Being back in the place she had grown up was terrifying. At the same time, it was what needed to happen. Poetic justice, she supposed. The wind snapped around her, and, almost expecting her mother to come and snatch at her, she whipped around on her heel only to find nothing. Briefly, she wished her daughter were with her. She pushed that thought aside. Lynn was safe in the palace, with her grandfather, with Red. This was not something she wanted her daughter to see. Lynn had seen her father, of course, but not the spot where her mother had buried what remained of his heart. She tried not to think about that much either. The pain felt new, just about, and that day had been one of the worst in her life. She had barely slept that night, that night after her mother killed him. She had been terrified her mother would find out she was pregnant. It had been all she had left of Daniel, and he had been so happy at the thought of their having a child together. She had sworn then she would never let her mother take that away from her. She had managed that. Regina paused, her thoughts wandering back to Lynn.

I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from Snow. I'm sorry I couldn't do more to make sure you were able to have your father too. I'm sorry for all the times my mother scared you, and -

She closed her eyes. Lynn was safe. Reminding herself of that and that this would become the end of Snow were the only things that made waiting here bearable. There was so little she had left. There had been even less, then. She shivered against her will. Among other things, killing Leopold had been her way of becoming who she wanted to be. Powerful. In control of her life. It had no longer been enough to just be who she had always been. She had to take - no, steal - who she wanted to be. That had worked out. But she wasn't happy. She hadn't been happy in years. There were moments where she was, yes, but never consistently. Those moments were the best in her life. Most of the time, she felt alone. When she had lost Lynn, she realised, that feeling only worsened. It was almost too much to acknowledge, let alone try to reckon with. Loss. Bitterness. Sadness. Those had become her constant companions for years, now. She opened her eyes, took in what she was around. The memory of that last day before being taken away by Leopold hit her worse than before.

She had felt to be in a trance for long enough that she was barely conscious of how much time had passed since Daniel had died. With the weak magic she had, she managed to perfectly preserve his body. Her father had hidden him away so Cora couldn't do anything more. He had promised to bring him to the palace in time, to have a proper coffin and burial shroud. She hadn't been sure where she would leave him to rest, but it would be somewhere Leopold couldn't move him, couldn't do anything to him. That was all that mattered. Her father had been the only person in her life, apart from Daniel, who had ever cared about her, ever viewed her as her own person. She had shifted the silk bag in which the dust she had collected - all that remained of Daniel's heart - rested. Her other hand had dropped down to her belly. It terrified her. She was going to be a mother. Would her and Daniel's child love her? Or would they resent her? She had blinked back tears and reached the spot her father had dug a small hole and provided a small gravestone.

She had fallen to her knees.

She had barely felt herself delicately placing the bag into the hole.

She had started crying when she - just as delicately - covered it and filled the hole again.

She had fallen forward onto it, curling up, and, unable to stop it, sobbed, not caring how she looked, or if anyone noticed or found her. It didn't matter.

She had eventually found it in her to get up and place the gravestone down, perfectly over the buried silk bag. The remains of her fiance.

She had wondered then if she would ever find someone she loved like that again.

That thought had never left her.

The odd dreams came back to her.

That woman she saw with her in them pricked that in her.

Would she ever find that woman?

That world seemed to be calling for them.

Was it real?

She pushed that aside.

Real or not, it gave her hope.

Hope.

She hadn't felt that in a very long time.

"Hello, Regina."

She turned around, flinching when she saw Snow approaching her. She met her halfway. The cold started to bite at her again. It was painful. But it was not the most painful part of being here. Step mother and step daughter stared at each other for a few minutes. Snow took in everything about her step mother. It was almost impossible to believe this was the same woman she had first met seven years before. She had been just twelve years old, Regina then just barely twenty. They were both so different. No longer was she able to be who she was - the princess - and she looked worse for wear, she knew. Her hair was a mess. Her clothes were a bit dirty, and the fur keeping her warm was matted and almost in as much disarray as her hair. Regina looked so different, too. Harsher. Angrier. Thinner. She was in mostly black, with slight hints of purple. Her features were sharper, more defined. She was just as beautiful as she always had been, but it was clear there was a great deal beneath the surface. Snow sighed, then startling when she met Regina's eyes.

Though Lynn had the green eyes of her father, apart from that, her eyes were the same as her mother's.

It hurt to think about. What had she done to Lynn since she had taken her back? What had she done to Red when she found them? Her stomach sank just at the fleeting thought of it. She chewed at the inside of her cheek. Regina did not scare her. She did, however, surprise her. They had not spoken since she had confronted her about what happened to her father. Regina had been merciless then. She didn't seem quite so merciless now. Then again, was she much different? She had taken Charming - James - and what was she planning on doing with him? She threatened to kill him. She wouldn't do that, would she? Regina knew how painful that was from her own experience. Surely she wouldn't do the same to her? She had already killed enough people. No one else needed to suffer. No one else needed to die because of this. Snow met Regina's eyes again. There was something there she hadn't noticed before. Pain. Her stomach sank.

Why had she chosen this place?

Almost everything she had ever experienced here had been painful, and what hadn't been had been taken from her.

"Follow me," Regina finally said.

Snow hesitated, but nodded, the two of them walking so slowly it felt almost like a death march. She briefly paused. This was the place Lynn's father, Regina's fiance, had died. It was hard to remember. At first, she had thought he simply left. Regina had let her think that, hadn't she? She had only admitted Daniel died when she - cruelly - explained what she had done to Snow's father. She reached up, brushing away a few tears at the thought. She couldn't cry. Now, she needed to be stronger than she had ever been. If she weren't, more people would be hurt. Lynn might be hurt. She glanced at Regina while they continued to walk. Lynn was not with them. Why was that? It was so rare she let her out of her sight, and that seemed especially true after she snatched her and Red. Suddenly, she felt sick. Regina only kept Lynn away from things if she did not want her to know about them. What about this did she not want Lynn to ever know about? Was it an admission of weakness? Or was something far more sinister going to show itself? They seemed equally likely. Snow glanced down at her feet, but then, finally, looked back to Regina when they paused.

