Gooood day to you my fine friends/followers/stalkers/habberdashers/haters and alligators! Hope you enjoy this juicy chapter! Thank you so much for your reviews, they keep me posting!
PS- i made little references and nods to the Arkham Origins game since i'm replaying it-again- for more inspiration. love love love!
The scene couldn't have been more amusing for the guards in the moniter station outside of the common room. Down the hallway they could hear laughter bounce off the white-wash walls coming closer with every giggle. It was the Joker. Mutterings became words as footsteps were added to the echos. One of the guards raised his weapon at the three that rounded the corner effortlessly. He lowered it upon seeing it was Officer Boles escorting Joker with a doctor in tow.
Harleen was ecstatic! She was so happy to see her Joker in a good mood now. As she signed in Joker on the common room attendance log, she heard him address the guards.
"Ah, the calvary is here! Thanks for the protection, boys! You never know what crazy coots may jump out at you!" he said making a lunging gesture that had every guard putting a hand to their holsters on their hips. Joker cackled at the spectacle, giving Harleen a grin as he was uncuffed by Boles and directed into the common room.
She stood in the most visible place for him in the station. She wanted to be able to see everything he did and show him what she was doing. Her pink notepad stayed at her side as her eyes followed the Joker's every move. Someone behind her cleared their throat bringing her out of her tunnel vision. Glancing around the station she saw that Cash wasn't present. Maybe he had something else to do and Boles gave him a needed break, she absently thought.
There weren't many patients in the common room. Other than Joker there was only Dr. Crane and Harvey Dent.
Harvey Dent again? He must be doin' good with his doctor.
Dr. Crane, also known as Scarecrow just sat in the old blue couch in front of the small tv that hung on the opposite wall to the guard station and observation glass. The tv's reception was a bit blurry but clear enough to hear the news anchors and see them. Crane sat upright with one leg's ankle resting on the other's knee. He was jotting down little notes on a few pieces of paper, not really paying attention to the broadcast. Dent was back at the table with his head slumped in one hand, the other spinning his coin; he seemed to be lost in thought.
She looked back at Joker who seemed to be looking at the room with disapproval. His fists rested on his hips and his foot tapped irritatingly. Harleen glanced down at the moniters and caught one screen that showed 3/4 of his face. She wove her way around the guards and old chairs to see the moniter up close but a guard was sitting on a chair smack in front of it.
"Excuse me?" She started politely. He was on his cell phone playing a game of Snakes.
She huffed for a moment then grabbed his chair and roughly yanked him out of her way.
"Hey!" he started.
"Sorry, but I need to see my patient clearly. You don't mind, do you?" she spoke to him but kept her eyes on the screen.
" Yeah, sure. Whatever," he mumbled and went back to his game.
Resisting to roll her eyes she studied Joker's face. His eyes flickered around the room, every few seconds the tapping of his foot increased its pace, and he seemed to be gritting his teeth behind his smile. After a moment he threw up his hands and exclaimed, "Alright, why so glum in here? Seriously, I'd find more cheer in a graveyard, hee hee. I'll have to plan that party later..."
He made his way to the end of the couch coming within eyeline of Crane. Whatever look Crane gave Joker must have been amusing because he put up his hands in a comical surrender.
"Touchy today, are we? Ha ha, liven up, Spooky!" He walked over to the table where Dent was and grabbed one of the chairs and plopped down. "Really, Harv, why this dreary air? It clashes with my complection!" Joker whined.
Dent just continued to spin his coin and puffed out a long breath. Joker looked at him for a moment then leaned in.
"Hey Face, what's eating him?" Joker chuckled out. Harleen jotted down a few things. Fascinating! He is trying to use one personality of Dent to find out what's wrong with the other. She looked up just in time to see Dent's hand slap down on the spinning coin and lift it a few inches to see what side came up. Must have been heads because he leaned back and began flipping his coin in the air.
"Why do you care, clown? Our business ain't yours." Two-Face growled. Harleen noticed when Harvey was mostly in control, he was more relaxed and calm, but Two-Face was defensive and threatening.
