Chapter 24 – A New Beginning
Iroh watched the zeppelin take off a few dozen feet from where he stood facing the runway. The propellers were turning at full speed. The enormous machine raised in its track great gusts of wind which made his long hair and gray beard float behind him.
He remembered with a touch of nostalgia his first flight aboard a flying machine. He was just a young man then, and aerial engineering was still in its infancy. As a child, he was fascinated by his Nation's industry and dreamed of becoming an aeronautical pioneer. At the time, aircraft were small, barely maneuverable machines that could not accommodate more than two men at a time.
However, Iroh did not like these new models. Their performance was undeniable, but they had been designed for one purpose only: destruction. These ships, huge war machines armed with cannons, represented a period of Fire Nation history that Iroh would have preferred to forget.
Zuko shared his reluctance, but he wanted to keep all of his machines. It had not seemed wise to him, in a newly pacified world, to give up all at once what made his Nation superior. It was one of the few times Zuko had refused to listen to Aang. The former General in Iroh approved of his nephew's decision. The pacifist he had become had felt a certain discomfort at the idea.
Zuko had gone so far as to expand his fleet over the past year, investing a good portion of the armies' budget in building and maintaining airships. If Iroh was asked who had given him this idea… Iroh had his little assumption.
It was widely believed that the Fire Lord was not insensitive to Azula's advice, even though she was officially barred from political life. But until now, Iroh hadn't realized just how much. And according to the many witnesses he'd met, from Aang to the guards, to Azula's maids and servants, he wasn't only sensitive to her opinions.
Aang had refused to tell him everything he knew but Iroh had understood enough. And the fierce stubbornness with which Zuko continued to shield Azula from the charges against her kept tormenting Iroh.
Certainly, the responsibility of his niece in what had happened to Kojiro was debatable, but by what right did that exempt her from a proper trial? Iroh had come to this obvious conclusion: deprived of treatment or not, Azula would probably have reacted exactly the same way.
React to what exactly? That was the reason for Iroh's presence. He hadn't come just to admire the take-off of part of the air fleet heading for the colonies where the situation was now out of control.
Precisely, the man he had come to see was advancing towards him, imposing in his sparkling vermilion armor despite his advanced age.
It might have been ten years since Iroh had seen Commander Tsuneo. At that time, the man was the captain of the palace guards. It was Ozai who had transferred him to the air fleet due to his skills in aeronautics at the end of his first year of reign. He was then only a Lieutenant. It was Tsuneo's refusal to participate in the great slaughter organized by Ozai on the day of the Comet that had prompted Zuko to promote him to the rank of Commander, under Kadao's advice. The two men had been rewarded by Zuko for their bravery after they together hijacked the airship they were commanding. They had been able to destroy the outer casing of two other aircraft, forcing their occupants into a forced landing as they flew over a densely populated area of the Earth Kingdom. The inhabitants of the region had thus escaped the massacre.
Iroh therefore felt a deep respect for the man who was now walking towards him. Tsuneo was still a pleasant man in his sixties, well built, with a bald head and a crown of white hair cut close to his ears. Kojiro was his youngest son and, from information Iroh managed to glean, a promising firebender and a handsome young man. At least before cruel fate put Azula in his path.
Iroh gave himself courage by taking a deep breath and composed his usual benevolent smile to welcome him:
"Commander Tsuneo, good to see you again."
"General Iroh, it's an honor," the man replied, bowing briefly to him.
The coldness and reproach in his voice was noticeable even to someone whose niece wouldn't have ruined his son's life.
For once, Iroh thought it better not to recall that he had stripped himself of his title almost thirteen years ago.
Tsuneo was probably aware of this, and he also had to know what tragedy had caused Iroh to retire. As a father who nearly lost his boy, Tsuneo might be more willing to listen to him.
Maybe not after all, Iroh considered when Tsuneo spoke up:
"I know why you are here, General. And I can tell you that you are wasting your time."
"Come on Commander, let's be reasonable. Your fleet has just taken off. Don't you have time for a drink?"
"I don't think so. Get to the point, Iroh."
The old man did not fail to notice the absence of the title this time.
"Fine, as you wish. First of all, I wanted to know how your son is."
"Like a young man of twenty-three who had three-quarters of his face burned by a maniac."
Despite himself, Iroh answered: "Attention Commander, don't forget that you are talking about your princess..."
"Maniac is already too kind a word for this whore."
This time, Iroh cringed, and he felt something stir in his insides, a feeling not unlike what he had felt when those bully guards at Ba Sing Se had insulted Kurei.
Had he grown, like Zuko, to feel a form of affection for his niece?
"You forget yourself, Tsuneo," he chided. "If the Fire Lord learns that a Commander of his armies speaks thus of a member of the royal family... You will be aware of the edict he recently issued, the one which states..."
"…that anyone caught rumouring, insulting or defaming any member of the royal family is liable to a heavy fine and jail time?" Tsuneo finished.
Iroh didn't answer and held his interlocutor's gaze, hoping his face didn't betray the shame and embarrassment he felt. This edict issued two days after Azula's awakening had caused Iroh deep unease.
"The first step towards dictatorship!" Sokka exclaimed sarcastically, when Iroh came to tell them about the news after the Defense Council which had been held in the Throne Room, presided over by an arrogant, proud and inaccessible Zuko, installed behind its curtain of ardent flames.
"That being said," Tsuneo resumed as Iroh thought back to the inflexible expression on his nephew's face during that surprise announcement, "It's quite a reasonable decision. The kind of law I would make up myself if I was the king and fucked my own sister behind closed palace doors."
This time, Iroh shuddered visibly and closed his eyes for a moment to keep from giving in to anger.
"I understand your fury Tsuneo. But you should know that Princess Azula wasn't herself when she attacked Kojiro."
"That's what they say."
"Aang told you about it, didn't he? He explained to you there was a conspiracy and that people intrigued to aggravate the mental illness from which my niece suffers. Azula probably wouldn't have acted like this if she had been in full control of her emotional faculties."
"I didn't know that crazy criminals were automatically granted amnesty in Fire Nation."
"They are not," Iroh replied, frowning.
"Then can you explain to me why the woman who disfigured my son is currently in the palace, sleeping in silk sheets and feasting on delicacies? Do you know that my son is spoon fed and can only ingest liquids and purees like a nursling?"
"I do not deny the terrible suffering your boy must endure. But you seem well informed, and I have no doubt that you have learned that the princess was recently the victim of an attack and that she was seriously injured."
"I heard about it," Tsuneo grumbled, clearly unmoved by the news.
"You probably also know that we are still looking for the perpetrators of these attacks and that my nephew, the Fire Lord, charged me with leading the investigation."
Tsuneo didn't answer but Iroh saw in his look that he had piqued his curiosity. Taking advantage of this, he continued:
"And I'm sure that, knowing all that, you wouldn't like Zuko to find out that one of his Commanders, who just happens to be the father of a boy the princess unintentionally hurt, is harboring a notorious hatred against her? I doubt that such rumors are to your advantage…"
Tsuneo's face, which anger had already made red, suddenly turned purple:
"Are you threatening me?"
"No, I'm just giving you a friendly piece of advice. If I were you, I wouldn't be too keen on publicly expressing my dislike for the princess. The Fire Lord is particularly touchy about his sister right now."
"I had nothing to do with what happened to that who… to the princess."
