Chapter 7
This chapter had the Mikoto scene added and the other part to flesh stuff out.
Konohagakure, Late November..
The Academy starts in the spring, while enrollment begins in the winter, which is all I remember on it. Several small things eluded me about the world that tended to get vexing to me. I had made the risk of writing some things down in the event that I started to forget events. I was certain that no one would ever decipher anything I didn't want them to. It's rather difficult to translate a bastardized amalgamation of Latin, English, and German.
Much of it wasn't even the most grammatically correct, but nobody here could tell me otherwise. I then encoded it with references only I would get. I could not afford to have this discovered, Hiruzen would likely think it was the Kyuubi trying to drive me insane.
He was already worried about me rambling on in English when my brain was still scrambled. I didn't need to make crap harder for him.
Between Kyuubi mind shenanigans or dimension jumpers, I'd definitely think I was crazy.
What made this difficult was that I didn't speak these languages as often. I talked with Rin in English when we were alone at home, which was good, but the bits of Latin I knew was difficult, and so was German. I had to talk to myself and have imaginary conversations to keep up my understanding of the two languages.
Hopefully Rin doesn't think I'm losing it.
I'd been going stir crazy since my physical training was brought to an end temporarily. I still did basic katas and jogging around our neighborhood, with a bit of chakra exercises for personal entertainment, specifically blowing up leaves by putting too much chakra in them,but the theoretical and book knowledge that Hiruzen's books gave me wasn't enough. He flat out refused to give me any books on sealing until I was in the Academy.
I probably shouldn't have said I heard about sealing from ninjas talking about exploding tags. Made me sound explosion happy.
I still sometimes did some training with Kakashi, but it wasn't until after over a month of waiting. He'd evidently been injured on a mission and took some time to recover from it.
Mostly, it consisted of learning how to make fires without chakra, looking for animal tracks, setting up snares, etc. Things that the Academy didn't exactly cover. I could tell from his surprise that he thought I was an exceptional learner when it concerned surviving in the wilderness though.
But he shouldn't be, I already knew this stuff. Tracking deer, skinning a squirrel, fishing, I knew it. Some things never do get forgotten. I focused more on listening instead of talking to him, having still felt disgusted with myself for what I pulled when I mentioned his eye. I knew I would get a rise out of him. I knew he'd react badly.
But I wanted him to hurt as much as he'd hurt me by intentionally being lazy in telling me the basic stuff needed for certain types of training. I'd had a nightmare of Rin having her half of Kurama ripped out of her, and I could do nothing to save her.
So on that day, I did every single thing I could think of to piss off Kakashi. I acted like how an arrogant, self righteous bastard would. I did it so his punches and kicks would come harder and with less mercy.
The pain makes me think of something other than potential failure.
The angry reaction I expected occurred. But something else happened afterwards. I could still see and hear, even if I looked out of it. My sensing was pretty advanced and I could feel his chakra spasming in a way that Rin's did after I tried to leap from the roof of our apartment to the next one and fell down to the ground, smacking my head against the road and getting a concussion.
He was terrified.
That was the reason I never brought up the subject again. I genuinely hurt him by bringing it up, so I never did it afterwards.
The only thing out of the ordeal that I gained that wasn't confirmation on what someone's chakra felt like when they were terrified was that I could still sense chakra when I was unconscious, which I did when Rin was shouting my name to try and wake me up.
Much of my free time when I wasn't training or teaching Rin was me doing stupid crap to entertain myself. That caused me to realize the reason canon Naruto did pranking. He had too much energy. I felt like the energizer bunny and was a constant menace to the market place and civilians that tried to be jerks to us.
Sometimes I'd torment Rin, as all good older siblings ought to do, most of that consisting of me "talking crazy". Changing accents in "our" "special language", evidently constituted crazy talk. But in my defense, it's not my fault she wasn't blessed with the understanding of how beautiful the context of "Hello there" was in the English language.
So uncivilized. I thought. That gets me thinking, I'm gonna have so much fun when I can pull off a henge and shadow clones.
