Chapter 48

Abby looked up to see Echo coming in. She knew why she was there. It was a breach in protocol and Abby knew it. She shouldn't be sharing a patient's health with anyone else but the patient. Raven was a special case though. Clarke, Raven, and Echo had come to her to explain why she was tell Echo what was going on with her. It didn't make it any easier, but as she saw Raven coming in to see her multiple times a week, sometimes for injuries, she realized that they were doing it to see how far Raven was going to push herself in this quest to learn to fight.

Today, it seemed that the line was pushed pretty far. Raven was limping more than normal. She told Abby that it was her own fault, but Abby could see it that it was the training. She was being pushed too far and soon she would break. She wasn't sure how much longer Raven would be able to use the brace before it broke. And, Abby knew that if the brace broke, Raven would break, too.

"How is she, Abby?"

"In pain."

"Did she say that?" Echo asked her.

"No, and you know it. She wouldn't admit to it even if we burned her. She is too stubborn for that. She'll bear the pain because she believes that it will just go away. It never has but still she pushes and pushes. One day her leg is just going to give out, Echo and then what will you do?" Abby questioned with anger.

"I don't want to hurt her, Abby. I never have. I want her to train, but I need to know what her limits are."

"She's found them."

"Today? Yes, I am afraid that she did. She pushed and I pushed back."

"What did you say to her?"

"I asked if she ever thought that she could run with her brace on, if the knee would give. She told me that it was impossible. Her leg would give out as soon as she attempted to bend it. I don't understand healer stuff, Abby, but I know that she is in more pain than just her leg. She is breaking daily and she thinks that she has to be ready for a coming war. We broke her on Earth and she is just trying to put the pieces back together. I don't think that she cares about the pain. It reminds her that she is alive, but I devastated her when I told her that without being able to run she wouldn't be allowed to fight with the army."

Abby's eyes went wide. Raven's maniacal rants from earlier started making more sense. She pulled up Raven's files and reports. She sat down at her desk and Echo sat on the other side. It was time for them to go over Raven's progress and injuries for the week.

"She has all the normal bumps and bruises, but none of them are too serious. She is actually luckier than Bellamy this week. Indra gave him a beating for not paying attention during training the other day."

"So, that is why his lip was split again," Echo stated, with a slight grin.

Abby smiled back. She knew that Indra was hard on him and it was justly deserved. She just wished that Bellamy would learn not to push Indra so far. She had been a warrior longer than he'd been alive. She knew what it took and she knew how to train for war. Bellamy only thought like a Skaiman, which Abby had to admit that without Clarke's help, she would, too.

"Echo..." Abby quietly admonished but laughed right along with her.

"What? I can't help it that he hasn't learned to hold his tongue yet. He's lucky that it was only his lip. She told me what he said. I would have probably struck him with a blade. At least, she only used her fist," Echo told her.

Abby quirked an eyebrow at her, "Has that happened with Raven?"

"No, it hasn't. She actually bites her tongue. I can tell when she is doing it. She's stubborn, but she is no fool."

"Her leg is bothering her more."

"I know," Echo replied.

"Her last nerve test is bothering me, though."

"Why?"

"I'm not sure. She hasn't lost any more feeling, but she's describing pain in areas that she shouldn't feel a thing. I want to say that it is akin to 'phantom limb' syndrome, but she still has her entire leg. The brace allows her to hold herself up on it. It is acting as a support structure because her nerves aren't telling her muscles to work properly."

"How are her muscles then?"

"They are getting bigger and stronger the more she works with you. I was thinking of asking Niylah to help her stretch out after training daily. She needs to work the muscles out, too. I don't know what is causing the pain, but her condition hasn't medically changed, Echo."

"I'm training her for nothing then?" Echo asked.

"I never said that. You are helping her feel like she is needed. She knows that she is for her brain, but she sees all of you fighting and she feels left out. I know that is the reason she is doing this. She is still haunted by what happened at the Mountain," Abby stated.

"She couldn't fight back and Wick was killed."

"Yes, she blames herself."

"But, it was the Mountain Men, not her that killed him," Echo defended quickly.

"That is true. What she is suffering from is called 'Survivor's Guilt.' She believes that she should have done more or died with him. She accepted it for a while because she was punished. They drilled into her hip, but it healed. She got up. She walked. She starting working again. But, in the end, the pain drove to take A.L.I.E.'s chip. She..."

"Needs someone to push her to break," Echo replied.

"I'm afraid that if we break her, we won't get her back."

"Leave that to me, Abby. I will break her and I will heal her. It isn't her body I am going to push. I am going to push her mind."

"How?"

"Leave that to me. Thank you for caring for her. If anything changes, let me know immediately. I am responsible for her life now as she is my sekkon."

"Even if she'll never be able to take your place?" Abby inquired.

Echo looked at her. She wanted to say something, but she didn't want to be rude. Abby was a great person but she only saw what she wanted sometimes. Raven was special. There was a reason that the gods spared her and kept her alive. There was a reason that her leg felt pain.

"She is a warrior, Abby. Never doubt that. I don't," Echo answered as she stood. "Good-day."

Echo didn't wait for Abby to answer her. She was starting to get angry and she knew that it wouldn't do any good for her to yell at Abby. She was just giving Echo her healer's thoughts. But, Abby hasn't seen Raven in action, hasn't seen her fight, and Echo has. There is something going on with her leg, but she doesn't know what it is. She left the clinic and went outside. She let out a huff and saw the guards training under her brother's watchful eyes. She smiled at him and made a gesture.

