Shenanigans

Chünin exams. Stage two. Forest of death

It was the scream what made him panic and shook his laziness out of his foundations, Shikamaru ran, flew, inside the mist without a second thought, without a moment of pause to regain his thoughts. He sprinted towards the sound and prayed to whatever god existed to be able to reach his best friend in time. The white veil around him blinded his every move, he punched the air and waved his hands to free himself from its hold on him, but more and more mist was poured down him like water.

His chest suddenly felt small, way too small, because his heart was trying to break his rib cage on its insistent beat, but he still didn't stop, didn't let himself think -and an unthinking Shikamaru was not Shikamaru but he didn't care, because that was his best friend's voice, that was his best friend's scream, and everything Shikamaru's mind could force itself to do was to keep moving forward.

Faster, faster, faster, he begged his muscles to move at the speed of the light, in the back of his mind he thanked Asuma for the rocks on his back and the way he made them accustomed to the weight in order to move because now he could run and barely touch the ground on his haste. The mist wavered, shook, it turned almost transparent all around him like it wanted him to see something and Shikamaru choked on his panic because this was fucked up, and everything around him was quiet and so apparently calm that he felt he was losing his mind. Then he saw two shadows further on, one on the ground and the other-

No.

It couldn't be real. Something inhumanly high leaned towards the figure on the ground (Chöji, Chöji, CHÖJI) opening his mouth widely as to bite, a horrible sound of bone breaking reached his ears and made him stop in shock, he saw the thing's jaw reaching its hip. Shikamaru could smell even from the distance the putrid scent coming out of its mouth -corpses, it had to be- as it swung its long, bony arms towards Chöji. His best friend screamed again and that pushed Shikamaru to move once more. He ran again without a second thought nor a plan, desperation running through his blood, adrenaline and panic -sheer, painful, panic pulsing through his nerves and making him just do something for good measure without considering his options.

There was only one option and it was saving Chöji, everything else dissolved before it could become a proper thought.

Something flew past him with faster speed and a swooshing sound and hit the thing -whatever it was, on the arm. "G- Get away from him," Ino panted from somewhere behind him.

"Help!" Chöji begged, terrified, his voice sore from screaming and screaming and screaming again, his hands full of blood because he tried to defend himself from the attack and he couldn't use anything but his kunais and hands. He was shaking and gritting his teeth while screaming. Shikamaru just reached him and desperately looked at him because where was he hurt? Where was he hurt?! Where?!

The monster took a step back and ripped off whatever Ino threw from its arm and charged against them again with its mouth still open, its body impossibly long and sharp and bony. Shikamaru's brain couldn't understand what it was. "The fatty boy can't get up," the thing howled, ripping parts of its skin in desperation for something to dismember, and Shikamaru shouldn't know the reason behind its movements but he did, the thing was still running towards them, so Shikamaru reacted-

"Earth release: Pebble Barrage!" He screamed and pointedly swung his arm towards the thing. Small stones and pebbles lifted quickly from the ground and flew towards it, but the monster didn't dodge them, the attack wasn't meant to be very damaging but Shikamaru didn't know many jutsus to work with other than his Shadow Release, which was out of the question since he couldn't stop the thing and help Chöji at the same time. The thing halted, briefly, but recovered fast enough for Shikamaru to hold his breath.

One, two, three kunais nailed on the thing's neck, skull, and arm respectively, and the monster cried in pain and turned.

"Over here! Here!" Ino screamed at it with trembling vocal cords and a pale face. She threw a new kunai again to get her point across and shunshined away with a log when the thing charged against her.

"Quick! Chöji, we need to run, get up!" Shikamaru panted, trying to make his friend stand.

"I can't!" Chöji replied desperately, "my feet! There's something on my feet!"

"What? What?!" Shikamaru asked and quickly threw her hands to his friend's feet, looking for whatever was holding Chöji down, then touching, then looking again. "There's nothing here! There's nothing Chöj-"

"It's there, can't you see it?!" And Chöji was panicking, "It's right there!"

"The fatty boy can't get up," he heard again, his blood boiled with adrenaline.

"The stupid girl is not good enough," a new voice -so, so similar to the other one and yet so different, emerged from somewhere around them. "The stupid girl is not good enough," they heard again, and from the shadows a new, inhumanly tall, skinny, sharp thing emerged, ripping the skin from its skull.

"The stupid girl is not good enough"

"The fatty boy can't get up."

"The stupid girl is not good enough."

And Shikamaru saw Ino's legs wobbling at the exact same moment the monster was about to reach her.

