Hi guys, Calborghete here, how are you all? I hope everyone is doing well.

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So now without further ado, enjoy your reading.

"Dialogues"

- Thoughts -

"Radio Talk"

"Self talk."

Liability Note:

Evangelion, its characters and setting are the property of Hideaki Anno. Any brands, movies and series mentioned in this Fanfic are the property of their creators.

(*)

Chapter 24 - Forget Me Asuka.

What is life? That answer was simple, life is the period in which an organism develops, grows, survives and then dies, that is life, that is the pure description of an organism, what will be its role? Nothing could answer this question, only time would tell what the correct answer would be.

For many people life was something highly precious and that was sacred above all else, for others it didn't have the same value, for many it was just a collection of cells that were not doing something for their own good, the result of millions of years of adaptations and evolution, for others it was just the proof of the divine, the recreation of perfection, the image of God.

For Shinji it only existed, for him the answer had not yet been given, he didn't know if he believed in fate, he didn't know if he believed in God or in science, for the longer he caught himself thinking about it, the more he became afraid of the answer.

For if he believed in science, nothing would change the fact that the human being is an irrational animal who believes he has the gift of thought, for if he had this ability, why did he allow the world to be destroyed for greed? Killing animals for pleasure? These were the questions Shinji found himself asking, but as always, he didn't know the answer.

Thinking from the religious side, if God exists, if the Bible is correct, why does he allow his creation to cause so much evil to the world? Has he really given up on man? Wouldn't it be unfair for him to abandon the righteous people and not punish those who deserve to be punished?

Shinji didn't like to think about God, because every moment he did, but he believed in fate and this would only show him one thing, that he really was born to suffer.

Leaning against the wall, Shinji looked around, the place where he was was simple, it had a private bathroom, a bed and nothing else, the place was small, Wunder's cells were small, but this one was different, Misato made sure he had comfort.

Shinji was in jail, but not because of WILLE's orders, not because the crew was suspicious of him, but because Misato wanted someone to keep an eye on him twenty-four hours a day.

Lowering his gaze to the ground, Shinji closed his eyes as he remembered the moments in NERV, he finally had his father in his hands, he could end it all right there, end WILLE's war against NERV, he could finally end it all right there in the lapse of a single second.

Still not knowing where he had gone wrong, the point where he crossed a line that could have no return, clutching his legs tightly, Shinji again was feeling the weight of depression in his body, he knew he had people who supported him, he knew he had people who loved him with all they could.

"Are you going to do that to her? You know how she would look at your loss!"

Shinji felt his eyes burning as he remembered Misato talking about Asuka, knowing that his commander had played dirty by bringing her up at a time like that.

But who could he fool, Misato was right, even after everything that happened between him and Asuka, his death would cause Asuka a lot of pain, if the situation was reversed, he would look very bad, nodding to himself knowing that he would most likely be very broken and his actions could not be predicted.

With a long sigh, Shinji was sitting back, enjoying his self-pity, again he caught himself thinking about fate, one of humanity's biggest doubts, are people really destined for a purpose? Personally Shinji didn't believe in destiny, because how is it possible that someone could get screwed as badly as he did?

Is it some sick joke by some divine being? Was it just something the world could not control? Again he found himself without an answer, suspecting nothing, nothing came to his mind at such moments.

"Shit." Shinji whispered dejected at not being able to find the answers he would most like to have, again raising his gaze, his eyes soon roamed his "cell", his mind had already come to a conclusion about this, he knew Misato was worried about him, wanting it or not he had already tried to kill himself twice in his life so far.

Closing his eyes to the first time he tried, still being able to feel his room in his aunt and uncle's house, Shinji still remembered the countless times he heard them arguing about him, the discussions ranged to almost every subject, from his behavior to his father.

Shivering as he remembered, Shinji often heard people commenting about his father, how he had killed his wife and abandoned his son, many children did not come close to him for this reason, judging him to be a strange creature and so they stayed away.

Shinji still didn't know if his uncles thought the same, but one thing he was sure of, he was only welcome because of the monthly allowance Gendo sent them, a money that seemed more like a bribe to turn a blind eye to the task he had assigned them.

"When is he leaving?"

Shinji closed his eyes tightly when he heard his uncles voice, this question was asked very often when they were both talking about something, after hearing this question for so long, Shinji thought about disappearing.

