Sorry for the wait! I hope you enjoy this chapter. The next chapter will be Boys II Mensa.
...
"In conclusion, some products we use everyday cause algae to grow in lakes…" a brunette said while pouring liquid into a giant beaker.
"…cutting off oxygen and disrupting the ecosystem," the blonde next to her continued while putting a fake fish in the beaker.
"So, what we've learned is that we must choose biodegradable products to help protect our environment." The blonde pulled out fake fish bones.
"Excellent report! Inspired visuals. Next team!" Feeny announced.
Cory and Shawn high-five before heading to the front of the classroom and pulling down a map. "How air pollution affects our everyday life."
"Excellent topic."
Riley and Maya shared a look. Their dads were goofballs as kids. This report was bound to be a mess.
The two boys stretched their metal pointers. Shawn slapped his stick on a random point on the map, only for it to be moved by Feeny. "Denver. Elevation: five thousand feet."
Cory did the same as Shawn. "Philadelphia. Lying low in the Delaware basin, 250 feet above sea level."
Riley stifled a laugh at her dad and Uncle Shawn. It was nice to be smarter than one of her parents for once. "This is gonna be a fun few hours."
"Not for me," Cory responded while replaying every stupid thing he's ever done all at once.
"Well researched."
Shawn once again pointed to a random spot on the map. This time George didn't correct him. "Denver. Clean crisp mountain air."
"Philadelphia. Polluted Industrial smog."
"Mile High Stadium: home of the Colorado Rockies."
"Veterans Stadium: home of the Philadelphia Phillies."
"I was never a straight-A student or anything, but, wow, this is bad," Katy commented, sneaking a playful glance at her husband.
Shawn didn't bat an eye at her. Instead, he stared straight at the screen. "Oh, it gets worse." The tips of his ears were tinged slightly pink.
"But at least it was dramatic," Cory said to make their report look a little better.
"Oh, here we go…" Feeny groaned.
Shawn walked to the teacher's desk. "The Rockies, a bogus expansion team, mind you, are averaging four more runs per game than anyone in the league… because of their clean air."
"Our theory is, if Philadelphia would clean up its smoggy air, the ball would slice through the atmosphere with a greater velocity," Cory explained, causing Mr. Feeny to shake his head.
Feeny was staring at the screen, bringing his hand up to shield his eyes, shaking his head along with the Feeny on the screen.
"Therefore the Phillies would score more runs."
"And win every home game. The end." The two boys closed their pointers and stared at Feeny. "So, how'd you like our report?"
"Stinks," George declared.
"Stinks!" Cory shouted to Shawn. "How'd you like my half?"
"Equally as terrible," Riley guessed humorously.
"Relax, Mr. Matthews, I blame myself."
"You do? Cool!" Cory and Shawn high-fived.
"I let you choose your own partner. An astounding lapse of judgment for someone of my experience. I am going to let you try again, but this time I'll choose the teams. Mr. Hunter, you'll work with Mr. Minkus."
Shawn and Stuart slapped their foreheads. "Oh, no."
Farkle chuckled lightly at the reaction. "I guess you two really weren't friends."
"Well, I did care about your father to some degree," Shawn told him, earning an eye roll from Stuart. "Although most of the time I just thought he was weird, so I didn't talk to him."
"Sounds like you and me," Maya joked to Farkle.
"And Mr. Matthews…"
"Yeah, I'll hook up with Mr. Sullivan."
"Another friend that disappeared?" Riley assumed.
"Yep," Cory replied. Shawn's wide eyes met his before they both returned their gazes to the screen.
"No, no. That's worse. You'll work with Miss Lawrence."
"Topanga?"
Riley and Maya sat in their chairs intrigued and somewhat excited. They were eager to see the now successful mother and lawyer as a young, awkward student.
She turned around at the mention of her name. "Give me your hand."
Cory looked at her in confusion. "Why?"
"I want to see if our energies converge." Cory placed his hand on hers.
