Chapter 23 – Under the Veil
Feverish agitation was running through the kitchens of the palace. Lunchtime was approaching. Pots filled with soups and creamy sauces were bubbling quietly over stoves. Poultry was roasting lazily on skewers, scenting the vaulted great hall with delicious and promising aromas that made Iroh's mouth water. Jolly kitchen clerks were peeling fruit, sometimes throwing pieces of mango skin in each other's face. Their supervisor would sometimes turn around and scold them sharply before going to look for another crate full of juicy mangoes, guavas and pineapples from the storeroom.
Toph walked quietly by his side, barefoot, hands behind her back, nostrils wide open inhaling all the smells the kitchens had to offer. Iroh crossed the room to the large central table where the chief cook was sitting. Her nose was buried in a notebook she was filling with little figures which she crossed out regularly and whose meaning no one but herself would understand.
She was a small, scrawny woman, ageless, with a long nose and an emaciated neck, far from the image one would have of a person who spent her days in the kitchens of a royal palace where trays overflowing with delicious dishes all more refined than the others were served at each meal
Hearing his stomach growl, Iroh thought it would have been wiser to come at some other time. Not being hungry would have made his concentration easier and Agni knew how much he needed it.
When they reached the table and faced her, the cook finally deigned to look up at them.
"Yeah? What d'you want?"
"Hello, my dear," Iroh replied warmly.
The little woman blushed violently as she recognized the former Fire Nation Prince, the one who should have been her Fire Lord, and she immediately got up and put away, all confused, the documents she had filled out in her tight handwriting. She immediately summoned a young clerk, a skinny, phlegmatic teenager, and ordered him to bring a tray of her best tea.
"The General is a tea connaisseur. Bring the best we have!" she demanded sharply.
"Oh! It's really not necessary", Iroh smiled, hoping deep in his heart that the cook would not take his politeness too literally.
The palace was renowned for holding a secret stash of the most delicious and rare teas to be found in the Fire Nation. Suppressing a sigh, Iroh thought to himself that he had at least succeeded in teaching his terribly stubborn nephew something good.
"Bring back some cookies with it!" Toph shouted at the teenager who was walking slowly away. "And faster than that!"
The boy jumped and disappeared at full speed without looking back.
Toph sneered, pulled a chair towards her and sat down comfortably, hands behind her head, satisfied, facing the chief cook, still standing looking at them worriedly.
"What can I do for you, Your Excellency?" she asked. "I must say, your presence in the kitchens is a great and…. unexpected honor."
"Please, call me Iroh. That would be much preferred", he replied, smiling. "Sit down, please. It would be terribly rude of me not to invite you to sit down during our conversation."
The woman obeyed and sat down, her back straight. She barked orders at her staff, bustling around the stoves, and waited for Iroh to speak.
"What's your name, my dear?"
"Yume."
"And how long have you been working in the palace kitchens, Yume?"
"Ten years, your… Mr. Iroh… I was already practicing under the reign of Fire Lord Ozai. His son kept me on after his coronation despite the general purge of the staff. I never quite understood why; because his lady liked my pies, I suppose..."
Iroh's smile widened. He immediately felt a fondness for the somewhat naive roughness of this woman whose fiery temperament seemed to hide a quick mind.
"So you must know the staff who work at the palace very well", he asked kindly.
"Oh, that's for sure! I know everyone who comes into my kitchen! I put every new worker to the test, and believe you me, they'd better prove themselves! That's the truth!"
Yume's tone had changed. She looked perked up, almost enthusiastic. Iroh understood that beneath her sour looks, this woman was intellectually curious and he knew he had knocked on the right door. He turned his head to Toph who was staring blankly ahead of her, inches from where Yume's face was. He knew, however, that she wasn't missing a beat of the conversation and she was watching the cook's every heartbeat.
"Good", Iroh continued, "Then maybe you can help me a little."
As he finished his sentence, the clerk returned with a tray laden with china cups, a steaming teapot and two plates full of cakes filled with lemon, cinnamon and cherry jam. The teenager shot a brief, frightened glance at Toph, who immediately straightened up in her chair, looking satisfied and immediately grabbed a handful of biscuits which she gulped down one after the other.
"Perfect!" she exclaimed. "Go on, don't mind me!" she said to Iroh and the cook who watched with wide, astonished eyes; this young noblewoman behaving as rudely as the most boorish of her clerks.
"Very Well, Yume", Iroh resumed, serving each of the women a steaming cup of tea before filling his to the brim and quietly grabbing a cinnamon cookie. "You seem like an organized woman" he added, pointing to the closed notebook in front of the cook.
"Oh, Mister Iroh, you can say that again." she said. - Iroh couldn't help but smile as he noticed how her language was loosening now that she understood who she was dealing with "Not an apple leaves these kitchens without my say-so! - Hey you there!" she yelled suddenly by way of illustration, making Iroh and Toph startle, "I'd better not see you dipping your fingers in that soup again!"
"Well", Iroh said softly. "I think I'm correct in assuming that you keep a register of the servants responsible for bringing meals to the residents and guests of the palace?"
"Of course I do!" she replied in a proud voice that couldn't completely conceal a slightly outraged tone, as if she was offended that Iroh could doubt for a moment the existence of such a notebook.
"I might not be book-smart like those university types, Mister Iroh, but I've always been able to count and write well. And I see everything. What d'you want to know?"
"I need to know if you could give me the register containing the names of the servants who brought the meals to the royal family members during the last three months, please."
"Why on earth would you want to see that?" she asked, frowning.
"That's my business", Iroh replied, a friendly smile still fixed on his face.
Yume frowned again and gave a small huff. Iroh realized that it would take more to coax this blunt, practical woman. He couldn't ask the small staff to treat him like an equal and gain their trust by not being more explicit. And it was a good opportunity to test the loyalty of Zuko's people.
"Listen, Yume. I don't want to spread any rumors or create panic. Can I rely on your discretion?"
The cook lit up with excitement and she wiggled a bit in her seat, her hands clasped in front of her, like someone who is about to be given a gift.
"Of course! What kind of person do you think I am? I've been serving the royal family for more than ten years, I'm not gonna go blabbing their secrets, I'm not an idiot!"
"Perfect. I knew I could count on you. You seem trustworthy to me, Yume, so I'll tell you what I can. Now, you are fully aware that our Princess came back to us seriously injured ten days ago...
"The little one? Oh sorry, yes, Princess Azula. Of course, it's all anyone talks about in the kitchen. How's she doing, the poor thing?"
"Not very well unfortunately", Iroh replied, closing his eyes to more intensely express his sorrow. "My dear niece is still fighting for her survival as I speak to you."
"Oh, poor girl. She's not always an easy one to deal with, but she's not so bad deep down. She's just a poor kid who grew up without a mom. And her father wasn't an easy man either." Then, suddenly worried, she added: "Don't tell her brother I said that!"
"You can speak freely with me, don't worry. I am aware that my niece can be somewhat... harsh in her treatment of the palace staff. Please forgive her for her rudeness. My brother raised her that way. This conversation will remain between you, Miss Beifong here, and me."
The cook turned her head to Toph who nodded and she looked somewhat reassured. She relaxed and listened to Iroh.
