Set in 3x03 after Alex gets shot. They are still people with feelings and there's no way the incident didn't affect Nikita mentally

There was so much blood. Nikita tried her best to keep Alex conscious on the ride to Division. The agent tried to hide her panic to keep her best friend calm. This was not supposed to happen. It stung even more knowing the bullet was intended for her. She was supposed to be protecting Alex and she failed. Nikita had to stop or she would start spiralling even more. She had to focus on the young woman in her arms.

Alex was panicking, clutching onto Nikita's hand. Everything was blurry. She could barely register what her friend was saying. She tried to avoid looking at all the blood on her and around her. It freaked her out even more. It wasn't because she wasn't used to seeing blood, it was because it was her blood.

They finally reached Division. The medical team was waiting for them along with Sean. They rushed Alex into Medical. Nikita followed her to the end of the corridor and let go. Her best friend was in good hands now. Worry was replaced by fury and determination. She was going to get the bitch that did this.

Nikita walked into ops to find chaos. Sonya and Birkhoff were going at each other's throats. To her, it seemed pointless. She didn't blame anyone from her team. They did their best and she made sure to express that. It was not the time for laying out frustrations. This wasn't over.

The room was quiet while she made her way to Ryan and Michael. Her appearance definitely shook everybody. She had gone straight to ops without stopping to clean up first. She didn't care. They had to get going.

Michael and Ryan threw glances at each other. Nikita was running on anger. It was understandable. If you hurt anyone from her team (her family) you were a dead man. They were all worried about Alex. Ryan felt responsible but was quickly dismissed by the agent. She had to pull herself together and get Mia. She didn't care about anything else. So after a quick debrief she left to clean up.

Michael followed her. He was worried. Of course, she would dismiss him and say she was fine. It was Nikita after all. He knew he would have more luck for her to open up if they were alone. He found her in one of the bathrooms with a wet towel in her hands. She wasn't scrubbing the blood away, however, she was staring at it.

"When I asked if you were alright I didn't mean just physically?" He spoke gently, running his hand on her back. "I'm not the one who was shot or the one that has to see the love of their life covered in blood, losing consciousness. So yes, I would say I'm alright." She said through gritted teeth. She didn't want to snap at Michael but she had no intention of getting into this right now.

"You watched Alex get shot. You held her to all the way here and judging by all of this blood on you it wasn't easy. I think that also fits into the categories you mentioned" Seeing Nikita covered in blood sent chills all over his body even if it wasn't her own. He hated when she would undermine her own feelings and put others before her. She wasn't okay so he had to step in.

Nikita was still standing still so he turned her around, picked her up and placed her on the counter. She didn't react. Her eyes were focused somewhere in the distance. She hadn't looked at him at all. Michael always managed to get everything out of her and that was the main reason she avoided eye contact. It was hard to be strong with a person you had been vulnerable with so many times.

He took the towel from her hand and gently started cleaning up all the blood. She could feel all her walls crumbling down. Something about his gentle touch made her body relax and her defences fell down. He didn't say more, just focused on her. Between cleaning her up he also caressed her hand, intertwined their fingers, laid kisses on her forehead and temple. "She aimed at me" Nikita whispered, finally deciding to let it all out. She was getting too emotional to rush out to the field again anyway so she had to just say it out loud.

Michael's heart stopped for a second. So this could have been her blood. He guessed what had happened after that but it was best to let her talk. "So what happened?"

Nikita took a deep breath, replaying the moment for the millionth time in her head. "Mia was by the van passing the guard. Alex and I were just getting out into the garage. Alex was in front of me… Everything happened so fast. She pulled a gun then Alex just shoved me away and…and took the bullet." tears streamed down her face.

"Nikita, it wasn't your fault and you know it." Michael was quick to reassure her. They've had previous conversations like this. Nikita was getting around to accepting things as they were in those situations but it was a hard and slow process.

