He leans back in the chair, looking at the small black and green sire sitting behind the desk in front of him.
"This is a sensation, Particle! It will be the discovery of the century!"
"Just be careful, Thundercracker." Particle warns with a crease of worry between his brows. "These are highly dangerous criminals if what you tell me turns out to be true."
Thundercracker waves his editor's worry away.
"I have one of them curled around my littlest digit. Nothing will happen. I know when to pull out. I just need a bit more for my article, then I will involve the authorities."
?Thundercracker01%. Verified. Data stored. Thundercracker01%.
Thundercracker. Please come back to me.
He turns his attention to the medical berth and the grotesque sight of the black and purple seeker's suspended wings. Titanium bars stick out of Skywarp's back, fastening his wings to his spinal strut with large adjustable screws. The wing-hinges and the rest of the wing structure are pierced through by more delicate-looking equipment that fixates them in the correct position to heal.
A feeling stirs within his spark, and he moves closer to the berth.
Skywarp cannot see him, his head in a recess in the berth to keep his back straight, and Thundercracker gets a closer look at the extent of the damage.
The feeling stirs again, and he sits down in the chair beside the berth, sadness in his optics.
What kind of trauma can make a seeker do this to himself?
His spark overflows with a strong feeling of sympathy, and he reaches hesitantly for Skywarp's hand, uncertain about the other seeker's reaction to his offer of comfort.
?Thundercracker02%. Verified. Data stored. Thundercracker02%.
You are having a seizure for unknown reasons.
His full attention is on the comatose Skywarp lying on the sole berth inside the ICU.
It is silent, aside from the respirator and the frequent blips from the machinery keeping the black and purple seeker alive.
To see Skywarp like this-...
No stupid smile on his lips.
No sparkling life in his offline optics.
No field.
No sign of life except for the movements caused by the machinery.
It is as if Skywarp is gone.
Dead.
Only the steady line of a stable spark pulse on a monitor indicates that the seeker in front of him is alive, and it puts his life into perspective.
What if Skywarp never wakes?
What is he going to do then?
?Skywarp02%. Verified. Data stored. Skywarp02%.
I don't want to lose you!
A large dark blue and white sire lies on top of him with his legs between his wide-spread hips, moving against him, making him feel a delightful tingling in his whole frame when the stiff part of the sire inside him connects with something that feels deep inside him.
"You like it?"
He doesn't understand what the sire means, not understanding the word like and just nods, happy when it gets a positive reaction and the sire does something that makes him feel even more good.
He wants to feel this good all the time. He doesn't want the sire to stop. He wants to please him so he can feel like this all the time.
This is his purpose.
To make this sire happy so he makes him feel happy and good.
Suddenly the sire pushes the stiff part hard into him and he feels a stab of something unpleasant before a good feeling he can't describe fills his whole frame. He can no longer control it, shaking and screaming as the good feeling builds into something he no longer can handle, rupturing into an even better feeling.
He barely registers the sire heavily on him, only the good feeling and then an ache between his legs when the sire rises and pulls the thing put into him out.
"Good little slave."
The sire's voice is full of praise, and it makes him happy to hear.
He had done good then.
"W-w-w-w-wwh-h-he-n-n n-n-nne-x-x-x-t?"
The sire laughs and touches his head encouragingly, clearly pleased by his question.
"You have no idea how good it is to have you back like this. So eager to please and suck me dry of transfluid. Soon. I promise you. Very soon."
?T%&¤#"=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?To&¤#"=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?Tor¤#"=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?Torr#"=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?Torre"=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?Torren=03. Data corrupted. Restoring... ?Torrent03. Verified. Data stored. Torrent03.
Fight free of it!
Is it a dream?
Is Skywarp truly not going to take advantage of him?
Of his vulnerability?
He stares, mesmerized, while Skywarp slowly leans forward and reaches out to caress a running tear away from his cheek. The thumb lingers against his plating, rubbing soothingly, and he leans into the touch.
"They won't let me fly."
There is understanding in Skywarp's optics.
A gentle caress along his right wing has him whimpering.
"You're beautiful."
