A/N: From this point onward, depression, self-harm and other sensitive issues might be shown, portrayed or discussed in this chapter and others to come. Reader discretion is advised for those who are sensitive to such matters.

CHAPTER FIFTY – TRACING THE LINES (YuKi)

The words still rang fresh from that day in Naoki's mind. The way Yuri had embraced him, had confessed what she dared while being in tears all throughout . . . it was a marvel that he even made it back home on his own without getting lost as his own worries started mounting. Yuri had seem torn between wanting to be with him and hiding her face after what had happened, but Naoki was thankful that she seemed to dwell on the former even more. He had not stopped trying to assure her of his help and companionship over and over, to make good on his promise that he would indeed help her overcome her problems of her anxiety and the answers she oft sought in the glinting blades of her knives.

But how?

Despite all that he had read about instances of self-harm, about what the people involved felt and what their reasons were, about the steps they had taken to try and curb the habit, Naoki felt like he was nowhere close to having any concrete help for Yuri. His own fear that she might have a relapse always lingered, preventing him from asking anything about her current situation lest she feel too pressured by his prodding. It was only when Yuri chose to open up about what she felt comfortable that Naoki could act, asking her about what other problems she was having and what he could do to help her. Yuri would tell him that everything was going as smoothly as can be, but he could not shake off the idea that she was understandably holding back.

For now, Naoki had to make do with the information he had, focusing on those tidbits and trying to see what solution he can form out of them. It was obvious that Yuri's self-harm came as an outlet for her anxiety, but whether or not that anxiety stemmed from a bad childhood experience or something else was another matter that he wanted to identify. Yuri had mentioned before how people had treated her as a pariah, a know-it-all who often talked before thinking, and it wasn't hard to guess that this contributed greatly to her introversion. But Naoki wanted to know if there was some form of pain beneath those experiences, an instance where Yuri was explicitly abused in a verbal, emotional or even physical manner. Perhaps Yuri also cut herself as some form of punishment whenever she feels that she had overstepped her boundaries in a conversation, and it made him wonder with dread whether his past conversations with her had caused Yuri to take up her knife and . . .

Naoki shook his head, closing the book in front of him and standing up from his desk. He had wanted to read in order to pass the time and hopefully distract himself even just a little bit from his worries. He had eaten what he could keep down earlier at dinner and doubled down on his efforts to complete his homework, but once he had nothing else to do it became hard to keep his thoughts at bay. Not even the potentially light tone of the upcoming festival seemed to be enough to ease his mood, especially since the work he did with Yuri at her house had been the catalyst to their current predicament.

But amidst all this were glimmers of respite, unwittingly provided by their friends. Kenta returning to school after his suspension provided a good breath of fresh air, with how dreary things seemed to have become in his absence. While he had been understandably hesitant still about reconnecting with everyone, he was slowly easing back into the fun-loving, wisecracking firebrand that everyone knew well. But Naoki knew that this was not the only welcome development that had happened thus far; Natsuki had surprised him, Yuri and Daisuke recently with her plans to bake for the festival, even bringing along some cupcakes for them to taste-test and help her decide for real. Naoki had been talking to Yuri then, doing his best to calm her nerves after she had almost shown up late for school, a result of the sleepless nights she had been enduring since their fateful encounter. Natsuki's arrival had almost been timely, as it distracted them from their problems while also giving them something more to look forward to next week at the festival. Yuri had even confessed to him later that day about how she missed having small discussions with Natsuki on the rooftop, and that she felt happy about how she had managed to keep connecting with her in spite of their obvious differences. On a happier day, Naoki would have relished the chance to see Natsuki and Yuri bond more in person, but he was nonetheless happy that their most recent exchange had given Yuri some measure of gladness. He only wished for brighter days for everyone ahead—not just for Yuri, but also for Natsuki, as the faint bruise near her eye made him remember Daisuke's confession about her home situation, tarnishing the innocence of their brief but delightful encounter.

