xXx
Moving out. I was really moving out. What an overwhelmingly terribly brilliant reality that was turning out to be. I sighed heavily. It was honestly, really exciting but at the same time, my stomach was churning. At the moment, I was lounging on Axel's couch. My stuff was in garbage bags in the hall. I couldn't help but be a bit restless, in anticipation of the backlash that I knew was coming my way.
We'd gone to my place at the first opportunity to get my stuff after class on Friday. I had completely been dreading it, but it wasn't something I could have avoided for forever and at least Axel had been willing to go with me. I was currently thanking every and any higher power I could think of that there had been no confrontations about it. I was internally cringing about my phone though. Axel had stolen it to make sure that I wasn't getting sucked into any negativity. I was sure that I'd be drowning in "concerned" messages as soon as I got it back. I could already see it.
I was seriously considering just being heartless and changing my number. Running away sounded nice. Very nice. I silently pitied the poor bastard that would inherit that mess. Or... on second thought, I supposed that blocking their numbers would suffice. That seemed like the easier option. Either way, as long as they couldn't bother me. I sighed again, turning the keys Reno had given me over and over in my fingers, waiting for all of this to feel real. I'd put Axel's on the same chain. I was still in complete shock about all of this. I couldn't imagine coming home to quiet. Or not dealing with the hassle of a cat peeing on my clothes. Or having my boyfriend over without being harassed. I sighed again, this time more dramatically. Just thinking the word boyfriend had me blushing. It wasn't fair how cool and collected he could be, while I was the opposite.
It took some effort, but I refocused my thoughts. I really needed to process this. Ok, so, moving. As far as my friends and I had known, I was just making threats. Boy were they going to be in for a surprise when they realized I was actually gone. I couldn't believe it, myself. Even if I hadn't had the guts to do it, I'm pretty sure Axel hadn't been willing to let me go back. Even if I'd told him to go to hell he wouldn't have stood down this time. I couldn't get the savagely protective look that had been on his face out of my head and I was absolutely blushing about it. Ugh I was blushing again...but... no one had felt that way about me before. It made me feel so drawn to him.
Finally I grasped them, holding them to my chest. My heart was pounding so fast. I couldn't believe how much lighter I felt. My eyes slid shut. He'd left me to give me some much needed time by myself. I couldn't believe this. We weren't even serious and he was willing to do so much for me. He'd even given me a key to his place. Did that mean I needed to give him one to mine? Were there rules against that? I didn't even know besides nope, that wasn't something I was ready to reciprocate. Although, I didn't think that would hurt Axel's feelings. My heart spiked every time I thought of him. I was gonna be in so much trouble if he kept being this amazing. My brooding was interrupted by a single word.
"Baby..." That word from his gorgeous lips did so many weird things to me. I felt like my body was on fire. At the same time, I completely froze when fingers trailed my skin. His lips pressed to mine. I shuddered. He was eating one of his sea-salt flavored candies and he tasted so good. His tongue slid into my mouth and I whimpered helplessly. I was panting when our eyes met. His fiery hair was pulled back in a low ponytail and he was smiling gently. I couldn't even be mad about him invading my space. "How are you feeling?" he purred softly. I melted into a puddle of goo. What an outrageously perfect man.
"Better," I admitted. He smiled at me endearingly. My heart was having a seizure and I was seriously starting to wonder what was wrong with me.
"I've gotta go in soon, if you want a ride. Otherwise you can come by whenever you want." I nodded slowly, absolutely aware of his fingers sliding along my skin, touching and caressing all the right places and massaging gently. It felt so good. It took me a moment to remember what he was talking about. That's right… the band was playing. I smiled a bit, realizing he was in his work clothes.
"Sorry, I forgot. To be honest, it feels like its been years since we talked about going and I don't have my phone to remind me" His lips quirked up.
"Understandable," he purred back. "You've had some big changes." I nodded, closing my eyes with a gentle exhale.
"Is it alright if I meet you there?"
"Of course, baby," he answered. I felt so relieved. He was so… amazing. "Your phone's in the key bowl… be careful if you're walking, okay?" I nodded a bit. His hand gently caressed my face and I blinked up at him in surprise. "I understand if you don't want to come tonight. Besides its not a big deal, I already have you all to myself for the next few days," he teased gently. We got carried away in another kiss. With a soft grin, he pulled back. "I'm gonna head out 'kay?" I nodded, watching him go. I debated for a while. I was actually feeling super relaxed. It was odd but nice, not to feel constant pressure and scrutiny. I exhaled softly. That was my favorite thing about him. He was so easy-going.
