A.N.- Grad school has thoroughly kicked my ass but I really missed this series (and writing generally.) I couldn't think of how I would have wanted to write the 'grown ups' conversation over a nightcap, so I'm going to pick up with Aaron's perspective the next morning. Poor kids had it rough that last day, and the insecurities resulting from those events do indeed have consequences for the subsequent days. Hotch and Mads are more similar than they think…
Warnings: same as the blanket warning for this story.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Aaron woke up the next morning, and as he rolled onto his back, he remembered exactly what had transpired the previous evening. The more he remembered, the more he wanted to cringe at himself- what was he thinking?! He was lucky Dave put up with him, really, and quickly decided that he would be on his best behavior- he could learn, he could be good, Dave should keep wanting him around. He ignored the voice in his head that wanted to remind him of every other time he tried this- he eventually ended up cracking. Subsequently, he would then find himself in a mountain of trouble, a larger magnitude than he would have found himself in if he didn't try to be the perfect protege.
He didn't know if he had to be dressed at breakfast, but he figured that he'd err on the side of caution. He was explicitly told not to bring any suits or dress pants, so he pulled on a pair of jeans and a plain undershirt, in addition to the FBI sweatshirt he had 'stolen' from Dave (he didn't actually steal it, it was what Dave gave him to sleep in the night that he first punished Aaron in his home rather than in the office. It was an emotional and tumultuous event, but the sweatshirt felt undeniably safe.) Socks and sneakers followed, and a now-dressed Aaron found himself making his way towards the kitchen, where voices seemed to be concentrated.
"Good morning," he pleasantly greeted the room as he stepped in the kitchen, immediately going towards the barstools at the counter where Ness was seated, watching Cass and Dave prepare something for breakfast.
"How'd you sleep, sweetheart?" Ness asked, and Hotch felt his face heat up at the term of endearment.
"Well, thank you," he answered back politely, trying to keep any stammering to a minimum, "what's for breakfast?" This was small talk, Aaron could do small talk- small talk was the only safe way to talk to his father, though it was rarely safe either.
"Waffles!" Cass called out from where she was apparently manning the waffle maker, then added, "with a lot of different berry compotes, which is what Dave is working on now."
"Sounds good," he said in a small voice, and then picked at his cuticles as the room fell into a silence that seemed comfortable enough for the other occupants, but was excruciating for Hotch. A smaller hand covered his own and held it, pulling it away from the cuticles of the other hand that he was picking at.
"That's really not good for you sweetie," Ness said in a soft tone, "do you want something to fidget with instead?"
"No," he managed to stammer out, "I'm uh, I'm good. Sorry about that." Then, he returned to silence, this time with both hands palm down on his legs. He cast his gaze downwards, missing the look Ness shot Dave.
"Alright," Ness said, "let me know if that changes. We have about a billion things laying around that are safe to fidget with, it helps Maddy actually focus and stay engaged." Of course they do, Aaron found himself thinking, and the vitriol he could hear behind his own thought nearly made him wince. That confirmed to him, though, that he shouldn't take Ness up on that offer- if there was anything Aaron learned about Maddy the previous day, it was that she was a trouble magnet. He had to keep his distance (a polite distance, of course) if he wanted to avoid further issues and show Dave he could be good.
"You're quiet this morning," he heard Rossi softly murmur to him, concern evident in his voice, and Hotch felt a surge of guilt. He could come clean, but he wanted to show his boss and surrogate father that he could be well behaved, and telling Dave his plans felt manipulative. Instead, he shrugged, and answered in an equally soft voice.
"Just tired, I guess," he was proud of the way his voice stayed even through his lie, though Dave's raised eyebrow suggested the older profiler wasn't buying it. At least his mentor didn't push, though, instead gesturing that Aaron should take a seat as a plate of waffles joined the toppings already at the table. It was very obvious, though, that someone was missing. "Where's Maddy?" he asked, sitting down with a poorly-concealed wince- yeah, he was still feeling thoroughly chastised from the previous day, but it only served as a reminder to be on his best behavior now.
"Still sleeping, probably," Cass said with a slight smile, "she hadn't been sleeping well this week, last night was probably the first full night of sleep she's had in a while." Aaron nodded, he could understand that- in fact, last night was his first full night of sleep in a few days, too, as he was feeling increasingly anxious about this trip. "Speak of the devil," Cass said with a smile, looking towards the doorway where Maddy stood, glowering at that comment, though the look was softened by her bedhead and the pajamas she still sported. Did Ness and Dave get those sweatshirts at the same time? he wondered, noticing that it matched his own. Being dressed the same way as your cousin (at least functionally) was a little on the embarrassing side, but he couldn't deny that the worn sweatshirts were soft and comforting. And based on how much trouble Maddy found herself in the day before, which made him seem like an angel in comparison, she could probably use the comfort.
"Come sit down, sweet girl," Cass patted the seat next to her and Maddy only glared further; Cass didn't respond verbally, instead choosing to raise a sole eyebrow until Maddy looked away as she approached the chair looking a little apprehensive- her mannerisms brought forth a small panic in Hotch, who was wondering just how badly she had been punished the previous evening to be looking at a chair like that, and Cass didn't seem like she was about to yield, and was that being too mean to Maddy?
The intensity of his thoughts surprised him, in addition to how protective he suddenly found himself over the younger woman- especially given that, not even a half hour prior, he wanted to avoid her given the amount of trouble she seemed to find herself in. He still wasn't sure that she wasn't a bad influence, but should she really be that apprehensive to sit?
He didn't realize he was glaring until he felt Dave's hand on his knee and turned his head, feeling his breathing even out (he hadn't even realized that his breathing had changed until that moment) and some tension bleeding from his body. Dave tilted his head to the side, and Hotch knew it to be the profiler's non-verbal way of asking 'are you okay?' Swallowing, he nodded- he was pretty sure that criticizing how Dave's best friend and her wife seemed to be too harsh on Maddy would get him into trouble, and he was trying to show that he could be good. Dave looked at him a moment longer, seemingly searching his face for something; Hotch didn't know if his mentor found what he was looking for or not, but he gestured to the food on the table as he took a waffle and topped it with a mixed berry compote.
Still feeling a little queasy, Hotch took a waffle as well and topped it with a generous amount of strawberry compote and fresh strawberries. Even though the toppings were enticing, he found himself struggling to finish even half of the waffle. He tried to ignore the concerned look Dave was giving him as he set down his silverware, dropping his hands to pick at his cuticles. Then, remembering that Ness had scolded him for that habit not even an hour prior, he made his hands still and awkwardly hoped for the meal to end soon.