"Tell me, Yume. You are aware, I am sure, that the princess has gone through some… hard moments… and that she suffers from a disease of the mind which sometimes obscures her judgment and her reason."
"I think I heard something like that", the cook said nonchalantly, rubbing her chin.
"I have no doubt... Miss Beifong and I have some suspicions about the princess's recent relapse. It is possible that someone could have possibly inadvertently slipped a substance into her food that could have interfered with the effectiveness of her treatment."
"You think one of us poisoned her?" she asked in a low voice, visibly appalled and offended. "Why, I'd never..."
"Oh, don't worry, my dear. We are sure that if it came from the food, it would be just an unfortunate accident. The treatment that Doctor Taïma prescribed to the princess is a very unstable formula. A single ingredient could be enough to disrupt its effects."
"Yeah, so I've heard! That young doctor warned us off putting poppies in the princess's food. You'd better believe we're vigilant about it. You won't find any poppy seeds in my kitchens!"
"I am convinced of it and I am very grateful to you for the precautions you are taking. But other ingredients may explain why the treatment no longer works."
"If you'd like", the diminutive woman went on. "I could give you the order book so you can see what's all come into my kitchen over the last quarter. I keep everything written down in here!" She pointed proudly to the little notebook in front of her for emphasis.
"With great pleasure. If you don't mind, I will take this notebook and the register of the servants who brought the trays to the princess. They might know something. Could you… ?"
"Oh sure! Just a minute!"
And she left her chair hastily. Iroh immediately turned to Toph who was quietly sipping her tea, a quiet smile on her face.
"So? What do you think?"
"That woman is as honest as this teapot!" she said, pointing to a point a few inches from the silver tray where the porcelain teapot was still smoking. "The only time I noticed a vague disturbance in her heartbeat was when she said she had vaguely heard of Princess Crazy's little issues… uh- sorry Azula's problems", she corrected immediately, anxious not to offend another member of the princess's family.
"So you think she's telling me the truth when she claims to be worried about my niece's current condition?"
"Affirmative!" Toph replied. "I don't know if her damn notebooks will help us find what we're looking for, but in any case, I can tell you that if anyone had fun poisoning the princess, it wasn't that old goat!"
They waited in silence for Yume to return with her notebooks.
"Here ya go", she said, handing him the top of the pile. "This one's got the names of all the servants assigned to the princess' service for the last three months. You can look. If you want to question any them, I can call them over!"
"That won't be necessary, Yume, thank you very much. I can take care of it myself. The best thing is for you to remain very discreet about this whole affair to avoid reprisals. If I may allow myself one last question..."
"Of course!" Yume exclaimed excitedly, leaning towards him.
Iroh knew he had piqued her curiosity with these scabrous stories of poisoning and he congratulated himself for taking the risk of trusting her with confidential information. Yume had that natural curiosity and sharp wit of those commoners who love to hear the sordid tales of their kings, he thought. He wondered how far he could push his questions. The servants must know much more than they were willng to admit about the strange relationship that seemed to have blossomed between his nephew and niece over the past year. But now was not the time. At least he had won in Yume a precious interlocutor who would no doubt agree to cooperate on even more delicate matters.
"One last time, are you sure you know all these servants well enough?", he asked, following with his finger the list of names in the notebook's yellowed pages.
"I know them like they're my own kids, Mr. Iroh. I'd never hand over an important task like this to someone I don't trust! The only folks I let up there are the ones who can read and who've had a proper education!"
Iroh suppressed a sigh. He couldn't say he was really surprised. He had often, during his travels, met modest people who idiolized the education and good manners of the rich as supreme values. For people like Yume, being able to read and write was almost a guarantee of moral integrity. It was probably natural, from her perspective. The little education she had received had led her to direct the kitchens of the royal palace, while her illiterate peers had to be content with the post of kitchen clerk and more thankless tasks.
He knew Ozai placed the same value on intelligence, or at least the kind of intelligence that came from education. For his proud brother, it was unthinkable that a person without such education could pose the slightest threat to his power. That was why he surrounded himself with people from modest origins in his small staff. But hadn't that always been Ozai's mistake? Iroh was convinced that this contempt for the common folk was the reason he roasted in prison when Iroh lived a modest and happy life in his tea room. That his gifted and brilliant daughter had lost her mind trying to please him. The reason why she was only a shadow of herself while Zuko, the failure, the good-for-nothing son, was now reining over the Fire Nation.
Iroh suddenly realized that both Yume and Toph had turned their heads towards him, waiting for his response. He had once again let his mind wander.
"Hmm…" he coughed, "Forgive me. So Yume, I was saying : are you absolutely sure that those bringing the platters to the princess couldn't have been fooled… that their attention couldn't have been diverted, just for a moment?"
"Well, I suppose I can't know for sure. But they're instructed to go straight to the room where the princess and the Fire Lord have their meal. And they're forbidden to talk to anyone on the way. It's a rule set down by the Fire Lord himself, from back when he was dealing with assassination attempts early on in his reign."
"Yes, I remember", Iroh agreed, remembering having whispered the idea to Zuko after they discovered the presence of cyanide in a teacup meant for the Fire Lord.
Fortunately, Zuko had put an end to the barbaric practice of having his dishes tasted by an innocent man and no one had been hurt. It was Taïma who had immediately spotted the presence of the deadly poison as Zuko was about to share a cup with her one day when she had come from the asylum to give him a report on Azula's meager progress. That would have helped too; his throat too tight to swallow anything, Zuko had thankfully neglected his own cup.
"Everything coming in and out of the kitchens is strictly controlled, and I'm the one personally responsible for all of it", Yume added proudly, holding up another small notebook in front of her, which she shook under Iroh's nose for more emphasis.
"Very well", Iroh finally said gently, taking the notebook. "Thank you very much for the information you gave me. If you can't help me further, I won't hold you. Miss Beifong, would you mind... ?"
"Yeah!" Toph replied, standing up and filling her pockets with lemon cookies. "Thanks for the tea!" she called out to Yume who was watching her without blinking, her face strained.
Iroh stood up, bowed respectfully to the woman, and was about to turn around when she called him back.
"Wait!"
He looked up at her, an expression of polite curiosity displayed on his wrinkled face as he waited for her to speak:
"Now I think about it", the woman began, frowning in an expression of intense concentration. "There was this guy who seemed a little off..."
"This guy?"
"Yeah, a weird kid, a little quiet but polite. With strange eyes. He came recommended to me by the Fire Lady herself. And without a doubt, he did his job just fine. But I never felt quite comfortable around him. Eh, I don't know if you care about this..."
Something stirred in Iroh's chest. An unpleasant feeling.
"So he didn't pass your test?"
"Gods, no!" she retorted in a tone that said quite well how absurd Iroh's question seemed to her. "But like I said, it was the Fire Lady herself who recommended him."
Iroh exchanged a look with Toph who nodded in his direction. He told himself that she must have felt every change in his heart rate and he wondered if she was thinking the same as him.
Iroh sat back down and put his hand on the handle of the porcelain teapot.
"My dear Yume, would you like another cup of tea?" he suggested.