Shikamaru grabbed Chöji's head with one of his hands and almost dug his nails into his scalp, terror was now moving every part of his being and he sank his teeth on his lower lip until he could taste his own blood. He was sweating, he was trembling, he was terrified. He begged, he prayed he was right and his brain hadn't betrayed him because otherwise Ino would die and then Chöji would die and he would just kill himself before sense could kick in because he was the reason they perished.

He channeled chakra to Chöji's head.

"The smart one is forgettable," a new voice said, and he yelled the KAI.

Much to his surprise, Kisame didn't seem as oblivious as what was happening around the world as he pretended to be. Truth be told, Itachi never doubted Kisame's intel, he just didn't know the exact full length of his resources, much more considering that he wasn't particularly using them for what he probably should. Part of him wanted to thank his partner for letting this side of him wander around his vanity and gossip needs because that would mean that he wasn't particularly seeking information that would undoubtedly help Pein's plan progression -even when he knew better than entertaining that hope-. But another part of him was eager to lay a punch on his scaly skin, since he seemed always eager to debrief Itachi of his latest discoveries, a grin from ear to ear and his head cocked to the side, much to his own dismay.

"I have GREAT news," Kisame's foot kicked the door open when entering the room Itachi claimed as his, Samehada nowhere to be seen. Itachi had tried to rest for a few hours after they broke into the house they were currently in on their way to Iwagakure, the owners taken down by a genjutsu that would let them unconscious enough hours for them to sleep and eat whatever they could find on their cupboards.

"Tch," Itachi didn't feel caritative enough as to give Kisame any other type of response to his eagerness, his hand covering his eyes as to not be disturbed by the light the other Akatsuki member let in from the corridor.

"Look alive, you will like this, I promise," Kisame's knee bumped against his leg as to grab his attention, but Itachi didn't move one bit to acknowledge him, he huffed as to let him know that, not now, I'm really not in the mood, but Kisame's knee bumped against his leg once more.

"I will cut it off," he warned, his tone barely neutral, sinking his head deeper in the pillow.

"Someone had a rough night," Kisame replied, Itachi still didn't look at him. Rough night was a little bit of an understatement, he barely slept at all. His head was agonizingly throbbing and he was still haunted by the prospect of blindness, submitting to darkness this early on his plan was a twisted joke. He refused. He will not. Thinking about it prevented him from resting properly, hence, the headache.

"Come on 'Tachi, I swear is a really, really good news, plus, we should be going soon, so you could -you know, get up." Kisame's voice took a darker tone, "unless of course, you want me to kill the folks downstairs, that would undoubtedly solve the 'leave before they wake' problem."

"Thought you didn't like killing civilians," he replied.

"Thought you didn't like killing if you didn't have to. A waste of time and chakra, you called it, killing them would make your genjutsu go to waste, don't it?" Kisame replied back. He complied and promptly sat, the mattress sounding as old as it felt on his back, he could feel Kisame's presence at the foot of the bed, (im)patiently waiting for Itachi's acknowledgment of the subject he had brought up, Itachi almost feels compelled to give in to his impulses of punching him. "Really good news," Kisame whispered, standing closer to Itachi.

"What?" He spat through his teeth.

"Our team made it to the next round!" Kisame clapped, like Itachi was supposed to know what he was talking about.

"What?" He asked again, confusion relaxing his tone.

"Our te- oh, right, repeating won't help." Kisame sat next to him in a quick motion, "because context, right?"

"Kisame," Itachi massaged his temples with the palm of his hands.

"Alright, alright, you're having one of those days," Kisame recoiled, his hands up defensively. "Amegakure sent 21 teams to the Chünin exams Konoha's hosting." He smiled, "it's my pleasure to announce that five of them made it to the next round."

Now, that didn't satisfy Itachi's curiosity at all, he was more pissed than curious, granted, but he couldn't help but wonder, "did you train a group?" When? would have been his next question since Kisame hadn't left his side -much to his endless annoyance, but his teammate answered him before he could voice his doubt.

"Nah, I just thought that since Kiri sent none and, well, you hate Konoha, we might as well cheer for Ame."

Itachi blinked at this, failing to see where the appeal of supporting a village they weren't part of or had no feelings for, was. "What?" And granted, he had asked that a lot since his partnership with the swordsman, but his capacity to surprise him was infinite.

Kisame smiled, "it was just a thought…" he dismissed, "a bird also told me that thirty-five teams from Konoha itself advanced to the next round as well, an impressive amount, one would think they made it easier for the locals."

