The goodbyes are just as tearful as they were back home as we start on the second leg of our road trip. It's long hours and filled with tantrums and barking until they both exhausted themselves. It was another cheap hotel in some city we didn't know, the next morning I sat in the back seat watching Owen and holding bags for her as she cries as she gets sick over and over again. Itchy arms, an upset stomach, and a change of clothes at a rest stop where I resorted to pull-ups for any other accidents. It was the worst I'd seen in so long that I called dad at one point scared. He told me what every doctor told me, as long as her breathing didn't become laboured she was most likely fine. I tried to comfort her the best I could, trying to reason with her why she couldn't sit on my lap.
When we finally made it to the city we were later than we had hoped but we had kept in contact that our new landlord was waiting for us. We had video chatted once or twice, and Delaney and Trisha met the older gentleman. It's colder than expected, much colder, to which the old man chuckles.
"Welcome to Winnipeg," he says. "Is she okay?" He asks looking at my blotchy child.
"Allergy flare-up, she'll be okay though," I tell him.
"Well, I'll give you a quick tour of the place, and the keys and be out of the way. Your friends were here dropping a few things off for you as well." He mention which surprised me that they would do something as such for us.
It was a duplex, townhouse? Something that had a yard which was something we didn't expect, nor did we expect the cold!
We find blankets, a few necessities in the fridge like milk and some apple juice, a loaf of bread and some peanut butter and jam. Upon inspection it was also soy free, they remembered. These new friends and co-workers I had made. I had told Delaney about Owen, feeling guilty as she called one day as I was trying to keep Owen from hanging herself. It was easier to explain than it was to hide, but I asked her to keep it to herself as I rather tell other company members myself.
Still, someone had brought an old air mattress and pillows as well for us, a few camping chairs. Toilet paper and some clean but older towels. There was even a gift card to a local pizza place for us so we could have some supper that night. There is even a basket of little things as well from some of the other dances I barely knew. I cry at the sight of it.
The walls were white, and our things still weren't here but it oddly felt like home. Our first home together in many ways.
I call Dad letting him know that we made it safely and that the place was good. He had been worried about us being scammed for some reason.
We do a quick run to the pharmacy and grocery store, getting a few things and some oatmeal bath for Owen who was still covered in hives. We let her play in the tub as we try and figure out what we want for dinner. Finding what was safe to eat for Owen was the sure priority. But for now, let the oatmeal soak into her skin as she played until the water was cold and I dressed her in her footed pyjamas and brushed out her hair for her.
We eat on the floor and let Jack find a place for his bed and toys for the night as well. We are bone tired and fall asleep not long after Ken put the garbage away for us.
Owen is tucked in the middle of us on the air mattress, we lay down, reaching across to hold each other's hands.
The next day is a bit surreal to wake up in our new place. I check on Owen and her hives which have mostly gone away.
I fix her breakfast as best as I can with what we have and get her dressed. Ken is still sleeping after long hours of driving. I text him when I bundle up Owen and go out for a short walk with Jack. Definitely will need to get Owen a heavier jacket for the fall here, as I put her in a sweater and her jacket, hat and mitts.
Ken was up, still shirtless and tired as we come in it as I am holding two coffees and Jack at the same "There's a place for coffee around the corner with a walk-up window." I explain to him with a kiss.
"That is awesome," he says yawning after he kisses me back.
"I'm gonna go shower, the minion is fed but feed her again if she is still hungry," I tell him and watch him nod.
I figure out the shower and relax under the stream of water. I wash my hair and rake a wide toothcomb through it as I let the conditioner soak in. Taking a moment to relax and have a moment to myself. I can hear giggling as shut off the shower and tip-toe down the hall to what would be our bedroom to my suitcase. I find clean underwear and clothing and throw them on grabbing my pills I go back and place them in the old medicine cabinet.
Ken and I switch places as he gets ready for the day with a shower of his own and fresh clothing.
Our things won't come for another day or two, but we plan to make use of a trip to the local Ikea. Beds, sofa, kitchen table and chairs, bookcases.
I call him unsure if I should feel annoyed or grateful.
"I didn't think you would be up this early," Dad says answering the phone with what I can imagine is a grin on his face.
"Well, someone doesn't always respect time changes," I say sighing. "So is there a reason I have a few extra grand in my account or do I get to guess?"
"It's just what I would have spent on tuition for you this year," Dad says simply. "I figured you could use it to help with the move and settling in. It's technically your money anyway, though much like the rest of your siblings if there is any left you'll get access to the account when you turn twenty-one." He tells me.
"Oh, well thank you I guess?" I say quietly.
"So what are your plans for your first day?" Dad asks, and as he says it, I can picture him leaning back in his favourite chair, because it squeaks when it does.
"Shopping I suppose? I things won't be here until tomorrow, but we need groceries and they have an Ikea here so we'll go order a bunch of things," I say.
"Can I see the place?" He asks which surprises me when it shouldn't really. I nod my head and turn on the video.
