(New Beijinging)
I would like to thank everyone who reviewed, favorited or followed this story since I last updated it.
Cody Fanatic: Thanks, I'm glad to see you think I did well with their resolution. Also you're right about Noah and Emma, they're one of the best parts of the overall race. I know what you mean about the Adversity Twins, but some things have to be done for the sake of the story. Don't worry though, I try to do justice to as many characters as I can in my stories. Plus Don was more or less just speaking for the fans.
SuperSonicHeroes: You're right about Mother & Daughter getting cut from the race being fairly obvious, but I did try to do them justice. Let's face it, even people who barley know Doctor Who is a thing should recognize that tennis machine as a knockoff of a Dalek. I'm glad to see it was well received. Plus yeah, I was wondering how many people caught onto that little bit about Owen and Izzy.
: Thanks, I'm glad to see you liked it. The interactions between the Surfers and the Best Friends I always enjoy doing, and the exchanges between Kelly and Dwayne already happened in the original, but I gave it an overhaul to a certain extent. Owen and Izzy being married was just a little something I put in there for fun, but I'm glad that it's being received so well by readers. I'm not particularly fond of the Daters as a pair, but you're right, Ryan on his own is a pretty good character. You do make a good point about the third generation characters, and that does seem like a fairly interesting idea. Maybe in another story, seeing how mine is already almost halfway done at this point.
Joel Connell: Thanks, I'm glad to see you liked it. I only made a few small changes to the overall episode, but I'm glad to see they were well received. Let me know if you have any other questions, I'll answer them to the best of my ability.
Frosty Wolf: Yep, there are a multitude of things that improve as time goes on. As for how things will go with Taylor now, we'll just have to wait and see. And yeah, I wanted Dwayne to have a real and serious moment at least once in this fic. Owen and Izzy being married was a little idea I had while doing this chapter that I thought people would get a kick out of. There aren't many relationships in Total Drama that are stable to begin with, but one thing that you can't deny about Izzy is that she never fails to surprise people.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Last time on the Ridonculous Race, we ended up striking emotional gold as we took our race around the world to Dubai. Carrie almost let herself give up on the game of love, we found out that apparently Owen eloped in Vegas, and with Dwayne giving her some much needed coaching on parenting, Kelly finally gave Taylor a much needed and long overdue time out, which ended up costing them the race. Well that along with a comically long shopping trip. By hey, a healthy relationship with your child is worth a lot more than the chance to win a million bucks, said no sane person ever. And last but not least, we saw the formation of a new alliance, but the question still remains, will it turn out to be more than just an alliance? Your guess is as good as mine, but the difference is that mine matters more because I'm on TV, and I'm getting paid for it so the rest of you are gonna have to find out right here and right now on the next installment of… the Ridonculous Race!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
One intro later…
"Yep, here we are again." once the intro had come to an end, Don started off the new episode in front of the Chill Zone from the day before "Now the time has come for our 12 remaining teams to say bye bye to Dubai, it's funny because it rhymes, and since the Sisters were the winning team from yesterday, that means they get to be the first ones to leave. Now let's get this race started."
"We're way ahead of you Don." sure enough, Emma was quick to push the button on the Don Box and pull out the tip, which she promptly read out loud "It says here that we have to find our next tip located at the world famous Birds Nest Stadium. Huh, you know I don't think I've ever heard of that."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"The world famous Birds Nest Stadium can actually be found in our next location, which just so happens to be Beijing China, home to over 25 million people, and the most ironic part of that is that we're not going to be seeing any of them, aside from a vendor or two and a few random bypassers here and there. Anyway, the first 8 teams grab their travel tips, taxi rides to the local airport, and subsequently their tickets, which allows them to get seats on the first flight heading for Beijing. That means the remaining four teams stuck on the second flight have a full hour extra that they can use to talk about their strategies for the upcoming leg of the race. Or do other things. Case and point…"
Carrie let out a wistful sigh as she watched Devil sleep in the seat next to her, then turned her attention towards the nearby camera "Getting the chance to watch Devin sleep like this is so awesome, sometimes he mumbles the the sweetest things in his slep."
"Zzz… Rainbow zebras took my wallet… Get your stinking hooves off of that you damn dirty horse…" Devin turned over and started snoring.
"Well… I did say sometimes."
"Hey guys." this was when Rock made his way up the aisle to where they were sitting, and his eyes landed on a bag of peanuts that Devin had tucked under his arm "Oh hey Carrie, since it looks like Devin is gonna be out for awhile, I gotta go ahead and ask: Are you gonna make a move on that or what?"
"Wait what? Oh you mean Devin? Well the thing is that he and I are just friends."
"I know but thing about the opportunity, it ain't gonna last forever." he reached over toward the bag of peanuts, which went unnoticed as he found himself being grabbed by the arm before he was able to grasp it.
"You see there it is, that right there is exactly what I keep thinking to myself! The whole reason why I entered this race with him to begin with was becuase I wanted to show Devil that the two of us have a real connection, something really special that most people search for their whole lives but never find, like what my sister has with her boyfriend. Do you understand what it is that I'm trying to say?"
"Yeah I get it but…"
"But what?" Carrie followed his gaze to the bag of peanuts, and her expression dulled "You just wanted to get his bag of peanuts didn't you?"
"I didn't get to eat anything before we left the race and the only snack I have is something that I'm saving for Spud later on."
"...Fine, you can have them." she handed him the bag of peanuts and let out a sigh "Thanks for at least pretending to listen."
"No I was really listening, and I can tell this is really eating away at you."
"Now I can't stop kicking myself for not just telling him how much I love him back when we were in Hawaii. I can't help but feel like my chance of being with him is never really going to come." she wiped away a few tears "But when I force myself to face the reality of this whole situation, I realize that I would rather let him have a life with Shelly than not have him in my life at all."
"That's pretty hardcore. But hey don't forget that old saying, never say never and all that good stuff right? Just think about that." Rock patted Carrie on the shoulder and walked back over to his seat, taking the bag of peanuts with him.
"I guess, but…" Carrie breathed a sigh as she turned towards the camera "Honestly, never saying never keeps getting harder with every passing day…"
"Holy sweet son of a-" Devin suddenly snapped awake and bolted upright, and then he glanced over at Carrie "Oh thank god you're alright."
"Yeah I'm fine, are you okay?"
"Yeah yeah, it's just that I had this crazy dream that the two of us lived in this tree house that ended up getting set on fire and-"
"Wait back up a second, you said it was just the two of us living together?"
