The train ride back to Hogwarts was a peaceful one, and after such a busy Christmas all around the Marauders were actually excited to be returning to the relative normalcy that was school. They made their way into the castle where they immediately caught sight of Lily sitting up in the Gryffindor dormitory as if waiting for everyone to arrive. Remus assumed she was waiting around for the girls but was surprised when she approached him the moment he walked through the door.
"Lily, how are you?" He asked, a little bit surprised but not unhappy when she went in for the hug.
"Good, how was your Christmas?" She asked, pulling back, and examining his face, scanning for any new scars that might have cropped up over the holiday.
"Good…"
"And New Year's?" She interrupted him quickly, as he shot her a caring smile in realizing why she had stayed up to greet him.
"Lily Evans do you have my transformation dates memorized?" He asked, a teasing element to his tone.
"It's not that hard to look up at night and see if the moon is full." She brushed him off, eyebrows knitting when she noticed a fresh scar on his neck, that looked a lot deeper than the others, those that were visible anyway. "Seriously, how are you?" She asked, trying to break through the easy-going smile that Remus had so perfected around anyone but his closest friends.
He had learned very quickly from observing Sirius how to cover up his more revealing emotions, and he preferred it that way. It made people less prone to ask him questions that might lead to dangerous answers, and it had become a force of habit over the years. So, when asked how he was, he answered in his usual way:
"Seriously, I'm fine, me and the folks have it down to a science now. How about you? Did you have a good time with Marlene?"
"Yeah, but I know what you're really asking."
Remus didn't deny it, shooting her a look of concern that she returned with a sad smile.
"It was hard without them, but I suppose it always will be right?"
Remus didn't have a good answer for that, so he brushed some hair behind Lily's ear, and leaned in to whisper something only she could hear.
"Keep your head up, you're the bravest person I know, and you will always have people by your side."
Lily nodded, planting a chaste kiss on Remus' cheek, and pulling back, hands in his.
"Thanks Remus."
He nodded, a strong blush covering his face as he glanced backwards to see a furious James Potter brush past him while Sirius Black patted him on the back with a wink.
Lily snickered a little bit at that.
"I'm sorry Remus, I couldn't help it. I hope I didn't get you into too much trouble."
He cleared his throat.
"Don't worry about it. I can handle James Potter, goodnight Lily."
"Goodnight."
She watched as he approached the boys' staircase, and called to him, causing him to turn around.
"Say, Remus?"
"Yeah?"
"How exactly did James Potter know my favorite candy was Bertie Bott's?"
He smiled sheepishly, letting his ever-growing bangs fall across his eyes, before responding: "Well, maybe someone clued him in."
She smiled back, watching him turn around and go to bed, as she made her own way to the girls' dormitories which would be full for the first time in so many nights.
The next morning Lily heard the familiar hoot of an owl by her window. Her eyes fluttered open, and she opened the window latch to let the bird in, taking the letter from its foot.
The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.
-Alice Walker
I found this quote from a muggle poet today, American surprisingly, don't give up your power Lily. You have more than you know.
All my love,
George
Lily smiled at that, knowing that no matter what disagreements they might have, George believed in her. She thought of all those days he'd spent helping her devise a solution to a disease that most wizards wouldn't even think about curing and felt a warmth fill her chest. Maybe this was what love was, feeling safe with somebody, knowing that no matter what might divide you there would always be something to come back to. She thought it over while she took her shower and threw on her robes for the day and decided that maybe today, she would actually mean it when she returned George's love that day.
She walked downstairs alone, Marlene, Susan and Mary still getting themselves together, and found James Potter already making his way to the portrait hole, his uniform done up far more neatly than normal, which was surprising to her. His hair was still in shambles, but he actually looked like he'd put in some effort that day. As she approached him without drawing his notice, she realized that he seemed to be lost in thought. He nodded at her as their paths crossed but made his way through the portrait hole first without a backward glance, bag slung over his shoulder on his way to breakfast.
As she walked down the staircase, she approached George who was waiting outside of the Great Hall for her wearing a brilliant smile that made her stomach flutter with butterflies she hadn't felt in weeks with him.
"George, hey, how was your trip?"
She asked, jumping into his arms for a hug as he practically lifted her up off the ground in his enthusiasm, drawing her in for a quick and gentle kiss.
"Lily, it was incredible. There's so much beyond Hogwarts, beyond England. People in other countries, they do magic in a completely different way. It's like an extension of their bodies, especially in Italy, and you can't begin to imagine the food. I tried all the normal stuff of course, but they had pickled Murtlap, Hippogriff wings which were rather odd to say the least, and even fried dragon scales. They kept me awake for hours though; they provide an excellent energy boost, dragon scales." He continued on about all the great wonders he'd seen for about five minutes or so before he seemed to remember something and pulled Lily aside from the main entrance to an emptier corner area next to a portrait of Brian Gagwilde III who looked at the two expectantly as they approached him.
