14. Can't Go Home For Rach with Alan. Was going to do an Alan&Scott, but since it is the Squid's day…
Characters: Alan, Scott, John, Virgil, Gordon.
Warnings: Earthquake, Building Collapse, implied MCD
He squeezed his eyes closed and dug the heels of his hands in. He'd turned the TV over and caught an image of someone swimming, and before he'd realised what he was watching he was crying and shaking again.
And then he'd thrown the remote through the TV screen.
Another payment to make, another renumeration.
He'd never be able to make recompense for what he had done, though. He'd never be able to face them.
He'd never be able to go home.
And for the umpteen night in a row Alan cried himself to sleep.
'John, report on the last building.'
'Building is currently stable, one life sign.'
'FAB. Alan, Gordon, how's your rescue going?'
'Alan's holding the wall fine, I'm just about to reach the last victim.'
'FAB, Gordon. Virgil?'
'Just bringing out the last person now, Scott.'
'Ok. I'm in the same position. Virgil, drop your person off and I'll meet you at the last building.'
'But Scott, I can go!'
'Negative, Alan. Gordon needs you to hold that wall firm until he's out.'
'But Scott…'
'You have your orders. One out.'
Alan fumed. Everyone was rescuing someone except for him. Why on earth was he just holding a wall when there was someone who needed rescuing and he was free? The pod could be programmed to hold still without him.
As he fumed silently John yelled.
'Aftershock!'
The vibrations were not that bad, not really, and Alan listened as John filled Scott in. That last building was becoming unstable, but both his older brothers were nearly back to the triage base and Gordon had managed to reach the person and protect them while the shock hit.
Blow it, he was going. Setting the pod to hold, Alan dashed out. He could be there and out before Scott and Virgil arrived.
He ran across to the building and up the stairs. He'd barely made the stairs before both John and Scott were yelling at him, but Alan ignored them to help the woman he found with the cupboard on her leg.
He'd just got it clear when John's voice cut through everything, freezing him.
'Aftershock!'
This one was bigger. The building shook and Alan threw himself over the woman. Nothing hit them, and it was with relief he stood up. The building was far more secure than he had thought.
His three older brothers were shouting, but once more he ignored them, helping the lady up and out. It was as he exited the building that the full impact of what had happened hit him.
The building that Alan was in may not have been damaged, but the building he should have been holding up was no longer standing. The pod was on its' side.
And Gordon was nowhere to be seen.
It was then that Alan realised that his brothers weren't shouting at him. They were calling for Gordon. Virgil and Scott were already there, tearing through the rubble.
There was no answer.
The building was flat.
Alan was an experienced first responder. He'd pulled bodies from buildings that had more substance to them than this one. He walked the woman over to the triage area on automatic.
He'd disobeyed an order.
He'd disobeyed an order and killed his brother.
He'd killed his brother.
He turned and retched.
'Alan? Alan! Al, we need you!'
Scott's voice was harsh and rasping, the effort he was expending clear to hear. But Alan couldn't move. It was like his blood had turned to ice. John joined in calling him, and still he stood there, not replying but watching the frantic efforts of his brothers and some of the other rescue teams moving rubble to reach his best friend.
It felt like forever, but eventually a shout went up and Alan knew Gordon had been found. He stumbled forward a step at the news only to freeze as Virgil's voice bellowed.
'He's not breathing! I need a Defib here!'
But it was the sound of Scott counting that broke him.
'1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6…'
He tore off his helmet and ran, discarding bits of uniform until he was in his shorts and t-shirt. Heedless of where he was heading, he just needed to get away.
His brother was dead and it was all his fault.
He couldn't face seeing Virgil, that sad look he would have.
He couldn't face the logic from his space brother.
He couldn't face the disappointment from his hero, from Scott.
Alan ran.