Sorry for the delay, longer than usual. I've been pretty busy lately to the point where I could barely read, write or translate at night. And I struggled to change details in later chapters, I had to constantly come back to this chapter to check if it remained consistent with what follows.
Another thing: This chapter has not yet been proofread. You might find errors. Sorry. I will change it as soon as my beta sends me the correct version. But I thought you had waited long enough and I wouldn't want you readers to lose interest!
In this chapter : Azula finds her friend Ty Lee, Lu Fang is back and a medallion reappears! As for Taïma, she will have a lot on her plate to fix all that mess!
Chapter 30 – Where a medallion is found
"I missed you, Ty Lee."
Ty Lee jolted a little in disbelief and sharply turned her gray eyes to Azula. She couldn't remember her friend verbally expressing her affection to her before. Ty Lee knew that Azula loved her very much. She had guessed it by the way the princess frowned when she saw her laughing or having fun with the other girls of the Court; by the fact that she let her comb and braid her hair for hours without complain, that she would invite her at nightfall to share her dinner. But Azula had never used the words to say it.
"I missed you too!" she answered, a large and genuine smile lighting up her face.
Azula sat down at the foot of the camphor tree under which they liked to shelter. From there, they could see, without being seen, the comings and goings of the ladies and the guards who were patrolling in the galleries. It was the perfect place for gossip and confidences. It was not far from there that Azula had confessed to Ty Lee the hopeless love she felt for a boy. A boy who had turned out to be her own brother.
Ty Lee wondered if Azula's good mood meant that her wishes had come true. She was unusually exuberant. Though, Zuko didn't seem to share her joy when they had left him with his uncle in the hall. Did he do something he regretted?
"How were your holidays?" Ty Lee ventured in a moment of audacity. "Did you rest well?"
"Yes! Look at this!" And Azula turned her hand over to show her palm. After a few seconds, a pure blue flame erupted from it, illuminating her pointed chin and momentarily coloring her red lips with a delicate purple hue. She threw her palm above her head and a magnificent azure arc crossed the sky before falling in a rain of ashes on the grass, yellowed by this harsh summer.
"Oh! You can do it again?" Ty Lee marveled in excitement. She couldn't help but jump to her feet. The last time they had seen each other, Azula could barely hold a flame for more than a few seconds in her hand. And they were orange then.
"What about lightning? Do you bend it too?"
In response, the princess pointed two fingers towards the galleries that surrounded the garden and released a lightning bolt that came to die on a metal pillar. The shock made it shaking. A long vibration rose around the column and a shrill cry resounded in the gallery, distorted by the echo. Ty Lee saw the young Sanae running away, screaming.
"Hello Sanae! Glad to see you again!" Azula shouted as the girl flew away.
Azula burst into a cruel laughter. Ty Lee couldn't remember ever seeing her so cheerful and despite the guilt she felt for the poor Sanae, she couldn't suppress a smile. Yet something about this almost indecent hilarity disturbed her deeply.
"How did it happen?" she asked, eager to know. "How did your firebending return?"
"Some motivations are more effective than others," Azula replied evasively, comfortably leaning back against the trunk of the camphor tree. "Taima was right: I hadn't lost my power: it was simply blocked. I needed a click, a trigger."
"And isn't that trigger called..."
"You're really curious, Ty Lee," Azula cut her off, arching her eyebrows with a smile. Then, with a deep sigh of contentment, she closed her eyes and lifted her nose skyward, as if to enjoy the caress of the sun on her ivory skin.
Ty Lee bit her lip nervously. Azula's tone, and her unprecedented cheerfulness left no room for doubt. Ty Lee hadn't seen her this happy since… She remembered perfectly when she had seen her like this. It had been in the days following the night she had caught her in Zuko's lap. At the time, Ty Lee still didn't know it, but Azula was slowly slipping into madness.
Ty Lee wondered which prospect was worse. Still, they wouldn't have…not in front of Aang and the others, would they? And here the realization came to her:
"Azula, where are Aang and Katara? And the others? I thought they were supposed to come home with you."
Azula's smile faded and a shadow passed over her eyes. Ty Lee feared she had offended her and for the first time in years, she thought she saw the proud and cruel princess she had known as a teenager. A cold shiver ran up her spine.
"They chose to go home, to the South", she announced coldly seeing Ty Lee's questioning eyebrows. "Things…didn't turn out the way I imagined", she confessed without looking up at her.
"What do you mean?"
"Zuzu and the Avatar had a fight. About me… It-it wasn't a very pleasant scene", Azula admitted, indicating by her voice inflection that she wasn't ready to talk about it just yet. "Finally, the fact is that they took off with their hairy monster and left us there, with no solution to get back here."
"So you were left alone with Zuko?"
"For almost a week, yes!" She said, giving her voice a dreamy inflection.
A smile curled her lips at the mention of this stay and Ty Lee had to fight against the familiar feeling of nausea which was invading her by successive waves.
Deciding to drop all pretense, and because Azula obviously wanted to play on her nerves, she took a deep breath and asked the question that was burning her lips:
"Did you and Zuko have…"
"How curious you are!", Azula echoed herself, her eyes shining with mischief. "All I can tell you is that if Zuko still had grievances against you, they are no longer justified..."
"Why that?" Ty Lee asked, taken aback.
"Because without your wise advice, I probably wouldn't have succeed to ... how did you say already? Yes!… to make him happy." She uttered the last word under her breath and bit her lip in mock embarrassment, suppressing a small chuckle. "Of course I didn't tell him! I didn't want him to know that I was that ignorant in that field! I don't think he would have found it very attractive."
Disgust swept over Ty Lee so violently that she had a hard time concealing it, and as a diversion she feigned a sudden fit of coughing.
"Something's wrong, Ty Lee?"
"No no!" she replied. "I'm fine!" But she couldn't help her face blushing in confusion.
At least your red cheeks will make your little comedy more convincing, she thought.
"Aren't you asking me for more details?" Azula inquired. "I can tell you, if you want."