A few minutes later, he heard Dave sigh in a way that made his pulse jump- he didn't think he had done anything that should land him in trouble, but he knew that sigh. Sure enough, a moment later, Hotch felt his mentor's hand gently land on his knee, commanding his attention. Trying to be respectful, he shakily looked up to meet his mentor's eyes. A look of concern crossed Dave's face, and Hotch dropped his gaze once more.
"We're going to go talk for a moment if you ladies can handle the cleanup," Dave said, though the words sounded distant to Hotch. However, he grasped that he was in trouble, and frantically tried to sort through memories, needing to know what he did wrong. Aaron could sort of hear Ness's response to Dave but he wasn't paying attention to anything but the rushing in his ears, and the next thing he knew he was in the bedroom he had been using and there was a very concerned Dave looking at him.
"You back with me," his mentor asked incredibly softly, and Aaron gave a tremulous nod. "Good," Dave said, "that's good. Do you know what that was about?"
Hotch nodded, feeling embarrassed but still trying to be as agreeable as possible.
"Can you tell me what it was?" Dave asked another question, still with a painfully gentle tone.
Aaron was conflicted- on one hand, he wanted to prove he was good but, on the other hand, he was positive the reason for his panic attack would anger his mentor.
"I won't be mad," Dave said, as if reading his surrogate son's thoughts, "you're not in any trouble, I promise. And no answer to that question will lead to any trouble."
"No answer?" Hotch asked, hiding his nerves behind a joking facade.
"Within reason," Rossi amended his statement. Hotch sighed and braced himself for the worst, but he was trying to be good.
"I just…" he stammered, "well, I…" he paused for a moment, trying to get his thoughts together, "should she have been that nervous to sit down?" he asked in a rush, then ducked his head so he couldn't see the anger that would soon be on his mentor's face.
To Hotch's surprise, though, Dave just chuckled a little bit. "Yeah kid," he said, an arm still heavy around Aaron's shoulders, "she's alright. Just found herself in a lot of trouble yesterday."
"So did I but I wasn't that nervous this morning," Hotch pressed forward, his past dictating that he couldn't let anyone else he knew be hurt by a parent-figure. Dave's arm shifted, and then his mentor was rubbing his back as he gently encouraged Hotch to breathe.
"She found herself in a lot more trouble than you managed to," Dave said, "and that is all I'm gonna say on the matter." Hotch supposed that was fair, he wouldn't like other people knowing the details of when he was facing consequences from Rossi.
"She's not… They're not…" Hotch tried to ask the question he needed to, but the question that was the most accusatory and thus he was trying to avoid it.
"They're not abusing her," Dave assured him, "trust me, this was an anomaly." Aaron wanted to believe him, but still… Dave sighed, and Aaron listened as his mentor explained that he'd known Ness, Maddy, and Cass for a while and they all loved each other, they weren't unnecessarily harsh on the 'kid,' and then pointed out that Maddy has repeatedly consented to that type of relationship with Ness. Hotch felt his apprehension wane, though it didn't disappear entirely; he supposed that would come with time, and more evidence that Dave had the full story. He slowly nodded, then took a moment to make sure he was breathing correctly.
"Let's go back?" he suggested, still nervous but needing to see for himself.
-o-o-o-o-o-
He probably shouldn't have been so worried, he acknowledged to himself as he found himself in the doorway of the living room watching the interactions of a very loving family. All three women were seated on the same couch, with Maddy sandwiched in between her surrogate parents. Maddy was leaning a little on her hip, yes, but she was also cuddled up to both women, and Ness and Cass were being so gentle towards Maddy.
Ness was the first to look towards the doorway, and smiled gently at Aaron. "Don't be shy," she said, "c'mon in." Dave appeared behind him and gently nudged him forward, and the two were soon seated on the adjacent couch. "We were just talking about what we should do today," Ness explained, and Aaron got the feeling she was being intentionally gentle with him but he couldn't bring himself to mind, "I think it would be good to get outside," she explained further.
"You thinking of anywhere in particular?" Rossi asked.
"Central Park is a classic for a reason," Ness shrugged, "and fresh air is good for the soul."
-o-o-o-o-o-
They ended up taking the subway to the park, and then spent the rest of the morning walking around. The park was beautiful, but Aaron couldn't help but remain hypervigilant in his observations of Maddy. Over the course of the rest of the morning, he was eventually able to relax, having seen the openly loving way that Ness and Cass treated Maddy. Maddy, in turn, was seemingly always plastered to one of their sides; she didn't seem to harbor any resentment towards the other women.
They got lunch from a hot dog vendor and continued to meander around the park as they ate. It was nice, and oddly peaceful, especially compared to the day before. Maddy too seemed to be on her best behavior, though Hotch would be seriously concerned if she managed to ignore the lessons of the previous day which had clearly lingered with her.
Once they had finished their hot dogs and walked around a bit more, they found a man selling ice cream and they each got something. The ice cream vendor was in a peaceful part of the park with lots of benches, and so they sat down to eat the frozen treat- well, the 'grown ups' sat down. Aaron wasn't really feeling his spanking from the previous day anymore, but it was clear that Maddy still was, and he didn't want her to feel weird about standing. Besides, he had to confirm that she was actually happy- she certainly seemed to be, but he could finally relax once he asked her herself.
"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, a cup of rocky road ice cream in his hand.
"Yeah," Maddy shrugged and took a bite from her own cherry vanilla ice cream, "why wouldn't I be?"
Aaron truly tried to put his concern into words, but given that his concern involved the word 'spanking,' and he was still resistant to saying that word out loud… He felt his face heat but, fortunately, Maddy seemed to know what he was trying to say and smirked.
"I'm fine," she said, "really. Yesterday was just a really bad day for me, but…" she trailed off, shrugging and looking towards Ness and Cass, "I needed it, I guess."
"You… needed it?!" Hotch asked incredulously.
"You can't tell me that you don't feel better after crying it out over your mentor's knee," her matter of fact tone caused Hotch to blush further, and Maddy smirked again before taking a more serious tone, "I earned every bit of what I got yesterday, and I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if I hadn't had the… help," at that, she made a face and continued, "I'm fine, really."
"So you're not…"
"Being abused?" Maddy snorted, "hell no, I know what that feels like and this is not that."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I-" Aaron stammered in response to Maddy's revelation.
"It's fine, it was a long time ago," she waved it off casually, but he felt like he should let her know that she wasn't alone in that.
