Tiffany curled her body up in her bed. The bed she used to share with Taeyeon. She sighed and another tear drop fell off from her eye for the nth time that night while looking at the test result infront of her eyes. She shifted to rest on her back and put her right arm over her eyes, and let out another sigh.
The sadness and thoughts of Taeyeon kept her restless for months. Even though she knew she should rest enough for herself and her baby. Her body turned to face Taeyeon's side of the bed and reached her hand out for the empty space, running her hand over the silky sheets, having thoughts of Taeyeon drowning her sanity slowly and surely.
"We're having a baby girl.." A quivered whisper broke the silent room. Tiffany moved her other hand to touch her visible baby bump, caressing it as she closed her eyes, silently praying that it was Taeyeon who gently caressed her stomach
"Just like what you wanted, Tae.. A baby girl..."
"..so please come home.. and help me name our daughter" More tear drops wetted Tiffany's already soaked pillow. She weakly pulled Taeyeon's pillow closer to her chest, trying to catch a whiff of Taeyeon's scent. Even though only traces of memories were left there
"Taeyeon, please.. I'm begging you.. please.. please come back home"
She closed her eyes and burried herself under her tears, hoping to atleast she could get some rest she needed.
Just when she almost cry herself to sleep, the sound of the bedroom door being opened alarmed her. She turned her back to face the door and shocked for a beat when she saw the face that appeared in the doorway
"Mommy ?"
"Irene-ah.. what's wrong ?" Tiffany immediately wiped her tears stains on her face and forced a smile. She felt too hopeless that she really thought her daughter was Taeyeon. She couldn't deny how much she missed and needed Taeyeon.
The little girl silently closed the door, followed by the pair of black and white puppies. She walked to the side of the bed, helped the puppies to get on the bed before she jumped on the bed. She gently moved her body to her mom's welcoming arms, snuggling closely.
"I had a bad dream. Can I sleep here, mommy ?"
"Ofcourse you can, baby.. now sleep. It's late" A smile appeared on Tiffany's face when she felt small nods from the child inside her hug. Tiffany ran her hand along Irene's long hair, caressing the back of her head lovingly as she pulled her body closer
"Mommy ?" The little girl looked up at Tiffany with her pair of bright eyes that always reminds her of her daughter's father
'Look at her, Tae. She really looks like you'
"Yes ?" Tiffany replied softly after she gulped down her unsaid words for Taeyeon
"I really miss daddy" She said in above whisper while burrying her face to Tiffany's chest even more. Her voice was filled with tears. And it broke Tiffany's heart even more
'Can you hear what she said ? Your daughter misses you, Tae. It's not just me. Please come home'
Silence filled the warm room before sobs broke it. Tiffany felt another hot tears spilled out of her eyes. She sighed inaudibly and caressed her daughter's head again
"Who doesn't, sweetheart.. We all do. Let's just pray so that daddy can come home safely, okay ?"
-xxx-
Beautiful scent of eggs and pancakes woke Tiffany up gently. She opened her eyes to the empty bed, only herself and her human-sized teddy bear. Her head felt heavy because of the lack of sleep. The bed felt particularly comfortable and warm that morning, so she decided to sleep some more, until-
'Wait, what ?! Someone is cooking ?! Irene can't cook !'
Her eyes shot open and she quickly jumped off the bed. She was terrified something would happen to her daughter.
'Or Taeyeon is finally home ?' She quicken her footsteps but still carefully when she walk down the stairs.
'Please, please please please let it be Taeyeon'
Her footsteps stopped when she stepped inside the kitchen. Irene was just playing with the puppies on the floor, and there is another person who was cooking. Every eyes locked to Tiffany instantly
"Tiffany noona. Good morning" The tall young man greeted with a small smile before continuing to arrange the food on the plate
"Oh, Cheolwoo. Good morning. What are you doing here ?" The man still had a smile despite of sensing a little hint of bitterness in Tiffany's tone
"I just wanted to pay you a visit. But you were still asleep and Irene said she was hungry, so—"
"Is it done, uncle ?"
"Yeah. Here you go.." With the same sweet smile, he carefully handed the plate to the little girl
"Thank you, uncle" She politely said and walked to go to the living room
"Don't forget to wash your hands first, honey"
"Ofcourse, mommy" A silence filled the warm kitchen after Irene left. Tiffany awkwardly cleared her throat and walked to the kitchen counter to grab her cup
"Would you like to drink something ?"
