The screen showed a cartoon of a handsome man dressed as if he's on a talk show. "Why, hello there. I am Apollo, the Greek God of the Sun. That's right. The Greek myths are real. If you're watching this, then that means you managed to survive your journey to the safe haven that is Camp Half-Blood. But what's that? 'What's Camp Half-Blood' you ask? Well, I'm more than happy to tell you everything and then some.

"Eons ago, before the age of man, a race of demonic entities known as the Titans ruled the Earth, and the ruler of them all was Kronos, the worst of the worst. He was the father of the original gods, who he was told would someday overthrow him. To prevent this future from happening, Kronos all but one of his children. Zeus survived, and later returned to free his siblings. When he tricked Kronos into eating a rock, the Titan spewed out every god he devoured, and together, they overthrew the Titans. Most of them were imprisoned, and Kronos himself was cut into a thousand pieces with his own weapon and scattered across the deepest depths of the Underworld. Ever since the Titans' downfall, the gods have taken their places as rulers of the Earth, and Zeus became the King of the Gods.

"Now, you might have heard of some legendary demigods such as Hercules, Perseus, and much more. You see, a demigod is the child of a god and a human being. That's right. Most of the gods give into their primal urges and sleep around with humans. And sometimes, kids come out as a result. It's a trend that continues to this day. That's right, kid. YOU are a demigod! One was a mortal, but the other is an immortal being of great wisdom and power. But enough about me. Let's talk more about you.

"You see, all the Greek myths are real, and that includes the monsters. And given that demigods have a very unique odor that attracts them, that's like a dinner bell. Thankfully, we gods have provided the perfect sanctuary for you: Camp Half-Blood.

"Camp Half-Blood is a summer camp where demigods are welcome at. It's here where you can be safe from monsters, and during your stay, you will also train yourself so that when you do leave the camp for good, you'll be strong enough to defend yourself. You'll even have your own cabin which is made after your godly parent."

"So to recap… Gods are real, you're a demigod, and you gotta stay here at Camp Half-Blood or else you're monster chow. Good luck."

Once the film ended, Chiron turned on the lights to talk to Church. "What comes next is a musical number, but we don't need to go into that today. So what do you think?"

"…I'm sorry. Could you rewind to that last part?" Church asked.

"Which last part?"

"Oh, everything after 'I am Apollo'."

Chiron sighed. "I suppose this would take some personal explanation."

"I think I get it now." Church said. "Basically, one of my parents is a god?"

"Yes."

"Well, which one is it?"

"We don't know. All we know is that you're a demigod. And this amnesia thing happening to you will only make things more complicated. We'll only know who your godly parent is if and when they claim you."

"If and when?" Church asked. "What do you mean by that?"

"Well… the thing is, not every demigod can be claimed by their parent." Chiron said. "The gods are very busy with doing their part to manage the cosmos and…"

Church frowned. "And they're too busy to just raise their hands when someone asks 'who's kid is this'? So if no one's going to say I'm their son, then where am I going to be staying? Didn't that god in the film say each cabin was made by our parents?"

"Yes, but for those who are unclaimed like you, you will be staying at the Hermes cabin."

"Oh, this is effing bullshit." Church complained.

"If I had a drachmae for every time orientation ended with that sentence…" Chiron said. "Come. The camp director will want to have you logged in."

The centaur guided Church through the next door where Mr. D was. There with him were all the students he rounded up in the day: Grif, Simmons, Sarge, Lopez, Tucker, Caboose, and Donut.

"Mr. D, what is all this?"

"I'll tell you what it is, Chiron. These kids have made me a very upset god. Complete and utter disappointments."

"Love you too, Dad." Grif said.

"Thanks for volunteering for you and your new BFF, Baxter." Mr. D said.

"It's Dexter. Seriously, I'm your son. You can't even get my name right?"

"Whatever. You and Simons…"

"Simmons."

"Whatever! The two of you colluded with each other to not complete the obstacle course race."

"Objection!" Grif yelled out. "I've never colluded with anything in my life, and I refuse the implication!"

"Do you even know what collusion is?" Simmons asked.

"…I plead the fifth, your honor."

Mr. D growled quietly before turning to the son of Ares and his automaton. "Then there's this guy. Sarge."

"That's me." Sarge said proudly.

"Your name is Sarge?" Church asked.

"Yep. My grandpappy always told me to dress for the job you want. I figured I'd take it a few steps further."

"Right. Well, this punk broke into the Hephaestus Cabin, locked everyone out, and spent much of their materials to build a human-shaped automaton who can't even speak English."

"No me culpes. No pedi que me construyeran." Lopez said.

Sarge chuckled. "You can't be mad at a creative mind for adding a little culture to the camp."

"I'm not mad at a creative mind. I'm mad at you!" Mr. D yelled. "And Mr. Bucket…"

"It's Tucker."

"WHATEVER! You were caught at the Aphrodite Cabin five times in the past two weeks when you should been at other camp activities."