Ty Lee politely declined the offer with a grimace that she tried to turn into a smile and a vague wave of her hand.
"It's very intimate, Azula, you don't have to…"
"Does this bother you?" the worried voice of the princess interrupted.
Ty Lee looked down at Azula to see her bronze eyes looking up at her with the expression of the defendant awaiting the judge's final verdict. The joy that had been animated her face a few seconds earlier had disappeared, melted into the warm air of this summer ending; and Ty Lee felt her throat tighten. Azula looked down at her hands which she began to twist and scratch. Only then did Ty Lee notice the still-fresh scars she must have inflicted on herself, perhaps the night before. Cuts and abrasions streaked the porcelain skin with bloody trenches. Ty Lee guessed that it couldn't be prettier under the long leather bracelets that covered Azula's forearms. Despite the cheerfulness she affected, something was disturbing her friend, seriously enough for her to feel the need to punish herself. Azula's voice rose, weak and hesitant.
"I thought you would understand."
Ty Lee threw herself on her knees in front of the princess and snatched the hand she was trashing to take it and put it safe in her own. Azula's hand between her palms was still warm from the flames she had ignited earlier.
"No, Azula, don't do that! Forgive me. I… I understand," she lied. "It's just...it's not common. I need a little time to… but that's fine, I'm happy for you, really."
The smile returned to Azula's pale face and Ty Lee thought she could let go of her hands without fear. She remembered her promise: she would be a good friend to the princess and would support her in her decisions, the worst as well as the best. Ty Lee knew very well which category this one belonged to…
"Tell me", she offered reluctantly.
Then, a little more confident, Azula explained to her how, after the unexpected departure of the Avatar and his friends, Zuko had come to join her in her room to find comfort. How the brotherly embraces had gradually turned into more and more scalding caresses. How, one thing leading to another, he had undressed her and kissed her, how she had finally offered herself to him. Although she told this story with tact, Ty Lee had the impression of hearing something obscene, like when she overheard the conversations of the guards when they thought they were safe from prying ears. It was hard to keep pretending when Ty Lee only dreamed of shaking Azula by the shoulders and yelling at her what a heinous crime they had committed her and her brother. But she tried anyway:
"And...did everything go well? Did it hurt you?"
"Zuzu is an experienced and caring lover. Really, I don't understand Mai. What woman would leave a man like him? Oh Ty, I never imagined that we could feel so much pleasure with a man!"
Of course, she had to amplify things. And to mention Mai in passing. Ty Lee had the distinct impression that Azula was testing her limits.
"By the way, it would be better if you slept elsewhere. Zuzu has planned to join me secretly tonight. This could be embarrassing for you! Zuko is kind of… insatiable when it comes to me!" And she emitted a clear laugh which resounded above them and caused the panic of a couple of nightingales which flew away in a rustle of wings.
Ty Lee paled. It would have been difficult for her to describe her dismay. Of course, Azula didn't give her time to think further.
"But enough about me!" the princess said abruptly, pulling Ty Lee out of her stupor. "Tell me everything! What have you learned? Do you know where Zuko was going at night before we left?"
Azula's nostrils almost quivered with excitement and Ty Lee was sure that if Toph was there, she would have told her how her heart had raced. And Ty Lee, who had carefully prepared her story in the previous days, felt all her certainties leaving her, flowing along the porous walls of her mind and turning into a knot that settled in her stomach. She couldn't tell her. Not after Azula's revelations. It would break her heart. Unless she tells her about the little twisted roleplay Zuko imposed on Hachiko? Perhaps Azula, with her equally twisted mind, would see some flattery in this and an additional cause for rejoicing?
But Ty Lee could not resign herself to it. Each time she had practiced telling what she knew, alone in front of her mirror or lying on her mattress, her eyes fixed on the canopy, the words coated her tongue with a dirty taste that gave her nausea. Pronounce them in front of another person seemed impossible. And telling Azula that the man she was in love with was dating a prostitute was a one-way ticket to hell. Now that Azula had regained full control of her bending, who knew how she would react to the news?
"N-nothing…" she replied then, aware of the displeasure and disappointment that appeared on the young princess' face. "I couldn't find anything. I'm sorry Azula. I tried but… I lost track of him in those crowded alleys of the city and I didn't have time to tell you about it before you left."
"I'm sure he's found that filthy traitor on the sly!" Azula spat, suddenly furious.
Ty Lee's heart constricted painfully.
"But who are you talking about?"
"She poisoned me, she's trying to throw me out of the stage! And he keeps to protect her! You know he didn't do anything when he found out she tried to kill me? He just stood there, arms dangling, as he was ready to wipe out the Earth Kingdom single-handedly two days before! This annoying revelation was enough for him to give up on me!"
Yes Ty Lee knew all that. She was the one who had told her about this. But Azula was distorting her story.
"You know it's not just that, Azula", she tried to reason with her. "Officially she's still his wife and the Fire Lady. She's appreciated by the people and the Fire Sages. Zuko can't afford to just hunt down Mai and publicly execute her."
"But that's all she deserves!" the princess squealed wickedly.
As always, thinking about Mai brought a strange feeling to Ty Lee's heart. Although her responsibility for what had happened to Azula was almost indisputable, it was still hard to accept. According to Ty Lee, Mai was a fearsome, resentful, and cunning woman, like Azula. But unlike the princess who wouldn't hesitate to sweep anyone who got in her way with a backhand, Ty Lee was certain that Mai would never have knowingly tried to kill someone. At least not by her own hand. Even when it was necessary to join Azula in Omashu, the young noblewoman had accepted only to distract herself from the mortal boredom in which she lived. Mai refused the tasks that seemed degrading to her, dirty for her body as well as for her soul. She was the first to stand against Azula's murderous rage.
What love makes do, Ty Lee considered, thinking of Zuko's asymmetrical face that made her two best friends' heads spin and transformed them, one into an obsessive hysterical fury, the other into a embittered woman, devoured by jealousy and the desire for revenge. Was a boy really worth it? Ty Lee had known lots of men. Much more than her two friends combined. And never, never had she let any of them turn her into something she wasn't.