"Time doesn't mean healing, and it doesn't make whatever happened to you 'fine,'" he said, "I know what that feels like too. The two looked at each other for a long moment, and Aaron could tell that he'd be friends with this woman for a lifetime.
-o-o-o-o-o-
"You on your best behavior too?" Maddy asked as they walked back to the subway, trailing behind their mentors.
"Yeah," Hotch grimaced, "I need to show Dave I'm capable of listening." Maddy narrowed her eyes as she took in the statement, searching Aaron's face for something unknown to him before shrugging.
"That's relatable," she said after a pause, "plus I'm pretty sure I'll be plenty sore for a long while," she absentmindedly rubbed her ass for a second as she spoke.
"Are you sure you-" Hotch began to ask, but Maddy cut him off.
"I promise, I'm not being abused and I'm fine. To be honest, I probably earned more than I actually got, but Ness and Cass aren't going to hurt me," she said, then added, in a mumble, "it took me a long time to believe that, too, so please don't keep questioning it."
"Oh," he said, startled, "sorry, I didn't mean…" he mentally castigated himself for the oversight, he should have known, he once felt very similarly as well.
"It's alright," Maddy shot Aaron a small smile, "I appreciate the concern, but you'll see at home that things really are okay," she reached for his hand and squoze it; while ordinarily Aaron would have yanked his hand away, he found that he didn't mind it from Maddy and it was, actually, very assuring.
-o-o-o-o-o-
He suspected that Maddy's increased tactile nature was to benefit both of them- to show Aaron that she was okay, and to help her settle herself. She was always glued to either Ness or Cass, to the point where Cass teasingly asked if she had a shadow. Maddy had turned pink but Cass was quick to reassure her that she didn't mind, and wrapped an arm around the younger woman before kissing the top of her head.
He might have also been seeing things, but he thought he remembered Ness and Cass being a lot swattier the previous day- now, if Maddy earned even a small reprimand, it didn't earn her any swats to her rear; he figured it was in deference to how sore the young woman still was. They were also quick to wrap Maddy in a comforting hug after a reprimand, even if the reprimand was a sole sharp word that took less time than the subsequent hug.
It was way more touching than Hotch thought he'd ever be comfortable with, but he had to acknowledge that Maddy seemed happy, and Ness and Cass seemed to be incredibly loving- he felt bad for having ever doubted them, but he still struggled with the idea that parent figures could actually be good.
Regardless, his nerves were soothed and he was able to relax as the group made dinner together before sitting down to eat it in front of a movie.
-o-o-o-o-o-
It had been three days since he last got into any trouble, and Hotch was ashamed to admit that it was making him antsy- since when was he that much of a troublemaker? Then again, he hadn't been getting into any trouble: no arguing, no backtalk or sarcasm, he even avoided picking at his cuticles despite his stress. He had always thought that he was a decent person before, but was he really this much trouble?
That thought only furthered his determination to be on his best behavior, no matter how antsy he was getting.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Dave sighed internally as he watched his surrogate son bite back another sarcastic comment, knowing that sooner or later Hotch's current restraint would catch up with him. To be honest, he didn't think Hotch's 'perfect child' routine would have lasted long, but it seemed as though Maddy was doing the same thing, and so neither caved. Hotch was practically vibrating with nervous energy, having been so well behaved the last couple of days that he didn't even give Dave sass.
This never ended well, and he doubted this time would be any different. Ness, apparently seeing through him as always, encouraged Aaron and Maddy to go set up a game in the living room as Ness arranged cheese and crackers on a plate. Dave, trying to do his part, grabbed wine glasses from the cabinet and then went to look at Ness's selections of wine. It was when he had another activity he could be looking at that Ness finally spoke- he knew that trick, had certainly used it on Aaron enough times, but he couldn't bring himself to be offended by the gesture. After all, it did help uncomfortable conversation.
"What's eating you, Dave?" Ness asked in her standard drawl, "you're quiet. Usually if one of the kids is quiet, that's a bad sign, so spill."
"I'm reading too far into things," he grumbled as he pulled out a bottle of wine to examine the label more closely.
"Why don't you let me be the judge of that."
"Aaron is just being really well-behaved and I know I shouldn't complain, but that never ends well."
"Ain't that the truth," Ness said with a chuckle, "I'd be lying if I told you I hadn't noticed that in both kids. Probably a reaction to how much trouble they found themselves in, the first day here."
"Probably," Dave shrugged and finally decided on a bottle of wine, "that doesn't mean this will end well," he pointed out.
"Probably," Ness echoed, then added, "there isn't really anything you can do about it, you just have to let it happen."
"So I'm just supposed to wait until Aaron gets himself in an incredible amount of trouble, because that's how this always goes?"
"The alternative is telling him that you're worried that he's being well behaved," she pointed out, popping a cube of cheese into her mouth, and Dave acknowledged that she had a point.
They were about to bring the plate and glasses into the living room when they heard the door open, and lingered in the kitchen long enough for Cass to enter and kiss Ness. Her schedule was different from Ness and Maddy's, and Dave admired the way they made it work regardless. They both had workaholic tendencies, just in different occupations.
"Anything interesting happen when I was teaching?" she asked, "I wish I could have taken off this week, but we're nearing the end of the semester and I can't afford to miss any more classes."
"We know, babe," Ness said with a smile, "no one is holding it against you. And to answer your question, today has been uneventful. Dave," she emphasized his name teasingly, "was just, in fact, worried by the lack of trouble or other eventful moments."
"Maddy's pulling the 'I can be good' routine again?"
"Aaron, too," Dave added with a wince, "you have a name for it?"
"Happens often enough," Cass shrugged.
"She's done too much research on this subject," Ness said at the same time, shooting her girlfriend a fondly exasperated look.
"Should we start betting on how much trouble they'll eventually get into once they break their best behavior oath?"
"Cass!" Ness said, elbowing the other woman, who merely laughed.
"You know it's true," she countered.
"Doesn't mean we should bet on it!"
"They're going to go on an unsanctioned adventure without us," Dave said.
"Dave!" Ness exclaimed, "not you too!"
"Rationale?" Cass asked.
"I just looked in the living room and neither of them are still there," Dave replied wryly.
-o-o-o-o-o-
They didn't initially plan on going AWOL, it just sort of… happened. Maddy was sitting with Aaron as they set up Trivial Pursuit, but they finished long before Ness and Dave did. They were both twitchy, too, from being on their very best behavior. Though it was probably embarrassing to admit, Maddy got swatted by her parent figures frequently, at least when they were at home. Ness and Cass weren't unreasonably strict, and they would frequently laugh in response to her sarcasm and quips, but she had a tendency to accidentally veer into the disrespectful and that's when she would get a reminder to behave from one of her surrogate mothers.