George, taking notice of the eavesdropper, turned Lily away from him, and lowered his voice as he said the next bit, so that Lily had to lean in to hear. "Oh, and I learned a lot about our project from some foreign wizards who have been studying it as well."
"Really? Like what?" She asked, but some Ravenclaw boys interrupted their conversation, mussing up George's hair and chattering at him, wanting to hear all about his grand trip around Europe.
"Alright, one second guys. Lily, we'll talk later, ok?" He said, giving her one last kiss, and before she could say anything he was off, enveloped in the throng of his Ravenclaw friends, leaving her to eat breakfast alone. She tried not to think about the fact that he hadn't said that word that had changed everything, aware that he had clearly been distracted by his friends. She made her way to the Gryffindor table where she realized that she wouldn't, in fact, be quite alone. Remus was awake, as was Alice, and James Potter was actually able to carry quite a good conversation with them when Sirius wasn't by his side spouting nonsense.
"It just keeps getting worse." James mumbled under his breath, before showing Remus the cover of the Daily Prophet he had received from his large brown owl when the mail arrived.
Remus glanced up at Lily who had been talking to Alice a bit about their potions lesson for the day before James caught her attention.
"Another attack, four more people missing." Remus explained while James just sat staring at the paper his brows creased into a frown.
"That's nearly ten a week now, missing or otherwise." Alice said, staring at her own copy of the paper with that same frown.
"There must be something we can do, someone that we can go to…" and for the first time in all the years she'd known him Lily witnessed James Potter at a loss for words.
"The aurors are doing what they can…" Alice tried to speak up, but James interrupted her:
"The bloody aurors aren't doing anything! By the time they train up a new batch another hundred people are dead, muggles, muggleborns, perfectly respectable wizards. I'm not wasting my time with them when I graduate, if I have to hunt these death eaters down one by one it's what I'll do."
The group looked at him in silence, but James didn't give them much time to come up with a response, taking off without another word, paper tucked neatly under his arm.
"Is he alright?" Lily asked Remus, who had glanced after him before letting him go, turning his attention back to his eggs and sausage.
"Yeah, that's just Prongs. He gets into these moods sometimes, especially with everything happening. He'll be alright."
Lily nodded but couldn't help continuing to glance at the exit to the great hall, thinking of James Potter, head marauder, complete asshole, ignorant prat, and the James Potter who had just stormed out of the Great Hall because of the injustice facing a group to whom he didn't belong. She couldn't help but think about that boy and have great difficulty reconciling the two versions of him and began to wonder if there was even more to him than someone who could occasionally be bearable and was reasonably good at quidditch. She spent most of the afternoon in that haze of thought, lost in her mind pondering on the character that was James Potter when something Professor Sprout was describing in her Herbology lecture caught her ear.
"That's it." She muttered under her breath.
Remus glanced at her, as she began scribbling furiously in her notebook, writing down a mess of theories and ideas based on the plant that Sprout had referenced. After class ended, she made her way swiftly to the library, engrossing herself in research to the point that she hardly realized she had missed potions class until it was too late.
"Bollocks." She mumbled under her breath as she made her way towards the Great Hall for dinnertime where Susan immediately caught her attention, checking in.
"Lily, are you alright? You weren't in potions." She said, examining her friend as if looking for any obvious damage.
"Yeah, well, I wasn't feeling great. Went to the hospital wing."
She replied.
"Risking detention for a head cold, that doesn't sound like you Evans." Sirius spoke up, having overheard their conversation.
"Look would you guys just drop it?" Lily nearly yelled, sitting down in a huff between Marlene and Susan and across from Remus who looked at her with concern.
"Hey, if something's wrong you can tell me. I am here for you too." Remus said, trying to break through Lily's poorly constructed wall.
She wasn't used to keeping secrets, especially from her friends, and as a result wore her heart on her sleeve far too often.
"Nothing's wrong, honestly Remus, please let it go."
But Remus wouldn't let her off that easy, determined to get to what was bothering her.
"Lily, really, if something's the matter I can help."
"Remus, you're already running around saving your mates' asses all the time. I really don't need you doing it for me, too."
"Understood." He said, the hurt evident on his face though he hid it well. It was his way, and Lily was far too anxious about him discovering what she'd been doing in her free time to notice.
"I'm going to go get some work done, alright Pads? Tell James I'll see him up in the common room."
Sirius nodded, sending a dark look Lily's way, which took her by surprise. She didn't have much time to think on it when James Potter arrived, in a far better mood than that morning, and took Sirius' mind off whatever Lily had done to anger him.
"What do you ladies think?" Sirius said, as Marlene elbowed Lily to get her attention.
"I'm sorry, what?" Lily asked, glancing at Marlene who gestured towards the boys, looking at Lily expectantly.
"About Hogsmeade next weekend? I was thinking we could all go together, make it another Gryffindor outing?"
