A/N: Happy happy Monday! Thank you all so much for such kind words after last chapter. It meant the world to me. I really hope you all like this one too.
Jay's lips molded perfectly against Hailey's in a way that she didn't think she'd ever get used to. He was easily able to draw soft moans from her core as his hands danced along her sides both on top of and underneath her sweatshirt. The warmth coming from him erased the chill brought on by the breeze coming from Lake Michigan.
It was heaven.
For what felt like hours, they slowly moved together within the bed of the truck. Nothing was rushed as they were supported by the several blankets, sleeping bags, and pillows they'd piled around them. All Hailey could focus on was her boyfriend on top of her, next to her, and underneath her. The stars above blanketed them within their own little bubble where all she could hear were the soft breaths and moans coming from Jay just above the sound of the waves quietly hitting the sand.
Even when their kisses slowed down, they were at peace there in the beach parking lot. Jay still occasionally kissed her cheek or forehead or even her tattoo, and Hailey still reached up to kiss his bicep or jaw when she felt the need to feel his skin beneath hers. She liked him, and she needed him to know she'd meant it when she said it.
Wrapped in each other's arms, they began whispering about anything and everything under the moon. Jay told Hailey about his dream dog, and she told him about the apple pie her grandma used to make. He talked her through his first ever soccer game at college before she taught him all she'd learned in her color theory class she'd taken as an art credit. She listened intently to his fears about what was going to happen to his family after his mom died, and he never even blinked an eye when she recounted the first time her father hit her. He wiped the tears that had fallen down her cheeks, and she continuously squeezed his fingers when she felt them shaking in fear between the two of them.
Eventually, their conversations faded into soft appreciations for the other. Hailey had no hesitation in telling Jay that he was the first guy she'd ever felt safe enough to share any of their previous conversations with. When he smiled at her words, she tilted her head to the side and assured him he was the best looking out of all of them as well. The laugh he let out caused a flutter in her throat that just increased when he said he felt the exact same about her.
It was followed by quiet compliments from them both about their eyes or the way their hands felt or even the way Jay loved Hailey's new hair. He teased her that he would have loved the orange as well, but that he was happy she was happy. She'd never had someone tell her that's all they wanted for her, and it reinforced that this really was love.
With her parents, they always wanted more. Nothing she did ever seemed good enough. It should have been med school or law school. It should have been a 4.0 instead of a 3.8. She should have been faster in the diner or smiled more to the customers. She never really felt good enough, especially in her dad's eyes.
In turn, when growing up, her few boyfriends always expected more out of her as well. They wanted more sex or for her to be more available to them. Like her parents, sometimes they asked her to smile more. Some of them told her she wouldn't have to worry about school or studying – they were more than okay with supporting her as she stayed home with future kids. It was not something she was interested in. She had been in college; she didn't need to push her own dreams to the side for some babies she didn't even have yet. It wasn't that she didn't want a future family, but that she had her own list of goals to complete first.
Luckily for her, Jay let slip that he felt similarly without even knowing her own feelings. When they were letting the other into their past lives, he mentioned how he wanted to be a better dad than his own and to always support his kids no matter what they did. He was adamant that it would be way down the line once he felt established enough on his own, and it made her smile that their goals aligned.
Despite them just being goals, though, she couldn't help but let her mind wander and wonder what their future kids could look like. She imagined a little girl with Jay's brown hair and her own blue eyes and then a boy that was the spitting image of his father. She knew Jay would be a good father just based on his need to be better than his father and because he wanted to work with kids at his job. All of it actually made her wish they knew someone with a baby just for the chance to babysit together.
Eventually, Jay yawned and Hailey felt her own eyes sting with sleep, so she shifted on her side and got comfortable within her pillows. Jay silently lifted a hand to brush his thumb along her eyebrow for a few minutes before slipping it down her nose causing her to close her eyes. The last thing she remembered before falling asleep was the feeling of Jay's lips against her forehead as he murmured, "Sweet dreams, my Hailey."
Hailey woke to car doors slamming and loud voices surrounding her. Confused, she struggled to sit up and remember where she even was. Everything was still pitch black except for what seemed like headlights reflecting off the truck.
