Joker stretched in his cot. *crik crik crak* He felt his back pop in several places. Gods, who would they let him kill around here to have a decent bed? Guess there'd be only one way to find out.. heehee
He bounced up and walked over to the sink. Any moment now, a bit of water would trickle out of the hole just above the sink and he would use the awful-tasting tacky toothpaste with his finger-brush. While waiting, he also kept a watch out for anyone to walk by so he could get some food... If that's what you could call it these days...
*TAP, TAP, TAP*
Joker turned around to face a guard tapping his nightstick on the glass door. "JOKER! Be ready for your shower in 10 minutes!" Before Joker could respond, the guard walked away quickly, like he couldn't get away fast enough. But just as Joker was about to say something -frightfully clever, of course- he heard the trickle of water coming from the hole in the wall.
"NO!" Joker stuck his brush under just as the water stopped. "AHHGH! YoooouuUUU IDIOT! You made me miss it!" He looked around at something to throw at the glass door, to destroy. His ire was immediately stoked but everything in the room was cemented or nailed down. He growled in frustration, slamming his fists onto the glass door. He wasn't happy. He was looking forward to this guard being on his shower detail...
~10 minutes Later~
"Oh, rubber ducky... you're the one! You make bath time SO MUCH FUN! HAHAHAaa!" Joker sang as he washed under the spray of the luke-warm water, wiggling his bare buttocks side to side. This was the best luxury the joint offered. The Asylum's shower facility wasn't the most charming. It was a dingy square tiled room, had 5 shower heads in it, although they rarely let more than one inmate shower at the same time. It was stained here and there, some water stains, some mud ...some blood. Joker had fun turning on all the shower heads hoping to waste the hot water so it would be ice cold for anyone else who had to shower that day.
Sadly, since the guard who's head he had wanted to crush between his hands wasn't there, he tried to find amusement. He looked at the guard who had his shock rod, ready to use. He hadn't seen this one around much. More fun.
"So, are you just gonna stare at my backside all day?" Joker said feigning modesty, then cackling.
"I'm not." Is all the unknown guard said, defensively.
"Really? Oh, guess I was wrong... not that I could blame you-Ahaha!"
"Just keep showering, you got 5 minutes left."
"Aw, someone feelin' a bit down? Not surprised though, I can smell the whiskey from here. Havin' troubles? Maybe ol' Uncle Jay can help ya out.."
"Sure. I bet you would just wave your magic wand and make everything better? Pssh," the guard shook his head disbelievingly.
"Well, I have been told it's a rather nice wan- eh, that's not the point. The point is, I'm a business man first, psychopath second," Joker smiled, still scrubbing his green hair with both hands, now facing the guard unabashed.
The guard looked confused, staring at his expression trying to discern if Joker was lying. He shook his head. "No way. You'd just kill me. I'm not that dumb."
"How dare you, sir!" Joker sounding deeply offended. "I only kill about half of my employees! HA! Besides, I'm in the market for something much more low key.."
"That right?" the guard responded. He stood there, continuing to stare at Joker, clearly unsure if the clown was messing with him or really offering him a job. Joker may be a maniac, but he knew security guard take-home pay wasn't much, and he must need the money. Everyone in Gotham needed the money.
"Come, come, I haven't got all day. Tic toc, tic toc now..." Joker's lips turned upward into a dangerous grin. Smile or not, he looked terrifying. It made the guard shift his weight unnervingly. Almost as if his body were weighing his options. Must really be in a pickle.
"..What's the cut?"
"OOooOOh, are we interested, then?" Joker stood under the flowing water now, letting the soap rinse down his hair and body as he analyzed the intoxicated guard. "Tell ya what, chum, you be a pair of eyes and ears for me, run a few errands and answer directly to me, and I'll make sure you're properly taken care of..."
The guard lifted his protective visor and smirked at Joker, considering. He had a scar that ran from the top of his right eyebrow to the middle of his right cheek. His eye looked to have taken on damage, too.
"Alright. So what's this job you got?" the guard put the shock rod away in his belt.
Apparently, you ARE that dumb. Joker smiled widely, let out a loud laugh and slapped his knee. "Splendid! What's your name, buddy-boy!"
"Boles. Frank Boles."