"Yeah, that's fine." Lily replied, without thinking too much about it, still lost in her own thoughts.
It was then that George caught her attention and she glanced at the boys, saying:
"I've got to go."
"Ooh, have fun with that." Sirius said with a wink as James tried to force a smile.
She ran up to George, planting a kiss on his lips, and absolutely beaming at him as she spoke up.
"I've got it."
"Got what?" He asked, looking confused.
"The part we've been missing. Moonwort." She said, watching as his face turned from one of confusion to great excitement.
"Lily, that's brilliant." He said, pulling her in for another kiss, which led to shouts of "Get a room!" from the Gryffindor table.
Lily rolled her eyes, grabbing George's hand and dragging him towards the library.
"I haven't even told you what I found out on my trip yet, but between that and the Moonwort I really think we can solve this." He said as they ran, pausing outside of the library.
Lily turned to George once again, looking him in the eyes, and with a deep breath saying those words: "I love you."
George smiled wide, bringing her in for another round of kissing, a few of which were less than innocent and caused Madame Pince to insist that they either come in or get their ridiculous display away from her library. Lily and George lapsed into giggles at that, unable to calm themselves enough to enter the library that particular evening. However, the next morning they were all business.
They spent the rest of that week doing more research from this new angle, reading through book after book, and making some good progress. But they quickly hit a wall once again, and by Saturday Lily had grown increasingly frustrated. After another all-nighter spent in the library under the close supervision of Madame Pince, who had never minded some of the prefects staying late into the night as long as they were working on something productive, they had still come up with nothing. Lily woke George in the early hours of the morning after slamming shut her tenth book on the subject of Moonwort in relation to werewolf transformations.
"What's going on?" George muttered sleepily, as Lily ran her hands through her hair before waving her wand, sending the book back to its spot on the shelf with a nonverbal Wingardium Leviosa.
"Pretty impressive." George said, but Lily was not in the mood.
"I just…I don't understand what I'm doing wrong." She said it with such defeat in her voice, and George immediately took her hands in his trying to meet her emerald eyes.
"Lily, you're not doing anything wrong, there's hundreds of books on this subject, maybe thousands. Rome wasn't built in a day."
"You've said that before." She said, finally meeting his eyes with hers.
"And it remains just as important. Please, just take a breath. I'll keep working, you go up to Gryffindor Tower maybe get a shower and a nap, alright?"
Lily glanced at her watch and nodded.
"I guess I should probably shower before the match anyway." She relented.
"Is that today?" George asked to Lily's surprise.
"George, it's Ravenclaw vs. Slytherin, your house's biggest match of the year."
"Lils, you know I'm not one for Quidditch." He said, looking a little guilty at her enthusiasm.
"Yeah, I know, but still, it's exciting. House pride and all that."
George shrugged.
"Yeah, I suppose so."
Lily looked baffled as she began packing up her bag, glancing at George as she asked her next question:
"Do you want me to meet you down here?" She asked, throwing her bag over her shoulder as she prepared to leave for Gryffindor tower.
"Actually…"
"You don't want to go?" Lily asked, even more shocked at this revelation.
"We still have so much work to do, I know this is exciting for you, but my mind would just be elsewhere the entire time." He said, glancing at the stacks of books throughout the library that they had yet to comb through.
"Yeah, I guess so, I'll let you know how it goes."
"Thanks, darling." He said, planting a kiss on her lips. "Love you." He said it like an afterthought, but Lily felt the weight of it. It was still so new, and she cherished it, holding the love that this boy had for her close to her heart the whole way through her morning.
"Potter." Lily said, taking a seat next to him.
"Hey Evans," James replied, hardly glancing her way in his focus on the match.
"Still can't miss a match I see." She said, trying to keep the conversation going.
"And just watch as those birdies practically break the sound barrier, go ahead and try Slytherin you don't stand a chance against those Shooting Stars."
"Padfoot appreciates the support." He said offhandedly.
Lily glanced up at Sirius who was announcing yet again, Marlene in the seat next to him sitting back with her feet up and at least one hand always on him. She at least had the courtesy to give Lily a slight wave when she arrived.
"Where are Remus and Peter?"
Lily knew where her other roommates were, Susan was sitting nearby with the rest of the Gryffindor team, James preferring to sit alone during the match so he wouldn't get distracted. Alice and Mary, meanwhile, had decided to skip this match, not really caring too much if Gryffindor wasn't the one playing. But she was surprised that Remus and Peter weren't up next to Sirius and Marlene, given how uncommon it was to see the Marauders apart from each other.
"Moony's helping Wormtail out with some last-minute studying. He's been having a rough go with charms." James said, brow furrowed as Mulciber grabbed the quaffle and started zooming towards the Ravenclaw goal post.
Lily bit her lip, considering her response before giving it.
"I can always give him a hand, if Remus ever gets tired of helping him out."