"Of course, of course, I'm sure of it… Only, I'm afraid the Fire Lord doesn't have the same open-mindedness as me. This is a point on which he and I often disagree. I shouldn't speak ill of the Fire Lord, but my nephew is an irascible, stubborn man! A real pigheaded boy. We can't blame him though; he almost lost his beloved sister."
Tsuneo listened to Iroh speak. Purplish blotches continued to flush his cheeks and Iroh could see his pulse fluttering near his Adam's apple.
"Why are you here? If not to threaten me..."
"Threatening you? No, my friend, I'm not that kind of man! These are practices worthy of my father and my brother and I would never lower myself to such a point... I just think," he added with a sigh, giving his features an expression of deep sadness, "that Kojiro has suffered enough as it is. Above all, I wouldn't want him to have to suffer the loss of his father as well."
"Why would he lose me?" Tsuneo said defiantly. "I did nothing wrong."
"No, of course not. I just wonder what would happen if Zuko learned of the existence of the little group that you and some friends, all high-ranking in the army, have founded and which meet at night in the basement of this tavern, to the east of the city, in the working-class district."
"How?" he nearly choked. "Who told you about..."
His face suddenly turned livid and only two purple spots, last vestiges of his indignation, still colored his cheeks.
"I happen to have my sources," Iroh smiled. He looked skyward, pretending to be interested again in the airships that were now hovering far above them and disappearing one by one into the fluffy layer of clouds.
Aang and Toph's help had definitely been invaluable to Iroh. Having maintained friendly ties with a few former brothers-in-arms had not been useless either. He had thus gathered a satisfactory amount of information about this illegal group which met on certain evenings, fomenting plans for rebellion, the probable beginnings of a military coup.
Iroh made a considerable effort to ignore the boiling of rage that the idea made quiver in his stomach. But he was sincere when he assured Tsuneo that he didn't want anything bad to happen to him and his son.
It seemed the Commender had also lost all combativeness. Shoulders slumped, face now drained of color, he no longer expressed the pride he had displayed when he advanced with a conquering step towards Iroh, his eyes shining with defiance.
"Listen, Commander. I want to help you. I think we can come to an agreement. You will find your friends this evening and inform them that you must give up all plans of action, whatever your plans have been. For my part, I will make sure that this annoying information never reaches the ears of my nephew. I'm sure he won't show the same leniency if he finds out, especially if your plans involve the princess."
The poor man seemed totally dejected.
"Kojiro…" he started
"...needs his father near him. His face is destroyed. His life will be hard enough as it is. Don't take what little he has left by making him the son of a traitor."
He put a friendly hand on the Commander's shoulder, who gave a small sniffle.
"He was such a handsome boy, General, if you knew," he sobbed. "So beautiful and so promising! He can't even use his bending anymore. His own fire terrifies him! He can hardly stand having the flame of a candle brought near him! And when he speaks, Almighty Gods, we hardly understand what he is saying! He is almost blind. He couldn't even explain to me, either orally or in writing, what had happened with the princess. I'm not even sure he remembers it."
Iroh couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. He had hoped to get information about what had happened. Apparently, he would have to look elsewhere to learn about Azula's outburst of rage. But that was definitely not what Tsuneo wanted to hear.
"I can imagine the ordeal you are going through my friend," he said instead. "You know that I lost my only son. I understand how you feel. Seeing your child's life and future cut short at such a young age. It's unbearable."
Tsuneo made a strange sound that might have sounded like laughter if his desperation hadn't been so obvious. He wiped his eyes and tried to regain his composure.
"I never got the chance to tell you how sorry I was for what happened to your son, General Iroh."
The painfully familiar feeling, like a dagger through the heart, went through Iroh, as it always did when Lu-Ten was mentioned. It was still just as painful, even thirteen years later. The idea that he could lose Zuko in the same way, that the one he considered his other son could be taken away from him… it was intolerable.
"I sacrificed my son to my dreams of greatness and my thirst for power, Tsuneo. This is a mistake I will never forgive myself for. Our children should not bear the brunt of our dreams, our aspirations, or whatever motivations. Even less of our desires for revenge. You want to protect your son. I understand. I have to protect my nephew and my niece. As you know, I'm the only parent they have left. What my niece did is irreparable, and I swear to you that a trial will be held as soon as she recovers her strength. But I implore you to believe me when I tell you that she acted under the influence of her illness and that she was not fully conscious of her acts."
"What condition is she in?" Tsuneo stopped him, getting a questioning look from Iroh. "I mean, the princess? Does she suffer any sequels?"
The spark Iroh saw in Tsuneo's brown eyes was not concern, but hope, a wild hope that ate his soul with a fierce appetite.
Iroh decided that he could grant him this pleasure:
"My niece is still in a lot of pain. It's still impossible for her to move around on her own and she can only stand sitting for a few hours a day because of her pelvis. All her bones have not yet healed. She needs rest and the combined care of our best doctors and Waterbenders to regain her health."
"So that's why Masters Taïma and Katara gave up on my son's recovery? To heal the woman who did this to him?"
"I'm afraid giving up isn't the right word. Master Taïma has been the princess's doctor for more than 4 years now. As for Master Katara, I know that she hasn't spared her efforts lately, whether it is to help my niece or your son. Zuko insists a lot that they are the first to take care of his dear sister. But I believe that Aang came daily to help Kojiro."
"And her face?" Tsuneo asked eagerly, not seeming to have listened to a word Iroh had just said. "How is her face?"
"I don't understand…" Iroh replied, taken aback.
"Her face?" he repeated with the same ardor. "Is it intact? Is she still like before?"
Iroh could see where Tsuneo was coming from and although he understood the legitimate desire behind those words, he couldn't give him that satisfaction.
"Fortunately, my niece will not have to suffer this kind of after-effects and her legendary beauty has not been affected."
Silence fell. The two men looked at the sky in which the last aircraft disappeared. Calm had fallen on the take-off base deserted by the soldiers who were busy just minutes ago. Iroh suddenly felt very tired. Securing his nephew's back required more energy than he had thought and turned out to be a less rewarding mission than he had imagined. Each step of this inextricable investigation reinforced his fears a little more. Zuko was sinking and he was taking the hard-won peace with him. The surly, stubborn boy he had watched grow into a good, wise man, whose metamorphosis he had witnessed with pride, was reconnecting with the old version of himself. For this girl. Behind every mistake Zuko made, there had always been the beautiful ruby-lipped face of the fascinating Fire Nation princess.
Iroh often blamed himself for this, but he had never managed to love his niece, not even like her. Everything about her reminded him of Ozai. He couldn't believe the devotion she showed to her brother was real, let alone the sincerity of her love for him.
Zuko had hated and loved her with the same passion. They had spent months chasing each other around the world. Zuko once used to pretend he wanted to put her down, but each encounter was a new challenge for the honest man he was trying to become, a new test, a new temptation.
A barely audible whisper broke the silence and pulled Iroh out of his thoughts. He turned his head towards Tsuneo. The Commander was now staring at his metal breeches, eyes downcast. Iroh leaned towards him to hear the content of his words:
"What a shame..." he said. "What a shame..."
Zuko hadn't expected this to be easy, or for everything to go back to how it was before. Taima had warned him that these things took time.
He wasn't sure what he had imagined. Screams, tears perhaps? Insults or blows? Or outbursts of tenderness, affectionate caresses, stolen kisses?
Languorous embraces under the sheets, behind closed doors? Mai's importunate voice whispered in his head.