"No, thank you. I'm good" Tiffany nodded at his answer and made herself her usual hot tea. After she was done, she gestured politely to let Cheolwoo sit on one of the wooden chair in the dining table. Tiffany herself walked to Taeyeon's usual chair. She gently put her steamy cup down an sat down carefully
"So.. how are you doing ?" Cheolwoo said softly while locking her gaze to Tiffany's eyes
"I'm fine. How about you ?"
"I'm fine, too"
They fell into another awkward silence. Only hums of Irene's favorite TV cartoon could be heard. Tiffany reached out for the steamy cup, took a sip of her tea before putting it back down again. Tiffany could only look at the steam that puffed out of the cup while the man infront of her awkwardly fixed his already neat necktie and suit
"I broke up with her, noona. My girlf- ex girlfriend" Tiffany bit her lower lip and looked up to meet his pleading eyes. And she knew right then where it will lead them to
"Oh.. I'm sorry-"
"Just like you told me to.. I tried, noona. I really tried. But I can't love anyone else but you" He said softly
"We've talked about this. Let's not start this again"
"Tiffany noona, please.. Please give me a chance"
"Why don't you just get it ?! I can't !"
"Is it because I'm younger than you ? Age doesn't matter to me-"
"I told you it's not because of that"
"Noona, I can be any kind of man you want. And I have a company, noona. I can give you whatever you need or want"
"I told you it's not because of that too ! I'm a married woman, Cheolwoo. I'm belong to someone. I'm Taeyeon's. And I love her.." Tiffany raised her hands, pointing at the white gold that circled her ring finger
"..You just don't get it. It's not just about money" Unintentionally showing her annoyance, she threw her hands up and crossed them infront of her chest
"But she's not even here. She always leaves you. Please give me a chance, I love you. I swear I'll never leave you alone. I would even love Irene and the baby you're carrying like they're my own child !"
"Taeyeon will come home soon ! She'll come home.. she promised me"
"Yeah ? Well, try to save yourself and be realistic, noona. The ambush was big. Almost 200 soldiers, almost all of them are dead.. She could-" The guy in suit stopped his mouth from going further as he saw the frown that appeared on the woman's angry face
"..It's almost 5 months and she's not even here. Why would you still trusting someone who can't keep their promisses ? You need someone to take care of you. And I would. I love you, noona ! I can give you my love, attention, money- whatever you want. What does she have that I don't ? All she ever did was made you carry her baby and leave you all alone. How is that-"
"Stop it ! Just stop !" Tiffany hissed while keeping her volume down, didn't want her daughter to hear any of their voices
"Noona, ple—"
"Stop it ! You don't have any rights to talk that way about Taeyeon. I've heard enough. Leave" She angrily pointed her finger on the man that was filled with guilt before pointing at the front door
"I love you, noona. Please let me—" Tears started to streamed down Tiffany's face as she had her hands covering her ears and shook her head. She didn't want to hear any of his words anymore. Heck, she had even started to hate his presence
"I said leave. Leave. Now"
She didn't even want to see him when he rose from the seat and walked out from the house. Tiffany wasn't sure how long she had her ears covered and tears streaming down her face. Taeyeon ever left her side for over a year before. But she came back home. How about this time ? Tiffany didn't know whether she was denying the truth or she was stuck to Taeyeon's words of promisses.
Her body jerked in surprise when she felt a warm lick on her foot. She looked down and she saw a pair of white maltese and black poodle looking up at her with their cute round eyes. A smile cracked on her face after she gazed at the puppies for a few seconds. The way they wagged their tails and the way they looked at her could lighten her mood instantly. Still with a smile, she bent down and reached to caress their heads
"Are you guys hungry ?" The puppies just stayed still and wagged their tails
"You cuties" Tiffany stiffled a giggle and rose to get their dogfood
-xxx-
'We're positive that we didn't find Sergeant Major Kim's body. The explosions were huge and deathly. We're sorry to inform this but we're sure that hundreds of bodies were gone due to the explosions, along with Sergeant Major's—we suppose. We only found her necklace and her name badge we've sent you a month ago.. We will surely contact you again if we got new reports. We are sorry once again'
It was late in the night, where Irene was already asleep and thoughts of Taeyeon were leaving Tiffany awake. Staying up late crying had grown on her, it doesn't cause fear anymore. Call her faithless, but that night too, she also started to doubt that Taeyeon could keep her promisses.