"I'm sure he doesn't secretly join Mai Azula", she said, trying to smother the smoldering fire. She was fully aware of the electrically charged air around her. Some of Azula's hair stood up slightly on her scalp, as if a magnet had been hidden in the leaves of the camphor tree. "He wouldn't have gone on vacation with you otherwise, don't you think? Also, I don't believe Mai is still in the Fire Nation. That really wouldn't be very smart of her."
"You might be right", Azula replied, frowning and dropping her shoulders. She still seemed furious, but the gleam of madness that had lodged in her tawny gaze earlier had disappeared. Ty Lee suppressed a sigh of relief.
This reaction was weird. Azula seemed so sure, minutes ago, that she had established her empire in Zuko's heart. Why was she doubting now?
She thought back to Zuko's sullen face in the hall earlier, the embarrassment that had passed through his eyes and to his flushed cheeks when Azula had kissed him close to the mouth in front of Ty Lee and his uncle. And for the first time, she dawned on her that Azula might be lying.
Azula always lie! the little tune hummed in her head. The formula that Zuko and Mai repeated to her as kids, to console her or reassure her after Azula had threatened her or told her scary stories before sleeping...
But why would Azula invent such a huge lie? What horrible truth was she trying to cover up? What could be worse than incest? Ty Lee thought of Aang, Katara, Toph, Sokka and Suki and her stomach twisted. Was their absence a warning?
Be careful Ty… The Avatar and his peasants got in our way and today, they are no longer there. If you don't want to experience the same fate, it's in your best interest to accept.
Ty Lee vowed that no matter what, she would support the princess. It was about her survival. Not for the first time, she told herself that being Azula's enemy was maybe dangerous. But being her friend was a much more perilous exercise.
Zuko stared bewildered at the jewel, unable to take his gaze off it. The pale gold of which it was made danced in front of his amazed eyes and brought in him the memory of those of its owner.
Of all the news Iroh had given him, from the worst to the least catastrophic, Zuko could only think of this latest revelation. This is no doubt what had protected his uncle from his wrath. Zuko now wondered if the old man hadn't intentionally waited until the last moment to brandish the medallion, right after telling him about Azula's trial. He must know how the young man would react to the news. Zuko groaned. His uncle knew him so well. It was absolutely infuriating.
The peril the Sons of Agni represented, the way they used Kojiro, the prospect of Azula's inevitable trial, the unexplained disappearance of those seven high-ranking members of his army, the dead silence that surrounded Mai... All that became secondary the moment his uncle had handed him the small pendant. Zuko had immediately recognized it.
"Why didn't you contact me right away?" he had protested.
"You ordered me to write to you only in cases of extreme urgency. In case the mails are intercepted, so that no one knows you were on vacation! If the Sons of Agni and their crimes are not enough for you, then what about that?"
"We are talking about the woman I have been looking for for over five years now! We are talking about my mother!"
"It's just a pendant she must have lost years ago. There was no urgency in this information."
Sitting on the edge of the dusty bed that had once been Ursa's, Zuko held the necklace over his head and stared at the locket, fascinated by its hypnotic swing.
Its oblique movements reminded him of the pendulum of a clock, and the sense that time was running out crept into his body, carrying with it all the disastrous prospects Iroh had announced to him. Zuko immediately dismissed the unpleasant thought.
He would think about the horrible news Iroh gave him later. He had spent some arduous months. Others, even worse, were to come. They wouldn't take that away from him. They wouldn't take this glimmer of hope. For the first time since that fateful night in Azula's bathroom, Zuko had felt something akin to hope. He had the confused – and probably a little childish – feeling that finding Ursa would put an end to all his problems. Wasn't she the one who erased his worries when he was a little boy? Who consoled and reassured him whenever Father had been harsh with him, or when Azula had mocked his poor firebending skills?
Dropping the jewel back into his palm, he tugged on the hinge and opened the medallion. On each side was a portrait that time had faded and yellowed. Zuko on the left, Azula on the right, both children. Their features were almost unrecognizable to anyone who hadn't known them at the time. The Fire Nation symbol was engraved on the back, along with a hallmark that Zuko recognized as that of the royal family's goldsmith. The same one who had made the crown he now wore on his head, as well as the rings he and Mai had exchanged on their wedding day. And the crown that he himself had placed on Azula's head, more than a year ago, when he had decided to give her his trust.
He had no doubt about the authenticity of the artifact. Zuko had seen it worn around his mother's neck quite often.
Zuko had come to take refuge here, where Azula wouldn't think of coming to get him, in order to contemplate the precious item. By mutual agreement with Iroh, they had decided not to tell the princess a word about it. Not until they had more information. Azula's psyche was still too fragile to bear such news. Her behavior on Ember Island, before and after his friends left, had proven that enough, he thought with a hint of unease. He still needed to think about how he would break the news to his sister. If he did so. Taïma's advice would be invaluable. Zuko would see if he found the time to talk to her about it.
Zuko took his watch out of his pocket. There were still more than twenty minutes before his meeting with Taïma. He had only seen her briefly since their return the day before. He knew it wouldn't be a pleasant conversation, but he was determined to have it.
I can do it with my mouth, if you prefer.
"Don't think about that. Focus on the medallion!"
His voice broke through the silence and he was almost surprised to hear it, not having intended to speak aloud. Was he going crazy like Azula? Had she ended up contaminating him, corrupting him completely, by some spell? He didn't want to think about what had happened that last night on Ember Island, not until it was absolutely necessary.
Azula apparently shared his decision. They hadn't talked about it anymore and Azula affected since their return an artificial joy that never ceased to unseat Zuko. She acted like if she hadn't caressed him to the point of driving him crazy, only to refuse him the second that followed. Like if he hadn't pressed her only to push her away in turn. She was cordial and teasing, as before that fatal stay on Ember Island. Maybe Li and Lo had been right about this island and its mysterious power to reveal the souls of those who went there.