Zuko didn't know what he had really imagined and hoped for, and how he would have reacted. But he had certainly not expected this cold indifference, these prolonged silences, these contemptuous looks that were the only thing she offered him.
Part of him was relieved that Azula had given up trying to seduce him. Another wanted to scream in frustration.
She was driving him crazy.
She only spoke to him with restraint, stingy with smiles, and never looked him in the eye when he spoke to her. Everything about her demeanor was carefully calculated to make Zuko feel perfectly stupid in her presence. She only spoke to him coldly and condescendingly, not even deeming him worthy of her sarcasm. She made no effort to hide from him the exasperation he inspired in her.
When the atmosphere between them became too heavy, he would leave the room, deeply upset, and go out for some fresh air, far from her, far from her arrogance and resentment. When he would return, a few hours later, terribly confused, his heart overflowing again with affection for the little sister he had almost lost, he found her in the same place, in her bed or sitting alone in her wheelchair. He would throw himself on her knees and beg her to forgive him for his impatience and bad temper. She would offer him only a wall of silence and would withdraw from his caresses and all his attempts at reconciliation.
She couldn't stand his presence and couldn't tolerate his absence either.
She punished him for having left her alone, reproached him for his betrayal and his abandonment with dark looks, disdainful exclamations.
By her coldness and her distance, she exasperated his desires. She put in each sigh, in each raised eyebrow, a haughty grace, and at the same time a sensuality that made Zuko lose his mind. And that made her even more desirable to him.
He would shudder at the way she puckered her lips that she had started to paint red again – after Zuko had the cosmetics entering the palace checked a thousand times.
At night, unable to sleep, he would think back to her graceful swan's neck that she presented to him when she turned her head to look elsewhere. The almost fading traces of her fingers marbled her neck and the sight of them brought him back to more reasonable thoughts.
However, the separation during the time she passed in prison, and the anguished hours spent at her bedside after the fall that almost cost her life, had exacerbated Zuko's feelings.
They never touched each other unless absolutely necessary. Zuko would help her pass from her bed to her chair and from her chair to the bed. He'd carry her as a husband carries his wife to their nuptial bed. But the ceremony ended there. She avoided meeting his gaze and he tried to ignore the increased beating of their hearts which raced in unison whenever they were too close to each other.
He wondered if, under this mask of indifference, she was struggling, like him, against a ferocious desire that was beyond her Her anger towards her brother must save her at least from succumbing to it. He himself had only to remember what had almost cost him this destructive flame which had slowly consumed him since the night when she knelt before him.
He sometimes found himself, at night, when he was alone in a cold, empty bed, replaying that famous evening in his head. Director of his own imagination, he placed his actors – always the same two– in new settings, wrote their dialogues in dreams, imagined gestures, caresses that were more and more burning. Invariably, these daydreams led him to seek a shameful and solitary pleasure. His sheets were the embarrassing witnesses to these fantasies.
He had to contain himself so as not to give in to the urge to join her through the secret passage that led to her apartments. Zuko had hesitated to reveal to the guards the existence of this underground known only by members of the royal family and friends to whom they had shown them: Aang, Ty Lee... The risk of a new attack against Azula could not be ruled out, especially since she woke up. It had become difficult to hide from the whole world that the princess was very much alive and regaining her strength a little more each day.
He should have mentioned the secret passage to Kadao. The latter would have posted his guards there. But to reveal its existence was to close the door to magnificent possibilities.
This passage had begun to fascinate Zuko recently. At night, he would turn his back on the tapestry that hid it so as not to think about it. Instead, he was staring out the window, trying to focus his mind on more pressing matters: the Nation's security, Mai, how to reconnect with his friends.
But always, his thoughts brought him back to the passage. It seemed to him that it was attracting him, that it was calling his name, that it was growing immeasurably, like the gaping jaws of some monster ready to devour Zuko's reason.
For Zuko, this tunnel became a paradise whose access was forbidden to him. He knew that if he entered it, it would be a one-way trip.
In his head, he would sometimes see him, in the middle of the night, taking the tunnel to her room, joining a languid Azula that the night would make more docile. The surprise of seeing him arrive would melt her waxen face and her mask of contempt and she would fall into his arms, offered and passionate.
Other times, he would invent a meeting halfway. Driven mad by desire, the two met at the crossroads leading to their respective rooms. Once the surprise passed, they threw themselves on each other, unable to restrain any longer the prisoner flame that rumbled in their bodies.
In Zuko's troubled mind, the tunnel was the sanctuary of their forbidden love, a crossroads of possibilities.
Zuko knew that was insane and that his guilty thoughts should remain simple fantasies. He had no real intention of trying anything with Azula and the very idea of sleeping with her repelled him as much as it excited him. But when he realized he couldn't fight the daydreams any longer, he allowed himself to imagine their lovemaking. Azula was a very attractive young woman and he had needs. A man has the right to dream, right? As long as he was just imagining, he wasn't doing anything wrong, was he?
Anyway, even if he had wanted to, it was impossible. Azula couldn't even walk on her own. He dreamed of touching her but was terrified of hurting her. Despite the undeniable progress she was making thanks to the rehabilitation Taïma and Katara offered, no one could say when she would regain full possession of her body.
She barely managed to take a few steps holding on to two parallel bars between which the healers asked her to walk.
Zuko watched these harrowing scenes with the feeling that his heart was being ripped from his chest. He watched her fall, collapse on the ground, get up, holding her still sore ribs, still held in place by a corset that emphasized the slenderness of her waist. Then resume her progress, courageously, eyes clouded with pain, rage and frustration.
No, he wouldn't do anything. The feverish hugs they shared the day she woke up were just a fond memory. Sometimes, when he looked away or read, sitting next to her in his armchair, he felt Azula's blazing gaze upon him. Was she waiting for him to take the first step? Was her suppressed anger concealing a secret and repressed love? Or was it just fury that ignited her sparkling eyes?
Zuko was starting to wonder if Azula's flirtatious attitude over the previous months was just a symptom of her madness. Now that her mind was healing, were those feelings gone?
Sometimes Zuko found himself fearing and regretting it. Then he would reassure himself. The night in the bathroom, when Azula had wanted to take him in her mouth, she wasn't sick yet. She was in full possession of her faculties. It was indeed the lust and the desire to please him he had read in her amber eyes.
Immediately, he blamed himself for harboring such hope. What sane man could wish for his own sister to want him in that way?
The same question haunted him day and night: Did Azula truly loved him, or did she act that way – like everyone but him seemed to believe – to manipulate him, take his throne, obtain new favors, an extra ounce of power?
When he had seen her again later, after that disastrous evening, she had already begun to slide slowly to madness. So how could he be sure? Could he trust the pitiful declaration of love she had made to him in the dungeon? Should he really believe the words of a poor madwoman in the middle of a crisis?
And besides, what did he really want? What was the worst? That she only used her charms to achieve her own ends, or that she was truly in love with him?
He would have given anything to find out.
He would have liked at least to have the right to hold her against him, to take her hand. In all good honor, like a brother. It wasn't forbidden, was it? But she even denied him that right. She tolerated him kissing her on the cheek in the morning and in the evening and Zuko found himself looking forward to these fleeting moments of intimacy.
For everything else, he contained himself. His unnatural lust had nearly cost him Azula. He had lost Mai… They had made him lose all discernment and his friends no longer trusted him.
He knew it, although they were still there, eager to maintain a peace that seemed a little more compromised every day.