He still remembered when he walked to the kitchen, took as much as his hands could carry, he didn't care about the functionality of the pills, he just wanted the pain to end.

Letting out a long sigh as he remembered sitting in his room, Shinji remembered staring at the packages, wondering what he was going to do, how alone he felt in the world, no one wanted him, no one loved him.

Every pill he swallowed, it was as if every suffering of his died, with every pill that went down his throat, a drop of happiness was born inside him, but one thing happened, a knock at the door prevented him from continuing.

"Who knew?" Shinji spoke to himself as he remembered his aunt with the letter in her hand, already knowing what would happen next, one of his worst nights of his life.

Knowing that his father was also on the ship, Shinji growled in disgust at the knowledge that his father was still alive, that again he had failed, but a memory came into his head, a short time after Misato had stopped him from finishing what he had started.

"No Shinji, you did not fail. You defeated him."

These words echoed strongly in Shinji's head, every time the silence reigned, he remembered Misato's words, her affection when she hugged him and tried to comfort him, how he still didn't feel worthy of the affection this woman had given him.

Finally he remembered when his life took a turn, and went uphill, the day his life got a little better, the day he met Misato, the woman who had nothing to do with him, the woman who could have been just another one in his life, took him in for no apparent reason, Shinji still wonders why.

He had never said this, but his gratitude would be eternal, even if he had made the third impact, even if she hated him for the rest of her life, one thing would never change in Shinji's mind, he would never stop being grateful for what she had done.

Finally his mind brought Asuka, a redhead he was supposed to hate for the way he was treated, and this really was his feeling at first, but after that night everything changed.

"Mom."

Shinji again looked at the ground, feeling a warmth in his chest as he remembered Asuka, he knew it was all just a big front, with a sarcastic laugh as he remembered her posture, having to maintain the tough guy, the guy who didn't cry, it was all hard for Shinji.

"Asuka." Shinji spoke fondly as he remembered when he finally got to taste the honey of her kisses, even after all the shit that had happened to him, the girl of his dreams had never lost her strength.

But his smile was short-lived, knowing that his fate was set, General Yamamoto had been very clear, he was going back to prison, that even Misato couldn't change.

He knew Misato and Asuka wouldn't accept it, that they were ready to fight to the end, but he didn't want that, both had suffered enough because of him, Misato still had to deal with Wunder, take care of his crew and deal with the shit of the world.

Asuka was the same, she had to have her head on straight and she couldn't have to deal with him, she had to have a good and decent life, she couldn't waste time on a lost case, he was at the bottom of the hole and he wasn't going to sink Asuka and Misato with him.

Closing his hands tightly and giving a long sigh, Shinji just wanted all this to end, all the suffering to end, no more pain, no more crying, no more being a burden.

(*)

Accommodations

Mari and Asuka were in their room, the only sound emanating was Mari's legs bumping against her bed in a sign of boredom.

With a dull sigh, Mari spoke as she looked at the bedroom wall with disdain.

"Boring."

Asuka was in her bed, sitting looking at her ceiling, Wunder was low on morale, everyone already knew about WILLE's betrayal, everyone learned about what happened inside NERV, everyone understood Shinji's point.

Feeling the anger rising within her, Asuka still shuddered as she learned what had happened inside NERV, how Shinji was ready to die, how he had thrown his whole life away.

Her nights had been horrible, knowing that Shinji had again tried to kill himself had brought her memories back to the surface, memories she wanted to forget, with her eyes closed, Asuka could hear the sound.

"Mama! Mommy!"

Footsteps echoed through Asuka's mind, she would always remember, these memories were like a movie.

"I was chosen! I would be the best!"

"Everyone will like me now!"

"I shouldn't tell anyone, but to you I can!"

"I will be the best, I will protect the world! Just like you wanted!"

"You'll get better now! We're going to be a family again!"

The sound of a door opening echoed through the mind of the redhead, who still kept her eyes closed, reliving what would be the worst day of her life.

"Mom?"

Asuka blinked as she came back to reality, she could feel her breathing slightly quickening, sweat was dripping down her forehead and her hands were shaking, again she lost the battle against the memories that always won, the only time this didn't happen, was when she was with Shinji.