Half an hour later Joker was considering what a productive morning it had been. New hired help, looking devilishly handsome for his doctor and he got a handful of laughs at hearing some of the inmates whine and moan about the cold showers they'd experienced today. One being Riddler. One guard was leading him down the hall, his hair still a bit wet, but his skin was all goose-bumped and shivering. HA! As the he walked by Joker's cell, Nygma shot the clown a look of pure venom. Joker had responded with "Relax, Eddie, you just need to chill! Oh, oops! HAHAHAhahah!"
Joker was standing close to his glass door and looked around, seeing if any nurses or guards were near. Nope. He was bored inmates around his cells weren't chatty at the moment. Ivy was at the showers now. That'll be good! Tetch was in session with his shrink, and all Zsasz was doing was rocking back and forth on his cot saying "..and cutting and cutting and cutting.." over and over. It had a nice lulling affect to it. All the rest were either in the cafeteria or common room.
It was no wonder that Arkham Asylum had so many successful patient escapes as a rep. A few by him.
That's when Joker heard the sound boots coming toward him. Speaking of escaping... He pressed his face up against the glass to see who. Why it was Frankie! Looked as if he was heading out of the corridor. He let out a low laugh when Officer Boles walked by his cell and slightly nodded in his direction, signaling to Joker that he was about to perform the first part his job. Boles had better play his part well or he'd give him EXACTLY what he'd deserve! Either way, it worked for him.
Just as he reclined back onto his cot, something made him smile.
"Don't touch me, get off of me. No! I KNOW he did it! HE was the first to shower! JOKER! YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY TO SHOWER IN FREEZING WATER?! I'M GOING TO SQUEEZE THE AIR OUT OF YOUR LUNGS AND FEED YOU TO MY BABIES!"
Soon, two nurses ran past his cell toward the commotion.
Ivy was struggling against two guards who were trying to put her back into her cell. "Let me go! He wasted water! That water could have gone to my babies, they need me! They're DYING without me! You pathetic meatsack, let me- No! NO! I'll show you who's really in charge! You can't stop Mother Na- No!... doooon't.. I... I.." *THUD* Ivy had passed out, slumping over a guard after one of the nurses sedated her.
Joker had started laughing at the part about his lungs! "AHAHAHAHAhahaa! Who knew the vine lady had so much spunk in her? Heheheehehee."
The nurses walked back to the station, one gave him a disappointed look, the other, a look of annoyance, as they walked by. But Joker just threw up his hands. "Wasn't my fault.. it was the rubber duckys! HAHAHAHahahaA!" Joker held his stomach from laughing so hard, then wiped his eyes which had begun to water.
Harleen had arrived to work a little late but no one seemed to notice. She had woken up with the realization that she hadn't mentioned her request to have Joker rescheduled for the common room to Dr. Leland the day before. The panic made her clumsy and she wasted unnecessary time getting ready before heading out.
As she walked through the entrance of the penitentiary, she saw everyone was on edge. Guards, nurses, doctors. She made the immediate right into the dining hall, poured herself a cup of hot tea, grabbed a bagel and cream cheese packet and stood in line to pay. The cashier was Miss Linda who was nice to everyone here, even the patients.
"Good morning, Harleen, honey, just the coffee and bagel?" She greeted her with her wrinkled eyes and smile. She had a faint Texan accent, pink lipstick and a jolly attitude to boot.
"Yes, just this. Thanks." Seeing that no one else was around, she asked, "Um, Miss Linda, did something happen this morning?"
Miss Linda looked up, "They didn't tell you? It's the Joker. Apparently he pulled a stunt that made a lot of patients rowdy. Everyone's a little miffed at him, if ya ask me. They oughtta keep these people in here occupied better, wouldn't have these problems and the like."
"Oh no," Harleen said, feeling responsible. "I just got in, looks like I'm in for a long day. I should go see to it. Thank you again."
"Have a good one, honey."
She walked out of the penitentiary and onto the grounds back toward her office in the Arkham Mansion. She was glad she wore pants and comfortable shoes today, it was chilly outside. The clouds were darker than they were earlier and the wind were picking up a bit.
Looks like rain, Harleen thought. She opened the Mansion's large, ornate doors, stepped through the main hall and scanned her badge as she went. She was almost to her door when she was stopped.
"Dr. Quinzel?" Great. It was Dr. Leland, of course. No doubt to tell her of how her patient acted out of conduct and what she felt Harleen should do about it.
"Dr. Leland, hello. I heard about this morning."