The terrible situation in which he had found his sister in the early morning on the beach had driven away the memory of the night, at least momentarily. Zuko was still shivering thinking about it. He couldn't get over the fear she had inflicted on him when he found the house empty and finally spotted his sister, tossed around by the waves, submerged up to her shoulders, totally panicked and unable to fight against the raging sea. She claimed not to know how she got there but Zuko couldn't help but fear that she had gone in the water intentionally. It wouldn't be the first time Azula showed suicidal tendencies.
The locket still laid in his hand, a little damp from the moisteness of his palms. What would their mother think if she found out about the mess the siblings' relationship had become?
He could already hear Azula's teasing voice in his mind.
"She would be happy to know that we get along so well!" she would say.
He could almost see her walking towards the bed, dressed in her black kimono, which showed her ivory legs, swinging her hips ostensibly to join him.
That night on Ember Island… the caresses, the kisses they had shared, the brief and exhilarating feeling of warmth when he had brushed the inside of her thighs. The way his sister's body had contracted in a spasm of pleasure – or terror – he couldn't tell. And Oh, Agni! Her monstrous proposal...
"Focus!" he chided himself.
Soon he would rest, soon. Taima would agree to help him, no doubt. He wouldn't let his sister invade his mind and control his thoughts any longer. Zuko returned his attention to the jewel.
According to Iroh, June, finally out of prison, had unearthed it on a junk shop stall among some worthless trinkets, somewhere in Chameleon Bay. At the other end of the world.
So Ursa had come this far?
Besides, this pendant might as well have traveled in last years. To be sold and resold. Was it stolen? Had Ursa sold it to support herself? Had it been found on her corpse? Zuko refused to think about that possibility, although it was highly likely.
Ever since he had the medallion in his possession, all of the Fire Lord's thoughts were turned to the Chameleon Bay. There may have been little hope, but it was the only one he had left.
June had left, no one knew where, her pockets filled with a purse full of gold Uncle Iroh had given her as compensation for all her troubles. Zuko had already sent soldiers scouring the taverns of the Capital in search of the bounty hunter. If she was still in town, they were most likely to find her in such a place. Zuko remembered that it was during a stopover at an inn, while she was looking everywhere for Princess Ursa on Nyla's back, that June had been arrested, denounced by brigands with whom she once had a quarrel.
It was only a matter of time before her troubled past caught up with her. And despite Zuko's best efforts to free her, he hadn't been able to get anything from the Earth Kingdom.
June was a notorious criminal and had been arrested on their territory. Calling for her extradition was an act of interference. Zuko had to capitulate. Besides, he gave up when he learned that the shirshu had died some time after his mistress arrest. The ugly hairy monster had let himself die in the enclosures of King Kuei's menagerie, taking with him all of Zuko's hopes.
This news had terribly frustrated the young sovereign, but he himself had to admit that it made no sense to risk an open conflict with the Earth Kingdom for a stupid animal. Especially with Lu Fang plotting night and day to get the head of the Fire Nation princess; and this in spite of the ratified treaty with the Earth King, the one that was supposed to serve as compensation for Azula's crimes in Ba Sing Se.
The Earth Kingdom...
The sending of new considerable sums to respect the treaty signed years before, had not changed anything. No more than the non-aggression pact proposal sent by Zuko before his departure to Ember Island.
No answer came from Ba Sing Se, no news. Lu Fang's letters- but was it really him?- continued to rain down, Iroh said, day after day. Always the same words, the same handwriting, on the same paper, placed on Zuko's pillow by an anonymous hand.
When he arrived, Iroh had handed him a small bundle of these letters, without a word, and Zuko, a little ashamed, remembering his promise, revealed to him that he had been receiving them for a long time already.
Zuko was tired of running after shadows. He seethed with rage thinking of all his advisers, ministers, and even his uncle, not to mention the Sages who stood in the way when he should have declared war on Lu Fang and Kuei.
But they didn't expand on the subject and talked about what happened on Ember Island with Aang.
It had been a painful moment, Zuko remembered. His uncle didn't seem convinced when he described the scene that had taken place on the beach, distorted by Azula's lies. Zuko's responsibility was largely watered down when Aang's was a little exaggerated. Azula's seemed overwhelming. But oddly enough, Iroh had seemed more willing to believe it. The letter must have helped. Following Azula's prayer, his uncle hadn't mentioned it to Zuko.
Zuko had qualms about hiding the truth from his uncle. Listening to his sister's advice had been easy as long as it met the expectations of his uncle, his friends and the Four Nations Council.
The ideas she was now whispering in his ear were very different. Yet it was almost impossible to remain deaf to them. Maybe it had something to do with her playful hands wandering over his chest and neck when she spoke to him. Why did she always have to touch him? Zuko noticed that his mind had once again wandered to Azula. Was she a witch to have such power over his mind?
Frothing with rage and self-loathing, Zuko got to his feet, pacing up and down the room that had once been his mother's sanctuary. It was there that she would spend hours with her attendants reading novels to escape from her new reality. The more time passed, the more Zuko became aware of what Ursa's life must have been like, forced to marry an undoubtedly violent and abusive man who had only choose her to take advantage of her genetic heritage. Zuko sometimes wondered if his mother was forced when he and Azula had been conceived and the thought made him sick.
Zuko glanced at his watch again. Five more minutes! He slipped the jewel into his pocket and headed for the door to go to the small living room where he was to meet Taima. His heart pounded in his chest as he approached the small office where he had arranged to meet her. The last time they had had such a meeting, Zuko had become angry and had threatened her with reprisals if she dared to allude to this insanity about his relationship with Azula one again.
Today, he was about to tell her what had happened on Ember Island. Of what he had done, he corrected himself, feeling guilt gripping his stomach.
He opened the door to the small living room plunged into darkness. Without bothering to open the curtains, he flicked a golden streamer out of his palm and rippled toward the hearth. He wanted to spare himself the shame of blushing in her presence. What he was about to confess was damning enough. As everything was ready, Zuko sat down in the largest chair around the coffee table and waited.