She choked on her sobs and he quickly pulled her in his arms."It's okay. You can let it all out. Seeing someone you love hurt is never easy. We are not immune to it either so stop bottling it up." Michael pulled away slightly and cradled her face. She finally looked at him. "You are allowed to feel scared for her and shaken up from what happened but Alex did not take a bullet for you so that you can blame yourself. "

"Okay." she sniffled a reply. She knew he was right. It was just hard fighting all the horrible thoughts in her head. Taking in his words she realized that Alex would probably be so mad at her seeing her like this. She had to complete their mission and she could return to her best friend to take care of her.

"We would all take a bullet for each other in a heartbeat and you know that better than anyone cause you would be the first one to jump in. " That made her chuckle. He continued to hold her close and clean up the remaining blood. His words however were a double-edged sword. Her mind created the horrible image of all her loved ones shot.

"Michael?" She pulled him as close as possible. "Yes, love" he laid a kiss on her forehead and threw the towel away because he was finished. He could fully focus on comforting her now.

"Whatever the fuck you do, don't ever take a bullet for me. I don't care if you have to push us off a cliff or I don't know just don't let me go through that with you." she clutched onto his jacket. He wrapped her in his arms and hugged her tightly. Michael wanted to protest but It wasn't going to be worth it or fair. If he was being completely honest he wouldn't want her to take a bullet for him either. He wouldn't want anyone from their friends to do that.

They stayed in the bathroom for a while. It settled her nerves and Nikita felt definitely lighter. She was able to breathe more easily now and clear her mind. It was very late now. The adrenaline had started to come down and she felt drained.

Michael could see that "Come on, let's go home. We are done for the night here." There was nothing more they could do as of right now. Birkhoff was working on finding any leads or intel on Mia's phone but so far nothing. They had to rest and prepare for whatever they had coming next.

"I want to stop by Alex first." Nikita wasn't just going to leave without making sure Alex was stable. They hadn't heard anything so that was a good sign (at least they hoped). It was a gunshot wound to the shoulder but it was still a nasty one. The amount of blood she lost was also concerning.

"Yeah, of course." He helped her off the counter and took a hold of her hand, intertwining their fingers. She squeezed his hand back and kept the strong hold. They reached Medical and saw the doctor coming out. Before they even asked he updated them on Alex's condition. The doctor had done that several times already to all members of their team after they rushed to Medical.

"She is stable now. Luckily the bullet didn't cause too much harm internally. She woke up for a little bit after we patched her up but due to the blood loss it is normal to drift in and out of consciousness. We'll leave her here for a few days to monitor. I don't expect any complications, however"

The couple thanked the doctor and stood outside watching through the window. Alex was on the bed all patched up. She was still a little bit pale but looked significantly better than when they brought her in. Sean was by her side like a guardian. That made Nikita feel better about leaving. Alex wasn't going to be alone and she was in the best hands possible.

Sean spotted them and waved for them to come in. "She drifted off a while ago. The doctor said she'll probably wake back up in the morning." The couple nodded. Michael moved next to Sean and patted him on the shoulder to make sure he was alright as well. It wasn't easy for any of them but he could imagine how scared the Seal must have been.

Sean appreciated it and he got up from his chair so Nikita could be closer to Alex while he and Michel talked to the side. Nikita thanked him and quickly sat down to be by Alex. She took a hold of her hand and brushed some strands of hair out of her face. "You'll be okay" she whispered "I am going to make sure this wasn't for nothing. "

While she kept holding Alex's hand she looked around. It was a standard treatment of a gunshot wound plus the additional monitoring. Nikita had to make sure and see for herself that everything was okay. She was planning on returning first thing in the morning. She would truly calm down once she saw Alex awake. The young woman really did scare her in the van on the way to Division.

After a while, it was time to go. Sean had to rest too, although she doubted he will be able to sleep. She squeezed her best friend's hand goodbye, laid a kiss on her forehead "I love you" and she and Michael said good night to Sean.

They got home. Michael tried to make her eat something but she didn't want to. He managed to win over only a few bites which he decided was as much as he was going to get with her. "Shower?" He pulled her in his arms and kissed her forehead. She was thankful for his gentle touch and constant comfort but she wanted to be alone for a little bit.