She had Taeyeon's military necklace's chain wrapped around her knuckle and the badge inside her fist. She put her knuckle close to her churning chest as another tear drop wetted her cheek even more.
'Where are you, Taeyeon ? Are you still holding onto your own words ? Because I still am'
She let the TV on to make the living room less lonely. But she still slept in a loneliness, curled up in the sofa and wrapped under the tears.
The movements inside Tiffany's stomach woke her up, followed by an immense sickness and twisting pain. She quickly sat up and rested her back against the sofa. Her eyes were shut close as she hissed at the pain
'I'll take care of you for sure. I'll never let you out of my sight. I'll protect you, I won't let anything hurt you..'
Where are you, Tae ? I'm hurting.. Please hold me..
Tear drops streamed down her tear-stained face. Her hand gripped on the sofa's cushion and the other one placed on the baby bump, silently dismissing the pain away. The pain reached its peak before it suddenly went away. Tiffany opened her eyes to the blurred wooden ceiling. Heavy breaths filled the living room, cold sweats drenched her body. She closed her eyes for some moments and let out a relieved sigh. She was safe. Atleast for that time, she thought.
"Be gentle with mommy, baby girl. I'm only with myself" Tiffany whispered as she caressed her stomach in a circular motion.
She smiled when she looked at the baby picture of one-day-old Irene in the photo album she placed on the coffee table. She remembered about the time where she had to go through full long months of pregnancy alone when Taeyeon was away. She had to go to the check ups alone, getting weird kind of foods alone because of her cravings, and even called the hospital by herself when she was about to give birth. She was confident she could go through all that alone. Until she fell off the stairs, it took her courage away, along with her baby.
Another sigh slipped out of Tiffany's lips when she saw a picture beside. Picture of Taeyeon with sleeping one month old Irene on her hold. The younger Taeyeon had her brightest smile on her face, and her eyes screamed love for her child. And that was one the reasons of Tiffany's love for photographs.
She kept their love in a photograph. With Taeyeon, they could make memories for themselves. Where their eyes will never close, hearts will never be broken, time will frozen still, and
She won't be alone while she waits Taeyeon to come home.
But that time, will there be any difference ? Will Tiffany still have a chance to see Taeyeon holding her baby ? Will Taeyeon still got a chance to find her way home ? Her home where Tiffany and their daughter were waiting for her. And not the one where she would meet God.
Tiffany took a glance of the clock that showed how late it was. 11:00. She groaned when she felt the night went too slow. She wished for the sun to rise soon as she need to get off of the lonely dark sky. She need to have her ears filled with her daughter's laugh instead of the sad hums of the television. But she soon wished for the time to froze as she looked outside the window. She doubted her eyes, and it wasn't a surprising thing. Well, she had even started to doubt Taeyeon's words.
Her heart beats fast, hammering her chest as she decided to trust her eyes for one more time. Her feet lifted her weak body off the couch and she made her way to the front door. She unclocked it and went out barefootedly. Just like before, she didn't even think to give her cold feet any mercy.
She walked and walked, until the shine of the moonlight cut through the clear night and showered their figures. Their.
"Taeyeon-" Her breath got cut by the soft thuds of large millitary bags that were dropped on the pavement. Tears streamed down freely when the soldier took her cap off her head, showing her teary face. Her strong fist gripped on her cap tight as she smiled in between her tears. She wetted her dried lips and said
"Tiffany, I'm sorry I'm late. But I'm finally home now"
Without any further words, sounds of combat boots hitting down the pavement echoed in the sidewalk, and the longing bodies finally met. Tiffany had never felt so relieved and safe being wrapped around Taeyeon's strong arms. She tightened her arms around Taeyeon's neck as she couldn't stop her tears from falling
"You're home. You're finally home. Welcome home, Taeyeon" Taeyeon shut her eyes close as she felt fresh tear flowed down her cheek. They stayed on each other's embrace for as long as they wanted, bathed in the moonlight and the ray from street lights. Tiffany pulled away slightly to meet Taeyeon's eyes. She put her palms on Taeyeon's cheeks as they showed their longing through their eyes.