"Well if we're gonna be completely honest, I was a tiger with three heads and you were a monkey in a tuxedo, but it was still you so it counts right? Kind of weird, but I guess that's just how dreams are." and then he promptly fell back asleep.
"We… We actually lived together!" and then Carrie let out a massive fangirl-adjacent squeal that was loud enough to shake the entire plane.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, in another part of the plane…
"Okay good news, Carrie gave up some free peanuts." Rock made his way back over to his seat with the bag of peanuts in hand and quickly got Spud's attention "Anyway listen man, we gotta talk about our strategy."
"What about it?" Spud shot him a dull stare.
"I know the strategy we agreed on going with slow and steady as our strategy, but-"
"Didn't you say that our strategy was to party on?"
"Wrong! I mean we need a new strategy anyway, we've only gotten in the top three like once or twice, and the rest of the time we're barely making the top ten so-"
"How about we try partying on even harder?"
"Spud focus man, we've gotta go faster, and I'm talking way faster like the dudes out of that one Hot Wheels cartoon with the robots and the furries!"
"You want us to go faster? Okay hang on, I'm gonna go tell the pilot." and so he rushed out of his seat and towards the cockpit.
"Spud wait hold on, I didn't mean- Aw crapbaskets." Rock let out a groan of frustration as he slumped into his seat and glanced over at the camera "I'm starting to think there's such a thing as being too easygoing. I gotta find some kind of way that I can use to motivate the guy, or we're totally gonna be (bleep)!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, in another part of the plane…
"Well in all honesty, we could be doing better right now." Dwayne gave a shrug as he glanced over at the camera "We could've gotten on the first plane like the others, but a certain someone had to use the bathroom at the airport, and that someone hasn't been eating enough of his veggies so that someone had a fair amount of trouble with-"
"Stop making it sound like it was me!" Junior was quick to snap at him "We both know that it was you!"
"Uh… I have no comment on the matter."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"The first flight carrying the first seven teams has landed in Beijing, and now those teams are in the process of being shuttled over to their next destination."
"Oh yeah, this is gonna be fun." Kitty glanced back at where Owen and Noah were stationed in the seats behind her and Emma "So anyway, we wanted to thank you guys again for letting us take the win yesterday."
"Yeah sure, it was no problem." Owen was quick to wave that off "We're in an alliance right, it's only fair."
"Yeah well, don't expect either of us to return the favor or anything." Emma told him, her tone increasingly flat "It doesn't matter if we do have an alliance, keep in mind that we're still in the middle of a race."
"Uh… okay then." Owen leaned back in his seat, then glanced over at Noah "Yeah little buddy, she's definitely your type."
"Oh good, so you see it too." Noah gave a smirk "Becuase yeah, she's definitely awesome all around."
"I figured you'd say that. You know what I'm thinking of now?"
"If it involves singing I will not hesitate to nurple you until they turn purple."
"...You know what, I'm gonna shut up now."
"Probably for the best, at least for now." Noah idly patted Owen on the arm "But speaking in all seriousness, you do have a job to do during all of this. I swore that I wouldn't let myself become as much of a simp as Cody, and you gotta make sure of that."
"No worries little buddy, I swear on my ability to devour an entire mountain of pancakes, I won't let you down."
"Good, because I'm gonna be holding you to that."
What the two of them didn't notice was that Kitty was listening to the two of them from her own seat in front of them "Owen devouring a mountain of pancakes? Now I totally want to see that at some point."
"Yeah, until you actually do and it makes you wanna vomit." Emma commented dryly.
"Either way, you like him don't you?"
"You mean Owen? Of course not, he's a ball of noxious fumes and he's married."
"I didn't mean him, I was talking about Noah."
"I sure as hell don't like him either."
"Why, because you think he's weird looking?"
"He's not weird looking, he's totally hot."
"So what then, is it because you think he's boring?"
"Noah is NOT boring in any way, shape or form! He has an amazing and twisted sense of humor, he's got a fun streak of sarcasm and snark that goes hand in hand with this cool and moody exterior he's got going on, and his butt is like this pair of two perfect apples that are suspended in mid air!" Emma was met with a chuckle from Kitty, and that was enough for the realization to leave her horrified "Oh no… I like him…"
"You do know the rest of us can hear you over there right?" Leshawna pointed out dryly from where she and Trent were sitting across from them.
"Uh… sorry." it was then that they were nearly jerked out of their seats when the bus screeched to a halt outside the Birds Nest Stadium, ramming into the Don Box in the process "Okay what the (bleep) was that?!"
"If I had to guess, I think that means we're here." Trent was the first one to bolt out of the bus, with the others following close behind him and found the Don Box lying on the sidewalk, dented and spewing out tips "Am I the only one who's kind of concerned about that?"
"Pretty much yeah!" Kitty bolted past him and picked up one of the tips being spewed out, which she and Emma promptly read out loud "It's an All In challenge, it says that we have to fly over the Birds Nest Stadium and tandem jump through the donut hole, and do it successfully in order to receive our next travel tip." she looked over to see Trent backing away "What the heck are you doing?"
"Bracing myself for what's about to happen because you just said donuts."
"What do you-"
"DONUTS!" Owen suddenly popped out of nowhere screaming for joy at the top of his lungs "I gotta see the donuts!"
"...Oh. That's what you meant. I've watched every season of Total Drama up until now, I feel ashamed of myself that I didn't see that coming."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
One scene transition/plane ride later…
"Hold on, what?!" Owen poked his head out of the door of the plane, and he was less than impressed by what he saw on the ground below "So you mean that's the donut they were talking about? Oh come on, that's just wrong on so many levels! I mean seriously, when the heck are we gonna get to have another eating challenge? I'm so hungry I feel like I could eat a whole house, like one made of donuts, complete with shingles made of chocolate and a fence made entirely of white pretzels."
"And just like that we've lost him for at least an hour." Noah rolled his eyes as he strapped both himself and Owen into a parachute, then looked over at where Emma and Kitty were strapped into their own parachute "So am I supposed to make some really lame joke about how they've got our backs or something?"
"I wouldn't if I were you, that's just terrible." Emma glanced back towards Kitty and lowered her voice so that no one else (at least not Noah) was able to hear "Though to be honest, I bet that he would make it really adorable."
"Well it could've been worse, I could be kissing a rock because of some twisted and superstitious paranoia." Noah jerked a thumb back to the one he was talking about.