She had been trying to be so well behaved that she was quieter than usual, avoiding sarcasm and joking, and she felt like she was about to burst with pent-up nervous energy.
There was one other habit of Maddy's guaranteed to get her at least a few swats- talking negatively about herself. The last few days, she hadn't voiced any of those thoughts, but that didn't mean that they weren't plaguing her. She was bad, she knew she was bad, and she probably embarrassed Ness in front of Dave that first day, and maybe if she showed that she could learn and could be good then maybe, just maybe, Ness would want to keep her around.
Between the pent-up guilt for the negative thoughts and the cruel negative thoughts themselves, she was on edge and increasingly nervous.
"You okay?" Aaron asked in a low voice, sounding a little awkward, though the sentiment was appreciated.
"Sure," Mads shrugged, "I'm just a little twitchy." Then, because she had no filter and could use a few pointers, she added, "how are you so well-behaved all the time?"
"Huh?" he said looking confused.
"Your behavior," Maddy said, "how are you so good, always."
"Oh!" Hotch said softly, sounding a little confused, "I'm really not."
"Could've fooled me," she grumbled, "if this isn't your good behavior, I'm scared to know what is."
"No," Aaron sighed, and rubbed the back of his neck as his face turned red, "this is my… I'm not usually this good," he sounded dejected, and Mads looked up in surprise as he continued, "I was too much trouble that first day, so I'm trying to show…" he trailed off, but Maddy thought she knew where he was going.
"That you aren't a lost cause?"
"Yeah," he said softly.
"That's what I'm doing too," she said, "that first day, I found myself in more trouble than ever before," she said, and didn't even notice that she snaked a hand back to rub her ass as if it were habit (which, to be fair, it basically was.) Then, the two lapsed into silence, both lost in their own thoughts.
"Does it ever work for you?" Aaron asked suddenly.
"What?"
"Does it ever work for you? Being this well behaved, that is," he explained, and she felt her face heat up as she thought about how to respond.
"No," she admitted, "I keep trying, though."
"Usually, I end up so tense that when I finally get in trouble, it's of an impressive magnitude," Hotch offered with a wry smile.
"Me too," Mads confirmed, before a thought struck her-
"What if we just get it over with now? The getting in trouble part."
-o-o-o-o-o-
Aaron thought he might seriously be losing his mind, if he was seriously contemplating Maddy's ill-advised plan. He felt a little better after talking to her, she clearly understood the things he was feeling and, if he believed her, she had been feeling those things too. It was torture to try and be this well-behaved, and they would ultimately end up in a lot of trouble regardless, if the past was anything to go on…
"Sure, I guess," he offered tentatively, feeling weird.
"You seem weird about it," Maddy said bluntly.
"It's just," he shrugged, "when I get into trouble, I'm usually being disrespectful or stupid, and not thinking through the consequences. This is premeditated."
"Yeah," she said, "we don't have to if you don't feel comfortable…"
"I feel like I'm about to crawl out of my skin," he said wryly, "as weird as this feels otherwise, I think I'd like to lose the nerves."
"Me too," she said, then hummed under her breath, clearly in thought. Finally, she asked, "do you have any ideas?"
"This is your turf," he pointed out.
"Let's sneak out and get drunk?" Maddy suggested, "there's a good pub within walking distance."
"Sure," Aaron said tentatively, shrugging. He knew Dave would not react well to that plan, at all, but… he was helping Maddy out too, right? To help her get rid of the same feelings that plagued him? The argument sounded weak even to himself, but he forced down his qualms and, with a surprising amount of resolution, said, "okay, let's do it."
It was pretty easy to sneak out when their mentors were busy talking, and other than having to dive behind the bushes once as they saw Cass's car drive by, they made it to the pub without any issue. They hadn't had food since brunch and they were nearing 5 in the evening, so any alcohol would undoubtedly hit them hard- Aaron ordered a gin and tonic.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Maddy wished that she could enjoy the tipsy sensation creeping up on her, courtesy of her vodka and cranberry drink, but her nerves were getting to her and she found it difficult to relax. The best way to solve that, though, was with more alcohol; she vaguely registered that it was a terrible idea as she rapidly downed her drink and ordered another. And another. Finally, three drinks in, she could lose her nerves about being well behaved or in trouble and about Ness and Cass's continuing care for her. She could forget how stupidly pathetic she felt, acting out like a disobedient teenager about to be sent to off to military school.
Wait, Ness wouldn't ship her off to some other unit or something, right? Or would this just prove there was no other way of handling Mads, she was beyond all hope. Maddy didn't realize that she had started hyperventilating until a tipsy Hotch grabbed her biceps to hold her upright, instructing her to breathe with him.
As much as she tried, though, she was too caught up in her own self-recimation to regain a normal breathing pattern, and she saw Aaron nervously glance at her before pulling out his phone with shaky hands.
"Dave?" she heard Aaron say in a small voice that felt infinitely far away, "we need help. Please." Briefly, Mads thought about how much of a traitor Hotch was in that moment, though when she paused to look at him, actually look at him, she could see that he was shaking slightly with an apprehensive look on his face, likely panicking himself. Maddy moved her barstool closer to Aaron's and leaned her head against his shoulder, noting with surprise that he leaned into the contact. Before she could overthink that, another guilty thought popped up in her head, and she started to again breathe shallowly; she barely felt the arm Hotch wrapped around her shoulders as they sat there together, miserable.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Hotch berated himself over and over for agreeing to go along with Maddy's plan from the moment they had left the house, but his mental castigation increased exponentially as he watched Mads drink too much, too fast, before having a panic attack.
He felt like a jerk, but he had to call Dave… right? He barely knew how to handle his own panic attacks, and Aaron knew that the people that would truly be able to soothe Maddy were Ness and Cass. If he called Dave and asked for help, he was certain the two women would come along; so that's what he did.
Waiting for the parental figures to show up, Aaron didn't even have time to worry about his mentor's reaction, being more concerned with Maddy's slight hyperventilation. He didn't think she realized, but every so often she would whimper a word or two like 'don't leave' or 'be better.' He never truly understood how Maddy could feel the same way as him, insecure about their mentors' patience for misbehavior- Ness and Cass clearly loved Maddy, he had seen that plain as day.
Really, he should have probably have been worrying more about his continued place in Dave's life, but he barely had time to think about that, too busy trying to ensure Maddy's continued breathing.