"You're really here.. but- how ?" She caressed Taeyeon's cheek and down to the crook of her neck
"I.. I thought.. I thought you.. really left me" Tiffany said in between her sobs, tears were flowing freely down her face
"I promised you, didn't I ? I don't want to be someone who keeps on breaking promisses" Taeyeon said before she closed her eyes and inched in to meet their lips. Frowns were written on their faces as the fire that had been set from their collided lips struck all over their bodies. Tiffany's lips pulled back for a second just to take a breath in before she came back for a deeper one. Their lips moved slowly and surely, letting out their longing that had been locked up for months. After a while, Tiffany pulled back when she needed the air. Still with her eyes closed, Taeyeon leaned forward and pressed their forehead together.
"There's a mistake on the report if they said they didn't found my body.." Taeyeon moved her hand up and softly caressed Tiffany's cheek with the back of her fingers. Gently, like she was made of glass
"Tiffany.. I know it's kinda late.. but I'm glad I still got the chance to keep my promises. I hope you don't mind"
Tiffany shook her head. She didn't mind at all
"All that matters is that you're here now"
"I'm glad to be here" Taeyeon said sweetly with a smile that cracked a smile on Tiffany's face too.
"I've missed you" She said again while softly brushing their noses
"I've missed you too" They had their eyes closed again when Taeyeon trailed the tip of her nose from the bridge of Tiffany's nose and down to her tip before she put a sweet peck there that made Tiffany crinkled her nose and smiled even wider. Tiffany's hands took Taeyeon's from her waist and guided her slowly to her protruding stomach. She smiled when she felt Taeyeon's trembling hand slowly caressed her
"Your baby, Tae" Taeyeon pulled back to meet their eyes. They couldn't deny the butterflies and sparks when their eyes met. Taeyeon carefully got down on her knees and pressed a soft kiss on her stomach
"My baby" Tiffany got her left hand covering Taeyeon's right that was resting on the side of her baby bump. She moved her right hand to caress the back of Taeyeon's head when she felt Taeyeon gently nuzzled her cheek there
"Your baby girl to be exact. Just like what you wanted"
-xxx-
"Don't you think these bullet holes wounds looks cool ?"
Taeyeon's voice filled their quiet room, followed by a light slapping sound and giggles
"You're crazy"
"Ow ow ow" Tiffany pulled her hands off Taeyeon's shoulder when Taeyeon winced in pain
"Sorry ! Too tight ?"
"Nope, nope. It's just still hurts sometimes" Tiffany nodded in understanding while she continued to wrap the bandage around Taeyeon's left shoulder and chest
"Done"
"Thank you babe" Smiles invaded their faces when Tiffany placed a soft kiss on Taeyeon's uninjured shoulder. Tiffany helped her to slip a fresh loose tank top on before they settled themselves on their bed. They lay face to face, admiring each other and let their eyes do the talk. Taeyeon moved her right hand to caress Tiffany's cheek before she wetted her lips and inched in. They shut their eyes close when their lips moved slow in a light liplock session. Taeyeon took the lead by capturing Tiffany's upper lip, gently suckling and nibling on it. Tiffany's hand moved to grip on Taeyeon's tee to pull her closer. They smiled in between their kisses when Taeyeon put her hand over Tiffany's as she moved closer.
"Oh !"