I lounged about for a while before rummaging through my stuff for some clean clothes, to make myself presentable. He'd wanted me to meet his friends. Given that he seemed to have a decent intuition about what I would enjoy, I'd actually been looking forward to it. Reno was turning out to be pretty great too. If I was a little more ambitious I'd volunteer for the restoration committee or something to thank him. I liked my free time from Axel though. I chuckled under my breath, catching myself. I had the opportunity to have a whole night away from him, yet here I was, going to him, huh? Oh but I wanted him. I hoped he wouldn't think I was clingy. I chucked, catching myself again. Oh what the hell was wrong with me? Why did I care if he thought that or not? I sighed, hoping I wasn't about to regret this.
I pulled the front door shut and made my way to the coffee shop after locking his house behind me. The sky was clear and there were so many stars. It was so peaceful and quiet. A stark contrast to the music coming from the Perky Parrot and The After Life, across the street. Still, with a shrug, I let myself in and was pleasantly surprised. The posters told me the band's featured singer was the Melodious Nocturne. He had blond hair and aquamarine eyes. They were bright and beautiful. His hairstyle was interesting at best, a mowhawk and a mullet combination. I hummed. I could somehow see someone like that being Axel's friend. As soon as the thought crossed my mind, my gaze landed on them. They were together, Axel was chatting animatedly and super at ease. The blond beside him was watching him affectionately with a small smile. I tensed, jealousy sweeping through me. I froze. Wow that was not like me. Still, I felt really awkward. Before I could even think about escaping, Axel looked up, as if drawn to me. He smiled and it completely took my breath away. He said something and then they were both approaching me before I was ready for it. His eyes were sparkling and I was frozen on the spot trying to keep myself together.
"Hey, I'm glad you made it," he told me, taking my hand and drawing me further into the shop, toward the stage and the blond. Our fingers were twined together automatically. My head was spinning and my heart was racing. I almost didn't hear what he said next. "This is my good friend Demyx. He's the lead singer tonight." I nodded absently.
"Hey, nice to meet you Roxas!" The blond replied enthusiastically. I flinched a bit. It reminded me of Sora. Axel pulled me closer and I shivered as he spoke in my ear. He was so warm and smelled so nice. I blushed, sea salt lingered about him. It reminded me of our last kiss. I licked my lips without thinking about it as he asked,
"Can I get you something to drink? Want a soda or something." I nodded quickly. My face was so red, my ears were burning." It took me a moment to realize he'd disappeared from my side. I exhaled, just taking a moment to breathe. I hadn't realized I'd been holding my breath until then.
"So you're staying with Axel for a few days huh?" I jumped a bit. I'd completely forgotten about Demyx. He was watching me with a small delighted smile and tilted his chin, motioning for me to follow him to an empty seat.
"Uh yeah," I answered absently.
"That's good, I'm glad he can help you out." I nodded slowly and ventured,
"You two seem close." Nodding a bit Demyx told me,
"Yeah. We've been friends for a long time." Said red-head appeared to bring me a sprite. When I asked what I owed him, he just gave me an arch smile and shook his head gently. Then he was back to work. I caught Demyx giving us a goofy smile. His next question made me choke on my drink. "So would you ever be with him?"
"Would you?" I huffed.
Demyx smiled impishly at the walls I'd immediately constructed and I don't know how he did it, but he bypassed them. Maybe it was his brutal honesty and how easy-going he was. He was a lot like Axel that way. "Axel's a really good guy. If I wasn't taken, I'd be with him for sure," he said, winking at me. I felt myself automatically scoff at him and he laughed. "What? You asked, and it's true," he said, waggling his eyebrows. "He's super sexy and hardworking too. Full package, right there. But," Demyx told me, smiling gently, "I'm afraid it just wouldn't work out between us, even if we had the chance." Feeling triumphant, I asked,
"Oh? Why's that?" Snorting in amusement, Demyx shrugged.
"You really can't see how much he adores you, huh?" I blushed, feeling my cheeks and my ears burning. Again. I did know. He looked at me like that all the time. My lips curved up. It was easy with Demyx too and I was actually glad that I'd come.
"Actually I can. He's mine." Aquamarine eyes widened.
"No, what?!" He gasped, grinning hugely. I pressed my finger against my lips. So… he was even keeping it a secret from his good friends. All for me. That was actually really exciting.
