted any fuss in the middle of your N.E.W.T. preparations."

"Absolutely. Thank you, sir," Minerva confirmed. "It's pretty, though."

"It is."

"Did you ever get one of these?"

"No. They didn't have them in my day."

"Huh," said Minerva.

Dumbledore smiled. "I see that makes you happy."

"Well, obviously you would have got one if you could have," Minerva hedged.

"That's quite all right," Dumbledore assured her. "You see, us teachers, we actually hope that our students will surpass us one day. It means that we have done something right."

Minerva tore her eyes away from the award. "Actually, I haven't passed anything yet."

"No, but surely, Transfiguration Todays's Most Promising Newcomer isn't afraid of her Transfiguration N.E.W.T. exam." Dumbledore winked at her.

"No, but I am a little worried what my parents are going to say when they hear that I was in the hospital wing again," Minerva replied.

"Ah," said Dumbledore slowly, "yes, well, perhaps – just this once – there's no need to alarm them."

The thought that Professor Dumbledore wasn't eager to face her father either cheered Minerva up somewhat. But she really needed to start seriously preparing for her N.E.W.T.s, now more than ever. She could only hope that losing the Quidditch Cup wasn't a bad omen.

"This is a library! Not a zoo!" The exasperated voice of the Hogwarts librarian echoed through the halls.

Albus smiled to himself and continued on his way. He really didn't need to get involved in everything.

"Merlin's Beard, enough with the dead birds!"

That on the other hand sounded worth investigating. Albus changed his course and entered the library. It was packed with students studying for their O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s, so he had to survey the room for a moment before he spotted the cause for the librarian's outrage.

Minerva was sitting in a corner, practising for her N.E.W.T.s, which would have been a perfectly normal sight, had it not been for the large swan she had clearly just conjured. It was a flawless conjuration. A swan with magnificent plumage and a long, formed beak – only the bird was indeed very much dead.

When Albus approached her table and Minerva saw him, she quickly made the swan disappear again. Madam Reed still looked miffed, but Albus gave her a wink and she relented. This was exactly why Albus never forgot to get the librarian a Christmas present.

"I know you'll be leaving us soon, but I would still advise you not to pick any fights with the Hogwarts staff before then," Albus said to Minerva.

"I didn't mean to. I was just practising. I don't know why they keep turning up dead today," she replied tersely.

"Well, as you know, your magic is very much tied to your emotions and right now you're squeezing the life out of it – quite literally." Albus nodded towards Minerva's right hand that was holding on to her wand so tightly that her knuckles were turning white.

She dropped her wand on the table and leaned back in her chair.

"Anything you wish to talk about?" Albus offered, hoping to save both her and all those birds from continued torture.

Minerva stayed quiet at first. Then she reached into her pocket and placed three scrolls of parchment on the table. "They all want me."

Albus inspected the scrolls more closely. He recognised the three different insignias on them as belonging to the Magical Law Enforcement Squad, the Wizengamot Administration Services and the Auror Office.

"I believe that's what they call an embarrassment of riches," he said with a soft smile. He wasn't surprised in the least. The Ministry tried to claim the best students coming out of Hogwarts every year, and this year it really wasn't much of a competition.

"But now I'm not so sure anymore if they want me or if they just want the only Animagus currently looking for a job," Minerva said.

"So you have discovered the dilemma that those of us face who possess abilities that our peers do not," Albus nodded thoughtfully.

Minerva shot him a dark look. "You could have told me that earlier."

"So I would have if I had thought that there was even a remote chance it would convince you more than any of the other arguments I had already tried to make," Albus replied.

That brought her up short because she couldn't deny that her mind had been made up and her heart had been set on becoming an Animagus, no matter the cost.

"It doesn't matter," Albus continued. "The Ministry's decision to hire you might not be as informed as you'd like it to be, but it's still very much deserved."

With some of the tension leaving her, Minerva looked at the three scrolls. "Which would you choose?"

"It's not my choice to make," Albus said simply. He could hardly tell her that he was torn between wishing she wouldn't set foot inside the Ministry to avoid the risk of losing who she was, and hoping she would be strong enough to go on and do what he couldn't.

"So you still won't give me a straight answer – not even this close to the end?" she challenged him. She was way too clever by now not to know that he was holding back.

But Albus just smiled at her. "How curious. Those do not look like endings to me at all," he said, nodding towards her job offers before he left her to her studying again, which, in any case, was more important than to have conversations with him.

"So, do you think we could see it? Not as an official part of the examination, of course, but out of personal curiosity?"

Minerva looked into the face of Professor Marchbanks, who had insisted on being the one to test her in her practical Transfiguration exam. There was no need to ask what 'it' was. "Of course, Professor."

She still wasn't practised enough to change securely without her wand, so Minerva held on to it while she visualised the Tabby cat and felt the change come over her. Thankfully, it was no longer painful and only a tiny bit uncomfortable.

Once she found herself on four paws, she jumped onto the nearest desk and on to the next, as always enjoying the agility and flexibility of her feline form and the certainty that she wouldn't misstep or fall. When she had made it around the room that way, she launched herself into the air and changed back into human form. That was a bit of a risk. The cat in her couldn't stumble, but the human very much could. But she had timed the transformation perfectly this time and she reappeared standing before Professor Marchbanks, who had a big grin on her face.

"Wonderful! Truly magnificent!" she cheered. "Well, I think that is all we could possibly ask to see from you today," she said as she picked up her clipboard. "Unless you have any more tricks up your sleeve?"

"No, Professor."

"Thank Merlin! Because I don't have anything higher to give you than an Outstanding." Professor Marchbanks winked at her and let her go.

Minerva left the exam room and stopped in the Entrance Hall, not sure where she wanted to go. She was done with her exams for today and she should have gone back up to the common room to prepare for tomorrow, but she wasn't quite ready yet.

She heard music coming from the Great Hall and poked her head inside to see what was going on. It was the school choir, practising for the upcoming graduation ceremony.

"Once more, please, with feeling," said Professor Oldroyd, the Choir master.

The choir launched into a powerful rendition of "Hoggy Warty Hogwarts."

Minerva laughed and burst into tears at the same time.

A/N: Just gearing up for Minerva's graduation here. So stay tuned. :)