"Good. No need to tell you that you are to pay extra close attention today. If this behavior continues, he will be barred from the common room. These.. pranks.. are not to be tolerated."
"Yes, of course, thank you. Um, speaking of which, I meant to ask yesterday when he can be scheduled for the common room again," Harleen said. She wanted to get in her office and set her stuff down. She was hungry and she knew all of this already!
"Eh," Dr. Leland looked hesitant. "We normally do not permit back-to-back common room visits. This is to make sure that other patients have access to the common room, as well as other reasons, of course.
Harleen simply nodded. She was getting to the point of irritable. She just wanted to eat her freakin bagel!
"Right. Well, I can speak to Officer Cash about it more in depth in a bit. I just need to set my things down, get started for the day.." she trailed off, hoping Dr. leland would get the hint.
"Of course, good luck, Dr. Quinzel," Dr. Leland smiled, nodding a little. Harleen smiled and made to open her door when- "One more thing," Dr. Leland prompted.
Harleen sighed heavily, turning around. "How are you doing with Joker's case file? You aren't too overwhelmed, are you?"
Harleen automatically felt her core go cold but she kept a smile on her face. "Not at all. Thank you again," and she moved quickly into her office and closed the door, slumping against it. Really?! You went out of your way to tell me to do my job?! Does anyone think I'm capable?"
She needed to show them that she could handle this. That she could handle him. Scarfing down her bagel and bringing the last of her tea with her, she headed back out to the penitentiary, assuming that Cash would be there. She'd go to the nurse's station by his cell to get a full report on what happened for her notes. She wouldn't be talking to him directly, just near him.
Boles headed toward the exit. The Joker had given him a pretty easy task for his first go-round. First he needed to locate the doc. Not hard, since she had just walked through the door he was headed toward.
He glanced back at Joker's cell to see his eyes fixed the on the blond as well. He walked up to the nurse's station, trying to find out what she knew first.
"... so he used up all the hot water for the day?" the doc asked the nurse behind the counter.
"Oh, yes he most certainly did! Now all the patients are miserable and uncooperative. Making this a helluva day." The nurse went back to the paperwork in front of her after handing the doc a sheet of Joker's schedule for the week.
Now seemed like a good time. "Excuse me, Dr. Quinzel?"
She looked up, a little surprised. No one ever talks to this broad?
"Yes?"
"I'm the guard that was assigned to take Joker down to the showers today. Frank Boles," he said smiling in introducing himself. "Look, I know everybody's pretty pissed at Joker," he ushered her away from the nurse's desk so only she could hear him, "but it's not his fault. It's mine. He just seemed so happy, having a fun shower and all. So I let him turn on the shower heads. Maybe I shouldn't have, but he's never been so upbeat before. Kept talkin' about his new doc and how he can't wait to meet her. I'm guessin' that's you, eh?"
"He talked about me?" Harleen started to blush a bit and glanced over to Joker's cell. "Well, I'm very glad that you told me what really happened and I understand wanting to help someone feel better. Thank you so much Officer Boles, I really appreciate you letting me know this."
And with that the blond walked away. Holy shit. I can't believe it worked. She bought every word of that bull. And he knew how she'd react! He walked back down the cells, some of the inmates barking insults at him. But when he looked at Joker, the clown was sitting on his cot, cross legged, looking deep in thought with his hands together in a steeple in front of him, elbows on his knees. He looked pleased, calculating, and sinister.
Not a cold day in Hell, man, he thought as he went back to doing his morning rounds. I wouldn't mess with that guy on a cold day in Hell.
Harleen had never felt this level of excitement before. Was it excitement? She wasn't sure what it was. It felt pleasing and hopeful, giddy and charged up, almost like a buzzing electricity was flowing through her limbs. She felt as if she could run a mile and not get tired, swim 50 laps and not be exhausted. She felt... alive. The Joker wanted to meet her! He was happy. SHE made him happy. This was great! She could have a real chance at helping to cure him!
Harleen had gone back to her office. The urge to walk nearer Joker's cell had been almost impossible to resist. Instead she had taken the schedule the she had received at the nurse station and been told by Officer Cash when she ran into him on the grounds outside the Arkham Mansion that Joker would be able to fit into today's schedule, although he had advised against it as well. Harleen had insisted, even laying on some of her cheerful charm to placate Cash.
