Chapter 34 – Bad News
A ceaseless rain had been hammering the windows of the small living room for hours. The sound of the drops drowned out the ticking of the clock whose pendulum swung accordingly. The place was modest but comfortable with its three armchairs arranged around a coffee table on which sat a Pai-Sho board, abandoned in the middle of a game, and three cups of cooled tea. A comforting fire roared in the hearth and Kadao took care of it by shooting a jet of flame towards the logs with the tip of his index finger each time it waned. Outside, the atmosphere had darkened, only sign of nightfall. The sky had remained the same depressing gray hue all day, making it impossible to tell what time it was without consulting a watch or the clock on the wall.
Satoshi and Kadao were waiting there for General Iroh's return. Satoshi, a man in his thirties, stocky as farm boys often are, had retired to a corner of the room on a stool and was silently polishing the hilt of his saber, which he gazed at lovingly.
Kadao and Satoshi had known each other for a long time and had shared many missions in the past. However, they rarely had to be left alone like now. Satoshi was a taciturn, solitary boy who showed little interest in long philosophical conversations, politics, and Pai-Sho games, preferring the training ground and weapons. He mostly stayed in the background during the heated discussions that kept Iroh and Kadao awake for hours after dark. But Kadao knew he was a loyal man and an exceptional fighter in both swordsmanship and firebending. He would have entrusted his life to him without hesitation.
Still, he would have liked Iroh to come home. The prolonged silence that had settled between the two men was getting heavy. The haunting sound of raindrops lashing against the roof above their heads did nothing to soothe his discomfort. The old man had been gone for several hours and Kadao wondered if he should go out and look for him.
The swampy area in which they were wasn't exactly suitable for nocturnal excursions and Kadao was a little worried. For three days they had been riding painfully in these wetlands which stretched to the northwest of Omashu. They had chosen to take this path to avoid crossing the Si Wong desert.
What if Iroh gets lost on the way home? He had no doubt that the old General was a resourceful man, but he was not getting any younger. A thick fog had risen and must make the small inn almost invisible to the eyes of lost travelers, perfect preys for the brigands roaming over these lands.
Settled in a small apartment composed of a living room and a bedroom-dormitory, on the top floor of the establishment, the three men were hidden from curious gazes. The voices and muffled laughter of the inn's customers vaguely reached them. Kadao would have liked to join them and find some human warmth among them. Besides, there would have been no great risk. Their brown clothes and wandering looks would make them almost invisible, but it was better to avoid getting caught. Fire Nation citizens were not welcome in these secluded areas of the Earth Kingdom, nor were they in the colonies the three men had approach during their journey to Ba Sing Se.
They were halfway to their destination and the torrential rains that fell on the region they were crossing terribly slowed their progress. Kadao was beginning to fear that they would not arrive in Ba Sing Se in time to fulfill the mission Zuko had entrusted them with.
Out of loyalty to the Fire Lord, Kadao refrained from forming his own opinion. Iroh did not show the same reluctance and didn't hesitate to confess his dismay at his nephew's wedding project.
It was probably not a bad idea to ally with Kuei, but the risk was great that the king refuses. Like Iroh, Kadao couldn't get out of this unpleasant thought: what if Zuko had used this mission as a pretext to keep them away from the Caldera? He felt the Princess's mark in this strange story. He tried not to imagine the siblings, together, plotting against the Avatar and the Council of the Fire Sages, perhaps taking advantage of their uncle's absence to indulge in their unnatural desires.
Kadao was ashamed of that thought but he couldn't help it. It kept popping into his head over and over again. Zuko's behavior over the past few months far exceeded that of an older brother willing to defend his sister's interests. And despite all the respect he felt for them, Kadao couldn't think of them without a hint of disgust. They never talked about that, he, Satoshi and Iroh, but the prospect of this criminal union and its consequences pierced in each of their discussions, seemed to float above them like a dark cloud. What would happen to the nation if Zuko and Azula finally decided that their royal status allowed them to break the men's laws?
Kadao shook his head to dispel the intrusive thought. Satoshi raised pale eyes under questioning eyebrows. Kadao gave him a smile that he tried to make confident. The warrior shrugged and returned his attention to his sword.
Kadao tried to reason with himself. No, surely the Fire Lord would not make such a mistake. No one in the Fire Nation would agree. He supposed that the crude propaganda posters they found all over the towns and villages they passed fueled his fears. Mistrust and hatred towards Zuko seeped into every corner of the Earth Kingdom, one blaming the Fire Lord for his inaction in the colonies, one seeing him as a belligerent and violent ruler who threatened their hard-won peace. The young man seemed almost more unpopular than his father and grandfather in those territories the Fire Nation had once controlled with an iron fist.
People quickly forget, Kadao thought with a sigh.
Without forgetting their mission, Iroh, Satoshi and Kadao tried to gather as much information as possible on the political situation. Passing through Omashu, they had been worried to find a weakened, bedridden King Bumi who didn't seem to really understand what was going on outside his palace walls and barely recognized them. His eldest son had managed to contain the anger of his citizens by proving them right. He fueled distrust towards Zuko with much propaganda and by denying entry to Fire Nation citizens fleeing the colonies. The nationalist spirit that ran through the legendary citadel had greatly worried the three men. Unfortunately, they hadn't had time to dwell on it. Besides, they had felt that they were not welcome here.
Iroh had gone out tonight to find members of the White Lotus, hoping they would have some valuable information for him. The discovery, two days earlier, of what had happened to the old Shyu never ceased to horrify Kadao. This news had left them awake all night, all three speculating about this sordid murder. They didn't know more than what they had heard from the men—obviously soldiers—who were exchanging news at the next table of the hostel where they had stopped. The former general's friends were probably better informed… The rest of their trip would depend on what they would tell him.
Plunged in his thoughts, Kadao didn't heard the door of the small living room open and he shouted in surprise mixed with relief when he saw the hooded and soaked figure of Iroh appear, shaking his graying head from right to left like a dog coming out of a pond.
"What a filthy weather!" the old man exclaimed with a quiet smile as he pulled back his hood which revealed his bald head glistening with pearls of rain.
"General Iroh!" Kadao cried out, getting up and heading to him to rid him of his soaked coat as Iroh kicked off his muddy shoes.
Satoshi had vaguely raised his head when he entered but was already returned to the blade of his sword which he began to clean with a piece of fabric. Despite the indifference he displayed, Kadao knew that Satoshi wouldn't lose a crumb of the conversation.
Kadao guided Iroh to an armchair which he moved towards him and rushed to the hearth. He smothered the flames until only glowing embers remained and placed a cast iron kettle on top of them.
"Thank you Kadao," Iroh said with a smile, bringing the chair of the coffee table together. "Crossing these marshes was not exactly a picnic! At least not for me! I think mosquitoes have confused me with their dinner."
"Did you find the people you were looking for?" Kadao inquired eagerly, turning to search a small tin for Iroh's favorite tea.
"Actually, yes," Iroh replied grimly. "And I don't have good news."
Kadao couldn't say he was surprised but that didn't prevent his insides from contracting painfully at the mention of what he already guessed.
First Iroh spoke of the probably criminal mudslides that had engulfed villages on the eastern tip of the Highlands.
"It's not just that," Iroh said darkly before Kadao could comment. "Zuko took advantage of our absence to change the Constitution once again."