"Oh I'm hurt, really, I am," Joker said sitting back in his chair, his hand going to his chest then extending outward like an invitation. "I care, Face, so much that would put that guards life on it. HAH HA HA ha!" Joker gestured to the guard on his cell phone who was still unaware. "So what's wrong with you... and uh.. you. Hehe"
"What's in it for us?" Dent's shoulder's squared and he seemed more aggressive.
"How about a donut!" Joker laughed, slapping his knee. "I'll go half-sies with ya! One have sprinkles, one half plain?"
Dent shook his head. Joker crinkled his brows and said "Glazed? Coconut?" Dent growled in his throat, "Ok, ok! No coconut, geez! ...Chocolate? HA! I should have guessed!"
Dent leaned in and Harleen wasn't able to hear anymore. Her brows furrowed and she tried to focus on the moniter to read his lips but couldn't.
What is he saying? Harleen thought. She watched his mouth move as he spoke to Dent. His red lips never failing to smile as words came out. She nibbled on her bottom lip as she became lost in thoughts staring out at her patient.
"..Chocolate? HA! I should have guessed!" Joker knew he could score a donut somehow. But what he really needed from Two-Face was insight. Where was Cash? How long had it been since Bats last dropped by? And where the hell is a bloody ham sandwih when you need one?
"We got a letter today. Harv's upset 'bout it." Two-Face said, his scarred mouth turning downward.
Joker had never seen Face look dismal. He thought for a moment about what could have caused this reaction? Loss of territory? No, that would piss him off. Family ill? Unlikely. Lost a shoe? Must be it.
"Tev may come down. We don't want her to see us."
"Tev?" Joker questioned sarcastically. "What the devil is a Tev? It is a dog? I always imagined you were a cat person. Hahaha!" Joker scratched his head and leaned back with a bored expression. He picked up the battered stack of cards and began building a house of cards.
"Tev is our girl!" Dent barked at Joker," She wants to come down. She can't. She can't see us. We can't see her."
"Oh why not, double-take? Maybe she could get you out? With half a brain between you both, I'd think you could put two and two together. HA, you know what I mean."
"She can't, they'll lock her up to! If they find out we're... they'll lock her up here."
Joker paused with the card he was going to place and looked over at the blonde doctor a moment. Their eyes locked on each other and Joker thought of Dent's words. If they find out we're... together. Together was the word he didn't say. Joker knew why. If anyone gets involved with rogues, people immediately assume they're crazy too. The intern's baby blue orbs were pouring obvious emotions toward him. Would he get her locked up? Proabaly. It was all part of the plan, wasn't it? So why did he not like the notion of leaving her here once he escaped? Perhaps because when you put so much work into a masterpiece, you want to keep it. At least for a little while.
"Don't worry about it too much, Harv, you'll get wrinkles if you worry too much. Err, well, where you can. Now onto more important things! Have you-"
He was cut off by the tv news broadcast. It was a GCN News Alert drawing the attention of not only the patients, but the guards turning up the volume on the radio in the station as well.
Joker saw the pretentious face of Vicki Vale on the screen. One of these days he was going to blow her right off her high horse. A small video showing Blackgate surrounded by smoke, fire and police cars played in the top hand corner as she began.
"This is Vicki Vale with a Gotham News Alert. Appromiately 10 minutes ago an explosion went off in a corner of Blackgate Prison Facility. We have no confirmed reports yet as to what caused this, but we do know that 4 inmates are in critical condition- Wait, this just in! One inmate, Slade Wilson, known also as Deathstroke, has escaped in the chaos of the explosion. The prisoner is considered armed and extremely dangerous. We also have a confirmed report that moments after the explosion, the GCPD's rooftop signal for the Batman was lit. It is unknown whether the Batman is assisting the GCPD with the investigation. Commisioner Gordon is not available for comments at this time. We will return to keep you updated, Gotham."
Joker scoffed and turned around. "Well, someone is having a party and I didn't get an invite, now THAT IS JUST RUDE!" Joker yelled then exhaled dramatically. "Maybe I should throw my own party. What'd'ya think, Two-fer? Maybe something around the holidays. I do love presents at Christmas! ... Harv? Hello?"
But Harvey staring at the at the glass making Joker follow his line of sight. "Well color me black, it's Bats!" Joker commented, throwing his ams wide in a welcoming gesture. "Hey Bats, over here! Bats, yoo hoo! Over here, comrade!" Joker stood hopping from one foot to the next and flailing his arms.