"Like what? Horseback riding?" Tucker asked. "Nobody rides horses anymore, Mr. D. What difference does it make?"

Mr. D gave an exhausted sigh. "And what's worse, you coerced uoung Mitchel here…"

"Michael. As in, my name is Michael J. Caboose."

"Whatever! You got him to help you!"

"Well, why am I here?" Donut asked.

"You're here because I have little to no patience for innuendos."

"In my endo?"

Mr. D growled. "My point exactly."

"Well," Chiron said, "Sounds like you've got a handful of a day, Mr. D."

"Don't start with me, Professor Hay for Breath." Mr. D said before seeing Church. "Who's this twerp?"

"Our latest camper." Chiron said. "Mr. D, this is Leonard Church."

"Lester Chad. Got it." Mr. D said.

"Dude, what is wrong with you?" Church asked.

"Don't mind him." Chiron said. "He's just a little cranky ever since Zeus assigned him to be the camp director."

"Assigned?" Mr. D asked. "More like he banished me! All I did was go on one date with a nymph that Zeus liked! Next thing I know, I'm teaching snot-nosed brats how to defend themselves without the slightest taste of fine wine, just Diet Coke! From godhood to camp master!"

"Godhood?" Church asked.

"Yes." Chiron said. "Mr. D here is actually Dionysus, the god of wine."

"And madness," Mr. D said, "Which is ironic considering that I'm surrounded by the worst demigods this camp has ever seen! If I have to deal with them for one more day, I am going to kill myself."

"Wait." Church said. "Can gods kill themselves?"

"I'M ABOUT TO TRY!" Mr. D cried out before taking a sigh. "Clearly, something needs to be done about you. But the problem is, I don't…" Suddenly, an idea flashed in Mr. D's mind. She gave a slight smirk before smiling at all the demigods. "Actually, an idea does come to mind. Seems to me that all your problems come from a complete lack of teamwork."

"It does?" Simmons asked.

"What?" Chiron asked.

"You heard me. So what I'm proposing is a nice friendly game of capture the flag."

"Dude, we're terrible at capture the flag." Grif said. "I get caught almost immediately."

"Which is why you're not competing against other campers. You're going to compete against… each other."

"Say… what now?" Sarge asked.

"That's right. You kids will be divided into two teams to compete in your own exclusive game of capture the flag. And since you all seem to be color divided, I'll put you in a team of red and a team of blue."

"Mr. D." Chiron said pulling the god over toward him. "How is this supposed to help them?"

Mr. D turned to make sure no one was hearing him before he whispered back. "It's not. But this way, we can keep them in one place out of our way until we figure out what to do with them."

Chiron rolled his eyes. "You're a model director, Dionysus."

"Hey, uh, Mr. D." Simmons said. "I don't want to question your decision-making skills, but I just did a headcount. You said we're going to be divided into red and blue teams, but in my perspective, there are five reds and only two blues."

"Quiet, Simmons." Sarge said. "We can't let the enemy know we have a tactical advantage over them."

"I don't have to tell them, Sarge." Simmons said. "A kindergarten student could figure it out just by looking at us."

"Not a blue kindergarten student. In fact, they don't even go to school. I bet they're homeschooled. They get their education in Hell, which is exactly where I'll send them back packing with my trusted red team of Heaven. So get ready, my red angels. It's time to go Halo."

"…Que?" Lopez asked.

"Fine. You blue buffoons want another member?" Mr. D asked. He turned to Church and yanked him by the arm. "Congrats, kid. Your blue shirt means you're now on blue team."

"Mr. D!" Chiron protested.

"Why me?" Church asked.

"Because you're the first blue guy I can find." Mr. D said. "So get comfortable."

"That's nice." Tucker said. "But we still need two more guys."

Mr. D sighed. "Picky, picky, picky. Just head to your cabins. I'll have your bases set up tomorrow and the game can begin… when I say so of course."

"Ha!" Sarge cried out. "I knew we were at war! But it's not going to be against other cabins or even the gods themselves! It's against an even greater threat to our way of life… the blues."

"And that guy's our leader?" Grif asked gesturing at Sarge.

Tucker turned to Church. "So what do you think, new guy?"

"How the hell should I know?" Church asked. "This is the weirdest day to wake up with amnesia ever!"

"Mr. D," Chiron said, "I still think this is a bad idea."

"Relax, horse face." Mr. D said. "What's the worst that can happen?"

Can anyone say jinx?

Author's Note: And that's how the Red and Blue teams came to be in Camp Half-Blood.

Now, I'd like to say something. It took some thinking, and I have decided to substitute Percy Jackson with the Reds and Blues and have them go through the canon story in his place. Some brainstorming with a friend of mine lead me to decide that it would be a lot more fun to see how they'd fit in the story. But before we get through all that, I'm thinking of having the Reds and Blues go through some filler hijinks to get them started. After all, what's Red vs Blue without it starting off with just standing around and talking?

Any and all comments are welcome.