Why is he being an idiot again?
Rin thought.
She knew she was no idiot. Her brother just happened to be very smart. There had been times where she thought he was crazy, but she could tell, in his eyes, that he just loved to mess with people. Mainly her.
She couldn't wait till the Academy. There, he would have someone else to torment other than her with his crazy proclamations of the "High Ground". That didn't even scratch the surface of his intentional madness. Calling Kami "The Log", singing at the top of his lungs about "Erika", whatever the heck that is, or talking to himself in his own made up languages. She knew he was doing it to her on purpose.
This is his revenge for me asking him about training all the time.
Training was a sore subject for him. Any time she'd ask how his training was going, he'd get a flash of annoyance, before telling her they had to wait some time before they could go to the next level. He did his best to explain the things in the books jiji gave him, but some of it required context.
He'd try to use examples that were lost on her. She saw how hard he was trying. He genuinely cared and wanted her to understand things that would help her be an amazing kunoichi. But she could tell the lack of training for him and her need for help was grating on his nerves.
Maybe I could convince jiji to give us some books Naruto would like.
Hiruzen read Inoichi's psych report on Naruto with a look of irritation on his face. Apparently, Naruto found it highly amusing to talk either like a certain spandex wearing jonin in Konohas' employ, or in the third person. Inoichi said he likely knew why. The mind sessions had mostly ended. Only a bi-weekly appointment for his yin chakra was done now.
Aside from being very dense, there were no more issues surrounding his chakra. Inoichi believed Naruto acted comically around him to hopefully draw attention away from certain behavioral traits that were more noticeable in his body language. Most of those included a more alert pose when sitting down, softer footsteps, and an inclination to look around in every direction.
Most of the time, it would point to severe terror or post traumatic issues, But Hiruzen knew better. Those traits also get ingrained in Shinobi after a few years of applying their trade. It's no suprise that Naruto adopted those traits when he underwent the closest thing you could get to entry level ANBU psych training without going through the actual training. The Yamanaka clan head didn't know Naruto was getting trained.
Inoichi, you're a good mind doctor. But you sometimes look too far into things. Naruto might be bright, but he's still six. You've been pranked.
"Try and drive a shrink to drink' he says." Hiruzen muttered to himself. "Inoichi is going to feel like a fool when he finds out."
But the irritation he had wasn't from Inoichi's report. It was why the report had Naruto's behavior in it. The boy was, quite simply, bored. Hiruzen saw how depressed Naruto got when he discovered how much of a waste of time it would be for he and his sister to try chakra control exercises this early on.
The boy was so in need of entertainment that he goaded an ANBU Captain into lashing out.
Every time he made a little comment, every time he called his trainer "failure", he was saying he wasn't fazed by the training that would have been considered torture by other six year olf.
Kakashi, being the way he was, possibly didn't realize it.
But thankfully, concerning Kakashi, the month of leave he received had improved his mindset, including when he resumed his duties in the ANBU.
Hiruzen wasn't blind to the reports from the other ANBU about how Kakashi had almost been caught out and nearly killed because he tried to intervene constantly to protect his squadmates, even to the detriment of his own safety.
Even Itachi had come to him to discuss his concern for Kakashi's well-being, the young Uchiha clearly concerned by the acts taken by Inu.
But, the forced leave had a noticable improvement on the silver haired man. So it turned out to be worth the hassle.
The thoughts concerning Kakashi had Hiruzen being contemplative about Naruto. Specifically, why and how he was able to stab at the festering wound that was Uchiha Obito and Nohara Rin.
It is disturbing how close Naruto was on reading Kakashi. Hiruzen could see the smirk appear on Naruto's face when Kakashi made the comment about his sister.
He wanted a reason to hurt Kakashi. Why though?
That was when Hiruzen remembered something. Something that he had overlooked when he first thought of this.
Naruto showed no surprise when he met Kakashi in my office.