A smell of dampness and corpses filled the sparsely furnished room. A lingering odor of old earth and rot tainted the nostrils of Lu Fang and those of his guest, who wrinkled her nose in disgust.
This was one of the disadvantages of living underground. When you dig a tunnel network of several hundred miles, with no other tool at your disposal than a regiment of unequally talented earthbenders, it's not wonder you sometimes have to face unpleasant surprises.
Lu Fang must have summoned the foreman to complain about the foul smells seeping from the rammed earth walls in all the rooms of these new quarters where they had been staying for three days. The man had apologized, explaining that the bivouac area had been built on the site of a gigantic cemetery, probably an old battlefield that the peasants who lived above still probably use to bury their dead.
"I thought Fire Nation citizens used to cremate their dead?" Lu Fang wondered.
"Forgive me, your Highness, but it seem that people here have different mores. We came across a still-fresh corpse this morning while adding a gallery for the latest arrivals. It fell on us like a stone when we wanted to create a pathway for ventilation. We had to bring it to the surface"
Like the workers who dug them, these temporary underground camps, which they had pompously baptized "resting zones", were of unequal quality. These were far from offering the luxury that Lu Fang had known in the previous quarters.
They might not be pleasant, but they would have to settle with them. The next bivouac area was more than two days away and the men needed a rest. So need his prisoner, although she hardly complained about it.
This halt was the penultimate before the headquarters where the high-ranking officers of his army resided. The haughty-looking woman in front of him didn't know it yet, but it was over there, in the dungeons dug several feets underground that her family was held: her mother, her father, and of course her younger brother who was probably still crying the loss of his little fingers.
Lu Fang couldn't help but admiring the composure, the resilience and the courage of this princely and delicate girl who endured the darkness, the humidity and the long walks underground without a flinch. She hardly complained despite the handcuffs that held her wrists and prevented her from ensuring her balance on the stony and uneven ground that sometimes made her stumble. Lu Fang suspected her of containing herself so as not to give him the pleasure of seeing the true extent of her despair and frustration. Lu Fang wanted to spare her. Exhausted and dejected, she would be of no help to him. She had to keep this combativeness that made her so redoubtable and important.
She hadn't said a word since he had summoned her to this cavity, darker and smellier than all the other "rooms" that made up this resting zone.
Opposing him this wall of indifference and contempt was apparently the Fire Lady's main source of pleasure and distraction since their talk in the dungeons of "Area 2". Lu Fang tried to be understanding: when you present your enemy her brother's severed little fingers to force her to cooperate, this kind of reluctance is to be expected.
Luckily, Lu Fang had some interesting news for her and he was sure to make her react.
"I received a letter this morning from the Headquarters towards which we are heading and which are five days of walking from here. Your little brother says hello to you and is longing for you. He asks every day when you're coming to rescue him and your parents."
A demented hatred lit up the hitherto inscrutable gaze of the Fire Lady.
"How dare you?" she growled. "You son of a..."
"Believe it, Madame", he cut her off. "I know that a horrible reputation precedes me but I'm not such a cruel man. I don't like hurting innocent people, let alone children. I'll be just as relieved as you when your younger brother finds himself out of this sordid business..."
"Don't pretend with me Lu Fang. From my brother's fingers to the hideous bedspread with which you covered my mattress, passing through the dubious decoration of these premises, I can see that you did not shrink from any form of torture." She said, pointing her chin to the wall in front of her, from which one could see a greyish, protruding and half-decomposed hand. Its curled fingers seemed to be waving to them.
Lu Fang smirked. This profane was definitely not lacking in nerve or humor. Under other circumstances, he was sure he might have enjoyed her company. Unfortunately, he didn't have time for pleasantries, as subtle as they are. Eavesdroppers could always hang around, and he absolutely wanted to keep this conversation private. That's why he'd taken refuge here, in this gloomy cavity roughly furnished with two worm-eaten wooden chairs and a flat rock on which were two glasses and a carafe of stagnant water in a cracked clay pot.
"I appreciate your frankness and your sense of apropos, Madam. However, I am here to offer you a deal."
"Let me guess", she replied laconically, raising her two gray eyes full of magnificent disdain. "You want me to help you overthrow my husband. In exchange, maybe you'll let me sleep in a decent bed that isn't already the home of a cockroaches family?"
He smiled again at the young woman and continued:
"If the plan I propose to you were to work, if you agree to collaborate with me, not only will you find comfort worthy of your rank, but Tom-Tom will find freedom. He will become more powerful than you could ever dream of. I can make him a prominent member of a powerful bloodline. If only you accepted…"
Mai suddenly burst into laughter. A laughter deprived of joy.
"What are you thinking of? Install my brother on the throne of fire? Let's be serious! He's not even a bender!"
"He's not, but his nephew could be… That would entitle Tom-Tom to certain advantages."
"His nephew? What nonsense are you still talking about? I'm not pregnant!"
"Of course you're not. We both know that. And it's no wonder with such a husband. Especially if his desires bring him elsewhere. The truth doesn't matter, as long as he doesn't know. If Zuko learns that I'm holding his beloved wife, he will be more willing to listen to the discontent and tensions that are rising and swelling all over the world, including within his own kingdom. Don't you agree?"
Mai burst out again in her laugh full of bitterness.
"If you think that coward will lift a finger for me… He's already made up his mind. He prefers to protect her. At least she's a firebender and a pretty good one. As we are speaking, everyone must believe that I was the one who ordered this murder attempt. Zuko already must have ordered that my head be cut off the moment I will be found."
At that moment, Lu Fang felt something strange, like a jolt near his heart. He had experienced that before, a long time ago. He realized that he felt pity for this indomitable girl that nothing seemed to move. It was weird. It was an emotion he hadn't felt for years and it was unpleasant.
The Fire Lady had played a dangerous game. The idea of depriving the princess of her medication - and thus of her sanity, hoping that would induce her brother to get rid of her - was not lacking in audacity and creativity. He was willing to acknowledge that to her. And it had worked beyond all her expectations!
