Chapter 64

Clarke sat outside watching the warriors train. She knew that Indra was working them hard at Echo's behest. They would be training through the snow for the right to earn a spot in the Trials. She wasn't looking forward to that, but she knew that it was necessary. Jusgona were the elite guard and the protectors of Heda. She didn't want Madi to be alone and without ample guards.

As she watched them fight, she was reminded of Anya, Gustus and Ryder. They were the most trusted warriors for Lexa. Gustus betrayed her, but he had his reasons. Anya died because she was a Grounder in the wrong place at the wrong time. Clarke had tried to protect her, but she was dressed as a Grounder, too. Ryder died in service to Lexa, trying to protect the throne from Ontari and paid with his life for refusing her. All three of them had an impact on Clarke and how she saw things between Heda and their peoples. But, it was Anya that had the greatest impact on her.

"You're worried about something," Madi said as she sat down to join her.

"I am."

"What?"

"I was just thinking about Anya," Clarke told her.

"Ah, Lexa's mentor. Can I ask why?"

"Do you have her memories of Anya?"

"I do," Madi answered.

"Then you should know."

"How long did you know Anya?" Madi questioned.

"It was only for a couple of days. We escaped the Mountain together. She was trying to get back to Lexa to broker a peace between our people, but she was killed before she could go."

"Was her death avenged?" Madi inquired.

"I don't know."

"You don't know? Who killed her? Do you know?"

"I'm not sure who actually fired the shot, but yes, I know that Skaikru killed her."

Madi looked confused. Skaikru killed Anya, but yet, Clarke wasn't sure who actually fired the shot. She looked at Clarke and saw the pain in her eyes. She knew that Anya's death weighed on her and now she knew why.

"Did you not ask?"

"It was one of the guards on the gate. I never asked their names to protect them from Lexa. I understood why they fired. They were afraid. They shot me, too and took me hostage. It was only Mom recognizing me that saved me from being thrown back into a cell," Clarke told her.

"But, you gave Lexa Anya's braid," Madi stated.

"I did."

"How did you know?"

"One of my other dealings with Anya."

"What happened?" Madi asked. "I don't know this story. Will you tell me?"

"Anya kidnapped me and Finn."

"The murderer?"

"He hadn't broken then. He was still sweet and trying to find peace between the hundred and the Grounders. He was the catalyst, but he wouldn't leave my side. He was worried about me. He just got caught with me when Anya had me taken."

"But, why did she take you?"

"Raven built a bomb to blow the bridge between Ton DC and the Drop Ship. In the process of blowing the bridge, Anya's newest sekken Tris was badly wounded. Somehow, probably through Lincoln, Anya learned that I was a fisa. So, she had me captured as payment. Either I healed Tris, or I died for all the deaths at the bridge."

"Tris died?"

"She did. She was beyond what I could do in their war camp. I didn't have Mom or the right tools. Nyko was too far away or another camp, I don't know. I did everything I could, but it just wasn't enough."

"But, she didn't kill you," Madi stated.

"It wasn't for lack of trying. She issued the kill order for both Finn and I, but Lincoln managed to get us away from the Trikru and their lands. He was labeled a traitor for helping us and started living on his own near us."

"To be near Octavia?"

"That was part of the reason. He wanted peace, too. He knew that Anya was blinded by both fear and anger. He wanted to try to make peace with us because he saw us for what we were," Clarke explained.

"Things seem very complicated."

"They were. But, in the Mountain, things changed. Anya saw me as her ticket back into Lexa's good graces. I saw her as an ally to save both our peoples. Neither of us could have been prepared for what awaited us just outside the gates of Camp Jaha. She promised to take word to Lexa for me and I promised to speak with my people."

"You never got the chance?"

"She died. Lexa came calling with her Army. Things were tense, but we managed to make it work until Pike."

"He was just as frightened as Anya was," Madi countered.

"But, Anya gave us a chance. She tried to anyway. I'll never know what could have happened had Anya made it to Lexa. And, I'll never know understand the pain that Lexa felt when I handed her Anya's braid."

"Sure, you will, or do," Madi stated.

"We didn't have relationships like that on the Ark, Madi. I was Mom's second, for lack of a better explanation, but I never finished my training. In the end, I became the leader and Wanheda. I still help Mom with procedures, but I've never had a close partnership with anyone the way that Pramas en Sekkens. I only have the friendships that I have developed with the rest of the hundred. We all became close because of necessity."

"That is where the roles of Pramas en Sekkens come from, Clarke. Necessity. Survival. You know what it like to lose someone close to you. Lexa loved Anya like a sister. She was family when she had none. The same that you have with the rest of the hundred, the same you have with me," Madi told her.

Clarke turned and looked at her. She smiled at the younger girl and then took her in her arms, holding her tightly. Their bond was strong. And, the more that Clarke thought about it, the more she realized that since she wasn't Madi's mother, she was essentially her Prama, even though she was now Heda.

"I am not going to lose you, Madi."

"I don't plan on doing anything to cause my death, Clarke, but we both know that it isn't something that we can prevent. If it is my time, it is my time. You will have to let me go."