Naoki exited his room and made his way downstairs. With his homework done, he had nothing else to do, and he hoped that a glass of water and some snacks can hopefully prepare his mind for another long evening. His cellphone had been totally quiet; apart from some occasional texts from Daisuke and Kenta, there were no lengthy conversations to be had, and Yuri was obviously out of the question. As he entered the kitchen and walked over to the cupboards for a snack, Naoki was seized by a desire to go out and visit her, to check on how she was doing and keep her company during what would probably be another sleepless night for her, though his thoughts were held in check as he imagined just how Yuri would react to another sudden visit from him.

With some relief, he saw that his mother had stacked up on a new bag of their favorite trail mix in their cupboard. He took it out, filled up a glass of water from the nearby sink, and sat at their dining table to mull things over. Reading would have been a good accompaniment to his solitude, but it would only remind him of Yuri all over again. Then again, it wasn't like he could escape from everything; going online to read again about self-harm and anxiety had become part of his nightly routine, and he often ended up cramming more about such articles than he would expect. His continuing efforts reminded him of a famous phrase about insanity—doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Then again, if such a phrase was to be followed, then Naoki had no problems being called insane.

Kenta officially rejoined them at lunchtime the next day, with Naoki and Daisuke supplying fanfare in the form of applause and claps on the back; Akihiro was spotted at another table, waving cheerily as he saw them. To the rest of the student body in the cafeteria, it was as if nothing had changed, but Naoki knew better as he and Kenta immediately settled down to talk, though their conversations soon had him feeling like it was simply another normal day at school.

"—think that the first Friday after the festival's a good time?" asked Kenta. "Monika and I talked about it, and she really wants to make it happen before their practice goes full-time."

"Yeah, maybe we can make it happen," said Daisuke through a mouthful of rice.

"I thought you had already eaten with Natsuki earlier?" asked Naoki amusedly as he watched him eat with them.

"That was speed-eating," Daisuke mumbled, swallowing. "Natsuki was needed for a small meeting with our festival group, so we had to eat quick. Thought I'd get a second helping here to last me for the rest of the day."

"Hey, c'mon, guys," Kenta interjected peevishly. "Are we gonna start drawing up the plans or what?"

"Oh, right, sorry about that," said Daisuke. "Go right ahead."

"Is it going to be at Monika's place again?" Naoki inquired, chewing on a piece of fish.

"I think she'd be fine with that, unless you guys know another place we can go to," Kenta replied. "Someplace everyone can enjoy themselves, but somewhere that isn't already overused."

"The mall?" Daisuke proffered jokingly.

"That's the definition of overused, ya dolt."

"The arcade?"

Kenta sighed. ". . . Are you serious right now?"

"I'm sorry, man," said Daisuke, laughing. "Just wanted to mess around while I'm thinking of a serious answer. It's just good to have you back, y'know?"

"Yeah, yeah," said Kenta in a sheepish tone. "Sheesh, it's like I left the planet or something. . ."

"Felt like that," said Daisuke. "Anyway, I think one of the best bets you can have for the get-together is to actually go out of town. I mean, we've got some nice places here and there, but they don't exactly offer anything fresh for us people who've been living here for years now. A walk in the park, a session at the arcade, circling the mall for the nth time, there's just nothing new to do.

"It's times like these when I've thought about going out of town," Daisuke continued. "Maybe we can take a bullet train real quick to Tokyo, get lost in a new city for once. We can eat out and then go exploring in the districts, and we'd never even run out of places to go to. I think everyone would love that."

"Our allowances won't," Kenta pointed out.

". . . Well, maybe. But if we all chip in, it won't be that bad, right?"

"Let's just set that aside for the future, I guess. Anyway, how about the park? I think a picnic sounds pretty cool. . ."

"Pot luck picnic?"

"Maybe, but I don't think we'll need to cook actual dishes. Just . . . bring your own snacks, I guess."

