Severus sat in Lucius' study studying the man. He wondered if this was an awful idea but he needed answers.
He cleared his throat, making Lucius smirk.
"Ah, so you're finally ready to reveal the real reason for your visit, old friend?"
He glared half-heartedly before speaking, "I spoke with Andromeda last week." he began, gauging Lucius's reaction. "She advised against Hermione meeting Ella."
Lucius' face was guarded before he sighed. "I'm not entirely surprised. Cissa and I had reservations too."
He sat stunned for a moment. "And when were you going to share these reservations?"
"Hermione writes, you know? In fact, Cissa hears from her more than Draco. Not that that would be difficult, the boy is a terrible correspondent."
Severus blinked, as he attempted to find the reason behind that statement.
"I was aware she wrote." he began slowly, "I am unsure as to why you're telling me, however."
Lucius looked at him pensively, "Ella writes too. Not as often but occasionally. We've seen her several times over the years. She hasn't asked after Hermione once. You are aware I had no idea of Hermione's existence, but Cissa says that on the odd occasion she has brought up the child, Ella has changed the subject rapidly, dismissing it as unimportant. Her lifestyle is...unusual."
"Unusual how?"
"She lives in a small house on a beach. She has no responsibilities and she comes and goes as she pleases. She travels frequently and has a plethora of friends that join her on occasion. She….enjoys a party. Detests being reminded that she should consider settling down a little. She has become…..vapid. She uses her intelligence in card games and horse race predictions and other than that, she shops. She has become, in many ways, like those society wives she despised so much, at least during the day. At night, I'm not sure she's aged beyond her teenage years. I….I love her, but I am not sure I like who she's become. And let us not pretend that the indicators were not there. She has always been careless when not under her father's eye, always been the one to push the boundaries of propriety, it was….endearing, refreshing even, when we were young but it is like she has never grown up and I must confess that it is challenging to spend time with her. I have a feeling that it will be more so now we've gotten to know Hermione."
"And tell me, Lucius, when exactly you were planning on sharing this with me?" he asked, his voice hard as he attempted to process what he'd just been told.
Lucius sighed. "We weren't sure. We could be wrong and Ella and Hermione may have a reasonable relationship eventually, us telling you could have prevented that. We debated about it for a long time, however, we had intended to share it before you introduced her to Hermione. We had assumed you would be in touch to discuss a date."
"I see. And do you have one?"
"Yes. The first Wednesday of the holidays. Hermione mentioned that her parents will be at work the first week and then they're away to France for a fortnight. We thought that if you'll still consent to them meeting, it would give her the most time to recover should it go badly."
Severus sighed, loudly. "For fucks sake Lucius! How am I meant to prepare Hermione for that?"
"Bring her here. I am aware she does not wish to see me, however, you and Cissa could speak to her. Or Cissa could come to you once the exams are completed."
He nodded thoughtfully. "I think that may be better. Is she available on the Thursday before the school breaks up?"
"She'll ensure she is, Severus."
He nodded shortly, "What a fucking mess, Lucius." he sighed, rubbing a hand over his forehead, the ever-present ache threatening to turn into a full-blown migraine. "Have you given any thought to when you'll meet Hermione's parents?"
Lucius winced. "Yes. I'd rather she speak to me sooner rather than later, however, I have no wish to intrude on their first weekend. Do you think they'd be amenable to dinner on the Monday evening?"
Severus raised his eyebrows in shock. "I shall ask. I think inviting them to Prince Hall may be better, it's neutral. Hermione has requested to spend some of the summer with me as her parents will be at work, it would allow them to see where she will be staying, assuming they consent. They have not yet replied to my owl."
"Do you think they will refuse?"
"I don't know," he said slowly. "I made it clear that Hermione could return to see them whenever she wishes, however, I am off and they are at work, it makes sense and allows us to get to know one another out with the prying eyes of the school. It's a big change, however, especially as they see her so infrequently."
Lucius nodded thoughtfully. "I hope they agree, old friend, fatherhood suits you. I'm sorry Ella never gave you a chance."
He looked at Lucius, unused to his friend being this serious.
"As am I," he replied quietly.