Zuko looked up, momentarily distracted from his reading, when Azula moaned in her sleep. Putting the register of the guards that Kadao had brought him the very same morning on the bedside, he immediately got up from his armchair and rushed to his sister's side.
Tears were streaming from her eyes and her lips twitched in a sneer of pain. A single sob crossed them, and she sank back into silence and stillness.
She hadn't even opened her eyes. Her beautiful amber eyes that he had been deprived of for so long.
Zuko was not surprised. For the past two days, Azula would moan or squirm in her deep sleep, showing her discomfort or pain.
It had been ten days now. The first three days had been grueling in every way. Azula's condition was terribly unstable and more than once they had thought they were losing her. Fortunately, there had been no need to resort to bloodbending again. Zuko didn't think he could endure this appalling sight a second time. Taïma had always been able to bring her back.
The poor healer was dying of fatigue. Katara had also returned to heal Azula and help mend her broken bones. Zuko didn't let anyone other than his closest friends to his sister. He had repeatedly refused the services of the best doctors in the Caldera. He knew he was placing too much responsibility on Taïma and Katara's shoulders alone, but he wasn't ready to take any risks. Even less since they had proof that his little sister had been poisoned.
Zuko could never show his gratitude to Toph enough. Without her and her unique metalbending, no one would have known and Azula's condition would have kept deteriorating. It had happened, almost by accident, during a simple visit.
Taïma was filling a syringe with the lilac-colored serum Azula used to take every day to treat her illness. Suddenly, the young blind girl has wondered out loud:
"Is it common to use metals to make medicines?"
Taima had frozen, holding the syringe up. What was she talking about? Of course not! Taïma only worked with herbs and plants.
"Still, I assure you that this thing contains metal! And it's not just there!"
Zuko and Taïma had remained dumbfounded, their eyes wide open, watching Toph extract from the vial that contained the treatment, a semi-liquid substance which swirled above her hand and formed a small silver ball which solidified in a few seconds.
Arsenic. Azula's body was flooded with it. It was almost a miracle she had managed to survive so long with such a poison in her body.
It probably lasted for weeks, maybe months. And no one had seen anything. Taïma never ceased to reproach herself for her blindness. Zuko had tried to comfort her. He himself had been fooled. Azula was slowly dying just before their eyes, and they had seen nothing!
Zuko went to wet a rag in the bathroom and placed it delicately on Azula's forehead which he wiped gently. He then used it to wipe away the tears that had run down her cheeks.
The arsenic explained the cramps and blood that Ty Lee and the prison guards had told them about.
The poison, a particularly vicious, slow-acting toxic substance, had nearly destroyed her liver, causing extensive damage to her stomach and - Zuko had blushed fiercely when Taïma mentioned it - her reproductive organs.
Horrified, Taïma had found traces of it in each of the vials that contained Azula's treatment, the very ones she kept so conscientiously in her pharmacopoeia.
They had emptied all the stocks. Every substance, every product the princess had been able to use had been scrupulously analyzed. The poison was found in the wine bottles hidden in her trunk, in the scent oils and creams Azula applied to her skin and, Zuko was terrified hearing it, on one of her lipsticks.
They'd burned everything.
On Taïma's advice, Zuko brought a renowned herbalist to the palace to examine with Taïma a sample of Azula's treatment that the healer had had the good sense to keep. How Zuko had turned pale when he recognized the woman who entered the room, preceded by two guards in scarlet armor! This was the woman Mai saw for their fertility issues.
The pieces of the puzzle came together in his head, and he had to get out of Azula's room so as not to destroy everything in his rage.
Zuko wrung out the water-soaked rag he had just used to dab on his sister's cheeks over a basin and placed a hand on her forehead.
The fever had subsided since Toph had removed from her body the last traces of the deadly metal that nearly killed her. Azula had recovered and seemed to be doing better. If one forgot that she had not opened her eyes, nor said a word, nor made the slightest voluntary movement for ten days.
Finally, there was only one good news in all this drama worthy of a bad tragedy. The herbalist had been formal.
"There isn't nocturnal asphodel in this bottle," she assured a confused Taïma who had showed her, one by one, the herbs used for the creation of Azula's treatment.
Zuko couldn't remember the name of the plant some sinister hand had used as a substitute, to replace the precious ingredient that had brought Azula a normal life for over a year. No need to burden his mind with a scholar's words that he would never remember anyway. All that mattered was that the herb that had been substituted for the nocturnal asphodel looked like it in every way. Its appearance, its smell were identical. The only difference was the absolute ineffectiveness of this plant in the treatment of his little sister's disease.
"So, she's going to be back to normal? The is treatment still working?" Zuko asked, unable to control the strong emotion his voice betrayed.
"Her violent relapse is probably due to the sudden weaning that was imposed on her. The body reacts badly to suddenly stopping such heavy treatment. Correctly prepared and administered, there is no reason why the medicine should no longer work."
Taima's answer had brought hope back to Zuko's devastated heart, almost dispelling the horrible feeling of betrayal that had never left him since he had understood Mai's involvement in this sordid affair.
Taïma had destroyed all her stock and immediately went back to work. She spent hours in her laboratory concocting supplies. Kadao ensured that the room was rigorously guarded at all hours of the night and day.
By now, the herbalist had already discovered her cell in the prison of the Capital. She would stay there until Zuko clarified her real role in this plot. The old woman might claim her ignorance, that she didn't have a single gram of arsenic, she would not see the light of day again until her laboratory was thoroughly searched, and her possessions burned as a precaution. Nor as long as he has not clearly established her innocence.
Zuko had refrained from telling Iroh about it. Taima herself was unaware of what had happened once the old healer had passed the palace gate to return to her laboratory.
Leaning over Azula's bed, Zuko bitterly wondered if they were all wasting their time.
She hadn't regained consciousness once and Zuko was beginning to despair that she would one day come out of this vegetative state. By mutual agreement, Taïma and he had decided to decrease the dose of sedatives to see if that would have an effect. Very quickly, Azula's body showed such obvious signs of pain that they immediately resumed the medication. At the same time, Taïma was administering her treatment to her in the hope that, when she woke up, she would have regained her senses.
She had regained color and her heart kept a constant rhythm. It seemed that her days were no longer immediately in danger. However, despite the device that Taïma had put to her to continue to nourish and hydrate her, Azula was visibly thinning, and her lips were sadly dry.
To see her like this, bedridden, so terribly diminished, unable to feed herself, to wash herself… It was unbearable. Sometimes when he was wading through the mists of a not very restorative sleep, he wondered if Azula wouldn't have prefer that he let her go.
Zuko lectured himself. He had to keep up hope. He had only her. And Uncle Iroh.
It was more than an impression; it was a fact since Mai had left. He thought with a twinge of guilt at the news Kadao had brought him a week earlier in the early hours of the morning.
"Sire, I'm sorry to disturb you at such a time, but it's an emergency."
It was her chambermaids who alerted me. We haven't seen her for two whole days."
… Her parents' house is empty. It seems that the former Governor Ukano and his family left in a hurry. The servants couldn't say anything.
Zuko sat down on the bed next to Azula and began to caress her good arm absently, hoping she could feel it.
He didn't know how he felt about Mai. Her betrayal and responsibility for what had happened to Azula seemed so blatant to him now, that he couldn't really blame himself for the way he had neglected her or feel truly sorry about her abrupt departure.