"I have super overbearing friends and family members. So shhh," I teased. Chuckling he told me,
"Yeah I heard about that." He smiled a bit, glancing behind me. I looked up to see Axel smiling down at me gently. My face automatically reddened. How much of that had he heard? "Hey, I'd better get back on stage, intermission's over." Axel nodded, taking Demyx's place to sit beside me.
I went absolutely quiet, unable to think of anything to say as we listened to the band perform. He was casually close, his eyes shut as he enjoyed the music. My stomach was doing summer-salts. When the song ended I asked, "Taking a break?" His lips curved up and he glanced at me.
"My boss is delighted to see you here." My face darkened. It was so embarrassing.
"Yeah?" He hummed in affirmation.
"He told me to give you some attention." I swallowed harshly.
"Um why?" His glittering green eyes screamed mischief. He slid closer, covering my hand with his.
"He likes that I'm happy and he likes seeing you flustered." I couldn't look away from those bright green eyes.
"H-how do you know that." Axel bent closer to murmur in my ear.
"He told me." My face was so hot I felt a little lightheaded. Mercifully he changed the subject. "Are you having a good time?" But he still teased me as his lips brushed my ear. I nodded. He backed off with a smile. "Good."
"Demyx seems nice," I murmured vaguely.
"I'm glad to hear you say that." I blinked at him.
"You are?" He nodded.
"I want you to like my friends," he answered. "Demy's actually an alumni of HBU. He pursued music and met his husband there." My mind blanked.
"H-husband?" Axel nodded and told me,
"He's super smart. Zexion is part of Shinra's research team and has contributed to some of the textbooks that Dr. Crescent teaches about Mako." He laughed at the look on my face and knew that I was cringing about that horrifyingly boring subject.
"But Demyx seems so fun and interesting!" I blurted, clicking my jaw shut as Axel laughed in amusement.
"Sometimes opposites attract. Kindof… like Sora and Riku." I crinkled my nose at him. Did he really have to bring them up? He watched me with gentle concern. "How are things going with Sora?" I frowned.
"To be honest, I haven't checked my phone." He smiled a bit.
"That's gotta be hard. I'm proud of you." I nodded in agreement. It was. I was glad to have support right now, to be honest. "Thanks for letting me help you." I blinked up at him.
"Thanks for wanting to help," I answered. "I can't believe how perfect you are…" I muttered. He squeezed my hand and I looked up to see him giving me an endearing smile. I hadn't expected him to actually hear me. How embarrassing.
"I'm glad you feel that way," he told me. He was so, so close and murmuring in my ear. "I'll make sure not to disappoint you," he purred. I shivered. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close. I felt my face steadily reddening.
"Um is it okay to be so open where you work?" His fingers trailed up and down my arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. I swallowed, feeling his breath on my ear.
"Are you worried about me?" he teased softly. I turned my head, finding myself lost in green eyes. My heart was beating so fast and I lost myself for a long moment.
"Reno doesn't seem to mind but…"
"Nobody would mind if I kissed you right now," he told me, making my eyes widen a bit. His lips quirked up. "Except you." He lent a bit closer and my breath caught. I had to stop myself from leaning forward. "...maybe," he teased. I scoffed at him. His smile only widened. "Reno doesn't mind. At all. I told you, he's delighted about this."
"Why is that?" The beautiful red-head shrugged whimsically, his smile fading.
"I haven't been lucky with love either, Roxas," he told me. I blinked, a bit taken aback. Really? His eyes sparkled, and I knew he was about to lighten the mood. "You look just like Cloud. That's Reno's boyfriend. So he really likes seeing you flustered. Cloud's always so serious." When did I start getting so used to reading him? I hummed softly, feeling a little awkward that when Reno saw me he probably thought of his boyfriend. Wait…
"What's so different about me?" I asked seriously. His smile was absolutely full of satisfaction.
"We click… and the connection I feel with you is absolutely electric," he told me. "I feel like I've been waiting for you, my whole life. I feel like you were made for me." My heart… was throbbing, it was beating so fast. Like every pulse was beating for him. Not that I was about to admit that. It was too soon to be so serious.
"How can you be so sure?" He gave me a knowing look, like he knew all of my secrets, no matter how much I tried to hide. He indulged me, his gaze becoming light and playful, but his tone was serious.
"I can feel it, here," he told me, touching his chest, right where his heart was.
"Me too," I breathed without thinking. I realized what I'd said when his lips pressed to mine. I couldn't believe how terrifyingly good it felt. I sat there frozen for a moment and he broke the kiss.