"Oh, wow," Riley blurted out. Her mom had mentioned being a "hippie" before, but she never quite knew what her mother meant.
"Ooooooooh!" Shawn said mockingly while wiggling his fingers.
Maya snickered at her dad's reaction. She noticed Topanga looking at her. "Oh, sorry, Mrs. Matthews...Cool hair by the way!"
The woman shrugged. "It's fine. That's what we're here for. To laugh at us when we were younger."
Topanga turned away from Cory. "He's vibrationally acceptable."
Topanga squirmed in her seat at just how odd she had been, reminding herself to just laugh it off.
"Thanks," he told her as he walked to George's desk. "Uh, Mr. Feeny? May I approach the bench?"
"Objection, Mr. Matthews?"
"Can you be swayed on this?"
"I'm Gibraltar."
"Come on, Mr. Feeny. Topanga's, like, totally strange."
Cory glanced over at his wife and grabbed her hand. She couldn't even feign offense. They both just smiled at the screen, the memories of their early days, though not always pleasant, were theirs.
"Strange is in the eye of the beholder, Mr. Matthews. I, for example, have a young neighbor who sings along with his little sister's Barney records."
Cory stared at him, disturbed at the revelation. "You hear that?"
An amused Shawn turned to Cory. The curly-haired man held up his other hand. "Don't you dare say a word."
Lucas grinned at his teacher. "Weird. I would've taken you as more of a Wiggles fan."
The scene changed to the cafeteria. The girls from earlier were chatting in front of Cory.
The brunette asked, "Why would I want to invite him to my party?"
"What's wrong with him?" the blonde responded.
"He's gross. He's a total Brillo head." The blonde laughed before realizing that Cory was standing behind them. The girls awkwardly walked off.
Cory touched his hair curiously as he sat down at the lunch table. He observed himself in a spoon. "What do you think of my hair?"
The audience (even Cory) laughed at his reaction to the comment. Topanga ruffled Cory's hair, chiming "Oh well, at least you still have your hair!" Cory smiled another goofy grin.
Shawn turned to Cory. "Guys don't ask guys that question."
"Well…Would this qualify as a Brillo head?"
"Nah…" Shawn touched Cory's hair with both of his hands, "more like a Nerf head."
"You knew this and you didn't tell me?!"
"You got curly hair. Big deal. Can we move on now?"
"Sure, it's easy for you to talk. You got hair. I'm a Chia pet."
"From one curly-headed guy to another, I love your hair," Zay told his teacher.
"Thank you, Zay." Cory replied, pointedly glancing over at Shawn who refused to take his eyes from the screen and had pure glee in his eyes.
Topanga walked up to the table with a clipboard in her hands. "Cory. I got Jedidiah to drive me to your house after school."
"Who's Jedidiah?" Cory questioned.
"My father."
"Wait, you call your father 'Jedidiah'?"
"That's his name. What do you call your father?"
"Did you not realize that was weird, Topanga?" Riley questioned her mom, putting an emphasis on her name.
"Honestly, no." She chuckled.
"Well, like a lot of normal people, I refer to him as 'Dad'."
"Then how do you tell him apart from all the other dads?"
"How do you tell your dad apart from all the Jedidiahs?" Maya countered.
Shawn smirked before adding, "The only person I can think of with a name like Jedidiah is in the Bible."
Cory looked down and ignored the question. "Look, Topanga, is there any way we can do this assignment on the phone? Or by telepathy?"
"It concerns our environment. I think it deserves more direct attention."
"Okay, okay. I'll see you at my house after school."
"Before I leave, I'd like you to sign a petition to save Mrs. Rosemead's job."
Shawn asked, "Who's Mrs. Rosemead?"
"Our librarian. They're forcing her to retire. It's blatant ageism."
Shawn nodded. "Maybe because she's blatantly old."
"Blatantly old, Shawn?" Feeny repeated.
"Kids...am I right?" Shawn said with a grin.
Cory spoke up, "Look, can we talk about this later? We're real, real busy here."
"Fine. I'll respect your space." She walked off.