"What ?" Tiffany could only confusedly saw Taeyeon jumped out from the bed and walked to the human-sized teddy bear that was already been moved to the chair near the window. And she finally had a smile on her face when she got what Taeyeon was doing. Taeyeon went back to the bed with a white gold ring and sat infront of Tiffany. She handed out the ring with the smile
"Just like what I planned" Tiffany giggled more and she gently slipped the ring on Taeyeon's fourth finger. It fitted her perfectly
"You already know this, but I'm forever yours, Tiffany" Taeyeon said sweetly with a smile before she took both of Tiffany's hands in hers and gave them sweet kisses on her knuckles
"And I'm forever yours" Tiffany said before pressing her lips on Taeyeon. They couldn't hide their smiles as they met their lips together. Taeyeon gently pulled Tiffany's hands around her neck and led her to lay back on the bed using her kisses. Her arms around Taeyeon's neck got tighter when Taeyeon got on top of her, hands and knees propping her body to prevent herself from pressuring the baby bump. They kissed deeper, showing how much they've missed each other's presence. Taeyeon's tongue traced the shape of Tiffany's upper lip sexily and ended it with a stronger suck. Tiffany immediately parted her lips to let her tongue out and meet Taeyeon's. A soft moan escaped Tiffany's lips when she felt Taeyeon's pushed their tongues inside, dominating the tongue battle. Tiffany jerked her body when Taeyeon accidentally brushed her knee on her centre
"Oops" Taeyeon said cutely as broke the kiss. Smiles were visible on their faces once again. Tiffany shook her head before she pulled Taeyeon closer by her neck for another kiss. They could never get enough of each other and they knew it. But before even their lips met, a hushed voice stopped Taeyeon
"Tae !"
"What ?!"
"The baby just moved again !"
"Yea ?" Gleam filled Taeyeon's eyes as she got off from on top of Tiffany and lay on her side, facing Tiffany. The brunette took Taeyeon's hand and led her to rest her hand on top of the baby bump. Silence filled their room as they waited for the baby to make another movement.
"Oh my gosh she really moved !" Taeyeon said joyfully as she felt the small movement. She moved her head to kiss Tiffany's forehead and a lingering one on her stomach
"Daddy can't wait to see you, baby girl. I want to hug you so bad" She mumbled close to her baby like she can really hear her. Tiffany couldn't help but let out a tear drop while witnessing the scene in front of her own eyes. Taeyeon had never got the chance to do that. It was beautiful. Seeing Taeyeon being so gentle with their child will always hit her soft spot
"..be a nice girl, don't give mommy too much hardships, come out to see mommy, daddy and Irene unnie when it's time, and let daddy love you like a princess you are" Another fresh tears escaped her eyes as she caressed Taeyeon's head lovingly. Tiffany moved her free hand to her stomach to meet Taeyeon's, intertwining them, and their rings finally placed side to side once again.
"I love you so much, baby girl" Taeyeon pressed another kiss before she sat up
"Nawww don't you cry again my big baby" Taeyeon said jokingly with a crying face while she moved up to kiss her wife's lips and forehead before she lay sprawled near Tiffany's body. Tiffany scoffed and turned her body to face Taeyeon, snuggling close to her. She threw one of her leg on top of Taeyeon's while she hugged her arm carefully
"Taeyeon" She whispered softly while pressing a kiss on Taeyeon's exposed shoulder
"Hm ?"
"My Taeyeon" Taeyeon turned her head to just see her wife who placed another kiss on her shoulder. Tiffany looked up and smiled when their eyes met. Taeyeon had bullets being shot through her but she still thought that the arrows that been shot right to her heart when Tiffany smiled at her is more deathly. She could only smile like a fool and slowly closed her eyes as she saw Tiffany moved closer to her with her eyes closed and lips slightly parted. Tiffany gently captured her upper lip in between her own for a good three seconds before she pulled back biting her lower lip
"What is it ?" She mumbled as she had her eyes locked to the lip bite in front of her
"I love you" Wider smile appeared on Taeyeon's face as she saw her wife's smiling eyes and hearing the magical three words
"I love you too" Their lips met for more sweet kisses before Tiffany decided to let the both of them rest for the night, the first and the most comfortable one after months. She snuggled closer to Taeyeon, gently hugging her arm and pressing her nose to Taeyeon's shoulder. Taeyeon sighed in contentment after she closed her eyes. She had her aching body rested on the soft bed, under the warm comforter, and lying next to her wife. She thought she couldn't feel lighter than that. Just when her drowsiness almost done consuming her whole, a cheery whisper woke her up
"Taetae. Let's go on a date"
"Would you like that ?" Taeyeon asked absentmindedly, her voice were heavy with tiredness
"Hm.. I would love that. We haven't go on dates since like.. two years ago, maybe.. I don't know"
"Sure. Let's go. Waffles for breakfast in the cafe down the street and go groceries shopping ? Call ?"
