Thanks to DraughtJunkman for his help. I hope you will enjoy this one.
Chapter 11 – Outside
Perhaps Ty Lee was right to insist.
As night fell, the stifling atmosphere of the day had given way to a pleasant breeze that enveloped the four of them as they walked through the crowded alleys of the capital.
Although the Solstice celebrations were over, the atmosphere in the streets remained cheerful and lively. Azula wondered if this was already the case during Ozai or Azulon's reigns.
She could have taken a liking to these outings where no one stared at her or lowered their eyes submissively and fearfully when she spoke. With a pang in her heart, she realized how much she would miss that carelessness when Ty Lee would leave in ten days.
Azula did not react very well when Ty Lee announced to her, letter in her hand, that Suki requested her return to Kyoshi Island.
"You understand Azula," she had told her, "I took the oath to the girls. I can't go as I want like this for this long!" she had tried to justify herself with a pleading tone to an Azula whose face remained resolutely grouchy and who stood in front of her, arms crossed over her chest, clicking her tongue impatiently.
Then Ty Lee had taken her hands in hers and pressed her forehead to that of the princess before whispering: "You are my best friend Azula. I'm not abandoning you. I'll come back; I swear. Please try to understand!"
She owed her that… Rolling her eyes and sighing, she finally let out an exasperated answer: "Okay, very well," before releasing herself from Ty Lee's grip.
Now she walked alongside Ty Lee and two dashing young men, weaving among the commoners through the narrow city streets.
She had to recognize that for once, Ty Lee had shown good judgment in choosing their partners.
Taking advantage of Ty Lee walking ahead, on Hikaru's arm, who was a tall and slender young man with rather fine features and serious eyes, she risked a glance at the one who was standing by her side and whom Ty Lee's lover had presented as his best friend.
Kojiro was a handsome boy with hair as dark as hers, with shapely lips and yellow eyes shining like the sun, much like Zuko's.
He introduced himself to her very gallantly, bowing respectfully.
"Nice to meet you Miyu," he had greeted her after Ty Lee introduced her to him under the name she and Azula had chosen to preserve her anonymity.
Since then they had only exchanged a few words but he was showing interest and was paying attention to everything she said. To tell the truth, she had felt herself blush once or twice when he gave her his charming smile, strangely similar to her brother's.
Once he complimented her on her hair and her outfit and she thanked him with a smile.
You little slut!
She turned abruptly, her eyes wide, only to see behind her the crowd of commoners, perfectly indifferent, who continued to advance along the crowded avenue.
It was nothing, it was probably one of those peasants who insulted some loose woman in the street. No doubt nobody was talking to her.
It wasn't him.
You aren't hurting anyone. You can spend an evening with a nice boy without feeling bad. Nothing will happen anyway.
"You have to stay pure for the Fire Lord."
Azula pushed the voices out of her head as she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She wasn't doing anything wrong. She was just spending a pleasant evening with her friend and two nice boys. She wasn't thinking wrong.
What if he tries to do something to us?
Like Father?
"...to stay pure for the Fire Lord..."
"Shut up!" she thought, teeth clenched, jaw trembling.
"Miyu, are you all right?"
She turned her head to see Kojiro's caring face watching her strangely. She realized with horror that she must have spoken out loud.
The voices fell silent again.
They had left the crowded alleyway and ended up in a quiet, little square similar to the one where she and Ty Lee had painted their lanterns a few days earlier. A modest sentry box stood there, adorned with small, illuminated garlands. Behind the counter, a man wearing a headband was busy cutting fruits into very thin and strictly identical slices with a particularly sharp knife.
The sight of the instrument brought to her mind the hated image of Mai, no doubt curled up in Zuko's arms on the sofa in their bedroom or in the patio where they must have spent the day.
Bitterness gripped her heart.
In front of the stall, a row of tables allowed customers to sit down to enjoy fruit skewers and squeezed juices.
"Miyu?"
This time it was Ty Lee's voice. Kojiro's question had caught her attention and she approached Azula to take her hand and whisper:
"Is everything okay?"
"Yes, yes, I'm fine," the princess replied in an uncertain voice, forcing herself to smile at the two boys who looked at her strangely behind Ty Lee. I just got a little dizzy. It's probably the crowd, and the heat of the day."
"We're going to stop here," Hikaru announced in his deep, penetrating voice. "Miyu can rest, and we can cool off. These are the best freshly squeezed fruit juices in town."
Kojiro turned his head to Azula and gave her a charming smile to which she responded shyly. With a little nod of his head, he invited her to walk past him, and she accepted the arm he offered her.
He guided her to the bench where she sat down with Ty Lee as the two men went to get their drinks.
"Aren't they absolutely charming?" Ty Lee immediately asked with her usual enthusiasm, leaning over to her. "Have you seen Kojiro? That man is dazzling! If I had met him first… Haha! But no, I'm kidding, I leave him to you!"
"You can take him Ty Lee, I don't care," Azula replied in a gloomy tone, letting her gaze wander around the small square as if she were trying to spot someone she knew.
"Oh, come on Azula! Try to have a little fun! I know you're sad, but you can't stop living because of a boy who didn't want you. Absolutely every other man would dream of having you! Why are you focusing on the one you can't get? Do you want to spend your life hopelessly waiting for a love that never comes?"
…stay pure for the Fire Lord.
Kojiro and Hikaru were already coming back, huge mugs filled in their hands, sparing Azula having to answer. They had ordered a bottle of sake for themselves, and they handed the juices to the two girls who thanked them politely.
Kojiro took the seat next to Azula and with a snap of his fingers a small flame appeared which he brought closer to the wick of the candle that throned in the middle of their table in a globe of polished glass.
Azula noticed the smug look on his face when he caught her gaze.
Miyu wasn't supposed to be a firebender. It had seemed wiser to them not to mention the fact that Azula was a bender. The unique color of her flames would have immediately betrayed who she was.