"Wha's happening?" Jay murmured as he pushed up against the bed of the truck. He grabbed Hailey's hand and squinted his eyes as he looked around.
"Are they alive? Are they in there?"
Hailey recognized that voice and turned toward it, trying to see where Vanessa was. She jumped, though, a second later when Mouse's face popped up right next to her outside the truck.
"Jesus Christ," he breathed as he looked them over.
"Mouse?" Jay asked.
"Yeah, man, what the hell?" Mouse said as he jumped down from the wheel. "They're here, they're alive," he yelled.
"Thank god," Vanessa said. She appeared a second later at the end of the truck as Mouse turned down the tailgate. He helped her jump up into the bed of the truck so she could crawl over to Hailey and hug her tightly.
"Oh," Hailey breathed.
When Vanessa pulled back, she flicked Hailey's forehead and yelled, "What were you thinking?"
Hailey lightly shoved her away and said, "What're you talking about?"
Mouse crawled up into the truck as well and said, "We didn't know where you two went."
"You didn't answer our texts or our calls. We thought you were dead," Vanessa said.
Jay rolled his eyes and said, "Really?"
"Yes, really," Mouse snapped, "What the hell? You don't just drive off to Michigan without telling anyone."
"It's really not a far ride," Jay said, "It was barely an hour and a half."
"I don't care," Vanessa said, meeting Hailey's eyes, "I thought I lost you."
Hailey let out a breath and said, "You didn't lose me. I just needed some air."
"And why is that air here in Michigan and not home in Chicago?" Vanessa asked.
"I…I don't know," Hailey quietly admitted, "I just needed to get out. Jay let me drive, so I drove. I didn't know where I was going."
Vanessa stared at her for a moment then looked down at her hands and silently nodded.
Jay glanced between the two of them before turning toward Mouse and saying, "Sorry, I should have texted you when we got here."
"Yeah, I'm your best friend," Mouse quickly retorted, reaching over to lightly punch Jay's shoulder. He softened right after, though, and gave Hailey a quick glance. Sighing, he said, "I'm just glad you're okay. We both are."
Vanessa nodded and added, "It was really scary."
"I'm sorry," Hailey said softly.
Vanessa shot her a small smile and whispered, "It's okay. I'm sorry too. It wasn't fair for Kim and I to drag you in that fight. We both know how you feel about screaming and…and it was unfair."
Hailey nodded and reached over to squeeze Vanessa's hand.
Jay rubbed Hailey's back then looked at Mouse and asked, "Where is Kim anyways? And Adam and Kevin?"
"Stayed back," Mouse answered with a sigh as he leaned against the side of the truck, "We all waited an hour after…" He looked at Vanessa and frowned.
"After Kim and I calmed down, which took a while," Vanessa finished with a deep breath, "She's still pretty upset with me, but we put it to the side so we could figure out where you two went. They figured they'd stay back just in case even though Mouse had your phones pinged almost immediately."
Hailey nodded and said quietly, "Makes sense."
Mouse stared at her for a moment before meeting Jay's eyes and raising an eyebrow. Jay shook his head then rubbed a hand over his face. "God," he groaned, "So, do we head out? What time even is it?"
"Just after three," Mouse answered, "And, personally, I don't want to head back. I'm exhausted."
"So you want to sleep here?" Jay asked.
"Why not?" Mouse replied, "You two have a nice little set up."
"I'm good with cuddling," Vanessa said.
Hailey laughed weakly and said, "Oh, really?"
Mouse nodded and pulled a blanket off of Jay. "I say we stay here till sunrise, then hit the road," he said, "Now scoot closer together up there. I'm fine if you spoon each other, but I refuse to hold Jay while he sleeps again."
Hailey snorted and asked, "Again?"
"It was one time on the bus ride home for a soccer game," Jay answered and tossed an extra pillow toward Mouse, "And he's being dramatic. He's the one who fell asleep on me."
"Details," Mouse said through a yawn. He laid on his side and waved his hand. "Night."
Jay smiled at him and shook his head before scooting closer to Hailey and laying down. He reached up to lightly tug her hair as he whispered, "Come back."
"One second," she laughed. She pulled off her sweatshirt for Vanessa and helped her get settled next to her under some of the blankets.