The motion gets repeated and the last of his guard falls.
His stressed systems start to relax while his wing leans into the touch that follows its outline.
More! Not enough!
Skywarp chuckles good-naturedly, reading his desperate need in his field.
"Let's get this unhealthy tension out of you."
The berth creaks and then he gets pulled against a strong frame.
Their lips meet and any remaining thought drowns in pleasure.
?Skywarp02%. Verified. Data stored. Skywarp02%.
Hotspot is trying to bring you back.
Thundercracker looks up at Nacelle from his - Error-1428! Can't compute!
He looks at the dark blue and white sire standing off to the side at the political gathering in the Senate's grand - Error-1429! Can't compute!
His survival instinct prompts him to flee, but fear paralyzes him, and he is helpless while Torrent, like a predator, approaches him with a malevolent smile - Error-1430! Can't compute!
The procedure commences, and he instinctively fights a fierce mental battle against the outlier ability in a desperate attempt to retain his memories when Retrograde turns her ability against his dearest memories of - Error-1431! Can't compute!
Error! Can't compute!
Error! Can't compute!
Error! Can't compute!
Error! Can't compute!
Please. Please. Come back to me. Come back.
Warning - Overheating!
Overheat - Critical!
Self-Preservation Protocol - Activated.
Emergency Shutdown - Imminent!
Stasis - Initiating!
3...
2...
1...
Hotspot looks at the live images of Thundercracker's processor generated by the scanner and frowns in worry. Nothing he sees makes any sense to him. This is the first time in a long time he stands without an immediate answer to the reason for a processor-related problem, but Thundercracker is also a first.
Thundercracker's processor looks like a cascade of fireworks as numerous areas continuously light up in disorganized waves of activity that spread like wildfire and sets new areas afire.
"Thundercracker. Please come back to me."
He ignores Skywarp's desperate voice as he pulls up his vast library of images taken from other patients, looking for something similar to what he sees unfold within Thundercracker's processor. The first image he comes across piques his interest. It is a recent one. Belonging to another of Retrograde's victims.
"You are having a seizure for unknown reasons."
Could it be?
He pulls up images of other victims, seeing the same faint pattern, all starting and ending in the memory center.
"I don't want to lose you!"
He looks up, looking at Thundercracker still caught up in the seizure.
The others had not been affected as radically by Retrograde as Thundercracker had. Their reactions could have been smaller and easy to oversee as a reaction to regaining their memories. Whereas Thundercracker has a lot of memories to regain, some of which are entirely out of their reach because there no longer is any data of them. Unable to be restored during an upload, but maybe possible to be recalled through a spontaneous memory recall?
"Fight free of it!"
They will only know when Thundercracker fights free of the seizure and regains consciousness.
Decision made Hotspot moves to the cabinet where they have their sedatives and hurriedly pulls a dose into a syringe.
"Hotspot is trying to bring you back."
Administering it directly into one of the major energon lines leading straight into Thundercracker processor, he stands back, waiting anxiously for any reaction. Hopefully, it will slow Thundercracker's processor down so much that it will stop the cascade of data being processed and stop the uncontrollable memories, if he is correct in his hypothesis, from being stored in Thundercracker's memory.
"Please. Please. Come back to me. Come back."
Instead of stopping the seizure, the sedative seems to worsen it, causing even more chaos within Thundercracker's processor, and then, when it no longer can handle anymore, it all shuts down, Thundercracker going limp and still in the scanner as his systems shut down and stasis claims him to protect his processor from irrevocable damage.
"Is it over? Is he okay?" Skywarp whispers, deep worry in his voice as he looks at Thundercracker lying lifeless in the scanner.
"It is over, but I can't tell you if he is okay before he wakes up. His emergency systems worked, shutting him down, so there is hope that any damage won't be irrevocable."
"Any idea why this happened?" Nacelle asks.
Hotspot looks at him.
"I have a theory - spontaneous memory recalls. If I am right, it occurred when we restored the memory of Retrograde's other victims but went under our radar because they have been so insignificant that they could have been caused by anything. With Thundercracker, his situation is entirely different."