James looked at her, a little surprised, but shrugged.
"That would be great, thanks Evans. Damn it." James swore as Slytherin scored again.
"Oh, and another ten points to Slytherin, sorry there Prongsy looks like Gryffindor will be hard-pressed to win the cup this year."
James threw a water bottle at Sirius' head, only managing to hit a Ravenclaw student sitting behind him, McGonagall having learned when Sirius began announcing to stay out of the line of fire. She gave him a stern glare all the same.
"You see Prongs, aim like that is what is going to keep Gryffindor out of the running."
James looked as if he was about to climb the stands to get as his friend, and Lily noticed McGonagall looking ready to throw detentions out if he tried anything. Without thinking she grabbed James' hand:
"Leave it alone Potter." Lily said, and he glanced back at her before rolling his shoulders and taking a seat with a huff.
Sirius had the good sense to leave it at that, getting back to announcing the match.
"Oh, and those birdies score once again, Reggie you better hurry up. As we all know Sammy Boy from the Ravenclaw side is excellent at snatching that snitch, along with other things of the similar vernacular."
"Mr. Black." McGonagall warned.
"What did I say Professor? Honestly you really need to relax more. I can suggest some remedies if you like, old Sluggy certainly has more than just the simple shrinking potion in his back pocket."
As usual Sirius' casual and racy banter with McGonagall elicited much laughter from the crowd. But James and Lily were watching the players rooting for Ravenclaw at every turn, not only just for the sake of rooting against Slytherin but in the hopes that Gryffindor might be able to make up for the blunder that was their first match. After a few minutes of watching Lily turned to watching James, as she so often did during matches. She watched his hazel eyes light up with excitement when Ravenclaw made a particularly good play, followed by a deep focus that suggested he was actually nervous because they would have to find a way to combat against it when it was their turn. It was fascinating how intriguing the boy could be when he was focused on something with such a passion. It reminded Lily of her thoughts from earlier in the week, as well as a particular Christmas gift that she had yet to thank the boy for. She began to consider how she might comfortably broach the subject when an obnoxious voice from two rows up caught her attention.
"And here in the stands, we have Lily Evans taking a particular interest in one James Potter. Like what you see Evans? I can inform you as someone who has lived with James for five years there really isn't much there. He's much better off going stag to the after party if you ask me. Speaking of Slytherins you're welcome to come to the Ravenclaw common room, but I do warn you there will be dear consequences if you do. Prongs and I will make sure of that."
This time James threw something a lot harder at Sirius, actually hitting him in the chest this time. The object turned out to be a dung bomb and the entire upper two rows had to be evacuated as a result amidst cries of:
"Detention Potter!" from McGonogall.
He shrugged the punishment off as usual, focusing once again on the match as Marlene and Sirius continued throwing glances and giggles their way. Lily blushed, and normally would have moved over towards Susan and the other Gryffindors, but she had to get this off her chest before she lost her nerve.
"Hey, Potter." She said.
To his credit he turned his attention seemingly all towards her although Lily could tell by the twitch in his eye that he was itching to keep both his eyes and ears on the match rather than just the latter.
"Yeah, Evans?" He responded.
"Thank you…for the um…" She couldn't exactly get the words out, and James stopped her floundering with a simple:
"You're welcome."
He smirked at having embarrassed the great Lily Evans, but said nothing more, turning his attention back to the pitch. They then spent the rest of the quidditch match watching in silence other than the occasional cheer or groan until they erupted nearly as loud as the Ravenclaws when their seeker Callum Grady caught the snitch. James then began writing furiously in a little notebook that he had been scribbling in occasionally throughout the match before closing it and shooting a pointed look towards Jane across the stands.
He glanced at Lily, clearing his throat a little nervously before she got the message and stood with him. They began walking together towards the castle along with the rest of the students jabbering excitedly about the match. Lily noticed that Sirius and Marlene were not among them and made a note to question her about that disappearance when she returned to their dormitory later. She walked next to James in silence, not really sure what to say without their typical banter to keep the conversation going. And the awkwardness remained for the entire walk up to Gryffindor tower, given Susans' presence in the back debating strategy with their teammates.
Once they finally arrived at the tower James gave the Fat Lady the new password, "Ignis Avis", and moved through the portrait hole with Lily behind him. Before he moved up to his room for a few hours of relaxation before the after party he turned back to Lily.
"Oh, Evans?" He said.
"Yeah, Potter?"
"Lay off Remus, would you? Whatever issues you have with me, he really cares about you. He's got enough going on, doesn't need you icing him out, ok?"
"I…"
"It's ok, we've all done it. He's more sensitive than he seems is all, I'm just letting you know because he'll never tell you himself. See you, Evans."
"Yeah see you…"
So that's why Remus had left the Great Hall so quickly that morning. It hadn't registered in Lily's mind then, but now she felt a tremendous amount of guilt weighing on her at being scolded for her conduct by James Potter of all people. She decided that tonight when she saw Remus at the party, she would have to make things right, but her vow was quickly forgotten when Marlene wandered into the dormitory looking lovestruck.