"So kind," Vanessa teased lightly. When Hailey laughed in response, she smiled then lowered her voice to say, "We really are sorry. I was worried about you not just because you were gone, but because of what you've gone through before. We love you and respect you."
"I know," Hailey whispered, "Listen, we'll figure it all out tomorrow once we sleep some and get home. How was the drive with Mouse?"
"Oh, you know, long," Vanessa said.
Hailey laughed softly and nodded. "Especially at night. Did you-"
"Ladies!" Mouse hissed through the dark, "You are two beautiful, wonderful people, but I am very tired. Please stop talking about me."
"Shut up," Vanessa groaned, but still laughed as she winked at Hailey. She squeezed her friend's hand then turned on her side away from her.
Hailey let out a breath before rolling to face Jay. He tossed an arm over her waist and kissed her forehead. "G'night, baby," he whispered.
"Goodnight," she replied back softly.
"Baby? We're saying 'baby' now?" Vanessa asked.
Hailey snorted and scooted closer to Jay. "I like it," she whispered.
He hummed and held her tightly. "Cool," he breathed, "I like it too. Just like I like you."
Hailey smiled against his chest and slipped her hands under his t-shirt.
She liked that too.
When they woke up with the sun, everyone agreed to stay around and watch the water on the tailgate before packing it all up and heading to breakfast. It was just some diner nearby, but Hailey thought it was perfect. There were a handful of tables filled with elderly couples talking to each other as if they did this every Sunday. The waitresses acted like they had worked their all their life. The coffee was hot and the food was delicious. It was everything she needed.
Life in the little town was slower and much more peaceful than Chicago; it reminded her of her feelings for Jay.
As they were heading back to their home, she thought back on what exactly her feelings for Jay were, and they all stemmed from how safe she felt while around him both physically and emotionally. They'd slept out in a parking lot in the back of his truck and not once did she think they shouldn't have done it. And while they were lying there, she truly felt like she could be vulnerable with him and receive nothing but support and kindness in return. He brought her peace even if they were in Chicago where the city noise kept her up at night. He helped remind her that it was okay to take a breath and look around at the world. There was good around her no matter where she was standing or what time of day it was – especially if Jay was by her side.
When they arrived back at the apartment building, Hailey let go of Jay's hand on their landing and said, "I'm gonna go talk to Kim."
He raised an eyebrow and stepped out of the way for Mouse and Vanessa. "You need me to come with you?" he asked.
"No, I've got it," she replied softly, "I won't be long; I just want to go check on her."
Vanessa glanced back at her before slipping into their apartment.
Jay nodded and said, "All right, but if you need anything-"
"I know," Hailey said, swinging her hand forward to brush against his arm, "Thank you."
Jay shot her a small smile and watched her turn to head up the stairs in the direction of Adam and Kevin's apartment.
She stopped at the closed door and took a deep breath. In the stillness of the car on the drive home, she had considered what she wanted to say to Kim. She wanted to apologize and explain where she'd gone the night before, but she also knew that what had happened with Vanessa was a two-way street and that Kim wasn't completely innocent in some of the deep cuts she'd made.
In truth, all she wanted was her friends back. She couldn't imagine taking any step forward with Jay without them by her side. They had been her everything for the past four years now, and she wanted the same for the next four years. They'd become a family and some of the only people Hailey felt anything resembling love for. They needed to be okay.
Knocking on the door, she took a step back and bit her lip. She'd just assumed that Kim would be there, so if she wasn't, she wasn't quite sure what she would do.
The door opened a second later and Kevin nodded at her. "Hey," he quietly greeted, "You good?"
Hailey smiled and nodded. "I'm good," she replied, "Kim here?"
"Yeah, she's in Adam's room," Kevin answered and stepped back, "She was real worried about you."
Hailey nodded again and looked over at Adam's closed door. "Yeah," she breathed, "I'm worried about her too."
Kevin lightly hit her back then said, "It'll work out."
"Thanks," Hailey breathed before heading over to Adam's room. She knocked on the door softly then cracked it open to whisper, "Kim?"
Both Adam and Kim looked up from watching a movie on his bed. Adam smiled at her and said, "Look who's home. When'd you get back?"
"Like five minutes ago, if that," Hailey said, "I haven't even gone back to my place yet."