Ah, there it is, the backbone. Itachi knew what Kisame's intentions were, it surprised him how slow he came to the realization, if he weren't so sleep deprived, he wouldn't have forgiven himself. "It's that so?"

"Oh, come on Itachi, you and me both know that no village is above those tactics."

"And let me guess, Sasuke's team is in one of them." He went straight to the point, straightening his back.

"Uh," Kisame shrugged, "I wouldn't know." He smiled, aware that Itachi could tell he was lying, "alright, I think we should get going." He jumped to his feet, his head almost crashing against the ceiling. "Uh, that was close, stupid humans with their stupid height-" he blabbed, walking away, and then he screamed.

Itachi cast a genjutsu that made him fall down the stairs.

There was silence and there was light, mist nowhere to be found, Shikamaru's right hand was pierced by the kunai in Ino's hand that was in reality aimed towards her own neck by her own, twisted and manipulated, volition. His chest tightly pressed against her back, his other hand on her forehead to help her release. He was panting, barely in control of his own body, trembling by the rests of adrenaline that kept pulsing through his muscles.

Ino twisted and fought against his hold, the kunai moving from right to left from her motions. He grunted in pain but didn't let go, he pressed her harder against him in an attempt to calm her down. "Ino stop!" He cried in pain, "it's over! It's over!" He tried to bring her frenetic mind to the present. She was a Yamanaka, she was in control of her mind and those of others, the single thought of being stripped of that control was probably crushing her. Shikamaru could practically see her trying to control the reigns of her body, to cleanse her mind from the invaders in such a frenetic way that her body practically convulsed against him. He could, perhaps, sympathize with her struggle,

If it weren't for the fucking knife embedded in his hand.

"Ino- FUCK, CONTROL YOURSELF." He yelled at her, but she kept fighting him, she kept fighting something inside of her, and Shikamaru could do nothing but wait until her spasms quieted down long enough for him to gently set her down in the ground. She didn't look at him, she let him guide her to the floor and brought her hands to her head, crouching down. Shikamaru left her there and turned, his eyes meet his injured hand for the first time and he paused to look, minutes and minutes seemed to pass but he didn't turn his eyes away from the gash and the blood, the crimson color looked almost black on his skin. His hand looked paler, he felt it heavier with the weight of the kunai still inside him, he felt himself weakening. He laughed.

And laughed, and laughed.

Hope we are not embarrassing you, Asuma-sensei, he thought bitterly, pulling the kunai out of him in one clumsy motion that shook his legs with the force of the pain, he reached for his backpack, tossing the kunai to the ground, and hastily bandaged his hand, tightening the fabric as much as he could. "We need to keep moving," he grunted when he saw Ino approaching, pale and disheveled. "We need to find water, our canteens won't be enough."

Ino didn't argue, she probably didn't have the force to do so, "what about the other team?" She asked and Shikamaru paused.

"No," he thought out loud, "this wasn't made by another team, it was too tricky, I still have the scroll on my backpack, it wasn't cast by another team."

Ino pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes, sending a chill down his spine, it occurred to him that someone in the planning department was at serious risk of retaliation on her part, but Shikamaru couldn't force himself to care. He was tired, all of them were, and how long did they spent fighting their own minds? He looked around him, the kunais Ino threw while 'fighting' the monster were scattered across the floor, a part of the ground was lifted where he had made his Jutsu. They weren't even that far away from their door either.

Shenanigans. This place was specifically built for them -Shikamaru's injured hand trembled, and he stopped it with his other hand- which meant that probably every door had something specially made for those who crossed it. Team 7 and Team Gai probably encountered something that challenged their fighting abilities, since most of their members relied mostly on their sheer force of combat, team 8 probably their tracker competence or something of the sort. But they did leave an open for them to crack the code, they left information -or more accurately they left out information (like the non-existent branch that was keeping Chöji from moving or how he knew exactly what the monster was doing and why he was doing it for), for them to investigate and realize how to solve the issue, how to win against their trap.

What a twisted, awful mind they had.

Which meant that either they had to investigate each team that was enrolled in the Chünin exams or every village had the same patron for task-division; a capture and interrogation team (information gathering, like them), a tracker team, and a frontline combat team.

(This wasn't important to know, this didn't matter, but his hand hurt so much he just needed something to think about besides how much in pain he was.)