"Oh, hello did someone have a fun afternoon?"
She said in a teasing tone. Marlene blushed red as the other girls giggled at Lily's teasing.
"Shut up," she muttered under her breath.
"Oh, come on Mar, you don't have to be embarrassed. It's not like you're the first of us to snog Sirius Black." Mary said with a smirk.
After all she and Sirius had a brief but fantastic history all their own. Even Susan had gone on a couple of dates with him early on in fourth year, though it had never gone further than that with them. Marlene threw a pillow at Mary in response, and the group laughed.
"Where's Alice got herself to, Sue?" Lily asked, noting the absence of their fifth member.
"Said she had to send an owl off. I figure once she gets back, we can start getting ready for the party tonight?"
Lily tried to hide her guilty look, but as usual Marlene managed to suss her out.
"Oh, come on Lily, you and George have been at it for weeks. I'm starting to wonder if there's more going on between you two during your little research sessions." She said with a suggestive tone.
"We're getting so close Mar, and I already took the morning to go to the quidditch match."
"With one James Potter if I'm not mistaken." Marlene said.
"It wasn't like that, I just…"
"Whatever Lils, come on you can't convince Georgie to set aside that pesky Ravenclaw intellect for one night of fun? I heard this party's going to be smashing, not like the other one on Halloween."
Marlene didn't mention what she was thinking that this would likely be because George was not involved.
"He won't go for it, but I'll ask." Lily replied.
Marlene and the others shrugged but nodded. They looked up in surprise when their door flew open, Alice making her way in, her nose stuck in the paper.
"What's up?" Lily asked, looking at Alice's furrowed brow with interest.
"They've caught one of the death eaters." She said.
"What?" Lily asked, jumping off of her bed to look at the paper in Alice's hands.
"I'm as surprised as you are. Frank wrote me this afternoon, sent me a copy of tomorrow's paper early."
"Well, read it."
"Alright, alright, keep your hair on."
"Following a horrific attack on a local muggle family,
two adults dead leaving their child Abraham behind, a
call was made and intercepted by a kindly local wizard.
He was able to contain one of the men, until the aurors
arrived. Led by Senior Auror Alastor Moody, they managed
to catch the first of the group who have become known simply
as "The Death Eaters"—
"They really captured one of them?" Mary asked, interrupting.
"It would appear so." Marlene responded.
"Everyone shush." Lily said, prodding Alice to keep reading.
— "Rory MacMillan, Hogwarts alumni and ex-auror turned to
You-Know-Who's side for reasons yet unknown. Although he
has been captured the aurors have yet to release any more
information, and Moody is asking any wizards who have
information about The Death Eaters to 'step up for your
fellow wizards and witches and stop being bloody cowards.
This is a time of great tragedy, but if we all do our part, I'm
sure that we can take down these Death Eaters for good.'"
Alice finished to a solemn moment of silence. The group looked at each other, feelings mixed after hearing about two more murders, even though the perpetrator was captured this time.
"I have to meet up with George. He'll want to hear about this."
Lily grabbed the paper from Alice to great protest and ran out of the room. She left her roommates to continue raving over the article, as she made her way down to the library where George was waiting for her, nose in his books. She shoved the article in his face.
"Did you hear about this?" She asked, although of course he couldn't have heard about it yet given Alice having received the information early from Frank.
"No," George said, furrowing his brow as he skimmed the article. "But it's good news this time at least, they captured one of them."
"Yeah, I guess." She said it quietly, but he heard her, turning her way.
"People are going to die Lily. It is war." George replied, seriously.
"But it's not their war. They didn't ask for any of this; they were just sitting in their home watching the television, and now they're dead. How is their child supposed to live with that, just not knowing why his parents were ripped from him?" She said it with tears filling her eyes.
George quickly picked up on the subtext of her meaning and pulled her into an embrace, rubbing her back soothingly as she sniffled trying to wipe away her tears.
"Lily, I promise it's going to be over soon. The aurors are handling it. The nutjobs behind these murders are all going to be captured any day now. None of it is your concern, alright? But this might just take your mind off it." He gestured to their research.
Lily glanced at it but turned back to George, biting her lip nervously.
"Actually, about that, I was wondering if we could maybe go to the party tonight? You know to celebrate Ravenclaw's win." She was trying to be persuasive, but Lily knew George's response by his face before he'd even said it.
"Lily, I just don't think we have time. We're so close, aren't we?" He said, looking guilty at the disappointment that crossed her eyes.
"I know but…"
"Look, I'll go if you want to, but it's just going to be those boys in your year making fools of themselves. The Marauders aren't exactly my idea of a fun time, especially that Potter." George said the name with a touch of disdain that surprised Lily.
