"What are you doing here Harry? I thought you were in Australia" Willow said, shocked that her ex had suddenly reappeared. "Hey Wills. Im back for ten days for my brothers birthday and i had to come see you. You look good" Harriet said as Willow sighed. "What do you want Harry? You left, remember" "I know Wills, and im so so sorry for the way i left." Harriet replied as she entered Willows home. "I never should have left you the way i did Willow. Ive hated myself ever since" Harriet said as the two former lovers stood face to face. "Do you know what i was like that day? How much of a mess i was?" Willow said, holding back tears. "I couldnt face coming home, Thom and Luke had to force me. I barely spoke to the girls or acknowledged Matt, until he wrestled a knife out of my hand that was cutting deep into my arm" Willow replied, holding up her scarred arm. "What the hell Will? I thought you were past all that" Harriet said as she stroked Willows scar. "I was so hurt, so angry that cutting myself was the only pain relief. I was so low, so depressed i scared Matt. But we've been had a few really good talks and are getting into a good place for the girls" Willow said, feeling her heart jump as Harriet touched her. "Wills, im so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. But that final night was perfect. I didnt want to wake you to say goodbye because it was too hard" Harriet said, moving closer to Willow, who instinctivly stepped back. "Leaving you that night was the worst decision ive ever made" Harriet said as Willow replied "I think you need to go. I cant be around you, youre messing with my head" "Do you really want me to go?" Harriet asked as she moved closer to her ex, her hand touching Willows as she once again stepped away. "Harry, i cant. Im moving back homein a few days"Willow said, not telling Harriet about her and Matt. "You're moving back?" Harriet asked as Willow nodded. "I go on Thursday. Going to stay with Elly for a few days, then mom while the house gets finished" she replied as she and Harriet stood inches apart, face to face, as Harriet suddenly kissed a surprised Willow. "Harry...I...ca" Willow said as they pulled apart, before Harriet kissed her again, only this time Willow reciprocated and led her upstairs where they had sex for the first time in a month.
"Was that Wills? Hows she doing Matt?" Adam asked as he sat next to one of his oldest friends. "Yeah it was, and Jas saying goodnight. Shes struggling a little, shes missing everyone" Matt replied, as he scrolled through some of the last pictures hed taken of them as a family. "Shes feeling like her depression is returning so shes going to see Thom tomorrow" he said as Adam glanced at the photos. "You guys look happy. Like a proper family" Adam said as Matt sighed. "You know i love her Ads. Wills and the girls, theyre everything to me and i hate that shes struggling" he said as Adam asked "You two getting close again?" as Matt nodded. "We had some really good conversations after you guys had gone. We cleared the air and decided that we need to work on building trust, showing a united front for the girls" he said as he stopped at one of the photos taken on Willows birthday. "She needs time to heal. Not just from the cancer, but the Victor stuff and the break up with Harriet. They hit her harder than she made out. I just wish she wasnt alone right now" Matt said, completely unaware of what was happening almost 400 miles away.
Willow and Harriet lay in bed next to each other, Willow feeling confused and guilty about the events that had just happened. "Wills? You ok?" Harriet asked quietly as she moved closer to her ex. "This shouldnt have happened Harry. Im sorry but i think you should go" Willow replied as Harriet stayed still. "Youre still in love with Matt arent you?" Harriet asked as Willow nodded. "Theres a part of me that never stopped. Theres other stuff going on with me too, my head has been spinning for weeks" Willow replied, holding back tears. "I still love you, Victor got arrested and my cancer is in remission. Im moving back home next week and i didnt think id see you again" "Why didnt you tell me any of this before we had sex?" Harriet asked, brushing hair out of Willows face. "I didnt know how too. Theres more to Matt and I's relationship. We kissed a while back, just before you left for Australia actually" Willow replied, Harriets heart breaking. "Did you kiss him when we were together? Have you fucked him?" she asked as Willow shook her head. "We kissed after we broke up, before your final night. And no, we've not fucked" she lied, seeing the hurt on her exs face. "I think youre right Wills, i need to go. Coming here was a mistake" Harriet said as she got out of bed and dressed quickly. "Harry, i didnt want things to end this way" Willow said as the two former lovers headed downstairs. "I know Wills, i didnt either. I hope you end up happy and stay cancer free for a long long time" Harriet replied as Willow reached out for her hand. "Hey, thank you for taking my favourite pictures of me and thank you for being my rock for those last seven months. I would never made it through without you" she said as Harriet smiled at her, saying "Goodbye Wills" for the final time, before heading out into the cold, dark night.