Hiruzen knew that strong enough sensors could indentify specific chakra signatures at close range. That would include the body and specific parts.
His Sharingan has a different signature to the rest of him. Naruto probably noticed it and wanted to know why.
It all made sense now. Naruto had not trusted Kakashi. That's why he kept staring at him. That's why he was acting like such a brat around Kakashi, but changed back to his normal and polite self when he was around anyone else. That's why he gauged Kakashi's reaction to calling him a friend killer.
He was almost on point to Kakashi's fear. Either he knows Kakashi, which is unlikely, or he used himself as a reference point, knowing that he personally would respond terribly to being told he was responsible for his sister's murder.
Hiruzen groaned at this realization. "If I'm right, he can dissect people's thoughts and motivations as good as a Yamanaka. I need to speak with Inoichi. But first," he said, reaching into a drawer to pull out a small bottle of sake, "I need a drink."
Filling up a cup, he saluted to himself, "To Uzumaki Naruto. You precocious little gaki." he said, before he downed the drink.
"Scram, you little shit." A merchant threw an object at my face, but I ducked it to avoid it hitting my face. "Get out of here."
Today was when I decided to risk going to the market, hoping a new person outside of the village would pedal their wares that I could potentially buy.
Evidently, this guy recognized me.
"Fuck you too." I snarled, baring my teeth at the man. "There's no Yondaime to save you again."
Much to my enjoyment, my canines and whisker marks were close enough to what a fox's was that the bastard flinched away from me when I said that.
Fuck laying low. I was tired of these absolute pricks giving Rin and me trouble for being Jinchuriki. If they believed I was Kurama, then I'll respond appropriately.
Flipping off the merchant, I stomped away and gritted my teeth, feeling everybody's eyes on me.
Fucking pissants. I growled internally, feeling my chakra swirl in my tenketsu from how angry I was at what I was being subjected to. Useless bags of meat that will beg me to save them when Hell shows up at their doors.
I was pretty damn curious what they'd think if I told them to pound sand when Pein shows up, or any other threat that I was going to be forced to fight.
Still not calmed down at all, I paid no mind to anybody else in the street until I came across a crowd of people and was forced to squeeze through to get home.
Ducking under the adults, I almost slipped through until I walked straight into a woman, a soft oof escaping her as I stumbled.
"Fuck off." I growled preemptively, knowing I was going to be called a demon by the woman as I looked up at her.
A huff escaped said raven haired woman, her dark eyes narrowed as she looked down at me.
"Don't use such language. What would your mother say?"
My teeth clenched as I kept looking at her, a vague familiarity to her that I couldn't shake off.
"Kind of difficult to be mad at your son when you're in a grave." I remarked coldly, the woman's eyes widening.
She was much taller than me, but she knelt down and set down the bag she was holding, filled to the brim with fresh vegetables, including some tomatoes.
Her eyes were level with mine now and she focused on my hair, her face turning even paler than what she was.
"Uzumaki Naruto?" She asked kindly, the emotion completely foreign to me when coming from a stranger. Most of them were either hostile or benignly negative.
I didn't trust her at all. I didn't know her, and my senses screamed to avoid her. Something was wrong with her, like the Uchiha police when I sensed them.
"Please, don't run." She requested, probably noticing how I tensed up I was in preparation for a hasty retreat. "I knew your mother."
My mind froze as I heard that, my eyes focusing on her face, hair, and eyes...
They were like many of the members of the Police Force.
This was Uchiha Mikoto.
"Tell me your name." I said quietly, daring her to lie to me as I levelled as strong of a gaze as I could manage.
She didn't seem fazed, continuing to smile reassuringly.
"My name is Mikoto. Your mother and I were very close friends when we were young."
I don't know why, but an image flashed through my mind when I thought of my mother, causing my breath to catch.
Sasuke with a Chidori, ramming it into my chest. Then, it was Rin.
Uchiha. They would almost drag Konoha into a civil war within two years. Danzo would facilitate it further, and Obito woul-
I started doing everything I could to sense around me, trying to feel for that accursed signature that haunted me sometimes.