Shawn watched her leave, then chuckled. "Wow. Feeny must really hate your guts."
"Could be worse. At least he didn't give me Minkus."
"Hey. Minkus doesn't like me, he doesn't trust me, and he doesn't respect me. So he's doing the whole assignment by himself. In my book, Stuart Minkus is a god."
Stuart smirked at the comment. "I can't believe I never knew this."
"If there's one thing I like, it's somebody else doing my work for me."
"Then why is he sitting at the weirdo table?" Cory asked while staring at the kids. Topanga, Minkus, and three other kids were sitting at the table.
"It's like the cast of 'The Addams Family.' Don't they care what they look like?" Shawn questioned.
"Who cares what they look like? What am I gonna do about my hair?"
"Hey, if you're that stressed out, I'll ask my sister what she uses to straighten her hair."
"What?!" Maya shouted.
Shawn nervously turned to his left to look at his daughter. He hadn't mentioned Stacey to her. In fact, besides Katy, he never really explained what happened to her to any of his friends or family for that matter. Jack knew a little about her but could never bring himself to ask about her and Cory only knew some parts. "She's Jack and I's half-sister. Her name was Stacey. She's four years older than Jack, and I never mention her because she ran off with her boyfriend like six months after this. We haven't heard from her since." Shawn finished. Katy snaked her arm around Shawn.
"What was she like?" The question surprisingly came from Jack. He hadn't known her at all, only knew vaguely of a girl named Stacey because his mother mentioned her a few times to his stepfather.
"To eleven-year-old me, your typical annoying older teenage sister," Shawn told him with a small smile despite feelings of sadness lingering in his heart.
"I wish I could have met her," Jack said, a frown present on his lips. Maya silently nodded in agreement.
The screen now showed the Matthews' living room. Morgan went to where her mom was sitting. "Mommy? If my dolly is cold, can I put her in the toaster oven?"
"No, honey, that would be a mistake."
"Mommy?"
"What?"
"I made a mistake."
"Looks like somebody's getting a new doll," commented Josh.
Amy paced to the kitchen to retrieve the doll. "Cory, didn't you smell that?"
Cory, who was sitting next to Topanga, replied, "I just thought we were having plastic for dinner."
Amy pulled out the doll that was now fully flat. Morgan looked at the doll. "I don't care what she looks like, Debbie's my doll and I love her."
Amy smiled at the familiar sight. It felt good to revisit old memories.
"Well, sweetheart, we'll get you another doll."
"Okay." The little girl carelessly tossed to doll onto the counter.
Morgan shook her head and laughed lightly. "Guess I wasn't too attached to her."
Cory noticed his mother leaving the room. "See you later, Amy."
She turned with her hands on her hips. "Amy?"
"Now I finally have the context to that," Mrs. Matthews said to her son.
"Or if you prefer Mom." After she left Cory whispered to Topanga, "I told you!"
"I have some ideas on our presentation."
"So do I! Here's what we do. We hit Feeny hard, we hit him fast. The ozone layer, it's got a hole. Wear a hat! We're in, we're out."
"I kind of had a whole different approach to the report. Less conventional, more performance art." Topanga walked placed her boombox on the kitchen counter.
"No, please, let's stick to conventional. Conventional is good because no one laughs at conventional."
"Read this poem out loud." She handed the paper to him.
Topanga braced herself for the reaction to the "Donut in the Sky" poem to begin. The dance was sure to get a few laughs — even from Topanga herself.
"A poem? Please, not a poem." he grimaced. The music started and he began reading.
"Sun…The only. The one." During the performance, Topanga pointed to the ceiling, while Cory stared at her, bewildered.
Riley kept looking back and forth at the screen and her mother. It was crazy to think that this odd, hippie-like girl is the younger version of her mom. Despite seeing several photos of her, Riley was still shocked at the eccentric child who reminded her a bit of herself if she was being honest.
"Donut in the sky. Space. Big gaping place. Without. Within. Our skin. Doughnut in the sky." She continued doing her odd dance, even drawing on her face with red lipstick.