Even Satoshi stopped polishing his sword and exchanged bewildered looks with Kadao.
"What do you mean?" the General inquired. "Didn't he change it already?"
"You know like me that Zuko's power was limited by the Council of Elders who took care to control any possible authoritarian drift. Well, it's over."
"But I don't understand," Kadao stammered. "Just the other day, we learned that he had entrusted them with more powers. That he had appointed them to lead the nation if he himself were to disappear!"
"Guess that was only part of a bigger plan," Iroh said sadly.
So he told them.
In the capital, pamphlets against the Sages had blossomed: after the Avatar's sudden silence, people had started to question their role and power. It was claimed that they were manipulating Zuko, that they had coerced him into a too complaisant policy towards the Earth Kingdom. The share of power he had given them in the new constitution confirmed their growing influence.
"Zuko has officially announced his engagement to King Kuei's daughter," Iroh announced much to the dismay of Kadao and Satoshi who stared at him dumbfounded. "I don't know how it's possible. Apparently he found a way to reach him otherwise. They made a deal. I now know why we have encountered so many travelers heading west recently. Zuko and Kuei organized humanitarian corridors in order to evacuate settlers to the Caldera safely."
"I imagine the Sons of Agni aren't very happy with this arrangement?" Kadao chanced, his throat tight.
"Indeed," Iroh replied. "The anger towards the Elders grew and reached maddening proportions. Shyu's assassination took place within days of these announcements. My nephew and niece's plan was brilliant – Yes, my friends, I'm sure now they are behind this!"
"Do you really think they could have anticipated all this? It would be taking huge risks, wouldn't it? They could have been the target of the attacks, don't you think?"
"I'm sure Azula is pulling the strings," Iroh commented. "It looks like her. My brother was also a great strategist. He taught her everything. I should have been wary. The Council of Elders had become an obsession for Zuko by the time we left. If that's true, I don't know what dangerous game my niece is playing, but I have the very clear impression that she is gradually getting rid of all Zuko's supporters, that she is cleaning up around them. No doubt to isolate him and better control him."
Kadao said nothing but nodded. The idea had crossed his mind more than once since they had started this trip. He let a silence pass and asked:
"And what will happen now? The Council of Elders is completely dissolved? It's finish?"
"After Shiyu's death, Master Sun-Jian was appointed to succeed him. But he quit the next day, after receiving death threats and, from what I understand, a very unpleasant package."
"Don't tell me it was..."
"Yes. Shyu's heart that had been ripped out of his chest at the time of his death. Master Sun-Jian and the others were completely panicked. No one wanted to take the leadership of the Council anymore. All of the Sages went to Zuko and they begged him to reconsider the new constitution."
"So the Fire Lord has regained full power? Just like that? And the people don't rise up? However, he has become very unpopular in recent months…"
"You forgot my niece! Agni! How could I leave him alone with her?" lamented Iroh who seemed really depressed. "She has thought of everything! All this anti-Sage propaganda, it was part of her plan! The hatred against them has reached such a degree that the people have forgotten their distrust of Zuko!"
"Tell us, General Iroh!" Kadao urged him. All this news was overwhelming but fascinating at the same time.
Iroh complied.
Consulted by referendum for the first time in its entire history, the people had taken the decision to restore imperial dignity to the Fire Lord, muzzling the word of the Fire Sages Council, now reduced to a simple consultative entity. Zuko was completely free to ignore them and now reigned supreme.
"Do you see the genius of this plan, my friends? Zuko has regained all of his powers while letting the people believe that they have decided their future. He even announced the creation of a citizens' assembly made up of representatives of different guilds that he promised to consult on a weekly basis. But I have no illusions: these men are all corrupt. Zuko will satisfy his opponents from time to time, on matters of no importance. So people will continue to believe that they are listened to."
That was worrying. Far worse than anything Kadao had imagined. He couldn't believe that the Fire Lord, that young idealist whom he had advised and known as a teenager, whom he had seen doubting, whom he had seen struggling never to become a tyrant like his ancestors...that this boy would have turned into such a cynical, corrupt leader, ready to have his opponents assassinated! Poor Shyu. Even though Kadao didn't like the Elders very much, he had always held the Great Sage in high regard. He didn't deserve such a prosaic ending.
"What about the Sons of Agni?" he ventured, resigned to hearing more bad news. "They were the first to discredit the Fire Lord..."
"Zuko officially named them responsible for the Great Sage's murder," the former general replied. "The Sons of Agni are hunted down and their movement has been stricken with high treason. Anyone suspected of having relations with them, directly or indirectly, is immediately arrested. Kojiro is actively sought and accused of having dishonored the princess."
"Do you think these repressive measures will be enough to contain the movement? They seemed pretty determined so far!"
"I quite agree with you. And I'm afraid in their case, Zuko was playing with fire. I have received alarming information about the seven missing high-ranking officers. It looks like these men weren't abducted as we thought. At least three of them have been seen by members of our order in the surrounding mountains. A perfect place to hide while waiting to take action. According to my guy, they're doing just as well as you and me."
"Have they allied themselves with the Sons of Agni, as we feared?"
"Hard to say, but most likely," Iroh replied, absently moving a pawn on the Pai-Sho board, as if to resume the game abandoned a few hours earlier. "What we feared is inevitable now, my dear Kadao. One of us must get back to the Caldera as soon as possible to warn Zuko in person."
"Whether the Sons of Agni are in cahoots with the rebels or not, the danger remains the same," Satoshi said much to Kadao's surprise. "If the fanatics learn that our army is weakened, they will take advantage of it anyway."
"No doubt," Kadao replied, looking concerned. "And the way they use Kojiro makes me think that this alliance is real. I can't see Tsuneo giving up on his son after everything that's happened."
They stayed silent for a moment, each lost in his thoughts. The rain outside increased in intensity. The excitement of receiving fresh news gave way to a gloomy and heavy atmosphere. Finally, unable to bear it any longer, Kadao broke the silence.
"Come on my friends, let's try to stay optimistic. If the Fire Lord has truly made an alliance with the Earth King, even with our army diminished, we remain a deterrent to our enemies."
"For the moment yes, but if, as I fear, Zuko stubbornly keeps to protect and listen to his sister and tries to restore her power, he will even lose this support and he will be totally isolated."
Kadao would have liked to say that such a scenario wouldn't happen, but he didn't believe it himself. Zuko lost all discernment when it came to the princess. What would happen when she convinced him to trample on his alliance with Kuei, the moment he became embarrassing to them. And what would Aang do when he learned what had happened?
The night was dark and cloudy now. Satoshi had abandoned his equipment and walked towards the kettle whistling in the hearth. He brought it to the table and poured tea into the cups.
After a long silence, Kadao spoke.
"I'll go," he announced decisively. "Tomorrow, at dawn, I will take the road to the Caldera. I'll take care of warning the Fire Lord and I'll protect him. I'll make him listen to reason."
Iroh looked up at him with two grateful amber eyes. He lifted the cup to his lips, took a sip and smiled.
"I knew I could count on you. Satoshi and I are going to look for Aang and his friends. We need the Avatar more than ever."
"Very well," Kadao nodded.
Iroh grabbed a Pai-Sho pawn in front of him and rolled it between his fingers, looking more preoccupied than ever. He heaved a sigh, then whispered:
"General, when you're at the Caldera, please tell Zuko to be more careful."