"Baka." Asuka whispered upon learning that Shinji was now in a Wunder cell, still finding a lot of paranoia from Misato, but she could understand, Shinji had to be monitored for his safety, but did it need to be in a cell? At least he would have someone keeping an eye on him all day and night.

Mari still remembered when Sakura had pressured them, they still remembered the look of betrayal that Sakura had, telling her was difficult, the young doctor trembled with anger to know that Shinji had been deceived again, but this time by the hands of the people who should be the good guys in this movie.

Mari smiled as she heard that Sakura was going to ask for dismissal from WILLE, she could understand her anger, everything Shinji had gone through to help them was now being destroyed, but soon a crazy idea popped into Mari's mind. "Princess?"

Asuka only made a sound with her mouth, signaling that she had heard, but judging that Mari had not started to speak, this only made her anger grow.

Still waiting for Mari's response, Asuka only huffed as she placed her hands on her thighs. "What was four eyes!"

Asuka heard Mari getting up, soon her eyes locked on her sister, seeing how serious her face was, the redhead only waited for the words. "What is it?"

Mari was thoughtful, many ideas formed in her head, a lot of things could sound crazy and probably were, Mari again locked her eyes on Asuka and spoke in a calm voice.

"Asuka I was thinking..." Mari began to speak in a calm, controlled voice. "Doesn't this all seem planned?"

Asuka frowned upon hearing this, her mind took interest in Mari's crazy theory, but her body didn't show it. "What do you mean?"

Mari moved closer and propped her arms on Asuka's bed, her mind still machining all her thoughts. "Think about it, when Shinji was arrested, Wunder couldn't fly and Unit 01 shut down completely."

"Yes." Asuka retorted as she faced Mari, she remembered the time Wunder stood still to be adapted, everything was very chaotic in those days.

"After that, Shinji somehow manages to escape and everything, but that's not my point." Mari spoke as she began to get anxious. "He managed to reactivate unit 01."

Asuka only raised an eyebrow at her sister's words, it made sense, but one thing still didn't fit into it all. "OK, but you have a problem with your plan."

Mari only stared at Asuka with her eyebrows raised in a sign of confusion, Asuka only smiled arrogantly and spoke. "Of course you didn't understand because you're dumb."

Mari cast a sour look at Asuka, but she soon listened to her sister. "If they wanted Shinji to somehow reactivate unit 01, they just had to have picked him up from jail and done it."

Mari pondered this, but she soon retorted in a calm, controlled voice. "But still, Shinji left first, he took the unit, and that's when we got him." Mari looked away for a moment of epiphany. "He was caught too easy, we got an order from command to protect a benefactor of WILLE, who all by the way was a German tycoon."

"Keel Lorenz." Asuka spoke this person's name, she knew how powerful he was, but soon she began and understood Mari's point.

"Yes, he is a very rich and powerful man, but that's not it." Mari spoke as she moistened her lips. "The guards told me that at that time Shinji was hunting the SEELEs, and he was caught right behind Keel."

Asuka nodded, Shinji had never been wrong before when it came to SEELE, finally understanding Mari's point. "One of the soldiers mentioned that Shinji called Keel SEELE 01 before he was caught."

Mari clapped her palms together to show her point, she was getting very agitated with all her theory and knowing that Asuka was understanding her point was giving more energy to the woman who loved pink. "Exactly."

"Think about it Asuka." Mari spoke as she calmed down a bit. "Shinji reactivated Unit 01, WILLE captures him about with super privileged information, they propose a 'deal', after everything calms down regarding Shinji, they order his arrest."

"Are you saying you have a SEELE in WILLE?" Asuka asks apprehensively. "That somehow they are acting in concert?"

"I don't know, but think about it." Mari spoke as she faced Asuka's legs with a lost and thoughtful look. "WILLE had never caught any SEELE, do you think Shinji could get the information needed, wouldn't an organization like WILLE get it easier? Damn Shinji was living on the street practically."

"It seems WILLE didn't want SEELE to disappear." Mari spoke as she turned somber. "They knew that Shinji was getting the SEELE members and did nothing to stop it and when he is close to the 'big boss' WILLE decides to act and stop Shinji."