Therefore, Azula feigned a small exclamation of admiration. As long as you spend the evening with these boys, you might as well have a little fun, she thought.
"How talented you are Kojiro! I have always dreamed of being a firebender! At what age did your bending come to you?" she questioned, feigning fascination.
He strutted and with the same perfectly maddening smile, he replied:
"At five and a half. My whole family was amazed. Usually bending doesn't manifest until the age of seven. I was the youngest of my siblings."
"Incredible!" echoed loudly Azula, who had made her first flame burst before the age of three.
She made sure to give her face an expression of blissful admiration which she supposed was quite convincing when Kojiro puffed out his chest self-importantly.
And to think that she had found him charming… He was like all the others: a fop devoid of the slightest talent and full of himself!
Ty Lee watched the scene a little anxiously. No doubt she had recognized the sycophantic tone 'the princess usually reserved for those she wanted to ridicule.
She gave Azula a tearful look that widened her storm-colored eyes. The princess relented, anxious not to hurt her friend.
She decided to give Kojiro a chance to redeem himself. He wasn't the first boy she'd met who felt the urge to boast in her presence.
Zuko is not like that.
...stop thinking about Zuko!
Zuko, lying on Mai in their huge bed, panting and covered in sweat. Mai, a smirk curling her thin lips, reopening her slanted eyes from time to time to stare at Azula, alone in the darkness of their room.
Why did it always have to hurt so much?
Mai, she had believed, was a settled case. She hadn't set a foot in the palace for weeks. Why this sudden return? Had she really found the strength to forgive Zuko? That didn't seem like her.
Did Azula's pitiful attempt at enraging her earlier have the desired effect? Maybe she was so mad with her and Zuko that she had finally gone home?
"So Miyu," Kojiro called out, pulling her out of her thoughts. "You didn't tell me where you come from. What does your father do?"
In front of them, Ty Lee and Hikaru no longer listened to them. The acrobat was feeding the young man from her own glass and when the juice ran down his chin, they both chuckled.
Turning her eyes away from this exasperating spectacle, Azula preferred to answer her date's question: "My father is a wealthy merchant. A former swordsman who converted to selling arms instead of using them following a rather serious injury. I have a brother who is two years older than me, and I was born in the colonies. My father brought us back to the capital when I was eight, when our mother died...
"Oh, I'm sorry," answered Kojiro who didn't sound sorry at all.
"Yes, it was very sad. Now I help my father in his store and sometimes I go with him to make deliveries to the palace. My brother got married and no longer lives with us."
It was amazing how easily the lies came to her. This idiot believed all her words. The feeling was quite exhilarating.
"At the Palace?" repeated Kojiro who never took his eyes off her, apparently fascinated by the beauty of her features, "Have you ever met the Fire Lord?"
"Yes. I saw him once or twice."
"So, is he really as they say?"
"How?" she asked, frowning.
"You know… a little wobbly?" And he smirked, covering the left part of his face with his hand to suggest the scar that adorned her brother's.
"Not at all!" Azula snapped in a suddenly harsh tone that she had trouble controlling. "The Fire Lord is a very charismatic and very attractive man. His scar doesn't detract from his beauty, on the contrary!"
Kojiro laughed as he approached her:
"Looks like you like him, eh?"
"Not at all, it's just that… I'm loyal to the Fire Lord."
"What about the princess?" he asked.
Azula froze a bit, fighting against the rush of blood that was coming to her cheeks.
"The princess?" she asked, swallowing hard.
"They say she is a woman of incredible beauty."
"That's what they say," Azula answered.
"Have you ever seen her?"
"Yes, I saw her. It is true that she is very elegant."
"Apparently, she's as dangerous and crazy as she is beautiful."
Azula fought with all her strength not to betray the rage that was rising in her. She shifted a bit on her bench to get away from him. Her silence and her closed face did little to deter him: "It seems she spent three years in a madhouse after trying to kill her brother. No one understands why he brought her back to the Capital. They also say that she is a witch and that she bewitched him and that is how she forces him to keep her near him!"
Azula felt the electricity itch on her fingertips, ready to burst out and strike this reckless boy. Ty Lee, who had been busy kissing her suitor a second earlier, must have sensed the tension in the air. With the sound of a suction cup being pulled loose, she freed herself from Hikaru's arms to observe the scene with worried eyes.
"They even say that the Fire Lord sleeps with her. Can you imagine?" Kojiro added giving his charming face a look of outraged revulsion.
It was Ty Lee's intervention that kept her from reacting.
"Have you finished your drinks?" she asked without looking at Azula who had not touched her glass and whose chest was rising rapidly in anger. "How about we go to the canal? This is where all the young people meet to party!"
The boys nodded strongly and stood up, taking with them the bottle of sake they had ordered and brought back the glasses to the counter.
Ty Lee took advantage of their moving away to approach Azula and take her arm.
"Hush, Azula… calm down. Don't pay him any attention. It's the kind of scandal that people like to invent to talk about kings. Nobody really believes it."
Azula, who was still trying to regain her composure, did not look at her.
So, Ty Lee knew. The rumors had finally reached her. Azula should have known. Ty Lee was talking to everyone at the palace. It was inevitably.
"I know full well that you and Zuko would never do anything so... disgusting. People who say that don't know what they're talking about. They are fools looking for a bit of sensationalism! Zuko is your brother, how could you..."
Then she stopped abruptly, her gaze vague. Her lips continued to move, silently speaking the words she was about to say out loud. A confused look gradually spread over her doll face.
"He sees me more as a friend... a sister..." she stammered.
Azula opened her mouth to speak, but she was unable to utter a word. Before she could help it, she looked away sharply so as not to see the accusing expression on her friend's face.
That was probably all the confession Ty Lee needed.
Azula risked a glance at her. They stared at each other for a few interminable seconds.
"Azula…" she whispered.
"Ty Lee…" she began in a pleading tone.
She was saved by the two boys who were waiting for them, further away.