"Can I kick you out of the shower tonight? I just need a moment." She joked so he wouldn't worry. Michael never left her alone in difficult moments so she knew he'll hesitate. If Nikita reassured him that she was really okay he will let her go, through.

They always got ready for the day and for bed together. Those moments were her favourite parts of each day even. She just needed a moment to breathe and be alone. Michael had been by her side every second since they returned from the mission. She wasn't complaining at all. His presence helped with her anxiety so much. But sometimes she just needed her alone time.

He studied her face and searched her eyes for indication of anything worrying. He nodded when he was somewhat sure she would be alright. He sent her off with a kiss and started cleaning up after their dinner.

He was done pretty quickly and contemplated on what to do next. He had the option to go shower in the guest bathroom, but that meant that he would be done around the same time Nikita got out as well. That wouldn't leave her much time alone. He decided it would be better to just wait for her to finish in the shower and hop in after her. Then she could have more time to herself. Michael could also do something nice for her while waiting. He made her a cup of tea. It always helped her wind down and fall asleep easier. He also got the book she was currently reading from the coffee table. She usually read before bed. He wasn't sure if she will tonight but he brought it anyway in case. He left them at her nightstand. There was an electric fireplace in their bedroom. He put it on to make it extra warm and cosy and just sat down and waited.

"Hey, I didnt want you to wait. I thought you would shower in the other bathroom" she felt bad. She was in there for a while. He silenced her with a kiss and a sweet smile "I prefer it like that. Now get dressed and go snuggle into the covers" He gave her one last kiss and went into the bathroom.

Nikita opened her drawers to get dressed. She wanted something warm and comfy. Nothing in her wardrobe appealed to her so she decided to steal one of Michael's sweaters. At that point, it had become her sweater because she regularly wore it to bed. Michael didn't complain. There was something so adorable about seeing her wearing something his.

She walked out of the closet and noticed the fire was on. She smiled and walked over to her side of the bed to find another surprise - a warm cup of tea next to her book with little wrapped chocolates on top. She always craved something sweet in the evening.

Michael melted her heart. He always did little things like that. It was more special than any grand gesture especially when she wasn't feeling well. She felt so much better after her shower, however. The silence mixed with the water running down settled her down. She was ready for Michael to join her. In the meantime, she could enjoy her tea and her book.

Soon enough he emerged from the bathroom. He saw the wrappers of the chocolates thrown to the side already, the book in her hands with her cup of tea and smiled brightly. She was okay.

Michael walked around the bed to their closet and threw on a pair of boxers. The fire had warmed up the room so he didn't need more. As soon as he got into bed Nikita put away her book and got fully on top of him, snuggling up in his chest. He chuckled and instantly welcomed the embrace.

One hand cradled her head, the other ran along her spine and gently rubbed her back. She hummed her approval. "Want some back scratches?" he spoke softly. She excitedly nodded. That was their little thing after an exhausting day.

He buried his hands under her shirt (his shirt which made him grin even more) and lightly dragged along his nails on her back. He did that for a while and thought she might have drifted off but she lifted her head off his chest. Nikita looked at him so lovingly that he just had to kiss her. "Michael Bishop I don't de-"

"Nikita Mears I don't deserve you" he was quick to cut her off. And to make sure the argument was settled he sealed it with another kiss. He knew what she would say. Nikita always made that comment whenever he would show such care towards her. She didn't believe he did it because she deserved it. To her, it was just who Michael was.

She chuckled and decided not to protest this time. It had been a DAY. Luckily, everyone was okay. Alex was stable. She was able to get a hold of her emotions. And Michael was by her side.

"I love you" she bumped her forehead against his and beamed.

" I love you, baby" he stole a last kiss from her and pulled the covers to cover them. They snuggled, comforting one another. They were going to get through another day together and many more to come.

I don't know how I always manage to make everything about these two but oh well haha. Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Thank you for all the love as always. I really appreciate it and reading your thoughts on the chapters is what motivates me to keep going xx