"Count on me."
Iroh paused for a moment but continued:
"And also, tell him that I believe in him, that I know he will do the right thing. Tell him to listen to what his good heart tells him..."
"Understood."
Silence fell and Kadao watched Iroh as he lifted the cup of hot tea to his lips. Silver tears beaded on his eyelids. For the first time since he knew him, he found that he really looked like an old man.
A blue ribbon streaked across the sky, snapping like a whip and crashing down on the shoulder of the Fire Lord, who stifled an exclamation of surprise before narrowly dodging with a roll the azure geyser that followed the first attack.
Propelling himself with the strength of his arms, he immediately stood up, on guard, ready to avoid the next offensive.
"Haven't you had enough, Zuzu? Do you need more?" the amused voice of his sister rose from where she was standing, in front of a wall of azure flames, facing him, dressed in battle outfit and a black breastplate that protected her shoulders and chest.
Her hair pulled up in a neat bun like she wore when she chased him around the world, her lips painted red, she smiled at him confidently. She looked so much like the old enemy that he could almost forget how much things had changed between them. Her incessant sarcasm was beginning to exasperate him and he was about to regret having agreed to this duel. He had tried to reason with her, had involved Taïma and Ty Lee but there had been nothing to do. She had harassed him so much that he finally gave in.
Azula's attacks may have regained their legendary power and extraordinary inventiveness, her movements in close combat remained slow and clumsy. The princess could take on any enemy as long as she kept a safe distance, but in the event of a surprise attack, she remained sadly vulnerable.
Zuko was reluctant to demonstrate it to her. He was afraid of hurting her and even more afraid of hurting her pride. Besides, she must know. that was probably why she was keeping a safe distance between them. She probably knew he was holding back the effect of his attacks. She knew him better than anyone and they had practiced together enough for her to be aware of it. No doubt that was why she was provoking him now.
"Poor Zuzu, beaten by his baby sister. While half of her bones were broken less than two months ago! Doesn't that tickle your oversized ego too much, brother dear?"
Well, she wants to play?
With a grunt, Zuko conjured up a fiery tornado that swept across the courtyard floor, rising a blinding cloud of dust. Azula easily dodged the attack with a smirk but she didn't see the orange streamer that wrapped around her ankle and pulled her down.
With a small scream, she broke free and, an expression of fierce joy imprinted on her face, she conjured azure geysers at the tips of her hands and feet and rushed towards Zuko as he had seen her do in the catacombs of Ba Sing Se and the day of their Agni Kai. When she was close enough, she leapt into the air in an impressive somersault, releasing from her feet and her fist three balls of blinding blue energy which exploded a few centimeters from where her brother stood.
He rolled on the ground again and fired a flurry of fiery projectiles at Azula who landed on her feet, crouched down and put her hand on the ground in a clumsy attempt to keep her balance.
Her smirk faded, replaced by suppressed anger and a look of deep annoyance that distorted her delicate features. A few strands escaped from her bun and she gave a furious growl.
There was another bang and Azula's body was thrown through the air and ended rolling to the ground on the dusty floor of the training yard.
Fighting the urge to check on her, Zuko just stood there, staring sternly at his sister who was lying on her stomach, her now disheveled hair falling over her furiously shaking shoulders.
Zuko slowly headed to her and when he got close enough, he glared at her from his full height. Panting, gasping, Azula refused to look up at him.
"You see? You're already exhausted. Give up now, Azula. I don't want to make you bite the dust again."
"I can do it, Zuko! Don't underestimate me!" she snapped, sputtering in rage. "A simple miscalculation at the time of landing"
Torn between amusement and exasperation, Zuko knelt in front of her and put a hand on her shoulder but she refused him. Her humiliation could be read in her drawn features and tawny eyes boiling with anger.
"Don't be ridiculous, Azula, let me help you up, you might hurt yourself."
"No way! It was just a misstep! This is my first fight in months. Give me revenge!"
In front of such eyes, you don't argue. Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Okay, but we're changing techniques. No more firebending: I want to see what you can do in close combat."
Azula stood up and wiped the dust off her face with a disdainful pout.
"No problem!" she challenged. "Hey! Where are you going?"
Zuko had moved away and was now heading towards the bleachers where he had abandoned his two twin sabers. He grabbed them and came back to Azula.
"If you are attacked, your enemy will surely be armed. Sorry if it seems unfair to you."
Azula gazed at the gleaming blades with a pure expression of contempt. She had always disdained swords, preferring bare-handed martial arts and relying on her extraordinary firebending. Unlike Zuko, she hadn't needed to find another field to compensate mediocre skills and had always mocked him when she watched her brother fight against wooden dummies planted in the ground.
"If you think you will scare me with your toys, you're far from the truth. Go ahead, brother, it's when you want."
"No fire, okay?"
"Sure, brother dear."
She got ready. Zuko was merciless. He twirled the two blades above his head, in a movement so rapid that they looked like two silver ribbons unfolding above his head. He executed a circular attack that Azula easily dodged. Very concentrated, she gazed at the swords while watching Zuko's feet who advanced towards her in a kind of strange and unpredictable dance.
She quickly let go of her sarcasm and Zuko could see that she wasn't so confident anymore. Azula was no beginner in this area. It was obvious that Ozai had taught her the basics of armed combat and she avoided sharp blades with the elegance of a dancer.
However, when Zuko's swords crossed in a clanking sound right under her nose, she cringed. She took a step to the side so as not to be cornered by her brother, who was following her, on guard, ready to strike. As he made a step ahead, Azula leapt, leaned on his blade and flew in a graceful twirl that allowed her to land a little further. But Zuko noticed the painful grimace that curled her lip as her foot hit the ground and he took the opportunity to lead a blistering side attack. Azula's eyes widened in surprise and fear and she fell on her buttocks, her hand raised to shield her face, defeated.
Zuko advanced towards her, threw down his blades, grabbed her by the wrist and lifted her forcefully.
"Close combat with bare hands," he demanded.
Legs shaking, looking uncertain, Azula positioned herself. The fight did not last long. Less than a minute later, Azula was subdued, face and stomach down on the floor. Sitting astride her, Zuko twisted her arm into a key she couldn't escape. He had managed to capture her right leg between his knee and his calf and was crushing Azula's who stifled an exclamation of pain.
After emitting furious grunts, she ended up hitting the ground next to her, kicking up a little dust which fell into her disheveled hair.
"Stop! Stop! Stop!" she finally begged.
Zuko released her at once, got up to his feet and waited, proudly standing in front of her, for her eyes to look up at him, bathed in tears of anger and shame.
The look on her face shocked him and the guilt twisted his insides. Azula was in a sad state. A thin layer of yellow dust had formed and caked on her cheeks, mingled with streaks of black tears that escaped from her smoky eyes. Her lower lip quivered and Zuko could see her teeth clenched like a wounded dog baring its fangs.
He fought his first impulse to help her up and to take her in his arms, he remained there instead, frozen in front of her in the attitude of the winner, his fists clenched on each side of his body.
"I think that will be enough for today," he announced, adamant.
"No! Let me try again! I was not focused enough! I got distracted, that's all!"
"Stop lying to me, Azula! You wanted me to train with you to prove that you could fight. You can't. You're not strong enough yet. I can't take you with me."