Adam hummed in understanding then pushed off the bed. He kissed the top of Kim's head before heading out of the room, squeezing Hailey's shoulder on the way.
Kim rubbed her eyes and whispered, "Hey."
"Hi," Hailey said, "Can I…" She gestured toward the bed then wrapped her arms around her middle.
Kim nodded and adjusted the blankets over herself.
Hailey let out a sigh as she went to sit on the edge of the bed. She rubbed her hand over the comforter then said softly, "We went to Michigan. Jay gave me the keys and told me to drive, so I drove. We were going to watch the sunset, you know, and so that was my goal. I headed east and suddenly we were at a beach along Lake Michigan."
Kim nodded again and, without looking up, asked, "Was it pretty?"
Hailey smiled and dug her phone out of her pocket. "The prettiest," she said before scooting closer to show Kim all the pictures she'd taken, including the ones of the fireworks and Jay.
A ghost of a smile crossed Kim's face and she asked, "And was it fun?"
"Yeah," Hailey said, "It was a nice break. A good breath of fresh air."
"I bet," Kim said, passing her phone back. She met Hailey's eyes and her face fell. "I'm sorry," she whispered.
Hailey first began shaking her head then shrugged with a sigh. "I'm sorry too," she said, "I'm the one who started that whole thing."
"And I'm the one who took it too far," Kim said, "And then I'm the one who followed you two into your apartment and kept screaming at her."
Frowning, Hailey lightly set her hand on Kim's knee and asked, "Did you talk at all last night after I left?"
Kim scoffed and said, "Not really. Not like we should have done. I…I feel bad about the whole thing, but she…she embarrassed me and took it too far. I know I crossed a line too. It was more like a truce in the moment."
"And now that we're out of the moment?"
"I don't know."
Hailey slowly nodded and took a deep breath. "Do you think you two can make it?"
Kim smiled slightly and glanced to the closed door before saying, "How many times did either of you say that to me about me and Adam?"
Finally, Hailey laughed and hugged Kim tightly. Squeezing her eyes shut, she whispered, "I'm sorry I ran away."
Kim shook her head and whispered back, "I'm sorry I couldn't handle a joke then got in a giant fight."
"Hey, it was a poor joke," Hailey said as she sat back and brushed a hand over the side of Kim's hair.
Kim shrugged and looked down at her hands. She seemed to mull something over for a moment before saying quietly, "Truth?"
"Course," Hailey breathed.
"He asked me what it was," Kim said so softly that Hailey almost missed it, "So I told him and…and he's not against it; he just doesn't want to do it now while Vanessa and I are still fighting about it."
Hailey smiled slightly and said, "That's good, right?"
"I guess," Kim sighed and laid back against the pillows, "I hate that it took a fight with my best friend to get it, though. Better be some damn good sex."
Hailey snorted and laid next to her. "It'd make Vanessa proud," she said.
"I know," Kim said, "We should make up soon so she could coach me through it."
"Don't make it weird," Hailey said, closing her eyes.
"Tired?" Kim asked.
Hailey hummed and kicked her shoes off.
"A nap sounds great," Kim said. She rolled onto her side and said, "Truck bed wasn't comfortable?"
"It wasn't bad," Hailey answered, "Jay's a good pillow."
"You two sleep together?"
"Nah, the position was a little awkward, we just made out for a long time. Maybe we'll do it next time we're in a sleeping bag together."
Kim laughed and tossed a blanket over the two of them. "Night, Hails."
"G'night, Kim."
Sleep came easily to Hailey, which made her toss and turn that night. Despite Vanessa and Kim both wanting to move past their argument, there was still tension in the air the rest of the day. Hailey tried brushing it off by watching TV with Jay on her couch after her nap, but it all still irked her.
Besides the nap, it's what kept her up that night. And then the next. And then the next.
She hated fighting, but she especially hated it when it was her friends. Vanessa and Kim were slowly letting each other back in their lives, it just didn't feel fast enough in her eyes. They danced around the problems and were civil, but the underlying tension made everything feel awkward. Even Adam was acting different – he wouldn't even look Vanessa in the eyes when they were all together.
