A/N:

sorry for posting late i love you too ffn just not as much as ao3

Chapter 11: aizawa is a dumb

Steven peeled his eyes open, staunchly fighting the urge to let them close for longer than was needed to blink— thankfully, his blaring alarm helped him fight the call of his bed quite effectively.

Getting up before he could second-guess himself, he went through his usual morning routine. Today was his first day where he'd be assisting with 1-A's hero training in an official capacity. He'd be under Aizawa's tutelage outside of those times, and along with some sort of class he'd be taking on Saturdays, they would be preparing him to receive a provisional hero license.

Nedzu had explained, on the day following his arrival, that by getting said license he'd have more freedom to use his gem abilities in the hunt for a way back home. While it wasn't necessarily circumventing the law, it did mean if anyone questioned him on what they thought was his quirk, he could just flash the card and absolve himself of any legal troubles.

Steven wasn't fond of the idea, but accepted it as a necessity. Although there probably wasn't a point anyways, since he'd basically accepted the fact that Gems as a race probably didn't exist in this universe, or at least the observable universe.

Which meant he was a sitting duck. He just had to trust that his family would figure it out, no matter how long it took.

But that was another reason why he was getting this license. With it, he'd be able to defend himself and his newfound friends from villains, should it be necessary. It was a matter of practicality, and on that he agreed.

Which meant he'd be receiving a crash course on heroics from Aizawa over the next two weeks.

Yay, education.

The excitement for the upcoming day Steven normally would have been feeling was very much subdued, unfortunately. Instead, his mind was preoccupied with thoughts of the previous evening and the disastrous attempt to talk to Midoriya.

Thinking back on it, practically everything that could have gone wrong did. In the first place, the way he'd basically cornered Midoriya was downright horrible. Midoriya probably felt trapped, and the way he shook was out of fear of him.

And then, despite promising to himself to remain calm, for the other boy's sake, he'd gone full pink when he heard just what Midoriya thought he was. Thankfully, he'd gotten control of himself almost immediately, but the consequences couldn't be understated.

Just the very thought of… of the Nomu… made the bile rise in his throat, an involuntary pink tinge affecting not just his cheeks but a majority of his face. It was the Cluster all over again. Steven still had nightmares featuring the gem mutants, and he doubted they would every go away. To have something similar be happening in this world?

It was enough to make him sick.

His involuntary reaction scared Midoriya even more, and now he doubted that he'd ever have a chance to reconcile with the student. He wasn't lying when he said he didn't know how to gain the boy's trust, especially when he had very real reasons to be wary.

He just hoped that time would prove his innocence.

Fully washed, dressed, and awake, Steven wandered into the kitchen. Unlike the other times he'd gone to get breakfast, there actually were a fair few students bustling around with their own foodstuffs. He narrowly avoided walking into a panicked Uraraka, whose mouth was filled with some sort of food as she ran back for the stairwell.

He quickly made himself a bowl of cereal (Japanese food was great, but sometimes he needed something a bit closer to home) and sat back to watch the chaos unfold as more members of the class woke up.

Kirishima and Sero were begging Bakugou to make them breakfast, while Ashido and Kaminari off to the side had accepted that it wasn't going to happen, therefore attempting to make their own. They did get it, eventually, though they could have probably asked someone else and gotten something much more edible in far less time.

Tsu was… sitting on the wall? And eating bugs?

Oh, right. Frog quirk. He supposed that made sense. It didn't seem weird to anyone else, so he just went back to his cereal.

Todoroki sat down next to him with a bowl of some sort of noodles. Steven greeted him with a smile and a "good morning," and the scarred student grunted in response. A few minutes of comfortable silence passed between them as they watched the disaster that comprised his classmates.

"Is it always like this?" Steven eventually asked, when he finished his cereal. In the corner, Shinsou was drinking coffee straight from the pot.

"Mm," Todoroki hummed in affirmation, finishing off his own breakfast. "Most of the time. Sometimes it's louder."

"Huh." Steven glanced at them one last time, attention catching on Yaoyorozu, panicking as she stood over a burning pot.

Well, it wasn't dissimilar to the chaos of Little Homeworld, that was for sure.

Todoroki asked, "Why are you awake so early? Are you joining our class for good?"

"In a way," Steven grinned. "I'm actually going to be helping Aizawa-sensei in your hero training classes. And I figured, y'know, why not. Sounds fun, and it's not like I do anything else all day."

Todoroki tilted his head. "Are you not… are you still searching for a way to return to your home?"

His smile fell dramatically. "I am, but… I don't have high hopes," he admitted. "Even if there were Gems in this world, I'd have no way to contact them. I'm basically stuck, and my only choice is to wait for the Crystal Gems to figure something out."

Todoroki remained silent for a long moment, but eventually placed his hand on Steven's shoulder. "I'm sorry. It must be horrible to be without your family."

"It is," Steven said, holding back a tear or two. "But I have faith in them."