He might be hiding, ready to take me.
Shut up. I snapped to myself, not having said a word to Mikoto since she introduced herself.
I could almost just say that I knew about certain things. I could warn her, protect her, save innocent lives. All I needed to do was speak.
But why was my mind rebelling against the notion?
Terror started to creep up on me as I started to think of the implications if I tried to warn Shisui or Itachi. I knew I was being watched right now, and maybe Mikoto's friendship with my mom shielded us from anymore scrutiny.
They would come for me if they suspected anything.
"Jiji said to not talk to strangers." I said slowly, turning and running away from Uchiha Mikoto, killing my chance of trying to change something for the better.
I ran... And ran... And ran.
My feet almost hurt as I collapsed at the steps of our apartment, a stitch in my side and my breaths coming in gasps, not only because of running.
I was a coward; a craven and contemptible person that didn't warn an innocent woman of a danger in the future.
But my fear and hatred was too much. I hated that the police stood by and let villagers speak ill of me. A few even joined in, barely hushed whispers of how impulsive and feral I acted in response.
It made me hate them, and the vision of what Sasuke could possibly become was something I couldn't shake.
Was it better to let them simply die?
"What is wrong with me?" I shivered, horrified that I even thought that.
What kind of diseased part of me just thought that? I couldn't have just thought that.
I jumped up, wrenching the door open and practically running to mine and Rin's room, feeling her presence there.
Pushing the door open, I walked towards where she was on our bed, reading, and layed down next to her.
"Naruto, are you okay?" She asked, her violet eyes wide in concern.
"Stupid villagers." I said, not wanting to say I ran from somebody who genuinely cared about us in some way. "I said something terrible to them."
Rin set her book down and wrapped her arms around me, pulling me close to try and calm me down..
"I forgive you." She whispered, pressing her face against my shoulder. "You know it was wrong, so it's okay."
Just like that. She believed me and tried to help me without knowing any detail at all.
But I don't. I wanted to say, feeling nauseous at the realization. It frightened me that I caught myself wanting them to die.
And I wasn't talking about the civilians only... It was the Uchiha as well.
"I wished they were dead." I said shakily, disgusted with myself, "I wanted them to just... die." I finished hollowly, not knowing what else to say.
Rin, my darling and beautiful little sister, did what any loyal and good sibling would do, and took my side.
"Maybe you're right." She replied, whispering it in my ear with a touch of uncertainty.
Sometimes, there are moments that define us and act as a point where multiple paths separate, almost like a spiderweb of cracks running through a pane of glass.
This moment, where my own hatred that I struggled to control was potentially colouring my sister against people, was one of them.
Despite feeling betrayed by Kakashi in some ways, my hatred towards the merchants that denied me the proper food to grow and be strong, and my overall hatred at the shit hand I'd been dealt in life, I could not let Rin be turned into me.
I wouldn't let it.
She would never know anything more after this. I would lie about Uchiha and other people being nice to me. I can't destroy the light I see in her eyes...
The same kind I saw in Kaasan's as she whispered my name before she died.
My own arms gripped Rin a little tighter and we both laid down, entangled with one another as I slowly relaxed with her chakra shining brightly next to me.
"I love you, Rin." I whispered, kissing the top of her head.
I didn't know how long we stayed like that, but it was something I definitely needed, if only to know I wasn't alone.
Mikoto was quiet that night, finishing up washing the dishes while Sasuke was in bed. Her eldest and her husband were in the other speaking about something, likely concerning ANBU missions that Itachi had started doing, and she was just... on her own, pondering what it meant that Uzumaki Naruto was frightened of her.
She might have semi-retired from Ninja duties once Itachi was born, and fully so when Sasuke was, but the training and ability to detect subtle emotions from body language and the eyes were still there.
The boy knew precisely who she was.
Had she been able talk with him in a less hectic environment, she might have managed to reach out to him. But they were all being monitored.