"Are you coming girls?" Kojiro called out, already entering an alley with Hikaru.
Azula took the opportunity to turn away from Ty Lee and, after a last panicked glance in her direction, ran to join the boys.
The acrobat stood there for a few seconds, apparently unable to move, her arms hanging stupidly at her sides. Then, as Hikaru waved his hand out to her, she hesitantly joined them.
Taïma was waiting in the living room, a steaming cup of tea in front of her, her hands resting quietly on her knees.
"The Fire Lord will arrive in a few minutes, Master Taïma," the butler announced, "Can I bring you something while you wait?"
"No thank you, that will be fine. I will wait for him here."
The butler bowed back and closed the door behind him.
Taïma returned her attention to the moucharabieh windows from which she could see the dusk light falling on the Caldera.
Although the sight of a bloody sky always seemed so dazzling to her, she dreamed once again of the emerald hues of the northern lights that she and her sisters loved so much to witness when they were children, in the North.
It had been over three years since she visited home. Every day of her life for all this time had been devoted to the health of the princess of the Fire Nation.
Taïma was not complaining. Zuko had welcomed her like a queen and she enjoyed the respect of everyone in the palace. The suite he had given her was larger than the family home she had grown up in with her five sisters and her parents in the North.
During her visits, Katara had taught her advanced fighting movements that she could practice freely in the training yard, no longer being subject to Northern Water Tribe laws prohibiting women from practicing their waterbending for purposes other than healing.
Still, she sorely missed the frozen lands and snow-capped mountain peaks of her country. As well as her friends and her sisters.
At thirty-two, Taïma had never married. She had never expressed the desire and did not regret this choice.
Although there was still a long way to go, Zuko's efforts to change mindsets in the Fire Nation made her life easier here than in the Northern Water Tribes.
Loving women when you were one yourself was not yet well received at the Caldera, neither more nor less than elsewhere. But at least, thanks to Zuko, homosexuality was no longer a crime punishable by death.
It was also what had prompted her to accept Zuko's request to come and settle here. Taïma could finally be herself and Zuko had the delicacy to close his eyes to her love affairs, even ensuring she had all the discretion she needed.
So she had blossomed here for a while.
But lately, anguish took hold of her.
The princess was not doing well, it was obvious.
Azula was not a healthy person overall. Taïma didn't believe that she even knew what simple happiness was.
But for a year Azula had been able to have an almost normal social life which had been enabled to her through the near perfect formula that she had developed with the help of Katara.
Despite Azula's stubborn character, her sarcasm, and her obvious contempt for the people of other nations - starting with the Water Tribe people - Taïma had begun to feel a genuine affection for her.
Pity first allowed her to overcome her fears and her resentment towards this young girl who embodied all the horrors that the Fire Nation had inflicted on her people. When she thought back to the first months spent in the asylum, she felt like her heart was held in a vice.
Never had she seen someone so hopelessly unhappy. Azula's psychological distress was abysmal.
During the first months, they had hardly been able to communicate. Following the trauma of her isolation, Azula had been uncontrollable, sometimes attacking anyone who approached her, other times shriveling into a corner of her cell like a wounded animal wanting to be left alone to die.
Then the treatment had arrived, brought by Katara, Taïma had administered it to her immediately and the dementia attacks had gradually spaced out. Azula still suffered from hallucinations at times, but the hysterical attacks were rarer.
Taïma had managed to communicate with the sixteen-year-old girl and discovered a complex and devious personality that had fascinated her, a brilliant intelligence but also a deeply wounded soul with a thirst for love and recognition that she had rarely seen in her life.
Azula often refused to share her life with others, but step by step, with a lot of patience and subtlety, thanks to her knowledge of hypnosis as well, Taïma had managed to gain her confidence little by little which enabled her to understand Azula. She had started talking about her mother, her brother, her friends who had betrayed her. But never about her father. Never. Even under hypnosis.
Taïma had always refused to press her about this, fearing that she would trigger a new crisis comparable to the one that had overwhelmed her when Zuko had entrusted her with the arduous task of taking care of his younger sister.
She was convinced that in the princess' mind, Ozai was the cause of deep trauma. Obviously, she wasn't ready to talk about it. Taïma wasn't even sure she remembered it.
For months, Azula hardly spoke of her mother.
She knew that Zuko had put in unimaginable efforts and spent lavishly to find Ursa. But the woman seemed to have disappeared.
Taïma often wondered whether or not it was a good thing that Azula no longer brought up the subject. Had she accepted that her relationship with the woman who had given birth to her ended now?
It seemed to her that, thanks to Zuko, the princess had filled this emotional hole which had dug a gaping hole in her heart.
First Taïma was delighted to see the birth of a sincere affection between them. Zuko had been extraordinary with Azula. Showing patience, understanding and tenderness, attentive to all the advice of her doctors, he had succeeded in restoring her faith in love.
Probably too much... yes, Taïma was delighted to see their chaotic relationship blossom into something more. But today, this proximity was a real cause for concern. And the conversation she had had with the Fire Lord a few days before had confirmed all her fears.
The young healer could not have said exactly when the affection between Zuko and Azula had ceased to be purely brotherly. For Azula, it was hard to say. No doubt the fact he was her brother had never really influenced her feelings.
Taïma was not blind and had noticed the change in Azula's behavior over the past few months. She had seen it in her body language, in her looks, how Azula sought to get closer to her brother, in a way that was not very orthodox. She had chosen not to worry about it. Azula was acting weird with everyone.
But seeing Zuko play into her hands was more of a concern.
His interest in his sister and his overprotectiveness went beyond what was acceptable. The gestures and looks they exchanged had, frankly, become inappropriate.
Maybe Ty Lee was right in offering to take Azula on a trip with her. At first this idea had seemed risky to Taïma. Azula hadn't been stable for long enough. However, seeing how things were going between the princess and her brother, it seemed to her that putting some distance between them was now a necessity.
