Chapter Fourteen
Ed didn't like being at home. He was spending more time away from the plain, suburban house as he got older, and that made him come to this revelation. It wasn't because it wasn't comfortable, or it held an odd aura about it. No, there wasn't anything wrong with the house, but the same couldn't be said for its occupants.
Not to say Ed didn't like this family. It's just after all they had put him through, he couldn't help himself but hold some degree of ill will towards them. It was a small part of him that danced in the back of his mind that he put significant effort into suppressing. That effort was only amplified the more he was around them.
He knew both his mother and his father were proud of him for making it to college. They were happy that he wanted to do it himself, and he knew that they carried some degree of guilt around with them for the way they treated him when he was younger and before anything was diagnosed. He even knew that his sister was the way she was for her own reasons. Wanting to fit in, wanting to be something she wasn't, and overall going along with the crowd to the point of neglecting her brother at best, and flat out abusing him at worst. But Ed knew that he wasn't the best example of a brother, or of a son, in the world. So, he apologized for them and forgave them for what they had done to him in the past.
But no matter how much forgiveness he allowed them, and no matter the number of excuses he made for them, there was still a piece of him that grew sad when he thought of them. The way they had treated him, the things they had said to him, the way they held Sarah in such high regard over him, and how she took advantage of that fact for everything it was worth.
Ed wasn't the type to hate or hold grudges, so when he lamented on the past it was done so with more a fleeting feeling of what could have been. How much better his life could have been. How much better it could be. How he could have felt like his family understood him and didn't look at him like there was something wrong with him. Like he was a problem.
Despite all of this Ed did love Christmas. It was his favorite holiday, after Halloween of course, and it was something he looked forward to every year. It was one of the few times where that stuff didn't matter because people were at their best. Everyone being just a few degrees cheerier. It was something Ed loved.
The Claymation specials, the holiday themed movies that warmed the heart, and the general feeling of togetherness it brought about. Even Sarah let up most years, and instead of being worried about their son, his mother and his father would watch the aforementioned movies with him, and they would all smile and laugh together. Sure, the presents were cool. But, what Ed loved most about this time of year were the memories made. Things that could never be taken away from him.
He sat in his room and flicked through the channels of his old hand-me-down TV. It was late for everyone else, and they had long since gone to sleep. But for a college student, the night was just starting. He slouched down into his dilapidated recliner, its ability to recline had broken years ago, and wished that there was something worthwhile on.
Maybe that wasn't the right way to put it. The quality wasn't a problem, Ed was a man who favored quantity in the field of entertainment. What he really wished for was for someone worthwhile to enjoy it with. He missed May. The way she'd watch movies with him and be absorbed into them just like he was. She'd ask questions and show genuine curiosity in something Ed cared about, and she even cracked corny jokes like he did between scenes or after some atrocious dialogue or plot development. He liked watching movies with her, and now that he wouldn't be able to for some time, he hated it.
He sighed to himself and fished around in his pocket for his phone. He glanced over the lock screen and confirmed what he already knew, there was nothing. He dropped it on his lap and sighed again as he continued his never ending journey through the channels, even though he had already looped through them multiple times.
There was a knock, a tapping to put it better, at the window that peeked out into the backyard at ground level. That could only mean one thing. A smile spread across his face as he raced over to it and unlatched the lock. Double D smiled back and waved at him from the other side and once it was open, and the arctic chill blew in from the outside, he slipped down into Ed's room.
Double D was the only one who could use this entrance anymore. It had been their most frequent method of entry in their childhoods and after growing the others couldn't fit. His petite frame offered no resistance the way it did for the larger Ed or the more filled out Eddy. He dropped onto the concrete floor and brushed the snow off of his jacket and his winter boots.
"Apologies for the unannounced visit, Ed. I was just home alone and wanted to see if you were still awake."
"Sure thing, Double D!" Ed grinned. "Oh, do you want to watch something?" he asked gesturing over to the TV.
"That sounds wonderful, Ed."
Ed leaped onto the cushiony chair, giggling as he did so, while Double D preferred to sit on the stool that sat at Ed's desk. A myriad of models and miniatures were spread across its surface, along with an assortment of paints and small brushes. Double D was always amazed by Ed's ability to put together, paint, and detail the little things, and how he did so with an expert's attention to detail. It was something the smarter teen had tried and failed in the past. His talents belonged more to his studies than artistic pursuits.
"There's a Santa slasher movie on. It's a good one." Ed nodded, "I can't wait to watch it with May."
"You and May seem to be getting on quite well." Double D noted, happy for his friend.
"You bet! She's a lot of fun and she loves the movies that I like too."
"They are a bit of an…acquired taste." Double D wasn't much of a film buff, and the movies he'd watched with Ed and Eddy hadn't managed to change that, to say the least.
"She's a lot of fun." Ed repeated with his eyes full of wonder at the thought of the blonde haired Kanker.
"It's so odd that we've come so far with them in such a short amount of time. To think, these were the same girls that used to chase around the cul-de-sac mere years ago." Double D laughed.
Ed laughed too, "We used to be so scared of them. Remember?"
"Indeed, but now you and May are friends, Marie and I are getting along much better, and I'm sure you're aware of Eddy's date tonight."
The shortest of the Eds had made his plans with Lee no secret to his friends. Not this time. He had been vocal and proud of it the moment she had said yes, and nothing could get him to shut up about it. Not that either of his friends minded. They were happy for him, and so long as everything worked out and they didn't fall back into their old routine of arguing and fighting nonstop, it would only serve to make both their lives better.
"The lucky duck." Ed said, lost in the horror movie that flashed on the TV.
"I suppose so. Denying his feelings like he had been doing for so long only compounded the animosity he felt. It's good that he's accepting both himself and her."
"Whatever you just said, Double D." Ed agreed. It wasn't that he didn't feel the same way, or that he didn't understand what his friend was saying. It was just that the movie was getting to the good parts, and he was more interested in watching Santa murder someone with a giant candy cane than Double D's ramblings.
Double D knew enough about his friends to pick up on their little ticks, so he had no difficulty realizing that Ed was getting invested more with the movie. He'd learned long ago that interrupting or disturbing Ed's cinematic enjoyment was a bad idea, so he relented in his own musing. Ed was a great listener and someone Double D enjoyed talking to, but he knew the lovable lug would only grow shorter and shorter with him if he kept pushing. So instead, Double D put on a smile and watched the screen himself, enjoying the schlock for everything it was worth. Which even Ed would admit wasn't a lot.
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