"More data to recall," Nacelle says grimly.
"Correct."
"How bad is this?"
"It depends on what memories he gained access to."
Nacelle looks at Thundercracker, feeling a heaviness in his spark.
"It will happen again, won't it?"
Following Nacelle's gaze, Hotspot lets out a deep sigh.
"Yes, it is highly likely. All we can do is try to control what we can as best we can to minimize the damage. I will install a seizure alarm in his system now that he is in stasis. It will alert you when he goes into a new seizure, and hopefully, we can stem the flow of data being processed when I have found out more about what caused the cascade. If I can find the trigger, I can find a way to stop it. Until then, you will have to force him into stasis and bring him to the nearest hospital for close observation."
"And then handle the psychological aftermath when he wakes up with traumatizing memories of his pasts." Nacelle sighs resignedly.
"Thundercracker is a strong individual. He will cope. He might not remember, but he knows that there are unpleasant memories in his past. That alone will help him distinguish himself from them to some extent."
Hotspot looks at Skywarp, gentleness filling his optics.
"You have shared a lot of the pain he has experienced in his former life. He will not be alone with the memories, and your shared experience while he learns to cope with them will help you, too, in your healing process. I know we have focused mainly on Thundercracker, but don't think I don't know how much you are fighting with too. When everything is at its darkest, find solace in your shared love. There will be a time when all of this will be old memories and you can look back at it without having it break you."
Skywarp swallows hard at the recognition of his own traumas.
It is so easy to forget his own suffering in the face of Thundercracker's situation.
"Thank you." He says shakily, unsure what else to say.
He watches from the sideline as Nacelle helps Hotspot install the seizure alarm, feeling more at ease now that he knows people will come to help whenever Thundercracker receives a spontaneous memory recall and that he doesn't have to stand with the situation alone.
He suddenly halts at that thought.
Him and Thundercracker alone together.
It feels so surreal, but it is finally a possibility after so long.
There is no longer any danger to them.
Torrent is dead and they are free to do whatever they want with their lives.
Tears fall from his optics at the realization, and he collapses to his knees on the floor and begins to cry out loud, a flood of suppressed emotions overwhelming him.
He is free!
They are free!
Free to fly in the sky.
Free to walk down the streets.
Free to live the life they choose for themselves.
Together.
His crying slowly dies out, but he remains kneeling on the floor with offline optics, savoring the feeling of freedom in his spark.
When has he ever felt so light in his life?
Never.
The sound of Thundercracker slowly coming to is finally what gets him to online his optics, and he rises hurriedly to go to the blue seeker's side. Fear and worry entirely overshadow the happiness in his spark as he waits with bated breath for Thundercracker to online his optics and say something, anything.
Hotspot steps up on Thundercracker's other side, following the blue seeker's vitals keenly as Thundercracker's processor wakes up from its forced stasis.
"Everything looks good so far."
Skywarp feels comfort in that information.
Thundercracker finally brings his optics online, and they go offline and online a few times before they finally stay online.
"What happened?"
At the sound of Thundercracker's voice, Skywarp can no longer contain himself and picks up the blue seeker's hand and kisses it reverently.
"You went into forced stasis," Hotspot explains softly. "What did you experience, Thundercracker?"
Thundercracker frowns, trying to recall what had happened before he woke up like this.
"I remember someone named Particle. He was...my editor? But I am certain I haven't met him before."
"Anything else?" Hotspot presses on, already satisfied with what Thundercracker has said but needing more information to establish his theory as a fact.
"Skywarp with mangled wings." Thundercracker looks at Skywarp with questions written in his optics.
Skywarp swallows and nods in confirmation.
Thundercracker's optics widen in disbelief.
WHY does he want to ask, but this is not the place or time.
"Then Skywarp in a coma." Again he looks at Skywarp for confirmation.
Skywarp nods again.
Another thing for them to talk about later.
"Then it gets confusing. I had a dark blue and white sire on top of me, stabbing something into me?"
Skywarp pales and looks to Hotspot and then Nacelle.
How to explain that to Thundercracker?
Nacelle shares a worried glance with Hotspot.