The Kyoshi Warrior's friendship was extremely precious, possibly the only healthy and genuine relationship Azula had in her life. It was thanks to Ty Lee that Taïma was finally able to see Azula again after weeks of silence and refusal.
Their last encounters had worried her. Azula was showing signs of mental instability again. Mild symptoms, of course. But Taïma, who knew her well, had seen it by her irritability, her shifty looks, the nervous tics that sometimes troubled her lovely face, the way she scratched her hands during their interviews. By the mutilations under her wrists.
Taïma had the intuition that this emotional state must have something to do with Zuko. Then, like everyone else, she had heard the rumors. She didn't take long to see the truth in them.
Finally, barely two weeks ago, Zuko had come to talk to her. Deeply affected and upset, he had told her in detail what had happened in Azula's room, how she had tried to seduce him, how she had touched and kissed him, but also how he had rejected her.
But what bothered the healer the most was less what he had told than what he hadn't told and what she had read between the lines.
He had firmly denied when she asked him if he had ever wanted his sister for a moment that night. He admitted that he was slow to react but assured that no such thoughts had crossed his mind. Until now. He had told her about the dreams that tormented him and which he wanted to get rid of at all cost.
Seeing that he needed reassurance above all, she had advised him not to take these phantasm too seriously. Dreams could not be controlled and could be the result of trauma. They did not necessarily reflect unconscious desires.
Zuko had seemed so relieved... so she had chosen to stop there before advising him to put some distance between them once she regained her senses.
There was a knock on the door and she looked up to see him enter.
His closed face betrayed great annoyance. She got up immediately to greet him, but he made her sit down with a vague wave of his hand. He sat down in turn, facing her in a horseshoe armchair, both hands clasped in front of him.
"Did you ask to see me?" he started.
"Yes Zuko, I would like to talk to you about the Princess. I don't want to hide from you that I'm very worried," she started without preamble.
"You're not the only one..." he sighed.
And he settled himself back in his seat, his arms crossed over his chest, his face even more scowling than usual.
"Zuko ... you seem preoccupied... do you want to talk to me about something first?"
"No. Nothing at all. Go ahead, I'm listening to you," he assured her.
Hesitantly, she went on: "Well, so as I was saying I'm very worried about the..."
"She's out! She left the palace!" he suddenly exploded.
Taïma was speechless in amazement.
"When you say she went out, you mean..."
"With Ty Lee! She brought her with her to party in the streets of the Capital. Her, a princess!"
"And it's a problem because..."
"They are accompanied. By Ty Lee's friends."
"Men?
"Yes. Two."
"I see..."
Zuko bit the inside of his cheeks to hold back his anger. Taïma could see the fury dancing in the golden glow of his eyes.
"I feel you are worried. Are you afraid that something will happen to her?"
Zuko looked at her with large round eyes, as if he found her question particularly stupid.
"Of course, don't you?"
"I might be worried if she went out alone. But she's with Ty Lee who is an outstanding fighter. Azula herself is a powerful warrior. I don't think you have any reason to worry about their safety."
"It's not for her safety that I worry..." he muttered. Speaking like this, his arms crossed over his chest, he looked strangely like a little boy who had been deprived of his dessert.
"Then... why?"
"For her honor! For her reputation!" he burst out. "Has she become stupid? You know the kind of rumors going around about her! What will people think if they see her strolling in the common districts on the first idiot's arm! This is not the place for a noble's daughter, even less a princess!"
Taïma paused. It was not the first time that the Fire Lord, who prided himself on progressive views on womenfolks condition and rights, was so conservative. He, who said he wanted to reject the patriarchal system, was abusing it when it came to his little sister.
"Are you afraid that through it your honor will be questioned?" she risked.
"I… yes. No. No that's not…" he replied, visibly taken aback.
"Do you think the Princess should preserve herself until her wedding?"
"I... no, well yes. I don't know. She has the right to live her life as she wants, but... why with him? Why now?"
The healer swallowed, took a deep breath, and asked the question that had been burning her lips since their last conversation.
"Zuko, are you somehow afraid that she might feel desire for other men than you?"
The look of disbelief that appeared on the young ruler's face might have seemed comical under other circumstances. He couldn't have seemed more shocked if she had thrown a squirt of ice water in his face. He shifted in his seat, seemingly bewildered, and leaned over her, eyes wide.
"What? How... how can you say something so..."
"Tell me if I'm wrong but you seem to fear that the princess will have sex with this man who accompanies her, don't you?"
This time, Zuko didn't have the audacity to deny. He just nodded, then answered:
"Yes but not for the reasons you think, it worries me because I'm afraid for her, for her honor…"
"As you said so well, Azula has the right to live her own life. You can't spend yours worrying about her choices. The two of you have to move on if you want your relationship to evolve into something healthier."
"There is nothing unhealthy in my relationship with Azula," Zuko cried furiously. She's the one who… she's talking rubbish, once again! She came to provoke me this afternoon when I was with Mai, with her allusions, her disgusting innuendos..."
"And how did Mai react?"
"She seems to find it very natural that Azula goes out at night with Ty Lee, without protection and without an escort. She's just jealous!" he added, frowning to reflect his disapproval.
"Does she have reason to be?"
"You're not going to do it again! I thought you called me to talk about Azula, not to analyze me!"
"That's what we're doing. I think in your case, when we talk about one, the other is also involved."
"I don't understand what you're saying."
"Zuko, I'm going to ask you just one question. You don't have to answer if you don't want, but if you do, be as sincere as possible..."
She paused for a moment, apprehensively awaiting the Fire Lord's reaction. He seemed to think for a moment then, curiosity winning the day, nodded, looking down. Taïma swallowed then asked her question:
"Zuko, do you somehow think you want your sister? I mean...sexually."
He reacted as she had feared. Wrong.
He leapt from his chair immediately, a fiery dagger bursting from each of his two clenched fists in front of him. He made them disappear almost immediately, but smoke continued to escape from the knuckles of his fingers.