Severus tried not to fidget as he sat in his daughter's home, wishing she was here with him to act as a buffer.
"You must understand we have concerns." Jean Granger looked lost as she addressed him. That didn't bode well. "It's not that we don't want her to get to know you but you get her all year and now, it feels as if you're stealing her for the summer too. I know it's irrational. I'm just scared that we're losing her."
Fuck he was not emotionally able to deal with this. He knew her fears were justified but they'd had thirteen fucking years. He'd had an interrupted nine months. This was fucking hard. He needed to get this right or they'd refuse to allow him his daughter over the summer. And he couldn't face that. He tried to summon some semblance of tact as he attempted to figure out what Minerva would say. She was better at this sort of thing.
"I understand. However, Hermione loves you. You are her parents and I cannot see a world where she does not want to see you. I admit she mentioned that it is hard for her to find the words to help you understand, much of what she does in school must seem insane, but that does not mean she does not wish to try. If you'll let me, I can attempt to help bridge that gap. I am, after all, aware of what is going on in the school and if you wish, you can write to me at any time and I can promise to inform you if something major is happening."
"Would you?" Jean Granger looked close to tears. "The things you've told us about the troll and her first year, she never mentioned any of it. I think she must have been scared we would make her leave."
"If you wish me to, yes. Dr Granger, I am not trying to take Hermione away, however, I would like to get to know her better and as I said in my letter, she mentioned that you generally work during the week."
"We do." she hedged.
"As you know we have a means of travelling instantly. I am off for the entirety of the holidays, she could spend the days with me, stay over so you don't need to worry about her in the mornings but spend as many evenings and weekends with you as she and you wished."
He watched as Jean shared a look with her husband.
"You promise that she can be here on weekends and in the evenings?"
"Yes."
"OK." she released a long breath, "Ok, Severus, we'll agree. On the condition that some of those weekends and evenings, you join her. We'd like to get to know you better too. You've already won over Hermione, she mentioned your libraries." she said with a smirk that startled a laugh from him. Trust his daughter to mention the libraries.
"Yes, she was reluctant to leave the one in my home."
"Of course, she was," Jean replied with a roll of her eyes, "Now. These Malfoys. I'm not sure I understand."
He sighed. "Her biological mother is Lucius Malfoy's cousin. Hermione has met both him and his wife, Narcissa. Their son, Draco, is in Hermione's year at school. They have become friends. Lucius has had some…..serious lapses in judgement. He wishes to meet you in order to gain Hermione's forgiveness. He has never been around muggles and his prejudice has left him with some….opinions. That he is willing to meet you may not sound like a concession however, for him, it is huge. Hermione will not forgive him unless he behaves like a decent human being in your presence and I am not going to lie, I am hoping meeting you will cause him to reconsider his own assumptions. In fact, if I were you, I would insist on meeting him more than once before allowing Hermione in his home unsupervised."
"His prejudiced opinions are….what exactly?" Richard Granger spoke for the first time.
Severus sighed, having hoped not to have to go over this this evening.
"He believes muggles to be….lesser because they have no magic. His opinions of them are stuck in the era when the witch trials were very much present and as he spends no time whatsoever in your world, he has no idea that anything has moved on. There is a…..fear almost, of what he does not understand combined with a taught superiority complex."
"He believes we still hunt witches?" Richard asked incredulously. "How has he avoided seeing things have changed?"
"Lucius lives in a large manor with extensive grounds in the middle of the Wiltshire countryside. As you know we have the floo network, and apparition to get around, he has no need to visit muggle areas. He is of course aware of developments in housing and traffic, he does, after all, visit other countries; many muggle attractions have a separate wizarding area which means he has to pass through the muggle side. However, if you handed him a phone or asked him to switch on a light he would have no idea what to do."
"And you do?" Richard asked sharply.
Severus fought to contain his eye roll, he knew they were struggling with his place in Hermione's life and it was making things tense but for fucks sake, they knew where he had grown up. "As you know, my father was a muggle. I grew up in Cokeworth and as such, I have made sure I remained up to date with muggle advances. I may not live in the muggle world now but I once did, and my daughter does, Hogwarts has many muggleborn students. I believe it is important that I am not ignorant. On top of that, I miss the TV and films. The wizarding world has nothing like them."
