Triwizard and The List.
Harry walked naked into the great hall. The girls all giggled.
"Potter! One hundred points from Gryffindor!" shouted Snape
"I claim diplomatic immunity, being from another school as I have been declared to be. Number 51. Oh and number 16."
"What?" asked Hermione.
"Number 16; forbidden to come to great hall skyclad," said Harry.
"Mr. Potter," said McGonagall in a hollow voice, "Am I to infer that you have acquired The List?"
"Yes, ma'am," said Harry. "I'm going to work through it until I am removed from the triwizard."
"Albus!" McGonagall was visibly panicking. "You have to find a way to get Harry out of the triwizard, it is imperative, before he starts on the numbers below ten!"
Dumbledore twinkled wildly.
"What can be so bad about this list?"
The rumble of an explosion interrupted him.
"Number 8; forbidden to blow up the astronomy tower," said Harry. "Number 9 about to go off."
There were collective shrieks as every robe in the room became pink and frilly. Snape almost passed out in shock.
"My HERO!" screamed Pansy Parkinson, flinging herself on Harry. Harry snogged her firmly.
"Groundwork for number 2," he said.
"NOOOOOOO!" screamed McGonagall. "Number 2 is 'forbidden to spread my seed throughout four houses', Albus, and now they've seen him naked they are not going to turn him down."
"Bless my soul, how ...maaaaaaah!" said the goat.
"Number 22," said Harry. "Forbidden to turn the headmaster into a goat."
"The four contestants will play a game of gobstones, a game of wizarding chess and a game of exploding snap to void this contest and the real contest can then resume with the three proper contestants," said McGonagall.
"Then I will resume Gryffindor uniform," said Harry.