Willow sat in the living area in the dark, her eyes stinging from the tears she'd shed over her final break up with Harriet. I wish i could speak to Matt. I just need him to tell me that everything will be alright, but i cant disturb him on the bus. Plus I dont want to reveal our relationship, if we can even call it that, to everyone. She thought to herself as she heard a creak on the stairs. Wiping away the remaining tears, she turned around as she saw Jasmine coming down the stairs. "Hey Jasdoll, what are you doing up?" she asked as Jasmine climbed on the sofa next to her. "I had a dream that you was sad momma and that you needed cuddles" Jasmine said as she cuddled into Willow, who gladly reciprocated them. "Are you sad momma?" Jasmine asked as Willow nodded, "a little bit Jas. But ive got you and Ruby here and you make me happy" she replied as Jasmine asked "Does dada make you happy?" as Willow sighed. "He did Jas, for a long long time, and then we had that big falling out but he's starting to make up for it and i dont know how he did it, but he really surprised me on my birthday. Hes starting to make me happy again" Willow replied as she kissed her daughters head. "Do you love him momma?" Jasmine asked. "I dont know Jas. Me and dada, its complicated. I guess theres a part of me that will always love him" Willow replied as Jasmine yawned. "Want to come cuddle with me in my bed Jas?" Willow asked as Jasmine nodded as mother and daughter headed upstairs.
"So whats been going on Wills?" Thom asked the next morning as Jasmine and Ruby were colouring in on the floor. "I dont even know where to start Thom" Willow replied "start at your birthday" as Willow told him everything that had happened since, from the cancer remission to Victors arrest to kissing Matt. How she felt like she was in a constant battle within herself. Only holding back on her and Matt sleeping together. "Then Harriet turned up last night and that shook me" "Wait Harrys back? Since when?" Thom asked as Willow shook her head. "I dont know. She said she was back for ten days for her brothers birthday and that she was sorry for how she left" Willow replied "I guess she'll call you and Luke when shes ready to see you. Probably once ive gone home" "How was it? Seeing her again?" Thom asked. "It was...intense. Especially how we ended up in bed together" Willow replied. "You and Harry? Does this mean you guys are back on?" he asked as Willow shook her head. "We ended it for good..." she said as Thom cut her off. "But you still love her right? Where does Matt fit in?" He asked as Willow sighed. "I dont know. When we kissed, it stirred up alot of mixed feelings inside of me, but i cant just switch off my feelings for Harriet. Im all over the place" She said. "Are you eating and sleeping Wills?" Thom asked, as Willow shook her head, "Barely. Im still terrified that Victor is going to show up even though he got caught and is currently in jail. Im scared the cancer will return, im battling feelings for two people and coming to terms that im bisexual" she said as Thom hugged her. "I think your depression is fighting back, but its more PTSD related. What i want you to do when you get home, is make an appointment with Dr Britt and get a therapist. I think theres more going on in your head than you know and having a third party to listen will help clear your head" Thom replied "I know youre going to be twenty minutes away from everyone, but i still think youre going to need their support. Matts especially. But for now, im going to prescribe some antidepressants, which should help you relax" "Thanks Thom. For everythig youve done since ive come back" Willow said as she leaned into her friend. "Why dont you and Luke come over for dinner on Wednesday night, one final feast before me and the girls head off?" Willow asked as Thom nodded, "That would be really nice. Its going to be too quiet without you here Wills"
"Hey Wills, how you doing?" Matt asked over facetime the next night. "Ive had a few bad days. Today was a really bad day Matt, i really struggled to even get out of bed. But I did speak to Thom yesterday" Willow replied as she sat on the sofa. "Hes prescribed antidepressants but suggested i get a therapist as i may have PTSD induced depression. Anyways, where are you tonight?" she asked as he walked to his hotel window and replied "Just got to Madrid. Got Malaga and Barcelona to visit, then i'll be meeting you and the girls in Paris where i have the four days off" showing her the views of the city. "Matt i need to tell you something" Willow said quietly, as Matt sat on his bed. "Wills what is it?" He asked, suddenly worried about his secret lover. "Harriet turned up the night before last" she said, as he interrupted her before she could finish. "What was that like? Seeing her again?" He asked as Willow took a deep breath. "It was intense. Its part of why i've been struggling these last few days. She apologised for leaving the way she did, and she kissed me. Twice, right before we ended up in bed together one final time" she said as she felt her eyes watering. "Matt, im sorry. I had to tell you. Can we talk about it when i see you?" she asked apologetically as Matt nodded. "Wills its ok. We're still figuring stuff out, but if you want to talk about it when i see you, we can" he replied, before adding "Why dont you head on to bed Wills, you look exhausted" He said as Willow nodded. "I miss sleeping next to you Matt. I know ive fucked up in the past but i do love you" she said as Matt replied "You havent fucked up, and i love you too. I'll see you in a few days" before ending the call, formulating an idea in his head at the Harriet revelation.