"Step aside peasants, I need some room for this!" Josee motioned for the other teams to step away from her as she kissed her Hawaiian lava rock "I need to have all of the luck that this Hawaiian lava rock is able to give me."
"You seem rather superstitious of this." Cameron shot a raised eyebrow in her direction.
"How could I not be? Yesterday we came in fourth, fourth of all places!" she started rubbing the rock against Jacques "We shouldn't be allowing ourselves to get down in the dirt like all of the other losers, we should be towering above all of them like the goddesses we are!" then she finally stopped rubbing and left Jacques with various bruises all over his face "Wait a second, did that sound too egotistical?"
"I would say… there is a high probability that you could have been worse."
"You serious about that?" Lightning shot him a raised eyebrow.
"No not really, I was simply trying to be polite. I do find the obsession with superstitions such as those to be rather peculiar."
"Well if I had to guess, it's probably more for peace of mind than anything else. Take my Pops for example, he's got this set of lucky underwear to help his favorite team win. I don't really get it, but if it makes him happy then I say go for it." this was followed by a loud buzzer sounding and the door to the plane opening.
"I believe that buzzer is prompting us to jump now. Do you believe we're ready?"
"Hey come on, how hard could it be?" Lightning patted Cameron on the shoulder, and then the two of them jumped out, with several other teams following their lead, all of them screaming all the way down.
"They say that it can't be that hard, and then they end up going splat on the ground in an overly comedic fashion." Noah shared a dry look with Emma, and then they (along with Owen and Kitty) jumped out of the plane, screaming in terror all the while, until they ended up reaching the ground, with Noah & Owen landing on a rickshaw and Emma & Kitty crashing into a gong.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the antagonists of the season…
"There it is, go over there!" still in mid-air, Josee tried to steer herself and Jacques over in the direction of the donut hole in the stadium "What are you deaf, I'm trying to get you to steer over to the (bleep) donut hole!"
"Of course I know that Josee, but it's not-" Jacques didn't get a chance to finish before he ended up being slammed into a nearby billboard with his head sticking out… through the picture of a donkey's ass "Ow…"
"Well this is you we're talking about, you're always trailing behind. But still, you always have been and always will be an ASSET to the team."
"Thank you. Wait a second."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the new alliance…
"Okay, so here's what I'm thinking." once they dug themselves out of the wreckage, Emma and the others started making their way back to the challenge site to redo it "This time around, we go in concentrating less on screaming and more on steering."
"I'll see what I can do, but I won't guarantee anything." Kitty told her flatly.
"Of course you won't. Anyway let's go, I can see the next bus pulling up."
Sure enough, it was at this moment that the bus pulled up to the scene carrying the last five teams on board, with Rock trailing behind the rest of them for one big reason "Hey Spud come on big guy, we really gotta get moving! You want a Choco Onkie?" he pulled out a box and started shaking it.
"CHOCO ONKIE!" Spud suddenly bolted out of the bus door and started sniffing around for the box of treats in question.
"Oh yeah, this is gonna work like a charm." Rock glanced over at the camera as he pulled one of the treats out of the box "So I had to come up with a new strategy for race. Spud goes totally nuts over these choko onkies so much to the point where he'd do just about anything to get one of these things in his mouth."
"Chocolate-covered pork-rindy goodness…"
"Yep, so I cleaned out the vending machine at the airport and got my hands on the biggest box they could give me, and this will help him to pick up the pace. No way in hell we're gonna be coming in last today!" Rock was met with Spud chomping down on his hand that was holding the treat, causing him to scream in pain.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, inside the stadium…
"There it is, I see the Don Box!" after landing through the donut hole, Bridgette and Geoff were the first team that managed to reach the Don Box, in which they pulled out a tip "It looks like we get to do another All In challenge."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Like Bridgette said, this is another All In challenge, except this one has a sizable twist to make it more interesting. In order to receive their next travel tip from a local vendor, the only Chinese person out of a solid 25 million people in Beijing that we're actually supposed to be seeing while we're here, one team will have to assemble and then deep fry a skewer of Beijing street food, and then their partner is going to have to eat it. The big question is, who is going to scarf it down and who is going to barf it back up about ten seconds later? Find out when we come back, right here on… the Ridonculous Race!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Well now that the commercial break is over, which was actually timed pretty well now that I think about it, the first group of teams have arrived at the sight of the second challenge, but some of them are finding it harder to get started than others."
"Hey what's good today dude, are the crickets fresh and stuff?" Geoff took the chance to try and make awkward small talk with the vendor, only to be met with her holding out a live cricket to him, and so he looked away nervously, only to see Bridgette looking green in the face "Hey babe you okay?"
"They want us to… to eat live animals and…" Bridgette shuddered at the though, only to find herself being pulled into a tight hug.
"Hey take it easy babe, don't do anything you're not cool with doing. I'd scarf down a hundred of those little critters if it meant you didn't have you." Geoff gave her a reassuring smile, which earned him a peck on the cheek.
"Thanks babe."
"You might wanna brace yourselves guys, we might have another problem." Trent jerked a thumb over to where Crimson and Ennui were releasing the bats held in a nearby crate "So what exactly are you guys doing?"
"I'm doing what needs to be done." Crimson told him flatly.
"As in?"
"Bats are without a doubt the most beautiful creatures in this world, of course I had no other choice but to set them free."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, in the stadium…
"Yes here we are, at last we stick the landing!" Jacques and Josee finally glided inside the donut hole and landed in the stadium, only to be met with a sickening crunching noise that caused the former to scream in agony "My ankle!"
"(Insert massive stream of curses)!" Josee shot a dark scowl at Jacques as she unstrapped herself from the parachute and looked over at the camera "Seriously, I can't for the life of me figure out what it is that's making Jacques so clumsy today. No I'm not giving him any sympathy over his ankle or anything, that's only going to encourage him." and then she got tired of listening to his cries of pan and smacked him upside the head "Get the hell over yourself already, do I need to remind you that our fans are watching right now? Don't forget that this is a competition, so be a man and EAT THE PAIN! And make sure to smile while you do it." and so the two of them rushed off, both of them smiling in their typical creepy way as they made their way out of the stadium.
"Yes, we finally made it!" Carrie and Devin were the next team to glide through the donut hole and land in the stadium, though only the former was actually enjoying it "That was incredible, I swear I've never felt anything like that before!"