Finally he heard the door open and a rush of footsteps behind them as Dave and Ness rushed into the pub. Aaron kept holding onto Maddy until Ness gently pulled the other woman into her arms, at which point Aaron turned around to where he knew his mentor was standing and fell into Rossi's hug, clinging more than he'd ever admit.
He felt bad that he had put Dave through seeing so many of his panic attacks- watching Maddy's had been terrifying- but he thought he would likely get scolded for such an apology and, right now, he needed Dave's care. If Rossi was surprised by how tactile Hotch was he didn't show it, instead pulling the younger man even closer. Aaron felt one large hand cup the back of his head, the other gently rubbing his back, and a moment later those same hands were helping him stand up from the barstool.
He wasn't too unsteady, having sobered up rapidly, but he was definitely still feeling the effects of his drinking. He pressed closer to Dave as they stepped into the chilly evening air- he and Mads hadn't thought to grab coats on the way out the door- and followed the women to the car.
Ness took the driver's seat, Maddy took the passenger seat looking pained, and Dave guided Aaron into the backseat before he followed, allowing for continued contact. Maddy was sitting on her hands, and Hotch wondered why she wasn't plastered to Ness the same way he was currently attached to Dave- she was, after all, usually the one who was more tactile in her affection. Ness put a hand on her shoulder regardless, and kept it there for the entirety of the short drive back to the Bradley-Verity brownstone.
He soon found himself guided into the house and, subsequently, to the bedroom he had been staying in. Dave didn't bother to let go the entire time, but Aaron couldn't find it in himself to care; it was comforting and helped stave off fears of impending abandonment. By that point, he could barely use intoxication as an excuse for being so touchy- he was nearly sober. Still, Dave didn't seem to mind, and so he let himself have the comfort for a moment before pulling away.
"I'm sorry," Aaron said genuinely, the apology whispered in a horrified tone, "I'm really sorry, Dave. I don't know what I was thinking."
"You weren't," Dave growled under his breath and Aaron looked up at him sharply. Seemingly realizing this, he relaxed his face into something warmer and continued, "I shouldn't have said that, that was pure sarcasm. It doesn't mean anything, Aaron," his mentor was quick to reassure him though Hotch didn't know if he should believe it or not. Before he could think too long in deliberation, Dave asked him, "how are you feeling?"
"Like crap," he admitted, "I have a headache and the lights hurt." Distantly, he realized that he was getting an early-evening hangover, but he didn't want to dwell on that, "I'm still not even completely sober," he added, "just mostly."
"What were you and Maddy thinking, Aaron?!" Dave asked, his voice naturally becoming louder though, at Aaron's flinch, he made a better effort to modulate the volume. Hotch struggled to think of a way to answer that question which didn't seem completely absurd or childish, then realized that their behavior probably really was absurd and childish.
"It's embarrassing," he finally settled on his answer, mumbling the words.
"Embarrassing?" Rossi repeated, seemingly in disbelief, "Aaron, you went and got plastered way too early in the day, clearly something is up." His mentor sounded so sure of that statement and Hotch's heart dropped- there was no way he'd get out of this before having to reveal the flawed intentions behind the trip to the pub. Finally, after getting no response from Aaron, Rossi sighed heavily and asked, "you know what I think this is all about?"
The answer was no, but he doubted Rossi would take kindly to that answer and instead, just shrugged. Fortunately, Dave didn't seem to want a verbal answer to that particular question, if the lack of scolding for shrugging was any indication.
"I think," he said, and Hotch braced for the worst, "that this has happened before. I think," he paused again for just a moment, "that for some reason, both you and your cousin got it into your heads that you had to behave perfectly- hey, no, look back up at me," Dave coaxed his protege's eyes up from the ground, "and I think that setting unreasonable expectations for yourself stresses you out so much that you end up in a lot of trouble. Am I sounding correct so far?"
"I don't expect you to be perfectly behaved, Aaron," Dave continued after Aaron's nod, "whatever the hell you even think of as perfectly behaved, it's not what I expect from you. And before you can say anything about how you didn't want to burden me, you aren't. I don't mind," he stressed, "If I did, I would have just written you up officially those other times. Or fired you."
Suddenly Aaon found his throat tight as he struggled to breathe; Dave's hand rubbed his back gently and he soothed Hotch in a soft tone, "hey," he said, "look at me?" Once Aaron had forced his eyes up to his mentor's face, Dave slowly moved the hand from Aaron's back up to gently cradle his cheek instead, "I'm not going to do either of those things, Aaron," he said, "you're stuck with me. I just want to make sure that this doesn't happen again."
Miserably, Hotch nodded his head and awaited sentencing.
"This isn't the first time we've had to have a talk like this, is it?" Dave said gently, but Aaron felt guilt and shame bubble up at the question as he shook his head miserably, "no, it's not. And, in an effort to not have future conversations like this, I'm sure you know you're getting spanked." Aaron bit his lip but nodded- it wasn't anything that he didn't expect. "Then, before bed, I'm gonna put you over my knee again for a little reminder," Rossi surprised him by adding, and he must have looked panic because Dave rubbed the pad of his thumb against Hotch's cheekbone to try and get his protege's attention, "it's alright, it's not a big deal. It's just something we're gonna try, alright? I don't like watching you self-destruct, Aaron." Finally, Hotch forced himself to nod despite his increasing dread, "good man," his mentor gently praised, "are you ready to get this part over with?" Again, despite increasing dread, Hotch nodded.
Dave sat back on the bed so he wasn't quite at the edge anymore, and Aaron knew the gesture meant he would be turned over his mentor's knee like an errant child. If that wasn't bad enough, Rossi's gentle instructions to 'lose the pants and boxers' made his face heat up; why did I ever think that the pub was a good idea? he wondered as the consequences loomed before him. Still, he followed instructions and pulled down the sweatpants and boxers he had on before getting situated over Dave's knee. As he squirmed into a more comfortable position, Dave rubbed his back gently and then, when Hotch's movements had died down, asked him if he was ready.
In Hotch's opinion, that was a supremely stupid question- was anyone ever ready for their disappointed mentor to spank them like a misbehaving child?
"I'm disappointed in your actions, Aaron," Dave said, "not you. Never you," it was those words that made him realize that he had probably grumbled his last thought out loud, and he hid his face in his arms, "you know better than to go out and get drunk specifically because you were looking for trouble," he continued his lecture before landing the first pair of swats to Hotch's behind.
"Getting drunk," he said over the sound of the spanking that was rapidly increasing in intensity, "is usually a bad idea to begin with and a worse idea if you're doing with any ulterior motive," that made shame stir in Hotch again and he fought the tears that were arising embarrassingly quickly, "you know better, Aaron."