On her fourth night of no sleep, she flipped over in bed and stared at Jay. He was completely passed out on his stomach while facing away from her. She could hear him breathing softly and wondered what he was dreaming about. He'd had dinner at his parents house that night and brought her back a container of stew for lunch the next day. Maybe he was thinking of that or maybe it was something different entirely. He'd said he had a nice time, and she was grateful for that. It was always nice when he came home with a smile on his face, but she still worried about what he was hiding underneath all that.
She reached out to lightly run her finger down his spine, connecting a line of freckles on the way. Smiling, she scooted closer to him and pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades. Somehow, his skin was always soft. It also always smelt like whiskey. She didn't know how he did it, but he smelt like home. She'd been in his shower; he didn't have some fancy soap. She wondered if it was just what she associated with him. Maybe being in love with him created this unique smell for him.
She rolled her eyes at herself then laid back on her pillow. That was ridiculous. This wasn't some fantasy novel.
She needed to get better at understanding love. Yes, she figured she was new at this and should cut herself some slack, but still. Love was a feeling, not a smell.
Staring up at her ceiling, she thought of Adam and Kim. They said they loved each other a lot, but she never heard Kim talk about what Adam smelled like. It just reiterated that Hailey was being stupid.
Kim did talk about Adam's hugs and his jokes and how much he loved making fettuccini alfredo. She said she liked his eyes and running her fingers through his hair. When he'd let his beard get a little longer, she would jokingly complain about how it felt against her throat, but wouldn't be able to stop smiling about it the entire time. She claimed he was the only person she'd ever 'made love' with even if Hailey and Vanessa had teased her endlessly over using such a phrase.
Making love sounded so…gross. Well, not gross, just…too much like a storybook.
She did like having sex with Jay. It was fun, and it made her feel good. Physically and emotionally. Maybe the emotional part was what made sex bigger than just sex. She didn't know, but maybe she needed to know so that she could figure everything out with Jay.
Giving him another glance, she rolled away and grabbed her phone off her side table. She was embarrassed to even do it, and she prayed that Vanessa and Kim would never find out, but she was curious, and it was pushing 2am.
difference between sex and making love
"Have Sex" is a phrase that describes physical connection… "Making love" is all of this, but also emphasizes the deep emotional connection, affection and shared bond that develops between caring-
"Oh, hell no," she whispered.
lovers.
She hated that word.
In no world would she ever, ever describe Jay as her lover. No. That was an old people word used to describe anyone who had sex. It was a teasing word.
If she were to ever hear Kim describe Adam as her lover, Hailey would surely never let her live it down. She absolutely refused to ever say that word aloud.
Boyfriend? Yes.
Good in bed? Yes.
Hot man? Yes.
Neighbor? Yes.
Lover? Never.
"Babe?"
Hailey quickly shut her phone off and tossed it off the bed.
"Babe," Jay repeated and sat up. Rubbing the sleep from his face, he sleepily asked, "What's going on? You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, of course," Hailey answered quickly, "Come on, let's go back to sleep."
Before she could guide Jay back down to his pillow, he gently pushed her hands away and asked, "Why're you awake?"
Hailey met his eyes then shrugged.
Jay smirked briefly before it faded, and he said, "Hail. Talk to me. You okay? Did you have a nightmare or something? Are you sick?"
"No, no," she sighed, "I'm fine."
Jay raised an eyebrow and said, "Really?"
She couldn't lie to him. Not when he was staring at her with his hair all messed up and the blankets pooled at his waist.
Damn him for being cute, and damn her for having real, true feelings for him.
"Just been having a hard time sleeping," she quietly admitted, "Ever since we got back from the beach the other day. I don't know why."
Jay nodded and grabbed her hand. "Was it your back maybe? I could have gotten you some of that cream again."
A smile flickered on Hailey's face at the thought and Kim's crude comment the couple months before when Jay had first given her that muscle cream. Instead of making her laugh, though, it shot a pang through her heart.
She looked down at their hands and shook her head. "I don't need that," she whispered, "My back's fine. Well, it was a little sore the other day, but that back rub you gave me helped."
Jay nodded and slipped his hand to her lower back just like the few days before.
Hailey closed her eyes for a moment then met his gaze and said, "I think it's the fight."