"Do you remember when I ran down your runaway horse?"

She turned towards her, fully, shocked.

"Snow?" Regina pressed, her eyes narrowing. "Do you remember when I saved your life?"

Snow stared at her in disbelief.

"Of course," She said softly, pausing and then letting out a gentle, nervous laugh when she met her step mother's eyes. "It all looks the same."

"Not quite," Regina took in a sharp breath, gesturing to the gravestone. "This," She said quietly. "Is new."

Snow felt faint. Her entire body began to shake, starting with her hands.

"Is that -" She breathed.

"A grave," Regina cut in, briefly raising a hand to silence her. "Daniel's grave."

All the colour left Snow's face.

"Daniel?" She whispered, "I thought -"

"He ran away? I know. That was what you thought up until recently, when I told you the truth," Regina made no attempt to hide the bitterness she felt. "I told you that he ran away to spare your feelings…" She trailed off, and then shook her head. "Out of kindness. But, as I said, he died because of you."

Snow swallowed hard. "I'm sorry -" She reached, in an attempt to comfort her step mother, to lightly touch Regina's shoulder. Her hand was smacked away.

"I'm sorry too," She said, pulling out a small bag from the pocket of her gown. She shifted the weight of it in her hands, briefly closing her eyes so as not to cry. "But nothing," Her voice wavered. "Can change what happened. What you did."

Snow shook, starting to feel a little dizzy.

"You promised to keep my secret," Regina snapped. "You promised…but you lied."

Silence.

The two women stared at each other, both shaky.

Much to Snow's surprise, after years of not seeing Regina show much of her emotions, the queen was blinking back tears.

"I was very young," Snow barely got out. "And your mother -"

"She ripped his heart out!" Regina's voice broke, both in anger and upset. "Because of you! Because you couldn't listen to me!"

Snow met her eyes, fully. "You took my father," She shook her head. "Haven't we both suffered enough?"

Regina's eyes narrowed. "No," She said, reaching into her bag.

Snow eyed her nervously. "What is that?"

"It's just a morsel," Regina replied, taking out the apple. "Did you know that apples stand for health and wisdom?"

Snow's eyes widened in horror.

"So why do I get the feeling that one might kill me?"

Regina raised an eyebrow. "It won't kill you," She replied. "No, what it will do is far worse."

Snow bit her lip, her eyes falling on the apple in her step mother's hand. It looked innocuous. They both knew it was far from such; she had even admitted it.

"Your body will be your tomb," Regina went on, sounding almost amused at the thought. "And you'll be in there with nothing but dreams formed of your own regrets."

Snow shivered, wrapping her arms around herself. "You're going to force me to eat it," She whimpered.

Regina scoffed. "Of course not."

Snow stared at her in disbelief.

"It wouldn't work anyway," Regina paused in consideration, eyeing her step daughter out of the corners of her eyes. "The choice is yours. It must be taken willingly."

Snow's eyes narrowed, "And why would I do that?"

Regina let out a short, dry laugh. "Because," She said, anger slipping into her voice. "If you refuse the apple, your prince? Your…Charming? Will be killed."

"No…" Snow's breath hitched in her throat.

Regina smirked. "As I said, the choice is yours."

Snow took a small step towards her step mother. "I take that apple, and he lives?" She pressed. "That's the deal you want to make?"

"With all my heart," Regina hissed.

Snow hesitated, taking one last look at the apple.

"Then congratulations," She said, taking it, her hands shaking. "You've won."

She took one bite, and the moment she swallowed, she fell to the ground. The spell had worked. Her mind was racing. She saw her mother. Her father. She saw herself not killing Regina when she had the chance, when they had run into each other though the queen had been disguised, having been trying to see what the people thought of her. She saw Lynn. She saw James, helpless at Regina's mercy. She saw Red, in pain, struggling to hold onto and protect Lynn. And, then, she saw Regina. Regina, still the queen, but if Daniel had lived. Him, her king. She had still killed Snow's father, but she was not so angry, not so bitter. Not so upset. Then, she saw another world, a world she did not recognise. Regina. A blonde woman. The two of them were curled up together, asleep. The woman's arms were draped protectively over the queen. Things did not look as they did in the world, the life she knew, yet it seemed to be real. Was this the other side? She feared she would never know. She realised, in horror, that she almost certainly would never know.

Then she saw James, and she knew this was a premonition. He struggled, and fell over just as she had, in wherever Regina was holding him.

She couldn't see it, but Regina was not smiling when she walked away.

Instead, the queen was brushing away tears.

Snow was right, she had won.

She did not, however, feel that she had one.

She still felt empty.

She still felt alone.

Replies To Reviews:

jasouatfan: Snow is so misguided at this point she's almost seeing backwards! Regina has done a lot wrong, and neither of them are completely in the right, but her understanding of Regina and Lynn's relationship is completely off! i'm not going to let on what's happening next BUT i have full chapters outlined (not fully written) through chapter forty seven, and that's when Emma comes in, so keep your eyes peeled!

barrattajennifer: Regina's first concern has always been herself and Lynn, and it's definitely a major separation between herself and Snow!

Sammii16: of course love! i hope this chapter didn't disappoint!