He knew she hadn't been kidnapped, although these were Kadao's first fears. When he entered their room, he immediately opened the safe in which she kept her collection of blades, knives and darts. Her favorite ones were missing. An enemy wouldn't have let her take her sharpest and deadliest weapons with her.
No word on the bed, no excuse, no explanation.
Nothing.
The Sages were frightened by her disappearance and Zuko had to show all his authority in order to buy their silence. Iroh's intervention had proven helpful too. Mostly, his uncle's presence had the touch of appeasing the people around him. The Sages were no exception. He wondered, seeing Iroh speaking with the elders, if the latter didn't secretly wish to see the former Crown Prince sit on the Throne instead of his stubborn and thoughtless nephew.
They finally came to an agreement. Their enemies shouldn't know that the Fire Lady had left the palace. Any information that could damage Zuko's image had to be kept secret, as much as possible. The servants, maids and courtiers who used to frequent her were asked to silence. Zuko was not very fond of resorting to intimidation. These methods were more like Azula.
He looked at his little sister's face. Her eyes closed, her lips dried, devoid of makeup, her cheeks a little more hollow than usual. "What would you advise me?" he whispered, still caressing her.
Zuko hadn't told the Sages about his assumptions. About the growing sense of anxiety that gnawed at him each time he pictured Mai next to Lu Fang, perhaps plotting behind his back to finish Azula. It was easier to let them believe in a romantic quarrel.
The simplest lies are the best, Iroh had told him in the Council antechamber. The more elaborate a lie is, the harder it is to keep it.
What would Azula, the expert in concealment and dupery, have thought? Wasn't it precisely that, all these artifices, these fooling games, this need to maintain appearances, which had driven his sister to the edge of madness? When the mask had fallen, when the varnish had cracked, Azula lost her ability to control her emotions. Was the same fate awaiting Zuko? How long would he continue to lie to himself?
Don't force me to make a choice, he had warned her that night when he came to see her in her rooms.
As he gazed into the pale face of his sleeping sister, Zuko knew he had been deluding himself the whole time. There had always been, deep inside of him, that dark side willing to please Azula. It was it who had spoken when he'd joined her in Ba Sing Se. It had always been that way. Zuko also knew that this hidden part of his soul coincided with his worst side.
His own desires, his inability to resist his sister's charms, had nearly killed Azula.
Zuko turned his head right and left, as if to make sure they were really alone. Then he leaned over his sister's face and pressed his mouth to hers. He kissed her several times, stroking Azula's passive and silent lips with the tips of his. It was like kissing a dead woman.
What was he hoping for? For her to wake up like the princess of the tales their mother used to read to them? He recalled how Azula would wince in disgust when the kiss scene happened. He himself had to pretend to find it disgusting so that she wouldn't laugh at him.
Zuko straightened up and reached into his pocket. He pulled out the crumpled piece of parchment on which Azula's almost unreadable plea rested. The one she had written years before.
Come back, please.
He placed the piece of paper between his sister's curled fingers, which he folded into a fist. Then he covered his sister's icy hand with his.
"I came back, Azula. I'm here. Now it's your turn to come back to me."
He sat down next to her. The mattress sagged under his weight. Zuko leaned over and kissed her lips a couple more times. He then nestled his face in the crook of Azula's neck, inhaling hard trying to capture some of her scent, exhaling his hot breath in her neck, as if to warm the poor half-cold body.
Zuko then thought back to their embraces on that very same bed, when he had bitten her neck before hoisting her on his knees to bury his face between her breasts and he felt, in spite of himself, a wave of excitement invade him.
Nobody needs to know.
His wandering hand settled around Azula's waist and slipped under her nightgown. A long shiver ran through his whole body when his hot hand touched his sister's icy skin.
"Azula," he breathed out in a shaking whisper as he pressed his lips to the base of her neck.
A metallic din made him jump violently and he tore his face from his sister's neck. The blood rushed immediately to his cheeks, and he stood up very quickly to put a respectable distance between himself and Azula.
Taïma entered the room and froze for a moment, a little surprised to find the Fire Lord standing, his arms dangling, a good distance from Azula's bed, his face very red.
"Are you all right, Zuko?"
"Yes, very well. She… she started crying again in her sleep."
The suspicion that had momentarily invaded the healer's delicately featured face seemed to fade away and a sad look passed through her bright blue eyes.
"I know it's painful to watch, Zuko. But it is undoubtedly a good thing. We can hope that she will gradually regain consciousness. I'll give her her painkillers. You should go get some fresh air. I'll take care of her."
"Okay," he replied obediently, realizing that there was no point in arguing. In addition, he wanted to put as much distance as possible between him and Taïma.
He left the room with a quick but somewhat awkward step.
Where to go next?
He could go find Iroh and his friends. But he remembered, with a pang, that half of them still refused to talk to him unless it was absolutely necessary. When she came to heal Azula, he and Katara barely exchanged a few words. He knew she hadn't forgotten what had happened in the dungeons, nor what Azula had done in the training yard.
Sokka and Suki hadn't come once, and he wondered why they were still there.
Aang and Ty Lee would sometimes come to visit the princess and they just stayed there, in silence. Zuko had noticed that Aang was avoiding looking towards the bed where Azula was lying, as if he had feared burning his eyes.
Ty Lee, in contrast, would stay near her, sometimes running a hand through Azula's hair or taking her hand in hers. She had even insisted on helping Taïma and the maids with grooming Azula and every morning she came to comb her thick hair or paint her nails.
She wouldn't like to feel neglected, she explained to a dumbfounded Zuko who watched her apply a shiny pink polish to his sister's nails.
He still hadn't asked her how she got there the night of the accident. He didn't really want to, not anymore. He couldn't blame Ty Lee. She had saved Azula. He owed an eternal debt to her. Saving her from an uncomfortable interrogation was his way to start paying her back.
He would have liked to join his uncle, but he did not know where to find him. Zuko knew that he was conducting his inquiry with Toph and that their investigations frequently took them to parts of the palace Zuko wasn't used to frequenting, even - Zuko guessed - the streets of the Capital. Zuko could totally imagine Uncle Iroh offering a drink to some talkative guard on leave in a noisy tavern in town. The idea of taking Toph with him had seemed brilliant to Zuko. This living lie detector could be of great help to them. Provided of course that she really cared to help him. After what had happened in the dungeons, after what she had told him, he wasn't quite sure.
Sometimes Zuko wondered what would have happened if he hadn't sent Azula to prison. She would probably be dead already, easy prey left at the mercy of her killers.
Mai…
Zuko still hadn't decided what to do if Mai was found and a part of him, the cowardly one, hoped that she never would be. He knew his wife well. If she wanted him to not find her, it was a waste of time. Her family was also missing. It was her only real weak point and she was smart enough to take them with her, taking advantage of everyone's attention being on Azula.
Listening to Iroh's advice, he made the choice to wait. He wouldn't launch an army of spies and soldiers on his wife's trail, not while the investigation wasn't over.
Zuko's heart contracted painfully in his chest while he thought of how Mai had so ignominiously betrayed him. Though he couldn't really hate her either.