"He's not always as grotesque as he portrays himself." She said, equally surprised at the supportive words now coming out of her mouth.
"I'll take your word for it I suppose. But it doesn't mean I have to enjoy spending time with the bloke." He said.
"It's just I actually watched the quidditch match with him earlier and it was actually pretty enjoyable. He's alright overall, and he even sent me a Christmas gift this year after everything…"
"Never would have expected you to go to bat for James Potter." He said, a hint of suspicion in his tone at Lily's praise for the other boy.
"I'm not, just…" She tried to backtrack, but George shook off the hint of jealousy in an effort to keep the peace.
"Look, he's in your house. You spend a lot more time with him than me, and Remus pals around with him so there's gotta be something there. But I'd really like to spend tonight getting some work done. What do you say?" He asked, his brown eyes pleading with her green ones.
"Yeah, alright." Lily replied, smiling as George shot her that enthusiastic grin.
"Wonderful." He said, dragging her to a seat next to him, and back to a dead end of staring at book after book on another Saturday night.
Around one in the morning Lily decided to call it a night, making her way up to her dormitory where even Alice was missing this time. She flopped down on her bed, a feeling of frustration reaching her at having missed out on another night of fun for something that she would likely never solve in her lifetime. It was foolish to think she could come up with this cure, hundreds of wizards had tried before her after all. And here she was, all of sixteen years old, trying desperately to find a way to help her friend to no avail. Needless to say Lily didn't get much sleep that night, drifting in and out of her restless thoughts just trying to come up with a way to finally cure Remus from his affliction.
Lily woke up exhausted the next morning to the all-too-familiar sound of an owl tapping on her window. She opened it without her usual lovestruck smile, having grown increasingly frustrated with George the night before. This time, rather than providing a quote or word of wisdom the note contained only a quick, simple message.
Lily,
Meet me in the library as soon as you get this. It's urgent.
All my love,
George
She stared at the note, curious, before throwing on a spare jumper and some jeans and making her way downstairs towards the library. She only realized how early it was when she ran into James and Susan standing with the rest of the Quidditch team in the center of the common room, James standing in front of a blackboard drawing diagrams and discussing strategy. Susan gave her a small wave, and James got a rather goofy smile on his face, before covering it with a smirk so fast Lily could've sworn, she was mistaken.
"Morning, Evans, if you're looking for intel for that bloke of yours, I'm pretty sure he's got his head too far up Slughorn's arse to retain any of the information you throw at him."
Lily rolled her eyes, muttering a "shut up Potter" as the rest of the team laughed, save Susan who shot James a stern look.
He shrugged and the last thing Lily heard was "everyone was thinking it." before she slammed the portrait door to the Fat Lady's chagrin.
She made her way quickly down the hall, yawning and stomach rumbling as she realized she was quite hungry. But George said that it was urgent, so she ran the rest of the way, ignoring her gnawing hunger in order to make it to him in good time.
When she arrived in the library, she saw George standing over their usual table alongside a dark-haired boy with hair so thick above his brown eyes it was verging on a unibrow. He was scribbling in a notebook as George made large gestures with his hands, dressed in his best Ravenclaw robes as usual. Lily blushed a bit at that, picking at the hole in the front of her sweater, but made her way forward as confidently as she could, reaching out to pull George in for a chaste kiss.
"Good morning."
"Good morning, darling. Um, Lily, this is Damocles Belby, he's a Ravenclaw."
"Nice to meet you." The boy said, not sounding like it was nice to meet her at all as he quickly shook Lily's hand while keeping his eyes firmly planted on the book, he had been writing in.
Lily caught sight of some of his scribbles and was shocked to see that it was copies of hers and George's research over the last few months.
"George, what is all this?" She asked, looking at him for some sort of explanation.
"Oh, well I was just talking to Damocles last night about what we've been doing. He was up in our dorm as well you see, away from the party and all. And he said that he was very interested in seeing our research, and I really think he could help." George said, seemingly unaware of Lily shaking with rage with each passing word.
"George, can I please talk to you over there for a moment."
Lily gestured to the stacks which in the past had been used for secret make out sessions, but now hooking up in the corner of the library was the furthest thing from Lily's mind.
George began to realize Lily was upset but hadn't the faintest idea why as he followed her obediently to their corner, looking terrified as Lily's anger seemed to engulf her entire body down to the ends of her fiery red hair.
"How could you bring someone else into this?" She whisper-screamed at George as he gulped before trying to move into his reasoning.
"Lily, this isn't only our project, the more minds we can bring in the better chance we have of solving this thing."
"You really think we can trust Belby? He's got the biggest mouth of anyone in your year. At this rate the whole school's going to be jumping down our throats, not to mention the ministry of magic." She argued.
"The ministry of magic isn't going to care about a student project. You're being paranoid. Damocles is a good guy, and an even better wizard. He just wants to help; I don't understand why you don't want more minds on this?"