"Sorry, I'll be good," he told me. I belatedly realized that he thought I didn't want it. I grasped his arm.
"No Axel, I-" He smiled at me affectionately.
"I know, baby," he told me. I'm sure he could see me freaking out and trying to sort myself out. "I'll go relieve Reno for a bit, 'kay?" he murmured. He was so good at reading me.
"No," I gasped, "I…" He stared into my eyes, absolutely melting.
"Okay," he told me, taking my hand and leading me somewhere. As soon was we were alone, his mouth was on mine and I was kissing back in a feverish kiss. I couldn't control myself around him, I just wanted him. So much. I was breathing harshly as he attacked my neck and lifted me up to set me on a counter top. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him close. His eyes fluttered and he moaned my name, right in my ear as our arousals pressed together. It was the sexiest thing I'd ever heard in my life. "Don't plan on sleeping tonight," he promised, his left hand sliding into my pants and squeezing my ass. It felt so good.
"That's fine, I'll just sleep in your bed all day," I told him. His nose brushed against mine and he was staring deeply into my eyes for a long moment before taking my lips in a tender kiss. He sighed.
"Reno might kill me for this," He laughed breathlessly. I blinked at him before blushing deeply, realizing what were doing while he was working. He chuckled softly.
"If we um… don't get caught, will it be fine?" His smile became impish.
"I never thought I'd hear you say that," he told me.
"Um well," my face was overheating. "I don't want to leave you like that." He rolled his hips into mine and my whole body trembled. I was still shuddering as he pressed his fingers into me. I whimpered and he groaned. Our lips met again, our tongues battling. I was completely lost by the time he was thrusting into me. I whimpered and moaned, so turned on that we were doing something so inappropriate. His hand found my arousal, moving in time to the thrusting. I moaned, pulling him close when he came. He groaned in satisfaction and worked his way down, taking me into his mouth to return the favor. It had all happened so fast. When I came back to my senses, he was fixing my clothes and murmuring softly,
"See you in a little bit."
I watched him go and then covered my face with my hands. It was radiating heat. Oh my God. What was I thinking. I should have just let him go back to work and controlled myself until his shift was over. The part that I couldn't get over was… I felt so good. I could feel arousal surging through me, just thinking about what we'd done. I groaned softly. My stupid heart wouldn't slow down. I clutched it, feeling dizzy. I'd never felt like this before in my entire life.
When I was finally brave enough, I went back out to listen to the music. I found my forgotten drink and sat down. I reached for it, but before I could pick it up, it was swept away. I looked up, startled to see a blond man looking down at me sternly. My face reddened. All I could think was that he knew what Axel and I had done in the back, and shrank away from his stern gaze. He looked a lot like me… was he Reno's boyfriend? Had he been monitoring cameras? Oh God, had we been recorded? No… Axel was so careful, he wouldn't let us get caught... I swallowed before finally muttering "...Cloud?" anxiously. He tilted his head at me, trying to place me.
"Do I know you?" I stared at him in amazement. Holy shit, Axel hadn't been exaggerating. It was like looking at an older version of myself.
"I uh just heard that you look like me." I glanced at my drink and then back into his blue eyes. "What are you doing?"
"Just doing my job. Never leave your drink unattended. Someone could drug it. If you want to take risks, go to Seventh Heaven." My face paled.
"T-thanks." He nodded.
"You know my name, what's yours?" I blinked up at him.
"Roxas. Roxas Strife." He smiled a bit.
"Huh, that actually makes sense." He nodded, clarifying at my confused stare. "Cloud Strife. Nice to meet you," he told me with a small smile. "Anyway, let me replace this for you." Before he could get anywhere, Reno appeared, wrapping an arm around around the blond. My blush came back with a vengeance. I was so embarrassed I thought I was going to die.
"Roxas! You made my Cloud smile, tell me your secret!" Cloud scoffed darkly and I laughed despite myself. It sounded painfully anxious.
"Oh I think we're related, that's all." I told him. Reno gave me a small smile.
"Please marry Axel, then we can be related too." Cloud's frown deepened.
"We aren't married Reno. Wait… Axel," Cloud glanced at the bar and then back at me. "Oh that makes sense," he murmured with a small chuckle.
"We should be, babe, it'd be perfect," Reno purred back, openly flirting. Cloud scoffed.
"Are you sure you and Axel aren't already related?" I muttered. His glittering blue eyes met mine and I realized I'd set myself up.