"Sounds good. Hey, Naoki? You okay, dude?"

Naoki shook his head, as if awakened from a trance. He looked up to see Kenta and Daisuke looking at him with mild curiosity. Only then did he realize that he had drifted off with his own thoughts for almost a minute now.

"You're being real quiet all of a sudden, man," said Daisuke. "I thought you left the table or something."

"I'm fine," said Naoki with a small smile. "Just . . . thinking about stuff, that's all."

"By 'stuff,' you obviously mean Yuri," said Kenta in an amused tone.

Naoki chuckled, his expression belying the worry in his chest briefly. Daisuke and Kenta laughed with him, oblivious about what he was actually feeling and what he was anxious about. For a moment, he was seized with a desire to come clean, to inform them about what exactly it was that made him preoccupied. After all, Daisuke had done it with Natsuki's home situation. Kenta had done it once he got wind of Monika possibly moving away. In their circle, everyone would always have each other's backs, and Naoki knew he was free to confess what his worries were.

It was the mental image of Yuri crying, pleading with him not to tell anyone, that held him back. "You have no idea," was all he managed to say.

The tightness in her chest persisted, the chills running down her back always lingering like a pall of sickness. At every interval, it was as if something horrible, something ominous would happen at any moment. Her body was growing heavier, her energy fluctuating at extremes more and more by the day, and yet Yuri knew she had to endure.

The world seemed terminally changed since that day, that day when her anxiety had gotten the better of her. Being safe or secure was always uncertain, with the fear of another relapse and another staggering revelation lurking around the corner. It was both the luckiest and most unfortunate coincidence that Naoki had been the one to discover the truth that day, given how he had been so open and sympathetic that it was nothing short of a miracle, but it was still a small consolation given the potentially grim future that Yuri was facing. No matter how nice Naoki was being, no matter how many times she smiled and felt comforted by his presence, she kept sensing a dark lining beneath it all: the fact that his opinion of her had changed forever. It was the biggest terror that she was dreading, the proverbial sword of Damocles ready to decapitate her just as she believed she had escaped it, and Yuri had to wonder if such a terror wasn't already taking shape around her. Desperately, she had looked for signs of change in Naoki's demeanor, though she did not know if she was trying to prove her fears right or otherwise. Nothing much showed itself, but that merely gave rise to other intrusive thoughts. What if Naoki was hiding his true opinions from her out of pity? What if he had been doing that all along? What if, in her attraction towards him, she had blinded herself to the reality that she was not truly meant for any form of companionship, let alone with someone as understanding and innocent as Naoki?

She embraced her pillow tighter, feeling tears trickle out of the corners of her eyes involuntarily. In the silence of her room, there was no one to see her cry over her scars, no one except the unseen pairs of eyes that judged her to her core every time she made a mistake. Every day, it felt as if those eyes came from nearly every person that she passed, leering at her as if waiting for her to stumble and commit another huge blunder. Only a scant few were different, including Naoki, her blissfully oblivious grandmother, and to her continuing wonder, Natsuki Fujisawa.

The thought of her gave Yuri a brief moment of distractive respite, and she clung to it hastily, trying hard to focus on it so that her malaise would be eased. Though there were other moments that she could focus on—such as her time earlier with Naoki at school—that one was more profound than usual. Cupcakes, she remembered. Natsuki baked some cupcakes. Out of nowhere, she had come to them during a moment of seriousness, offering them some cupcakes and unwittingly distracting Yuri and Naoki from the continuing heaviness they were experiencing. Yes, she's going to bake for the festival. And we're all going to be there to taste them and enjoy the festivities and be merry. Yes, that's it.

And earlier, Naoki had told her about the next get-together that had yet to take off following their exams, no doubt thinking that the prospect of such a jaunt would help her feel better. In spite of her mounting emotional turmoil, the thought did comfort Yuri a little. It would still be hard to keep her composure in front of other people in light of recent events, but having Naoki with her and being in the presence of people that she was familiar with at least on a cordial level helped her look forward to the get-together with a bit more positivity, and the school festival would even help her bond with everyone a bit more before that—if she chose to do so, that is.