"Call"
Couldn't hide her excitement, Tiffany moved to kiss Taeyeon's smiling cheek. Her smile got wider but she kept her eyes closed, too sleepy and tired to open them. But then she felt movements on the bed. She opened her eyes out of curiousity just to see her wife sitting on the edge of the bed
"Where are you going ?" Taeyeon asked, her sleepy eyes were squinted
"Kitchen. I feel like having strawberries and some cheese cream. You go to sleep first, I'll join in after I have some" Just when she almost stood up, a hand stopped her by her wrist
"I'll get it for you"
She used to go downstairs alone at night to grab foods. But her heart couldn't help but to flutter when she saw Taeyeon faught against her heavy eyelids and aching body just to fulfill her need. She saw Taeyeon sweetly smiled at her with her puppy-like sleepy face before all Tiffany could see was her strong back as she walked to the door. With a smile, she lay back on the bed while she waited for Taeyeon with a full heart.
-xxx-
The night was calm, they ended up curled together, with Tiffany burrying her face on the back of Taeyeon's neck and her hand that was intertwined with Taeyeon's was put close to Taeyeon's chest. Moonlight seeped through the curtain, shone on the empty bowl on top of the nightstand and reflecting on the hardwood floor. It was so favorable until
"No.. I have to come home.." Tiffany woke up to Taeyeon's soft whimpers. She propped her body with her elbow as she moved her hand to touch Taeyeon's arm gently. She was soaked with cold sweat she didn't even felt before
"I have to see Tiffany and our kids.. I promised them.."
"Taeyeon, wake up" She said as she gently patted Taeyeon's arm
"..I have to come home.."
"Taeyeon, babe. You're home. Wake up"
"..I don't want to die yet.. I want to see my family.. Please let me come home, please.. please"
"Taeyeon !" The whimpers finally stopped as Taeyeon opened her eyes in horror. Her breath was heavy, cold sweat drenched her. She locked her eyes to the window in front of her, and she knew she was home. She immediately turned her body and sighed in relieve when she saw Tiffany there. Worry was written on her face, along with a sad frown. Taeyeon immediately and carefully threw her body to Tiffany's welcoming hug
"I'm here with you, Tae. And you're home" Taeyeon buried her face on Tiffany's chest even more as Tiffany pulled her closer, her hand caressing the back of her head gently. She closed her eyes tight tried to get the fear out from her head with inhaling Tiffany's scent and kept on telling herself that she was home, that she was safe.
It scared Tiffany to see her strong and brave lover to be so affected like that. She heard younger Taeyeon laughing over her own terrible wounds, and she even saw Taeyeon being completely calm when Tiffany herself was almost blacked out once seeing Taeyeon in the hospital. But she had never seen Taeyeon like that. She had never seen Taeyeon so fragile before.
"I was so close to death. I'm still scared, Fany-ah. I don't want to leave you" Taeyeon said while gripping on Tiffany's shirt even more. Tiffany felt hot tears escaping her eyes as she also felt her soulmate's emotional pain.
"Shhh shhh.. You're not going anywhere. And I'm not, too. It's all over, Taeyeon-ah. It's all over" Taeyeon nodded on her hold. She agreed, it was all over.
Tiffany's soothing caresses calmed her down fast, her grip on Tiffany's shirt started to got loose and her fists are opened. After a while, Taeyeon looked up with her flushed face. Tiffany shone her bright smile, hoping to cure her atleast a little bit. But it cured her a lot, proved by the similar smile on Taeyeon's face. Tiffany moved one of her hand to wipe the sweat off Taeyeon's forehead before she pressed a loving kiss there
"I'm sorry.."
"Awww you don't need to say sorry. Soldiers are humans, too, you know. It's normal for humans to be scared at times" Tiffany coaxed while caressing Taeyeon's cheek. Taeyeon gulped and nodded before Tiffany's lips landed on hers, leaving a smile there. Their bodies shifted into a more comfortable position. Taeyeon sighed as she rested her head on Tiffany's chest, moving up and down slightly on every breath she took. Their breaths were even, and their hearts beats as one. Wrapped around Tiffany's arm and drowned in her scent, Taeyeon found her peace once again. She could only let her body being dragged back to her dreamland by the soft touches of her love. Tiffany was her home, and the one Taeyeon found her solace within.
"I love you, Taetae"
And her voice, conveying those words, was another cure her wounded soul cried for.