He realized that he no longer had any desire to find his friends. He wanted to be alone. His footsteps had already begun to lead him towards the large living room where he was likely to find them. He spun around and changed direction. At this hour, the little deserted cove where he liked to come with Azula would be magnificent. There he could think of the sweetness of those vanished afternoons, of his sister's rosy cheeks when they woud glance at each other, of the evening glow reflecting on her crown, of her ruby lips stretching in a smile when he returned triumphant from his epic battle against the raging sea and lay down next to her on the white sand.
There he could dive into the rushing waves and swim, swim, fight the deadly rollers, until exhaustion got the better of him.
Arriving at the crown of steep ridges that formed the summit of the volcano, Aang turned and gazed in amazement at the vastness of Caldera City that lay below them. In the golden evening, the buildings seemed to sparkle, and the royal palace blazed. He looked away from the spectacle for a moment to smile at Katara who had just joined him, a little out of breath, one hand resting on a side point. He held out a hand to her which she accepted gratefully and pulled her towards him.
She immediately curled up against Aang's chest who put an arm above her shoulders and said:
"Look how beautiful it is."
"This is magnificent!" Katara replied, a big smile on her lips, her eyes shining with emotion.
It felt so good to see her smile again. Aang congratulated himself on his idea to bring her to contemplate the landscape from the heights of the island. He would sometimes come here alone or with Appa when he felt confused and felt the need to meditate. Seeing how exhausted and unhappy Katara had looked for some time, he had thought it would do her some good to escape the palace toxic atmosphere for a while.
Azula's condition was stationary and Taïma and Zuko constantly took turns at her bedside. Kojiro could wait a bit too. Every day the boy was regaining strength. He had not yet been allowed to remove his bandages, although he expressed a desire to do so.
At least that's what Aang, Katara and Tsuneo had understood. It was difficult to seize the meaning behind the inarticulate rumblings that sometimes escaped from the young man's half-burnt mouth. Aang still wondered how his heart would react to the shock when he saw his new face in a mirror. Tsuneo must have shared his fear because during his last visit, Aang had noticed that the Commander had had all the mirrors removed from his house, before Kojiro was even able to get up and walk.
"It's very...very beautiful!" Katara echoed just before she burst into tears.
Aang immediately hugged her. He hadn't expected her to break down so quickly. He had even been afraid of having to insist a little to get her to talk and reveal to him what had been tormenting her for so many days, although he already had a very good idea.
"Aang!" Katara exclaimed between sobs, "I'm an awful person!"
"No! What are you talking about? You are the nicest, most understanding and compassionate girl I have ever seen! You could have been the Avatar!"
Katara laughed a little in the middle of her tears and let out an incredulous cry of surprise.
Aang wasn't laughing at all. Deep down in his soul, he knew. He had always known. From the moment Katara had achieved her full potential thanks to Master Pakku's teaching, he had known his fiancée was meant to be the new Avatar. If he himself had not broken the cycle by hibernating for a hundred years in that iceberg, a new avatar would have succeeded him. First air, then water. If Aang had lived the life intended for him, he very well could have died twenty years ago. And the new Avatar would have sought a new body to inhabit. And what better hostess than the last waterbender of the Southern Water Tribe to shelter this ancestral soul? It was Aang's intimate conviction, even if he had never shared it with anyone.
At least his confidence had the merit of calming Katara who was now wiping her eyes and trying to regain her composure.
"Aang, I have to confess something to you. About Azula. That night when I used bloodbending to revive her..."
"I know," Aang cut her off. "Iroh told me."
Katara looked up at him, her beautiful blue eyes widened in surprise. The astonishment was quickly dissipated by a wave of guilt and remorse and her shoulders slumped.
"What exactly did he tell you?"
So Aang told her everything he knew. How, after a while, Azula's already strained body had completely slipped out of her control, how she had closed her hands tightly around her own neck. How her fingers had left purplish marks on it, how she had almost strangled herself.
"Did you know?" Katara asked in despair, her face pale. "You knew and you didn't say anything… How do you manage to continue sleeping near me? To look me in the eye? When I can no longer look at myself in a mirror!"
Aang hugged her tighter and let her sob against his chest.
"I can't even imagine what Iroh must have thought of me! And if Zuko found out, he will..."
"You don't have to worry. Iroh warned me because he was afraid you might react like that. Zuko doesn't know. He thought it was a reflex."
"I almost killed his niece! In pure selfishness! How can he forgive me?
"You didn't do it selfishly. You thought of the Nation, you thought of peace, you thought of our friends, of all our efforts to maintain it."
Katara wiped her eyes. She didn't dare look at him and Aang felt his stomach capsize.
Neither of them mentioned the other possibility. The other reason that could have pushed Katara to take advantage of the opportunity that fate gave her to rid the world of the threat Azula represented. To imagine a vindictive Katara was an oddity and yet… An old memory seemed to float for a moment in the breeze that made Katara's brown hair flutter.
Aang painfully remembered Katara's angry face as she flew off with Zuko on Appa's back, in search of the man who had killed her mother.
As if reading his mind, Katara took a deep breath and said:
"You didn't kill Ozai when he was about to burn an entire kingdom to ashes. You knew how to remain yourself; you knew how to resist the desire to avenge your people!"
"It was not Ozai who killed all my people. If it had been Sozin, I honestly wonder what I would have done."
"I'm sure you would have acted exactly the same. You are... you are so..."
She didn't finish her sentence and buried her face in his neck again. He put his arms around her and held her close to him.
Maybe now was the time to tell Katara about how he'd felt that day, when he held Ozai at his mercy. When, invested with the incredible power the Lion-Turtle had offered him, he had almost yielded to the all-powerfulness that inhabited his body. When he had felt the darkness gnawing at him, grabbing his soul. When the only thing that had saved him from becoming a murderer was the thought of the girl he loved, who had fought with him for a year to bring peace to the world.
He had never confessed to anyone the real reason why he had always refused to take away Azula's bending, even when the Sages had begged him to do so a few weeks earlier. How to admit, when you were the Avatar, an Air monk whose wisdom everyone sang, that you were afraid to give in to temptation? The temptation to taste this all-powerful sensation one more time, the one you feel holding in your hands, the power to take as well as to give. The power to withdraw from the other the gift that the spirits themselves have granted him? And that, much more exhilarating, to take away a life, as one pulls out weeds.
He had not refused in order to protect Azula. Nor for obscure philosophical reasons. The truth was he was afraid. He feared he could not resist a second time. He feared the pleasure that arose from omnipotence, from the feeling to dispose of someone's life. Ozai was perhaps the worst of men, but he had never directly attacked those whom Aang loved – Zuko apart.
Whereas Azula… She had pierced him with her lightning bolts, left him for dead, he, a twelve year boy, and that, without feeling the slightest remorse. She had tried to kill Katara. More recently, Ty Lee, Suki and her baby could have succumbed to her blows. She was evil, a liar, manipulative and power hungry. She had perverted her brother's mind and heart, the best friend Aang had ever known, and was turning him away from him, each day a little more.
So, he really didn't see how he could have blamed Katara for thinking that it was possible. Especially at a time when all of her power had been revealed. Katara was able to control the blood, even though it was not a full moon! No one before had been able to accomplish such a feat from what Iroh had told him.