Yuri let her thoughts flow, spurred on by the fact that she was grounding herself down and away from her anxiety the more she focused on them. In her attempts to listen to what Naoki was narrating to her earlier, she also remembered him sharing Daisuke's thoughts about going out of town for new sights and trips, possibly on their next outing. Though going out of town was an entirely foreign aspect to Yuri, she knew what Daisuke was getting at. Sitting close to the border between Kanto and Chubu, their city Eishima had always been a small version of the archetypal urbane Japanese municipality. It was a modern settlement, that much was true, more developed than most of the cities and towns outside the region thanks to its relative proximity to the capital, though still not as highly industrialized. As such, its venues for curious, fun-seeking travelers and tourists were adequate but far too few. If one wanted more leisure and variety, they need only look at the urbane, neon-lit thoroughfares of bustling Tokyo and Osaka, or the rural, culturally rich sites of calmer Kyoto and Nara. In those four cities alone, there was much variety to be had indeed, and even the average citizen can find many beautiful and dynamic things in the span of a short trip. Yuri hearkened back to Naoki's small mention of kumihimo and Yamanashi, of the thought that she could one day visit there with him, and she marveled at how she was able to remember what should have been a trivial memory in spite of her dilemma.

It always came back to the people who mattered, Yuri mused as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. The ones who made everything worth the while and helped her come out of her shell, even if she was so introverted that she could not even answer a phone call from an acquaintance without stuttering. Somehow, they were the ones who prevented her from drifting back into being a ghost in the sidelines threatening to dissipate in the bright light of day. It was still difficult to go about every day pretending that everything was fine, but with the friends she had made along the way, Yuri felt that she could keep finding the momentary cure for the pall that gripped her so tightly. It wasn't much, but compared to using a knife and remembering the look on Naoki's face when he discovered her scars, there was no question about it being the better option.

Feeling slightly better, Yuri sat up gingerly on her bed. Only now did she feel the pangs of hunger in her stomach. Eating could be done easily enough, but she feared eating enough to the point where her anxiety would cause her to vomit. Thankfully, her grandmother always cooked light and healthy fare that she could keep down more easily than the food at school or from convenience stores, and she could always drink some more oolong tea to help fill her stomach without the risk of throwing up.

She found her grandmother washing dishes in the kitchen, telling her that it was past seven in the evening. The two of them always ate at six-thirty, after which they would clean up and her grandmother would rest for a while before calling it a day. Yuri felt guilty watching her at the sink; she was often the one who washed the dishes for her, but her grandmother clearly saw fit not to disturb her for dinner.

She looked around as Yuri entered the kitchen. "Ah, Granddaughter, you're awake," she said. "I thought you had already tucked in for the night."

"I'm s-sorry, Grandmother. I just d-drifted off, that's all," Yuri replied timidly.

"No need to worry. Your okayu is in the oven. I didn't want to put it in the refrigerator just yet in case you came down to eat."

"Thank you, Grandmother. . ."

Soon, as she heated some water for her tea, Yuri began to calm down some more. Her grandmother was wiping her freshly washed dishes dry with a clean cloth, her age noticeably weighing down the movements of her hands and arms. As she watched her, Yuri wanted to stand up and take over for her, but her grandmother spoke up again not long after, forestalling her thoughts.

"You look bedraggled, Granddaughter," she told her. "Rough day at school?"

Rough days all around. "Y-You could say that, Grandmother," said Yuri.

"Maybe all this coldness in the air has something to do with it," her grandmother mused. "I hope it doesn't become too much when winter comes. Before you know it, the first snowflakes will come. And to think that autumn was only just starting a short while back! My, how fast does time fly, indeed."