The invisible threat of the Earth Kingdom occupied his mind almost as much as his sister. No one knew where Lu Fang was now, and the best Fire Nation squads had proven unable to locate Kuei's Minister of Armies. Since his catastrophic escape from Yu Dao, no one had seen him. Yet it continued to rain letters. They were coming from nowhere, always containing the same message.
The people of Earth demand the extradition of Princess Azula.
No threats, no blackmail. Nothing. Just those ten hand-drawn words in thin, slanting script that had all the weight of a declaration of war.
Zuko received one or two per day. All of them ended in ashes before they could reach the Council. Zuko was careful not to show them. The old men would panic, and that was the last thing he needed.
Thus, the elusive Lu Fang knew that Azula had survived. He knew she was in the palace, and no longer in the prison where she was to rot. The news had spread quickly throughout the nation and Zuko had little doubt about the identity of the informant.
This confirmed his presumptions. Mai must have been at Lu Fang's side and plotted with him, whispering their darkest secrets in this brute's ear.
This silent threat kept Zuko awake almost as much as the forbidden thoughts that assaulted his mind.
Sending Azula back to prison was out of the question, not now that there was proof that she was not fully responsible for her actions. Zuko remained resolutely deaf to the advice of the Elders who suggested that he at least send her back to the asylum until her complete recovery. According to them, to ease tensions. Officially, they could always pretend she was locked up and silence the malcontents. What would they have suggested if they had known about the anonymous letters that were waiting for Zuko every night on his pillow?
Zuko had to contain himself not to destroy the Temple and all its occupants in a deluge of fire.
"My sister was seriously injured, the victim of a heinous plot. We are talking about high treason and when we hold those responsible for this vile attack, they will have to answer for their crime. In the meantime, Azula remains here, safe, near me. She is of royal blood. Her place is in the palace."
The Sages nodded but Zuko knew they wouldn't stop there. Without Uncle Iroh by his side to temper his ardor, Zuko was sure that the Elders would have already begun impeachment proceedings. And he probably would have given them reasons to do so.
It was like sitting on top of a volcano ready to erupt at any moment. How ironic it was if you remembered that the palace was located precisely in the crater of a dormant volcano.
Like the storm you hear rumbling in the distance, the threat grew closer every day.
Mai knew the secret passages of the palace, perhaps better than himself. She enjoyed the double benefit of having been Azula's friend and the Fire Lord's wife.
As more days passed, more grew the fear in Zuko's mind.
But he still didn't talk about the tunnel.
He relied on his uncle's know-how and his impressive network. As the Grand Lotus, Uncle Iroh had contacts everywhere. He had made it his mission to find Mai and the odd-eyed man, this strange individual whom the old man suspected of having helped the Fire Lady poison the princess, before abducting her and throwing her from the top of the jail.
Ty Lee had jumped, stifling an exclamation of horror upon hearing this. Azula was still unconscious then. The young woman had come into the bedroom to brush Azula's hair when Iroh had entered to report to Zuko on his investigation. The young warrior had then explained, her cheeks a little red, that she had seen this strange-eyed boy once. Azula had ordered him to carry two letters: one for Kadao, the other for Zuko. Iroh had listened to her story, bewildered.
So, Mai had known about the meeting. Had she been there? Had she met Azula? Did they fight? Zuko remembered finding Mai weird that night, but by then he was too upset by the revelation of what his sister had done to Kojiro to worry about it.
The next day, he had found a distraught Azula in her bedroom. An unexpected confrontation with Mai would no doubt have worsened her already bad condition.
Mai and her spy had been given free rein to act. And to think that all this time, they were destroying Azula slowly, right before Zuko's eyes.
At the same time, Zuko had thought back with growing unease to the coded letter, to his missed date with Azula.
I will give you what you want.
Feeling the inquisitive gaze of his uncle weighing on him, Zuko had blushed miserably, like a kid caught in the act.
It was only a matter of time before Uncle Iroh broached the hot topic of him and Azula's relationship. He knew that the old man did not appreciate his nephew spending his days in the company of the woman who aroused the anger and distrust of his entire nation. There was almost no way he hadn't heard of the incest rumors. The old man was silent for now, but Zuko knew he was watching his every move and Zuko avoided touching and looking at Azula when Iroh was in the same room.
Zuko divided his time between a hostile and apathetic Azula and the Council Chamber where he spent boring hours searching for solutions to ease the tensions with the Earth Kingdom and the pandemonium plaguing his own nation. He himself was struggling to focus on what his ministers were saying, eager to find his sister.
Despite the relief of knowing she was safe, Zuko was not happy, and he was completely exhausted. He only dreamed of one thing, of taking Azula with him and getting away from here.
A place where there would be a beach. The presence of the sea had always soothed their fiery temper and it became easier to understand each other with the lullaby of the waves in the background. It was already like that when they were children. There, he would have attempted reconciliation. He would have fought to regain the trust she had taken so long to give him. They would have had plenty of time to reflect on the contradictory and confused feelings that agitated them.
At night he returns to his own apartments reluctantly. He would have preferred to stay with Azula to protect her, but Taïma had opposed it. Azula needed proper rest. Ty Lee took care of her protection. She slept on the cot on which Zuko and Taïma had taken turns watching the princess during her long sleep.
It was strange how Azula and Ty Lee found each other. It was as if there was no need for words. Azula knew that Ty Lee saved her. Although she claimed to remember only a few snippets of the days before her imprisonment, she knew full well what had happened in the training yard.
The sweet and compassionate Ty Lee had forgiven everything. Zuko would watch, a little jealous, at their almost natural reconciliation.
Why did Azula keep resenting him? He had simply done what was necessary. Both to protect his friends and to protect her. She could understand, right?
Why was she refusing him her affection, his brotherly love? He had given up everything for her, he had trampled on his marriage, he had drawn the wrath of all nations, including his own. And she continued to treat him with that perfectly unbearable contemptuous indifference.
The sane Azula showed an almost monastic restraint compared to her sick version. And he sometimes feared that by dint of pretending to hate him, she would really end up not loving him anymore.
"One more step, Princess, you can do it!"
"Come on, Azula! You can do it!"
Azula gave a strange sound between moan and growl and finally collapsed halfway between the two parallel bars,
Ten feet. I can't even make ten feet!
As Ty Lee rushed to help her up, she wiped away the tears of rage that had just escaped her eyes as discreetly as she could. She ignored her friend's helping hand and rolled onto her side, her cheeks flushed with shame.
No mockery, no judgment was to be feared from Taïma and Ty Lee. These two women were goodness made human. They would have been unable to see the weakness, had it danced naked before them.
"I don't need any help," she spat in anger, "I can get up on my own!"
"No, you cannot."
Shut your mouth!
Azula had to make a considerable effort not to turn her head towards the specter of her mother who was standing in the corner of the salon, transformed into a rehabilitation room, her hands hidden in her large sleeves. Of course, she had to be there to witness her daughter's humiliation. And although Azula had specifically asked her to spare her her opinions, she couldn't resist commenting on everything her daughter was doing. With an obvious preference for what she was doing wrong.
Luckily, Azula was now able to stop answering her out loud. It was undoubtedly a progress. The treatment was definitely working. The voices were only occasionally heard, and the content of their words had become banal. They no longer asked her to do forbidden things, like hurting other people. When she awoke in the morning, while everything was still asleep, the song of a couple of jays that had made their nest near her window would reach her from outside. And this melodious sound seemed to Azula the simplest and most wonderful thing in the world.