"How dare you? I like you Taïma and you know that I'm deeply grateful to you for everything you've done for Azula but remember who you are talking to!"
This time, she thought it wiser to surrender. Zuko clearly wasn't ready, and then, why risk angering him for an answer she thought she already knew?
"I beg your pardon, Your Highness, I overstepped the mark."
She bowed in contrition and Zuko sat back down, arms crossed over his chest again, a look of defiance imprinted on his face.
"Tell me about Azula," he commanded.
She obeyed. She told him about her last sessions with the princess and how she had found her elusive, impulsive, nervous and sometimes incoherent.
"I don't want to alarm you or make any assumptions, but I think the princess is relapsing."
Zuko's attitude had changed as she told him her story. He had uncrossed his arms and the anger in his eyes had given way to deep concern.
"Do you think she is no longer taking her treatment?" he asked.
"Ty Lee assures me that she takes it in front of her every morning."
"So, you think it no longer works?"
"That's a possibility. Perhaps it might suffice to readjust the dosage. Your sister may have developed a habituation. I don't want to worry you too much. But be aware that if this is the case, if her disease starts again, it may be necessary to take unpleasant measures."
"What kind of measures?"
Taïma knew he wasn't going to like the answer, but as a doctor she had to be as transparent as possible.
"I think the princess needs a change of scene. The latest events have weakened her enormously and she needs a healthier environment to help her regain her senses."
Zuko stared at her without blinking.
"Do you want me to get rid of her again?"
"Not get rid of her," she corrected. "I think you should send her on vacation for a while. It can only benefit the both of you... all three," she added, thinking of Mai. "Your wife is also suffering from this situation. If you want to preserve your relationship with your wife and with your sister, this possibility must be considered."
"Azula will never forgive me if I abandon her again! You know how she reacts when she feels rejected. It could destroy her!"
"You don't need to present it to her like that. Let her go on a trip with Ty Lee, let her meet people. Your role is not to overprotect her, Zuko."
"Of course it is! I am her older brother and the Fire Lord! She is sick and unstable. She only has me in the world! I have to protect her."
"You have to, but you're not doing it the right way. Your role, Zuko, is not to preserve her from the outside world, but to encourage her to find her place there."
Zuko stood up, his furious expression returning to his golden eyes. A shadow passed over his face. For the first time since she had known him, she was struck by how much he looked like his father.
"Her place is in the palace, here, by my side," he said in a voice thrumming with rage. "And yours is in your lab. You must find the right dosage to get my sister stable again. Katara will be here in a few days and I want you to put all of your energy into finding a solution together. If you still talk to me about sending my sister away from me, Taïma, I warn you that I will stop turning a blind eye to your little love affairs. Personally, I don't care, but I really doubt the Fire Sages or your peers in the Northern Water Tribe are as tolerant as I am!"
With that, he paced the room and quickly reached the entrance. He left, slamming the door behind him.
Taïma, left alone, sighed bitterly and returned her attention to the window. An ink-colored sky had covered the world.
Outside, night had fallen.
On the path that led to the edge of the canal, the attention of the four young people was attracted by a crowd in the middle of a large, cobbled square surrounded by multi-story houses. Families flocked to their balconies to find out the origin of this growing fuss.
"Let's go see," Kojiro commanded, taking Azula by the arm.
Too dismayed to be outraged at his rudeness, she let herself be led through the dense crowd that thronged around what must have been an improvised stage mounted on trestles.
"What's going on?" she asked Kojiro as she stood up on her toes to catch a glimpse of something.
Worried exclamations and other sounds of enthusiasm erupted all around them.
"They are the Sons of Agni!"
"Didn't you get their flyer?"
Azula looked around for Ty Lee but the crowd had momentarily separated them.
Or she's gone...
Ty Lee had remained strangely distant since they had left the small place they had sat in earlier, her cheerful and cordial demeanor giving way to a preoccupied and somber look very unlike her.
Azula remembered with a violent pang in her heart the dismayed expression she had seen on Ty Lee's face, the glimmer of understanding shining in her large mist-colored eyes.
She knows… She too will abandon you now.
There was only her and Kojiro left.
What was the use of moping? There was nothing she could do about Ty Lee right now. Instead of looking for her, she returned her attention to the stage in front of her. Too short to see anything, she felt the frustration escalate. If at least she could have used her bending to generate flames at the tips of her feet! She would have propelled herself to one of these balconies from where she could have seen the scene in peace, without having to endure the wetness of the others' bodies, the tip of their elbow which sank into her ribs, nor their toothless smirks, inches from her face. Was that what it felt like to be a commoner? How awful!
"I think someone's going to speak," Kojiro cried, leaning over her to make himself heard.
He must have been right because the hubbub gradually faded to leave room for curious or excited whispers.
"My friends!" began a deep, cavernous voice that immediately reminded her of her father's. Her body shook with a great shiver that she repressed painfully.
"Who is he?" she asked Kojiro who was still holding her hand.
"A guy. He's quite tall and he wears a funny white mask with yellow, almond-shaped eyes," he described. "He wears a large red robe, like those worn by nobles at court."
"That answers my question perfectly satisfactorily," she let out between gritted teeth.
Not seeing anything, she concentrated on listening to the speech of the newcomer.
"I am honored and happy to see so many of you this evening. My friends, Citizens of the Fire Nation, my brothers and sisters, I will get right to the point. You know, like me, that recently, disturbances in our colonies have caused an influx, a wave, what am I saying? A tsunami of migrants who throng to our doors, bringing with them their impurity, their diseases and their violence."
Exclamations arose around them, several people loudly showing their approval.
"My friends," the stranger continued, "I know how you feel. I know your concerns. And I wish I could appease them. But be sure that they are justified. The enemy is upon us and threatens our women, our children, our culture and our civilization. Don't believe those who will tell you that these are our brothers. Life in the colonies has bastardized them! They come back to us, covered in the muddy soil of the Earth Kingdom. Their ancestors perverted their lineage by mating like animals with Earth Kingdom people! Today it is their children, products of these unnatural unions, that knock on our door and steal our jobs, rape our women, plunder our businesses and our culture, and threaten the peace we aspire to."