Time did fly fast, Yuri mused, but it always slowed down to a crawl whenever problems arose. Still, it would not do to punctuate her grandmother's idle talk with such a somber premise. "Do you think there will be more snow this year, Grandmother?" she asked instead.

"With all this cold? It could be anyone's guess," her grandmother replied. "I remember how your grandfather would observe the birds coming in when he would go fishing in the creek in autumn. He could predict how snowy the coming winter would be depending on how many birds he'd see flying here to escape the snows north of Honshu. I suppose we should be thankful that our city doesn't see as much snow as up there."

Yuri smiled wistfully at the memory of her grandfather. She remembered how he would often catch fish at the creek for them to eat at dinner every day, and regale her with stories of how Eishima used to be back when he was still a young man. Though her parents were absent, he had made things easier to deal with, and her grandmother would reminisce at length during lazy afternoons about how much she missed his company.

By the time she returned to her room after a brief but comforting dinner, Yuri began wondering what to do before calling it a night. A quick glance at her cellphone yielded no new messages, and she mused that Naoki must be busy with something at the moment. Not wanting to wait for any message from him and risk thinking about something she would start worrying overly about, she went over to her desk and contemplated taking out her copy of The Portrait of Markov from her schoolbag. In light of recent events, she found it remarkable in a somber sort of way that Libitina's miserable experiences were something that she could relate to, and she wanted to keep on reading in order to find out how it will end for the dark heroine. Still, Yuri felt unable to face the idea of reading ahead knowing that Naoki was as invested in Markov as she was, even though he had assured her many times before that if she needed to read ahead in order to feel better, she was more than free to do so.

Caught in her thoughts, Yuri looked down at the bottommost drawer on her desk. It was somewhat an involuntary glance; brought by force of habit or a mere nudge from her psyche, she could not say. Still, she did not need clear thinking to know what sat in that particular drawer. As she stared, her heartbeat rose at the thought.

But not for long. Yuri shook her head rapidly, as if trying to drive away an irksome fly that was buzzing around her face. No, not anymore. Not this time. With an obvious effort to keep anything inside her from boiling over, she reached for her schoolbag and took out a random notebook, placing it on top of the desk with more force than she would normally do. She stared long and hard at it for a moment, trying to force her thoughts to focus.

Lines. I need lines.

She reached out towards the nearby pencil case, wondering momentarily when her fingers had started trembling. She took a pen at random, flipped her notebook open, and stared down at a blank page. Taking a few deep breaths to calm her nerves, she braced the pen gingerly with her fingers.

A prompt. Yes, that'd be a good way to start.

And yet for a moment, Yuri could not find anything in her thoughts that she could use to craft the first lines of whatever she was going to write. Everything seemed drowned out by her worries and the somberness of the past few days. But still, Yuri knew there were nuggets of positivity to be found if she could only focus. She decided to look at the most recent developments she could remember.

Grandfather. The festival. Natsuki and her cupcakes. Those could work. And of course, there was Naoki, who sat above the rest of them. Though her hands and thoughts still felt unsure, Yuri readied her pen with a small twinge of determination, knowing that she could at least find an opening in these thoughts that she could start expounding on.

At school the next day, emotions were slowly rising in anticipation for festival week come Monday. More and more decorations for various booths began popping up in and around certain classrooms, and more students could be seen utilizing some areas to work on their prospective projects—the open field's sidelines, on the stone benches beneath the trees, and even the rooftop. Though Yuri felt anxious about drawing attention from people she knew as she waited on the rooftop, the students were too busy focusing on their work to even notice her. She slipped past them and hastily settled down on her usual spot, beginning the wait for Naoki. In her hands, slightly crumpled from being held too tight by her trembling fingers, her new poem was ready.

