Over the next month, Elizabeth fell into a rhythm of balancing her new life with a baby. She and Rosemary bonded further over their roles as new mothers. Little Fred was officially adopted a couple weeks after Christmas, and he and the Coulters were both thrilled with the arrangement. Elizabeth was happy for them. They deserved every happiness. It was nice being able to talk with her friend about the trials and errors that came with motherhood.

Another addition in her life was frequent trips to the cemetery, something she'd missed since being on bed rest. She bundled her daughter warmly each time, spending an hour talking with her husband about their little girl and all the things the baby did. She also talked to him about her still-confusing feelings for Carson. On a day in early February, she heaved a long sigh after another one-sided talk with Jack about the local doctor.

"I don't know how I feel. I know you've heard me say this every time I've come here, but it weighs on me. He hasn't said anything about his own feelings, but I've realized that your mother and Abigail are right. He feels something. I can see it every time he looks at me. He still comes over often for lunch, at my invitation. I worry that I might be giving him false hope, but we talk about you a lot, and we talk about Amber a lot. He's been a wonderful help with Lottie." She smiled as she thought about Carson holding the baby. It was clear her little girl already had an affinity for him. Besides Elizabeth, Lottie seemed to prefer Carson being the one to hold her.

"I can't stomach the thought of not having these lunches, Jack. Carson has come to mean a lot to me. He's an important person in my life." She reached out, touching the gravestone. "But you were my life for so long. You haven't been gone long. How can I move on so fast? It feels disrespectful to your memory and the love we had for each other."

Another sigh escaped her. "We keep going around and around in circles about this, don't we?" She brushed a kiss on Lottie's head, then rested her cheek against the baby. "I wish you could tell me what to do, Jack. I miss hearing your wisdom. You would know what to say."

Promise me you'll be open to love again, Elizabeth. You have so much love to give. Don't keep it locked inside. If you have the chance to be happy, take it.

Jack's words from his final letter came unbidden to her mind. She gasped, clutching Lottie close, hearing his voice in her head. As if to emphasize his point, a beam of sunlight broke through the clouds, enveloping the graveyard in momentarily light. It lasted only a few seconds before the clouds once more hid the sun, but it was enough to leave Elizabeth slightly shaken. Had she just received a message from her husband?

Be open to love again.

"I don't know if I'm ready."

The voice in her head grew more insistent. Be open to love again.

She bit her lip. Could she? The question stayed on her mind most of the day. In her head, she knew Jack would want her to be happy. She knew he would want her to open her heart. Part of her wanted to do exactly that. There was no denying she found Carson attractive and enjoyed being around him. Her heart whispered that he was a man she could easily love. But another part of her rebelled at the thought of leaving Jack behind.

She could think of little else the rest of the day. Being so conflicted was not conducive to sleep. Elizabeth tossed and turned all night. Before dawn, she gave up. With a little sigh, she slipped out of bed and dressed for the day. As Lottie was still sleeping, she decided to make herself a cup of tea and do some journaling. That always seemed to help sort out her thoughts.

Before leaving the room, she walked to the bassinet beside her bed. She peered into it, then frowned. Something felt off. Lottie slept, but her little mouth was puckered and her forehead wrinkled as if in pain. Her face was red - too red. Elizabeth placed a hand on her cheek, then gasped. The baby's skin was fiery. She lifted her daughter from the bassinet. Lottie's little body burned with fever, and she didn't wake when Elizabeth tried to rouse her.

Panic set in. Without thinking, Elizabeth bolted downstairs, stopping only to don her coat and wrap Lottie inside. Then she ran out the door and down the lane.

Carson woke to a pounding on his door and a frantic female voice calling his name. Through the discombobulation of being jolted awake suddenly, he recognized the voice.

Elizabeth?

He stumbled out of bed, instantly alert. Pulling the door open, he saw her on the other side, tears streaming down her cheeks. His eyes went at once to the bundle in her arms, wrapped under her coat. Even from there, he could see that something was wrong.

He held out his arms. Elizabeth placed the baby in them, then began wringing her hands. "She won't wake up."