"Nothing at all?" Jean asked curiously, reminding him forcibly of their daughter.
"No. They have theatre and a wizarding wireless but nothing at all like a TV. It's rather depressing if I'm honest, there are only so many books you can read."
Jeans snorted, "Never let Hermione hear you say that!"
He smiled slightly as he inclined his head, acknowledging her advice, beside her the male Dr Granger was still glowering slightly.
Hermione flopped onto his sofa looking exhausted. Exams had ended the previous day and he was sure she hadn't been sleeping.
"Remind me why I had to be there this early?" she groaned as she covered her eyes with her arm.
"Your Aunt Cissa and I would like to have a talk with you."
"You didn't say Aunt Cissa was coming. Is this to do with Uncle Lucius?" she asked as she sat up straighter, looking him in the eye. He could see the dark circles from across the room.
"No, it is not. How badly have you been sleeping?"
She looked slightly confused for a moment by his change of subject.
"I….I never sleep well when I'm stressed," she said with a shrug.
"Hermione, what on earth did you have to be stressed about? You know the course material backwards, all of your Professors say so."
"But what if I messed it up? You don't know that I didn't!"
He snorted. "I do, actually. Next year we are going to discuss a reasonable study schedule and you are going to promise me that you'll come to me if you cannot sleep. Am I clear?"
"What do you mean, you do?" she screeched. Fuck that was shrill.
"Hermione, teachers talk. You've exceeded all expectations, now for the love of Merlin, relax and promise me that there will not be this madness next year!"
"Yes, Father," she responded, slightly petulantly. "Will you tell me how I did?"
"No. I will not, you'll have to wait like everyone else. However know that you passed everything" he laughed as he sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Her head thunked onto his shoulder as she curled her legs underneath herself and closed her eyes.
"That's mean."
He laughed at her "You'll live. There will be no repeat of this nonsense next year, my girl. And tonight you will take some dreamless sleep and go to bed early."
"Yes, Father," she murmured as she snuggled into his side, clearly intent on going back to sleep.
He had intended to prepare her slightly for Narcissa's visit, however, it was clear she needed the sleep more so he pulled her into him and summoned his book as she slept.
Narcissa arrived an hour later, an unreadable expression on her face that softened as she looked down at where Hermione was still sleeping on his shoulder. She reached down and brushed a curl behind her ear.
"She looks so peaceful." she said softly, "It seems a shame to wake her."
"And yet we must, I will not allow her to walk into that meeting unprepared, Cissa."
"I know. I just….." she looked lost for a moment. "This is more difficult than I imagined. I miss Ella how she was. She was my best friend, and I barely recognise her now. It doesn't help that I'm angry with her. I've been angry with her for years, really. I didn't understand the magnitude of what she was doing before but the moment I held Draco in my arms I could not understand her complete lack of feeling. She brushed Hermione off as if she were nothing, and at first, I had assumed it was because it hurt her but on one of my visits she admitted that she never wanted to be a parent, that she felt nothing for the child. And that's fine, really, some people are not made to be parents but when I asked her why she hadn't told the baby's father, she told me that while she truly did believe they wouldn't be interested, she was more scared that they would be and then everyone would know. She was worried that someone, you, her father or someone else, I'm not sure, would force her back and make her be a parent. And while part of me understands her fear, seeing you with Hermione now, I'm not sure if I can forgive her for not giving you the chance. She could have dropped her off anonymously, and disappeared as she did but she insisted on the muggle hospital. I'm sorry I complied."
He looked at Narcissa briefly before he closed his eyes, unable to stomach what he'd just been told. Why the fuck did Ella want to meet Hermione now? And why the fuck was he letting her? He glanced down at the sleeping girl on his shoulder and wondered how they were going to get her through this unscathed. She didn't deserve this. How the fuck could her mother feel nothing? He thought of his own parents and silently acknowledged the truth of Narcissa's statement that some people were not made to have children, he forced himself to allow Ella the same concession. However, he could admit that he was struggling to forgive her for not allowing him to be in Hermione's life. It got harder the more he got to know her and while he was trying to justify it, he was struggling with the rage he felt at having missed the first thirteen years of his daughter's life.