Asuka only nodded, she was understanding everything, really Mari's points were good, it would be hard to find arguments that would prove her wrong, but evidence was lacking. "WILLE hid the truth about the third impact, if you think about it, it seemed like they wanted Shinji to stay locked up, in a place where they could access him whenever they wanted."

"And not to mention that WILLE released all the imprisoned SEELES." Mari completed her sister, still keeping a thoughtful look on her face. "Why were they released anyway? Everyone could see that they were guilty! It was only a matter of time before they were all revealed!.. "

Asuka nodded at the words, there really was something very wrong going on at WILLE, Asuka just wanted none of this to fall on the back and Shinji. "But why Shinji?"

"I really don't know, but he is the only one who can control unit 01." Mari spoke as she stared Asuka in the eye. "And you know very well that that unit has something strange about it, it has always been very protected by Gendo in NERV and it seems that SEELE has a different look too."

"And they know what that unit looks like." Asuka retorted as she fed her sister's theory, "If they have a plan, they can't get rid of Shinji, because they risk losing her again."

Mari only nodded, soon a hush reigned through the room, with a tired sigh, Mari spoke to Asuka. "We'll explain to Misato when tempers calm down."

Asuka only nodded, but not before seeing Mari smiling like a cat. "What?"

Mari only spoke as she smiled. "Nothing, just thinking that you haven't gone to welcome the puppy yet." Mari finished with her eyebrows very suggestively.

Asuka blushed slightly, but soon that passed, a downcast look remained on her face. "I don't want to see him like this, he ... He must be destroyed and I don't know how to help. "

Mari returned to serene form, looking at her sister with a compassionate look, speaking calmly. "Asuka, even if you have nothing to talk about, just showing you care will already help."

Asuka was looking at Mari, she could feel the urge to cry, but she managed to hold back her emotion, nodding lightly. "I'll see if I'll go later."

Mari smiled as she saw that she had helped, moving away from the bed. "If the conversation doesn't work, I bet the guard will understand if you ask for some time alone with him if you know what I mean?"

Asuka giggled a little as she tried to kick her sister, "Pervert."

"At least I admit it." Mari spoke as she began to make her way to the bathroom to take a shower.

Finally alone, Asuka returned to her world, she again caught herself thinking about Shinji and how she could help him, but no idea came to her mind, she just didn't want Shinji to regress.

(*)

Interrogation room - Wunder.

Misato was standing behind strong glass, her eyes locked firmly on the person on the other side, her stance strong and cold, exactly showing that he was nothing.

Gendo was just sitting in his chair, his eyes locked on Misato's, both of them staring hard at each other, he was dressed in a gray ensemble, not feeling intimidated in the least by Misato.

"Colonel Katsuragi." Gendo spoke in a cold voice, holding his posture harshly.

Misato only stared at his face, as he didn't show due respect in the situation he was in, finally Gendo was in Wunder, finally he was where he should be, but one thing wasn't right in this case, she wasn't feeling the taste of victory, she wasn't feeling the satisfaction of finally being able to see a light at the end of the tunnel with the end of this war.

Letting out a long sigh at Gendo's lack of reaction, Misato felt the urge to kill this man right there, activate the choker he was wearing, watch his head explode and send his brains all over the room, Misato knew that people wouldn't care about cleaning up the mess that would be left behind.

Looking at Gendo with contempt and disgust, Misato had only one thing on his mind, how much disgrace this man caused to the world, how he caused suffering to everyone around him, how he didn't even bother to cause his own son great suffering.

Misato closed his eyes as he remembered Shinji, Gendo only didn't notice because of the strong glasses that hid his eyes, Misato was thinking how this poor child suffered at the hands of this man, how everything was thrown on his shoulders because of his ambitions, having his life destroyed because of this man.

Knowing that she could not stare at his face any longer, Misato decided to speak.

"Ikari Gendo." Making a great effort not to throw up at the mention of that name, wanting to finish this and be able to think of a way to help Shinji in his case against WILLE. "You are being arrested by WILLE forces, being charged with mass genocide and conspiracy to destroy human life, you will be taken to one of the colonies for your trial for your crimes against humanity."

Gendo listened to everything, his body stood firm as a rock, his breathing was calm and controlled, he wasn't paying attention to the things that were being said about him, his mind was thinking about his scenario.

