So, I have one more week off work, then I'm back to face the crazy children in my school. We've only had the most vulnerable in during lockdown, so I have been fortunate enough to work from home for the last 7 weeks. Last week I had no tasks left to complete- hence I picked this story back up- I hate unfinished business! I'm going to be honest, I don't think this is my best work, it's a bit rushed, but i'm on a short time frame here! I never find time to write whilst working at this school- its a behavioural school- so it's full on; so ideally I would like to get it finished before I return. So I apologise for any typo's in advance- I spend ages proof reading, but yet I find so many errors after I post, that it drives me nuts. But my aim is to finish this fic before the 1st June, so updates will continue to be regular.
Although, not too far to go now, if you've read a second chance, you'll know what I mean.
Take care, be safe and thanks to those who review- it really does serve as positive motivation! x
Part 17
They've been lying together for a while, not saying much, just enjoying the feel of each other's body. It's only their second time together, in what feels to them like ages, and it's been the most tender, the most loving of all: no barriers, no anxious desire to please… just re-connection and love.
From the build up to Vermont, to all that's transpired since Liv came back to DC, it's hard to believe that they are here now. Of course, they still have a lot to figure out, like: how and when they plan to tell her parents? Or whether they will stay in DC, or go back to Vermont…
Last night, Fitz brought up the subject of Franklin. He assured her, that his intention in bringing him up was not to make her feel awkward or bad, but only to ensure that he was out of the picture. She was honest, as she explained that after she had told him that the baby was not his, he was hurt and upset, and without further discussion about the state of their relationship, he had stormed out of her flat. As far as she's concerned they are over, but in fairness to Franklin, she still owed it to him to have that conversation. When asked if she had feelings Franklin, she admitted that she did care about him, he had been kind to her, but she was not in love with him. She had never been in love with him.
It was enough to put Fitz's fears aside.
He runs his hand over her belly. It blows his mind that he's about to be a father again. Although, he would be lying if he said the prospect of that didn't scare him. For one; he wasn't exactly a spring chicken, he was at the age where he would be expecting grandchildren, not children of his own. But his greatest concerns about becoming a father again stem from his strained relationship with his daughter Karen. He had made such a bad job of parenting her after her mother died, that it has raised serious doubts about his abilities as a parent. But unlike his usual approach, of burying his fears deep, and not sharing them with Liv; he is trying to face his worries head on, and part of that involves discussing the difficult stuff with Liv… Starting from now...
"I really do hope for this baby's sake, that this time round I will be a better parent".
She looks at him stunned and a bit saddened that he would think so little of himself. He's always been too hard on himself; it's something that she plans to address with him in due time. But in response to what he's just said, all she wants to do is reassure him that he has nothing to be worried about… She places her hand on top of his. "Fitz, this child will be lucky to have you as a Father, just as I am luckily to have you as my lover, my partner and my friend… We all make mistakes, and what happened between you and Karen has been hard on both of you, but it also happened under very tragic circumstances; none of which was not your fault…"
"I know…" he replies wistfully, soaking up her words and rational.
She rests her head on his chest and hugs him even tighter, as she adds softly, "Your heart has always been in the right place Fitz, and it's a good heart, don't you ever forget that".
Truly touched, he leans forward and kisses her on her head. "Thank you," he breathes.
For a little while longer there just lay there in companionable silence. Fitz is drawing lazy circles on the delicate area of her nape, and she, snuggled underneath his arm finds herself rewarding him with soft intermittent kisses to his chest... She sighs in contentment, because for the first time in months, she feels at peace.
They've made some massive strides on this rocky path to love, and Liv recognises the personal lengths that Fitz has taken to get to this point in their relationship too. But she would be a naive to think that the road ahead is going to be any smoother. Does it worry her that a lot of their future rides on Fitz's ability to stay true to his promises, oh course it does- however, she wants to trust him.
When it came to her relationship with Fitz, and that of her father's, she has always known that they would have a battle ahead of them. And although the thought of it sometime frightens her, she has always been ready to fight for their love. She can only hope that this time round, Fitz will be ready too.
But right now, she can't help but feel selfish in wanting to simply enjoy this moment of bliss between them, uninterrupted, without interference from the outside world; just for a little while…
She rests her chin on his chest… "Fitz?"
"Yes".
"I've been thinking?"
"Uh huh?"
"Now, I know we decided that we wanted to hit the nail on the head with Dad straight away, which I agree should be done soon, but I'm also thinking, that maybe it can wait for a few more weeks…" At his raised eyebrow, she continues to explain… "Okay, so hear me out… most women don't announce their pregnancy until they're into their second trimester, and I was thinking that maybe we should wait until then to tell my folks…"
He's curious as to where this is coming from, "what's brought this on?"
"Well, I've only got three more weeks till my second trimester, and I thought, that maybe we can spend those three weeks, working on us, building us back up… without the extra added drama, you know? What do you think?"
"I think it's a good idea too, we do need some time for us to grow… but Liv, I don't want you to think I'm only agreeing because I want to prolong the inevitable and avoid telling your father… I promised you that I would, and this time round I don't intend to break my promise… I won't let you down again."
"I hope not."
He smiles at her… "I mean it Liv… I love you, and I know I've been a coward and it's taken me a long time to get here, but I'm here now, and if I have to spend the rest of my life proving it to you, and this baby, then so be it… Because I want this, and most of all I want us to be happy."
She looks at him so intently, it's as if she's never seen him properly before, and then slowly, ever so slowly, she begins to smile as she raises herself up his body, to kiss him, so deeply, so probingly, that he can feel his desire for her surge through his body. So can she, but before they take it any further, she pulls away from him, and tells him with no uncertainty… "I love you Fitz".
xXx
For the next two weeks, working around Liv's shifts at the hospital the pair embark on a series of dinner dates. It's funny really, because most couples hang out and go on dates, long before choosing to settle down and have a baby… But to be fair, their relationship has been nothing but unconventional, so in a way it works for them. During this time, they've really had a chance to get to know each other properly, and they have found that outside all the angst and drama that they have been accustomed to, they really are compatible; well compatible in a quirky "opposites attract" sort of way. He's old, she's young; he's a morning person, and she's definitely a night owl… Her preferred dinner date, is sharing a large pepperoni pizza, curled up in front of the tele and his is a 5 star Michelin restaurant with all the courses. But no matter their difference, one thing remains the same, they love each other and they want this to work. Two nights ago, Fitz had summed their relationship up perfectly… Liv was the Ying to his Yang.
As for outside interference, it's been tricky, but as it stands, they have successfully managed to keep their budding romance under the radar; with the only exception being Quinn of course. Granted, it took about a week of groveling, before she finally gave in and forgave Fitz for all his misdemeanors, but now she has fully resumed her role in the Olitz fan club. In truth, she's been a great support to them both and an amazing friend to Liv.
Next week, Liv has her appointment for her twelve-week scan. And even though the event will also mark the end of their three-week grace period, they find they are more excited about seeing their baby together for the first time, than worried about the pending announcement to her folks. Because, not only have they grown as a couple over the past few weeks, but they have also grown as individuals. Liv sees a newfound confidence in Fitz these days, that is refreshing and, in many ways, damn right sexy, and in turn, his confidence has renewed a lot of her faith in him.
They believe, that as long as they can stay strong and stand tall together, then they will be able to face whatever life has to throw at them... her family included.