But though she managed to turn up a page's worth from two hours' worth of writing and rewriting, Yuri felt that it was far from the standards she was used to delivering. Some of the lines did not seem to ring as well as she wanted them to, and the flow was all over the place. Encouraged by the feel of putting words on paper, she had started laying down a plan to create a leitmotif for what she would end up writing: a sense of security and respite, things that seemed elusive for her nowadays. Indeed, instead of choosing separately between her memories of her grandfather as well as Naoki, Natsuki and the forthcoming lightness of the school festival, she had decided to use all of them in individual poems that tied them all together, putting down the past, present and future in four four-line stanzas. The only problem was that she felt her expectations had been too high, and she wondered despairingly if what she had written was something Naoki would even understand.

"Standing in the water, feeling the breeze on your face

Like a beacon basking in the sunset as the fishes teem

Before going home to open arms and smiles, a safe place

Treasured memories indeed, their light a soothing gleam

Walking over the stone paths and grassy roads

Towards acquaintances waiting for joy and a bright day ahead

To see warmth in cold grey, to find respite amid a sea of dread

With a present like this, does it matter still what the future holds?

As colors change and shapes arise, though fleeting it may all be

There is always much to be had and seen, if one only dares look

Black and white become no more; instead the world shines free

'Tis a sight well worth the long wait it took

Trace the lines, some people say, and you will find your way home

But 'tis a tricky business, and getting lost is oft probable

But remember that no matter how deep or how distant you may roam

The lines, the memories, always keep them in your chronicle"

Five minutes into her wait, Yuri began feeling lugubriously resigned. I shouldn't show this to him. He won't like it. I should just start all over again and turn up something better tomorrow. Given that Naoki still wasn't in sight, it was only a matter of folding up the poem and stashing it away in her skirt's pocket, never to be seen or heard of again.

"Alone again, are we?"

Startled out of her thoughts, Yuri looked around and saw, to her surprise once again, Natsuki standing a few feet away and looking at her. Her vivid pink eyes looked curious even as her face mask gave her a very serious air. She was clutching a small bento box in her arms, and Yuri could not help but notice for the first time that the bruise near her eye was almost entirely gone.

"H-Hello there, Natsuki," Yuri stammered back, attempting to smile and coming up short at the corners of her lips. "Are you about to have lunch?"

Natsuki shook her head. "Just finished eating at the other corner of the roof. It was really noisy around here earlier, so I looked for a quieter spot. How about you? Have you eaten already?"

"Ah, y-yes, thank you for asking. Are you going downstairs already? Y-You could sit with me if you want. I'm just . . ."

Natsuki narrowed her eyes shrewdly. "Waiting for your boyfriend as usual?"

Yuri blushed. "Y-You could say that."

"And she finally admits it," Natsuki proclaimed with a chuckle. Yuri laughed nervously, anticipating a blunt joke coming, but Natsuki did not say anything else about Naoki. Instead, she went on. "Anyway, I was gonna go downstairs for a bit while Daisuke's still not here, but . . . what the heck."

At that, she walked over and sat down to Yuri's left, placing her bento box beside her. Yuri's mind raced, wondering what she could say to keep the conversation going. Natsuki, however, had her covered.

"All this work for the festival . . . I have to admit, it takes getting used to," she stated, staring around at the other students who were planning and working near them. "At least Daisuke's really doubling down on helping me. Kinda hard to back out when he's that enthusiastic about it. . ."

"Oh, is the baking going well?" Yuri inquired.

"We haven't actually started baking yet, but we did manage to buy the first batch of ingredients," Natsuki replied. "His mom's a big help, and some of our classmates chipped in a bit more than we expected."

"I see. That sounds nice."

"Y-Yeah, I guess."

When silence prevailed for a few seconds following their exchange, Natsuki let out a sigh. Yuri felt slightly jarred by it, feeling that she was doing little to keep Natsuki from being bored of her company. But again, before she could continue the conversation, Natsuki was one step ahead of her again.

"Looks like you're not reading your horror novel this time around," she observed.

"Y-Yes, and it appears you don't have your manga with you as well," said Yuri in return.

