A.N. – Sorry, this story is going on and on, but I'm having so much fun with this issue, I can't help it. I tried to put both POV's (D and V) together in the same scene instead of writing them separately as before, or the word count would be even longer. I hope it is not too confusing.

WARNING: M chapter again due to graphic sex scenes, but to be honest, I don't think it is necessary. I won't even put "XXX" marks on. Ha. Nothing in there any 13-year-olds won't see in any film nowadays.

Chapter 89 – A special night?

"Did I tell you how stunningly beautiful you look today?" he said, caressing her cheek with his thumb.

"No, I don't think you did," she replied, sitting up to face him, smiling lightly for the first time that evening. Diego thought that such a light, shy smile was a million times better than the sad face she had displayed all day. "Do I really look beautiful? Stunningly beautiful?"

"Yes, you do." That statement was true, because she looked gorgeous. He wasn't using deceiving flattery, although he worried she could think he was. "And let me tell you: you did a great job with that dress. And with the make-up." Her eye was still a bit bruised, although no longer swollen, and she had covered the remaining purple marks pretty well for the occasion.

"It was a shame my mother couldn't see me today. Or my father. Or my brothers," she said, sulking again, lowering her gaze to her nervous, wriggly hands.

"Yes, and I'm so sorry for that," he said, holding her chin with his index finger, pushing up gently so she would look at him again. "But your brothers couldn't make it from Mexico at such short notice."

"No."

"Your mother was watching us from heaven, though. Like mine. And your father too."

"Yes. And Esteban, all cheering on us."

"Of course."

He let go of her chin, retrieving his hand, but he kept looking at her which such intensity it made her uncomfortable, until she lowered her gaze again, blushing a bit. Don't look at me like that, please, she thought.

"I've been waiting for this for so long, it feels unreal," he said then, dragging his words, almost whispering.

"Yes, I feel the same. Are we really married now, Diego?" she said, looking up again.

"We must be, because Padre Benítez said I could kiss the bride."

He leaned over then and tried to kiss her, but she moved her head slightly to a side and the kiss landed on her jaw. Unfaced, he left a trail of wet kisses all the way to her ear, where he whispered: "Don't be afraid, I'm not going to hurt you."

"I know. Sorry, it's just… I don't know. Maybe if I…"

He held her head locked between his hands and kissed her mouth to silence her words, not using his tongue yet, but his lips lingered on hers for a little while, moistening hers, moving over them very slowly, biting them ever so gently, until she opened her mouth to him. Then, he withdrew, as if he didn't dare to French kiss her, which she thought it was odd, but she didn't complain, because she just had a flashback of that awful kiss that made her retch.

Damn! she mentally cursed, because she had enjoyed Diego's wet, gentle kiss right until then. Get off my head, Tomás, you horrible man!

"Now, back to the dress," Diego said, stroking the ivory fabric over her arm, following it all the way up to her shoulder, sliding his hand down along her back. "It looks brand new now, and it suits you so well… but let me help you out of it."

He helped her with all the fasteners, taking his time, so gently and slowly she thought he would never finish removing all the layers of clothing she was wearing.

For goodness sake, Victoria, aren't you boiling under all these clothes? he thought while fumbling with the third petticoat that puffed up her dress from the waist.

When he finally got her stripped to her lace-trimmed underwear, he stopped, hesitant.

"We have to make this night a special one, remember?" he said, taking her hand for reassurance, although he wasn't sure who needed it more, she or he.

"Yes, we do. So, please, let me help you with your clothes. You also look so handsome in that light blue suit, you know? It is a real shame to have to take it off," she said, reaching for his jacket, but he held her hands still.

"Leave it on then."

"You are not serious, are you?"

He swallowed hard then. He looked so uneasy it made her wonder, because she was supposed to be the one all nervous and apprehensive about this, not him.

"Of course not," he said with a rather tense smile, starting to undo his cravat with one hand.