"Yeah… cool…" Devin on the other hand let the fear take over as he fell to the ground with a loud thud.
"You okay homie?"
"Yeah yeah I'm fine, it's just…" Devin let out a sigh as he allowed Carrie to pull him back to his feet "I think we've established by now that I'm not the best with heights, or falling from them for that matter, and we just had to deal with both of those things, so I don't think my fears are really that unreasonable." he shook off his fear and discomfort and gave a smile "I'm just glad that I had you there to help me get through it. Shelley would've totally bailed on me. That's part of the reason why I said what I did back in Hawaii."
"Oh. Well thanks Devin. Hey what's that?"
"What's what?" Devin glanced in some random direction that Carrie was pointing, which gave her the chance to pump her fists in triumph with a massive grin on her face.
"Oh, well I guess it was nothing."
"Huh. Okay if you say so homie." and so the two of them made their way towards the Don Box, grabbed a tip and subsequently rushed off just as the next two teams dropped into the stadium.
"So why do you wanna be a lawyer, do you wanna have your own firm or be like one of those big corporate sellouts that-" Noah didn't get a chance to finish his sentence before he hit the ground, with Owen crushing him underneath his… let's call it girth "Ow…"
"Sorry little buddy!" Owen picked up Noah by the back of the shirt as Emma and Kitty went over to grab a tip "I swear I wasn't trying to interrupt you or anything, me landing on you the way that I did was just an accident!"
"It was probably for the best though, if I'm gonna be totally honest I didn't have a damn clue where I was gonna go with that. Either way, right now I'm just trying to get to know her before I actually try and ask her out."
"I gotcha little buddy, so what can I do to help?"
"You're already doing it, don't forget that you're basically on simp patrol to keep me from being a bigger (bleep) up with this stuff than Cody was."
"He wasn't that bad."
"Yes he was."
"Well I mean yeah he was, but to be fair he got with Gwen in the end."
"...Yeah that's true, but you get my point."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"The first group of teams has reached the sight of the second challenge and are either getting started or are about to, but it's pretty slow going for everyone involved. Mainly because those that aren't trying not to vomit are trying not to get eaten."
"Okay here we are, now we just gotta-" Devin and Carrie arrived at the vendor stand, and the former cut himself short when he saw Father & Son getting chased by bats, the Stepbrothers puking on each other, and the Adversity Twins being attacked by the contents of the box in front of them "Oh… okay wow."
"Uh, I'm not really sure that I'm gonna be able to-" Carrie felt her cheeks bulge, which earned a comforting hand on her shoulder from Devin.
"Take it easy homie, it's gonna be alright. I'll do the hard part and do the eating stuff, you just go ahead and skewer up a few worms and-" he didn't get to finish his sentence before Carrie ran over to a nearby bush and started puking violently "What, you mean I'm not even allowed to say worms?" and that made her puke again "Well ask a stupid question."
"Well if it helps, you ain't the only one with that problem." Leshawna nonchalantly jerked a thumb over to where Trent was puking into a bucket "We all learned the hard way back on Camp Wawanakwa that he's got a pretty weak stomach."
"With Carrie it's more geared towards worms to be more specific." he kept his voice low enough that Carrie wasn't able to hear it "Back when were still little, her sister dared her to eat a worm once, and when she did it she was left puking like that for almost a week."
"Devin…" Carrie slowly looked up from her bush, her face pale and sickly "Were you talking about… worms?"
"Um… yes?" he was met with the sound of more puking "Yeah okay, I walked into that one."
"No kidding." Leshawna glanced over at where Bridgette was blindfolding herself "Girl you really did something like that?"
"In my defense, I'm not particularly proud of that." Bridette finished tying the blindfold over her eyes and let Geoff turn her towards the box in front of her "Nor am I proud of what it is I'm about to do here."
"I figured you wouldn't be. So why the blindfold?"
"I can't handle the eating part of this, so as much as I hate it, that leaves me with the skewering and cooking part… which means skewering these creatures while they're, you know… still alive and all."
"Uh huh. Well whatever works for you girlfriend." Leshawna simply patted Bridgette on the shoulder, then went over to pick Trent up out of the bush "Alright come on skinny white boy, we have a challenge to get done. Just remember that this ain't like that whole thing with the Brunch of Disgustingness, they ain't doing this to torture us. It's just a customs thing, even if it is nasty as all hell."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with another team…
"Alright alright, come on you little rascal!" Dwayne was in the middle of trying to pick up a few scorpions with a small stick, to no avail "Dang it, would you just- Okay hold on, maybe if I can just reach in and…" he moved to reach for a scorpion with his bare hand, only to be stopped on the spot by the vendor grabbing him by the hand "Hey you don't have to worry about me with these kinds of things, I can be as fast as a panther. Just watch and learn, all I have to do now is reach in and-" he reached back in and started screaming in agony as the scorpion stung him, which left Junior horrified and the vendor smirking in satisfaction. That quickly came to a head when he pulled out his hand and revealed multiple scorpions latching onto it, which promptly flung all over the place by shaking them off.
"Okay, just skewer them nice and-" Jacques was one of the unfortunate victims that ended up having a scorpion latched onto his face, leaving him screaming in terror "Kill it Josee, kill the beast before it can unleash its terrible sting!"
"I'll do it if you hold still and stop freaking screaming!" Josee started repeatedly punching him in the face, though the ironic part of it is that she missed the scorpion every single time.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, in the stadium…
"Come on, come on…" Rock pressed down on the button on the Don Box and quickly pulled out a tip "Okay, so far so good."
"Alright we did not, oink me in my oink hole already!" Spud reached for the box of Choco Onkies, only for Rock to pull it away "Hey!"
"Forget it man, you're not getting any until the two of us get out of last place!"
"Come on dude, I haven't had one in forever…"
"You mean since you bit my hand?" Rock shot a dry look at Spud, but then let out a sigh as he relented, supposedly at least "Alright fine, go get it!" he moved his arm like he was pretending to throw a treat, which prompted Spun to run after it "There it is boy, go get the treat!"
"I'll get it, I swear I'm gonna get it!"
"Come on big guy, you gotta go faster!" Rock quickly took off running after Spud, though as he did he glanced at the camera "According to his mom, Spud is a light eater. As in when the lights turn on, he starts eating. Seriously, you guys saw the way he chomped down on my hand. If it wasn't for this one pressure point thing I learned from a Disney show awhile back, he probably would've chomped it clean off."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the second challenge…
"Just give me a moment and it will be ready." Cameron stuck the skewer of street food into the fryer, then glanced over at Lightning "I am rather surprised that you volunteered so readily to consume these… local delicacies."