"Yeah, I forgot it downstairs." She paused for a moment, her eyes narrowing curiously. "What's that?"

"Ah!" Glancing down, Yuri realized she had forgotten about the paper she had been holding. "This? T-This is . . ." she stammered.

"It's . . . what?" asked Natsuki, raising her eyebrows at her sudden discomfiture.

Yuri swallowed, feeling as if her heart would jump free through her throat. Her current predicament brought back memories of that day when their English professor had asked her to narrate her poem out loud for her classmates, opening the door for her to lay bare her feelings for Naoki for the first time. In her hands, the paper began crumpling up more as she clutched it tighter. It was hard enough to show them to someone she was close with like Naoki, let alone with a casual acquaintance like Natsuki. Still, Yuri also knew it would be rude to keep the poem from her when she had already noticed it.

"It's a p-p-poem. . ." she managed to say in a weak voice.

Again, Natsuki looked surprised. "A new one, eh?"

"That's r-right," said Yuri, remembering when Natsuki had noticed her writing in her notebook during their stay at The Monocle back then. "I wrote it last night, and I . . . I wanted to show it to N-Naoki today. . ."

"Really? So it's a love poem?" said Natsuki.

"N-Not really," said Yuri, feeling even more flustered at the thought of writing another poem expressing her immense adoration and affection for Naoki. "Just an ordinary poem, t-that's all."

"Uh-huh, sure," Natsuki intoned amusedly. However, the knowing humor in her eyes faded somewhat as she kept staring at the paper with mild interest. Though she was still reluctant to keep talking about her work, Yuri sensed that somehow, someway, Natsuki was genuinely curious about what she had written. The thought made Yuri feel both wary and curious, as perhaps she was merely overthinking about things, but then again, Natsuki had also shown mild interest about what she liked before.

Yuri decided to take the risk. "D-Do you want to read it?"

Though only Natsuki's eyes were truly visible above her face mask, Yuri noticed her expression change considerably. "Read?" Natsuki repeated, as if she had misheard.

When Yuri nodded, Natsuki sat up straighter, her gaze returning to the paper in her hand. "To be honest, I'm starting to feel curious about your writing," she admitted. "It's not every day that I get to meet a writer—or at least someone who's willing to let me read their love poems," she added jokingly.

Yuri shrank back at her comment, feeling mortified. "That's . . . If you think of it that way, t-then . . ."

Noticing her embarrassment, Natsuki sat up straighter. "Sorry about that. I didn't mean to sound rude or anything. Just wanted to, y'know, lighten things up. . ."

"Ah, I see. . . That's alright." Yuri swallowed nervously, taking one more look at her poem.

"If you r-really want to read it, h-here," she muttered, holding it out almost reluctantly towards Natsuki, who now looked completely surprised.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes, I'm s-sure."

With that, Natsuki reached out to take the poem from her cold fingers. Yuri quickly looked away, not wanting to watch Natsuki read the poem and see a semblance of any negative reaction. It wasn't that she was expecting a commentary full of praise, but still, she did not want to hear just how scattered her words were.

At last, Natsuki spoke up. "Well, it's about what I expected from someone like you," she remarked in a would-be casual tone.

"W-What do you mean?" asked Yuri; the fact that Natsuki had begun her review with such a tentative statement made her feel nervous of the actual truth beneath it.

"It's . . . you," Natsuki stated. "I mean, you as in you being smart and well-spoken, you know. All these big words and stuff. . . It fits the kind of voice you have."

"Ah, I see. . ." Yuri regarded her for a moment. "A-Are you saying that like it's a bad thing . . .?" she went on nervously.

"Not really, but . . ." Natsuki's eyebrows furrowed. "Well, I'm not exactly a fan of big words in a poem."

Yuri's heart fell at her words. I knew it was horrible. "W-Why is that?"

"I just don't believe that people always need big words to express how they feel," Natsuki replied. "Not that your poem was bad or anything because of that. Your style is alright, I guess. Like I said, it fits you to a T."