Was this over? Was this just the twisted idea the planning division had of a welcome present or this would keep happening further down the route? Should they be concerned still about this kind of trap alongside the possibility of running with another team? What the hell were they supposed to do? Shikamaru stood. "We need to keep moving. We need to find water," he said again, he needed to be sure this was over, and moving seemed the only way he could keep focus. He never thought the day will come when he would rather walk than lay down and do nothing, but here it was, a sunny, warm fucking day.

Chöji was still where Shikamaru had left him, looking at nothing, mumbling without moving an inch, his hands and forearms bleeding from where he had cut himself during the genjutsu attack. A bruise on his face that was probably caused by his own fist. Shikamaru walked towards him and quickly shut down the part of his brain that tried to think -too deep, too much- in what each monster meant for each of them, how they had designed them? How did they know what to say in order to bite their defenses and crept their way into their insecurities to make them hurt themselves instead of one another? (the smart one is forgettable)

He slowly crouched next to his friend, trying to find the right words. "Chöji," he whispered his name as not to startle him, and Chöji looked at him in shock.

"I…" Chöji started, his lower lip trembling in a way that made Shikamaru's heart sink at the pit of his stomach, "I couldn't move, I…"

"I know," Shikamaru tried to reassure him but Chöji wasn't listening.

"It was so close," he blinked, tears fell down his cheeks with each blink, "it was so close and it kept- it kept hurting me -I -I- I left, I left you and-"

"It's not your fault, nothing is your fault." He wanted to shake Chöji to make him understand but he looked so lost, he looked so frightened.

Chöji blinked, "It was so close- It was so close- It hurt, I hurt me- I- It-"

Ino gently pushed Shikamaru out of the way and kneeled softly in the grass in front of Chöji, eye-leveled. He blinked and some tears fell but other than that did nothing. Ino for her part grabbed her backpack and took a pair of bandages, and slowly and deliberately used them to carefully bandage Chöji's arms up to his elbows. Chöji, still, did nothing. He was frozen in place like he was afraid to move, looking at Ino like she would hate him if he made any movement.

"You're okay," she whispered, finishing bandaging him. "We've got you."

Chöji nodded slowly, then he nodded again, then again and grabbed at Ino for dear life. He cried in silence on her shoulder and she allowed it, gently patting his back, her only attempt to comfort. They were gënin but they had never experienced being so close to dying up until now and Chöji alone couldn't get up but maybe with the help of both of them, he would be able.

Ino looked at Shikamaru and he whispered a thank you in return.

Shikamaru was still on watch when she spoke, his shift would not end for a couple of hours, a couple of hours that she should use to rest. He demanded to be the first one on watch because he needed to be alone, he needed to do something besides worry. The cold was piercing through his skin forcing him to stay awake and also purred him to sleep, his injured hand burned despite the lack of warmth in his surroundings.

"Are you awake?" Ino asked him and he saw her looking at him, she and Chöji were forced to sleep together in search of warmth. Starting a fire was completely out of question since other teams will be able to see the smoke from various locations, so they were left only with the clothes they brought to the forest to use in order to get warm.

As it was, the three of them were more than underprepared. Ino still used her purple top and skirt, expecting the typical Konoha weather that was not able to drop more than one or two degrees in this time of the year, but if there was something that the first genjutsu had taught them, was that whoever planned this was a sadistic individual (or group, who knew), and of course the temperature somehow magically dropped in a way that made his teeth shiver. "Go to sleep," he replied simply, choosing to ignore the question completely because he was supposed to be on watch. Of course, he was awake.

To his surprise Ino didn't immediately reply, he heard nothing after his command, and for a moment he entertained the idea that she had actually obeyed him. "Why didn't you stop the thing with your shadow?" It was a demand for an explanation of an action he performed under pressure, the nerve of this girl, Shikamaru was sure that if he could see her, he will be looking at a scowl on her face.

"What?" He replied with a question of his own, perplexed.

"Why didn't you stop the thing with your shadow?" She asked again, repeating word by word without indulging him in the context he was actually looking for or a deeper introspection on why would she ask something so idiotic. The only difference was that this time her tone was more unforgiven.

"It was a genjutsu." He replied tilting his head to the side and raising an eyebrow, forgetting for a moment that she could not see the motion, he charged his voice with a deeper sarcastic tone for future interactions.

"You know what I mean. You could have stopped it and I could have helped Chöji and-"

"It was a genjutsu, a thing that I saved you from -so, you're welcome there." He didn't hide the disdain in his voice, his injured hand throbbing with pain and burning, spasming occasionally. The injure she provoked still too fresh in his body and his mind, it didn't matter for him who planned the whole trap, she was the one carrying the weapon that ended up embedded in his hand.