The cheers of the crowd grew in intensity. Out of the corner of her eye, Azula saw a few people walking away quickly, looking disgusted. But the vast majority of the audience remained there, captivated by the insane speech of this madman.
How could it be that the crowd reacted so favorably to the nauseating speeches of this agitator? Why didn't the guard intervene? Kojiro, next to her, listened to the speech, arms folded, brow furrowed and eyes narrowed in intense concentration.
She herself had long believed in the obvious superiority of her Nation to know what collection of ideological nonsense this speech contained.
Giving the reactions of the crowd, the orator was not at his first meeting.
"Don't listen those who will tell you that all men belong to one race which is mankind. Millenia ago, the gods have bestowed upon us, Lords of Fire, the most powerful gift that nature has to offer: fire! Destructive fire, devastating! Purifying fire! It lives in each of you, Citizens of the Fire Nation, benders and non-benders. All of you, through the purity of your race, you carry within you the possibility of giving birth to this power! It's up to you to ensure the purity of our lineage by ensuring at all times to adopt a hostile attitude towards these strangers. No longer will our blood be soiled by the mud which circulates in the veins of our neighbors in the Earth Kingdom, nor our fire ruined by the stagnant water which runs through the arteries of the peoples of the Northern and the Southern Tribes! It's up to you, citizens, to fight to preserve the purity of our lineage, to destroy the ghost of degeneration. Join us my friends, join the Sons of Agni and together, let us give back all its value to our race, the race of the children of fire, the pure race, the dominant race!"
"The Sons of Agni?" Azula muttered for herself.
Was Zuko even aware of the existence of this faction? A few weeks ago, she was sure he would have told her about it. But things had changed. Chasing the thought of Zuko away, she looked up at her partner's face. To her dismay, she saw that he was laughing.
"Don't wait for our leaders to intervene," the orator was speaking. "Although belonging to a lineage of great purity, the blood of the royal family was corrupted from the moment the Fire Lord denied his father and surrounded himself with enemies. The Citizens of the Fire Nation are today ruled by water and earthbenders! Don't place any hope, nor confidence in a decadent government that advocates tolerance for vile, abject and criminal practices."
"Do you know that, under his roof, the Fire Lord shelters water and earthbenders, those mainly responsible for the fall of the Phoenix King? That he tolerates, within his walls, that one indulges in unnatural loves and lusts?
Taïma. Azula's blood swirled around. Could this man know?
"…that the Fire Lord himself is wallowing in debauchery and lust, with none other than his monstrous and bloodthirsty sister! The Blue Flamed Demon, living proof of the corruption that crept into the royal family, has perverted your king. If the Fire Lady Mai does not soon give birth to an heir, your next Fire Lord could be an incest-born bastard, the product of a sordid and impure union. Do you want this?"
Disgusted and furious exclamations arose all around them.
Azula felt all of her blood drain from her cheeks and felt like her entrails had been sucked out. Her body and brain seemed strangely empty.
Distraught, she scanned the crowd again to catch a glimpse of Ty Lee. But there was no sign of her friend. Could it be that she hadn't heard that?
I have to tell Zuko! He must know!
"Come on Miyu, let's get out of here," Kojiro said, taking her firmly by the arm.
"No! I want to hear what he has to say," she retorted, freeing herself with a sudden gesture.
He leaned over her and shouted in her ear: "Well, you are free to stay and be trampled by a delirious crowd. But I warn you that the cavalry is here to disperse us, so if you don't want to end up in a mash, run!"
Indeed, the atmosphere suddenly changed. The cheers and cries of approval had given way to indignant and panicked exclamations and Azula and Kojiro soon felt pushed back by an overwhelming force. Accepting the hand Kojiro held out to her, she grabbed it and they scampered off.
"Ty Lee! We need to find Ty Lee!"
But Kojiro was not listening. He sped through the crowd, dragging her behind him, elbowing to pass. Behind them, the sounds of explosions resounded. Azula guessed that members of the Imperial Guard must have arrived and that a fight had started between them and the Sons of Agni.
She tried to look back but took someone head-on. Her hand slipped from Kojiro's and she found herself on the ground. Already feet were trampling on her. She felt panic take hold of her.
Do something! Quickly!
Someone tripped over her, followed by another person, and she was quickly covered by several bodies that collapsed on top of her. Breathless, she called for help: "Ty Lee!"
She tried to free herself with the help of her bending, but the lack of air prevented her from doing so. All around her, panicked voices of people fleeing, asking for help, calling for a friend. Towards the platform, the fight continued.
She couldn't breathe at all. The bodies above her seemed to grow heavier with every second. Her eyesight began to blur.
Suddenly, an explosion sounded, and a dazzling light blinded her. Two seconds later, she was free but flabbergasted, gasping for air. She felt two strong hands grip her under the armpits and was lifted off the ground in an instant, then put back on her feet.
"Can you walk?," a man's voice asked right next to her.
Her eyesight was still too clouded with the suffocation, and she was unable to respond. So, she just nodded and a firm hand pulled her and led her away from the crowd, into a dark and almost deserted alley.
"These crazy people have been roaming the city for over a week on their trestles! Each time it ends like this! I am amazed that the Imperial Guard took so long to arrive. Usually, he doesn't have time to talk so much!"
Leaning forward, still panting for more air, her hands on her knees, Azula recognized the voice speaking to her. It was Kojiro who had come back to look for her in the crowd. It was probably he who had generated the fireball that had exploded above her, freeing her from the pile of bodies that were crushing her.
"Thank you... you saved me..."
"Oh, that's nothing! You should be more careful Miyu!" he replied almost modestly.
When she found the strength to look up at him, she saw in his satisfied face that he was delighted of his achievement.