Azula scrambled to her feet, protecting with her hand the small cut that Zuko had made on her right arm just before she fell to the ground.
"No way! I refuse that you leave me behind, I want to come with you! We must do it together!"
"I took my decision. You will stay here with Ty Lee, Taïma and Master Shin. They will watch over you."
"I'm not worried about me, Zuko," she spat. "I refuse that you leave far from me! Let me accompany you, I'll stay behind, I swear! I could be useful to you, give you advice. Don't leave me please!" she begged him.
It was truly heartbreaking but Zuko's decision was adamant.
"No way. You are too vulnerable and if we are attacked, I will be distracted by your presence. I will only think about protecting you and I will make mistakes. We can't afford it. Don't worry about me, I'll be with our best men. They will protect me and I will be home very quickly. You have my word… Azula! Where are you going?"
But she nudged past him and headed as stubbornly as she could toward the back of the training yard. Zuko noticed with a pang the limp she was still afflicted with. Tonight, she would pay the full price for the effort she put into this training session.
Since Zuko had formally forbidden her the use of poppy milk which relieved her of her pain, she complained a lot about her pelvis and her ankle which she had sprained multiple times since her accident. Each time, Taïma took care of her as well as she could, but she had started to reprimand Azula for the negligence she showed towards her own health.
"If you don't rest and you keep overworking yourself, I won't be able to fix your ankle, and your pelvic bones are still fragile. They could fracture a second time and it could get really bad!"
Clearly, the healer's warnings bounced against Azula's stubbornness. That's why Zuko finally gave in to her repeated demands. He knew that better than words, a practical demonstration would be more likely to convince the headstrong princess.
Annoyed regardless, Zuko slowly picked up his two swords and followed the footprints Azula had left in her wake as she fled.
Ever since he had told her of his intention to leave for the village of Shu Jing – at least what was left of it – with a brigade of his best soldiers, Azula had been pestering him to let her go with him.
"I'm sure it's a trap," she kept repeating to him. "This is the second mudslide to wash away a Fire Nation village in a week, even though the rainy season is over and it hasn't rained a drop in all summer! You know very well who is behind all this! It's Lu Fang! He wants to lure you into an ambush, and you, poor stubborn fool that you are, are heading straight for the trap! He wouldn't do it differently if he tried to separate us!"
"You would normally be the first to advise me to go there! How do you expect me to regain their respect and trust if I remain in the background when a tragedy of this magnitude hit my people? They have to see me there, it's crucial for my image!"
But his little sister was not convinced. She kept repeating that he was crazy and unconscious, that if he really had to go, at least he must let her go with him.
"No, Azula. I'm supposed to have kicked you out of politics, remember? These people probably also figured out that Lu Fang is the perpetrator of the attack on their village. If they see the woman they believe responsible for all this mess appear, they will take it as a provocation on my part. I remind you that in the minds of many citizens, you are the starting point of this endless conflict. For others, you're the criminal who burned the face of an innocent. Until we get rid of all our enemies, you must stayed in the shadows!"
Nothing would make Zuko change his mind. Neither the cries, nor the threats, nor the tears, nor the long sulks that she sometimes imposed on him in the evening, during their face-to-face dinners. Zuko thought he knew why she was reacting so badly. Ty Lee had confided to him that the princess feared that he would push her aside to get rid of her and, in the long run, abandon her. No matter how hard he tried to reassure her, Azula refused to listen to reason. He couldn't blame her after all. He had been clear with her on their last night on Ember Island: he would never give her what she wanted. It was therefore no wonder that she felt betrayed and had such fears.
Something else probably explained Azula's bad mood. These two successive tragedies had cost the lives of more than one hundred villagers and destroyed the homes o five hundred people, forced to move to neighboring towns. Zuko thought he knew what was upsetting his sister: she wasn't in control of the situation as much as she thought. They might have managed to get rid of the Sages but they had other enemies. She probably shared with him the unpleasant feeling that Lu Fang was always one step ahead. Yet none of them dared to formulate this thought aloud.
By these exactions, Lu Fang maintained a climate of permanent insecurity which forced Zuko to act in spite of him. Azula was right, of course. It had to be a trap. Either Lu Fang was there, waiting for him, or it was another way for him to discredit Zuko with his people, hoping he wouldn't do anything. Both solutions were equally dangerous.
The Fire Lord was convinced that Azula's shady mood over the past few days had something to do with this observation: Lu Fang was talented, very talented. His trickery at least matched Azula's and she resented being faced with such a devious rival.
As he reached the columns marking the palace entrance, Zuko wondered if he should follow Azula or let her calm down on her own. He would leave the next day and he had many urgent matters to settle before departure. He bitterly regretted following Azula's orders and sending Kadao with Uncle Iroh. His help and advice would have been invaluable. If he was there, Zuko could have ordered him to stay at the palace to watch over Azula in his absence. Master Shin was a trustworthy man and an outstanding fighter. Zuko would have entrusted his life to him without hesitation. But it wasn't about his life: it was about his most precious treasure.
The idea of taking her with him was tempting. But Azula herself, if she had acted in good faith, would have recognized that it was stupid. To appear in public alongside her as they tried to prove to everyone that she was not Zuko's eminence grise was political suicide. It was too early. One day he would give her the place he had promised her, at his right on the throne. But she had to wait.
Eventually, Zuko decided to let Azula calmly recover from her anger and humiliation. He would come find her later. He would slip into her bed under the cover of darkness, as she liked to do in his, through the secret passage. There, to soften her, he would invite her to snuggle up against him under the sheets and their argument would be forgotten in tender embraces.
It would be harder to contain himself tonight. The prospect of leaving her the next day was already haunting him, although he was sure of his decision. He had grown used to feeling her warmth next to him in his bed.
They had naturally taken this habit, without them needing to talk about it, against all common sense and despite Zuko's promises to Taïma not to put himself into situations that could favor what they both called his missteps.
Zuko hardly complained about that. When doubt gripped him, when a dull anguish would keep him awake for hours, almost suffocated by the fear that their plans failed, he liked to find the shape of her dozing body next to his. Getting closer to her and putting an arm around her waist, feeling her reality, feeling her toned body under his hand, inhaling her perfume as if to make sure she was alive.
Their nocturnal meetings remained chaste. Zuko scrupulously watched over it, although more than once, the fraternal hugs and the face kisses had almost turned into something more tender. It would happen that a hand numb with sleep ventured a little into forbidden lands, that an innocent kiss placed in the neck or on the shoulder of the other lasted longer than what was really necessary.
The hypnosis sessions with Taïma no longer had the effect he had hoped for. Zuko had told her about Katara, what she had done to Azula that had practically erased all memory of what had happened between them on Ember Island. But the healer's response had been disappointing.
"It doesn't work like that, Zuko. It was a traumatic memory that was damaging Azula's mind. The method Katara used wouldn't work on you, not weeks later. And it can't erase your feelings for the princess either. Our sessions should allow you to learn to curb your impulses, to keep control over your desires. Expect nothing more. You must continue practicing your meditation and hypnosis exercises!"
Zuko gave a contemptuous snort. He was the ruler of the most powerful nation in the world. As if he had time to meditate! If only he could unwind himself by joining Hachiko whenever the desire got out of control. But although he expected and waited for them with an excitement mixed with apprehension, Azula's secret visits, as frequent as they were unpredictable, complicated these nocturnal escapades.