"Hey there, Aizawa-sensei!"

"Universe," the hero acknowledged. Steven arrived twenty minutes before the beginning of class, ready to receive his instructions for his first real day of teaching humans.

"So, what's the plan?" Steven rubbed his hands together. "Am I leading any activities? Perhaps I'm teaching them a new topic?"

Aizawa looked at him with a deadpan expression. "Something like that. I'll explain more when we actually do it. What I'm more interested in is your experience in teaching."

"What about it?" Steven asked. "I think I'm pretty good at teaching. I practically ran Little Homeschool."

Aizawa, again, just looked at him with a deadpan expression, and Steven got the unspoken question. "After we dismantled the Gem Empire, a lot of gems wanted to come to Earth. But, the thing is, most of them had basically no idea how to do… anything? Most of them had never even seen living beings— much less humans— and even more didn't even know what they wanted to do, since everything they'd ever done in the last couple thousand years were direct orders."

"So you were… teaching them how to have free will?" The teacher asked.

"Something like that, yeah," he nodded. "There was also stuff like meditation, gardening, and so on."

Aizawa huffed. "Well, be warned that what we're doing here might be quite a bit more difficult. I fail to see how teaching gardening could be anything close to as infuriating as what I've had to deal with."

Steven groaned. "You don't understand, Aizawa-sensei. The gems are so stupid sometimes. Worse than children. But they're also geniuses too! Like one day we were working on making high-power lasers just for fun, and the next I had to stop them from eating the flowers in the greenhouse! It never occurred to them that vegetables and flowers are the same things! And I've told them a million times, but they just don't listen."

"Welcome to teaching, Universe," Aizawa nodded solemnly. "They always manage to shock you. Literally. Kaminari has stuck metal objects into electrical outlets on more than one occasion."

Steven groaned. "Some of the gems do that too. I just— why?"

Before Aizawa could answer that, the door flung open to the one and only Iida, who paused upon seeing Steven.

"U— Steven-senpai!" he said. "I was unaware that you were joining us for today's classes!"

"You don't need the -senpai, Iida-san," Steven gently reminded him. "And yes, starting today I'll be joining your hero training sessions as Aizawa-sensei's assistant."

"Truly?" Iida straightened. "Then I look forward to our class and learning from you!"

The student sat down, but his presence effectively put an end to Steven and Aizawa's conversation. They exchanged a few more words, mainly on the logistics of their lessons, but ultimately Steven leaned against the wall and politely greeted the incoming students.

Midoriya came in with Todoroki, and used his place next to his friend to both hide from Steven and shoot a suspicious glare at him.

And wow, didn't that make him feel horrible, but he didn't have time to dwell on it as the next few minutes went by in a flash and Aizawa called his students to order (or, as close as could be managed with a class like this).

"An announcement before we begin our morning training," he said as the class's volume lowered to a near-silent murmur. "Beginning today, Universe will be joining our hero training classes as an assistant to me. While he currently may not be as well versed on specific hero-related topics, you may find him to be a reliable source of help in relation to combat and rescue. Which, coincidentally, is what we'll be working on today. Suit up and meet me at Ground Beta."

The students scrambled to get their hero costumes, and Steven followed Aizawa out the door like an excited puppy.

"Alright," Aizawa nodded as the last of 1-A disappeared into the main building. The exercise had gone well, and even if Steven wasn't able to do much more than shout advice and provide minor healing, he definitely felt more productive than he had since he'd arrived.

"Sensei?" Steven asked, as the hero turned to face him in the now empty fake city.

"Fight me."

"W-what?" he stuttered.

"Fight me," Aizawa restated. "Not the way you did on the day you arrived. I want you to use your full power— no holding back."

"Aizawa-sensei, I— I can't," Steven emphasized.

"Oh?" Aizawa questioned. "Are you insinuating that I'm weak? I assure you, I am highly competent."

Steven shook his head. "I know you're strong, but I just… I don't want to hurt you."

He raised his eyebrow. "So instead, you cripple yourself? What happens when you're fighting someone who necessitates the use of all of your power? What happens when you can't control yourself in that state?"

"I don't—" Steven's face felt warm, and not in the flustered and blushing way.

"What happens, Universe," Aizawa continued, heedless of his student's feelings, "when an innocent civilian dies because you refuse to use enough power to stop a villain? Or worse, if you strike the finishing blow because you have no control over yourself?"

"No!" Steven stumbled, the unnatural discoloration flickering over his entire body. "I wouldn't—"

Aizawa glared. "Really, Universe? Can you promise that? Because I've had students fall down that path, and no matter how good your intentions are, it seems you'll be joining them if you can't master your own abilities."

The intensity of his words, the way Aizawa was nearly accusing him, all of it combined was enough to get him to the breaking point. Steven screamed in anguish as the light overtook him, and with hardly a thought he rocketed forward faster than the human eye could perceive.