Misato didn't care to listen to a possible response, only turning her head and speaking to Ritsuko who was standing next to her with a downcast and betrayed look on her face, surely being around Gendo did him good. "Subcommander Akagi, explain about the choker." Misato ordered in a cold voice.

Ritsuko was in her world, she looked at the man whose heart she longed to get, memories of being used by him came back in her head, her face showed her sadness, but Misato's words brought her back to the real world.

"You received a DSS choker, as you were present in your initial production, but I will explain again." Ritsuko spoke dismissively as she showed the holographic image of the choker to Gendo. "Any attempt to escape she will be triggered and will end your life, I recommend obeying."

Gendo stood his ground, he knew how the choker worked, having seen that Shinji was wearing one when he ordered Rei to capture him a few years ago.

"Do you understand?" Ritsuko asked coldly to Gendo, trying to show that her presence was having no effect, but unlike Misato, Gendo had full view of her face, and he could see her discomfort.

Again he remained silent, only his breathing showed any movement.

Misato saw this, feeling her blood boiling with the silence and lack of sense of danger, Gendo didn't seem to be taking the moment seriously, he was acting like he was in control of the situation, growling when he didn't respond, closing his fists and speaking annoyed.

"She asked if you understood!?" Misato growled at Gendo as he moved a little closer to the glass, feeling his blood boiling with the lack of an answer.

"Never mind, guards!" Misato ordered her men, she could see how anxious they were about the situation they were in. "Take him to the maximum isolation cell! It doesn't matter if he understands or not!"

With a salute, all the heavily armed guards went towards Gendo, seeing how he was hand and foot cuffed, Gendo showed no intimidation, he only looked at Misato.

Misato still scarpered at Gendo, but shifted her eyes to one of her men, still speaking strongly. "I want confirmation that this animal is in the cell!. "

"Yes ma'am." Answered the leader of the group of soldiers as he approached Gendo.

Approaching Gendo with weapons in hand, all the guards were attentive, they knew how dangerous Gendo was, but before he was ordered to stand up, Gendo stood up, all the guards pointed their weapons.

Misato only faced Gendo with a defiant look, showing that he would not be afraid to order his death, seeing this Gendo only turned and started walking out of the room with Misato's men on guard, just waiting for any sign that they might shoot.

Misato seeing that she was finally alone, she could see Ritsuko sitting at a computer console, she knew they had an affair in the past, feeling sorry for her long time friend.

Letting out a long sigh, Misato crossed her arms and approached Ritsuko who was smoking while reading some information on her computer. "How are you?"

Ritsuko blinked as she let out a cloud of smoke, her eyes never leaving the screen. "I'm fine." But the truth was that she was far from fine, seeing Gendo again brought back the worst memories of her life, knowing that she was only a doll in his hands made her disgusted with herself. "When he gets what he deserves I will feel better."

Misato only nodded, she wanted Gendo dead more than anything, and now it looked like she would finally get that chance.

Ritsuko's mind was full, a person came into her head, it would be good to clear her mind, taking a long drag on the cigarette again. "How is Shinji?" Ritsuko asked with a disdainful voice as she let out the smoke.

Misato lowered her gaze as she remembered, she was lost with the internal image of the cell where she had put Shinji, still feeling the guilt of putting him in a cell again, but he would have to be heavily guarded, she didn't want her fragile mind to try another blunder and unfortunately a cell was the best place, it would have guards all the time.

"I haven't talked to him yet, I have to waste time with his father's garbage." Misato spoke frowning as she leaned on the wall, her mind still trying to understand how Gendo could have had a son like Shinji. "They are so different, it doesn't even seem like he is father and son."

Ritsuko nodded slightly, her mind wondering that too, but unlike Misato, she thought Shinji and Gendo looked a little alike. "Good thing he pulled his mother."

Misato can't help but smile as she hears this, nodding as she agrees, it really was a great blessing that Shinji pulled his mother's features, it would be strange to see someone who looked like Gendo next to him. "Good ... I still can't believe that a man like Gendo could have sired a son like Shinji."

Ritsuko finally looked at Misato with tired eyes. "It's simple, everything is possible when you have a sperm and an ovum, and with the right hormones at the right time."