"Well, it's very...creative," Angela said to make a somewhat positive comment.
"If creative means bad," Eric replied. He smiled at his sister-in-law. "No offense, though, Tangerine."
"Freon. Fluorocarbon. Humpback whale. So pale. Exhaust. Is all lost? Donut in the sky." After finishing her dance, she bowed.
"Yeah, we could do that in front of the class… but before we could, will you just please take a huge baseball bat and hit me over the head?"
"You didn't think it had meaning?"
"Yeah, it means we'll be laughed out of school."
"Why do you care so much what other people think? When people laugh at you, they're depleting their own karmic reservoir."
"You're gonna be one of those girls who doesn't shave her legs, aren't you?"
Riley was taken by surprise by the comment. She chuckled promptly and waited for her mother's response.
"I haven't decided yet."
Shawn glanced at the woman a few seats away from him with a boyish smile. "Have you decided now?"
"Yes," Topanga confirms.
"Do you actually try to be weird?"
"I don't think I'm weird. I think I'm unique. Jedidiah and Chloe say that every time you're not true to yourself, the earth weeps."
"Isn't Grandma's name Rhiannon?" Riley questioned.
"Some people have two middle names. Her full name is Rhiannon Chloe Miriam Curtis. She changed which name she went by based on how she 'spiritually' felt at the moment," Topanga explained.
"Do they say that in their native Martian?"
"The earth is crying for you, Cory!"
"I'd rather have the earth crying than my friends laughing. People make fun of you, Topanga."
"So?"
"I couldn't take it. I just want to blend in."
"Well, you're sure good at it. You look like all the other plain-wrapped kids at school," she grabbed his baseball cap from the table, "except for your red hat."
He snatched it from her. "Hey! I got that on cap night. I had to wait an hour in line."
"Well, If it's important to you…then it's beautiful."
"Got the stuff," Shawn announced after entering the kitchen. He stared at the girl's face in shock. "Use a mirror, babe."
Jack let out a laugh at his younger brother's comment. It was strange to see Shawn even younger than he was when the two met years ago. He was excited (and a little scared) to see what Shawn's childhood was really like.
Topanga glanced at Cory. "What stuff?"
"Let me ask you something. What do you think of my hair? You think it looks good?"
"It's beautiful. Like a desert tumbleweed."
"Okay, thank you for those thoughts. Look, Topanga, you wanna do this performance thing, you do for it. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Are we all done for today?"
"Yeah, Shawn and I have another project we're working on now."
"Really? What is it?"
Shawn stood in front of Topanga. He responded in a soft voice, "Well, you know how those dolphins get caught in the tuna nets?"
"Yeah."
"It's got nothing to do with that," he slammed the door in her face. The boys high-fived and ran upstairs.
"Oh, yeah. I remember that," Topanga told her friend. She crossed her arms and gave a playful glare.
In a new scene they walked from the bathroom to the bedroom. Cory had the cream in his hair already and a towel on his shoulders. "Should this stuff be burning?!"
"Why, is it burning?" Shawn asked.
"No, I'm just trying to make conversation because we never really get to talk," Cory sarcastically responded.
Topanga smiled. She gazed at her husband. "Oh, those were the days. Back when you and Shawn weren't attached at the hip," she teased.
"How bad is it burning?"
"Call your sister. Ask her if my ears should feel like throbbing jalapeños."
Shawn held the phone up to his ear. "Hi, Stacey? It's me. Listen, Cory wants to know if that stuff you sent over should be burning. Uh-huh…Really?" he asked nonchalantly as Cory frantically waved his hands in pain.
"Hurting! Hurting now!"
"Stacey wants to know how long it's been burning."
"Forty, forty-five minutes."
"Forty-five minutes."
"Shawn, I'm gonna rip my head off!"
The audience, minus Cory, guffawed at the statement. He shook his head, unamused. "Oh, so my pain is funny?"
"Yeah," Eric answered.