"No, I don't," Clarke stated as she pushed back a little ways from Madi and met her clear blue eyes, so much like her own, so much like her father's.

"Yes, you do. Just like with Lexa, Clarke. You will have to let me go and remove the flame. You will have to give it to the next Heda, Clarke. You will have to help Gaia find the next Heda."

"No, I won't, because you aren't going to die until after I do."

"How can you assure that?" Madi asked her.

"You forget that I am Wanheda and I command death," Clarke replied, her voice full of passion, determination and fire.

"Clarke?"

"Yes, Madi?"

"I know that you will do everything in your power to make sure that nothing ever happens to me. I know that. I love you for that. I expect nothing less because you have been more or less my nomon, but even you can't stop everything."

"But, I can try," Clarke replied.

"Can I ask you something?"

"You can ask me anything, Madi. I've told you that before. What is it that you want to know, now?" Clarke asked her.

"You saw Anya take Tris's braid. You took Anya's and gave it to Lexa. But, you never took one from Lexa," Madi stated.

"Was that your question?"

"Sha, you loved her, but you never kept part of her for yourself," Madi said in Trig.

"I have her in my heart. I have her in my memories. I have her in my sketches and drawings. But, no, I never took a braid from her because her hair wasn't braided when she died. But, there was more to it than that. Things were very hectic in the moments she died. Titus had betrayed his oath as Flaimkepa. He killed her because he thought that I was corrupting her and turning her away from being Heda. She loved me and that was a crime in his eyes. But, when she took the bullet meant for me, by accident, he...he broke a little. I know that he loved her, but he knew his duty. He took the flame from her and gave it to me to save it. He was afraid that Ontari would ascend. He also knew that I was a better judge of what should happen. Aden was Lexa's choice and had the conclave happened, I am sure that he would have won. I kept the Flame because for me it was still Lexa. It was the only thing that I had left of her. I kept it until I couldn't, until I had to trade it to protect the lives of the people from Ontari and A.L.I.E. And, in the end, I took the Flame to save us all from A.L.I.E."

"But, you didn't keep it for yourself?" Madi asked her.

"I couldn't. I didn't have Night Blood then. We used Ontari to give me Night Blood so my body wouldn't reject the Flame. By the time that I actually had Night Blood, the world was ending. I was the only person that had Night Blood, but Gaia refused to give it to me," Clarke told her.

"Why?"

"Because I wasn't raised on Earth. Because I wasn't born a Night Blood, I was made. She saw it as a corruption of the faith and the meaning behind the Flame. She didn't know what I knew. And, in the end, they decided to have the conclave in which Octavia won. She secured the bunker, but she knew that she couldn't take the Flame, either. She wasn't a Night Blood."

"Am I the last?" Madi asked her.

"From Earth?"

"Yes," Madi replied.

"That we know of, yes. You are. That is why the people follow you even though you didn't have to fight in the conclave. They believe that your fight was survival on the surface while they were in the bunker. You are the new Pramheda. You are the first of new set of Hedas and new laws. You are the first Heda of Helios," Clarke explained.

"I will not forget them, Clarke."

"I am not asking you to, Madi. I never would. The Hedas of old shaped your world and the world you grew up in. I wouldn't expect you to forget them or anything that you learned on Earth, Madi. They are not only part of you and your ancestry. They are part of your culture and I will not let it die completely. We will do everything that we can to preserve most of your way of life. I did what I could for you when it was just the two of us. You taught me as well as I taught you. We will get it all written down so that the surviving twelve krus are not forgotten. We maybe one kru, but we are built from many," Clarke told her.

"And, we will continue to survive."

"We will. Have you been down to the site, lately?" Clarke asked her.

"I have. You should go with us tomorrow. I want you to see it. I know that you aren't particularly happy about the name, but they are honoring you, Clarke."

"I laugh about it, Madi."

"Why?"

"It is from a very famous story from before the bombs. It is about a special kid and magic. I think that you would like it. I need to see if I can find a copy of it."

"Would you read it to me?"

"Yes, Madi, I will. And, I'll help you read it, too. You need to be able to read both English and Trigedasleng."

"There is no true written version of Trig, Clarke."

"I know. We'll work on it. I know that there are many stories to tell. I want to have as many recorded as we can. We've already lost so much..."

"We have, but you've kept us together. You're still fighting to keep us as one. The people haven't forgotten that, Clarke."

She looked at Madi for a few more moments and then nodded. She turned back to watch the warriors fighting in the Pins. She knew that Indra was keeping up their pacing and working them hard. She saw Echo down there with her, looking them all over with her critical eyes. She saw Bellamy trying so hard to be better and earn their respect after the fallout with his sister.

She turned and watched the people milling around working on stores for the coming Snows and building their new settlement. She knew that they were working together for a common goal and they each had their part to play. They knew this from a young age, but it was surprising now to see how adept those from Skaikru had become to working with them all without reservation. Time and survival will break everyone and mold them into one unit.

"We need to check in with Diyoza," Clarke said suddenly.

"Should be ride out?"

"I think so," Clarke said.

"I'll get Echo," Madi replied standing.

"I'll get the caballos."