Misato only stared at Ritsuko with skeptical eyes, but listened to everything intently. "All feelings are nothing but electrical stimuli in the brain, the glands tell us when we should feel anger, joy, sadness, pleasure, there's nothing much to it, not even a special touch of fate or right timing."

"You really believe that?" Misato asked as she brought one hand to her cross necklace she carried around her neck, having reattached it after Shinji was arrested, she wore it to remind herself of Shinji in the bad times of her life. "Don't you think you have some higher being who helps those who deserve it?"

Ritsuko was skeptical about religion, still not understanding how a person could believe they had a being that could judge humanity, but as she thought about it, many things on earth that had happened that could not be easily explained.

Putting out her cigarette, Ritsuko spoke as she stood up and picked up her coat. "It doesn't matter if it exists or not, what I can tell is what is in front of me, if I can't see it, it doesn't exist for me."

Misato only stared at the back and Ritsuko as she stood up and left the room, again alone in her privacy, Misato removed her glasses and ran her hands through her hair. "Shinji ... Don't worry, the suffering will be over soon, I promise you that."

After saying these words Misato again put her glasses back on, looking at her reflection in the glass if everything was within what it should be, Misato knew very well that a lot would still happen, a lot of serious things would happen, she would have to start thinking about how she would help Shinji.

With each passing second, the more the WILLE commando approached Shinji, the more the convoy of men approached Wunder, feeling a chill run down his spine as he imagined the scene in his head, having Shinji again removed from his hands had a very bad taste in his mouth.

Leaving the interrogation room, Misato could only think of Shinji, she still had the mental image of him sitting in his cell looking at nothing, she knew he would be in a whirlwind of emotions right now, his mind would be very weak and fragile.

Knowing she would be too agitated to think of anything, but a small idea came to her, nodding at the thought, this person could help, even though she didn't have much hope with that, but Misato would have to try, she had to try something, speeding her steps to her living room, she had a small conference to do and she knew exactly who it would be with.

Ignoring her men who gave her greetings, Misato walked with accelerated steps to her office, closing the door and sitting at her computer, Misato typed some commands, a waiting image appeared, her nerves were about to explode with the delay, every second seemed like hours, finally the person appeared.

Looking at the person's face, Misato swallowed dryly, she had talked to him before, but she was never the one to call, grimacing slightly at the sight of his arrogant smile and shabby beard.

"Hello Katsuragi." Kaji spoke with his original smile on his face, he knew Misato was calling to talk about Shinji, but his personality couldn't miss the chance to tease his crush. "Sorry, but I can't show myself now, people might see."

Misato rolled her eyes at seeing Kaji's cheap flattery, but she soon returned to the seriousness of before, Kaji noticed this, but her smile never left her face, it had already become a habit for him. "Is the transmission secure?"

Kaji lowered his gaze, soon his hands typed in some commands, Misato noticed the screen wobble, but after that, Kaji spoke seriously. "It is now."

Misato nodded, putting her palms together in a sign of anxiety. "I need your help."

Kaji only nodded, he was looking for some way to help Shinji in a definite way, but his search was failing, he was running out of options, he himself was already becoming seriously worried.

(*)

Accommodations - Wunder.

Asuka was in her bed, she could hear Mari's snores, still wondering how he could sleep so easily, feeling her mind racing, Asuka was thinking of a way to talk to Shinji, feeling the weight of frustration at not knowing how.

With a growl at not coming to any conclusion, the redhead gave an annoyed snort, leaving gently so as not to wake Mari, Asuka took a good look at her sister's face, seeing how soundly asleep she was.

"That ... That." Mari spoke in her sleep, a slight smile appearing on her face. "Here? In front of everyone? Naughty boy." Mari spoke with her voice heavily choked with sleep, but her words could easily be interpreted.

Asuka stopped dressing, having heard what Mari was saying, shaking her head as she put on her pants. "Pervert."

Leaving the room, Asuka was dressed in her red jacket, looking forward as she walked to the holding section, she could see the crew members looking at her face, especially her eye patch, she hated this attention, feeling like some kind of freak.

Passing through all the sections that lay along the way, Asuka entered the detention area, she could see Shinji's cell light on, stopping and taking courage to approach. "Come on."

Walking lightly, Asuka could see the guard looking at her, everyone at Wunder knew that Shinji and Asuka had become intimate people, no words needed to be said, getting up and leaving gave them both privacy.