"Is there something wrong, Diego? Are you all right?"

Other than I'm not sure if Bulgy would come out to play tonight, yes, I'm fab, he thought in dismay. The images of the rape kept flooding his mind, lingering there in recurrent flashbacks he could not push away. Would it help if he banged his head against the wall? Of course not, that would freak her out even more. Oh, shit. What should I do? Shit, shit, shit. My father said it's all the in the mind… Of course it is! If it wasn't all in my mind, playing tricks, I would not have this fucking problem!

"Yes, I'm fine," he said, struggling with the cravat. How was he going to go through this, if he couldn't even get undressed? He tugged at it then, several times, pulling the stubborn knot even tighter.

"Relax, Diego," she said, helping him to undo that knot with both hands while he stood still, freeing his neck from the tight cravat. "Making love is not a strict requirement after a wedding is it? We don't have to do it tonight if we are not ready, you know?"

"No, you are mistaken. We do," he said, removing his jacket, which he threw carelessly over the nearest chair.

"Do we? Padre Benítez said that you could kiss the bride, not that you must kiss me and make love to me tonight."

"Well… technically, no, we don't have to, but… yes, we do."

"Diego, you make no sense! Are you sure you are alright? Do you feel dizzy again or something? Because you are acting so weird today."

"No, I'm fine. You see, there is a reason why I want to make love to you tonight, even if none of us are truly ready for this."

"What reason? To prove that you really love me? I know that. I… I had a stupid moment the other day, and I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have doubted your love, or try to test it after I nearly killed you. Sorry."

"Well, there is that, also, but no, that's not the main issue here. The thing is, I need to make love to you tonight in case you discover you are pregnant in a few days' time, because that child would have half the chance of being mine if we make love now. At least, I want you to have a reasonable doubt about who the father is. Do you understand?"

She thought about it for a little while, frowning in concentration while he unbuttoned his shirt.

"I see. That's why you were so keen to get close to me so shortly after it happened, when I wasn't ready at all for any kind of physical contact with anybody. When I freaked out and fired that gun. Why didn't you tell me your true intentions back then? Because it didn't make sense to me that you were so callous, so keen on sex right after… Oh, gosh. At least your odd insistence makes sense now." She smiled then, caressing his muscular, bare chest as he removed the shirt, only gently now, without the urgency she showed the last time.

"How could I tell you? I was quite embarrassed. But we said tonight would be the night, so it must happen, because we are running out of time," he said embracing her, lowering her down on the bed while he kissed her neck, all the way up to that sensitive area behind her ear, that spot that usually drove her insane with desire.

That move should have got her wet as a melting ice cube. She didn't understand why, but tonight, her vagina was tight, and as dry as the desert sand. Shit. At least she was glad Diego would not notice that until the time to penetrate her. So, she still had some time to get rid of all the disturbing thoughts and feelings that prevented her from enjoying those wonderful, skilled kisses.

He removed her underwear then, leaving her completely naked, and started licking her breasts, a bold move that should have set her sex on fire, but nothing was happening down there, and no gush of fluid made her cosy cave ready for him. Oh, God, now I understand why he gets so upset when he can't get an erection. Shit, shit, shit. What should I do? Pretend. Yes, pretend and carry on.

She moaned then, and he carried on kissing her all over, paying special attention to suck her sensitive nipples, something the rapists didn't get to do. Thank God Tomás didn't spoil that for me as well as everything else! she thought. But she still couldn't enjoy it fully, tense as a board. Why? Why? Oh, shit. Pretend. Pretend! she urged herself.

She moaned again, arching her body while messing up his luscious, black hair. Why the hell could she not relax and enjoy this for real? Why? At least, her nipples decided to play the game, budding nicely for him. Flat nipples would have been noticeably worse. Shit. I can do this. I can do this, she repeated herself with her eyes closed, like a mantra, to keep her mind occupied, free from the horrid memories.