Zuko hadn't dared to talk about Hachiko with Taïma. She was his shameful secret, his ignoble outlet, his desire made flesh. Nor had he told her about the nights his sister spent in his bed. She would have reproached him for playing with fire, for actively seeking what he claimed to avoid. He didn't want to be lectured, or confronted with his own contradictions.
He had spent a few delicate minutes five days before when, snooping in Zuko's room Azula had found her crown and one of her lipstick tubes on her brother's desk.
"What is my crown doing here?" she wondered. "I've been looking for it everywhere!"
Although he had stripped her of her title of Crown Princess, Zuko hadn't had the heart to take away this crown that he had given back to her with such emotion almost a year and a half ago. He had therefore authorized her to keep it on the condition that she take great care to hide it and stop wearing it. That day, discovering it among his belongings, Azula was surprised at first, then she laughed at him, suggesting that her brother had very singular hobbies.
"I wouldn't have thought it was your style to dress up as a girl. But maybe I shouldn't be surprised. If I remember correctly, you liked to play that when we were kids!" she teased.
Eventually, she was so amused at his embarrassment and her own joke that she forgot to question him further and Zuko narrowly got out of this situation by letting her mocking him. Since then, he avoided taking the crown when he went to see Hachiko. It wasn't that bad. Azula didn't wear it when they... when she had wanted to...
Don't think about that! he admonished himself.
Zuko finally ended up in the guard room where, as he had hoped, he found Commander Thian who would escort him to Shu Jing. There, Master Piandao would be waiting for him in order to show him the remains of the village that a spectacular mudslide had swept away and engulfed in a few minutes.
Zuko wasn't sure he'd learn much from this trip, but at least they would see him there.
"Fire Lord, Your Higness!" the Commander saluted, bowing deeply, fist to palm.
"Is everything ready for our departure, Commander?"
"Soon, my Lord. We are preparing the last tanks and the aircraft is going through the last security checks. We will be ready to leave at dawn."
"Perfect," Zuko replied, satisfied with what he heard.
He stayed with Thian for a while to check the final preparations and decide with him on the men and women who would accompany them. He gave his orders to ensure the protection of the residents of the palace for the time he would be away. Finally, when it was all over, he dismissed everyone and allowed himself to join his sister, whom he imagined foaming with rage, burning the curtains of her four-poster bed or pacing in her room under the wild eyes of a helpless Ty Lee.
Zuko thanked the gods that his sister had regained sufficient mental stability so that he was not overly afraid of the consequences of an argument. To tell the truth, he was even impatient to find her and hoped that she would welcome him. If Azula was right and that the mission was so dangerous, he intended to make the last hours that he would spend with her a beautiful memory.
The eerie landscape that stretched before them was even more impressive at night. The monochrome shape of the collapsed buildings, the roofs that still emerged from the cracked ground, the piles of dried mud that formed swirls here and there, all this gave these desolate, once fertile lands, an almost poetic aspect.
Stars, cold and indifferent, twinkled far above this carnage. From afar, they could hear the quiet noise of conversations and see the moving lights emanating from the makeshift camp where the stricken families had gathered.
Not that Lu Fang was particularly fond of chaos and destruction. He was an ordinary man. He aspired like everyone else to a pleasant and happy life for his loved ones and he had no particular taste for blood. Its sight didn't bother him as soon as it was for a right cause. Though he had to admit that he had always been sensitive to the singular melancholy of ravaged scenary: whether it was the battlefields, in the evening, after the vanquished had sounded the clarion, or the great still and silent expanses of the Si Wong desert.
He would rather have liked to be alone to lose himself in the contemplation of this once lush valley, now covered with a thick layer of yellowish mud from which emerged a few trees, their branches dangling miserably towards the ground, broken and defeated, like the inhabitants. But of course he couldn't afford to spend much time with himself. Troubled times are not made for lonely souls.
So he suppressed a sigh when Wu, who was standing next to him, his eternal quiet smile engraved on his oblong face, addressed him again:
"The Fire Lord will be here tomorrow," he said. "We should finish fitting out the tunnels if we want to hide everyone before they arrive."
Lu Fang took a deep breath to force himself to be patient. It was stronger than him: everything about Wu horrified him: from his quiet smile to his long reptilian face, passing through his strange eyes and the measured tone of his voice. Lu Fang disliked sneaky people of his kind and longed to get rid of them before Wu and his little companions found another master to serve.
"Men are at work. Everything will be ready at dawn, as planned. You better mind your own business. By the way, are you still ready to complete the mission I told you about the other day?" Lu Fang asked without bothering to coat his voice with courtesy.
"More than ever, Your Excellency," the boy replied bowing. "I've been preparing for it since the moment you entrusted it to me."
"Are you aware of the dangers you run into accepting it?" he reminded him through gritted teeth, in the grip of a new wave of exasperation at the impassive attitude of his servant.
"I do not ignore them, Your Excellency. I live only to serve your goals."
"In that case, do me a favor. I need someone I can trust to make sure our special guest feels welcome in our new quarters."
"Immediately, Sir."
And with a last inclination, Wu walked away backwards, finally leaving Lu Fang alone to face this sea of mud. When squinting, the mounds that had formed on the cracked surface of the ground made him think of waves, the pointed tops of the fir trees that protruded from the earth were like the fins of some sea-hunting monster.
Lu Fang let out a long sigh. Patience was the key to his plan. He was aware of this. And it was necessary with such allies.
Lu Fang wasn't just mad at Wu. The way those stupid Sons of Agni had ruined everything continued to drive him mad. Their gratuitous barbarism towards the settlers, men, women, children, the senseless murder of the Great Sage, executed like a pig in his bathtub, their inability to arouse hatred against Zuko, all this made them look like amateurs in his eyes.
Because of their stupidity, Zuko had regained full powers. He was now, once again, the undisputed ruler of the Fire Nation. And the Sons of Agni had made traitors of themselves. In everyone's eyes, they were nothing but bloodthirsty murderers and agitators.
More than anything, he was furious at this little bitch of a princess who foiled all his plans one by one. Although Lu Fang knew that he would have to come out of hiding sooner or later, he'd hoped to get a little more time. The specter of a war between the two most powerful nations in the world was now dismissed, dashed. So were his hopes of seeing the people turn against Kuei, powerless to protect them from the enemy and defend their interests.
Lady Mai hadn't seemed surprised, nor unduly moved, when Lu Fang, bubbling with suppressed anger, had come to tell her about Zuko's new fiancée. This alliance exposed him to the eyes of the whole Kingdom as a traitor, as a troublemaker. While he had already rallied many people to his cause and stirred up anti-Kuei sentiment in half of the Earth Kingdom regions, Ba Sing Se was still far from ready to renounce his king. It must be said that the legendary city never had to suffer from the yoke the Fire Nation imposed on other lands for years. Not before the coup orchestrated by the little whore. Their trust in Kuei hadn't had time to be damaged too much.
"How clever of her!" the future ex-Fire Lady sneered. "A little girl! Thus, she'll have all the time she needs to seduce Zuko and take my place on the throne and in his bed. I guess you must be upset, Lu Fang, all your beautiful plan crumbles."