"You ever see what some of the guys on the team will do for a dare?" Lightning shot him a dull look "Stuff like this is nothing. Besides, chances are it's still gonna taste better than the protein powder I used to carry around with me."
"I… see. Well if you're certain."
"You already stuck the skewer in too, it's too late now. Besides, even if you did take it out there's a chance that it'd probably just jump out and sting you in the face or something."
"I don't believe that's physically possible."
"You said the same thing about goats being able to breath fire and lay eggs."
"...That is a fair point." Cameron then looked in another direction and blinked a few times "Then again, that claim about the scorpions may have actually had some merit after all."
"How so?" Lightning glanced over to see Dwayne stumbling around with giant red swelling on his hand "Oh. That. Hey you okay dude?"
"Oh yeah sure, of course I am Mr President… didn't you?" and then Dwayne promptly fell to the ground in a heap.
"Uh… he's not gonna die or anything is he?"
"Lucky for us, no." Junior let out a sigh "He just got stung by like a dozen of the scorpions in one of the boxes. I talked to the medics and they say the poison is gonna wear off eventually, but the problem is that we can't just wait around or we're gonna come in last and probably get cut from the race."
"So what are you going to do?" asked Cameron.
"The only thing I can do. I'm gonna have to take charge of our team. Again."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the antagonists…
"Okay, I think I finally got it." Josee grabbed hold of the scorpion on Jacque's face and threw it away in an overly dramatic fashion "So how are you feeling Jacques?"
"I can't feel anything on my face." Jacques was immediately met with the skewer of street food being stuffed into his mouth, and being forced to swallow it "I still can't feel it… Okay now I'm feeling a numbness, and it's a burning sensation and-"
"But it's down you throat so that's good enough for me, we're done and that means we're in first place where we belong!" she was promptly handed the travel tip by the vendor "It says that it's another Botch or Watch challenge."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"In this Botch or Watch challenge, whichever member of each team didn't go diving for wedding rings at the bay in Hawaii will have to pull their teammate by rickshaw all the way along the provided path to the magnificent monument that is the Great Wall of China using nothing but a rudimentary map, which will be provided along with the rickshaw. Once they arrive at the wall, it will be a footrace to where the Chill Zone has been hidden somewhere along the wall, and then check in. But they'll have to hurry because as always, the last team to arrive may be cut from the race entirely."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the challenge sight…
"Au revoir peasants!" Josee grabbed hold of the rickshaw, with Jacques sitting in the back of it, and the two of them took off towards the Great Wall of China, with the Performers and then the Surfers following close behind them.
"Okay, that's definitely not a good sign." Devin took a quick glance over at Carrie "Three of the other teams have moved on homie, if we don't wanna risk coming in last again then you gotta start skewering. If you're still squeamish about the worms then just save them for last and get the rest of the-" he didn't get a chance to finish before Carrie started puking into a bucket "Yeah, I probably should've seen that coming."
"Alright we're here, now let's get started." this was when Emma and Kitty rushed onto the scene, with Owen and Noah following close behind them "And remember, I'm doing the prep work and you're doing the eating."
"Is that a question?" Kitty shot him a raised eyebrow.
"What do you think?"
"Huh. Well in that case…" Noah promptly rounded on Owen "I do the prep work and you do the eating, if anyone thought this was gonna go any other way then they've clearly never heard of you or seen Total Drama, the latter of which I personally give them points for." and so he rushed over to the box of creatures to form his skewer.
"Wow." Emma shot him a look as she finished her own skewer.
"Like I said, anyone who's ever seen Total Drama would know that Owen's the guy to go to when it comes to eating challenges. Or eating of any kind really."
"Fine but seriously, could you be any bigger of a jerk to your partner? You don't have to act like such a control freak you know." and so she promptly walked away.
"...Okay it's official, I don't have a (bleep) clue what the (bleep) I'm doing."
"I kind of figured little buddy." Owen patted him on the shoulder "Let me guess, you figured that if you act just like Emma then she'd be impressed and think that the two of you make a great couple?"
"Uh… maybe? Seriously, how the hell do people do this kind of thing?"
"Now do you want me to help with more than just simp-patrol?"
"How exactly would you be able to do something like that?"
"Come on now little buddy, don't forget that between the two of us, I'm the one that's actually married."
"You and Izzy eloped in Vegas, and it was her idea because she won a card game with a dude that was dressed like a chupacabra."
"So what, it still counts. Anyway, the experience that I've got with girls has taught me the very important lesson that includes a very simple trick that should know."
"You gonna stop pussy-footing around and tell me what it is?"
"It's simple: You have to be subtle."
"...You'd better be right about this, I wasn't kidding about my nurple threat." Noah promptly grabbed a stick, formed a skewer and made his way over to the fryers, where he found Emma in the middle of frying hers "So… you come here often?"
"It's China and I'm from Canada. What do you think?" Emma shot him a dry look and promptly walked away once her skewer was done frying.
"...I'm totally gonna blame Owen for this."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with another team…
"There, that's all of the gross bugs and stuff down the hatch." Lightning finished his skewer and threw away the stick, only to look into a nearby pan and see his reflection, revealing the… things that were stuck in his teeth "Eesh, that just ain't right. Any chance you got some floss anywhere on you?"
"Oh sure, it's right here." Cameron held out a small box of dental floss, earring a surprised look from Lightning in the process "What?"
"You just carry around a box of floss on you all the time?"
"To be fair you carry around breath mints on your person, and you're not the only member of our team that believes in proper dental hygiene."
"...Fair enough. So I'm gonna do the whole flossing thing for a minute, you mind grabbing the tip for us?"
"You can count on me." Cameron looked over as Lightning started flossing, then read the tip as he received it from the vendor "It's another Botch or Watch, one based on physical prowess, so it's definitely fortunate that you have to be the one to do this one."
"Then let's get moving, we've got ourselves a race to win!" so Lightning slung Cameron over his shoulder and took off running.
"Oh no, now the others are getting even further ahead, I'd better-" Carrie looked down into the box in front of her and saw a snake cooped up in the shape of a heart "Aw, hey Devin take a look at this, it must be a sign of some kind."