"Have you seen Ty Lee and your friend?"
"No, not since we arrived in the square. But don't worry, they'll be fine. Can you walk? We should go further. It's dangerous here," he said, looking around them at the dilapidated houses with broken windows from which no light escaped.
"Okay," she conceded, although she would have preferred to sit down a bit to catch her breath. "But I'm going to need some help, I think I sprained my ankle."
Without waiting, he bent down to allow her to put an arm around his shoulder and he grabbed her by the waist. They trudged forward, Azula hopping on one foot. Their size difference would make the scene a bit grotesque. But that wasn't what worried Azula at the moment.
"Who are these men? I heard they were called..."
"The Sons of Agni," he finished for her. "A nationalist small group that began to make people talk about it some time ago, when new progressive laws appeared, such as the condemnation of honor killings within the family or the abolition of the death sentence for sodomists and tribades..."
"Don't use those terms in front of me!" she yelped, thinking of Taïma.
Legalizing love in all its forms had been one of the first measures Zuko took, encouraged by the Team Avatar, when he ascended the throne. Indeed, by consulting the archives of Ozai's reign, he had been mortified by discovering the number of victims of these traditionalist laws and the vile barbarism with which they were executed.
The measure had not been well received, as much by the Fire Sages as by some of Zuko's ministers and a part of the population. His opponents had dug one's heels in to obstruct this law and Zuko had only been able to convince them to abolish the death sentence in such cases. Love between two people of the same gender remained illegal in the Fire Nation.
Younger, Azula had shared these opinions. Like Ozai and like Azulon, she was convinced that this retribution was well deserved for those people who engaged in such disgusting and unnatural acts. Then she had fallen in love with her own brother. And she had met Taïma. Taïma who loved girls but who had saved her from her madness. She had discovered that one could love differently without being a monster. And her view started to change.
But if the law drafted by Zuko partially protected love between persons of the same sex, incest remained an unforgivable crime, a crime against the gods. Anyone who did so risked the death sentence. Was Zuko considering alleviating this sentence now that he himself was involved in such an affair with his sister?
Hearing the crowd's reaction when the orator spoke of her relationship with Zuko, the people of the Fire Nation were clearly not ready to tolerate such loves, not even among their leaders.
Kojiro and Azula ended up in a new alley, brighter. Passers walked quietly and old people were sitting on benches in front of their houses, leaning on their canes, watching the comings and goings of onlookers.
"Tell me more about the Sons of Agni," she ordered after a silence.
"There is not much to say, they are weirdos, I told you. They advocate a return to the traditional values of another time and are convinced of the superiority of "the pure race" as they call it... The massive arrival of migrants in recent weeks has given them more visibility and as people are scared, they listen to them."
"Zuko never mentioned them," she said absent-mindedly.
"Why would the Fire Lord tell you about this?" he asked in an astonished tone.
"Forget it," she replied harshly. "Let go of me for a moment. I need to sit down."
One of her ribs hurt her and she knew from experience that an impressive bruise was going to form. He let go and she sat down on the porch of an abandoned house. Then looking up at him, she asked: "You say they believe in the superiority of the pure race. What is it about?"
"It's about the original race of the Fire Nation. I mean, according to them. In short, they want to classify the population depending on specific physical criteria. Representatives of the pure race must have golden or brown eyes, fair skin and black hair. A bit like you in fact! You're a pure product of the pure race!" he said, laughing. "They would like you!"
Azula really didn't think there was anything to laugh about.
"I don't want nothing to do with these fanatics! I have never heard anything so stupid!"
"I believe they want to encourage pure race people to stay with each other and breed with each other. To avoid crossbreeding, you see. As in the colonies."
"I can't believe the Fire Lord didn't do anything to stop them!" she said indignantly, speaking more for herself than for Kojiro.
"Yeah…" said Kojiro, shrugging his shoulders, "Until then they weren't really making fur fly and then nobody really takes them seriously. But since the problems in the colonies and the arrival of migrants, people listen to them more. Don't worry, they are marginal! People come to listen to them because they distract them. I don't believe they represent a real danger tor the Nation."
"Did you hear what he said about Princess Azula? He called her..."
"'The Blue Flames Demon?' Yes! I'm aware! This is one of her many nicknames. With 'The Scourge of Ba Sing Se', 'The Caldera Viper', and more recently 'The Fire Lord's whore'! The poor girl has so much to worry about!"
"What do you mean?" she asked, trying to ignore the bubbling rage she felt growing in her stomach.
"The princess has been the target of a lot of criticism for some time. Everyone says she's the one making all the decisions right now. And it's because of her that the country is forced to pay tribute to the Earth Kingdom every year and that the settlers are driven out and persecuted in the colonies. Because the Fire Lord refuses to deliver her to the Earth Kingdom."
"And what would it change for them whether I... the princess is delivered to Ba Sing Se?"
"I think it's symbolic. The people of the Earth Kingdom crave justice, and the failure of the Harmony Restoration Movement has fueled their anger. The princess is a bit of a scapegoat that the people of Earth need to feel heard. "
Azula listened to him attentively. He had seemed a little superficial and silly to her earlier, but now she was surprised at the finesse of his political analysis.
"You seem well informed…" she told him.
"My father is passionate about politics," he replied humbly, maybe for the first time. "He's been explaining things to me since I was a kid. When I finish my military service, I would like to try a career in diplomacy."
He gave a charming smile to Azula who responded shyly. She stood up and dusted her clothes.
"I would like to find Ty Lee now. It's late... we have to go home."
"I think we have a better chance of finding them around the canal. This is where we were heading when we were distracted by the Sons of Agni. Come on!"
She accepted the hand he extended to her and winced when she put her foot on the ground. Her ankle was well and truly sprained.
It took a while for them to reach the docks lit by hundreds of lanterns where other couples were seated and a few groups of young people chatting merrily.