Aang had never dared to tell anyone about the guilty thoughts that agitated him and prevented him from sleeping some nights. Not even to the woman he now held in his arms and who was his whole universe. It was the memory of her that had saved him from his own impulses that day when he held the life of the Phoenix King in his hands. So he owed her this favor.
"Listen Katara, I have to confess something to you."
Katara pulled away from him and looked up at him with her large blue eyes clouded with tears. Her lower lip was still quivering, and he kissed it tenderly. After a last hesitation, he began his story.
And as he spoke, something extraordinary happened.
The grief and shame that lodged in his fiancée's eyes gradually faded. It seemed to him that they entered into him and became his.
He greeted them almost with relief. These feelings weren't so painful to bear. Much less than doubt and guilt. Much less than the certainty of lying to himself. Aang thought back to the teaching of Guru Pathik, to the chakras, to the spiritual energy that circulated in every one's body. And he smiles. It was okay to be ashamed. His determination to do right would set him free. As for grief, Katara's unconditional love would help him come to terms with it, just as his love for her would give her the comfort she so badly needed.
The leaden feeling that had plagued his stomach for almost five years grew lighter and the iron hand that clutched his heart seemed to loosen its grip a little. His throat also cleared, and he was able to speak:
"It's good to finally tell the truth."
Katara nodded against his shoulder.
Like that day at the Southern Air Temple, as he thought of all his tragically lost friends, tears welled up in his eyes. They cried together, Katara and him. These weren't just tears of grief. There was also relief, joy, and lots of love. After a moment, they looked at each other and, without explanation, their tears turned to laughter and they both burst into almost uncontrollable chuckling.
He knelt down next to Katara who had to sit down and was still holding her stomach. When she saw him near her, she clung to his neck and placed a fiery kiss on his mouth which he returned with more passion. He felt something throb in his spine and lower abdomen.
Sensing his desire, Katara leaned further against him.
The view was wonderful, the evening was balmy, and they were alone.
With a smile, Katara led him to a corner where the ground was more regular and sheltered from a rock, she unbuckled her belt.
Guilt blocks the seat of pleasure.
Here, on the sharp ridges of the volcano, out of sight, as pleasure enveloped them both, Aang felt the guilt leave him, float for a moment above their entwined bodies, and vanish into the sky.
Lu Fang moved through the wide tunnel, dimly lit by torches lined up along the rocky walls. Indifferent to the tumult caused by the earthbenders in charge of laying out the underground galleries, he progressed with a sure and conquering step.
Behind him, hands crossed over the small of his back, a lanky young man was walking, his face half hidden by a green pointy hat with flared edges and wearing a long, high-necked tunic of the very same shade. He walked with a quiet step that made almost no sound, as if gliding over the earthy ground. If the workers they met on their way did not fail to notice Lu Fang in his shining armor and interrupt their labor to bow respectfully to him, no one seemed to mind the strange being following in his footsteps.
"I'm asking you one last time, Wu. Do you honestly think your plan has any chance of success?"
"I'll bet my hand, Commander. I've had the opportunity to observe them for a long time and I am sure they will cooperate."
Lu Fang turned to his agent; a look of obvious displeasure displayed on his rough, square-jawed face.
"You have already disappointed me once, Wu. You had to bring Princess Azula back to me alive. Your incompetence has put us all in danger and risks exposing us momentarily to our enemies."
The Dai Li agent bowed humbly and sat up quickly before replying in a quiet voice:
"I am aware of my errors, and I once again implore your forgiveness, my Lord. I should have been more careful. I was not prepared to deal with the great mental instability of the princess. I should have known. However, at the risk of repeating myself, I can assure you that it is impossible that she could have survived such a fall."
Lu Fang muttered something but didn't answer. He resumed his walk, followed by Wu, who was still advancing behind him with his exasperating and calm assurance.
Lu Fang didn't like him. He didn't like any of his Dai Li agents. If they hadn't turned out to be such brilliant spies and capable earthbenders, he would gladly have had them all executed. He would never trust them. And Wu with his gaze full of mischief, his odd eyes that seemed to cry out his duplicity in the eyes of the world, was perhaps the most dangerous of all.
It didn't bode well for him that no news from the Fire Nation had reached them since the disastrous kidnapping attempt of Princess Azula. Thanks to Wu who had managed to infiltrate the palace in the hours that followed, Lu Fang knew that the princess's broken body had been found and that the latter had been brought back to the palace.
Wu then had sped to the headquarters where he had found Lu Fang supervising the construction. As they pursued their progress through the dimmer passageways that descended to the depths, Lu Fang marveled at the progress they have made over the past week. The network of undergrounds and tunnels continued to expand tremendously. The night, before falling asleep, Lu Fang would sometimes find himself laughing, thinking of those fools of the Fire Nation soldiers who didn't even realize what was going on right under their feet.
His invasion plan was working wonderfully. Zuko's armies were wasting their time in Yu Dao where they had begun to besiege Lu Fang's camp, guarding all entrances. In their ranks were even some earthbenders, traitors to their blood, in charge of locating possible clandestine undergrounds which would have allowed Lu Fang's soldiers to escape.
But the latter remained wisely in the camp, bravely supporting the siege under the direction of Yao, who was ordered to wait.
Wait and see.
This was Lu Fang's creed. And he had been right, as always. Thus, Lu Fang did not hesitate for a second when the opportunity presented itself in the form of a ship from Zuko's imperial fleet, moored a few miles from the port of Yu Dao, no doubt to supply. He had acted.
A few suborns and some cut throats had been enough to pass the wall of soldiers sent here by Zuko and after only a few hours of marching, Lu Fang and a squad of his best earthbenders were on the boat anchoring in the bay. Its crew was clearly not prepared for a surprise attack. These fools had such a blind faith in their colleagues, and they probably thought that the army surrounding Lu Fang's camp would be enough to protect them from any possible offensive. What naivety! That idiot Zuko must have been too busy screwing his whore of a sister behind the closed doors of his palace to pay attention to what was going on right under his nose!
Lu Fang smiled as he remembered how easily he and his men, dressed in the uniforms and armor of the Fire Nation navy, had passed all the checks and border crossings. It had been a brilliant idea to spare the life of the captain. The latter had been strangely cooperative when asked to act like nothing had happened and pretend that all these men were his. Death threats had been helpful of course. So had been, without a doubt, the thought of his pretty eighteen-year-old daughter, freshly enlisted in the Navy alongside her father, tied up in the hold and let to the appetites of Lu Fang's men. What a face the father had made when he discovered what remained of his daughter's honor, just before he was thrown into the water once the land was in sight! Lu Fang was still laughing at the memory.
Now, both father and daughter, too used to be of any value, lay at the bottom of the sea, a few miles off the main Fire Nation Island.
As soon as they docked, Lu Fang and his men set to work. The underground passage, whose entrance was only detectable for a practiced earthbender, was now several tens of miles long. They were getting closer every day to the Capital. Of course, their progress would have been much faster on land. Though if it had been easy to overcome the crew of a ship and outwit the vigilance of a troop of ill-prepared soldiers in enemy territory, there was no doubt that in their own country, the members of Zuko's Imperial Army would be much more devious. Better to act underground.