Though the poor girl ignored that her most trusted spy had served more than one master.
By this time, if no one had found out, the arsenic that Wu was quietly adding to the new formula ordered by Mai, must have already destroyed half of the princess's organs. Not to mention the doses contained in her cosmetics and in her wine. It was almost a miracle that she wasn't already buried six feet under.
Eventually, her imprisonment and fall had saved her from a slow and painful death. Everything suggested that the poison had been detected and removed from her body. Wu's latest reports pointed to daily improvement in her health.
Once again, Lu Fang was invaded by this wave of frustration which always accompanied the memory of this failed kidnapping. He had so often imagined Zuko's face when he would find out he was holding his precious princess. Lu Fang liked to fall asleep figuring the expression on Zuko's monstrous face when he would slit his sister's pretty, maddeningly white throat right before his eyes! And when he would have given him back her magnificent body soiled and dishonored by his men.
The young woman in front of him hadn't foreseen all this. In wanting to execute her personal revenge, she had provided Lu Fang with the best possible weapon. What a disappointment that Wu screwed up!
Lu Fang soothed his frustration by thinking of the anguish Zuko must feel thanks to the anonymous letters that Wu placed on his pillow almost daily. A paranoid king is both more dangerous and easier to control, he told himself. By doing so, Lu Fang was keeping the fire going. Wu could take the blows! But no matter, it was a risk Lu Fang was willing to take. Other Dai Li agents would come to complete the task he had given him. Wu was the best but he was not irreplaceable. If the Fire Lady were to accept his proposal, he wouldn't have to regret his best agent.
"It's true," he said slowly, "that the princess has assets that one might envy. But you have a considerable advantage over her: that of being able to carry the Fire Lord's son."
Mai snorted in disdain.
"Who tells us he hasn't already impregnated her? She's so good at everything. I'm sure she'll make some wonderful little firebenders for him as soon as she recovers from her injuries."
"Come on, my dear, you know like me that incest is forbidden in your Nation, even among royalty. It is a divine law. A bastard born of this unnatural union would only be a source of embarrassment for your husband and he could never legitimize it."
Mai was frowning so much that her slanted eyes were reduced to two arcs in her narrow face. Lu Fang could almost imagine the cogs turning in her mind.
"What do you expect from such a lie?" she said eventually. "When Zuko realizes that it's just a trap, that I'm not carrying his heir..."
"Time, my dear. I hope to gain time..."
"And what will that bring to me?"
"It will give you back your family and your husband. And at the same time you'll get rid of the one that made him lose his mind. We will both be gainers."
"Are you seriously trying to make me believe that you'll spare Zuko if you succeed in your coup?" she asked in her monotonous voice.
"Who spoke of a coup? You can rather see it as an accelerated transfer of power between the Fire Lord and his heir. The rule of the Fire Lord is an ancient tradition, and I doubt your fellow citizens are ready for such immediate regime change. Even less if we put a non-bender on the throne. The success of the Sons of Agni proves your people's devotion to the power of Fire and to the pure race. They will hardly welcome a leader who doesn't possess this gift. But I'm sure they'll accept their current Fire Lady, especially if she carries within her the hope of a renewal. You have the charisma I'm looking for and more legitimacy than we can hope for!"
Lu Fang kept the true substance of his thought to himself. It is easier to manipulate a weakened legitimate leader than to impose on an entire people a sovereign in whom they don't recognize themselves. It would be very easy for Lu Fang to make Zuko's alleged child his puppet.
Mai thought for a moment and said:
"Why don't you turn to Ozai? If you were able to free Azula from prison so easily, what's stopping you from using him? He's still young enough to have other heirs after all."
Lu Fang bit his cheek to suppress a smile. Was he dreaming or was the Fire Lady making him suggestions to overthrow Zuko?
"No",Lu Fang said, making a gesture with his hand as if to sweep away this idea he had already thought of many times. "In the minds of other Nations, Ozai embodies only destruction and the thirst for power. While you are a notorious friend of the Avatar!"
He preferred to ignore Mai's skeptical raised eyebrows at this assertion. "You represent a new order, temperance and the desire for a strong nation without expansionist ambition. Your people will trust you. As the antagonist of the princess, you further represent morality and order in a nation corrupted by vice and perversion."
Lu Fang felt he was taking a risk. Nothing Wu had told allowed him to assert that Mai was drawn to power. Was it possible she had embraced the pretentious title of Fire Lady only out of love? He held back a grimace of disgust at the very thought.
How could such a woman love such a repulsive man? Whether it was his horrible scar that disfigured him, or his weakness or his unnatural lust, everything about this parody of a man disgusted him.
Yet the Fire Lady's hesitation only affirmed this absurd inclination. Even when Lu Fang had brought her the proof of his determination in the form of two little fingers wrapped in a bloody rag. Could it be that she was ready to relinquish power in the hope of running away with this failure she called a husband and leading the unworthy life of a peasant? Clearly, she loved Zuko and nothing he could do would convince her to help him put that fool in the dust. Fortunately, he had a plan for it.
"What are you planning to do to Zuko? What will you ask of him in exchange for his heir?"
Here we are, hethought, suppressing a smirk.
"We will demand that he abdicate in favor of his wife. You will become the Grand Regent of the Fire Nation, until your son is old enough to sit on the Throne of Fire. We will then begin a long cooperation marked by trust and friendship between our two nations. No more wars, no more tensions: the Avatar himself will have nothing to complain about. According to my sources, his relationship with the Fire Lord has been rather… complicate lately."
"What will happen to him? I mean Zuko? How can you be sure he won't try to take back what's his?"
"We'll make sure he's lost all support as a Fire Lord and have him imprisoned. But don't worry", he hastened to add seeing a worried gleam appear in the Fire Lady's gray eyes. "He will be treated very well, I will personally order that no harm be done to him. I was thinking of a golden prison where you can visit him as it pleases you. He will see his son grow up, under good supervision, of course, and conjugal visits may be considered", he finished with a knowing smile to which she did not respond, her narrow face remaining marble.