The Batman, his best friend and most infuriating foe, was hauling a very disgruntled looking Penguin by the collar of his coat. Ozwald's wrists were cuffed but since his arms were short with his pudgey frame they rested on top of his belly in a polite manner. But Cobblepot was anything but polite.
"Get yer hands offa me, you brute!" Cobblepot's cockney's accent sounded thicker when upset; he shrugged his shoulder away from Batman's grip only to result in Batman tightening it. "Oww! You'll damage the coat, dammit! Ya got any idea 'ow much this costs? More than yer fancy boots- oww! ok, ok, damn you!"
Joker gave up his little dance since Bats clearly wasn't in a playing mood. The next thing he saw made his eyes narrow. Batman had shoved Penguin up to wall where his doc was standing and Cobblepot was enjoying the view of Harleen's backside. Joker wanted to gouge out Fish-breath's eyes with the way he was looking at HIS harlequin. She inched a little away from the short arms dealer. Batman turned and began speaking with Cash who had just come up with keys to unlock Penguin's cuffs. One of the guards took Penguin and put him in the common room, locking the door behind him. Cobblepot glared at the guard, muttering insults under his breath and rubbing his wrists.
"Well, if it ain't the clown, the crow, and the coin-flippin-fool. Figured I get you lot when I get 'ere," Penguin spat.
"Pengy! How good of you to join us. We were just admiring some of your handiwork," Joker gestured to the tv, raising an eyebrow knowingly.
"Oh really? And 'ow do you know it was me. I ain't got nobody in that joint I care about," Penguin puffed up defensively. "I ain't done a flippin' thing. All a misunderstandin', really."
"Ohh... hoohoohoo, who said anything about caring? It's all about money with you, short-stuff. And bombs strong enough to break through Blackgate's walls... well, those ain't cheap, chappy. So tell me, who had enough to pay you, hmm?"
"I have a strict client confidentiality clause, clown. Besides, my business is repeat clientel. If you get you're sick hands on 'em, I'll never see em again. So I ain't gotta tell you nothin' I'll be outta 'ere soon once Candy gets 'ere. Where is that bird, anyway.." Penguin said the last to himself, looking back as if expecting to see his lawyer-and-sometimes-girlfriend walk through the door at any moment. Instead he noticed the petite blonde doc and smiled pervertedly at her, making her cringe. "Although.. I could occupy my time with Bleachie over there. She new? Bet she hasn't been broken in yet.. heha -ah!"
As Penguin turned back around Joker was in his face, his upper lip snarling like a predator and eyes wild with madness.
"You're new to class, Ozzy, so I'll let you copy my notes from last week. The doc over there is all mine, already taken, you could say. But if you'd like her, I'd be happy to play for her. What shall we play? I've always loved pin the tail on the dead guy. No? How about Go fish.. at the bottom of Gotham Bay? What's wrong Pengy, I thought you wanted to play..?"
When Penguin shook his head quickly, Joker lowered his voice to rumble in his throat. "Good, then don't look at what's mine again if you know what's good for you or I'll personally show you that penguins can't fly." Cobblepot waddled away to the other side of the room, as far from Joker as he could manage. "Now that we're all friends again, who's for a game of Gin?"
He walked up to the glass making the blonde doc smile wider, but he wasn't looking at her, but at his nemicis. The Batman. He was at the end of the hallway, and must have felt Joker's eyes on him because he moved his icy, hardened glare to the madman. Joker just nodded his head once and saluted him with two fingers casually. Batman's glower deepened. He knew Joker's threats by now. And the gesture was clear. Game On.
With that, the Batman swept down the hallway and was gone from view. Joker looked back at the intern who was, again, only a pane of glass away from him. Her eyes stared deeply into his and he bowed ever so slightly at her and winked making her cheeks and neck flush. He turned back around, pleased that Cobblepot was still cowering near a corner and sat back down. Dent looked at him with a smirk on his face.
"What the bloody hell are you looking at?" Joker grumbled, his mind churning with thoughts about Batman and what he might be doing once he left here. Driving the Batmobile? Beating his boys to a pulp for information? Eating bat snacks?