In a split second, a crater formed where Steven once stood, and a second one erupted where Aizawa was sent through a wall. At the moment, however, Steven wasn't thinking about the potential injuries he might have caused. Rather, his stress-addled mind distorted the world around him, and all he knew was that the man thought he wasn't enough, that he couldn't protect his family— that he was a monster.

Somewhere, subconsciously, he recognized that it wasn't true, and that Aizawa might not have meant the things he said, at least not fully. Unfortunately for the man, however, Steven didn't have the presence of mind to realize that.

"I will not!" he yelled, running into the room where AIzawa was attempting to stand up.

"I won't hurt my friends!" Tears streamed down his face, as he came face to face with the battered and bruised hero. "Not again!"

"I am not a monster!"

The words reverberated throughout the city, and it was this statement that shook Steven himself. All at once, he realized…

What am I doing?

He gasped, coming down to his knees next to the newly-collapsed Aizawa. The pink didn't fade, couldn't fade thanks to his stress, but he did recognize what he had done. He allowed the still-wet tears to drip off of his face, landing on the teacher and healing his wounds, new and old.

"You see what I mean, Universe?" Even though Aizawa had been healed, he groaned in pain as his bones knitted themselves together. "What I said was tame compared to what some villains will do…" He coughed. "You need to work on this. I will help you work on this. Just trust me."

Steven shuddered. He didn't want to, he wanted to get control of himself in his own way, but he knew that Aizawa was right. He grabbed his hand and helped him get to his feet.

"Yes, sir."

Aizawa grinned. "Excellent. Let's get started."

The next several hours were spent training at a breakneck pace. Although Steven's gem physiology (especially when he turned pink) boosted his stamina to a ludicrous degree, by the time lunch came around, even he was panting.

A few buildings were piles of rubble now, and though he apologized profusely for each one taken out by a loss of control Aizawa just waved them away, saying that Cementoss would be able to repair them easily.

But by the end, he finally had a decent grasp on his strength when stressed this much— not his speed, nor his durability, but he could carefully dial back his strength at high power in order to avoid destroying entire city blocks.

A success, if he said so himself. Even if the entire time he was constantly repeating the phrase "not a monster, I'm fine," to himself, like a mantra.

Again, not too bad.

The only issue was the fact that now that training was over for the day, he couldn't snap himself out of his pink state. Usually, he could just stop, take a deep breath, and allow his negative emotions to just flow out of him, or at least lower their intensity. This time, however, those techniques weren't working, and every time he opened his eyes to see glowing pink skin served to increase his panic.

"Stop."

By the fifth time (or was it the sixth?) he restarted this cycle, Aizawa interfered and grabbed his shoulder.

"Sit down. Relax. Get a hold of yourself."

Steven focused on his teacher's words, doing his best to ignore the internal monologue running through his head.

"Problem child. Listen to me. Deep breaths, in and out, count with me.

In.

Out.

In.

And out.

Slowly, over several minutes, Steven felt the energy flowing through his body begin to ebb. Pink faded, leaving behind pale flesh, and the last thing he remembered was collapsing into Aizawa's steady arms.

When Steven woke up, he didn't realize where he was or what was happening. He rubbed his bleary eyes, arched his back as a yawn forced its way through his throat, and slowly got up from…

This wasn't his bed.

Steven instantly became more alert as he realized exactly where he was. The teacher's lounge greeted him as he stood from the couch he'd been sleeping on. Across from him sat Aizawa, half-lidded eyes never breaking eye contact with him.

"What—" Steven coughed, attempting to get words past the dryness in his throat. "What happened?"

"You were having a panic attack," said Aizawa. "I helped you through it, but it seemed the strain of using your powers was too much."

Memories rushed back, and he flinched at their not-so-gentle reintroduction to his mind. "Oh. Y-yeah, sorry about… all that." Steven averted his eyes. "How long was I out?"

"Almost an hour." The hero pushed something towards him over the coffee table, and he looked down to see a bowl of rice waiting for him. "Grabbed this for you since I figured you'd miss lunch."

That was thoughtful of him. "Thank you, Aizawa-sensei." Steven was sure he was blushing (the regular kind, thank you very much) so he grabbed the bowl and got to work on eating while ignoring Aizawa's scrutinizing gaze.

In the end, the silence was broken by the hero after a few minutes. "I do not push you out of any dislike."

"Hm?" Steven's mouth was full, but that didn't stop him from making a noise of confusion.

"Your training," Aizawa clarified. "I pushed you too far, but I'm not sorry for that. I regret the way I approached it, but ultimately we need you comfortable with your power. I won't have you being a liability."

Steven swallowed. He was starting to understand the way Aizawa expressed concern, and this even contained the hidden hints of an apology. With that in mind, he smiled.

"I won't let you down!"

End Notes:

so...

yea school started and i find myself with less motivation and less time to write soooooooo

updates will be very erratic! but generally expect a week or more between updates.

my other fic (des cendres) will be going on an indefinite hiatus because i definitely won't have time to do that.