Joker's file sat in front of her now at her desk. She hadn't shopped for office decor as she intended but it wasn't that important just now. She pulled out a pink notepad and began to jot down her thoughts. She would be observing Joker in just a few hours and needed to make sure that she calmed down a bit and got her mind straight before making her way back to the penitentiary.
3 Hours Later
Well, she thought she had leveled out until she stepped into the guard station. Her stomach was fluttering with anticipation like before. On the way across the grounds she had decided not to constantly jot more notes and instead devote her attention completely to observing her patient, then would write down her conclusions later.
Joker still wasn't in yet. Today's common room hour had a bit of a change up. A small man was hunching over a checker board on a table where he sat alone. His beady blue eyes peered at the pieces through stringy dark blond hair that fell limply in front of his face. This apparently didn't bother him since he made mo effort to move his hair out of his eyes. Harleen's eyes glanced at a clipboard that was hanging by the guard station door. The list of patients scheduled were on a chart and next to them were signatures of the guards who brought them in. This must be Jervis Tetch who had been brought in by a guard who signed his name with a large "W". Jervis Tetch was playing checkers by himself, moving the pieces in odd directions but it seemed to make sense to him. Every time he moved a piece he would clap or exclaim, "Oh Frabjous day!"
Johnathon Crane sat in the corner of the common room dubbed 'the library' which wasn't more than a few stacks of books. He was in a plastic chair reading a book with no title on it's cover, just a brown hardback cover. Harvey Dent was there again, sitting in the same chair as before, still flipping his coin. He looked agitated each time he flipped it and saw which side it landed on. Harleen watched for a minute, wondering what question he kept asking the coin. Was he was flipping to see if he could get up from the table that was near Tetch's? Maybe to go to the bathroom or read a book?
She shook her head slightly. Who would leave their life up to the flip of a coin? Did he flip it for every single decision in life or just the bigger decisions? And what justified big decisions? Harleen pulled her eyes away from the former district attorney. She felt a bit of sympathy for both him and his doctor. It was just then that she heard laughter. A very distinctive sort of laughter. As scary as it seemed to other people, she didn't think his laugher sounded so horrible but she couldn't deny that she found it a bit unnerving.
Joker walked in, and again, the air seemed to tense. She was amazed at the effect the Joker had on the inmates here. After his cuffs were removed he spread his arms wide as if in front of an audience.
"Ah, what a great turn out! Shorty, Harv and Spooky! Well what do ya know, let you out of confinement, did they, Johnny?" Joker's hands landed on his hips, his fists resting jauntily.
Johnathon Crane merely turned slightly toward Joker, readjusted his glasses at the bridge of his nose and curtly half nodded at Joker, his face was indifferent, almost bored.
"They did," he said factually.
"Well don't get too excited, ol' boy, you may have an expression! HA! You really should smile more..."
"I smile only when appropriate," Crane responded, face still void of emotion.
Joker continued to grin at Crane, as if he found his responses amusing. "Do tell!" he said nodding Crane on. Joker crossed his arms and listened.
"When I conduct my research, when break-throughs are discovered, then an expression such as smiling has significance. Fear is the only thing that interests me." Crane looked back over his book to find where he had left off at.
Joker opened his mouth like he was going to retort, then stopped short and shrugged. "Can't argue with that kind of logic. Haha!"
Joker's eyes then fell on Tetch and narrowed. Tetch's eyes had been glued to his new intern for some time. Joker walked up behind Tetch, his eyes rested on the back of Tetch's head. The little man's shoulders shook slightly as his body gave an involuntary shiver.
"The jabberwocky approaches... but no, he doesn't smile..no, no.." Tetch muttered, his head turning to the side to barely glimpse Joekr behind him. Joker saw the color fade down from his neck.
"See something you like, Shorts?" Joker asked, voice laced with a threatening tone.
"...I..She...Her hair.. She could be Alice... but Alice is young. She couldn't be Alice, could she? Alice? Aaalice?"
Joker bent forward so his lips were by Tetch's ear. The guards trained their weapons on Joker, waiting for what he might do. His voice, both harsh and low liek it had been dragged across gravel said, "She's my Alice. Understand?"
Jervis then seemed to squeak with worry, nodding his head incessantly and wringing his hands.
"Oh, yes, I see now, not Alice, couldn't be. Too old. Too old-too old! Oh, where is my Alice, where is she?" Jervis whined to himself.