"Oh, nothin' J, just enjoyin' the show," Two-Face replied glancing between him and Dr. Quinzel. He laughed dryly in his throat.
"Watch it, Bucko, or I'll make both sides of your face match," Joker chided darkly. Two-Face just laughed again, and flipped his coin high in the air and caught it, smiling, liking whatever decision he just made.
Officer Cash walked in then. "Cobblepot, your cell is ready. Let's go!" He raised his weapon, not at Penguin, but at Joker. Joker grinned evilly in return. Cash was well aware who the real threat was in this room.
Harleen watched as Cash took Cobblepot away. Apparently Batman suspected Penguin of supplying the explosives to whomever set off the bomb, he just needed to keep him contained until he found more evidence. Cobblepot was clearly happy to be out of there. She couldn't hear what Joker had said to him, but she was certain it was about her. She felt flutters in her stomach at the thought of Joker talking about her. Looking at the clock mounted in the station, she tapped a guard on the shoulder and motioned toward Joker explaining that she needed to take him back to her cell. She would have had Officer Boles to do it, but she sent him off on a special task. She wanted Joker to stay in high spirits for their session and she had a good idea how.
Joker tried telling a guard a joke as he cuffed him but was ignored. She heard they learned if Joker tells a joke to ignore him, he'll make that guard or nurse the punchline.
"So tell me, dear," Joker looked down at the blonde once they began walking back. "Did you learn anything today?"
She looked up at him smiling, but when she opened her mouth, her words came out garbled. "I, uh.. yeah.. err, You don't seem to like Mr. Cobblepot much." She tried stating the obvious. What she thought she learned, she didn't want tosay in case she was wrong.
"Oh, I wouldn't say I don't like him. He repulses me, sure, and if given the opportunity to kill him I would, but that's not the point, you know?"
She scrunched up her nose in thought for a moment then said "It's the joke, right? Whatever you do, it's all a joke. It's just if they get it or not..?"
"Very good! I can see you have the best chance at understanding me. Finally a doctor I can trust!" Harleen felt like she was flying rather than walking. He really thought she could understand him. He must really believe in her! She glanced at a clock on wall and stopped making Joker stop and turn back.
"Uh, I have to go prepare for our session, so I'll be back in a little bit."
"Sure thing, Dollface," Joker flirted. Harleen couldn't turn away fast enough to hide her huge smile and red face.
She walked at a fast pace down the long hall, hoping he'd like the surprise.
Joker watched the bubbley blonde all but skip down the hallway. He knew it would be able to make this cookie crumble, but she wasn't even fully baked! Like soft dough he could still mold into any shape he wanted. He thought back to the common room sessions they had in the beginning and the card she had chosen during their silent games. A diamond shape would be perfect.
He glanced over at the guard who was still staring at the intern. Joker gritted his teeth and yelled "HEY! Aren't you supposed to be securing a psycho who likes to play with the innards of people like yourself?!" The guard jumped and trained his weapon on Joker again. Joker just rolled his eyes and walked up to his cell. Once he was back inside and the soon-to-be dead guard left, he turned toaward his cot but stopped, almost stepping on something.
A metallic scratching noise made him stop as his foot lightly kicked a tray of food on the floor. "Interesting." He picked it up and observed it. There in a little plastic packaging was... Well how 'bout that? It was a ham sandwich! Complete with little condiment packages of salt, pepper, mayonaise, mustard and sugar. Sugar?
Guess she didn't know what to get. He'd have to change that.
Change that? Are you actually considering keeping her long enough to teach her how to make your food?
Could come in handy.
Point taken.
"Ah, so that's where Frankie had run off to. She sent him to go get sandwich. Intriguing that Frankie listened to her orders. Let's test that theory!"
He sat on his cot, ripped open the wrapping and devoured his sandwich with glee. Unbeknownst to him, a little harlequin was standing at the end of the wing, smiling as she heard his muffled laughter echo as he ate.
Omigoodness I hoped you liked it. PLEASE tell him if you did. Seriously, your reviews keep me updating. WAIT til you see the next session. Currently writing it like a crazy, in between playing Arkham origins and playing with my pug.