Asuka thanked him as she saw the guard leaving, with a slight nod between them, stopping in front of the cell, Asuka could see Shinji sitting on the floor staring at the ceiling with a lifeless look, this sight broke her heart.

How she wanted him to be in his room now, a cell was a horrible place to be, but Asuka understood, Shinji was very weak mentally, any push could cause a tragedy.

"Baka-Shinji?" Asuka spoke with a smile on her face, she was using her nickname in hopes of breaking the ice in the place.

Shinji was sitting looking at the ceiling, he had heard the sounds of footsteps, they were delicate, but his eyes never left the ceiling. "An unknown ceiling." Completely ignoring Asuka, his mind was so locked in thought that he had not listened.

"Baka!" Asuka spoke more forcefully, hoping to get Shinji off his journey of self-pity.

Finally acknowledging Asuka's presence, Shinji turned his head slightly to the side, seeing the redhead of his dreams. "Asuka?" Speaking weakly.

Asuka shuddered as she heard Shinji's voice, she could feel his distress. "How are you?"

Shinji gave a long sigh, still maintaining his haggard and broken posture, his eyes had dark circles under his eyes and he was tired, the nightmares were consuming him inside, but he was tired of making others worry about him. "I'm fine."

Asuka felt an anger welling up inside her, she could see that Shinji was not well, making a great effort not to scream, feeling a little calmer, but that didn't stop her from asking. "Well? Are you really okay?"

Shinji felt the sarcasm in her voice, he couldn't deny it, it really was far from okay. "Asuka ... I ... let it go."

Asuka noticed Shinji's movement, seeing how unhelpful he was being right now, feeling his anger getting stronger and stronger. "What the fuck Shinji! Tell me straight up!"

Shinji only rolled his eyes and faced Asuka, still sitting on the floor, "I've had enough."

Asuka heard that word and stopped, looking at Shinji with confused eyes. "What?"

Shinji closed his eyes as he leaned the back of his head against the wall, he didn't want to have to face Asuka's gaze. "I told you I've had enough."

Asuka finally understood Shinji's point, that word "I got tired" caused her stance to break down. "Are you going to give up?"

Shinji let out a long sigh as he reopened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. "You can't beat Asuka, I'm so tired."

Asuka looked at Shinji with a look of bewilderment and disgust, seeing how easily he was giving up. "You ... Are you going to leave it at that!?" Asuka spoke strongly as she saw Shinji's withdrawn posture, this only made her anger increase even more.

"I will." Shinji spoke dejected and defeated. "You can't beat Asuka, WILLE controls the world these days, you can't take them on."

"No!" Asuka spoke as she felt her eyes burning, an intense blue glow emanated from her eye patch. "No! You can't give up!" Asuka shouted to Shinji, but that didn't seem like it would give the desired effect.

"I'm sorry Asuka." Shinji spoke as he finally faced Asuka, his eyes were burning asking him to cry, but Shinji didn't want to.

"I'm so fucking sorry!" Asuka spoke strongly to Shinji. "You have no right to give up! Not after all you've accomplished!" Asuka spoke as she felt her hands shaking.

"I'm sorry." Shinji spoke as he began to cry, seeing Asuka like this destroyed any courage and drive he had. "But I can't take you down with me."

"Down?!" Asuka retorted perplexed, her anger still screaming loudly. "We can't let them win!" Asuka began to feel panic taking hold of her.

"They beat me Asuka." Shinji spoke as he wiped his face, his posture was still defeated. "I will die in prison Asuka."

Asuka lowered her gaze to the floor, she felt tears streaming down her face, soon they began to hit the floor. "You ... Are you going to break your promise?"

Shinji looked at Asuka, he could see her downcast posture, he remembered that he had promised her he would never stop hugging her, never stop loving her, never abandon her, but how could he fulfill that by destroying her life?

"I'm sorry Asuka." Shinji spoke as he felt the weight of those words.

Asuka closed her fists as she heard this, feeling her heart breaking, but Shinji continued, his eyes wide at the words.

"I can't drag you down." Shinji spoke as he stood up, he could see Asuka paralyzed in place. "I can't destroy your life Asuka, you can't waste your time on me."