Jay frowned and nodded again. "Yeah," he breathed, "You said it brought up some stuff. I…I'm sorry. I didn't realize it'd still be keeping you up at night."
"Hey, it's not your fault," Hailey said softly. She set her hand on his cheek and said, "I didn't think it would either."
Jay's eyes scanned her face before he murmured, "Come here," and tugged her into a hug.
The second his warm skin was pressed to hers, she closed her eyes and relaxed. His hand continued rubbing against her back as her breathing slowed down. He easily made her feel safe and forget about her dad and her past. She couldn't remember ever feeling as protected as she did when she was in Jay's arms.
This felt a lot more like love than sex did.
She buried her face in his throat and wrapped her arms tightly around him. He felt big against her like he could block anyone from ever hurting her or touching her again. She could feel his heart thump against her and focused on it as her eyes began drooping.
Jay was like magic in the way that he could get her to calm down. It was his superpower.
He hummed as her weight settled against him before laying back with her on his chest. "Staying all night," he whispered and ran his fingers through her hair, "Not going anywhere."
She hummed back because she believed him with her whole heart. She knew he wasn't going to leave her just like how he'd never yell at her or raise a hand toward her.
It gave her enough peace to finally fall asleep.
The soft thunder woke her up paired with rain pattering against the window. She didn't even want to open her eyes and wished she could stay in her warm spot all day, but then she could hear her alarm go off and groaned at the prospect of going to work.
Jay shifted underneath her then mumbled, "The hell's your phone?"
She hummed and finally opened her eyes.
"Where's your phone?" Jay repeated sleepily, "I can't find it. Your alarm needs to stop."
Hailey sighed and reluctantly sat up to look at her side table only to be met with nothing. It took her a second of staring at the table before she breathed, "Oh." She quickly pushed out of bed to find it on the other side of the room and turned off the alarm.
"How'd it get there?" Jay asked.
Hailey waved her hand and unlocked it. She winced at her early morning search then deleted the tab on making love. She hadn't wanted Kim and Vanessa to find out what she'd looked up; she hadn't even considered how she'd feel when fully awake and looking at it. Rolling her eyes, she set her phone on her dresser and said, "Wanna shower with me?"
Jay raised an eyebrow and asked, "Are you sure you're okay? Last night was…it was something, huh? You were awake and on your phone and threw it and…and I'm worried about you."
"Jay," she said softly and crawled on the bed. Settling herself on his lap, she set her hands on the sides of his throat and said, "I'm okay, really? Stuff just got dragged up. You helped me through it-"
"I literally hugged you and that's it," Jay said quietly, "Don't you think we should talk about it?"
"More than we have?" Hailey asked, "Jay."
"Hailey," he replied easily, a slight smirk crossing his face.
She sighed because he was right. They'd had conversations about her dad and growing up, but last night when she was struggling to sleep and wrap her mind around her feelings toward him? No. They didn't talk then.
Brushing her thumbs over his jaw, she took a deep breath then quietly admitted, "I really don't understand why it's been coming up, but I do know that I feel safe when I'm with you, and you help the thoughts from taking over. Maybe I need to work harder on dealing with those thoughts as they come, but for now, having you hold my hand and tell me you're not leaving me, that's more than enough. You're a really good man for doing what no one else has done before. Is that really a bad thing that I'm focusing just on that?"
"Of course not," Jay breathed. He tucked her hair behind her ear and said, "Thank you for telling me that."
She shot him a small smile and nodded.
He kissed her forehead and said, "I'm not leaving you. Not again."
"I believe you," she said softly.
Jay smiled and kissed her quickly. "You're amazing," he said, "And you're brave." He held up her wrist and rubbed his thumb over her tattoo. "Best person I know," he added.
She laughed softly and said, "Laying it on thick."
Jay chuckled as he kissed her again. "I mean it," he said, "And I mean it when I say we'll figure this all out. I know it's your past, but it's our future. We'll get it to work, I know we will."
Hailey nodded and said, "I know. Thank you." She brushed her hand over his hair then reached to grab his glasses off the table. Putting him on his face with a laugh, she said, "That added like five minutes, maybe even ten to my morning schedule. What if I'm late now?"
"Then I say we shower together for efficiency," Jay said.
Hailey laughed and squealed quietly as he got out of bed and tossed her over his shoulder.