Carson securely Lottie in the crook of one arm, then placed his other around her distraught mother. "Come on. Let's take her to the infirmary and see what's going on."

He'd never been more thankful to live in the apartment above his workplace. Fear for the little girl who'd come to mean a lot to him pulsed through his body, but he forced himself to enter doctor mode. Lottie was obviously feverish. When they hurried into the infirmary, he placed the baby on an examination table before unwrapping her from the blanket. As the cold air touched her skin, she let out a wispy cry. She still didn't open her eyes, but at least he knew she was responsive. Methodically, he examined her, trying to keep his emotions from running over.

"Elizabeth, I need you to bring in some snow from outside. Clean snow, preferably."

She nodded, her face stained with tears. The sight jarred him, searing itself into his mind as she left the room with a small bucket. He closed his eyes, throat working. "Please let me help them."

The quiet prayer echoed in the infirmary. A tiny cry made him open his eyes. Lottie looked up at him, her gray-green eyes watery, her cheeks red, and her forehead damp with sweat. Carson wanted to hold her, to nestle her against his chest, but that would not be good for her fever. He needed to get her temperature down quickly.

Elizabeth returned, bearing a snow-filled bucket. Carson thanked her, then began packing snow into strips of cloth that he then laid around the baby. Lottie cried in protest as the cold packs touched her body. The sad cries twisted his heart, and from the look on Elizabeth's face, it was doing the same to her. But he knew this would help, even if it pained him to do so.

Hours passed as he worked to bring down her temperature. She fussed constantly, with nothing to console her. Elizabeth tried nursing her, but the baby wouldn't eat. Carson could tell when Elizabeth began to feel uncomfortable as her body continued to produce milk that wasn't being emptied. He found a pump that Faith had brought to Hope Valley after a maternity class and gently instructed Elizabeth on how to use it. The relief in her eyes after the contraption quelled her discomfort eased his emotional ache slightly.

Around midday, Lottie fell into a fitful sleep. Her fever had lessened, though she was still clearly sick. Carson wrapped her in a blanket as Elizabeth prepared to take her home. "She'll be more comfortable in a familiar environment," he said, handing the baby to her mother. "I'll walk you home."

Elizabeth nodded. He slipped an arm around her shoulders in a protective gesture that he found felt natural. Together, they made their way to her row house. She was quiet as they walked. When they reached her house, she swallowed and turned to him. "What if she gets worse?"

He read the fear in her eyes. Desperate to drive it away, he pulled her into his arms. "I'll make sure the Coulters know what's going on. If anything happens, you can send Lee to get me in his car." He drew back only far enough to look into her eyes. "But I think she's going to be okay, Elizabeth. Babies get sick all the time, but I know how terrifying it is since this is her first illness. Keep her cool and try to feed her. I'll come back every few hours to check on you both."

Something shone in her eyes, something he couldn't read. She stood on tiptoe, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "I don't know what I'd do without you."

The murmured words made his heart flip. He impulsively cupped her cheek with his hand. "And I don't know what I'd do without you."

The admission was the closest thing to a declaration he'd come to making. Elizabeth's lips parted slightly as she gazed up at him. He waited for her features to close off in response to his words, but they never did. Instead, her eyes softened. She reached up to cover his hand with hers. "You'll come back soon?" The words were a little raspy.

He nodded, love for her making his heart ache. "Yes, Elizabeth, I'll be back soon."

She smiled for the first time that day. "Good. Then I'll see you later."

He waited until she was safely inside, then turned to walk back to town. The whole time, he pondered their interaction on her porch. He wasn't sure what her words or gestures meant, but he could have sworn he saw something tender in her eyes, something that went beyond that of friends. Then again, the last twelve hours had been highly emotional. She might simply be grateful.

Carson nodded. Until she gave him a sign otherwise, he'd continue to consider their interactions as those of friends.

No matter how much he wished differently.

Carson was true to his word. He came by twice more the day Lottie fell sick, and the next day he was over frequently as well. By evening, Elizabeth knew he had to be tired, but he masked it well. She watched as he rocked Lottie back and forth. The baby was finally sleeping peacefully, her fever having broken just an hour ago. She was eating again and seemed to be on the road to recovery.