Azula wondered how long she had been deprived of birdsong. The voices would fill the universe and occupied her so much that sometimes it seemed to her that she was living in another world. In her tormented mind, the others would exist only as mere blurry, indistinct figures that just passed by and ignored the desperate hand she held out to them. Voices and hallucinations were the only real and tangible thing in this world of illusions and chimeras. With what relief she had realized their disappearance!
In the same way she now managed to control the anguish which sometimes swelled in her chest until it was all encompassing, and which still threw her into uncontrollable hysterics a few weeks before.
And best of all, Father was gone.
Azula had begun to rebuild the wall, slowly, brick by brick. Sometimes the memory would come back, without warning, it stole her breath from her throat, grew, darkened all the scenery around her. But for some time, its outlines were less clear. It was more of a feeling, an almost instinctive terror that she couldn't even explain. If Azula had to do so, she would have compared it to the feeling of unease that you keep in your heart in the hours following a nightmare whose details escape you. She always remembered it had something to do with the Black Sun and the ugly scar that lay across her hip. The one that seemed to fascinate Taïma when she helped her wash.
Azula didn't like Taima's gaze on the old wound. She didn't like what she saw in her blue eyes still full of maddening solicitude and sadness. Nor did she like the way she spoke to her now.
"Come on Azula, be reasonable. Let Ty Lee help you; you're going to hurt yourself getting up on your own."
"I am totally capable of getting up on my own!"
...you traitor!
Azula immediately blamed herself for having that thought. The voices might have spared her, she no longer saw Father and the memory no longer obsessed her continually, however she could not always manage to control her thoughts, nor the angry words and the insults that still sometimes escaped her lips.
Taima had made up her mind a long time ago not to be offended by it. She kept a calm face in all circumstances. Sometimes it made Azula want to push her rudeness further, to see how far she could go without hurting the young woman.
It was easier with Ty Lee who was quite incapable of concealing the slightest emotion. Already, her moist gray eyes betrayed the pain she now felt at being rejected like this.
"You're a cruel person," Mother reproached her, visible anger knitting her well-shaped black eyebrows. "Everyone is trying to help you. Don't be so rude! it's unworthy of a princess."
This time Azula chose to ignore her. Mother was right of course. Azula was no longer fifteen and it was childish to try to provoke Taïma. She had betrayed her, yes, but she had also saved her life.
Azula wasn't stupid. She knew what Taïma had done and all that she was sacrificing for her.
And Ty Lee, without whom she would have died, left to the appetite of the crows on the black reefs that surrounded the prison. They hadn't talked about it. There had been no need. That's what was good about Ty Lee. She talked a lot, often for nothing, but knew when to be quiet.
"Azula, please listen to Taïma!" Ty Lee pleaded, kneeling beside her.
Sometimes she knew when to be quiet, Azula corrected herself.
Azula raised her hand to deter Ty Lee from touching her, as she would have chased away a fly. Azula was determined to show that she was not the poor pathetic and incapable victim that everyone wanted to see in her. Trying to use her hands to support herself she tried to get up but her still fragile right arm collapsed under her weight and her legs refused to obey her. She let out a cry of rage. She had to do it, she had to do it! She was the Princess of the Fire Nation, the Conqueror of Ba Sing Se, the Blue Flame Prodigy! The fact she hadn't been able to elicit more than a faint orange flame since waking up didn't count!
"The face scorcher, the incestuous sister, the crazy princess, the baby killer..." her mother completed to the tune of a nursery rhyme.
"Stop! Shut your mouth! Spare me your stupid song!" she shouted furiously.
Ty Lee and Taïma stopped. Azula saw them exchange a furtive glance before returning their attention to her, looking deeply embarrassed.
Azula had refrained from telling them about the hallucinations that continued to torment her. But obviously they knew. The last time, she had managed to hide from everyone that her mother still appeared daily. Then Ursa had disappeared, little by little, her features becoming less and less distinct, her outlines more blurred, her features merging gradually into the void. Eventually, she had stopped visiting Azula, overnight. Would she soon disappear in the same way in the weeks or months to come? Was she going to abandon her again?
Azula had to be more careful. If the others knew she was still insane, they would probably send her back to the asylum.
No matter how much Zuko spluttered apologies in his pathetic voice, how much he swore to her on his life that he would keep her close to him no matter what, that he would always protect her, it was hard to believe him after what he did.
Something in Azula's face must have betrayed her grief as Ty Lee's hand rested gently on her shoulder. Azula decided to let it go. Just this time.
Each on one side, Ty Lee and Taïma helped their princess to get up. When she was up, she clung with her two trembling hands to one of the bars. Her wobbly legs barely carried her, and the cold took hold of her.
She's always been cold lately. It was as if her inner fire had dried up when her body crashed against the rocks.
The faint orange flames she managed to create in her palm only cast a hazy glow that lit little more than her face. They would waver for a few seconds in her hand and disappeared.
It will come back, Taïma had assured her. It is not uncommon after a serious injury to see our power reduced. A master of your stature will soon regain all her power! Look at the progress you've made in two weeks!
It was easy for her to say. She exuded health. Her skills as a waterbender increased with each day she spent in the company of this southern peasant girl.
But she? She couldn't even walk on her own!
"I don't want to do it anymore," she stammered, ashamed of this admission of weakness and the whining tone of her voice. "I am tired."
Ty Lee closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around her. Azula's first instinct was to free herself. But her friend's body radiated a pleasant warmth, and she felt a little less depressed when she released her.
"Sure. Come, I'll take you back to rest in your room."
"No! I'm tired of spending my days in this dismal room that smells of medicine! I want to go out!"
"Of course, Azula. I'll take you to the gardens", Ty Lee replied happily.
"No!" Azula whined. "I don't want to go to the gardens either! I'm tired of spending my time in this stupid place!"
Taïma took it upon herself to answer, sparing Ty Lee the duty of repeating for the thousandth time what she already told Azula every day:
"You are well aware that Zuko has strictly prohibited your leaving the private quarters of the royal family. Your safety is at stake."
"Damn it, Zuko! Since when do we care what this coward thinks?"
She looked hard at her two companions and the exasperation rose a notch. Their miserable faces reflected something she hated: fear, weakness.
"Don't be so harsh!" her mother scolded her behind them. "Just because Zuko indulges you doesn't mean they can disobey him with impunity."
"Okay, fine!"
The answer, spit out loud, could just as easily be addressed to Taïma and Ty Lee. With a sigh of relief, the acrobat went back between the bars that Taïma pushed aside from each other to enlarge the passage. Ty Lee put an arm around Azula's waist and helped her to her wheelchair.
The princess winced with each step, painful twinges shooting through the hardly mended bones of her pelvis.
Taima tried in vain to soothe her, to assure her that her legs were in perfect condition and that she would walk again without any problem, that she simply had to overcome her apprehensions. According to her, it was all in her head. But it wasn't Taïma who felt searing pain in her pelvis every time she put one foot in front of the other! Not to mention her head spinning furiously and the nauseous dizziness that seized her every time she undertook a too presumptuous physical effort.
Taïma and Katara claimed that Azula's bones were all repaired. They prided themselves on the medicine of their barbarian people: according to them, only the healing methods of the Water Tribe could mend bones in just a few days.
But Azula knew from experience that such injuries leave their marks and that her firebending, as well as her martial skills, would be diminished for a long time, if not permanently.