"Think about it, My Lady, you can't hope for a better offer. Your husband can no longer rule the Fire Nation, not with his warlike temper, not after he has fallen so low in abjection and crime. A king who indulge in vice and lust with a member of his own family cannot be a model for his people."
There was a long silence.
"If I agree to help you, will you let me see my family?"
Lu Fang was grateful that it was too dark for the young woman to see the smile full of fierce satisfaction that stretched his square jaw.
"I think it would be very easy for me to organize a visit. Under strict supervision of course. Tom-Tom will be so happy to see his big sister again. He only talks about you, convinced that you will come and free him any day now. You will have the privilege of telling him the good news."
Mai didn't answer right away and nothing in her face betrayed the slightest emotion.
"And Zuko", she finally asked. "How do you guarantee me that he won't want me killed the moment he sees me again? He'll always think I tried to kill his crazy sister. Maybe I should have done it when I had the chance", she muttered, seemingly more to herself. "At least I would have had that pleasure."
Lu Fang's smile widened.
"That's my business. Trust me. I think we can entrust our mutual friend with one last mission. He's just waiting for an opportunity to redeem himself for his mistakes. Let's you and me give him this chance. »
Mai plunged her gray eyes into his and he thought he saw a light shining there. Lu Fang felt pleased. It seemed obvious to him that the Fire Lady was not the kind of woman who could bear the humiliation of having been duped.
"And the child? What will we do when it becomes clear that I'm not pregnant?"
"Orphans are not lacking in the Fire Nation. Especially among refugees. You wouldn't be the first queen to fake a pregnancy to ensure lineage continuity. While waiting for the ''deliverance'', we will take care of keeping you at a distance from your husband so that he doesn't know anything about it."
Something flashed in the young woman's silver eyes and the earthbender in him knew he had struck a chord. Mai's heart had suddenly raced, with the same abruptness as when one is told incredible news, and that hope clings to this promise, like the drowned man to the stump that will save him from a certain death. .
"What about Azula?"
"Soon, the Princess will be just a bad memory for you. You can trust me. I think it's in both of our interests."
Mai didn't even have to answer that. Why bother to break open doors?
"And when we get rid of her and you install me on the throne, what will happen? Why would I trust you? Don't tell me you intend to leave wisely and withdraw all your troops? I find it hard to believe that you act selflessly and did all of this just to get revenge on Azula. If it was just that, you'd kill me too. You know perfectly well that I helped her bring down Ba Sing Se."
"This is in the past. You have amply demonstrated your loyalty since then. I'll make sure His Majesty is aware about your involvement. The Earth Kingdom will be your ally. Of course", he added "I hope I can count on your help in return. You know the princess better than anyone. As you so aptly put it, you were at her side during the coup of Ba Sing Se. You know how her mind works. Thanks to you, we will always be one step ahead of her and we will be stronger to bring her down."
May remained silent. Lu Fang could see that she was thinking hard.
"Think about it, My Lady. You will be adored by your own people and mine. They will all see you as the benefactress who saved them from another war. I only demand one thing from you in return. I want you to ensure that the Fire Nation permanently leaves the colonies and restores integrity to the Earth Kingdom. The time of oppression has lasted too long. I don't care about the throne of Fire. Kuei neither. Your people will never accept an earthbender as their leader, the king is well aware of that. All His Majesty wants is to avoid an unnecessary war. Once allied, we will help you to rid the Capital of the fanatics that are plaguing it. The future of your nation is in your hands, Madam."
New silence. Only interrupted by the sound of a cage being opened in the distance and the drops trickling from the ceiling into a lump of packed, damp earth.
The Fire Lady didn't need to know the true extent of his plans. She didn't need to know that Kuei had secretly sent his best agents to find Lu Fang and bring him back to the palace. Not yet. He had time. Kuei was far too coward to publicly confess the betrayal of his minister of war. And even if he decided to do so, Lu Fang was not worried. Everywhere, his Dai Li agents made sure that the mail emanating from Ba Sing Se did not reach the Caldera and vice versa: Wu marvelously took care of this mission. Mai would be more willing to help if she thought she was collaborating with Kuei, known for his measured and compassionate temperament. It was far too obvious that she didn't trust Lu Fang.
And the moment he was considering this idea, as true as it was unpleasant, the slightly hoarse voice of the Fire Lady rose in the darkness:
"When can I see my brother?"
And Lu Fang knew he had won.
Taïma waited a bit before speaking. She knew enough about psyche and human emotions to know that you have to carefully weigh your words after a revelation like the one Zuko had just made to her.
Opposite her, seated in his armchair, the young king watched for her reaction. Deep angst drowned his gaze and Taima guessed that if he was holding his hands so tightly together, it was only to keep his fingers from shaking and not to lacerate his skin with his finger nails. Yet the gesture evoked Azula so much in the healer's mind, that she felt her throat go dry.
"You don't say anything", Zuko remarked in a weak voice that shook with anguish and guilt. "You must have an opinion on the matter, right? Any advice, I don't know? A comment, something!"
"Zuko..."
The poor boy looked so desperate. Barely out of adolescence, and already so many troubles agitating his young soul. Taïma wasn't sure she had ever met beings as tormented and with such complex personalities as Zuko and Azula.
Add to that all the clichés of a dysfunctional family, and look at the result, she thought wryly.
Incest… Finally, Zuko had dared to utter the forbidden word.
"But speak, at last!" Zuko roared abruptly as he rose from his chair, which threatened to tip over before falling back to its feet. "I have just confessed a secret that could ruin my life and you remain there, silent, staring at me with a penetrating gaze as if you had understood everything but that you were waiting for me to discover the solution to my problem on my own! Say you're disgusted, that we're degenerate and depraved monsters, I don't know!"
"Zuko, please calm down. You won't gain anything by getting angry."
"You're the one who makes me angry! I come to ask you for help and you just stand there with your infuriating patience and placidity. If I confided in you, it's not for nothing. You're supposed to know what it's like to be abnormal!"