He pointed towards the stables and she nodded. She stalked over there because she was trying to burn off the building anger at Abby's doubts. She knew that it did her no good to argue with Abby. She was no healer, but she had seen stranger things before on the battlefield. Raven knew her limits even if she didn't want to believe what they were.

"She can't run, but maybe, she can ride," Echo stated as she walked into the stables.

Immediately, she saw Palla and Clarke talking. Shaking her head, she approached them. She waited far enough away that she wasn't within earshot, but close enough for Clarke to finally see her. Clarke pointed to her right wrist where her father's watch used to sit. Echo recognized it as a sign about time and she nodded. She didn't know if Clarke was trying to get away from Palla or if she was asking her another question about the day or something. It didn't matter. Clarke put up her hand and Palla immediately stopped talking.

"I'm sorry. Let me see what Echo needs. It's check up day. I'll be right back and then we can go for that ride," Clarke told her as she walked away from Palla and to Echo, some feet away. "What is it? Is something wrong with Raven?"

"No, nothing like that."

"Is it Madi?" Clarke immediately inquired.

"No, she is fine."

"Then, what is it?"

"I want you to do something."

"What?" Clarke questioned with a puzzled look.

"Your mother said some very curious things to me today about Raven's leg."

"And?"

"I want you to test her."

"Me?"

"Yes," Echo said flatly.

"You don't trust my mother?"

"I don't trust her judgement in the matter, no," Echo replied.

"Why?"

"She believes that Raven is trying to hurt herself."

"And, she isn't?"

"No, she isn't."

"What is she trying to do?"

"Prove herself to you and Madi," Echo said quietly.

"But, why?"

"She wants to be able to fight. She knows that leg hinders her. It was obvious at the Mountain. She could drive the Rover. She can fire a gun, but she can't fight. She doesn't have the training or the ability to do what Octavia can, what you can, or even Madi. It bothers her. The only damage that she would be able to do is explosive or from far away," Echo explained.

"And, what do you think?"

"I think that she needs a second opinion on her leg," Echo replied.

Clarke sucked in a breath. She'd challenged her mother's finding before, but nothing like this. Nothing this major, and she wasn't sure that she could actually do it. Getting Raven to agree to it first was going to be hard enough. Getting her mother out of the clinic or out of the way long enough for her to do any of the tests that she could think of would be damned near impossible.

"You want me to scan it?"

"I do."

"I...I haven't...I don't know..."

"You are trained fisa, are you not?" Echo asked her.

"I never finished it, but..."

"Your mother taught you how to use the equipment, right?"

"She did, but..."

"And, you have patched us all up on numerous occasions. You know enough to help her, Clarke. Do it," Echo demanded.

By now curiosity had gotten the better of Palla and she'd walked closer. Echo saw her, but she didn't say anything. She figured it was because of the way Clarke's body was reacting to their conversation.

"I'll deal with Abby," Palla said as actually joined in their conversation and Clarke just turned to stare at her. "I'll take care of getting Abby out of the clinic. You two need to get Raven and do your tests. Or, reroute everything into Engineering and do it in there. But, either way, you both need to do this for not only your peace of mind, but Raven's as well. We all know that she isn't going to stop. And, be honest, Echo, you wouldn't have brought this to Clarke, now, if you didn't feel like there was something that Abby might be missing."

"I speak the truth," Echo stated.

"Then do it. What would it hurt? Nothing. It will either confirm or deny whatever Echo is thinking. If it denies it, she'll just have to work with Raven on dealing with the fact that her leg will keep her in defense mode and not offence. If Echo is right..."

"Then, Raven could walk normally again..."

"She could run," Echo added. "She would get her wish to be a warrior. I made her my sekkon to protect her from herself, Clarke. Help me."

"Palla, get her out for an hour. I'll reroute the programs I want to Raven's lab. I'm sure that she has enough equipment in there that I can use to run the tests. It might be crude, but if we get some strange results..." Clarke stated.

"We'll move her to the med bay and try again to see what they say," Echo finished for her.

"Go to Raven, I'll follow you soon."

Echo nodded and turned to run. Once she was out of the stables, Clarke turned to Palla. She could see the disappointment on her face.

"I need to do this."

"I know. You have to take care of your people. I understand it above everyone, Clarke. You don't have to rationalize your decisions to me."

"Thank you," Clarke replied.

"For worrying about Raven, too?"

"Yes. You worry about my people as much as you worry about your own. Thank you for that."

"I'll put the caballos back," Palla stated as she turned to go do just that.

Clarke reached out and stopped her. Palla looked down at the hand on her arm and then back into Clarke's expressive, blue eyes. She furrowed her brows in question and waited for Clarke to say something.

"Wait. Not yet. We can still go for that ride. Can our ride wait a few hours, at least?" Clarke asked her.

"It can," Palla answered hopeful that they would still be able to go out.

"It won't take me more than a few hours to do these. Once I get the tests run, I will have to wait for the computer to compile everything for me. We can go ride while it is working. I'll read them tonight and let Echo know what I think in the morning. Where do you want me to meet you?"

"I don't know. Where would be easier for you? Engineering or..."

Clarke smiled, "I'll meet you in the mess for lunch."

"Sounds good."