"I ... I'll come visit you." Asuka whispered to Shinji, still hoping to change his mind.

"That's the reason! " Shinji spoke as he closed his fists. "I can't accept that! You deserve the world Asuka, I can't deny you the chance to be happy!"

"What do you think can make me happy?" Asuka whispered dejectedly, but her eyes widened at Shinji's next words.

"Asuka, you don't know ... You don't know how much I love you." Shinji spoke with his face marked by tears, speaking this only caused more tears to come out of his eyes. "I wish I could wake up next to you every day, but I can't. I wish I could give you children, but I won't be able to."

Asuka had finally heard those magical words that every woman would like to hear from her soul mate, from the person who would be the love of her life, the person who really understood her fears, but life was not like in fairy tales.

Shinji only continued speaking, strongly dejected. "I would like to see you well old by my side, but I won't be able to. You deserve the best in life Asuka and this person." Shinji paused to point at himself. "It won't be me, that's why I want you to forget me!"

Asuka finally raised her gaze to Shinji with downcast and betrayed eyes, feeling the tears tearing at her face, at this point she didn't care about people seeing her like this.

Hearing this, she knew she could never be happy, even though Shinji had the best intentions in this case, she could never forget him, even trying as she had in the past.

"I would like to be by your side forever." Shinji spoke as he lowered his gaze to the ground, fists tightly closed. "But I won't be able to do that, and I won't take you down with me."

Asuka wanted to open her cell and beat Shinji to a pulp, but she couldn't, she understood Shinji's words, how he wanted her to have a good life, something he thought he couldn't give her.

Sobbing, Shinji only watched as Asuka turned and ran off, she only sat down on the ground again, bringing her hands to her face as she cried hard.

"I'm sorry Asuka."

Asuka was running through the halls of Wunder, she just wanted to disappear, still having tears on her face, she ignored people's stares.

(*)

Mari was sitting up in bed, having woken up after her nap, she was wondering where Asuka was when the door suddenly opened, her eyes widened when she saw Asuka's condition.

"What happened?" Mari asked worriedly as she got up and went to meet her sister, soon she felt Asuka's arms hugging her tightly, returning the hug, Mari thought about what could have happened as Asuka cried in her arms. "Calm down it's okay."

Asuka doesn't know how long she cried, but she was thankful that Mari was already awake, she needed her sister, she could only speak between heavy sobs

"How can he ask me for something like that?"

(*)

Misato finally told Kaji everything she had in mind, she hoped he would have a miraculous idea, but even for Kaji this was difficult.

"We have to do something Kaji." Misato spoke dejectedly as she talked to Kaji. "I can't allow him to be arrested."

Kaji watched Misato breaking down rapidly in front of his screen, he wished he could go over to console her. "I don't know Misato, I'm thinking about it every day, but I never get a solution."

Misato began to sob slightly, Kaji felt his heart breaking at the sight. "Misato." Kaji called her by her first name, seeing Misato staring at him with red eyes.

"I will think of something, I promise you."

Misato nodded as she began to cry, she wishes Kaji was by her side at these times, but at least he was somehow in front of her, controlling her emotions enough to be able to return to her conversation.

"Then will be here in a few days, I don't know what to do." Misato spoke agitatedly as she looked at Kaji with desperate eyes.

Kaji had some information about this, rightly would call to alert Misato. "About that Katsuragi..." Kaji saw Misato change his posture radically.

Misato only looked at Kaji, she recognized that look, it was the same look when he discovers something, feeling a bad feeling. "Kaji?" Misato asked apprehensively.

Kaji let out a long sigh as he alerted Misato. "The train that is being prepared, there is something wrong."

"What do you mean?" Misato asked curiously, but she could sense that it wouldn't be a good thing. "Speak up Kaji!"

"They are not normal soldiers like in any transfer." Kaji began to speak, his face showing his concern. "The command is sending a special troops."

"Who are they?" Misato asked apprehensively, her heart beating hard, her eyes wide at Kaji's next words.

Kaji took a breath and spoke with an extremely serious look on his face, speaking slowly and calmly.

"Most soldiers are from the former JSSDF assault force."

Author's Notes: Hello Calborghete folks here, how are you? Did you like it? I hope so. As always be sure to follow and save it to your favorites so you don't miss any future updates.

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