Azula kept her head down the whole way from the improvised rehabilitation room to the royal garden. She dreaded meeting the mocking gaze of the servants they passed. She knew very well that everyone took great delight in her downfall, in the unexpected spectacle of the once so powerful princess, now reduced to the state of an impotent old woman.
Once in the garden, Ty Lee pushed Azula's chair into the shade of the giant camphor tree.
"Leave me Ty Lee. I want to be alone."
"I'll be there," Ty Lee replied, making a noticeable effort not to sound hurt and pointing to the fountain where she could continue to watch the princess while giving her some privacy.
"Thank you, Ty."
The acrobat jumped a little and Azula felt a pang in her chest. Ty Lee wasn't used to the princess thanking her or apologizing.
She watched her friend walk away. She could never repay her debt. Azula still couldn't believe that Ty Lee forgave her. She had tried to kill her. She would have done it if not for the intervention of Katara and the sassy little earthbender. She didn't doubt it for a second and knew that Ty Lee was just as aware of this fact.
But that wasn't why she asked Ty Lee to leave her alone.
No. Now she wanted to think of Zuko.
Being mad at Zuko was a grueling activity that cost her too much energy. Displaying her contempt while holding back her gall and venom was almost a feat.
Other times it was easier, especially when he pestered her with questions about her health or literally dragged himself to her knees begging for forgiveness, staring at her with his insufferable beaten-dog eyes.
And hear his false promises all day long!
I won't let anyone hurt you. I swear to you.
"As if you didn't take the slightest pleasure in seeing him crawling at your feet like that!" Ursa mocked, sewing quietly, sitting cross-legged next to her. "You never lost an opportunity to humiliate him."
Azula could finally answer her without fear that prying eyes and ears might hear or see.
"It was fun at first," she admitted, "But it gets boring. And I'm not sure he'll take it much longer."
Indeed, Zuzu sometimes lost his patience and disappeared for hours. Azula shouldn't blame him for it, but she couldn't help but be furious at his neglect when he walked in, his head down, and came to sit down next to her, both ashamed and confused.
All this to impose his contrite silence on her for hours.
If at least he filled his silence with tender gestures or looks. Real looks, not those fearful glances cast haphazardly. She wanted him to look at her with desire in his eyes, like the night she had found him in her room. But instead, he kept turning his head away as if afraid of being burned by the fire that ignited her amber eyes. All she read in those of her stupid brother was fear and mistrust.
When he touched her, it looked like he was afraid of hurting himself, or getting dirty. He would take her in his arms only reluctantly, barely long enough to transport her from her bed to her wheelchair, and he walked away immediately.
Yet he had looked so happy when he had hugged her the day she woke up. In his eagerness, he had even hurt her by leaning a little too much on her.
The days following her awakening had passed like a dream and Azula kept only a confused memory of them. But that she remembered.
Azula had hoped that once they were alone, they would share more intimate moments like this one. But she had been wrong. Now she wondered if she hadn't just dreamed these embraces.
Since then, he hardly approached her, as if he was afraid of breaking her. They told her that he had spent almost every night of those fifteen days she had passed between life and death at her bedside. However, since she had regained consciousness, he had not spent a single night with her, and she felt despaired for the coldness of her bed when she would have dreamed of a body at her side to warm it.
Azula knew now that he blamed himself for his own weakness and that he regretted each of their caresses, each of their embraces. She had been through it too. When it became impossible for her to deny the nature of her feelings for Zuko, shame and guilt had consumed her first. It had taken months, years for Azula to accept that she was in love with him. Would Zuko take so long to realize the facts? And if he kept lying to himself, how much longer would Azula be able to wait?
"Or he just doesn't love you. He doesn't touch you anymore and he barely looks at you because he's embarrassed. You disgust him. He is afraid that you will misinterpret his gestures and throw yourself on him at the first opportunity. It's the reason why he's so distant."
"But if you are right, why? Why did he kiss me? Why didn't he push me right away when I… when I…"
Shame prevented her from continuing.
"Men are sometimes stupid when it comes to sex," Ursa replied simply.
Discouragement fell suddenly on Azula's shoulders. Of course, her mother was right.
How could Zuko love a girl like her? A criminal, a psycho devoid of any morals, a poor creature with a broken body, not even able to walk or wash herself. It was different while she was still desirable… but now, what remained of the attractive woman she was once?
Azula looked up at the sky. The sun was almost overhead. Zuko would come at noon to join her. As he wouldn't find her in the living room nor her bedroom, he would then walk over here and silently push her wheelchair to the dining room where they would share a succulent meal that would taste like ashes in Azula's mouth. They wouldn't exchange a word, like at those stupid weekly dinners he used to invite her to in the months following her return from the asylum.
Finally, these dinners had ended up growing pleasant and it was at the end of one of them that he had returned her crown to her.
What reward could she hope for this time, from a brother who was afraid of her?
"He only stays with you to watch over you. He fears you. He knows what horrors you are capable of. He thinks you are..."
"A monster…" Azula completed without looking at her mother. "Yes, I know."
She heaved a deep sigh.
At least Zuko had the decency to spare her his stupid friends' company. Azula wasn't sure, though, that he was depriving himself of their presence just to please her. When Katara and the Avatar would come to visit, they only exchanged a few polite words with Zuko and they quickly left, as soon as Katara and Taima had finished examining Azula.
Had recent events compromised his friendship with the peasants? At least that would be something.
The blind girl would come sometimes, too. She was most often accompanied by Uncle Iroh. Azula wondered what this boorish girl liked in her old fool of an uncle. Obviously, he himself was enjoying the company of this strange barefooted wench. Azula supposed that for her uncle, anything was better than the monster that served as his niece.
Iroh never stayed longer than necessary to ask her about her health and if she was improving. Most of the time, he addressed Zuko directly who in turn answered him laconically. Then the two men would leave the room to talk privately, ignoring the bubbling rage Azula felt inside her.
They never said anything to her! For example, Zuko refused to talk about Mai. Azula was not stupid. She knew very well that the disappearance of the Fire Lady was not unrelated to her accident.
Luckily, she had Ty Lee.
Ty Lee had told her about the odd-eyed valet who was suspected of having replaced Azula's medication. The puzzle pieces had come together after that. In the days since she woke up, memories of what had happened had come back to her, one after the other, as nebulous as the fragments of a dream in the hours following dawn. Azula had no memory of what had caused her to fall from the top of the steep wall of the prison. Had the weird eyed man thrown her away on purpose? Did she accidentally fall? It didn't really matter. If the man's intention had been to bring her to Lu Fang, she would have died by now anyway.
It was all the fault of her dear sister-in-law who had mysteriously disappeared the very same night.
How could Azula have been stupid enough to believe Mai's venomous words? Ty Lee had never betrayed her. Mai had only told her that to arouse her suspicion and rob her of her only friend. Wasn't it enough for her to warm her brother's bed, when it should have been Azula?
However, Azula hadn't told anyone about the disastrous fight in her father's room. The memory of her humiliation was still fresh in her mind. And besides, it was useless. Even a slow-witted fool like her brother could figure out the role Mai had played in the latest events.
Azula had to admit that Mai had succeed in surprising her. She had manipulated everyone, for months. Yet her sudden departure showed that something must have gotten out of her control at some point. Azula would have given anything to find out what it was.
By now, Mai must have been somewhere, in some military camp, sharing Lu Fang's meal in the Commander's yurt.