"Just best friends, why does he sound just like me?" He cooed. I sighed dramatically and turned my gaze to Cloud.
"Don't worry about that drink, I'll go grab it myself. Nice to meet you, Cloud." Reno absolutely pouted and I ran away as quickly as possible, hearing the blond chuckle behind me. I made my way up to the stage instead, enjoying the show. I wasn't ready to face Axel yet. Just thinking about him left my head spinning.
He left me to my own devices for the rest of the night. I couldn't get him out of my head or stop myself from glancing at him. I felt extra aware as it approached two in the morning until, finally, he found me. My heart immediately went into overdrive. His arm slid around my waist and he pulled me close. "Let's go home." I nodded shakily.
"Yeah, okay." He paused, his gaze full of concern.
"Are you okay."
"I feel… dizzy," I admitted. He led me to a seat, looking worried as he searched my eyes. He felt my forehead and asked,
"What's going on baby?" I took a breath.
"Idunno. Tingly and my heart won't stop pounding." He paused. Then he gave me a soft smile and took my hand, to press it against his own racing hart.
"Its okay, its part of really liking someone," he explained. I gave him a horrified stare.
"Is my brain going to melt like Sora's?" He chuckled softly and pressed my fingers to his lips, making my breath catch.
"No, baby, but you're going to feel good and happy I hope." I stared up into his eyes.
"How do you know?" I asked. He shrugged and told me.
"That's how I feel when I'm with you." I realized then that he felt the same way about me and my heart went into overdrive. "Lets go home," he suggested. I nodded, murmuring some form of consent and he led me to his car before driving me back to his place.
I couldn't focus until his fingers laced with mine, and he gently tugged me inside. I gazed up into his eyes helplessly as he locked the door behind us. His lips curved up and he took my other hand, guiding my hands up to either side of my head, gently trapping me against the wall behind me. Then, he was kissing me deeply, coaxing my tongue into his mouth with his own. He didn't stop until I was a whimpering mess. I kissed him back and he matched my enthusiasm. Somehow we ended up in the living room, losing clothes along the way. I was shuddering as he straddled my hips and ground down against me. I was breathing harshly, breaking away as he purred in my ear, "Get on your knees."
"Here?" I gasped belatedly. I gasped when his tongue traced the outer shell of my ear and he nipped my earlobe gently before sucking harshly. I moaned uncontrollably and lanky fingers trailed my ribcage.
"Yeah, here," he breathed, his warm breath fanning my face, "there isn't going to be a single room in this house where I won't have you," he promised. I swallowed harshly and let him guide me until he was taking me for a second time. True to his word, we didn't stop all night. I was so exhausted but felt so good. At some point, we ended up in his bed, his body wrapped around mine protectively. He sighed in contentment, just watching me.
"Aren't you tired yet?" I teased, chuckling breathlessly.
"Let me enjoy you," he told me, shushing me softly. I furrowed my brows in confusion and he pressed his lips to mine for a long moment. "Let me dream," he murmured softly, his eyes sliding shut.
"I don't understand…"
"That's okay," he answered. I scoffed at him and I swear he could feel it cos he chuckled and chided, "Don't look at me in that tone of voice, baby." I automatically softened against him.
"Tell me." He glanced at me, smiling a little. "I won't go anywhere," I promised. He held out his pinkie and I laughed despite myself and linked them together. He pressed his forehead to mine, his eyes fluttering shut.
"I want your heart to belong to me. Have I reached it yet?" he asked softly. I was speechless. No words would come out. It scared me that the answer might be yes. Before I could freak out too much, I realized his breathing had gotten heavier. He'd fallen asleep. Oh thank God. I held him against me, unable to fall asleep as that question floated around in my mind.
I knew I really liked him and that he really liked me. How much did he like me. Wait. Oh God. What if he was in love with me? I wasn't ready for that. I couldn't stop looking at him, feeling all sorts of vulnerable as my stomach did gymnastics and my thoughts raced. It was so much… too much. I was fidgeting and finally settled for rolling onto my back. It must have been disturbing him because he tiredly asked,
"Can't sleep?" I froze for a long moment.
"Axel…" He hummed and I turned my head to look at him. "Are you in love with me?" His green eyes fluttered open and he gave me a small smile.
"Baby, that's not something you're ready for. Don't stress about it," he answered gently, pulling me back into his arms and stroking my skin softly. "We've got nothing but time," and even though he didn't answer my question, he put me at ease, his gentle touches soothing me to sleep.
xXx