"Oh really, a sign of what?" Devin looked down into the box, only for the snake to burst out and latch onto his face, causing him to scream in comical agony while Carrie turned pale and her cheeks began to bulge.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, on another end…
"Holy crap, that is so cool…" Spud was in the middle of trying to pick up a starfish off the ground using his skewer, though he was quickly letting himself get distracted "Seriously dude, if I could have as many arms as the little guy down there, then I'd be able to play drums and guitar and base all at the same time. Do you have any idea how awesome that would be?"
"Yeah it would, but you gotta focus dude!" Rock let out a groan "You seriously gotta hurry the hell up already, we're still in last place!"
"Alright I get it, but I think a Choco Onkie would really help me to pick up the pace if you know what I mean."
"Oh what, you mean one of these bad boys?" Rock pulled an onkie out of the box and held it up in front of Spud "Yeah these things are good, I sure hope there's gonna be one of these left for you to snack on when we finally get the hell out of last place!"
"Wait what, no no no man, you can't just-"
"I can't just what? You mean do this?" Rock crumbled the onkie up in his hand and left the crumbs to fall to the ground, prompting Spud to scream in terror, then drop to the ground and try to slurp up the crumbs "Yeah you know dude, you've got some serious issues when it comes to those things."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the (temporary) frontrunners…
"There it is!" from his place sitting in the rickshaw, Jacques pointed to where the Great Wall of China could be seen on the path in front of them "I can see the wall from here, just a little bit further now!"
"At long last, the gold we're entitled to is finally within our grasp!" Josee tried to make a mad dash towards the wall, only to end up slipping on a banana peel lying randomly in the middle of the path, leaving her to hit the ground with a thud and leaving Jacques to be flung onto the wall with a loud crash.
"Sacre bleu, now it's my other ankle!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the vendor stand…
"Okay, it's done to the point where it's edible, and that's enough for the big guy." Noah yanked his skewer out of the fryer, then promptly shoved it into Owen's mouth without bothering to look at him "There now down it already, we're basically on a schedule here."
"Seriously?" Emma shot a disapproving look in his direction "You realize you're basically about to make him choke on that."
"You really haven't learned anything about Owen during this race have you?"
"What the heck is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that any second now-"
"DONE!" Owen held up his skewer in triumph, then glanced over at vendor as he was handed the travel tip "Hey can I get another couple of those for the road?"
"...That. That's what that means."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, on the path to the wall…
"Come on big guy, you can do this." Lightning took a breath as he continued running down the path towards the wall, pulling Cameron and the rickshaw behind him, though he quickly felt his cheeks bulge "Oh boy…"
"Are you alright up there?" asked Cameron.
"Some of those things on the stick are kind of starting to crawl their way back up."
"Do you need to stop for a moment?"
"No no, I can manage until we get to the wall and- Hold that though." he poked his head over to the side and started hurling "Nevermind."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the wall…
"Okay here it is, we're at the wall." by this point, Trent and Leshawna had made their way onto the wall itself, with Geoff and Bridgette following close behind them "Huh… quick question, is there any chance that the rest of you have any idea which way we're supposed to go?"
"Uh…" Geoff and Bridgette shared a look, and then they looked back at Trent "To be totally honest, not really no."
"Just checking."
"You think maybe we should split up?" asked Bridgette "One team goes on the right path and the other team goes on the left, and we just kind of go from there."
"Not like we really have any other options right now. I guess you guys go down the right path, and me and Leshawna go down the left."
"Anything works for me." Leshawna gave a shrug as she and Trent took off running down the right path "I don't really care which way we go as long as we get to the Chill Zone before those Ice Dancers so they can suck on the flat end of my (bleep)."
"...Yeah. You might wanna pull it back a little bit."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the antagonists…
"Come on, come on…" Jacques made their way along the wall in search of the Chill Zone, only to find themselves running into a problem "I have no idea which way we're supposed to go to find the Chill Zone."
"The hell with this stupid map, it's completely useless!" Josee threw away the map in her ever growing frustration , then kissed her supposedly lucky lava rock "Now there's only one thing that we can do to secure our victory, we have to let luck decide!" she looked up to see the map blow away in a certain direction "That's a good enough sign for me, now let's follow it to the Chill Zone and to first place!" and so they took off running in that direction… though neither of them noticed the map suddenly blow in the opposite direction.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
"Three more teams have completed the eating challenge and are now moving onto the Botch or Watch race to the wall with the rickshaws, leaving our last two skewered up teams that are really struggling, for one reason or another."
"Okay that's enough of that, you barf half a dozen times and I think that's the point where I call it." so Devin snatched the skewer out of Carrie's hand and moved towards a nearby box "I think it's time for me to get started on the cooking."
"But that means that…" Carrie felt her cheeks bulge again "I can't do the eating part…"
"Have some faith in me homie, I've got this one covered. Just pretend it's chicken and then scarf the whole thing down."
"But it's not chicken, it's definitely not chicken."
"It doesn't matter if it really is chicken or not, you just have to say it like you mean it as many times as it takes for you to make your mind believe."
"Well if you're sure… it's chicken, it's chicken, it's chicken…"
"There you go homie, keep saying it." Devin popped the skewer into the fryer, during which he grabbed a nearby cloth and handed it to Carrie "And just to be safe, do what Bridgette did and tie that thing over your eyes so you don't have to look at any of it."
"Right!" Carrie tied the cloth over her eyes to blindfold herself, and once she was handed the skewer she started going to town on it "It's chicken… it's chicken…"
"There you go homie, now taste that chicken. You might wanna taste it faster though, it looks like the Rockers are catching up."
"I got the stuff!" this was when Spud came rushing up to Rock with the skewer in hand "Now can I get me a Choco Oinkie?"
"Not a chance man, we're still in last place now I gotta eat." Rock snatched the skewer away and shuddered as he looked at the contents, then glanced over at the camera "You know there was this one time awhile back where I ate some deep fried tofu, and the stuff made me vomit for like an hour, but I just know this thing is gonna leave me twitching like I've got rabies. Yeah, there are some things in life that are just wrong on so many levels."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with half of the new alliance…
"I still don't see what the problem is." Kitty sat in the back of the rickshaw as Emma continued pulling her along the path to the wall "You know that you like him and I know that you like him, I wouldn't be surprised if everyone else knows that you like him by this point. I still don't see what reason you could possibly have for shooting him down."
"It's not about shooting him down, I'm waiting until after the race before I even think about that sort of thing." Emma told her "Don't forget that we're in the middle of a competition, and when it comes to that sort of things relationships just screw everything up. Doing that sort of thing when we're not even halfway through the race would just ruin everything."