Azula also longed to know what was being said in the council chamber, behind closed doors. In the past, she would have had no trouble sneaking behind the curtains to listen to the ramblings of the Fire Sages and ministers.
Zuko continued to treat her like a child.
"Don't worry about that. You need to focus on your recovery. I take care of the Nation and protect you. You must do everything to regain your health and learn to walk again."
As if this would suffice to allay her fears! He had instructed Taïma and Ty Lee to play the Princess's baby-sitters while he took wrong decisions. When would Zuzu admit he was nothing without her? Never had the Fire Lord shone so much as when she whispered advice in his ear. This parody of a sovereign he had become must seem quite laughable to all these traitors who were only waiting for the opportunity to get rid of her.
Neither prolonged exposure to a potent poison, nor illness, nor a thirty-feet fall had been enough to overcome the Fire Nation Princess. But the Fire Sages' poisonous words, Uncle Iroh, and the Avatar had the power to drive Zuko away from her. And that was not acceptable!
Zuko claimed he desired to protect her. So what was he waiting for to declare war on the Earth Kingdom? Azula suspected Zuko of being afraid to come face to face with Mai. That coward would never have the courage to put the noose around that traitor's neck.
"Are you sure? He didn't hesitate to throw you in prison though. And he said he loved you."
She could always count on Ursa to bring up some unpleasant truths.
What if Zuko keeps you away because he's trying to get rid of you too? Azula considered.
The situation was becoming urgent. Zuko could no longer shelter this embarrassing little sister between these walls. What would happen the moment she was strong enough to be transferred somewhere else? What if the old goats managed to convince her brother to deliver her to Lu Fang?
She had to find a solution.
Running away was excluded. In the state she was in, the imperial guards would have got hold of her before she could leave the confines of the royal palace. And then flee… flee for what? Where would she go?
Trying to seduce Zuko had been a dangerous game. It had nearly led to their downfall. It was still tempting.
Playing the role of the fragile and adoring little sister had proven quite effective in the past. Azula supposed that must flatter something in her brother's ego. A part of him that was running after the sense of his own importance. It could have something to do with their eternal rivalry, their endless need to feel superior to the other.
She considered letting him be the caring older brother he so badly wanted to be. She could still benefit from it. But she had gotten herself caught up in this little game, and that's where it had brought her. Far from maddening her, Zuko's protective attitude had only exacerbated Azula's desire to be his.
"Well, speaking of the devil..." Ursa gently interrupted her daughter's thoughts, without raising her head from her work.
Azula's heart raced furiously.
"Quick! Go away!" She hissed at her mother, who superbly ignored her.
She couldn't afford to reveal to Zuzu that her mind wasn't completely healed. He would take fright and probably hasten her departure.
But things would have been much different if all Azula had to do was demand her hallucinations to disappear so that they'd leave her alone.
Here he was approaching with his hesitant and ridiculous step. How could this clumsy boy also be this charismatic and authoritative king who sat majestically and intimidatingly behind the curtain of flames in the Throne Room? As he approached, he seemed to lose his confidence.
"Hey you!" He greeted her, giving her a shy smile. "How are you?"
He leaned down to kiss her cheek and Azula cursed herself for not being able to prevent her face from blushing.
Those stupid fraternal kisses, exasperatingly chaste, were the only sign of affection he still showed her. She had been content with it once, but with everything that had happened since then, she only felt a deep frustration. Craving so badly for such an insignificant gesture made Azula hate herself.
She caught sight of Ty Lee watching them from the fountain where she was sitting. It was at the edge of this sculpture that Azula first confessed to Ty Lee that she felt for a boy. She wondered if her friend remembered it too as she watched their interactions, no doubt filled with deep disgust.
"Sorry, what?" she asked, realizing she hadn't listened to a word Zuko was saying to her.
"I was saying this Council meeting had been interminable. I'm starving. Lunch must be waiting for us. Should we?"
This feigned courtesy, this overflowing tone of kindness, these eyes filled with an unbearable sweetness… Azula wanted to slap him and leave the traces of her sharp nails on his still intact cheek. She wanted to pull him by the hair and bring him closer to her face then bite, bite into his cheeks, into his lips, into his neck, until he was bleeding.
He only deserved her violence. She was already showing him too much indulgence by treating him with indifference. Why did he allow her to treat him like this? He was the Fire Lord and she openly despised him in everyone's eyes. He should have been furious, and it was as if he didn't care! She wanted to hurt him and couldn't. But if she had obeyed her instincts – all her instincts – he would have thought her crazy again or pushed her away in disgust.
If Zuko had ever wanted her, it was over. She should have known it wouldn't be forever. Even Mai's disappearance hadn't been enough to throw him into her arms. She had naively believed that his wife was the last bastion and that once this wall collapsed, he would no longer have had any reason to resist her charms.
Without waiting for her answer, Zuko called Ty Lee who joined them quickly, looking a little uncomfortable. Azula knew she didn't like being around when they were together. It was hard to say who was the most embarrassed of the three when they left the garden to go to the dining room.
Along the way, Azula decided she couldn't stand all this uncertainty anymore. Time had come for Zuko to prove his loyalty to her, and she thought she knew how to get it. But before that, she would have to prove hers to him, regain his trust. As well as that of the yokels he called his friends.
"That shouldn't take you more than a few hundred years... But I guess we can always try," her mother said dreamily, walking quietly beside them.
Shut up, Azula thought, not bothering to turn her head to see her well-shaped eyebrows frowning.
On their way they passed the Water Tribe peasant and the Kyoshi Warrior who turned their heads to avoid their gaze and hastily hurried on. And Azula finally thought, bitterly, that her mother was probably right.
Moisture seeped from the three walls inlaid with rocks of various colors and shapes. On the ceiling, the mouth of a long metal conduit whose other end came out of the ground, feet and feet above, led the oxygen into the small, filthy cell where Mai was waiting, lying on her back on a hard and stained mattress that laid on the floor.
She stared resolutely at the ceiling where the pipe was, as if dreaming of slipping through it to finally escape from her prison. Indifferent to the imposing figure of the man who was questioning her on the other side of the iron bars, she heaved a deep sigh and turned back to the wall, stroking its crumbly surface with her fingertips. Pieces of brownish earth fell from the wall onto the mattress and were added to the stains already covering it, like the points of a constellation.
"I understand your impatience and displeasure, Lady Mai, believe me. I'm a gallant man, you know." Ignoring the contemptuous snort with which Mai commented these words, he continued, "The idea of leaving such an elegant and prestigious woman to rot between the dripping walls of such a dingy cell shocks my imagination. I sometimes struggle to sleep at night thinking about it."
"Poor thing," Mai said flatly. "If you care so much, we can switch. I don't have any trouble with that. I wouldn't like to be the cause of your nightmares."
Lu Fang sneered. He couldn't help but like this non-bender with a fiery temper. The story his men had told him of her capture at the edge of the forest, where he had posted a few soldiers on duty, had fascinated him. Her fighting skills were truly extraordinary. If she hadn't been slowed down by the need to protect her family that day, they would never have come through her.
It occurred to him that nature was sometimes very unfair. A woman such as Lady Mai was made to receive at birth these prodigious gifts which were granted only to a chosen few. When Lu Fang thought that her husband, that wastrel, that notorious fool, not even able to make an heir to his wife, had inherited that talent and reigned over one of the greatest Nations in the world, the mere idea sickened him.