George wasn't wrong. Lily was being paranoid because the more people who heard about what she was up to the more people might start wondering where she got the idea in the first place. Not to mention what Remus would do once he found out. She and Remus were still on such shaky terms after she'd missed the party the night before and been unable to apologize. She didn't need him being exposed to everyone because of her foolishness in trusting George. But she couldn't tell him any of that, and he was clearly beginning to get frustrated.
"I'm sorry, I know I'm being paranoid, I just don't want the whole world knowing about everything we've worked towards. Can you understand that?"
"Lily, I promise, Belby can keep his mouth shut when it comes to important things. I made sure of it before I brought him in on this. And I really think he can help." He looked at her in that pleading way of his once again, and as usual Lily resigned.
"Ok, alright, let's talk to him."
"Thank you." And George said it with such sincerity that Lily really didn't know how she could deny him, especially the way his eyes looked at her with such warmth and passion that Lily knew he believed in what he said. So she moved over with George to talk to Belby, who looked up at them as if hardly realizing they had even left in the first place.
"Alright, sorry Belby, Lily's just a little skittish with sharing our research." George said.
Belby looked up at that, glancing between the two of them with a nod.
"As you should be, I'm the same way, trust me. I won't be sharing this one with anyone until we're at a good place."
Lily nodded, and after that reassurance she began to feel like things might actually work with Belby helping them. He shared some of his ideas with herself and George based off of their initial research, and it all sounded very reasonable to her. She had half a mind to find Remus and tell him straight away she was so confident in what they'd managed to discover in just a short afternoon of working with the new addition. But that all changed a couple hours into their discussion when Damocles Belby brought up a new idea of his that Lily hadn't considered.
"Now, if we are going to move this thing forward to testing..." Damocles began before Lily interrupted him.
"Testing? You really think it's ready for that?"
"Well, it's not like the test subjects can get any worse, right?" He said, with a chuckle that was shared by George but met with only a frown from Lily.
"Yes, but shouldn't we be testing it on another sort of creature or something…" The boys looked at Lily as if she was speaking a different language. "…just to be safe?" Lily asked, realizing that they were completely baffled by this suggestion.
"Lily, the quicker we get this thing tested the quicker we can get it to market. What does it matter if we lose a few subjects along the way?" George replied, trying to laugh off her suggestion with Damocles as he seemed to be growing frustrated with Lily's insistence. But Lily was not backing down.
"Subjects? You're talking about people George."
"They're not exactly people, though, are they?" Damocles said this with a venom that infuriated Lily. But George held her back, turning to Belby with a frown.
"Damocles, please." He then turned back to Lily, saying: "look Lily, if you're going to test anything some people aren't going to survive the testing phase. That's just the way research works."
"How can you be talking about killing innocent people?" She said, looking more horrified by the minute at George's suggestion that if she tested this potion on Remus as she had intended, he would very likely die or at least be made worse in the early phases.
"It's not a guarantee, just a possibility. Lils, there are dangers with any new potion." George said, again trying to reach her logical side. But Lily was unwilling to see his point of view, mind caught up in thoughts of Remus. George couldn't have known this, of course, which made the situation ever-more frustrating for both of them as they continued to butt heads.
"There must be another way, some other way to test it." Lily said, standing up and beginning to pace around the library. Her thoughts were wild and confused, and she couldn't believe that Damocles and George were just sitting there, acting like nothing was wrong with what they were saying.
Belby spoke up next saying: "If you want to find it, feel free to let us know, but it's just statistics at the end of the day Evans."
George held a hand up, causing Belby to back down, as George tried once again in vain to reach Lily's logical side. "Look at it this way Lily; If we kill twenty werewolves in our pursuit of this cure, we'll be saving hundreds more of the afflicted."
"And besides now those twenty werewolves can't hurt anyone more than they already have, with bitings and the like." Belby spoke up again, receiving a look of frustration from George. But it was too late.
"Bitings?! They don't just go around scratching and biting people, the responsible ones anyway." Lily replied, turning on both George and Belby now with a new vengeance.
George tried to shoot Belby a look, indicating that he should stop, but he couldn't help himself, pulling out one of the books he'd been reading.
"Look here. A history of werewolf kind, there are whole gangs of them, roaming in packs, biting kids. They're monsters Evans, the whole lot of them."
"Well maybe if people didn't treat them so horribly, they wouldn't feel the need to band together." Lily all but shouted causing Madame Pince to shoot the group of three a dangerous look.
George stepped in between the two of them then, trying to grab Lily by the hands, but she shook him off.
"Lily, look, Belby isn't wrong with his points. You know that packs of werewolves are some of the most dangerous, and if we can come up with a cure to their affliction, we can keep them from hurting anyone else. Now, I can understand with your background…"
"My background?!" Lily shouted again, turning bright red now from head to toe.
"Miss Evans." Madame Pince spoke up from behind her desk, trying to end the argument once more.