He stopped for a moment to look at her again and asked her, hesitantly.

"Are you all right? Should I carry on?"

"Yes. It's all in our minds, Diego. We can do this."

"That's what my father…" Oh, shit. No! Shut up! Diego thought, mortified by his near-blunder.

"Your father what?"

"Nothing," he said, kissing her again into oblivion so none of them could say a word for a while.

Through that kiss, she couldn't help but recalling again the contact with that revolting mouth and tongue. For goodness sake! This is Diego, the man I love, no that maldito cabrón! Go away, you rotten bastard! Arggh! She wished he would go back to her breasts, but no, he lingered there for a while, exploring every corner of her mouth. Please, please, please, don't gag. Don't gag!

Right when she thought that retching was inevitable, he left her mouth to look at her one more time. She made the most of the occasion to push him away from her, making him lie on his back, and then she got on top. Good choice, because I wasn't on top when that happened. That felt different. She was in control now. I can do this. I can do this, she kept repeating to herself as she left a trail of wet kisses down his chest.

He lay on his back, trying to relax and enjoy her kisses while caressing her hair with one hand, but he was still too tense. Although getting aroused, he wasn't quite there yet, and she was getting dangerously close to that area now. Shit. But she skipped it and turned to remove his shoes first. And his socks. And then she fumbled with his trousers and pulled them down, past his feet, throwing them on the chair, on top of his jacket. She straddled him again, and he pulled her torso towards him to find her mouth. She offered some resistance, obviously not too keen on more kissing, so he sat up to find her breast while kneading her gorgeous, firm buttocks. She seemed to enjoy that, because she arched her back, moaning again. Oh, God, please, let me do this. Get those disturbing images off my mind, please!

She moaned again, happy she had dodged that tongue off her mouth. The touch of his hands on her arse felt so good… why couldn't she relax and enjoy it, for fuck sake? Would she have to pretend till the end, faking and orgasm and all? She didn't know how to do that. She never had to do that! All her orgasms were real, very real, and he always made sure she had one. Or several. Shit. But… wait a minute. She was straddling him, on her knees, and she could not feel… Shit. Was he also pretending again today? What a pair of fools!

She pushed him away from her one more time, so he lay on his back, and moved to a side to remove his underwear, throwing that last piece of clothing to the floor. She stared at his half-erected penis, wondering if she should graciously retire from the game or force herself on him to help him up and carry on with the charade.

He looked at her with an apologetic, lopsided smile, and shrugged his shoulders.

"Bulgy doesn't want to play today either. Sorry."

"Oh, Bulgy, my dear… why is that? Come on, come out and say hello," she said, grabbing his half-boner, giving it a try. They had agreed before this should be a special night, so she had to try her best. At least try. And then give up.

He closed his eyes as she worked on him, trying to relax and leave his mind blank, enjoying the moment. She used her hands first, but then she came down on him, using her tongue, and finally her whole mouth. That contact made the trick, resulting in the so longed-for erection.

"Here you are, Bulgy! Fantastic!" she said, looking at Diego triumphally, partly because she had managed to do the job, and partly because she had done so without gagging. But she wasn't going to tell him that.

"Nice, thank you. Well done. You are a natural, you know?"

He embraced her then, and they ended up rolling on the bed, frolicking while both pretended to laugh and enjoy the situation. He stopped on top of her, panting with a hint of real desire, grabbing her wrists as he liked to do, in that dominant way she also enjoyed, holding her arms above her head. A very bad move that night, of course, because she looked at him in fear then, unable to pretend anymore.

"Oh, sorry, no, I didn't mean to... Sorry," he said, letting go of her wrists. The fear in her eyes and the awkwardness of it all, resulted in an instant deflating that sent him back to square one, with a half-boner. Oh, for fuck sake! He rested his head on her shoulder then, nearly crying. "I'm sorry."