They paced along the river bank in search of Hikaru and Ty Lee but didn't find them. Finally, Kojiro offered to go sit in a quiet place to wait for them. Azula, who suffered from her sprained ankle and bruised rib, accepted with good grace. He led her to a bush where they sat down out of sight.
"How's your ankle?" Kojiro asked in a tone full of concern.
"I've known better," she replied, massaging the sore articulation. "Thanks again for your help..."
"It's nothing. I never miss the opportunity to save ladies in distress. Especially when they are as pretty as yourself..."
It was stupid and really, really awkward, but Azula blushed in spite of herself.
"Miyu," he called out in a shy little voice she had never heard before. "Would it be okay if I kiss you?"
She felt offended at first. How dare he? She was the princess! Then she remembered that he had no idea.
She had never kissed anyone, except for that stealthy kiss exchanged with the Admiral's son on Ember Isle years ago.
It didn't tempt her. She didn't see what benefit she could derive from it. Kojiro was staring at her, watching her answer, his bright yellow eyes focused on her mouth, waiting for her consent.
His irises were a bit paler than Zuko's perhaps, but aside from that their eyes were extraordinarily similar.
Zuko… She remembered him, comfortably seated on a couch, Mai snuggled against him. It was this image that decided her:
"Okay," she replied, blushing furiously. She was glad it was too dark for Kojiro to notice.
He moved a few inches closer, closing the distance between them, and put his hand on hers. He laid his other hand on Azula's cheek and closed his eyes before bringing his face closer to hers. Before she could think about what she had to do, he captured her lips in his.
It wasn't that bad. When she closed her eyes, she could almost imagine it was her brother kissing her.
That's why she let it go when he put the hand that was previously on her cheek on her shoulder and gently pushed her back so that she lay on her back, without their lips parting.
It was Zuko's long, slender, nimble fingers weaving their way under her tunic and wrapping around her waist. Zuko's tongue slipping into her mouth to play with hers.
You little slut!
Her father's voice had just come out of the void. Opening her eyes wide, she wanted to break the kiss, but the boy didn't seem to agree. Emboldening himself a bit, he leaned over her a little more, his body almost covering hers and bit into her lower lip with a groan. At the same time, she felt something hard press against her, between her legs.
Her whole body tensed brutally.
Above her, the indigo sky suddenly turned red. Scarlet, jagged clouds left bloody trails across the sky.
She wanted to push him away, but her arms and legs no longer obeyed her. She wanted to scream but only a strangled moan escaped her lips.
Shut up you little slut! Do you want everyone to hear you?
The silver moon had turned into a gigantic black disc haloed with a bright light.
"Mmmm! Mmmm!"
That was all she managed to object. But when he slipped a greedy hand under her pants and put a finger inside her, it was as if a dike had given way.
No no no no!
She bit savagely into Kojiro's tongue. Pushing an exclamation of pain, he immediately withdrew his hand but he didn't have time to back down as she was already propelling him away from her with a push of her feet on the boy's chest.
He was thrown back and landed on his seat.
Unimaginable rage consumed Azula as her amber gaze fell on the boy in front of her, who was looking at her with a distraught expression. She let out two dazzling blue flames from her palms that. She had time to see them reflect in Kojiro's panicked eyes, just before she threw herself on him like a fury.
With an impressive velocity, she pinned him to the ground, straddled him, and clamped her two scalding hands on either side of his face. The smell of burnt flesh immediately invaded her nostrils, but it didn't stop her. Overwhelmed by the fury, she barely heard the cry of horror escaping Kojiro's throat, his whole body contorting with pain. He struggled blindly, throwing his hands above him in an attempt to reach Azula, releasing random jets of flames; but the princess held her grab. Finally, he found her face and she felt a sharp pain as fingernails dug into her flesh, carving a gash on her right cheekbone.
She screamed furiously and raised the temperature under her hands.
Everything happened very quickly. Already Kojiro was struggling very weakly. Soon the howls were replaced by horrible, choking, nauseating rumblings.
She didn't release him though and just pressed harder, burning her palms and fingertips again. She thrust her scalded index finger into his eye-socket, screaming hard: "For the Fire Lord! For the Fire Lord!"
She was vaguely aware of the presence of other people around them, screaming, calling for help, or yelling at her to let go. The meaning of their words did not reach her brain clouded with rage and terror.
She wanted to tighten both hands around Kojiro's neck but didn't have time to secure her grip. Strong arms grabbed her and pulled her back.
Struggling with all her strength, she clenched her fists and released a blast of incandescent energy that erupted around her with an exploding sound, ejecting those standing beside her and trying to contain her.
New cries of panic sounded.
"Is he dead?"
"He doesn't breathe anymore!"
"Call the guard!"
"Go see how they're doing!"
Distraught, her eyes clouded with tears of rage, panting, Azula stood on all fours on the grass. Slowly, she tried to regain her senses, stood up and discovered the scene of carnage at her feet. Three bodies were lying on the grass, moving weakly. To these was added Kojiro's body, which lay still, arms strangely positioned around him, as if he wanted to cling to the grass under his back. She had just enough time to catch a glimpse of the mush of his face before a voice rang out a few feet from her.
"Catch her! She's a criminal!"
"She's crazy! She must be locked up!"
Her heart missed a beat. She hadn't practiced this technique for a long time and didn't know if she would succeed in such a state of panic. However she had to try, and quickly!
Simultaneously making jets of blue flames appear at the end of her hands and feet, she propelled herself into the air. She rose above the small crowd gathered around the inanimate bodies and fell a little further, landing gracefully on her heels, barely grimacing when her injured foot touched the ground.
"...blue flames!"
"Princess Azula!" someone yelled behind her.
She would have liked to stay here a bit to give her ankle time to recover.
No time for that!
Gathering all her courage and determination, she got up and, breathless, her forehead covered with sweat, her legs trembling, she scampered into the night, away from the calls for help that she still heard echoing behind her.
Above her, the crimson sky had regained its usual cerulean hue.