She didn't know why a fight between her friends was messing with her mind so much, but she did know that Jay had been right when he said they would figure it all out. She had no doubt that with him, she wasn't going to be lost for much longer - if at all.
Work was long and tiring. Hailey knocked into a table and spilt a few solutions. It was nothing major, it just meant she needed to stay back longer to clean everything up, so she wasn't getting back to the apartment until after dinner.
She couldn't wait for the day that she could leave and become an actual forensic scientist. She was over being someone's lab assistant and sorting through endless tasks that felt meaningless. She was sure they had some actual purpose, it was just really hard to see through all the numbers and formulas and strong smells that filled her lungs day after day.
To her surprise, when she reached her landing, there was a lot of cheering coming from Jay's apartment. She almost ignored it and headed to her own door, but then she heard Kim celebrating something and knew she couldn't just walk away.
Hailey knocked on the guys' door before pushing it open and saying, "Hello?"
No one looked up.
Vanessa, Kim, Adam, Mouse, and Jay were all huddled around the living room staring at some soccer game on the TV. Pizza boxes littered the kitchen counter while empty beer bottles were scattered on the floor.
She laughed slightly and said louder, "Hey!"
Jay looked over his shoulder and smiled wide. "Hey! It's Hailey!"
Again, no one else looked away from the TV.
Hailey tried figuring out which teams were playing, but then the screen flashed and she realized they weren't watching a game – they were playing a game.
"Yes, yes, yes!" Vanessa screamed and high-fived Mouse.
"You suck!" Kim yelled and fell back against Adam's legs.
He rubbed her head from his spot on the recliner and said, "We'll get them next time."
Hailey held back a smile and crossed her arms.
Jay pushed off the recliner and stepped over Mouse to lightly jog to the kitchen. "Hey," he said softly and kissed her cheek quickly, "How was work?"
She smiled and tilted her head to the side as she said, "Long. What's going on here?"
"Oh, just hanging out," Jay answered, "Rainy days call for video games, didn't you know that?"
Hailey hummed and looked over at Kim and Vanessa laughing with each other. Smiling even wider, she asked, "What happened there?"
Jay followed her gaze and said, "We got sick of them fighting, and I knew you felt the same way. Kevin suggested we stick them in a box together until they make up, but we didn't have a box, so we settled on having them duke it out in Fifa. It worked."
"Ah, nice," Hailey said through a laugh, "Where's Kevin anyways?"
"Work," Jay said. He opened one of the pizza boxes and put two slices on a plate. "You hungry?" he asked.
"Yeah, I should go change first, though," Hailey answered.
"Or not," Jay said. He slid the plate across the counter as he sat on a bar stool. "You look fine. It's just our friends."
Hailey snorted and gestured to her outfit that was stained with some of the solutions she'd spilt earlier along with the stew he'd given her that she'd dropped on herself during lunch and her hair that was starting to get frizzy from the humidity. "This isn't cute," she said.
"It really doesn't matter," Jay chuckled, "Just have fun with us." He held up a slice of pizza and said, "Eat and drink. We miss you."
"It's been a single work day," Hailey laughed. She took a bite of the pizza he was holding then added, "Plus, I was texting you at lunch."
Jay hummed then bit into the pizza himself. After he swallowed, he said, "I have clothes you could borrow."
"Babe, I'll come back after changing," Hailey said, brushing the backs of her fingers against his cheek, "How many beers did you have?"
"Just three," he answered quickly, "So it's barely a buzz."
"Ah, okay, sure," Hailey replied. She smiled at him and pecked his lips before taking a step backwards. "I'll be right back," she said.
"I'll come with you," Jay said, standing up.
Hailey raised an eyebrow and asked, "Oh, really?"
"Yeah, I've got time. They still have like ten minutes before it'll be my turn. Maybe you can be on my team too," Jay explained. He set a hand on her back and walked her out of the apartment and into her own. As he followed her to her bedroom, he asked, "Are you good at Fifa?"
"I've never played," Hailey answered. She set her bag down at her desk then slipped her shoes off. Pulling off her damp work clothes, she said, "I'm not really a video game person. Maybe you could teach me?"
"In the middle of a tournament?" Jay asked as he sat on her bed to watch her, "I don't know if that's a smart idea."