So it was Azula's idea. The Fire Lady herself had recognized her signature. But Lu Fang was not the kind of man who let himself down so easily. Certainly, the princess had unmasked him: he was now actively sought everywhere, in the Fire Nation AND in the Earth Kingdom. His only allies at the Caldera were weakened by the sentence that weighed on them. It was up to Lu Fang to do all the work, obviously. You are never better served than by yourself, he reminded.
The idea of this mudslide had come to him during a dream. Lu Fang was not a believer, but this dream, unlike any he had had before, had struck him with the force of a revelation. Zuko would have no choice but to move here. At first, taking advantage of his absence to attack and take the palace seemed the most obvious plan. But it seemed reckless now that the Fire Lord had the support of his and Kuei's armies. Plus, there was Azula. Together, these two seemed unbeatable. Ever since she regained influence over her brother, the princess had been making life difficult for Lu Fang. If this race for power had amused him at first, he was getting tired of it. There was no more time to waste. The flame of protest in the Fire Nation had to be rekindled before it completely died out. It was necessary to act quickly as long as the Avatar was far away and the Sons of Agni still had followers. The measures Zuko took against the fanatics were enough to cool the less convinced one's ardors.
The best weapon Lu Fang now had at his disposal was Zuko's angry, emotional and hot temper. Lu Fang would not attack frontally. When you face an adversary like the Fire Nation princess, you have to act more subtly, and know your enemy well.
Fortunately, he had the perfect person with him. No one knew the royal siblings better than the young woman brooding in a cell several feet below.
And despite her impassive face when he told her that Zuko had divorced her and planned to marry another girl, he had sensed by the way her heart had suddenly stopped beating that she was deeply hurt.
Nothing is more dreadful than the devastating wrath of a broken-hearted woman, Lu Fang considered.
He returned his attention to the desolate landscape that stretched before him as far as the eye could see. One day, perhaps, so would he sit on the heights of the Caldera and let himself be lulled by the distant lamentations of the survivors, desperately seeking their loved ones buried under an impenetrable layer of earth, the towers of the palace emerging from this disaster like the headstones of a cemetery.
Azula didn't want to get up.
The sun was already high in the sky and the chorus of dawn had passed for a good hour. The blackbird and the chaffinch had already returned to their daily occupations and the song thrush had long since ceased its singing exercises.
Azula had counted their song one by one, rattling in her head the order of the little feathered performers her mother used to make her recite each morning: blackbird, house robin, wren, tawny owl, chaffinch, warbler...
Of all her mother's fancies, her passion for birdsong and small animals in general was perhaps the most incomprehensible. Closely followed by her taste for embroidery to which she had desperately tried to initiate a refractory little princess. Mother had almost succeeded in converting Zuko to this nonsense.
Azula would rather climb trees, shoot birds with a slingshot, or, when her firebending allowed her to strike with enough precision, touch them with a jet of flame from her fingertips. Mom had surprised her one day and had turned pale with indignation. Azula still remembered the stinging punishment she had inflicted on her that day. It was the first time Mom had raised her hand to her. Ursa was a patient and gentle woman and to be completely honest, Azula could count on the fingers of one hand the times her mother had beated her. But one thing was certain: never had her fine fingers adorned with rings fallen on Zuko's cheek.
Father would hit her. A multitude of times. Zuko didn't know, but Ozai had molested his beloved daughter far more than his hated son. Yet Azula was unable to remember what it felt like. While the feel of Mom's palm on her plump six-year-old cheeks had never quite faded. Sometimes it seemed to her that it still burned.
"You little monster!" she said in a high-pitched voice. "What did I do to earn such a cruel daughter?"
Slumped on her stomach in her bed, legs entangled in her sheets, Azula put a hand to her cheek. Would she feel the ghost of Ursa's finger there one last time?
Mom was gone for good. Without making a sound, like that, one morning, evanescent like her dear swallows whose fleeting flight she loved so much.
She hadn't said goodbye.
Azula didn't notice immediately. It was after two or three days that she understood why she felt this great coldness in her chest, this emptiness in her heart. In vain she had waited for her for two days. Then she had to make up his mind.
She had to hide her pain. The others wouldn't have understood. They would have called her crazy again if she had confessed to them the cause of her grief. It wouldn't have been so hard not to think about it if she could have consoled herself in Zuzu's arms.
But now the traitor was gone too, he had left her there as one gets rid of an object or a pet that has become cumbrous. The void he had left in her chest was at least as cold as the bed where she was forced to sleep alone.
It had been five days. Five days! He who had promised to come back quickly! And of course, she had no news! What did he need to stay a week there? The trip itself lasted less than a day in a balloon! Azula was consumed with anguish. What if something had happened to Zuzu? Would they warn her?
What had her brother discovered there? What if he found something that threatened the beautiful projects they had fomented together? And what if everything were to put an end to the bright future she was working hard to built for them?
Azula buried her face in the pillow and stifled a furious scream. If she'd had the courage, she would have asphyxiate herself. It was all she deserved.
Azula had been indulgent with herself for too long now. Too long had she let her heart insult her intelligence, her emotions guide her actions.
If she had confided in Ty Lee, Azula knew she would have told her that it was love. Her friend knew an insane number of quotes, each more insipid than the next, about the reasons of the heart, or how love blinds its victims... or something like that... Azula sighed in annoyance every time Ty Lee spouted such nonsense.
Ty Lee was right about one thing though: Azula had lost herself over the past few years. She had forgotten the essential, allowed herself to be blinded. She let her failure of a brother establish his empire in her heart, bruised by the departure of her mother, by the betrayal of Mai and Ty Lee and by the fear that Father inspired in her. It was high time for her numb spirit to awake.
Make up your mind! she berated herself. Zuzu abandoned you. That's why he's not coming back.
This attack in the east was almost a godsend for Zuko, the opportunity he was waiting for to finally get rid of her.
It was too good that he treated her with such kindness when they came back from Ember Island. That's why he had listened to her, that he accepted her in his bed even after the fiasco that had been the last night of their stay. Zuko was just biding his time.
He had used her and her mind to regain full power, now what?
Maybe he was the one who organized this little trip to the east to escape your clutches? A jubilant voice hissed in her head. Maybe he went to find the Avatar? Or Uncle Iroh? Or Mother? He's kept that medallion all this time: he probably knows where to find her! Or else he figured out your role in Shyu's murder and he's running away from you.
"No! Shut up!" she replied, realizing too late that she was speaking aloud. "Zuko is loyal to me! He will never betray me again: he would not dare!"
A mocking silence was her only response.
If only she could have been sure: some news, a clue?
They never said anything to her! Master Shin, whom Zuko had appointed as the princess' guardian in his absence, refused to tell her a word about this case.
"This information is classified ''secret-defence. The Fire Lord has forbidden us to tell you about it. You are no longer the Crown Princess. You are bound by the same rules as any courtier. Now, please excuse me, Madam, I have to work."
There was a time when Azula would have made him swallow his stupid beard to punish his insolence. But she had to contain herself. She had to, for her and for Zuko. Maybe she was worrying for nothing? Real problems were probably really keeping him there. Azula really wanted to believe it.
The time was approaching when they would reign together. She was already almost his mistress –except for the sex– she thought bitterly. Before he left, she was sure he would soon be hers. All hers. Now that they were finally rid of the old goats of the Council, all that remained was to deal with the fanatics roaming the capital and that bastard Lu Fang. After that, no one would dare to stand between them. And she would give him a glimpse of heaven.