Itachi had confided in her first, not Fugaku, that the Uzumaki boy was receiving some training from Hatake. The Sandaime mentioned to Itachi that it was unfortunate that opinions restricted him from finding another that could train the boy, obviously hinting that Itachi was the second choice.
It meant the old man still trusted them to not be a threat. Sarutobi Hiruzen was an uncommonly sharp and intelligent man; he had to be to survive to his sixties. Anything he said to Itachi would go straight to Fugaku, and that meant Sarutobi wanted Fugaku to know that they were still trusted by him at least.
Right as she nearly finished, her husband entered the kitchen and stood right behind her, looking over her shoulder at what she was doing.
"I'm told you encountered one of the Jinchuriki?" He asked, resting his chin on her shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her.
A faint smile appeared on her face at the action. Fugaku wasn't the most expressive of people, but he made an effort for her sake.
"I tried to talk with him." She said, putting another plate on the counter. "He was in a panic already, so he ran."
Fugaku grunted at that.
"Are they certain he wasn't compromised after he was nearly killed? An unstable Jinchuriki is the last thing we need, and I doubt the Hokage will do what is necessary."
Mikoto turned around, giving her husband a serious look.
"Remember who you are talking about, husband," Fugaku flinched at her tone, "You agreed we would try and care for them after Kushina died. You agreed." She reminded him.
No matter how much Fugaku pleaded with her to not ask to raise them, she did so anyway following the Kyuubi being unleashed. He stood by her as any husband should, and had multiple conversations with Sarutobi about it.
It was the first time they both realized the growing distrust of their clan in the eyes of the village when they were rejected repeatedly.
"I'm sorry, Mikoto-chan." Fugaku reached out and caressed her cheek, looking apologetic. "I should have worded it better. These past few weeks have been stressful."
Their eldest was doing well in the ANBU, but he was still an 11, almost 12, year old boy. Of course Fugaku would be stressed from trying to help his son as best as he could.
"I can have some of the Police Force look out for him," Fugaku offered, trying to be helpful, "I can explain it away as keeping the Jinchuriki safe from antagonization."
It was plausible enough, and hopefully, Uzumaki Naruto would be less skittish.
"Thank you." Mikoto smiled, giving her husband a peck on the cheek. "Now let my finish the dishes." She turned back around and continued washing, happy with the change in events.
"Erase his memories." Hiruzen ordered, nodding at Inoichi.
"No!" I screamed, trying to break away from the restraints. "I'm not crazy! I'm not crazy!" My wrists burned as I tried to break away.
Inoichi's chakra shook and I started screaming louder.
"Everything is true." I sobbed, impotently begging for them not to. "Please, don't do this."
"It will be fine, Naruto." Hiruzen tried to soothe me, not working at all. "The Kyuubi is manipulating your memories. You will be fine shortly."
I felt Inoichi's hand touch my face, everything being pulled and ripped away, leaving nothing left of the Self.
No memory. No name. No hope.
I bolted awake, shaking horribly as I came out of the nightmare that had haunted me for the last week.
Turning to my right, Rin was still fast asleep, a faint snore coming from her every few seconds.
I was covered in sweat and my head was hurting, my mouth dry as I gently got out of the bed, going towards the front of our apartment.
I wish I had never seen Mikoto. The weeks after me regaining my lucidity were nightmarish. I had knowledge of a genocide, and no feasible way to stop it.
Obito was spying on the village, Danzo was probably monitoring everything as well, and the village itself was already starting to be more adversarial with the Uchiha police.
The last thing I wanted to do was get caught in the middle between law enforcement and antagonistic civilians. It tended to turn bloody.
Checking the time by looking at the clock on the wall, I scowled when I saw it was 6 in the morning.
I wasn't going to get any sleep, so I might as well do something somewhat productive. I grabbed a hold of a few knick-knack items off the kitchen table and began to do some of the chakra sticking exercises, swearing under my breath when I ignited the paper accidentally.
End Chapter:
Not much to say, so, thanks for reading.
Raging.