Taima easily seized the allusion. She answered coldly, struggling not to lose her calm:
"I don't see things that way… I don't think our situations are comparable… I love women, it's true. I know it's not socially accepted. But I've never fallen in love with someone in my family..."
Zuko glared at her from his full height. Taïma wondered for a moment if he was going to hit her, or worse, burn her. She got ready, just in case...
But it wasn't necessary. Zuko let his shoulders slump, looked away, and sat down heavily in his chair.
Taïma put down on the small pedestal table next to her the cup of cold tea that she hadn't managed to raise to her lips after Zuko had told her in detail what he and his sister had done in Ember Island.
Zuko had told her everything: the caresses, the kisses, the interrupted lovemaking, when Azula had started to utter insane words.
Taïma decided to leave the basic problem for later. Zuko didn't need her to know that everything that happened with Azula was wrong, terribly wrong, and that should never happen again. So she decided to raise the other issue.
"Have you thought about the meaning of the words you just told me? The ones Azula told you when you were about to… to have sex with her."
She hadn't thought it would be that hard to say. She felt a sharp heat reach her cheeks and was relieved the dark color of her skin allowed her to conceal her embarrassment more easily.
Zuko buried his face in his hands and for a moment Taima thought he was crying. But his eyes were dry when he looked up at her again.
"I thought of something...but...no, that's not possible, is it?"
"What's it, Zuko?"
The young sovereign seemed to hesitate. She read in his distraught gaze the same distress she had felt when she discovered that Azula was no longer a virgin after having examined her. She was sure there was the same horrible idea running through Zuko's mind. Was he going to say it? Was he going to state the presumptions she had forbidden herself to tell to anyone?
"No. Nothing. It's an absurd idea. I can't believe it", he said, shaking his head and leaning back in his chair.
"Zuko", she began, "I think it's essential to…"
"I didn't come for that!" he cut her off sharply. "I shouldn't have told you about it. That's not the real problem. Azula is crazy: she says crazy things, doesn't it make sense?"
Obviously, Zuko was not ready to hear this truth. Taima didn't know if it was due to fear or to the prospect of discovering what torment his little sister had been forced to endure, to guilt for not having been there to protect her, or – and this was more worrying of all – jealousy.
She considered insisting once more but the thought, always the same, fell on her like a heavy curtain preventing her from entering the stage. Taima hoped that one day she would have the courage to raise the curtain and address the audience hidden behind, to tell them what she knew, what she had guessed. But that was definitely not her role. Zuko's family was complicated enough as it was, no need to add this drama. She doubted that the Fire Lord was currently in a psychological state strong enough to bear the weight of such a heavy secret.
What if he blamed Azula for what had happened? What maybe hadhappened, she corrected herself.
It was a possibility, wasn't it? Azula's flirtatious attitude probably wasn't working in her favor. If she was willing to shamelessly seduce her own brother, why wouldn't she also...
These are just assumptions! You have no right to talk about it, she berated herself inwardly.
"Very well Zuko. I'm listening, what do you want to tell me? What are you expecting from me?"
Zuko didn't answer immediately. He got up, went to the window and pulled the curtain. A dazzling light engulfed the small living room which had remained immersed in darkness throughout their meeting. Once the unpleasant sensation had passed, Taïma felt relieved to see the sun again. It was still a hot afternoon and when Zuko opened the window, the tireless song of the cicadas invaded the room. One would have said that it emanated from the walls of the living room as the stridulations were heady.
September was already well under way. Would this summer never end?
Zuko was gazing at the landscape in the distance through the window and he did not turn to speak:
"I need your help," he announced miserably. "I need you to help me. It has to stop…"
The Fire Lord turned sharply to her and locked his shining eyes with hers.
"Zuko", she tried softly, "It's not…"
But he didn't let her speak. A fierce determination lit up his eyes. He approached the chair where she was sitting on and knelt in front of her. What a strange sight it was to see this king throwing himself at her feet as one bows before a queen. All of a sudden he threw himself on all fours on the floor, his fingers digging compulsively into the short hair of the carpet at their feet.
"I'm constantly thinking of her!" he exploded. "I can't focus on anything else. As soon as I close my eyes, she's there… I see her lips everywhere, her eyes, her skin, her hair… I imagine her naked, I dream that I touch her, that I find her in the secret rooms of the palace. What did she do to me, Taïma? Looks like she cast a spell on me, or I don't know…Four months ago, our relationship was perfect! I was only... only her brother!"
It would have been awkward to tell Zuko now that the relationship he shared with Azula had never been healthy, or even normal, even less perfect. It was like that since she knew them. The tears that flowed from Zuko's eyes and crashed in large drops on the carpet did not escape Taima. She was shocked nonetheless when he looked up at her and she caught a glimpse of his face ravaged by shame and grief.
"I can't stand it any longer! Please help me! I don't want to be that man anymore. I'm disgusted of myself! I want you to help me heal from her. I want to heal from Azula."
Taïma's heart sank. For the first time of old, she thought of her mother's words, years before, when she had confessed to her, during a dark and windy night, that she didn't feel any kind of attraction for boys.
It doesn't matter. We'll heal you, my daughter. The shaman has solutions for that!
It had been years since Taima had spoken to her father and her mother. Only two of her sisters still agreed to speak to her. She sometimes wondered how they were doing, far, far in the North.
Faced with this inconsolable despair, Taïma made a decision that was unlike her. Honesty was one of her core values. But for once, she would make an exception: she would make a promise she knew she could never keep.
"Okay Zuko. I will help you. You can count on me. I'll heal you."
I hope that you liked this chapter ! The political plot will become more complex in the next chapters, which may explain the longer delays because I have a lot of work to make sure that I am going in the right direction and that I don't contradict myself. Not everyone can write The Song of Ice and Fire!
Don't hesitate to let a review to keep up my motivation which has been more fluctuating lately!
Oh also : "Black Sun" celebrated its first birthday in May (at least the French version). 30 chapters in one year, I think it's a good pace!