That memory should not have occurred because it should be a memory this Thundercracker already possessed.
Belonging to him specifically.
He thinks back to when they liberated Thundercracker from Torrent.
Thundercracker had been newly reformatted.
Only a few hours had passed.
Maybe their arrival, while not timely to save him from the reformat, had somehow helped Thundercracker repress traumatic memories.
He can only hope that that is the case. Otherwise, there is a lot that waits to be taken care of.
How much has Thundercracker bottled up?
What can he expect to unexpectedly tumble out of Thundercracker's proverbial closet?
"Anything else?" Hotspot asks to deflect Thundercracker's curiosity in that memory.
"Me with Skywarp somewhere I don't know."
"And nothing else?"
"There is something, but I can't get a grasp on it. It is as if I know it is there, but I can't bring anything up."
"I had to step in and stop the spontaneous memory recall and sedated you. It might have caused some errors leading to what you currently experience. I hope you understand why I had to step in and do something so drastically?"
Thundercracker nods.
"Some of my memories are unhealthy for me. It needs to be controlled what memories I receive. And you can't control it if spontaneous memories occur."
"Precisely." Hotspot smiles elated at Thundercracker's clear understanding of the issue. "I expect it will happen again, so while you were in stasis, we installed a seizure alarm that will alert Nacelle whenever you get a new spontaneous recall. Until I have found a way to stop them, all we can do is sedate you and keep watch over you when you enter a forced stasis due to the stress the recalls cause your processor."
Nacelle looks at Prowl, who stands off to the side, their strengthened bond full of his intention.
Prowl nods to his silent request.
-Do what you find necessary.-
Nacelle looks back at Thundercracker, his client and friend, knowing that what he is about to do is highly unethical but also necessary from a professional standpoint because how can he not step in to secure Thundercracker the best conditions possible to recover.
The psychiatrists at any given psychiatric hospital will not understand nor react accordingly to what Thundercracker is undergoing with the spontaneous memory recalls.
He will have to find out what to do when he goes to work, but knowing that Thundercracker will be safe in his close proximity during the rest of the day and the night will have to be enough to start with.
"We offer to open our home to you and Skywarp at least until Hotspot has found a way to deal with the memory recalls. Then you can decide for yourselves afterward." He looks from Thundercracker to Skywarp to pull the black and purple seeker into the decision.
"We take your offer," Skywarp says without hesitation.
"Yes. Thank you for the offer, Nacelle. As Skywarp said, we want to take you up on it." Thundercracker states with a gentle smile.
Nacelle fills with relief and smiles back at Thundercracker.
Then that is settled.
Hours later in Iacon:
Athena sees relief fill Torment when they finally enter the tunnel leading down to the safety of the underground stronghold.
The visible lowering of his tense shoulders is something she isn't used to seeing.
Torment usually hides his reactions better than this, which speaks volumes of the danger he had been in as they hurriedly left Praxus.
It is still new for her to think of Prowl as an enemy, but he is.
This experience has shown her why Torment is so strict and needs to be in control all the time. Because one mistake, no matter how big or small, can lead to disaster when you live outside the law.
When those she used to see as protectors are enemies.
She walks towards the exit when the passenger aircraft has landed but is suddenly pulled back by a pair of strong arms around her middle. Looking up, she meets Torment's deeply serious optics, leaning into him to offer him the comfort he at this moment needs.
"I know." She whispers, knowing he never will put his weakness into words.
Talon waits for them when they finally exit the aircraft, and she follows him and Torment as they walk toward the heart of the stronghold, listening silently to what the two of them have to discuss. And more importantly, what they don't discuss in her presence.
There will always be things hidden from her.
Things she doesn't know are happening before they have.
She is not blind to what is going on around her.
They just fled from the planet's largest law-enforcement agency, barely making it out of Praxus without being discovered by the Joint Investigation Unit's numerous search teams.
That alone says it all.
She is in deep, far over her head.
But what can you do when your spark finds its other half?
Nothing.
You are in for the ride, wherever it takes you, and can only hope you land somewhere relatively safe at the end of it.