"Stacey says you should've washed it out forty-five minutes ago."
"Ahh!" Cory yelled while running to the bathroom.
"Stacey says you shouldn't have left it in so long! Stacey says why didn't you two idiots read the label! Oh, thanks, Stace."
"I think I like this Stacey," Katy remarked.
Cory screamed in horror. Shawn turned his head toward the bathroom with his mouth wide open at the sudden yelling. The scene then showed a picture of Philadelphia, the earth, and the Milky Way, all with Cory screaming in the background.
Shawn furrowed his eyebrows. "Is this what you pictured while screaming or something?"
"Well, that, and dragons breathing fire onto my head," Cory replied with a hint of bitterness. "Thanks for that by the way."
Cory walked out of the bathroom, showing his ridiculous hair. Eric and Amy burst through the door to see what was wrong. They screamed in response to seeing Cory's straightened hair.
Riley covered her mouth with her hand to mask her laughing. Maya, on the other hand, chuckled freely.
"I had nothing to do with this," Shawn defended. He ran out of the room, brushing past Eric.
"Absolutely nothing," repeated Jonathan Turner.
Amy walked over to him, stroking his hair. "Cory, what did you do to your beautiful hair?"
"It wasn't beautiful, it looked like Velcro," Cory retorted.
Eric touched Cory's hair. "Nothing's gonna stick to that now, man." Cory slapped his hand away.
"This is your fault, you got the good hair."
"Yeah, I did, didn't I?" Eric brushed his hair with his hands proudly.
"Way to make your brother feel better," Rachel said.
Amy attempted to run a comb through Cory's hair. "Okay, we can fix this. Just…not with a comb."
"It doesn't really matter, Mom. His hair's gonna fall out," Eric stated.
She stopped trying to brush Cory's hair, leaving the pink comb stuck. "Eric, stop it."
"What? I'm just saying kid at school tried the same thing," he clapped his hands, "bald as a cue ball! She looks terrible."
Alan grinned at his son, knowing that he would say the same thing later on.
Morgan entered the bedroom, "I don't like my new dolly. She's not wearing a pretty dress."
Amy bent down to her. "Well, honey, she's a businesswoman. I mean this dolly has gone to college, has a good job, and doesn't need Ken to support her."
Cory spoke, "Who cares? I got a head problem, here!"
Morgan turned to him. "Hey, it's Punky Brewster!"
She walked off as Alan entered. He tilted his head as he observed the boy's hair. "That's a hat, right?"
"Yeah, try and take it off," Eric suggested.
Alan wiggled the comb on his head. "Cory, what did you do?"
"I tried to straighten my hair, okay?"
"With what, shellac?"
"Dad, you think a little shampoo might…"
Eric cut him off, "No. You see, the whole principle behind shampoo is that it actually has to touch your hair. It's completely ineffective if there's a polyurethane force field surrounding your head."
"I just hope your hair doesn't fall out," Alan said with his hands on his hips.
"Alan!" Amy protested.
"Okay, a guy at work, Mike, put this kind of stuff in his hair," he clapped his hands, "bald as a cue ball!"
"I guess you just got lucky, huh? Or are you wearing a toupee now?" Maya teased.
Cory got up from his bed. "Okay, listen up, family. Because, I admit, I didn't know what I was doing when I put this stuff on my head. And I admit I didn't know what it was going to do to me. But here's the thing I do know: I am, under no circumstances, going to school tomorrow. Is that clear? No school for Cory. School, Cory? No!"
The next scene showed Cory sitting at his desk angrily with a red hat on his head.
Rilley tittered. "So much for not going to school."
"Alright, next up for oral reports, Miss Lawrence and Mr. Matthews. Let's go, Mr. Matthews. Remove your cap and deliver your report," George Feeny instructed.
"Uh, I can't remove my cap because our report is on the ozone layer and the cap, uh, is part of our UV-protection angle."
"No caps in my class."
"Mr. Feeny, if there was one shred of humanity in you, you'll let me keep this on."