Well, at least he could try to please her and give her an orgasm without penetrating her.

He checked with his finger, and he found none of the plentiful moist she usually welcomed him with. That night, she was as dry as yesterday's bread, pretending just like him. It wasn't only him who was in trouble here, only that the shape of his male anatomy made the mental blockage much more obvious. He prodded a bit deeper, searching for moisture, but then she flinched in discomfort, moaning in pain.

"We are in trouble here, aren't we?" he said, withdrawing his finger. "Shit."

Victoria looked at him with deep sadness, and she started crying one more time.

"I'm sorry. I tried! But I can't. My body is not ready for this, nor my mind, but I really tried."

"So did I. I tried, and I failed."

Damn it. He sat up at the edge of the bed and put his underwear, trousers, and boots back on quickly. He stood up while donning the shirt, and ignored Victoria when she called him. He just had to get out of there as soon as possible and hit something, quickly, or he would lose it.

"Diego, don't go. Where are you going? Come back here!" Shit.

He got out of the bedroom without looking back at her, and she carried on crying, burying her face on the pillow. Damn you, Tomás! Maldito seas por siempre jamás!

ZZZ

After a reading session in bed by candle light, with his clothes still on, Don Alejandro fancied a late night, relaxing herbal infusion before he went to sleep. While wondering what could be going on in Diego's bedroom, he headed for the kitchen. He was greatly surprised when she found Victoria there, using a little tea strainer to pour her own, freshly made chamomile infusion into a cup. She had covered her shoulders with a shawl, wearing only her nightgown, walking barefoot, like someone who had just got out of bed briefly and had the intention of coming back to it quickly.

"Victoria, what are you doing here? Is everything all right?"

She looked at him through her red, puffy eyes. She wasn't crying then, but it was obvious that she had been, very recently.

"Victoria, my child, don't cry, please. What's wrong? Where is Diego?"

She shrugged her shoulders then, and she lowered her gaze back to her cup. Fresh tears slid down her cheeks then.

"He left."

"He left? Why? Where? Please, tell me what happened, from the beginning. I want to help you. Don't be shy, tell me."

"Don Alejandro, I wanted to go back on the horse today, as they say you should do immediately after a fall, but I couldn't. It is too soon!" she said, blaming herself for the situation, rather than Diego, unaware father and son had that conversation about their erectile dysfunction before.

"Go back on the horse? Well, I must tell you that's one of the most stupid sayings ever. When I fell of "Imperioso" a few years ago, my lower back was so sore it took me ages to ride a horse again, any horse. Months. I was driving the carriage instead. And, it took me even longer to overcome my fear of that particular crazy horse. It took me nearly a year to ride him again."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. So, don't worry, hija mía. You both need time. After this terrible thing that you shared, it's going to take a while to get back on the horse, as you put it. I can imagine a few months of using a carriage for you two, because you've been injured, like I was, but you'll get there, eventually. No need to rush it."

"Thank you, Don Alejandro, that's makes me feel much better."

"Would you drop the Don Alejandro, por favor? You are finally my daughter, officially now, so please, stop the formalities."

"Sí, Alejandro. Or should I say… Father?"

"Yes, that's better. Now, where is my idiotic son? I think I should have a chat with him again, and maybe whack some sense into his head."

"I don't know where he went, he just left. He left me there on my own, in his room. He didn't say a word."

"All right, I'll find out where he is. Don't worry. I'll bring him back to apologize even if I have to drag him by the ear!"

ZZZ

Don Alejandro tried the cave first, but Diego wasn't there. Well, of course, because he would not use the secret entrance at the library now, as reluctant as he was to step into that room. Next, he looked in the back garden, and then at the front one. He wasn't there, but from the main entrance he heard a thumping noise. He looked in the stables, and he wasn't there either. The intermittent noise persisted, closer then, and now he could identify it: someone was chopping wood with an axe.

"Diego, por el amor de Dios, what are you doing?" he said when he finally found him.