Maybe it was the leftover alcohol in his system, or maybe it was the stress of trying to be well-behaved the last few days, but Hotch found his emotional walls crumbling embarrassingly quickly as he started crying early into his punishment. Rossi seemed unfazed and just continued to pepper Hotch's ass with stinging swats.
"I don't expect you to be perfectly behaved, Aaron," Dave said, then landed a few especially sting-y spanks, "whatever you think perfectly behaved is, I don't expect that from you. Yeah, I might spank you if you do something dangerous like this," he said, "or I might swat you for minor disobedience, but I never, never," he stressed, "expect you to be someone you're not. I wouldn't care for you this way if I didn't want to," his mentor added, "but I do want to care about you, and that includes shit like this after you've gone off and done something dangerous."
"Sorry," Aaron gasped, surprising himself- he was normally silent during punishments, but the increased emotions he was feeling was making that hard, and he gasped out once more, "I'm sorry, Dave."
"I know," Dave said, pausing to rub Aaron's back gently, "you're doing well, we have just a little more to go." At that announcement, Aaron buried his face in his arms and tried to hide his dismay- at this rate, he'd end up embarrassing himself with the amount of tears he was shedding. "Give me your hand, Aaron," Dave's next instruction surprised him, and he was instantly cautious- what was Dave planning to do to him?!
"It's alright," his mentor soothed, "this last part of the spanking is going to be hard, though, and I don't want you reaching back," Hotch nearly whimpered at the announcement, "and I think that the contact will help ground you before you get lost in that guilt of yours." No one could ever say Dave didn't know his protege incredibly well, and Hotch deliberated only a minute before blindly reaching his hand behind his back.
"Thank you," Dave said, taking Aaron's hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, "we're almost done." Aaron's apprehensiveness rose after Dave didn't immediately resume the spanking, though once he felt a wide, cool surface against his ass, he wondered when Dave had managed to grab a hairbrush.
"You," Rossi started, accompanying the word with a loud swat from the brush, "mean too much to me," another swat, "to let you self destruct like this," the last swat was probably the hardest of them all so far and Hotch felt himself tense up before Dave gently rubbed his back. "I care about you," he swung the brush down twice in rapid succession, "and I love you for you," another two swats, "not for whoever you think you should be that's worthy of love." Another few swats, then Dave added, "you are worthy of love," though Aaron could barely hear it over the smack that accompanied each word.
"I love you too much to let you do dangerous shit," another few smacks fell and Hotch stifled a sob, "I love you, Aaron, you. Not whoever you think you should be, but the great man you are." With that, he didn't speak any further and instead focused his energy on making sure Aaron knew the magnitude of how much, bringing the brush down hard and in rapid succession. This probably wasn't the worst spanking the man had ever delivered, but it was pretty up there, and the words and smacks quickly reduced Hotch to sobs.
He laid over Dave's knee, sobbing with huge, shuddery, gasping breaths. He didn't even realize the spanking had ended until he became aware of Dave's hand on his back, rubbing gentle circles. He'd blame the alcohol for his lack of inhibition, but for once in his life, he didn't try to stifle his tears. Instead, he sobbed into the bedspread, too wrung out to care- he couldn't even bring himself to care enough to respond to the reignited pain as Dave helped him right his clothing, and then Hotch found himself flipped over in his mentor's lap.
"Shh," Rossi soothed gently, situating Aaron so that his sore behind dipped down between his mentor's knees and his head was tucked under the veteran profiler's chin, "it's alright, I've got you," he returned to gently rubbing Hotch's back, "I've got you." Hotch's sobbing didn't break through that, and he didn't know how long he cried against his mentor for.
"You needed that, huh?" Dave said knowingly as Aaron's tears dwindled.
"I guess," Hotch said diplomatically, trying to hide the bright red blush that Dave's comment elicited, then took a large and shuddery breath, "you're really not mad?"
"No, Aaron," Dave said with a sad smile, "I was never really mad, mostly I was worried. I didn't know where you were, yanno, and then you called, panicked about Maddy and, well, overprotective mentor overdrive," he smiled wryly.
"You're not mad I was trying to…" Aaron trailed off, not knowing how to phrase his question in the least embarrassing manner.
"Trying to be pathologically well behaved instead of talking to me about your insecurities?" Dave asked, knowingly, "I know you Aaron, I know how hard talking about that shit can be for you. I'm not mad, not at all. We're going to work on talking about feelings, because we really could both use the practice, but I'm not mad."
"Not mad?" Aaron asked again, just to check, as he felt his eyes start to drift close.
"Not mad," Dave responded softly, and Aaron grabbed some of the material of the older man's shirt to ensure he couldn't escape, "not mad at all."
With that, Hotch gave up on the battle to stay awake and let his eyes slip shut.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Maddy was angry at Aaron for calling Dave, though as the two mentors entered the pub and she rapidly found herself wrapped in Ness's arms, most of her anger evaporated.
"You, my dear," Ness said quietly, pressing a kiss to the top of Maddy's head, "are in so much trouble." Maddy whimpered at that, the alcohol making it impossible to hide her reactions, "but right now I'm just glad you're safe." Maddy nestled into the warm arms, but all too soon found herself being led out of the pub.
It was then that she became even more panicked. First, she felt a flash of jealousy as she watched Dave enter the backseat with Aaron, still comforting him, while she had to take the passenger seat of the car- it felt isolated, and lonely, and like a punishment. Needless to say, it unsettled her in a way few things did, but it was clear to her that she fucked up beyond repair if her normally tactile mentor had her sit alone. Soon, she felt Ness's hand on her shoulder, but chalked it up to the older woman not wanting her to run.
Second, she didn't know where Cass was- she hadn't joined Dave and Ness in their expedition to bring their proteges home. Was she that mad that she didn't even want to see Maddy? While it was her relationship with Ness that brought her into the family, she had rapidly become extremely fond of Cass as well. Suddenly, she regretted not officially moving in with her surrogate parents- then they wouldn't kick her out, not right away at least, right? They were good people, better than she deserved really, and they wouldn't have forced her out with nowhere to go. They'd at least wait for her to find a new home, probably. But she still kept her apartment lease, so they wouldn't have to feel bad like they would if they were gonna send her out into the cold with nowhere to go.
"Sweet girl," the familiar term of endearment jolted Maddy from her spiral of panicked thoughts, and she saw Cass bending over to be at eye level with Maddy, who looked away in fear of the rejection she knew she was about to face. She could hear Ness and Cass talking, but she didn't know what they were saying, it all felt distant and fuzzy.