"We need to warn her," was all he said as he moved, speaking softly to Hermione as he moved her from his shoulder.
She blinked blearily up at them both, yawning.
"Aunt Cissa," she still sounded sleepy.
"Hello, Hermione. Hard exams?"
"Oh, they weren't too bad," she said with a blush and a shrug, refusing to meet his eyes.
He stifled a laugh as Narcissa looked at him. "She's not been sleeping as she was worried about failing. Which was absurd." He said pointedly.
"What was it you wanted to talk to me about?" she asked changing the subject before he could continue.
Severus took a deep breath in. "We wished to speak to you about your mother," he began, noticing her tense.
"What about her?" she asked warily, her eyes darting between him and Narcissa. He reached for her, pulling her into his side. "I'm not going to like this, am I? '' she asked softly.
"Hermione, your mother is….complicated. I know that when you asked I told you stories from our childhood and let you believe that she was wonderful," Narcissa said gently. "I shouldn't have. She was my best friend, and while, in many ways, she was wonderful growing up, she also had flaws. She wishes to meet you, however, your father and I wanted you to be prepared before you make any decisions."
"Prepared for what?"
Narcissa sighed, sending a pleading look his way. For fucks sake did she think he had any idea what to do with this?
"Your mother has never liked the expectations that came from a life within her social circle. She rebelled as a teen, quietly and without her father's notice, but it was a rebellion nonetheless. She found that world stifling. And now, she lives a life free from responsibilities, she…..wasn't sure she was ready for them when she found out she was pregnant."
"So she never wanted me? I was just something that would tie her down?" Hermione asked bluntly, making both him and Narcissa wince.
"It wasn't you sweetheart, she just didn't feel like she was the best person to be a parent."
"So what's changed?"
He glanced at Narcissa. This was unnerving. Given how frequently the girl had cried in the last few months he'd expected at least a few tears, prepared himself for it even. He hadn't the first clue how to deal with this angry, hard-eyed girl beside him.
"I do not know. Perhaps she is realising what she gave up." Narcissa hedged.
"What, now someone else has done all the hard work?" Hermione asked scathingly.
Fucking bloody hell, what were they meant to do with this?
"Hermione, sweetheart, it's alright to be angry" he tried, "You do not have to meet her."
"No," she spat. "I want her to explain to my face exactly why I wasn't worth keeping. Why she couldn't be bothered to inform anyone else, including you, of my existence. Can I go now? I am sufficiently prepared."
She moved to stand up so quickly it surprised him and she was halfway to the door before he realised what was going on. He only just retrieved his wand to lock it before she reached it.
"Let me out!" she growled her voice dangerously low.
"No. Not until you tell me exactly what you're thinking."
"No. God damn it, let me fucking out!"
He blinked in surprise at her language, having never heard her curse before, moving cautiously over to where she was still facing the door. She was shaking he realised as he moved closer, and her posture was rigid as if she were fighting herself to remain in control.
"Hermione sweetheart," he said softly as he approached, moving slowly around her until he could see her face. His heart broke as he saw the tears falling silently down her cheeks, her hands balled into shaking fists, as she fought to hold herself together.
"Oh my girl," he whispered as he pulled her into him. He felt her knees buckle as she clung to him, sobbing. Sweeping her up, he moved back over to the sofa, settling her on his lap and rocking her as he imagined one would with a younger child. Narcissa looked stricken on the sofa across from them.
"It's alright, sweetheart, I've got you," he whispered into her hair, feeling utterly helpless. He felt the sofa dip next to him as Narcissa sat down and began rubbing soothing circles on her back.
"What did I do wrong?" he heard her ask, "Why didn't she want me? If the person who is supposed to love me can't, what does that say about me?"