"I'm just saying, muggles and muggle-borns have a tendency to look for the best in these creatures. You haven't grown up with these attacks reported in every paper, haven't known people who've suffered because of werewolf-kind."
"Believe me George, I'm sure I know far more about this topic than you."
Lily bit her tongue at that, George looking at her with confusion at first, and then simply pity. Madame Pince was still glaring at them, and Lily knew that if she stayed a moment longer her temper would boil over, and she would end up saying something she would really regret.
"Lily, look…"
"I just, I need a break, George. Belby." And Lily took off without another word, stalking through the empty castle, the other students likely spending a lazy Sunday afternoon shut up in their dormitories half-heartedly working on their first bit of homework after the holidays.
Lily made her way back to the dormitory. Sirius Black was sitting in a chair, smoking a cigarette. He was alone, which was a rare occasion. And seemed to be nursing quite the hangover given his even paler than usual complexion and closed eyes.
All the same when he heard her walk in, he responded with his signature Sirius Black style. "Hey Evans, how was date night?" He asked, referring she supposed to the night before given her absence from the party; little did he know her absence had not been a fun one.
She pondered on that for a moment, thinking about the different side of James she had seen the past couple of weeks, and she wondered for a moment if the infamous Sirius Black could have his own side that he might be hiding. She knew from Marlene's brief insinuations that there was more to Sirius Black than Lily had initially thought, but she had never actually seen any proof with her own eyes. Nevertheless, what did she have to lose?
"Sirius, can I ask you something?"
"You just did, but sure go on."
He replied, sitting up in the chair now, and offering his attention in a different way than James. James' attention was always half in a different place. He listened to what you said, but you could see in his eyes that his brain was shooting in a million different directions. Whether those thoughts were about your situation or not Lily couldn't say. But with Sirius, when he gave you his attention, you knew that he was listening. There were no wandering eyes or tapping fingers, his eyes were on you and only you. Sirius Black would listen to what you had to say if it killed him, so long as it didn't take too long.
Lily took a breath before bringing up this next topic, not knowing Sirius all that well. But she needed to ask this.
"It's about…your family."
"Tread carefully there Evans." He replied, though he kept the smirk across his features.
"Remus has mentioned them a couple times, as have you, and they're all blood purists, right?"
"Yeah, you could say that." Sirius said, with a wry chuckle.
Lily took another breath but soldiered on, as Sirius didn't seem angry or disgruntled, but almost…amused.
"Do you ever think that maybe…even if they're saying things that you disagree with, their intentions are just? I mean, that maybe they're just afraid or confused, and maybe we can reason with them?" Lily asked, mind and intentions clearly on someone in her own life, a certain blonde-haired boy who had a clear idea of how werewolves should be treated in the wizarding world based on his own life experience. But Sirius knew how to read between the lines and, unlike Remus and Lily, had little patience for beating around the bush.
"Lily, you have a very good heart and as a result you like to see the best in people. It's actually something I greatly admire about you."
Lily blushed at that, not used to such sincerity from Sirius Black of all people.
"But there are three members of my entire extended family who I don't utterly despise, and only one of those three holds those views. And, God help me, I'm holding out hope for him, foolish as it may be."
"Your brother?" Lily made the connection, thinking back to Regulus' sorting in their second year. She'd been one of the few people in the Great Hall to be surprised at his sorting, noting his last name and features and assuming that an arrogant boy like that would have to end up in Gryffindor like his older brother. "He's in Slytherin, isn't he?"
Sirius paused, before brushing off the question, switching back to Lily's initial concerns.
"Look, Evans, we don't exactly talk, do we? Something's clearly bothering you, and whatever brought this on, you have good instincts. If you care about whoever it is that is saying these things, and you truly think that they just might not know any better, then by all means try and make them change. But in my experience, most people know better, and they don't have any desire to change who they are."
Lily took that into her heart and soul, felt the disappointment of this revelation weigh her down like molasses. Sirius noted that look, having grown quite familiar with that feeling of utter disappointment the last few years of his life. And he did his best to lighten the mood with his next response.
"But, hey, what do I know? I'm not exactly that Gandhi fellow, am I? I'll see you later Evans."
"Yeah, right. Hey, where are you off to?"
Sirius shrugged, pulling James' cloak out of his pocket, and shooting her a wink before he disappeared underneath it. She watched him leave, registering that he'd referenced a muggle, a very famous muggle of course, but a muggle all the same. She realized that she really hadn't talked to Sirius Black one on one…ever now that she thought about it. As much as Marlene cared about him Lily couldn't admit to ever thinking more of him than an arrogant, spoiled boy who hung around with the worst group of troublemakers in her year. But now, thinking about his furious look when she had treated Remus so horribly, and the look in his eye when he shrugged off the comments about his family, she couldn't help but wonder if it wasn't just James Potter who had more to him than met the eye.