His son was furiously whacking large pieces of wood behind the barn, in the dark, by moonlight, working up a sweat on his unbuttoned, expensive white shirt.

"It's this or whacking someone, Father," he said, lifting with both hands the biggest, heaviest axe he had found in the property, hitting the next, big piece of wood with a mighty blow. Don Alejandro involuntarily jumped, startled by the force of that wallop, stepping back a bit. "And, as I already killed Tomás, if I go to the pueblo now and beat the other bastard to a pulp, I'll have no excuse for it and I'll rot in jail."

"Come on, stop the nonsense. I can understand you need to vent your frustration, but you are going to hurt yourself. You can't even see what you are doing here, in the dark."

Diego ignored him, discarding the pieces of wood, placing another log on the thick, tree stump they used for that purpose.

"Leave me alone, Father, please," he said, whacking that piece of wood so hard this time, the massive axe got stuck in the tree stump after splitting the huge log in two. Diego fought with the handle for a few seconds, until he retrieved the massive, sharp, heavy blade. Don Alejandro was impressed. It would have taken him at least three or four blows to cut that piece of wood. Diego only needed one, as furious as he was.

"This is not healthy, Diego. Come on, calm down and give me that. This is not the time to provide firewood for the entire pueblo until the next year."

Diego didn't hand him the axe voluntarily, so the old don grabbed the handle as well. Diego still didn't let go, and they struggled with it, pulling from it in opposite directions.

"Let go of that axe!" Don Alejandro cried.

"You let go!" Diego replied, pushing his father's chest with the thick, wooden handle, making him lose his balance. The old don recovered fast, though, and grabbed the axe again, wrestling with his son one more time, which was a quite stupid thing to do, because he wasn't near as strong as him.

"Give me that I said!" Don Alejandro cried in the end, slapping his son hard with a mighty bofetón. Diego was so surprised to receive one of those again, he let go of the axe's handle, which the old don was holding only with his left hand then. Gravity made the tool's long handle slid in his hand and he dropped the heavy axe, nearly hitting his right foot with that huge blade, that sank in the hard soil with a thud. Shit, this is much heavier than I thought, he marvelled, wondering how Diego could handle that axe as if it was a light toy.

"No, you give me that! You are the one who's going to hurt himself!" Diego said, taking the heavy tool off his father's hands again. "Are you all right?"

Don Alejandro only nodded, mesmerized by how close he had been to losing his foot.

"Why did you hit me? What the hell do you want from me now, Father? Can you just leave me alone for once in your life?"

"I want you to calm down and stop behaving like a twat, Son. That's what I want. Why did you leave Victoria like that? Don't you want to know what she is doing? Don't you wonder?"

Diego left the blade on the ground, resting the wooden handle on the tree stump.

"What is she doing? She's not… Mierda, don't tell me she had done something stupid," Diego said, suddenly alarmed.

"Not as stupid as you, no. I found her in the kitchen, crying over a chamomile tea."

Diego sighed then, relieved.

"For a moment, I thought she had tried to… Oh, God. You are right, I'm such an idiot."

"This idiotic display is something I could expect from Esteban, not you."

"We were not that different, you know?"

"No, you were different. And you were supposed to have some sense. Come on, leave that axe, go back to the house, and apologize to Victoria right now. And, don't worry: if you don't make love today, for whatever reason, it would not be the end of the world. She may not be pregnant at all, and if she is, we'll love that child all the same. End of, all right?"

Diego nodded then, sheepishly.

"Sorry I hit you, but I didn't know what else to do to get you off your trance."

"I'll never get used to your bofetones, Father. Thank you, though," Diego said, with a hand on his red, sore face, heading back to the hacienda.

ZZZZZ

A.N. – The "real" last instalment of the 50 shades of Zorro is on the way, don't fret! Again, this chapter was too long to carry on here, already over 4000 words, sorry.