"This is the dining and kitchen area," I explain showing off the space, the back over here are the bedrooms, bathroom and laundry room. Yes, laundry we don't have to pay for it, which is amazing. This will be Owen's room," I open the door and let him see the decent-sized room.
"Oh that looks like a decent sized," Dad says nodding his head.
"It is, umm this will be ours," I say before moving on back towards the front of the house.
"Owen Paw-Paw is the phone," I call out to her.
"Paw-paw!" She shrieks and comes running towards me. I bend at my knees so she can be in the video and I see Ken also wave at my father from his spot in one of the camp chairs.
We spend far too long in Ikea was Owen runs around and picks out her room and other things for us. We end up arranging for delivery for most of it, minus the mattress in a box, that we plan on using for Owen so she could have her own bed.
All of this came from pooling savings together and from what I learned was an Ikea gift card from Leslie and Owen, and of course, the money dad put in my account as well.
Moving is an experience that is for sure as we begin the first initial stock up of food.
When the truck finally comes the next day, we welcome our things with excitement. Mostly though I try to keep Owen out of the way, the same with Jack by taking both of them for a walk, exploring our little neighbourhood park as Ken supervises and keeps watch. I bring Owen to the nearby park and let her run wild.
"How old is she?" Someone asks me.
"Three and a half?" I answer her and the lady looks at me. "Your's is about the same? "
"She's turning four in January," She nods her head. "You are not from around here?"
"We just moved from the island, is my accent that stand outish out here?" I ask her.
"Just a little," She says. "Welcome to the neighbourhood though."
"Thanks, Rilla by the way."
"Greta, nice to meet you," she tells me. "Your little one is adorable."
"Thank you, so is yours. We call her Owen, well I do—Ken usually calls her Elowen because technically Owen is his father's name," I say as I shiver a bit. "Is it always this cold?" I ask with a laugh.
"Thank you as well, we named her Laurel, and it is." she laughs back. "You're going to invest in a good winter jacket for everyone."
"I have a feeling we are going to have to flesh out her fall and winter clothing as much as furniture," I say sighing.
"What brings you to Winnipeg?" She asked curiously next.
"I am an apprentice at the Royal Winnipeg Ballet," I tell her.
"That is interesting, I've been going to see nutcracker for most of my life," She tells me as her face lights up.
"Well, if you go this year, you'll most likely see me on stage," I laugh as I feel my phone buzz I look at the text. "Apparently the movers left already and safe to go home, but I think I'll put off the unpacking for a few more minutes." I laugh and she joins in.
We try to get Owen's room ready first, mostly so she'll get used to it and not have to sleep with us. Ken and I wrestle with building the bed, getting her toys out of boxes and having everything set up and ready to go for her. I'm not entirely sure if she understands that is home now for her, and that will only come in time. I have a feeling that she'll be sleeping with us for the next little while, but one can only hope if we got her room together she would welcome sleeping in it? So Ken and I could also get a good nights sleep that was not filled with toddler kicks and dreams.
Still, it's a little tough managing everything we needed to do with Owen. Shopping, unpacking and keeping her occupied all the while making sure Jack was adjusting well as well.
It was Delaney who stopped by the Sunday, not living too far away and as I answer the door I am a little surprised, trying to keep Jack from jumping all over her in the process because stranger danger is real to him.
"It's still a mess," I apologize. "Jack calm down," I hush him as I pick him up to stop him from jumping.
"You just moved, I think that is the most allowable thing ever. Oh aren't you adorable," she says letting Jack sniff her hand until he is satisfied enough to only grumble at her. She stands for a moment after taking off her shoes, looking around as she looks around zoning in on the photo frame of baby photos. "Oh my is that?" She asks. I had sent a photo of my offspring, but the baby photos were something else entirely.
"That is Elowen," I say nodding my head. "Owen for short of course," I explain further.
"Jesus you were just a baby yourself," She says looking at little sixteen-year-old me holding my newborn in the hospital bed.
"So I was," I say quietly, as I hear the backdoor open and the chatter of a toddler. "That is them," I explain.
Ken is in old jeans and a band tee shirt, he looks older than me of course, but it's not overly noticeable when he's dressed as such.
"Ken this is Delaney, Delaney Ken," I said introducing them. "And this is Owen," I say laying a hand on Owen's head.
"Hello, and hello," She says to Ken first and then to Owen who ended up hiding behind my legs. "I was just in the neighbourhood, and wanted to make sure you get in all right and that if you needed anything or had questions about where to find things in the city?"
"Well, we already hit up Ikea," I laugh as Owen tugs on my arm.
"Mommy, is she a ballerina too?" She whispers.
"I am," Delaney says crouching down. "It's nice to meet you, Owen."
"You too," Owen says quietly before looking up at me. "Can I show you my room?"
"Of course," I tell her. "She wants to show you her room," I tell Delaney.