When she became more aware of her surroundings, she realized that she was being carried by Ness as if she were really a little kid and she dropped her head against her boss's shoulder, unable to suppress her small whine.
"It's okay, darling," Ness whispered before pressing a kiss against Maddy's temple, "it's alright. We're just going to our room, I think we need to have a talk." At those words, Maddy's stomach twisted painfully- this was it, she knew this was it, so why was she so upset? After all, she had seen this coming from the moment Ness had offered her a job- she was Mads, a misbehaving brat who didn't know a good thing when it hit her in the face. She decided to take advantage of the last bit of comfort Ness was giving her, refusing to move her face from her boss's shoulder until she was sat down on the bed, Ness and Cass standing in front of her.
She felt her face crumple the moment she looked up at them, then dropped her eyes before she could witness their disappointment in any great detail. She pulled her legs up on the bed, wrapping her arms around her knees in a self-soothing gesture she rarely used these days. Dropping her forehead to her knees, Mads missed the concerned looks that the other two women sent her.
The bed dipped next to her, and Mads felt an arm snake over her shoulders- she didn't know if she should flinch away from it, not wanting to torture herself further with something she would be losing imminently, or if she should lean into it and accept the last bit of comfort. She settled on tentatively leaning closer, though her muscles were tight if she needed to make a hasty getaway.
"Sweet girl?" she heard in the distance, though the term of endearment repeated until it felt like it was coming from the woman sitting next to Mads- Cass, Cass was the one who called her that usually, and maybe she wasn't so mad that she wouldn't at least say goodbye to Maddy. A hand rubbed up and down her back and Mads shuddered, tears springing to her eyes; she would really miss this, and it was her own damn fault for fucking it up. Her relationship with Ness and Cass was one of the best parts of her life, and she had just thrown it away for nothing.
"I'm afraid she's going to make herself sick from crying," she heard Ness's voice in the distance, and, not wanting to worry her mentor, Mads stifled her tears immediately.
"Whoa," she heard her boss say in her normal drawl before feeling the woman crouch in front of where she was sitting on the bed, "no doing that, okay? If you need to cry, that's okay."
"But…" she felt herself say feebly.
"But nothing," Ness said, and her normal no-nonsense tone felt like it was slicing through Maddy's sensitive psyche as she couldn't help but start to sob again, "oh no, honey, I'm not mad at you," she heard Ness say. Then, she felt the bed dip beside her on the other side, and found herself sandwiched between her surrogate parents as she sobbed.
Finally, she felt like she had run out of tears and lifted her head, still breathing shakily. "You're still here?" she asked in surprise, then muttered to herself, "of course you are, you all are good."
"So are you, darling," Ness said, but Maddy only flinched.
"I'm not," she said, "I'm not and you're right to kick me out." The room grew silent at that declaration, and Maddy couldn't even hear Ness or Cass's breathing- there was her confirmation that they were leading up to that, though trying to tell her gently. It was okay, though- she didn't need gentle.
"Sweet girl," Cass's voice sounded choked.
"Did you really think we were going to kick you out?" Ness asked, and Mads shrugged- she didn't understand why the other women seemed so upset, she was trying to make it easier for them.
"We are absolutely not doing that," Cass said firmly, "sweet girl, you're stuck with us."
"But-"
"But nothing," Ness interrupted Maddy's protest, "you made a mistake and we'll deal with it, as a family, like we always do."
"Before we have that discussion, though," Cass said, and Maddy felt her heart plummet. She guessed her face paled at the same time, because a moment later, Cass said, "nothing bad, I promise. We were just talking," again, Mads stiffened up.
"You're torturing the poor girl," Ness said, "I know we mentioned this a few times before, but we would like you to not renew your apartment lease and instead, to move in with us."
"Where will I go when you kick me out, though?" Mads asked, the words coming to her lips before she could even think about it, and Cass made a strangled sound next to her.
"We're not planning on kicking you out, darling," Ness said, "you basically live with us anyways, though, and I think you could use the reminder that we're here for you always, no matter what."
"Can I think about it?" Mads found herself asking, chewing on her bottom lip.
"Of course, sweet girl," Cass replied, "we just wanted you to know how serious we are about the offer. We want you here, baby, you're our kid." If Mads had any tears left in her, she would surely have started sobbing again. As it were, she took a few choked-sounding breaths and hid her face in her knees, trying to process the fact that she wasn't going to be sent away and, if anything, her surrogate mothers wanted to keep her even closer.
"I'm in so much trouble, aren't I?" Mads said miserably as everything caught up with her and the last bit of alcohol seemingly left her system.
"Yeah, sweet girl," Cass said, sounding apologetic, "you really are."
"Here's the plan," Ness said, and Maddy shifted her attention towards her boss, "first, we're going to talk about what happened today. Then, I'm going to spank you. Before bed, Cass is going to give you another small spanking, but you're already forgiven, okay?" Mads didn't truly believe it but she nodded regardless until she was struck with a realization.
"Do I still have to," she started, then lost her nerve and quickly mumbled out the rest of her query, "stand in the corner tonight?" Standing in the corner was always difficult for her, but after the first day when she freaked out and was too needy after a day full of being bad, she resolved to do her best to comply with the punishment without complaint. She hated having to stand in the corner, and she hated even more being bare-bottomed in the corner; it made her feel impossibly young and extremely in trouble, but afterwards the embraces of Ness and Cass soothed any lingering guilt. So she sucked it up and dealt with any feelings of nervousness, unwilling to argue about a punishment she had clearly earned. But thinking of being spanked and then having to wait in the corner for a half hour before getting comfort seemed excruciating.
Still with her face hidden in her knees, she missed the look Ness and Cass gave each other, and the subsequent nonverbal conversation they held.
"Yes, sweet girl," Cass said, sounding apologetic, but Mads felt something inside her shatter. She didn't know if she could do it, if she could behave, or if she'd prove to them that she was really hopeless and they'd be better off if they kicked her out now while she still had her own lease. "Hey," Cass said, distracting Maddy from her spiral of negative thoughts, and Mads realized her breathing had grown labored, "it wouldn't be very good for your mind if we weren't consistent about this, but we don't want to torture you, so you have a few options. Do you want to hear them now, or wait until bedtime?"
"Now," Mads demanded instantly, knowing that she would begin panicking long before bedtime if she didn't know.