Hailey laughed and rolled her eyes. "All right," she said, "I don't mind. Could I sit on your lap while you play?"
"Oh, for sure," Jay said, "No question about that."
Hailey smiled and unclasped her bra. As she turned toward her dresser to grab out a pair of joggers and Jay's red t-shirt she'd stolen, she asked, "Have you always played video games?"
"Yeah, they're fun," Jay answered, "Kev, Adam, Mouse, and I used to play on Wednesday nights when we were in college. It was a tradition."
Once she was dressed, Hailey turned back toward him and pulled her hair from its ponytail. "What would you play?" she asked.
Jay watched her pick up her hairbrush then put a hand out as he said, "Fifa, of course, but also Call of Duty and Rocket League."
"Yeah?" Hailey asked, looking at his hand.
"Give me the brush," he said softly.
Hailey smiled slightly and passed him over the brush before sitting next to him. Closing her eyes as he began slowly brushing through her tangled hair, she asked, "What's Rocket League?"
"Soccer with cars."
"You guys sure love soccer."
"It's the best sport."
"Adam agrees with that?"
"Adam can go to hell."
Hailey laughed and shook her head, wincing when it caused Jay to accidentally tug at her hair.
"Sorry," he murmured and lightly grabbed the back of her head. He slowed down while brushing her hair and said softly, "This okay?"
"Yeah," Hailey breathed, "Thank you."
Jay hummed and continued brushing her hair for another couple minutes before setting the brush down and saying, "I think that's okay."
Hailey ran a hand through her hair then turned to face him. "Feels perfect to me," she said.
Jay smiled and nodded. He reached over to brush his fingers through it too before nodding again to himself and saying, "Nice job, Jay."
Hailey snorted another laugh and pushed his chest. "You're such a dork," she said while standing up. Smiling down at him, she pulled his hand and said, "Come on, my buzzed up boyfriend, let's go hang out with our friends and finish that pizza. I could use a beer too."
Jay smiled back at her and followed her out of the apartment. While she grabbed her plate of pizza off his counter, he returned to his spot on the recliner just in time to swap controllers with Vanessa.
Hailey watched as Vanessa shifted on the ground to lay next to Kim and coach her through the beginning of the game. She smiled to herself and let out a breath.
A weight felt like it was lifted from her chest, and she realized she was going to be able to sleep that night even if Jay wasn't holding her in his arms.
It wasn't necessarily the fighting that had kept her up at night; it was the thought of losing her family again. When she was younger, fights always created obvious rifts between everyone within their household, and she hated it more than she hated all the screaming. All she ever wanted was to feel loved and important, and if the house was filled with tension, she didn't actually feel like that.
Things were different now.
Now, she had friends that truly cared about each other. They might have fought over silly stuff like sex and what to eat for dinner, but they showed up every single day.
She did feel loved and important now – not just by Vanessa and Kim, but by the guys too. Mouse never hesitated to help her with anything she could possibly need. Kevin would sit and talk with her for hours about anything that crossed either of their minds. Even Adam would share a beer with her while asking her for advice about Kim before making her laugh over literally anything.
And then there was Jay.
Who just brushed her hair for her and went with her on an impromptu trip to Michigan and held her whenever she needed and took her on dates and introduced her to his family and was trying to teach her that love was real.
He certainly made her feel important.
Her new family was better than her biological family. She was happy here.
After finishing her pizza and wiping her mouth, she walked over to the living room to sit on Jay's lap. She teasingly kissed his cheek and dragged her finger down his chest before taking a sip of his beer. It distracted him enough that Kim was able to score a goal in their game. While he groaned loudly and blamed her, she just laughed and knew he thought it was funny as well.
It brought a smile to her face as she turned in his lap to ask Vanessa about her day. For whatever reason, Kim answered for her and began ignoring the game despite her recent success. Together, the three of them began slipping out of the video game and into their own conversation just like they would have the week before.
Their argument was over and in the past, and Hailey truly believed that. She never could have said the same about her family and the grudges that were held for months over the dumbest things.
It was just another reason as to why this family – her chosen family – was much better than the one she'd grown up with.
This was home.
This was real love.
A/N: What do you think? :)