"Oh that sound fun, lead the way," Delaney tells Owen and Owen takes her back toward the bedrooms to show off her dolls and star war toys. We sit on the floor with her, as Ken walks back and forth doing things and talking to his parents.
"Persis says hello by the way," he says to me at one point and Delaney looks at me curiously.
"His sister, she lives in Japan with her husband. She's older than us," I say simply as I hear Ken curse after something falling. "I should go help him," I say getting up off the floor.
"I should head on home, I'll see you tomorrow?" Delaney says before turning to Owen. "It was lovely to meet you Owen, I hope to see you again?"
"Tea party?" She looks at us, and I laugh and nod my head.
"We'll see," I tell her.
I wake up morning even before Owen, I make a cup of coffee and do a morning stretch until I hear her little feet. We eat some oatmeal and berries for breakfast, having a little mommy daughter time before Ken stumbles out of bed at 7:30 and makes himself coffee and some eggs for breakfast as we sit around the counter. I leave to catch the 8:30 bus to work, so Ken would have the car and the seat for Owen if he needed to go out for anything. Ken kisses me on the lips before I leave for my first day and I take a deep breath and give Owen a hug.
I wasn't nervous, not really this couldn't be any different than the audition, except eventually, I will have to tell them about Owen. I will have to explain that I have a toddler.
I get off at the stop across the street, I pull out my camera and snap a photo of the grey building covered in windows and photos of dancers.
I was here.
Thankfully the morning starts off with class, just like last time.
"Welcome back," I hear when I walk into the studio with my things.
"Thank you," I say blushing as I drop my bags and I pull out my slippers and begin my stretches for the second time this morning.
Delaney waves at me when she arrives and so does Trisha and soon the ballet master and director are welcoming me back and morning class start.
I spent the other half of the morning in the offices where I read mountain paperwork and other things that needed to be signed. I am given an official tour, and a locker as well for my things in the company lounge before we have a lunch break.
We tend to scatter, but I find the apprentices and a few corps dancers in the lounge. I pull out my salad, though I notice a lot of them have a variety of food from leftover pizza to a container of pastries.
"So how was the move?" Nathaniel asks first. He was a corps dancer and graduated from another program I learned earlier.
"Tiring, but we made it," I say simply. "Spent way too much money at Ikea on the weekend that is for sure," I say joking.
"You live with your boyfriend?" He asks almost hesitantly.
"Aye," I say simply and munch on my salad.
"How long have you been together?" Another one asks and I pause for a moment.
"Umm, a little while?" I settle with. "About a year?" Okay, I lie a little bit not wanting to fully out myself and our past.
"And he moved here?"
"Oh yeah, he told me too. I mean any chance to get off the island you take it," I joke another bite of salad. "It's rather dull, after all."
After lunch I am shown where the wardrobe is where a half dozen women are busily sewing away. They greet me with a smile as I walk past them into the fitting room. Measurements, height, and even my weight are recorded. For tights other things that may be boughten for shows. They rattle off my measurements in centimetres so it's not as telling, 86, 66, 98. They measure every inch of my body.
"What is your bra size?"
"Oh umm, 32 C? I say. "Sometimes a B? Umm it depends on the bra, the style I guess. Though I don't know if it means anything…but I did breastfeed for over a year, they aren't exactly as perky as they used to be?" I say quietly.
"You have a child, I would have never suspected such a thing," The head of wardrobe looks up from her paper. Karina was her name and her accent was thick and Russian or maybe Ukrainian?
"I do, she's three," I say quietly. "I have some stretch marks and whatnot on my stomach and hips?"
"Everyone does," She says with a smile. "Don't worry too much, we can always adjust as needed to make you feel comfortable in costumes."
I nod my head and look in a three-way mirror and smile as they drape mesh over me, trying to figure out the best for my skin tone and the colour of maillot that works best for my pale skin as well. It ends with a photo for their company book of measurement.
Next, I talk to the shoe lady who asks a million questions about my favourite shoes, how many I can go through, what I need for ribbons, and elastics. Glue, toe pads and other accessories I could buy for a cost, but still up to me to cover when I needed them. We go through second-choice shoes for pointe, my favourite soft shoes, and general sizes for character shoes, court shoes.
After all that, I am given an order form for M.A.C make-up something we get for shows. Telling me that if I bring the form to the store in the mall they will help me figure out what colours I need if I needed help, or if I already knew what suited my complexion to just write it down. I nod my head and thanked them all. Tomorrow the fun would begin as tomorrow I would begin learning Nutcracker. Where I would learn about snowflakes, waltz of the flowers and the party scene dance as fast I could be fitted for tutu's costumes for it.
I take the bus home, feeling good about my day and when I walk the short distance from the bus stop I smile.
I snap a photo of my new home, it was really home now.
I find Ken and Owen making dinner, well Ken was cooking while Owen was in her enclosed stepping stool watching him.
"Welcome home ballerina," Ken says when he sees me, he sets down the knife, away from our child and comes over and kisses me.