"Patience, my dear. I have already explained to you that such privileges can only be granted to distinguished guests."
"Fire Lady isn't a title prestigious enough for you?" she reacted, turning to him a dull look, a way for her to express her interest.
"Madam, where I come from, power, comfort and wealth are hardly obtained at birth. I have worked hard all my life to be where I am today. For me, the birth of a man hardly distinguishes him from others. Whether you are the wife of a bad and incompetent ruler, a simple whore from Ba Sing Se's lower ring, or even the Avatar himself doesn't predetermine your worth in my eyes. Only your deeds make you worthy of getting things."
"What a moving speech. You remind me of that fool Long Feng. You're one of those ambitious ones who thinks you have the right to rule the world just because life hasn't been kind to you. Please spare me the tearful tale of your miserable past."
"To tell you the truth, Madam, I come from a fairly well-heeled background. I could have lived a comfortable life if yours hadn't stripped me of everything that mattered."
"So that's it?" Mai answered, straightening up, her back against the wall, her arms crossed on her knees. "A mean Fire Nation soldier stole your teddy-bear and you're giving vent to your frustration against an entire people?"
Lu Fang's water-green eyes narrowed, causing small wrinkles to form all around.
"I am glad to see that your appalling conditions of detention have not harmed your sense of humor."
Mai didn't answer, only blinked once and raised her eyebrows in a look of supreme contempt. He continued, "Unfortunately, you see, it's a little more serious than that. To be specific, the Fire Nation took my family away from me..."
"Here we are," Mai sighed. "The tearful and pathetic tale of the brave little orphan who climbed the ranks on his own after spending years stealing rotten apples from vendor stalls and sleeping in the garbage. All the while vowing himself that he would one day have his revenge. It sounds like the script for a bad novel. Please spare me that."
"You take me by surprise, my dear. Knowing your husband and his fondness for his family members…" There he paused to make sure she got the hint. "I thought you were more sensitive to these kinds of matters."
Mai still didn't answer, but he noticed with satisfaction the small wrinkle that had formed between her two eyebrows, and which reflected her annoyance. Had he finally managed to hit a nerve?
"You see, I once had a younger sister."
"So what? Are you going to confess that you too, you liked to fuck her at night on the shabby bed of your hovel? In silk sheets or under rags, I hardly see the difference. But you are well placed to know that the value of our acts has nothing to do with our birth, right?"
Lu Fang cringed. Apparently, he would need more patience and resources than he had imagined to overcome the cold heart of this woman.
He found himself understanding what had pushed the Fire Lord into another woman's arms. Compared to this probably frigid, inflexible queen – and a chest as flat as that! – many options had to seem more desirable.
No way to show his trouble to this woman. Lu Fang had to keep the situation under control. He couldn't damage her too much either. He needed her to accomplish his plans.
Repressing the wave of anger he felt rising in him, he composed a smile and spoke:
"You are a smart woman, Lady Mai. I appreciate that. I am sure that together you and I could do great things. But since we are comparing each other's family situations..."
He paused for effect and pulled out of his pocket a small cloth-wrapped package which he stroked with his fingertips, almost lovingly. The little yelp of impatience that escaped Mai's lips did not escape him. But she didn't say a word and kept from asking what was in the package.
Too bad, he thought regretfully. Then he resumed:
"Siblings. Not always easy, is it? I don't think I'm wrong in saying that you have a younger brother yourself, do I?"
"If you try to strike a chord with me, you are wasting your time Lu Fang. I'm not the sentimental type. Go now. I don't know what that traitor Wu told you, but I won't help you overthrow Zuko. Nor to betray my nation."
"Who said anything about betraying your nation? By cutting off its head, you give it the unexpected opportunity to be reborn stronger and fairer."
Mai didn't answer, obviously not convinced. Good. She didn't really give him a choice. It was time to abandon all pretense.
"Alright, you're right, it looks like I'm wasting both of our time, although mine is more valuable than yours. I will therefore go straight to the point. Do you have any idea what this package contains?"
And he passed the little bundle between the bars of the cell.
Mai rose slowly and approached the bars. A silvery glow lit up her usually sleepy gaze, and Lu Fang knew he had won. Wu was right, as always.
"Give me that," Mai ordered in a low, anguished voice.
"Are you sure you want to see? This is not a pleasant view for a lady of your rank."
Before he could react, she had snatched the package from his hands. She opened it with feverish gestures, her fingers trembling, a mortal anguish in her slanted eyes. Lu Fang closed his own, took a deep, pleasant breath, and waited.
The scream came faster than he had imagined, and he heard a thud as the two small bloody fingers fell to the floor of the cell. He opened his eyes to a livid Mai who was standing, her back bent forward, one hand over her mouth to keep herself from throwing up, choking.
"Tom-Tom! What have you... you bastard! What have you done?"
"Come on, come on, my dear. There is no reason to panic. Your little brother is in perfect health and is already recovering from his injuries thanks to the good care of our best healers. Of course, he cried a lot. Kids, you know…. But no, forgive me, you hardly had the opportunity to have one."
Mai was now clinging to the bars with both hands, her eyes fixed on the two small cylinders of flesh at her feet, and still trying to catch her breath.
"If you… if you, son of a bitch, touch a hair of my brother again, I..."
"– Have I finally managed to strike a chord?" he quipped.
The Fire Lady kept silent and only raised two eyes as cold as a harsh winter. He read in them a desire for murder and revenge.
Alright, he thought, just what I need. Finally, she is able to feel something!
Lu Fang knew that when the time came, he would know how to redirect this hatred against another target. All he would have to do was hold before her eyes the proof that the Fire Nation princess had definitely taken her place in her husband's heart and convince her that this unnatural attraction was the root of all her suffering.
While he was planning, Mai had straightened up. Her thin face once again wore its mask of impassiveness despite the trails of tears that still streaked her cheeks, made gray by the penumbra.
"Where is he? Where are my parents?"
"Patience, My Lady, Patience. You see, I can't answer you yet. Your brother is a brave boy. An excellent future recruit for my army. We're just running out of cannon fodder to place in the front line!"
"You bastard! Filthy bastard! He's not even eight!"
"Eight, you say? Too young to seize all the intricacies of this sordid affair. But already old enough to understand that his older sister prefers to see him dismembered or thrown on the battlefield to protect an incestuous husband who doesn't even care about her."
After that, the discussion became less stimulating. The flood of insults that escaped the young woman's lips swept over him, with all the violence but also the impotence of the waves crashing against the unshakable rock.
He wasn't sure she had heard him when he asked her to think about his proposal and informed her that he would come back to see her soon.
He left the dungeons, a smirk stretching his square-jawed face.
In the distance, the prisoner's screams of rage continued to pursue him, echoing between the walls of the tunnel.
It was only a matter of time before he made the inflexible Fire Lady bend. But for his plan to succeed, he needed Wu. He had a new mission for him.
That's all for today! I hope you enjoyed.
This chapter does not answer all the questions I asked you in the previous chapter, of course, but that will come.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to respond and comment on the latest chapter! It's always a pleasure to read you !
Here are your homework for next time:
1) You could see in this chapter how Azula and Zuko are dying to get each other's attention. Which will crack first and under what circumstances?
2) What is Lu Fang going to ask Mai? What will he offer her in return? Will he offer her something in return? What do you expect from those characters?
3) What threat can Kojiro and his father pose to Zuko's crown? Will Iroh's threats be enough to contain their desire for revenge?