"Okay," Cass said, then repeated, "okay. Can you look at me, sweet girl?" Some of Maddy's hair had fallen in her face, and Cass gently tucked the red strande behind her ear before starting to lay out her options, "you are getting a spanking and you are getting a time out," Mads wondered if Cass really had to call it that as she felt her face grow red, but she didn't say anything.
"However, the order that those things happen in is not set. You can stand in the corner after your spanking," she said, but paused at Maddy's frantic head shake, "I figured as much. You can stand in the corner before your spanking, or we could do half-and-half."
"Can't I just do double tomorrow night?" Maddy couldn't stop herself from asking, the thought of having to stand in the corner a little unbearable regardless of the order of events.
"Darling, that would mean you standing in the corner for an hour, and that's just not a good idea. For multiple reasons," Ness said, "so no, you have to get them both over with tonight. Which order seems the least distressing?"
None of them, Mads wanted to scream, but instead she hunched in on herself and tried to control her breathing. She couldn't think of a good option, but supposed that breaking the time up would mean that the time waiting wouldn't feel as excruciatingly long, and so she whispered, "half-and-half." She was still nervous, but Ness had said to pick the least distressing option, so she probably knew that it was gonna be hard for Mads regardless.
"Alright," Cass said, and dropped a kiss on the top of Maddy's head, "thank you." Maddy thought it was weird that she was being thanked for accepting a punishment she more than earned, but didn't say anything about it.
"Now," Ness said, and Mads felt her stomach sink, "I think we've put this off for long enough, so over my lap you go." She didn't complain, though, as she stood up and had her pants and underwear whisked down before finding herself over Ness's lap; Cass had moved at the same time to Ness's other side, and Maddy's torso ended up being balanced over the other woman's lap. She tried to suppress her whimper, but wasn't entirely successful, and felt Ness rub her back with one hand even as she felt the other resting on her bottom. Maddy braced herself, but she was convinced that no one could ever be truly ready for the first swat.
Ness was quiet as she methodically spanked Mads, and Maddy was glad- they had talked so much already, and she had just been getting more and more nervous. She knew that her surrogate mothers would make her have that conversation, but she was grateful it wasn't right away. Finally, after a minute of Ness spanking nonstop, the older woman paused- Maddy felt like her bottom had to be cherry red by now. She turned her head hoping to see if her evaluation was correct but, to her surprise, her bottom was only a dull pink. Ness caught her eye and smiled gently, and Mads returned her head to her arms, cheeks flaming.
"Why did you decide to sneak out and then get drunk?" Ness asked, and Maddy really would have rather not answered. However, a few warning pats on her bottom reminded her that talking wasn't exactly optional at the moment.
"I was getting twitchy," Mads said, because even if she had to answer, she could still answer cryptically.
"Twitchy?" Ness said, sounding unimpressed with Maddy's attempts to dodge conversation.
"It was… it was hard to be so good," she whispered, giving up on trying to avoid having to reveal her feelings, "I know I must be really bad, if a few days of being good made me feel like my skin was crawling but-" her sentence was cut off with a yelp as Ness landed a heavy swat.
"You are not bad, Madison," Ness lectured, and Mads felt her nerves increase as she heard her full name, and she mumbled an apology. "You made a bad choice today, though, and I'm still waiting to hear why." That was Ness's not-so-subtle way of informing her that she didn't want to ask a third time, so Mads tried to rephrase what had come out in an earlier panic.
"I was trying really hard to be good, after I got in all that trouble in one day. And I know that dealing with me was a lot of effort and I just got in so much trouble and I thought that maybe… maybe you'd still keep me around if I showed that I could be good and learn."
"You're always good, sweet girl," Cass said softly, "even when you get into a lot of trouble, you're still good and we will always want you around."
"The other day was hard on you, hm?" Ness asked, and Maddy just nodded miserably. She supposed she must have looked truly pathetic because ordinarily one of the other women would scold her for not answering verbally. "This has been eating at you for a while, hasn't it?" Ness asked, and Maddy nodded again- it had been eating at her since before she got in trouble earlier that week, the worry had started when her insomnia did.
"Hard days happen, but that doesn't change that we love you always," Ness said, and Mads just shrugged, "we'll work on that. You wanted to prove that you could avoid getting in trouble and then it blew up in your face?" Ness asked, and Maddy whimpered an affirmative answer. "Darling, you can avoid all this if you come talk to us when you feel those insecurities," she said, "we'll always listen."
With that, Ness decided that the time for talking was over, and resumed the spanking with fast and hard swats. Maddy was on the verge of tears, trying her hardest not to squirm, when she felt a smooth, cool surface on her hot behind- a hairbrush. Trying to stifle her dread, she buried her head further into her arms as she waited anxiously- though, fortunately or unfortunately, she didn't have to wait that long.
Ness was never big on lecturing while she spanked, instead focusing all her attention on delivering a punishment that wouldn't be forgotten anytime soon. Mads felt her bottom become impossibly hot, and still the hairbrush kept landing on it. Soon, the pain combined with her lingering guilt and insecurities forced the first few hot tears to roll down her face, and then she couldn't stop them. Still, the hairbrush kept landing, though it moved to her thighs- it was only a moment later that Maddy gave up any semblance of fighting and went boneless over the knees of her surrogate parents, and after a few last swats, Ness set the hairbrush down and directed her efforts towards comforting the well-spanked girl.
Maddy just laid there sobbing for a few minutes, glad that no one was rushing her to get her feelings under control. Eventually, her sobs turned to sniffles and Ness helped her right her clothing before standing up. She nervously looked at the ground, still insecure, and worried that somehow something changed for the worse. Then, she saw Ness open her arms for a hug and barreled into the older woman's arms, clinging. Ness hugged her for a long while until Mads yawned, and then her surrogate mother rearranged them so that Maddy was laying down in the bed.
"You can nap here," Ness said, "where we can keep an eye on you." Maddy felt her face grow hot, but couldn't deny that something inside her felt warm at Ness's mothering instincts. She closed her eyes and, within a minute, was fast asleep.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Me: Doesn't write anything for three months
Also me: Writes this entire chapter in 1.5 days
I'm currently in the middle of writing the next updates to my currently unfinished stories. Part of my current struggle is with POV and mindset- it's hard to write the thoughts of Rossi when I really have only experienced Aaron's half of those discipline interactions, which is why this chapter was largely told through the viewpoints of Hotch and Mads. Sometimes, their behavior is completely off the rails, and though I understand their motivations, I have no idea how it looks from the outside, to Toppy people. If anyone wants to inform me of the mindset of the other half of the dynamic, it would be appreciated!
As always, until next time…
- lms