Joker straightened up and slapped him on the back, making Jervis jump. "Good choice! I'd hate to lose my common room privileges! Ahaha!"
One of the guards had put his finger on the trigger when Joker hand made contact with Tetch, but they hadn't made a move yet. Joker walked around the table, sat down and picked up a battered deck of cards. He looked around to see all the guards still pointing their guns at him.
"Oh, lighten up, jeez. You'd think this were a hospital - HAAHAHAA!"
One of the guards lowered his weapon, but a few hissed at him to keep his guard up. They were still nervous. Not that he cared anymore, his attention was now on his new doctor. He turned his chair so he was facing directly at her. Her eyebrows furrowed a bit, probably wondering what he'd do next. She was standing by the glass, no notepad in hand, just her hands in her pockets, watching him. She must be as bored as I am... Let's see if she plays! Grinning widely, he took the deck in his hands and began to shuffle. After the third time, he fanned out all of the cards. He looked at her and presented the cards like a a magician about to do a trick. The eyebrows furrowed deeper.
"Great," he muttered, "another brilliant doctor."
He took his index finger and hovered it back and forth over the splayed cards. Her eyebrows smoothed out and she relaxed. And the light bulb goes on.
He began to slowly move his finger over the cards, after a few back-and-forth motions, she nodded her head ever so slightly. He turned his head away as if to say 'Don't show me your card!' He flipped it around in her direction to show her the card, the shoved it back in the deck and shuffled. When he pulled the card out and showed her, she nodded again, a smile playing around her lips. He turned the card over, then looked back at her.
Queen of Diamonds.
She had to admit, she was breaking the rules a teensy bit right now.
"Absolutely no contact whatsoever with the patient until you have reviewed his files for a month."
Well, what was the harm really? She was just playing a card trick game with him. No harm. Just detached rapport. She decided it was a good spot and nodded her head a bit. He showed her the card: queen of diamonds. She kept Officer Cash in her peripheral to make sure he didn't notice the game going on. Cash was discussing the behavior of the guards inside the room to another guard behind her. Recommending what sounded like 'stricter guidelines' and 'following procedure' and 'new speaker system.'
Joker showed her the same card again. Hey, he got it! Joker looked at the card and something changed. He looked back at her but it was different. He wasn't just looking at her..more through her. It felt like he was trying to x-ray her. His eyes just kept boring into hers, trying to read something there.
Calculating.
Her breaths felt more like pants the longer she stared at him. But just when she thought she should blink or look away, he did. Joker laughed and turned toward Harvey Dent, apparently making joke that made himself laugh. That's how the rest of the session proceeded. He made comments that she couldn't hear and would look at her every now and then, chuckling to himself or at others.
When he was being escorted away, he turned to look at her once more and winked. She inhaled quickly as she smiled at him but covered it by lightly coughing into the back of her hand. Officer Cash looked at her and she smiled politely at him, receiving one back. When she thought about it, even when Cash smiled, he still didn't look happy.
She gathered her untouched things and made the very familiar journey headed back to her office. The buildings hardly drew her attention at the moment. She knew she needed a better layout of the island soon, but it didn't need to happen today.
Her thoughts began to drift to the common room. He winked at me... He showed me a card trick... acknowledgement, no aggression... but he winked at me.. So far he's been polite. If that's what it was.
She closed her office door behind her and was met by the same lame white walls. All she had done to spruce up the place was organize the many files on Joker all over the room. The only real splashes of color were the magazine and newspaper clippings of his face pinned on one of her walls. She sat in her chair and stared at his face for a long while. His smile that showed no happiness, the green eyes that had a murderous look, and yet a comical gleam. Like he honestly loved what he did. Was that it? Or at least part of it? He enjoyed who he was, why would he want to be cured if he was enjoying himself? She turned back to her desk and began scribbling notes:
Observation 2: Theory 1: Joker's persona is what makes him happy. He enjoys what he does and when confronted with an option to change, I predict he will attack in any way. Will not directly or indirectly suggest that patient should change, will only delve into the cause behind why he commits violent acts, for the time being. Will reevaluate how to proceed after next observation.
She closed her notepad and turned back at the poster. Folding her hands in her lap she mused out loud, "How can I help you, Mister Joker?" as she gazed into that manically smiling face, unsure if she could stomach the answers she sought.