"Too many years of sixth graders have bled me of my humanity. Take off your cap."
Cory took off his hat sadly. The whole class except for Topanga roared with laughter. He looked at her. "Go ahead, laugh."
"Your hair looks different. Why would I laugh?" she responded.
"You were laughing on the inside," insisted Maya.
The scene was now in the cafeteria. Cory was looking for a place to sit.
"Over here…duck head," Shawn called out, making him and the other boy at the table burst out laughing.
"Sorry," Shawn apologized.
Cory waved him off. "We were eleven."
Cory stood in front of them, unamused. Topanga spoke up, "Cory! There's a seat for you here."
He took one long look at his chuckling friends who were motioning for him to sit with them before sitting down at the "weird" table.
Stuart stretched out his hand to Cory while holding chopsticks. "Tofu?"
The scene changed again. The kids were still eating their lunch. A girl walked up to them. "I only got one signature on our petition."
"It's so sad. How come no one cares about Mrs. Rosemead?" asked Topanga.
Cory answered, "Because she's, like, old."
"In eastern culture, old people are valued for their knowledge," a boy said.
"Darren, I've been meaning to ask you something since the fourth grade. Every day you come to school with a cape. What's the deal with the cape?"
"What cape?"
"I always thought it was mean and insensitive to call them weirdos, but that kid really was a weirdo, wasn't he?" Topanga laughed.
The girl with the petition spoke again, "Look, could someone else take this for a while? I'm getting tired of having lima beans and spit wads shot at me all day."
Stuart held out his hand. "I'll take it. I'm used to having objects hurled at my head."
"No one's gonna sign your petition," Cory told the group.
"Why not?" Topanga questioned.
"Because you're weird. However, I say that respectfully since I am now one of you. But I know how to get them to sign."
"Why should we listen to you? You didn't even know who Mrs. Rosemead was."
"I don't have to know Mrs. Rosemead. All I have to know is the people who you want to sign the petition."
"We know who they are. They're people like that, right over there."
"They might as well be a million miles away. You don't know a thing about them. What to they like to do after school? What do they like to watch on TV?"
"'Crossfire'?"
"'MacNeil-Lehrer Report.'"
"I enjoy anything with Angela Lansbury."
"Alright…I'll assume those are all actual shows. They're not watching those. They're out there watching 'Beavis and Butthead.'"
"Who?" all the kids asked in unison.
Riley and Maya stared at the screen in confusion. "Who?"
"A popular cartoon show in the 90s," Cory explained. He glanced at Shawn. "Kids these days…"
"Exactly my point. You want to sell your idea, you need to know your buyer. You gotta organize, you gotta strategize. And most of all, you need people who aren't…you."
"Are you proposing to help us?" Stuart questioned.
"Yeah, I guess I am."
Topanga looked at him. "Why?"
"Because life is strange, and now so am I."
Cory was now in his room with pink curlers in his hair. Eric walked in and stopped when he noticed his little brother. They stared at each other before Cory finally spoke, "Okay. What I'm doing is…I'm just trying to get my hair back to normal."
Eric nodded. "Sure…"
"If you say anything I'll find some way to hurt you when I'm older."
"Still haven't," Cory muttered.
"Not a word, man. I mean, it's cool, you know. Don't worry about it," Eric said as he slowly inched towards his desk. He pulled out an old-looking camera and snapped a picture of Cory when he wasn't looking.
"Hey!"
"I own you now." Eric held up the polaroid as Cory looked at him, horrified.
"Please tell me you still have that picture," Maya said.
"Yep. I keep it safe...just in case."
As the screen changed, the five "weird" kids were standing in front of the lockers. "How much longer are we gonna wait for him?"
"Just a couple more minutes," Topanga told the girl.
"He's not gonna show."
"We were stupid to believe him."
"I feel cheap," Stuart said.
Cory walked down the stairs with his head down. His hair now looked like a poofy afro. "I know you people are way too smart and mature to find something as degrading as this funny." They all laughed in response. "Look, the bell's gonna rings any second. Are we gonna help out Mrs. Rosemead or not?"