"Either that or they'd make it even better. You never know."
"Exactly, I never know, and that right there is the big problem, there's no way to predict how it could turn out. I didn't come here to screw around with a guy and his fat partner-"
"Owen is an icon and anyone who thinks poorly of him doesn't have a soul, any Total Drama fan who actually has a soul would understand that."
"Whatever, the fact is that I'm not here to start a relationship, I'm here to win a race and get the million dollars, and that's all I'm focusing on right now." but this quickly came to a halt when their rickshaw hit a rock in the road, causing a wheel to fall off of their rickshaw and leaving them to hit the ground with a loud crash, leaving Owen and Noah to run over their wheel and destroy it in the process "(Bleep)! Well that's just great, now we're gonna come in last and probably get cut from the race. What the hell are we supposed to do without the wheel?"
"Hey guys!" Owen suddenly screeched to a stop next to them "What's up alliance buddies, you two need a hand?"
"That depends, either of you have an extra wheel stowed away somewhere?"
"No but you have yours truly, and there's only one of me." Noah hopped out of the rickshaw and made his way over to Emma, though he cringed as he did so "Yeah not gonna lie, that sounded a lot less cringy and painful in my head. How could this get any more awkward?" he cringed even harder "That part wasn't supposed to be out loud."
"Easy little buddy." Owen slapped a hand over his mouth, receiving a muffled "thank you" in response "Yeah, I'm the ultimate wingman. Anyway I think I have an idea, but you guys might not be crazy about it. Especially you little buddy." he was met with a few raised eyebrows from the others.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the wall…
"Alright, here we are." Lightning rushed onto the Great Wall of China, with Cameron being carried on his shoulders "Which way are we gonna go?"
"Let me see…" Cameron frowned in thought for a moment, then looked around "I believe that the best choice would be for us to go to the right."
"You're the brains and I'm the brawn, now let's live up to our team name and show them what we've got!" so Lightning tightened his grip on Cameron and took off running down the path along the wall."
"Agreed, the time has come for us to full demonstrate our prowess."
"You got that right, Brains & Brawn for the win! I dunno, I still like the Ultimate Duo as the name for our team."
"I understand where you're coming from, but it seemed like a bit much to me."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the new alliance…
"Okay, here we go." Emma was left panting slightly as she and Owen continued on side by side, their rickshaws trailing close behind them "Hey be honest Noah, this isn't too fast for you or anything is it?"
"No no, it's fine." as it turns out, Noah was holding onto the shaft of Emma and Kitty's rickshaw while still inside of his own "It just burns like hell is all, pretty much everything below my neck actually."
"Doesn't that hurt you, like really bad?" Kitty shot him a raised eyebrow.
"Like I said, everything below my neck, not to mention that my hand itself is throbbing and I'm about 70% sure that my spine is about to snap in half, but it's still more bearable than the two seasons I spent competing on Total Drama."
"Or the few months that you spent working as an assistant to Chris McLean."
"And here I thought there was nobody else that actually remembered the time I spent working for that sadistic piece of (bleep). Anyway no, it's nothing compared to any of that, and besides your sister is insanely gorgeous. That last part was out loud again wasn't it?"
"Yes, yes it was."
"Aw crapbaskets." that left Emma blushing a shade of pink.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone…
"Well we finally got to see it for ourselves." Don was quick to greet the first team when they arrived at the Chill Zone "It looks like a healthy balance of brains and brawn does beat out all of the competition. Congratulations to you both Cameron and Lightning, the two of you have arrived in first place!"
"Oh hell yeah, now that's what I call a sha-bam!" Lightning set Cameron down on the ground and quickly caught him in a powerful high five… which ended up being more than enough force to smack Cameron straight to the ground "Uh… sorry."
"I may be fragile, but I also find that I'm quite durable." Cameron quickly picked himself up and returned Lightning's high five with one of his own, which barely tapped his hand "In terms of my physical capability however, I'm evidently still lacking."
"Well that's what I'm here for right?" Lightning caught him in a quick fist bump, and the two of them walked away from the scene.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the alliance…
"Well that could've been worse, at least we're not dead." Emma let out a sigh as she and the others made their way onto the wall, and then she cast a quick glance over at Noah "So how is your hand ding?"
"It's fine." Noah held up his right hand to prove that statement, but then he held up his incredibly swollen left hand "This one on the other hand looks like something that came out of Attack on Titan, minus all of the blood, guts and gore."
"Oh my god, that's horrible."
"For people who can't handle that sort of thing yeah, but the writing is definitely up there for that series, and the music is to die for."
"I'm talking about your hand, now give it here." she placed both of her hands on his swollen one and started gently rubbing it "I have to admit though, what you did for us was… actually really nice. Does this make it feel any better?"
"Actually it's really painful, but kind of in a good way, so don't stop." the two of them locked eyes as both of them started blushing "(Bleep), please tell me that I wasn't stupid enough to say that out loud."
"You didn't say anything." Kitty told him.
"Oh thank the great god above."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the antagonists…
"I can practically smell the gold, victory is within our grasp!" Josee and Jacques continued running along the path down the wall, only to notice the Performers and the Surfers running in their direction "Wait a minute, if they're coming towards us then that means… we're going in the wrong direction! Turn the (bleep) around you stupid (bleep)!" and that prompted the two of them to turn around and continue running.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the rickshaws…
"Oh come on, you've gotta be kidding me." Junior let out a groan as he glanced in the direction of the camera "You mean that my dad has to be the one to pull the rickshaw?"
"Hey come on Santa, it's not gonna be a problem for me." as it turns out, Dwayne was left highly disoriented from his little encounter with the scorpions, not to mention having his pants around his ankles for whatever reason "I'm more than happy to pull your sleigh all through the night and as long as you want me to- Oh my god where my legs, please tell me that you didn't rip them off and feed them to your reindeer? I know that Donner and Blitzen are man eaters!"
"...Yep it's official, we're screwed on so many levels."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the inevitable losers…
"Okay, that oughta be enough to hold it until we get to the wall." Rock finished doing some work on his carriage, only to turn around and find Spud munching on the box of Choco Onkies "Oh for crying out loud dude, please tell me you didn't just down all of the Choco Oinks?"
"Uh… maybe?" Spud gave a shrug.
"Come on man, those were all that I had and I needed them to motivate you!"