Azula had spent the past few weeks educating herself. In her trunk slept the shameful books she had stolen from Ozai's old harem. Those who detailed, with supporting illustrations, how to seduce and satisfy a man for sure.
These books made surge conflicting emotions in her. A mixture of arousal and disgust she couldn't tell anyone, not even Ty Lee. They had be useful to fuel her lies though, when she told her friend about the fiery nights she spent with the Fire Lord. To tell the truth, Azula was ashamed of it. But she had to learn. She didn't want to disappoint her brother when the time would come to offer herself to him. Not after having aroused his desire so much.
It didn't matter that he had doubts. It was in Zuko's nature to be fearful. He wouldn't get away with it: he had sworn his loyalty to Azula, had promised her a place on his right on the throne and she intended to take it. It didn't matter that he was plotting against her. He had opened her his bed. One day, a little more vulnerable than usual, or a little more worried, he would seek solace with her.
She would let him enjoy her body as he pleased.
This time, she would be careful not to be cowardly, unlike the last time. She would overcome her own coy virgin's fears. It was inexcusable: a princess had to be ready for her wedding night. At twenty, Azula was old enough to know that.
During the endless engagement period with Kuei's daughter, Azula would have plenty of time to convince him that he didn't need any other woman in his bed.
Azula rolled over on her mattress and laid on her back, her eyes staring at the crimson canopy above her. Did Zuko miss her? Did he also regret the warmth of her body in his sheets? Was he consoling himself with another woman at this very moment? The thought sent an irrational wave of jealousy through her and she had to suppress a groan of rage again.
It gave her the energy to push the sheets aside and get out of bed. She winced as the movement strained the feeble bones of her pelvis. If only she had known earlier where Taïma hid her supply of poppy milk! She would not have achieved this pitiful performance in front of her brother when it had been necessary to prove to him that she could accompany him.
Frustration crept over her and she had to pause for a moment. Sitting on her bed, she tried to control her breath. It had been months since she had meditated or taken the time to focus on her breathing. Though, it was the basis of firebending.
Certainly her attacks remained spectacular in their power and inventiveness. But it was like her body no longer obeyed her. It seemed to her that she moved with the heaviness of an earthbender. Ty Lee's acrobatics made her drool with envy: seeing her friend fly and spin in the air created a tight feeling in her chest every time. What was she still worth without her title? Without her incredible fighting skills? And above all, what was she worth without Zuko's trust?
Although it had been her idea from the start to renounce her status as Crown Princess, that did not make the condescending looks of the courtiers any more bearable, too happy to see her humiliated, relegated to the rank of simple Lady of the Court. If at least Zuko had named her his favorite, it would have consoled her and given her some prestige in the eyes of others. But far from that, the mere idea of their relationship disgusted them.
Azula knew that the rumor had spread widely that the princess had recently been warming the Fire Lord's bed. Yet they took every precaution to meet in secret. It was all the more frustrating that nothing inappropriate ever happened behind the curtains of his canopy. Azula had tried to be satisfied with the crumbs of tenderness he had been kind enough to grant her with. She supposed that after what had happened on Ember Island, she was already lucky that he would give her a place in his bed. Not that she really left him the choice though...
Azula finally stood up and immediately felt dizzy. She curses herself for once again abusing of the wine stolen from Zuko's storerooms. If at least she could take advantage of his absence, she was not going to deprive herself. But of course, even the little pleasure she got from it ended up being tarnished: the mornings were rough.
If Zuko comes back, she promised herself, I won't touch a glass of wine anymore.
It wasn't the first time she made such promises. Wine was all that kept her away from madness. Of course, there was the treatment. But the medicine Taïma gave her did not protect her from the oppressive grief that weighed permanently on her chest, nor from the fear that never left her. The wine seemed to soften her troubles and kept at bay the voices that pressed at the door of her mind to mock her misery. She had found it almost by accident shortly after her return from the asylum, when, tortured by her invisible companions, she had tried to stun herself to find sleep. `At the time, Taïma was always struggling to find the right dosage. During her dinners with Zuko and Mai (when she deigned to go there), she had noticed that the alcohol that a zealous servant poured into her glass made the ordeal less tricky. The alcohol coated her with a sense of unreality that had nothing to do with the horrific world into which her sick mind plunged her. Paradoxically, she felt as if the beverage kept her in the real world. By some inexplicable miracle, the wine attenuated the sound of the voices, she felt powerful, held the illness at bay. Until morning... After that, it was not uncommon, during social gatherings and dinners, to see the princess with a glass full of wine in her hand. Taima disapproved. Zuko disapproved. And who knows what Father would have said?
Shame added to her misfortune.
The day before, she had expressly asked Ty Lee to leave her alone, pretending great fatigue and the onset of a migraine. But her friend was not fooled. She knew that in less than half an hour, Ty Lee would come knocking on the door, force her to get dressed, insist to comb her hair and put her makeup, and, finally, force her to take her medicine.
Azula was glad that her friend was here. She no longer talked about going to Kyoshi Island and seemed determined to reside permanently at the palace as long as the Fire Lord tolerated her presence. Even more than wine, Ty Lee was a valuable remedy for depression.
Just then, as Azula moved slowly and with difficulty to the bathroom, there was a knock on the door.
"Come in!" she shouted.
Ty Lee shyly appeared and greeted her with a kind smile.
"There you are," Azula said simply in greeting.
Seeing that Azula was struggling to move – her muscles were always stiffer when getting up, especially after a drunken night out – Ty Lee held out a helping hand to her but the princess refused.
When she returned from the bathroom with a fresher complexion, dressed in a short-sleeved tunic and pants, her hair gathered in a half ponytail, Ty Lee who was waiting for her, sitting on her bed, asked her:
"What do you want to do today?"
Azula came back to sit next to her and immediately felt discouraged and sad. The anguish came to invite itself in her heart as soon as she thought of Zuko.
"Nothing," she sighed.
"Azula," Ty Lee whispered softly, wrapping an arm around her hunched shoulders. "I know you miss Zuko. But you can't spend your days alone here brooding over depressing thoughts."
"He doesn't want me, Ty Lee! He claims that he loves me, that I matter to him, but he took the first opportunity to throw me aside!"
"He just wants to protect you. It wasn't safe for you to go there."
"What?" Azula hissed, pulling away from her friend as if she had burned her. "Do you think I'm weak, too? That I'm no longer good for anything?"
"Enough, Azula! Stop getting upset when someone mentions your physical condition!"
The tone had been so sharp, so harsh, that Azula found herself at a loss for word. Never had Ty Lee addressed her so abruptly. She scowled. If even Ty Lee started treating her like a simple commoner… She tolerated her familiarity but not her disregard for her rank.
"You had a serious fall of several feet! I saw you fall and I saw your dislocated body on the rocks." There she paused, giving her features an expression of great pain, as if it were the worst memory of her life. Azula let out a disdainful snort. As if that could be true! "You may not realize it, but it's a miracle you survived with so little damage! Not all seriously injured people can say the same."
Azula quickly turned her head towards her. There was something unusually hard in Ty Lee's gaze. The reference to Kojiro was too clear.