Lu Fang and Wu came to a crossroads, tugging the Commander out of his pleasant thoughts. He was wondering if he might not manage to have a room prepared just below that of the Fire Lord when they finally reached the heart of the volcano where the royal palace was enthroned. The idea of using the bunkers fitted out by Ozai and abandoned since the Day of the Black Sun invasion, had crossed Lu Fang's mind for a moment.
These had been a great help when it came to communicating with Wu over the past few weeks. But this plan seemed risky to him.
The murder attempt on Princess Azula - at this time, Lu Fang doubted that there was still anyone who believed it was an accident - must have heightened the vigilance of the Imperial Guard and he was certain that Zuko must have posted soldiers all over the Caldera.
Wu stopped next to Lu Fang, presumably waiting for him to resume on his way to follow him.
Lu Fang couldn't help but feel deeply irritated with his agent. If the latter hadn't failed his mission so miserably, they would still have a man at the palace to inform them of the Fire Lord's decisions.
When he had heard the news of the princess's imprisonment, Lu Fang had locked himself in his underground chamber all day. Azula neutralized, he lost his scapegoat, and his people lost their main source of a claim to further their goals. Lu Fang couldn't bear the bellows falling now that the revolt was on its rails. Wu's presence at the palace was his only hope. He would bring the princess back to him and Lu Fang could again use it both to stir up the anger of his people, and to blackmail Zuko. If Azula couldn't fulfilling these goals, he had another plan for her. As intense as his hatred for the conquering princess was, he recognized the beauty when he saw it. If his own repugnance made him impervious to the princess' charms, he didn't ignore them. When his men were done with her, sending her ransacked and dishonored body to Zuko would be perfectly jubilant!
The princess must have succumbed to her injuries by now but according to reports from his spies returning from the Caldera, there had been no ceremony or funeral at the palace. At least, publicly.
Whether she was dead or alive, Zuko would have been well-inspired to announce her death, right? Either to appease the anger of his people, or to protect his sister from further attempted murder? Lu Fang suppressed a sigh of frustration. It was hardly if his spies had been able to glean any information about the unexplained departure of the Fire Lady. News from the palace trickled in.
Lu Fang would have sent Wu, who remained despite his blunder, the best of his agents. But it was too risky. His absence must have been noticed by palace staff by now and his disappearance must have seemed most suspicious in these troubled times for the royal family. He could be recognized at any time and defeat the plan if captured. Unless…
We'll see later, Lu Fang thought. There was always plan A, the one suggested by Wu. If this one failed again, then we would think of a new strategy which would have the double merit of offering him Zuko's sister and ridding him of this inconvenient accomplice.
"Commander," Wu called him patiently, while Lu Fang seemed to hesitate on which way to go. "May I help you…"
"I know exactly where to go, Wu. Thank you. I was thinking. You seem to think our most recalcitrant prisoner might cooperate. I was wondering what was the best way to approach her."
Wu gave him a sly smile that seemed to make his green eye sparkle, though it was half-hidden by his hat.
Lu Fang listened attentively to his agent who detailed to him, through the maze of increasingly dark tunnels, everything he had discovered about their prisoner over the past few months.
They walked for a while longer and finally reached the dungeons, located deep in their underground network. Here the atmosphere must have been almost unbreathable for anyone who was not an earthbender. Long pipes which crossed the thick crust of the earth had been installed to allow the prisoners to breathe some air.
Lu Fang took Wu to the last cell, located at the end of the artificial corridor dug by his men. Behind the bars of a cage, a slender figure turned her back to them, sitting on the damp floor of her cell. Her long black hair fell behind her back, forming a curtain that concealed her narrow shoulders.
"To what do I owe the honor of your visit, Commander?" muttered a dull and hoarse voice, devoid of any passion.
"I came to see if you were well installed, Madam. I could not suffer that a distinguished host like yourself is not satisfied with the services I offer. Is your room to your liking?'
"You can lock me up as long as you want, Lu Fang, deprive me of light and food, I will not tell you anything until you tell me what you did with my family, you son of a b..."
"Let's calm down, my dear. It will not be said that I, Lu Fang, Minister of War and closest adviser of His Majesty, the 52th king of the Earth Kingdom, missed my courtesy duties. I have brought here someone that you and I have in common. I thought I could give you both a very special assignment. If you accept, I'm sure we can come to an agreement concerning your little family."
The woman turned; an angry look imprinted on her thin face. Beneath the thick black bangs that cut across her forehead, silver half-moon eyes twinkled in the torchlight. Her jaw contracted a little, but she didn't betray any emotion when she recognized Wu who was standing a little behind, a few inches away, half hidden by Lu Fang's imposing build. The latter stood back a little and let Wu walk towards the cage, his eternal smile on his lips.
"It's good to see you again, Fire Lady."
Azula woke up in the gray hours preceding dawn, one August morning, the day after her twentieth birthday, two weeks precisely after the fall which had almost been fatal to her.
Zuko wasn't here when she opened her eyes. After a bad night punctuated by horrific nightmares, he had woken up in the sweat-soaked sheets of his bed.
His mind still numb with sleep, he groped the mattress beside him out of habit. His hand only met the cold sheets on his left and he remembered.
Mai is gone. She's not there anymore.
When he would stay by Azula's bedside, the thought of Mai only filled him with a dull anger. He had only to contemplate his little sister's beautiful face, emptied of color for the betrayal of his wife to leap at his throat, taking his breath away as surely as a punch struck in the stomach.
But at night it was another story. When he went back to his room every other evening, entrusting Ty Lee or Taïma with watching over the princess, sorrow suddenly arose and squeezed his chest.
The same feeling greeted him when he woke up that morning.
His body stiff with fatigue and despair, which had never let go since the accident, he extricated himself from his sheets with the intention of dodging breakfast. The perspective of being face to face with his uncle and his friends and having to keep the conversation going exhausted him already. So he decided instead to go directly to the training yard. He had largely neglected his firebending exercises since Azula's incarceration.
The memory of what had happened in the dark dungeons of the palace kept haunting him. Zuko had long since given up ambition to bend lightning and resolved to remain the only member of the royal family deprived of this extraordinary ability. He had come to terms with it, just as he had finally accepted that his flames would never wear the magnificent azure hue that Azula made hers. He couldn't help, however, as soon as he found himself alone in the practice yard, to try again. Realizing that he would hardly succeed without sufficient motivation, he had used mannequins on which he had imagined the heinous face of that ignoble Lu Fang.
His uncle had always told him that lightningbending required maximum concentration and total control over your emotions. This no doubt explained why he was unable to do so at this time when he was mourning the failure of his marriage and living in constant fear of losing his little sister. Yet, wasn't it anger that had momentarily invested him with this power, as he burned with rage against those who wished Azula harm? Sometimes Zuko considered the possibility that Uncle Iroh had lied to him.
He had come to this conclusion when Ty Lee appeared in the courtyard, panting. From the crimson shade of her cheeks, she must have been running for a long distance.