Elizabeth was thankful. She'd never felt that kind of panic before, but between Carson's calm medical attention and Lottie's recovery, she now felt only relief.

She watched Carson as he murmured a lullaby to her little girl. His strong hands held the tiny child so carefully, so tenderly. As she observed them, an ache nearly stole her breath. A sudden vision danced through her mind, one in which she and Carson worked together to raise Lottie. The thought felt strange and right at the same time. Elizabeth barely had time to register it before he looked at her. "Can I put her in her crib?"

Elizabeth shook herself and nodded. "Of course. This way." She led him up the stairs and into the nursery. Carson carefully placed Lottie in her crib, then covered her with a blanket. Elizabeth hovered nearby, watching her daughter's every movement. Carson smoothed the downy blonde hair back from Lottie's forehead. "Sleep well, sweet girl," he murmured, leaning down to place a kiss on her soft cheek. He then turned to Elizabeth, sympathy in his eyes. "How are you holding up?"

She let out a small sob, the emotions of the past couple days overwhelming her. She threw herself into his arms and held on tight. Carson's arms slipped around her in return. He held her close as she cried quietly, not wanting to wake Lottie. His hand stroked her hair. The gesture was a soothing one. Elizabeth soon stopped crying, resting against his chest and closing her eyes as his hand continued to thread through her tresses.

"That feels good."

A strangled sound left him. At the same time, she felt his heart beat faster against her cheek. "I … I need to go."

He released her, careful to make sure she was steady, but he didn't look at her. Instead, he all but bolted from the room.

Elizabeth stood in stunned silence before hurrying after him. She caught up as he lifted his jacket from a hook. "Carson, wait."

He slowly let go of the jacket, turning to face her with an air of reluctance. She moved closer. "What's wrong?"

"I just … I needed some air, that's all." He raked a hand through his hair. He still wouldn't look at her.

She stepped even closer. He inhaled sharply, moving backward until he bumped into the door. His eyes darted to her lips. "Elizabeth, I'm sorry, but I need a moment, before I do something I might regret." He snapped his mouth shut and closed his eyes with a groan.

Elizabeth felt a surge of emotion. Uncertainty shot through her. This felt like a critical moment, one that might determine their future. Was she brave enough to let herself feel again?

Take a chance.

Jack's voice again sounded in her head. Before she lost her nerve, Elizabeth wrapped her arms around Carson. "What is it you might regret?"

His breaths came rapidly as he opened his eyes. "I can't say." As if of their own accord, his eyes fell to her lips again, telling her exactly what he wanted and what he was resisting. Knowing he wouldn't step past that line without her express permission, Elizabeth made the first move.

She kissed him.

The sensation of kissing another man felt strange at first, but she quickly grew used to it. Carson's lips were stiff with shock for a moment. Then his mouth pressed back against hers, his arms encircling her and pulling her close as their lips slowly explored each other. When they pulled back, both were silent, processing what had just happened.

Finally, Carson blew out a breath, his arms tightening around her. "I love you," he whispered, his voice shaking. "Lord knows I've fought it, but I can't keep you ignorant of my feelings any longer. This could be a second chance for both of us." He rested his forehead against hers, cradling her shoulder blades in his hands. "Is that something you would be open to? A second chance at love?" His blue eyes were full of vulnerability. "With me?"

She placed a hand on his cheek, amazed at the feelings pulsing through her. How had she missed them all this time? Carson had been a rock in her life from the moment she learned of Jack's death. He'd been her friend, her confidante. He'd been there throughout her pregnancy and in her journey as a new mother. He had nursed her daughter back to health. He'd helped her through good and bad, and somehow she'd missed the fact that she was slowly falling for him.

Elizabeth couldn't place when it had happened. He'd become such a fixture in her life, it was easy to imagine him remaining there. She nodded, never breaking eye contact, wordlessly answering his question. She caressed his cheek, watching in amazement as love grew in his eyes. Tilting her chin up, she closed her own eyes, hoping he understood the silent invitation. Moments later, his warm lips covered hers again in a gentle, tender kiss.