"It says nothing about you!" he growled fiercely as he tightened his arms around her, "Do you hear me, Hermione? You did nothing wrong!" He gentled his voice as she lifted her head to look at him, disbelief painted all over her tear-stained face, "You are bloody amazing, sweetheart. You are the best fucking thing in my life and I love you. I love you more than I thought it was possible to love anyone. Please, sweetheart, you can't blame yourself because Ella made the decisions she did." He moved his hands to her face, wiping her tears with his thumbs. "Hermione, sweetheart, I'm so sorry I never knew about you earlier and I'm sorry your biological mother isn't the woman you want her to be, but you have three parents who adore you, my darling girl. Don't let the one who couldn't see what a gift you were take that away. I do not know what will come of you meeting her, perhaps she has changed, but even if she hasn't, your parents aren't going anywhere. I'm not going anywhere." he smirked at her "And I'm sure at some point that will seem like more of a threat than a promise."
She laughed slightly, clearly caught off guard before she dropped her head back onto his chest. "I'm sorry for freaking out, I...I've wanted to know who she is my whole life, " she said softly. "It wasn't that I didn't love my parents, I do but….." she trailed off helplessly, "I love you, Father. Promise me you won't go anywhere?" she said eventually.
"Oh, sweetheart, I promise I won't be going anywhere, even if I'm sure at some point you'll be wishing I would. You are my entire world, darling girl. Don't ever forget that."
Next to him, Narcissa had tears running down her face.
"That's not healthy, Father. We need to find you a hobby….or a date." he heard Hermione mumble into his chest, startling a laugh out of both him and Narcissa.
"Not you too!" he whined, making her smile.
"I love you," she whispered.
"I love you too, sweetheart," he murmured into her hair as kissed the top of her head, tightening his hold on her, wishing he could fix this mess.
Much later, his daughter asleep, curled up on his lap like a toddler rather than a teen, Narcissa handed him a whisky, sitting beside him with one of her own.
"I think I may hate her, '' she confessed, stroking a hand over Hermione's head as if she were a fractious baby.
"Who? Ella?"
"Yes. She made Hermione question whether she was worth loving, Severus. I… I can't even begin to imagine what she's feeling."
He sighed as he looked at Narcissa.
"From what Hermione's parents have told me she didn't have the easiest of childhoods. They love her but there is a disconnect due to her magic. Hopefully, if I can persuade Hermione to be more open that will right itself. I can also explain the things they find difficult to understand in a way she cannot. She had no friends, Cissa. She was the odd child who was too intelligent to be real and who did strange things and spent her childhood buried in a book. As much as it pains me to admit, I owe Longbottom, Potter and Weasley, they were her first friends. I don't think her questioning whether she is worth loving is purely down to Ella. I've never questioned our decision not to inform muggleborns of their magic until they're Hogwarts age until recently, but I now wonder whether she could have been saved so much hurt if someone had just explained it to her." He sighed, his eyes on his friend as she watched him intently, "She hasn't been sleeping, she got herself wound up into such a state over the end of term tests that she could do in her sleep. She volunteers to answer every question asked in classes to the point of obnoxiousness, not I've realised, because she needs everyone to know how intelligent she is but because she's shit scared someone is going to come along and tell her she doesn't belong here when she knows damn fine well she definitely doesn't belong in the muggle world. I think that she feels the need to prove her worth daily so that no one can ever question it. I had hoped to maybe deal with some of it over the summer but if we're adding Ella into the mix, god alone knows what state she'll be in."
Narcissa looked at him thoughtfully before her eyes travelled down to the still tear-stained girl sleeping on his chest.
"I've never thought about that," she said softly, "how strange it must be to not understand accidental magic. How big of an impact that must have. Maybe we need to discuss this with Lucius? Fudge listens to his advice, maybe we could get something up in front of the Wizengamot. I….I still think they're a danger to our world, Severus, maybe you can convince me otherwise but if we can stop a child feeling like Hermione feels, maybe it's worth trying."
He smiled at her slightly over Hermione's head. "I understand your fears, perhaps alongside that legislation, we need to consider the monitoring of homes for abuse and a modified vow that prevents parents and siblings from sharing information about our world. Currently, we just trust that they won't."
"It would make me feel better," Narcissa said with a shrug. "I wonder….would Hermione's parents be open to a discussion about it?"
He looked at her startled, "Perhaps. I think it is worth asking."
Narcissa hummed thoughtfully as she sipped her scotch.