"To eat all of them? Well that part definitely worked."
"That's a bad Spud, now what the hell am I gonna do?"
"Here's an idea bro, do you wanna waste this sugar high or ride it like it's that night on stage with the Grateful Dead?!"
"...Oh yeah, that's a good point." Rock gave a grin as he glanced over at the camera "See there was this one time a few years ago that Spud downed a whole box of coffee beans covered in chocolate, and he ended up on such a sugar high that he did over 3,000 consecutive power slides, and it was freaking amazing, wasn't it bro?" he looked over, only to see Spud running away at high speed with the rickshaw, prompting him to take off after him "Hey Spud hold on a sec, it's a Botch or Watch and I'm suppose to be the one that pulls the-"
"CHOCO OINK!"
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone…
"And here they come to fill out the top three." Don was quick to greet the Reality TV Pros and the Sisters when they arrived at the Chill Zone "But you do know that only one team will be able to come in second place."
"Yeah well, that figures." Noah took a step back and gestured for Owen to do the same "You heard the man, ladies first and all that stereotypical crap."
"Yeah no, I don't think so." Emma stopped Kitty from walking onto the carpet as she turned to face Noah "You and the big guy are going first, an alliance should be fair and it's your turn to go ahead of us."
"Uh huh. I like you you know. A lot."
"Just go ahead and get on the carpet before you look like an even dork."
"I second that." Don noted dryly, prompting the Reality TV Pros to step onto the carpet, with the Sisters following close behind "Owen and Noah you're in second place, and Emma and Kitty are in third place."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the last place teams…
"I can see Father & Son up ahead, let's get moving!" Devin tightened his grip on the rickshaw as he started going faster, though a loud moaning noise got his attention "You doing alright back there homie?"
"No… definitely not…" Carrie was still pale and clutching her stomach in pain as she sat in the back of the rickshaw "That was not chicken… that was definitely not chicken…"
"Just hold it in homie, we're not in last place yet so-"
"CHOCO OINKS!" Spud suddenly bolted past the other teams carrying the rickshaw, with Rock desperately clinging onto the back of it.
"...Nevermind then."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone…
"So let me get this straight…" Josee was left foaming at the mouth when she and Jacques had finally arrived that the Chill Zone "You're telling me that we came in fourth? AGAIN?!"
"Yes we've gone over this several times." Don's tone was filled with condescension in a very teasing manner "Fourth always comes after third, the numbers are always sequential."
"In that case you might want to duck any second now." Jacques told him dryly.
"Why would I wanna-" Don was cut off when Josee started throwing another tantrum, and subsequently throwing numerous sharp and heavy objects around "Oh. that's why. So should I get security out here or-"
"No no it's fine, I've learned how to handle this." Jacques ducked underneath the chaos until he made it to Josee and pinched a nerve on her neck, knocking her out cold, and then he dragged her body away.
"Huh. Well moving on from that, we've got more teams incoming." he started counting off the rest of the teams as they arrived, starting with the Performers "Fifth place!"
Then came the Surfers.
"Sixth place!"
The Stepbrothers.
"Seventh place!"
The Goths.
"Eighth place!"
The Adversity Twins.
"Ninth place!" Don watched as the teams that were checked in all went on their way, then took a look out into the distance "That's nine teams down, so that leaves the Best Friends Father & Son, and the Rockers in the bottom three. One of these teams could be heading home."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, with the bottom three teams…
"There's the Chill Zone, I can see it from here! We're totally gonna make it!" Spud prepared to take off running, only to quick run into a problem "Sugar crash… strength fading… going down hard…" and then he hit the ground with a loud thud, allowing the Best Friends and Father & Son to pass him and Rock.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone…
"That's tenth place for the Best Friends, and eleventh place for Father & Son." Don looked on as both teams checked in, then glanced over to see Spud crash onto the Carpet of Completion with a loud thud, with Rock rushing in right after "And then there was one. I'm sorry Rockers, but you guys are the last team to arrive."
"Aw man, and we were so close too." Spud let out a low groan.
"If it makes either of you feel any better, you would've been given a penalty that would knock you both into last place anyway. The race to the wall was a Botch or Watch, and Rock was supposed to be the one to pull the rickshaw."
"Oh, really?"
"Dude I told you that like five times." Rock pointed out dryly.
"Huh. Well I guess that makes me feel a little bit better. Sorry I ended up blowing this one for us dude."
"Nah man, this one is on me too. If I'm gonna try and use treats to train you like a dog, then I can't be surprised when you freak the hell out and trash the kitchen, or try and take a dump in my boots."
"Okay dude, I can tell you for a fact that I'm never gonna do that last one."
"Good enough for me."
"And good enough for the rest of us." Don was quick to cut into their conversation "That's sure to make the race a lot more pleasant, because this was really a non-elimination round! The two of you are still in the race!"
"Aw hell yeah, victory riff!" and then the two of them started rocking out on air guitar.
"...Yeah, not really a victory." Don took the opportunity to sign off "Which team will be the next one to go? There's a pretty fair chance it's the two of them, but there's only one way to find out for certain, and that's to tune in for the next exciting installment of… the Ridonculous Race!"
A/N:
Well here's another chapter done, and brings us into the double digits. There's not really a whole lot to say about this one, aside from bringing in a few callbacks from original Total Drama characters, like Bridgette being a vegetarian or Trent having a weak stomach, and a little nod to the Brunch of Disgustingness challenge, which shows that Total Drama is one of the few shows that could get away with showing uncensored vomit.
However, one thing that is worth noting in this chapter is that I got to show more of the new dynamic between Cameron and Lightning, and how their new and improved teamwork led to them finally getting first place for the first time. There's also a few interesting interactions, mainly between the teams made of up former Total Drama contestants, specifically the Surfers and the Performers.
Oh yeah, and the fact that I had Owen do the eating challenge instead of Noah. Come on guys, that was pretty much a no brainer. This is Owen we're talking about for crying out loud.
Rankings:
Brains & Brawn- 1st
Reality TV Pros- 2nd
Sisters- 3rd
Ice Dancers- 4th
Performers- 5th
Surfers- 6th
Stepbrothers- 7th
Goths- 8th
Adversity Twins- 9th
Best Friends- 10th
Father & Son- 11th
Rockers- 12th
Elimination order:
LARPers - 18th
Tennis Rivals 17th
Geniuses - 16th
Vegans - 15th
Fashion Bloggers- 14th
Mother & Daughter- 13th