"I see the curlers didn't work as well as you hoped," Lucas noted as he attemped to hide a smile.
The kids nodded at each other excitedly. Minkus confirmed, "Let's rock 'n' roll!"
"Remember, hold your ground. It's Friday afternoon, and we are the only roadblock to freedom. Things could get ugly," Cory said as they all handcuffed each other, blocking anyone from moving past them.
The bell rang and a large group of kids stood in front of them. "What are you geeks doing? We're gonna miss the bus!"
"Hey, look! It's Don King!" one kid joked.
"Okay, look. Here's the deal. The school board is forcing Mrs. Rosemead to retire," Cory explained.
"Who cares? It's the weekend!"
"Come on, you guys! The woman's been here for forty years and they're just putting her out to pasture. Just sign our petition and we'll move."
"Move…or die." The crowd inched forward in a threatening manner.
"Okay, you can kill us. But think about this: Mrs. Rosemead's been here for, like, a billion years. She couldn't care less what we do. Hey, Larry, tell them how you got out of study hall last week."
"I told her I was training for the Olympic decathlon."
"And she believed you, right?"
"She bought me a discus."
"See? She'll go for anything! Now you know what's gonna happen? They're gonna hire someone young to replace her. And this one's gonna have something to prove. And, my good friends, study hall as we know it's gonna be over…forever."
"Where's the stupid petition?" Larry asked.
"Cafeteria."
"I'm signing," Larry shrugged. All the kids followed him to the cafeteria.
"Wow," Stuart said.
"You did great, Cory," Topanga told him. The kids got uncuffed and left, leaving Cory and Topanga together.
"It was kinda cool staring down an angry mob. I never knew I had it in me."
"Sometimes the reluctant warrior is the bravest warrior."
Cory lost his goofy grin and stared at the girl in worry. "You're not gonna, like, kiss me now, are you?"
Riley gripped Maya's arm and moved back and forth in her seat, shaking the blonde in the process. "It's happening!"
"Would it be your first kiss?"
"Hey, don't come near me!" He moved his wrist back and forth vigorously in an attempt to break the handcuffs.
"I don't think you're too happy about this," Shawn observed.
"'Think'?"
"Because it would be interesting if all your life you remembered that your first kiss happened when you thought you looked weird, wouldn't it?"
"No! It wouldn't be interesting! Get away!"
"Because then you'd know. It's not what you look like on the outside that matters. It's what kind of person you are."
"You shouldn't kiss somebody you're not married to."
"Hmm…Yeah…I would have to feel I really knew the person. And that I liked him."
"Good."
"Good." She pushed him against the lockers and then leaned in to kiss him. She pulled away, showing his shocked and disgusted face. "It was my first one, too."
"You know what this reminds me of?" Maya smiled.
"Nooo!" Riley shouted to stop her best friend.
"When Riley and Farkle kissed. She had the same look on her face."
"When who kissed?!" Cory stared at the boy and girl.
"It was just on the chin!" Riley sat in her chair, mortified. "Maya, back me up here."
Maya faced Cory's direction. She had a smug grin on her face. "Your daughter is the future Mrs. Minkus."
"Hey!" Isadora objected to a bewildered Riley.
The next day, Cory walked up to the two girls from earlier. "Y'know, I want to tell you something. Brillo Head wouldn't have come to your party, anyway."
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about the hair does not make the man. And I speak from personal experience. You shouldn't talk about people like that."
"Don't flatter yourself, Cory. We weren't even talking about you."
"You called me Brillo head."
"We were talking about my sister's friend Dwayne."
"We never talk about you, Cory. We're not that bored." They walked off.
"Ouch," Isadora said loudly.
Cory walked over to Topanga and chatted with her shortly. After he was done he sat down next to Shawn, then glanced back at the girl. She put on his red hat before they both looked away.
"Aww! This was great," Riley said. "I can't wait to see you two get together!"