The princess often wondered how Ty Lee really felt when she thought of the young man whose life Azula had ruined. She guessed that beneath the obvious guilt—after all, she was the one who had insisted on introducing them to each other— she hid also a deep resentment, perhaps even a real revulsion for what Azula did. They never talked about it. Just as they never mentioned that terrible scene in the training yard, when Azula had almost...
Ty Lee must have seen the pain and shame in Azula's eyes, for she immediately softened.
"Azula, you have been through some very difficult moments over the past few years. But life is smiling at you again. Zuko loves you like you wanted to, right?"
"Yes… that's it…" Azula couldn't help answering, her voice quivering with bitterness.
"Azula," Ty Lee tried in a tentative voice. "Is… is there something you haven't told me? About you and Zuko?"
Azula looked up at her friend. Ty Lee's cheeks were a little rosy and her gray eyes shone with anxiety. So she knew. She had guessed for the lies. Azula couldn't say she was surprised. She had pushed her mystifications so far that she could no longer find herself credible anymore. She could yell at Ty Lee, force her out of the room, threaten her for her vile accusations. Or she could tell her the truth.
"May be…maybe…I exaggerated some things I told you…"
Ty Lee said nothing, just waiting, patiently. Her friendly features seemed to encourage Azula to continue.
"Zuko and I never… We almost did on Ember Island…but I screwed up again. He was drunk. As for me... I wasn't at my best. We both really wanted to and then… He started touching me. I was scared, like a poor idiot. After that, he came to his senses…he didn't want to do it anymore. And now he doesn't want to hear about it."
And before she could prevent them, tears suddenly rolled down on her cheeks. Her headache increased and she buried her face in her hands. She let go when Ty Lee approached her and hugged her tight.
"He said...he said..." she mumbled between sobs. "He spoke the word! He said it was incest. That it was wrong, prohibited by law. That we could never be together. Oh, I know what you're thinking, Ty Lee. Don't pretend! You think he's right!"
"No...Yes. Well, I don't know. I don't like seeing you unhappy. But most of all, I worry about you. I went into town when you were gone. And I heard a lot of things. Really Azula, I don't know if you realize what people are saying about you, but these rumors about your relationship... Everyone seems convinced there's something between you... and even they make a joke of it, deep down they don't like it. Not at all."
Azula couldn't hold back the bitter laugh that escaped her lips.
"Finally, the only people who know that there is nothing inappropriate between Zuzu and me are... Zuzu and me! How ironic, right?"
"You can't say that there is nothing, can you? He lets you sleep in his bed, doesn't he?"
"Yes, but..."
Ty Lee frowned. Azula tried to explain herself:
"Some times when I came to his room, he was not there. I waited for him several times, all night. When I understood that he would no longer come, I went to sleep… elsewhere."
"Where?" Ty Lee ventured, probably aware that curiosity made her far too indiscreet.
But Azula didn't answer. It was degrading enough to talk about Zuko's rejection. She wasn't going to tell her friend about the nights she spent crying on her mother's dusty pillow, was she? She still risked a look at her friend.
Ty Lee looked embarrassed, deeply troubled. Azula knew this expression well. She knew that at any moment, Ty Lee was going to explode and confess something. And she was right. Azula knew people well.
"What's wrong, Ty Lee? You have to tell me if you know something! It's about Zuko, isn't it?"
"There's something I didn't tell you! I'm so sorry but I didn't have the courage! I couldn't find the words..."
Ty Lee buried her head in her hands, shoulders shaking with sobs. Great! Azula thought Now she would have to console her friend. But her exasperation was quickly driven away by the dull anguish she felt dawning within her. Whatever Ty Lee was about to tell her, it was clear that it wouldn't be a pleasant story.
"Tell me, Ty Lee," she encouraged her gently, putting a hand on her shoulder. "I want to know everything. I can hear it."
Fifteen minutes later, Ty Lee finally managed to approach the fury to which her story had given birth.
Curled up on the floor of her room, exhausted from sobs and screams of rage, disheveled, Azula seemed unable to fight her grief any longer. The remnants of her charred curtains, now a vulgar heap of ashes that still smoldered at the foot of the bed, spread an acrid scent in the room.
Ty Lee thought it was a miracle that no one had heard them. And at the same time a little worrying. If no one came when the princess roared like a furious lioness, one could freely wonder about the vigilance of the guards and of Shin who was supposed to scrupulously watch over her.
Azula's ragged breath still filled the room, but she looked exhausted and Ty Lee, kneeling next to her on the carpet, thought it was now safe to speak again.
"Azula…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you by saying that. I know it's hard for you. But it's probably not that bad."
A furious growl answered her and Ty Lee jumped out of the way to avoid the royal wrath. Her hands accidentally landed on a piece of broken glass and she stifled a painful exclamation. She glanced down at her bloody palm. It didn't look that bad. She would deal with it later. There was a princess to calm down and she desperately needed her.
Ty Lee was already regretting her reckless admission and inwardly cursing her loose tongue. Was it the subconscious urge to punish Zuko for breaking her friend's heart that had prompted her to speak? Or the fact that Azula has, for once, given up lying? Ty Lee valued honesty. She was that kind of person. So when Azula, the queen of lies, confided in her… Ty Lee couldn't help but release the truth she had been hidding for so long. Her apologies didn't matter. The result was there in front of her, terrifying and deadly.
And Azula didn't know the worst. Ty Lee hadn't told her about Hachiko. She hadn't told her that Zuko vented his frustration by fucking his sister's perfect double. Maybe she should? It could be a source of comfort for the poor in love-woman who was consumed with jealousy in front of her? But she couldn't put Hachiko in this situation. The poor girl had nothing to do with it.
"How..." rumbled the threatening voice of Azula, who seemed to finally be able to speak again. "How could you hide it from me? How can you say it's not that bad?"
"Men do that all the time, Azula!" she hastened to reply. "Even married men, even those who love their wives! And kings are no exception. Your father had a lot of mistresses, didn't he? He also made girls come..."
"But he wasn't sneaking off to fuck them in some seedy brothel in the working-class neighborhoods! He wasn't that pathetic little...little..."
"Zuko only did this to protect you. Mai was gone, you understand… He didn't want to hurt you. If you had learned that he received girls at the palace, how would you have reacted?"
"I would have killed them with my own hands!" the princess shouted, her voice cracking hysterically. And Ty Lee's heart stopped beating for a moment. Agni, what had she done? She was suddenly deeply relieved that Zuko was several hundred miles away from this murderous rage.
Azula sat up on her knees, she lifted her head to the ceiling and took several deep breaths. After a while, she got up, dusted off her outfit. She disappeared for a moment in the bathroom and came back with a leather satchel in which she quickly threw some belongings. Stepping over to the mirror at the back of the room, she casually walked over the shattered pieces of glass that crunched under her leather boots. There, she fixed her hair and Ty Lee saw her usual haughty and proud look gradually gaining her graceful features.
Ty Lee had always admired how quickly Azula could regain control over her emotions. This time though, it didn't bode well.
"Do you want my opinion, Ty? I think Zuzu has had a little too much to deal with lately. So much pressure, it's not good for kings. It is time for me to intervene. If I want to reign by his side, I must take my part."
And before Ty Lee had time to answer, she left the mirror and walked with a confident step towards the secret passage hidden by the large tapestry hanging on the wall.
After a few seconds of hesitation, Ty Lee decided to follow her. If Azula had to do something stupid and thoughtless, better be with her.