She came to him, her body bent under the effort she just made. Although she was an extraordinary acrobat and of an amazing speed in her gestures, Ty Lee was not a runner. Mai was a sprinter, efficient over short distances. But it was Azula who stood out above all at running. She was both fast and resistant. Even Zuko, who yet was a good runner, had never been able to catch up to his sister when she decided to escape him. Aang himself had admitted having been unable to on the day of Black Sun when Azula had tried to lose them in the maze under the mountain.
Azula would probably never run again. She would never do anything again. It was the painful thought that crossed his mind as, in front of him, her hand on her side point, Ty Lee caught her breath.
"Zuko…" she gasped.
An instinctive terror seized Zuko, and he braced himself for the worst. What could have prompted Ty Lee to leave Azula's room in the early morning and run after him through the whole palace?
"Azula?" Zuko asked, unable to pronounce more than her name.
Ty Lee took a deep breath and finally spoke: "She's awake, Zuko! She's there! And conscious."
It was like being hit in the head by a projectile thrown at full speed. Zuko felt the blood rush to the back of his skull and cause painful pressure there. His heart skipped several beats.
He would have fallen to his knees if Ty Lee hadn't caught him just in time, her knees bending under his weight.
"It will be fine, Zuko. She's awake!" she exclaimed, tears in her throat.
"I want to see her!" He breathed into the back of Ty Lee's neck who was supporting him on her shoulder.
Ten minutes later, they arrived perspiring in front of the huge double door. With a twinge in his heart, Zuko thought of everything that had happened in that room: Azula kneeling in front of him, his hands greedily searching under her robe a few weeks later, the ardent caresses she gave him on the bed... Three times he had let things get out of hand with his sister. He didn't enter right away. His shoulders sagged under the weight of guilt.
"Zuko, aren't you okay?" Ty Lee asked, full of concern. "Azula is here, she's waiting for you."
"I hurt her so much, Ty… What if… what if she doesn't forgive me?"
"She forgave you once before, she replied gently. "I am sure she will do it again. She loves you; you know."
She reached out a hand to him and Zuko gratefully grabbed it. With the other, Ty Lee pressed the handle and opened the door.
They entered together.
Azula was resting on her bed. Since the moment Ty Lee had left the room a few minutes earlier to warn Zuko, Taïma had placed pillows behind her back so that she could sit up.
The princess seemed completely lost. Although she had answered correctly all the questions Taïma had asked her when she woke up, she seemed in a state of great confusion and kept glancing all around her, as if she was looking for support, for proof that the world around was real. Her large amber eyes looked terrified, and her lips were quivering a bit.
Taïma sat next to her, a hand gently resting on her good arm, a benevolent smile illuminating her face.
"Look who's here, Princess," she whispered softly in her ear when she saw Zuko, and Ty Lee enter.
The Fire Lord stood for a moment under the arch that marked the entrance to the chamber, which was served by a corridor lit by flaming torches lined up along the walls. He seemed petrified, momentarily unable to move or speak. The same confusion shone in his golden eyes he firmly fixed on Azula.
Taïma had often imagined this reunion and had always figured out great effusions, laughter mixed with tears.
That's not what happened.
Deathly silence enveloped the room and the tension in the air was such that Taïma found it difficult to breathe.
Both brother and sister stared at their sibling as if challenging each other, unable to speak.
Hot tears rolled down Zuko's cheeks, red from the race through the maze of the palace. His chest was heaving and sinking at a frantic pace. Taïma felt that from one minute to the next, he was going to throw himself on his sister.
As for Azula, her livid face expressed total dismay. Taïma thought she saw all the feelings pass through her slightly glazed eyes: immense anger, relief, happiness and a crushing grief too. Taima was certain that her hazy mind was recomposing the memories of the last few weeks and trying to sort out what was real and what wasn't. The healer feared the consequences of such a whirlwind of conflicting emotions for her broken mind.
The next few hours would be decisive. They would find out if the princess had regained all her mental capacities thanks to the treatment Taïma had continued to administer to her through the vein. A simple test had already revealed to her that her intellectual faculties were intact: Azula had managed to read a few sentences in her raspy voice and had managed to carry out the operations Taïma had asked her. She remembered who she was and where she was. It was already amazing. On the other hand, Azula had no memory of her accident or of the hours that had preceded it. Taïma supposed that her memory would come back little by little.
Finally, after a time that seemed everlasting to Taïma, Zuko took a step forward.
"There you are…" he whispered so weakly that Taïma thought she had imagined it.
Taïma felt Azula stiffen, and a grimace of sharp pain distorted her regular features. The princess had regained consciousness shortly after Taïma had administered her painkillers and she congratulated herself for having done so. The awakening could have been much harsher.
"Go away!" Azula suddenly groaned at the cost of what seemed like prodigious effort. "Go away from me!" she repeated louder, tears drowning her bronze eyes.
Taima decided to intervene.
"Azula, don't be afraid. Zuko doesn't mean any harm to you! He is just happy to see you again. Everybody here is happy. No one is going to hurt you, trust me."
Azula wanted to pull away from her. In her panic, she ignored her brittle bones and let out a heart-rending scream as the movement strained her fractured pelvis.
Zuko was on her in an instant, swooping down on his sister like a raptor on a terrified little prey.
The pain in Azula's skull, ribs and pelvis must be unbearable. But she couldn't help but gesticulate in all directions. Distraught at the idea that she could injure herself, Taïma tried to immobilize her.
"No! No! I don't want to!" Azula shouted now in a shrill voice. "I don't want to! Let go of me! Let go of me!"
"Azula! Stop! Look at me!" Zuko ordered in a loud voice that made emotion tremble but easily dominated all the others.
The princess obeyed instantly, froze, and opened her eyelids.
So Zuko leaned over her, cautiously closed his arms around her distressed body and held her tightly against him, like a drowned man clings to his buoy, and he began to cry against her shoulder.
"You are there!" He moaned between sobs; his head buried in her neck. The kisses with which he punctuated his words echoed in the silent room. And Azula capitulated.
She put her good arm around his shoulder and clutched it just as desperately. She dug her sharp fingernails into the back of her brother's neck who gave a muffled growl but stayed there. He ran kisses down Azula's neck and worked his way up to her cheek, kissing her eyelids and forehead.
As moved as she was embarrassed, Taïma sought the gaze of Ty Lee who silently wiped her eyes in a corner of the room. She stood up slowly, trying not to move the bed for fear of hurting Azula. Then she joined the young acrobat and put a hand on her shoulder.
"Come Ty Lee, let's leave them alone."
Without a word Ty Lee nodded and with one last look back, they left the room.
There would be a time for words, Taïma thought to herself. A time for anger and resentment. A time to hate each other then to forgiveness.
But for the moment, nothing seemed to matter for the siblings tightly entwined on the bed who eagerly sought each other's gaze, as if trying to drown in it.
That's it for today. I hope you liked this chapter.
A little quiz to see if you followed! ^^
I would like to know your presumptions!
1. In your opinion, what state of mind will Zuko and Azula be in after this reunion? Do you see them making up quickly?
2. How will the Gaang and Iroh react?
3. Will Zuko still want to declare war on the Earth Kingdom now that he suspects Mai of hurting Azula?
4. What is Lu Fang going to do to Mai?
5. Can we count on Momo to fix the whole situation?
See you soon for chapter 24!