"Genjutsu or not -you can't think under pressure." It was obvious by her voice that she was gritting her teeth, he could imagine her moving until she was sitting, her voice reached his ears almost warmingly.

"I figured the genjutsu before you opened your throat, so this thing you're doing?" He moved a finger between the two of them more for his sake than hers, since she couldn't see him doing it, "trying to take me down so you feel better about yourself and your lack of skills? It's not going to work."

She took in air, it was obvious by the sound and his knowledge of her mannerisms, something about being under a genjutsu had tightened a dangerous thing in within her, it was a stupid thing to be scared of -she was a ninja for Kamisama's sake, she should know better than to freak out for a basic mental attack, but then again, she had been particularly annoying since the beginning of the test, so maybe he was reading too much into it. "But if it hadn't been..."

"But IT was! Why should we entertain your stupid hypothetical scenario of me not functioning when we both know for a fact that you didn't?!"

"The scenario is half-hypothetical! You did a mistake!"

"I saved your life!"

"If you had controlled that thing with your shadow, maybe we could have moved before the genjut-"

"Oh please! Stop! Why are you pushing this?"

"Listen," she breathed again with a pause, as if collecting her thoughts, Shikamaru grabbed a handful of grass from the ground and tossed it to his other side, then cut one by one to distract himself from the pain and his discomfort. "You are sometimes so trapped into the complicated things, that you miss the simple ones."

"And by simple things you mean you, right?" He spat, tired, furious, wanting to go back to the solitude he desperately looked for when he asked to be the first one on watch and that Ino had taken from him with her presence and conversation.

It sounded as if she wanted to rip his head off, "I. am. not. a thing." She roared low enough not to weaken Chöji, despite both of them being almost screaming a moment ago, "you know? It's almost comical how your biggest feat is your brain, while mine is to learn how to turn it into a mush."

"Are you threatening me?" He asked her, rarely glancing at her shadow, it was night time and he was at a disadvantage to control her with his Jutsu, but she couldn't see him, so he could work with that in his favor.

"I..." she didn't sound shy, Shikamaru was sure that the only reason why she paused was because she was fully trying to understand the consequences of her attacking him, of a fight between them, what would it mean for their clans and alliance, to Konoha, to their parents. So many negative outcomes sure outweighed the pleasure of beating him senseless, but again, Ino Yamanaka was such an unpredictable creature. "I hate you so much."

And that was both unexpected and not surprising at all, the sentiment was mutual -or almost, Shikamaru couldn't fully hate her because little was the time he dedicated to think her, but the full admission was a strong move on her part, it should have made nothing on him, but it felt suddenly wrong, this was wrong, she was wrong and he... he was not. Couldn't be. "I'm not fighting alone," she added after a moment, noticing his silence -and when she spoke he noticed it too, he hadn't replied to her statement, he had kept silent, thinking of her and her hatred. "I'm not snapping at a wall because I'm mental. Don't run away from your responsibility."

He covered his face with his hands -his right still hurt, so much, but he didn't know what else to do, his eyes burned with each blink because he was fighting so hard to stay awake, "what do you want for me Ino? What do you want?" He whispered, defeated, suddenly so done with everything, hating so much Asuma, Shikaku, and everyone responsible for putting him in this position.

And then, "Chöji ran away from us," she said the five words that had haunted him all day -except that Chöji ran away from him and he couldn't grasp the idea that his best friend had left him behind without looking back-, and will stick with him for the rest of his life, the weight that the knowledge settled within his chest was just too much to bear so he chose to focus on other issues. Ino forced him to face it, Ino forced him to take accountability. You had to be a fool not to notice the somber shadow that darkened Chöji's usually cheerful face right after both Ino and he screamed at each other before entering the forest, no one was as oblivious as to not put two and two together and track Chöji's reckless behavior at both his teammates. At him.

"We can't keep doing this," he breathed out, exhausted.

"I know." She replied.

"I can't lose Chöji," he admitted because he was really tired and Ino was listening and the cold did a number on his brain and numbed the part that always thought that she's not worth it. "I can't. Not him. Not because of me."

"I know," her voice reached him again. "I know," she repeated for good measure.

He swallowed again, bringing his arms around himself in search of warmth. "Go to sleep Ino, I'll wake you up when it's your shift."

"Alright," she whispered again. Shikamaru looked up at the sky.

There were no stars.

A/N: Please let me know your thoughts! It's such an important thing for me to know your opinions and a great way to show your support!

Stay safe!