Somehow, Natsuki's reassurance near the end of her remarks did little to soothe Yuri's fears. Still, she beat the thought down, trying to convince her mind that Natsuki was merely offering constructive criticism in her own blunt way, and not shutting down her writing for being too fanciful.

"I understand," she said, trying hard to engage Natsuki in a civil discussion without letting her anxiety or introversion get in the way. "When I write, I use my own voice and the words I know, and for me the deeper the terminologies used, the better it will be for the meaning conveyed.

"I see. . ." Natsuki shrugged. "Well, lemme just say this—if I'm gonna make a poem, I'd keep it simple but meaningful. Not a lot of deep vocabulary involved, but you can be sure that it won't have any less impact because of that. Basically, it'd be easy to read, but it'll also hit you hard."

As her words rang out, Yuri regarded Natsuki with fresh eyes. Somehow, it surprised her that she was starting to speak about writing in such a manner—slightly defensive, especially for someone who has admitted to never writing a poem in a casual manner the same way Yuri did. Ignoring the slight competitiveness in Natsuki's tone, though, Yuri could not help but sense that Natsuki was growing more and more engaged with the topic now that she was offering her opinions in such a direct but dynamic manner.

"Why don't you try writing a poem then, Natsuki?" she asked her cordially.

Natsuki looked startled. "What do you mean?"

"I've said before that writing a poem can be cathartic for people, and it can even be fulfilling at times. Perhaps there are certain themes or issues that you would like to put into words apart from writing them in a diary or something."

"Well, you do have a point, but . . ."

"O-Of course, I'm not forcing you to start writing or anything," Yuri hastily added. "I just w-wanted to invite you into doing something that you might find meaningful. I can tell that you're interested s-somewhat."

"Hey, I'm n-not that interested, okay?" declared Natsuki, her straightforward aura momentarily dispelled as she looked self-conscious. "I was just p-pretty curious about your poem, that's all."

"C-Curious enough to start talking about what your writing style would be?" Yuri jested, the words popping out of her mouth before she could think.

"I . . . Y-You . . ." Natsuki spluttered. "N-Now you're starting to sound like Daisuke!"

"You called?" rang a boy's familiar voice.

Their conversation momentarily interrupted, Yuri and Natsuki turned around to see Daisuke and Naoki approaching them. "Hello there, Yuri!" Daisuke greeted cheerfully.

"H-Hello, Daisuke," Yuri greeted back with a nervous smile, which grew wider as her gaze shifted to Naoki, who nodded at her with a grin.

Still evidently flustered by their exchange, Natsuki stood up, walked over to Daisuke, and to Yuri's slight shock, punched him in the arm. Daisuke staggered a little, alarmed and pained by the blow.

"Hey, hey, hey! What was that for?!" he cried out, rubbing his arm.

"For being a wise guy, dummy!" Natsuki shot back.

Naoki, who was watching the encounter unfold before him with a look of mixed surprise and amusement, glanced over inquisitively at Yuri, who only managed to giggle. During those moments, lost as she was in the dynamic flow of emotions and thoughts she had briefly experienced, her anxiety had died down, and Yuri saw that her thoughts in the poem were true; when it came to seeking respite from the ills of daily life, the people around her did matter.

A/N: And here comes Goopy with another oof. My apologies for not delivering this chapter sooner, guys. Thankfully, there aren't a lot of mishaps and stress this time around. I just got really busy with a lot of things - work, helping at home, and tutoring on the side. I'm hopeful that as I start writing chapter fifty-one, I'll be able to finish it sooner now that I've got a clearer head and a slightly better schedule.

Also, you will notice that certain places from Japan will start popping up, beginning with this chapter. I bought a travel book about Japan recently to help me with the setting for my story, with the towns and cities and prefectures and whatnot. I hope it'll flesh out the world in the story even more for you as you read.

Anyway, that's that. See you in the next chapter!